Oh, the Misery. / valefisk Twitter: / valefisk Twitch: www.twitch.com/valefisk Company of Heroes Total War: Warhammer II Crusader Kings III Crusader Kings II Democracy 4 Hearts of Iron IV Hoi4 #pain#gaming#valefisk
@@cryst4l_clear456 🎶This is the game that never ends. Yes it goes on and on my friend. Some people started playing and not knowing what it was and they'll continue playing forever just becuase this is the game that never ends...🎶
The clown board seems like a pleasant place to be, since you don't have to draw any pain cards. For future versions of the game, make the clown board more painful.
Next video: "I invented an actual honest-to-god physical torture device and locked my friends in it", followed by "building a torture device in federal prison"
I wanted to play this with my friends the other day and the moment I saw it wasn't on the workshop CRUSHED me. I so wanted to introduce them to the chaos on display here
I just thought of a way to make the "everyone go back" card less painful, yet more chaotic. Add an option in the shop to remove that card from the draw pile and put it in the discard pile. If the players don't want this card drawn, someone will have to pay for it every-time the draw pile is remade. Which means, it becomes an interesting variant of the prisoner dilemma, wherein each player has the option of spending their precious money on this, or be greedy and hope someone else pay for it.
even worse: add an option to pay to add it back into the draw pile someone loosing horrendous can now bring everyone else down with them, sowing discord and chaos.
I genuinely want to play this game with my friends but it would be absolutely fucking unplayable because of all the inside jokes and references that none of us would get
I feel like the distrubtion version of this game is one with "[insert in-joke here]" for the game master to fill in and the table top simulator tutorials valefisk used.
the most torturous part of this game is that it's crossed beyond the barrier of the video and affects the viewer because we can't play the game for ourselves. truly the most torturous part of the game
To be fair, if Vale DID play, imagine him trying to GM while being an Italian Shrek who can only quote Lord of the Rings. Yeah, it would be an actual nightmare.
The problem with the "everyone goes back to start" card was the number of players you had. Increasing the players rattled through the deck faster than in your testing, so there wasn't enough time between resets. It makes the winning strategy just enduring the pain and aiming to collect up enough cash to buy victory.
@@binguloid actually, pretty much exactly capitalism. The only difference is this one was deliberately designed to be unnecessary torture, while the only reason Capitalism is like that is due to humans *really* hating actually fixing their systems when upgrades become available IRL. They're fine with pointlessly trying to find ways to persecute each other though, but that's neither here nor there, although it might be a good add on for Vale's next game.
I can't imagine the confusion somebody watching with the sound off would've experienced seeing "they killed my wife" keep popping up. This game seems like the best and worst time of someone's life simultaneously
Considering that the "Win" in "You "Win"" was in quotations I thought if you land on it there was gonna be a card that said something like: "You realize that it's the journey, not the destination that matters. Go back to start". Considering that the last game Vale made was unbeatable, I’m surprised that this one was beatable. He was so merciful.
Secret alternative pain deck: If a player is speaking in a French accent or imitating Charles De Gaulle when they land on Pain, they get a card from an alternative deck with bread-themed, mostly positive cards.
pain card 1: go make toast pain card 2: have a sandwich :) if you're under the conditions for pain cards and not pain cards then you're. running out of bread
@@rafaelmarkos4489 Yes but with this one the pain isn't instant. You have to live with the existential dread that it doesn't matter how much progress you’re making, as unless you finish the game, everything you worked for is gonna be gone.
To make it a bit more fun, whenever you grab it again, the timer extends just a bit, so people would have to through the pain (lol) faster in order to have a chance at this
I love how the guy who got Joe Biden just did a Senator Armstrong impression instead and everybody went with it. Edit: Hey RU-vid, it would have been nice to know that editing my comment to correct a typo would have deleted the heart that Valefisk gave me before I did so.
This is my first and favorite Valefisk video. Whenever I feel sad, or sick, or bored, or need something as background noise, this is one of the videos I always come back to. Thank you, Valefisk, for bringing me joy through the torment of your friends. I only wish I could be this problematic while keeping my friends and sanity. Truly, you are a role model I will look up to for years to come. XD
Vale. My god Vale I know what must be done. What game allows for more gaslighting and bullshit than any other? Thats right, a TTRPG dungeon crawl. Build the single most hellish Dungeon imaginable and force them to fight through it. Even better, pitch different genres and styles of games to all your players so they each come with the most disjointed, out of place character possible.
My personal favourite trap suggestion. You allow the players to observe a 31ft long corridor. At the end of this corridor is a corner turn leading to an indestructible, locked door. At the start of the corridor is a trap warning, crushing plates of instant death for anyone who steps into the corridor, but they only trigger 50% of the time. No tricks. No skills or ways out of it. Just a 50/50 chance of death every time you cross the corridor. But what about the locked door you ask? Well, scrawled in black chalk are nordic symbols which correctly translate to "the key is hidden behind the sign." The players are then forced to possibly cross back over just to get the key, then again to unlock the door. Which would then turn out to be a dead end
@@timeenoughatlast3368 And just a cherry, have the germanic runic alphabets be mixed up and all written as bindrunes, to make translation that much more difficult- but in reality the sign has a decorative border that is actually secret instructions in Ogham of how to find a series of buttons in the corridor you have to press in an order, only to do nothing
It's crazy because if they actually worked together they would be finished by the 3 hour mark. But for some reason winning an arbitrary game was too appealing
I think part of the problem was that it took a few hours to figure out how they needed to work together. I wouldn't have thought that there was a way _to_ work together until after the "Everyone goes back to the start, lol" card was mentioned...
@@coconoisette if they agree have one person go forward and everyone else always choose "return to start" it would minimize the chance of return to start appearing
I love how seemingly half of the cards force players to speak in quotes, add random noises to sentences or just straight up gibberish. It's the tower of Babel all over again
What if instead of removing the "everyone back to start" card after some time, certain spaces were outlined and if you're in one of those you get to stay there? perhaps the final loop could be fully protected, or maybe all but one, and in general they're sorta like chance checkpoints randomly scattered across the board
but if that were to happen then i would get rid of that cards entire purpose sure people would go back to start but not everyone like the card says and we gotta follow the rules now trust me its better this way
Valefisk at the start of the year: "I've decided I want to become a youtuber full time" Valefisk in the middle of the year: "Scratch that, I want to become a torturer full time"
Seems like the key is to nominate one person as the savior, and then get everyone else stuck on clown boards just going in loops so they can't land on pain spots and reset.
yeah because theres a pain card that send everyone back to start so you cant win if there are too many players they eat through the cards and send everyone back alternative tactic is everyone conspires to spend all there money sending them back so they can stay near the money tiles near the start
kinda feels like the best strategy is to just endure the negative effects as much as possible and just quietly roll for money until you have $100 to pay to win the game.
11:03 The hell I actually would've know the answer to that question. Since I'm a Finn, my dad has told me about the Winter War between Finland and Russia in 1939. Afte the war, Finland agreed to pay war indemnities to Russia. For some reason, I would always remember quite precisely the details about the payment. This included over 100 ships and huge amounts of timber, forestry and metal industry products. Frying pans for example. All this would amount to over 300 million US dollars, which when converted to Russian rubles, will amount to roughly 17,5 billion rubles.
Finland is such a neat country, not to mention the great legends who rose from that time. Simo Hayha, and Lauri Taurni. The White Death, and The Traveling Hero (that's what I call Lauri Taurni, considering his history.)
@@Zeppe2 I learned of both thanks to a certain Swedish metal band with historically themed lyrics. That also just so happens to have gotten a holy artifact from the Church of Poland. Delivered by the Archbishop of said Church himself at a concert.
"Cocolate" is probably due to bad OCR when scanning a printed document directly to PDF. That is why many legal documents online have spelling errors, they're typically printed out in a serif font like Times New Roman where some of the details are hard to parse by the software.
Because I'm a huge nerd I actually looked up the document. The official one doesn't have the spelling error. Also the actual recipes are about 1 page long. The rest is a lot of very specific anti-'there ain't no rule' legalese about the quality of the ingredients, the way they want it packaged, and the way they're going to inspect the final product.
I'd unironically like to play this with my friends myself. Maybe with alcohol involved. And me running the game rather than playing. And, probably even more alcohol.
naming suggestion: the game of purgatory anyway, please make this puplicly available in the workshop and if you do please add a feature that lets you add your own prompts. that would be so awesome
As someone who still has 2048 installed on their phone from when that was popular, and still plays it regularly. That 2048 card is brutal, there are a few strategies for the game but an immense part of it is just luck of where the next number spawns, and all it takes is one bad spawn to end a run.
@@suburbanshrub6675 same this was legit like the only 'challenge' i could do without ripping my hair out.... god forbid i get chess cause i don't know how to play my uncle tried teaching me a few times and that went horribly....
it is fairly luck based but as someone who's played it for maybe six years or so, as soon as i got my first 2048 it somehow instantly became easier to me. bad luck can kill a run or at least make it a lot more inconvenient but if you know how to adapt your strategy a little then it's not usually a big deal. imo the worst part about the 2048 card is just that it can take like a good 10 minutes to actually win a game but i guess with how much they were fucking about that isn't too long lmfao
At 18:00 - idea for a modification to the game: Make certain negative effects be contagious, so that if someone lands on the same space as another it can get passed to them too.
This would also make the Pain deck get progressively larger as copies of the cards get sent to the discard when removed or replaced, making the game more viable with larger player amounts without removing the "everyone return to start" card from play. Not a bad idea at all.
Just based off the start, this reminds me of a board game some friends and I made. It was like the game of life but it was full of terrible things that could happen to your person. The starting portion is very similar.
Anyone recall that old story about the knight that plays chess with the grim reaper to try and extend his life? Imagine if the knight pulled this b++++++t out.
@@kirbywithlegs98 My comments with swearing get hidden by RU-vid more often, and little experiments like this show me how often comments are shadow banned.
@@juliewinchester1488 Try it yourself. Make a comment where you would normally swear then make a comment where you don't swear. Big tech has always restricted speech, they can't help it; it's in their nature.
I got unskippable youtube adds interupting me 4 times during this video. Cudos to them for making the viewers not only watch but experience the intense torture theme of the video xD
I may genuinely have gotten an uncharacteristic unstoppable nosebleed every time I have watched this video...still want a physical copy of the game tho
"Go outside and touch grass" Me who lives in a house where the front and back yards are concrete and bricks and the nearest park is a 30 minute walk away
I made a board game that was also hell for a middle school project. It was a mix of monopoly and the Oregon trail. It was based off of a book called “a long walk to water” so I appropriately named it “a long game to water”
“Using shift with your thumb” just unlocked a core memory of mine about some fucking freak in a streamer discord I was in who was convinced that using your keyboard like that was was completely natural and normal, and the dude had like a 4 inch long thumb and thought everyone else was crazy.
The real question is how in the hell you find such amazing military pdfs. I'm putting together my own game inspired by yours to torture my friends, and I can't find any for the life of me.
I'd suggest that the "Everyone goes back to start" card is instead put in a second extra deck that is only drawn from when a deck needs to be reshuffled which has semi-permanent effects.
