Lady Mary and Lady Edith's Turbulent Relationship | Downton Abbey 

Tom's soft little "Mary, don't" gets me every time

Edith had one of the best character developments I have ever seen. She went from the sort of ‘ugly duckling’ to the most beautiful characters. She went from wanting everything her sister had to having everything and more. A brilliant woman who owned her own business and made a life she wanted.

Sybil was the bridge between them and with her tragic death all Hell broke loose.

Before the series even started, it's clear that Mary was planning to be engaged to the man her sister loved, though she cared little about him and was stalling in case a better offer came. And she did so with the blessing of her parents who were aware of everyone's feelings, even though Downton would have stayed in the family whichever daughter Patrick had married, but they just thought it was Mary's birthright. Edith started with such disadvantage that whatever she did could never compare to Mary's perpetual dismissiveness.

Edith, in my opinion, had the most growth overall of she and Mary. Both of them grew into modern, independent women but Edith grew more in maturity. I do not recall Edith picking fights with Mary at all after season 1. Additionally, I blame their parents for allowing some of the abuse to happen and they not say anything about it… such as when Mary came in with her haircut and dress and had no empathy for her sister on the death of the man she loved. The family groaned but said nothing to correct Mary’s behavior.

I don't condone swearing, but Lady Edith giving Mary the business has the be the most satisfying moment in the entire series.

Tom gave Mary scolding she deserved.

The biggest difference between the two is that Edith grew up while Mary grew worse

To add to my previous comment, I also noticed that this video includes the clip of Mary being unbelievably cruel to Edith after the news that Michael died. For me, this was the moment where I lost any and all respect for Lady Mary Crawley. Here, you had a grieving woman. I don't care how long Michael may have been dead. Receiving news that a loved one has died is still a gut punch, how matter how long it took. Instead of being supportive, Mary chooses to kick Edith down at her lowest point. That is absolutely something that no decent human being should ever do. I also have beef with the family on this. They never should have gone on that picnic that day. They should have put it off a few weeks and lent a supporting hand to Edith. I saw an earlier post that said that it was selfish of Edith to expect them to not go on the picnic. I don't think wanting support from your loved ones after receiving devastating news is a tall order. Add to this the fact that no one in the family offered Edith any words of comfort. I can't blame her for being upset at all.

Everything that goes on between Mary and Edith is entirely their parents' fault for ignoring it and always giving in to Mary.

Through the seasons to the movie, Edith changed, grown up and became a professonal, modern, brave woman while Mary is still that Mary.

Where is the most classic clip of when the Dowager says, "Weekend? What is a weekend?" to Matthew? That is the greatest line in the entire show.

It’s pathetic how Cora instead of empathising with Edith tries to make her feel bad instead . Cora has been a bad mother to Edith for most of the show except after she knew of marigold - she never reprimanded Mary strongly for bullying Edith , she herself dismissed Edith as the daughter who will care for them in their old age , Edith once told her she never says nice things to her as she says for Sybil and Mary , what kind of a mother doesn’t get to realise that her daughter is pregnant - the aunt and grandmother figured out but the mother ddnt !!! Poor Edith . She received more love and care from her aunt than from her mother

Edith was actually trying to spare Mary's feelings by putting Bertie off from announcing. But Mary still stuck the knife in.

Boy, did I hate Mary in those scenes! I'm an older sister myself and I know how annoying and exhausting it can get between sisters at certain stages, but not in a hundred years would I have emotionally abused my baby sister like that!! Even when you got a really bad day, not many girls with a shred of self-respect, dignity or intelligence turn into such big sister-bullies! How depressed you may be about your own life, your self-worth is not gonna increase by putting down your younger sibling. And if you're observing that behavioral pattern as a parent, do intervene. Don't let any sibling establish the other as any sort of outlet, only so he/she won't have to deal with his/her own deficiencies.

Mary is the abuser , and Cora is the enabler, she never stood up for the victim Edith, good for Edith for standing up to these bullies

I’m very much Team Edith. When I think about Edith’s worst act, writing to the Turkish embassy, I think, “She did it when she was in her early twenties and after enduring constant belittling from Mary.” I can understand that. And for any Mary stans who try to argue that Mary never attacks Edith without provocation I’ll say, “No. As early as the first episode, Mary was mocking Edith for being sad over Patrick dying. From the beginning, she’s shown that she’ll be mean with or without provocation from Edith." When I look at Mary’s worst action, revealing the truth about Marigold’s parentage (though her behavior after Michael’s death confirmation was what really caused me to turn on her), “She only did that because she doesn’t want to see her sister, who she considers inferior to her, to outrank her.” There’s also of course the fact that Edith, who is the unfavorite in the family, does infinitely more to improve their relationship than Mary, the golden child. I don’t take kindly to golden child characters who do nothing to improve their relationship with the unfavorite.

I like the Season 6 final episode's scene where Mary and Edith have a final happy ending, where they acknowledge their rivalry and yet acknowledge that they'll stand by each other because they are sisters. Can you upload that scene as well? It'd really complete this compilation.

The vengeful-happy look Mary gives at 5:43 is priceless.

These two characters have been had so much growth throughout this Series. Edith from being constantly overshadowed to ranking higher than the whole family! While Mary used to be very snobbish and constantly rude, but now her soft side has shined through and I love her more for it. I'm so glad that they recognised their differences and sealed a sort of friendship between eachother at the end of the series. This is why I love DA! ❤

I'm here for the Team Edith comments!!! Hell yeah, my favorite character!

8:29 Edith definitely had a good point here. I was on her side 100% but the family didn’t back her up as they should have - not a single one. I was always sad it didn’t work out for her and Micheal Gregson. They made a great pair. And Marigold was such a gorgeous little thing.

Mary had it coming and Edith delivered it like a missile!

The relationship between the Crawley Sisters stem from a rivalry on a societal level. Lady Mary being the eldest daughter, comes with high expectations and a sense of duty. Lady Edith has a classic middle child syndrome. Her fate in life is set by society but with far less expectation that either Lady Mary or Lady Sybil. Sybil being young and rebellious, is more free spirited. Lady Edith is seen as the rival, everything is a competition. It's Mary's way of securing her position within the family. At the same time, Lady Mary is just that a Lady. Because of which she cannot inherit the estate or title, less through marriage. Which is the only reason why she was aligned to marry Patrick Crawley. Their match would have secured the estate and title for generations to come. Now that Lady Edith is the Marchioness of Hexam, she out ranks that of her parents and her sister. Why do you think the King wanted Bertie to serve as a "chaperone" to the Prince of Wales during the first Downton Abbey movie. While there are many scenes left from this video, the one I feel is most befitting is when Lady Edith is seen retuning to Downton, just as Lady Mary is getting ready for her wedding to Henry Talbot. It is in that scene where Edith reminds her sister that soon they will be the only ones left to recall the days and people of their youth. They will be the ones to tell Sybiee of her mother. For that I Love them both. 💜

Edith had her ugly moments but she quickly matured and bettered herself. Mary was always the childish one always throwing jabs at Edith. I’m glad Edith got her happy ending and they made up

Aw. That end bit should be in the middle. Honestly, there could be a whole clip episode of their relationship, up and down.

I side with Edith because everyone seems to dismiss her while worshipping and pandering towards Mary (including their parents). Edith has her faults but if I remember correctly, Edith usually did what she did after being mistreated by Mary.

2:38 I just about clapper the house down at this bit. Haha

Lady Edith grew into her personality and she blossomed into a beauty. Lady Mary on the other hand....her character began to show in her face. The more spiteful she bacame, the more pointy her face bacame. Excellent actresses.

The Kemal Pamuk storyline has always really bothered me. He DID force himself onto Mary!

There has always been either Team Mary or Team Edith, both were equally horrible to each other.

LOL this video is long overdue. I will forever remember Cora's quote about thinking it'd be like Little Women, having so many daughters but it is actually quite the opposite in reality.

I wish I had of gotten in on this thread when it came out but better late than never. What I really like about this series is it gives normal, everyday people a peek into the daily lives of the *aristocracy*. There lives are about rank, position, tradition, name and inheritance . Lady Mary had a very clear understanding of this and took full advantage being the oldest daughter. I saw Edith as the child always seeking approval and validation and in a twisted sort of way Lady Mary was a catalyst for Edith in getting past her own emotional limitations to becoming a confident, successful, independent woman in a time when it was rare to do so. But let's be honest as we saw there relationship unfold, when Lady Edith had opportunities to go after Lady Mary, she swung for the fences, so she wasn't an absolute pushover. Now that Downton Abbey is streaming, I can't stop watching it. I see something new everytime!!!!!

2:04: Packing so, so much into the word “Edith” in private is some masterful acting, especially with her overt war stance against Edith in person. You really get the idea of how it is with them.

I want a scoreboard of how many times these two have spited each other.

5 : 24 Tom : Mary dont Mary : Mary YES!

I think Mary was, in fact, jealous of Edith's superior intellect, hence all her attempts to ruin her sister's life. Mary is clever too, of course, but rather like the Dowager, whereas Edith just seems sharper and more academically educated. After all, Edith didn't get a job as a journalist in an all-male British press for nothing.

Some of you take this very fictional show WAY too seriously.

How can people love Mary, the spoiled brat is still beyond me after all these years.

Really loved Michelle Dockery’s slight nod and raising up her glass, such a nice subtle touch with that scene.

Sisters fraught one another that Mary and Edith do throughout these seasons, knowing they put aside their differences or standing against each other even to glad they patched up for the final season.

Sometimes I wish I had had siblings, but I’m sure we would have torn each other to pieces like these two cats.

I understand Mary and will always always love Mary (a bit more like Carson than Mrs. Hughes). I'm happy for Edith but she was vile vile vile at the beginning and that's a tough act to forgive especially from a family member. Loved Edith's character development and happy for her 'ending' but I don't think it was out of character for Mary to act the way she did... she's still impulsive and vindictive but she rightfully so realized she was out of line almost immediately. Proud of Edith for not forgiving so quickly. What a fantastic show... so many shades of a person and never a strictly 'good' or 'bad' character (for the most part)

I remember absolutely loathing Edith in the first season. As the seasons passed she became a more sympathetic character and i began to see what a b***h Mary could be as well.

I’m planning on rewatching this series soon. I miss this and it’ll be good so it’ll be done just in time for the second movie

I am team Edith! Mary was a bully but her father and mother was too

Those that live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones

I'm an American.. my parents an grandparents would disinvited me to stay in their home if we could not be decent to one another. They would read us both the riot act no matter how old we were. They just wouldn't put up with it.

Haha being in between two point scoring sisters… my face has looked like toms for the past 30 years haha😂

They are mirrors of each other. Oftem when an event involving a man, happens to one, something similar will happen to the other.

Seeing how Edith wrote to the embassy makes Mary's behavior make more sense - revenge, Edith almost ruined Mary. I am not saying it makes it better.... but it at least explains it.

Sisters, sisters never were there such devoted sisters...As the song goes

Edith loos like a monalisa. Laura Carmichael's timeless classic beauty.

Mary in a sore loser, while Edith is a successful woman, who owns her own business

I LOVE EDITH!

They really do deserve each other.

Mary was vile in telling Bertie, but I also dont think Edith should have pushed her. She knows what happens when Mary feels even a little bit attacked.

Mary and Edith didn't know what's sorority means. Sybil did.

Lady Edith has always been my favorite, not Mary… ugh. Both in looks and personality. But I suppose since Mary was the heir, she got top billing.

I couldn't stand Mary. She has a major case of "SBF" even though what Edith did to her in the first season was awful!

They were so utterly poisonous to each other with absolutely no excuse whatsoever!!

They remind me of my siblings. Except that in my family Mary's the youngest, Edith's the oldest and I'm basically Sybil, who instead of the youngest is in the middle. However, instead of passing away, the rift grew between the youngest and I. You can only be neutral for so long..

These clips are not in chronological order.

I really hate marry she is really selfish person

I am all Team Edith , but when I see the breakfast scene again I realise Edith’s “ Henry has abandoned you “ was unthoughtful - not that Mary didn’t deserve it , but she was poking the bear . She should have just smartly steered Bertie out of the room . A normal Mary is bad enough , a dumped and angry Mary …. Ah well 😅

Mary is such a mean girl.

Yes but it was a bit contrary ..mary lacked compassion for edith throughout whereas with even servants, she was better.. it not normal really..

Turbulent? That's one way to describe it. 🙄

I do think Mary sent Carson out of the room because she didn’t want him to see what she was about to do. She’s still my second favorite character, The Dowager Countess is my absolute favorite character.

Interestingly Mary reacted worse when she was geieving for the death of her husband and others were talking about such things.

SISTERS

What Edith did with the Turkish embassy was despicable

Edith should have gone upside Mary's head with that suitcase on her way out the door.

Edith and Mary are both characters that I really like in Downton Abbey, but even then there were times that I didn’t feel sorry for either of them. I understand why Edith wrote to the Turkish embassy and I understand why Mary did what she did in regards to Sir Anthony breaking it off with Edith. I’m an only child so maybe I could be wrong, but Edith was jealous of Mary and I think in turn, Mary was jealous of Edith. There were even moments where I think Mary was jealous of Sybil; first episode when Duke Philip arrives, Mary gives Sybil this look after she (Sybil) and the Duke are introduced to one another.

ma sarebbe possibile vederlo in italiano?

Edith wrote the Turkish embassy about her sister Mary! So who's really the b---h?

SISTERS !!!!

I'm Team Mary all day but I'm glad Edith got her happy ending. Her landing a marquess was a nice surprise and her development as a career woman and person were great to watch.

💙💜

Poor Edith. Lol. She never learned when she was outmatched.

just like kim and kourtney

It's very hard to look down on Mary outing Edith to Bertie just a few minutes after watching Edith brag about writing to the Turkish ambassador.

I always love it when Mrs. Hughes points out how unloveable Mary is when Mr. Carson is fawning over her. Couldn't stand Mary from the first episode.

Edith was right to call Mary a Su£t! She was an remained so! she was manipulative, cold, and ruthless! This scene at the table summed Mary’s personality up perfectly! I rejoiced when Edith married up and Mary had to bow to her!

Why are people forgiving Edith for writing that letter? Each of us would be mad as Mary, or even worse.

Mary is my favourite... Ugh, she's savage! Terrible! I love the drama! haha

I still like Mary better. She's just so ruthless. Edith always wants to pick a fight, then she can't take the smoke. It's endlessly amusing to watch. Also the Turkish ambassador move on Edith's part was so idiotic. It would have shattered ALL their marriage prospects. And I still can't stand Edith for jerking Marigold around and destroying the family at Yew Tree Farm.

Diese dumme Tante..Lady Mary ,konnte ich nie leiden.

Edith wasn’t as helpless or innocent as everyone thought she was in regards to her ongoing freud with Mary. How ironic she called Mary a sl@t and she ended up doing the exact same thing. She enjoyed playing the victim.

The writers did a very good job of creating, in Lady Mary, a woman stuck in nursery jealousy. It's not unusual, for a first child, pampered and adored, to suffer utter outrage when another baby comes on the scene who is also now being pampered and the centre of attention. The first child can become quite vicious from shock, fear of loss of love and approval, and and need to put the intruder down at all costs. It becomes a habit and we see that this is fostered by Mary being overly indulged. Her behaviour at table, for example, would never have been tolerated by a more balanced family - certainly had I spoken that way to my sibling, I'd have been sent away to my room supperless. But her American mother never reproves her, so she just continues being this way and getting worse and worse. The writers and actors did a good job of portraying this psychology.

People often say how Mary is abusive against Edith, which is true if you only see part of it, but the root of the problem was never about that, it is was always about Edith's jealousy against Mary, for her station and beauty (how easy for her to charm a man).. And that jealousy spun up all this rivalry. In terms of position Edith is at the same as Sybil but you never see this kind rivalry between her and Mary, people say that Sybil is more of a free spirit, which is true, but most importantly she isn't jealous of Mary, and that's why Mary loved her without any reservation. The death of Sybil did bring them together for a while, but as long as one or both of them remains unmarry this rivalry will continue. And that is why at the end only after Edith achieved a higher status than Mary they could make peace... I wonder why... oh yes, because in the eye of Edith she won and there is no more jealousy coming from her. So no, once you get to the root of problem and understand it, you see that every time they fight is because Edith started with her own jealousy, and Mary being as a very private and also a very prideful create responds to that jealousy. And the funny thing is Edith was never at the level of Mary so basically every time she will eventually get slap in the face. That's why every time Edith comes across some damaging info against Mary she won't hesitate to go full nuclear without thinking the consequence to the family, like the Pamuk incident. She didn't hesitate to ruin everybody's lives just to destroy Mary. But some may say Mary did the same with Bertie telling him about Marigold. It seem a little bit low, but keeping a man in the dark is wrong, if Bertie can't accept Marigold then he is not right for Edith at all, you can't start a marriage with a lie, but the consequence would only limited to Edith, I don't think Bertie is the sort of the person that speaks ill of Edith even if they cannot be together. On the other hand the incident with Pamuk was to spread the rumor to ruin Mary and the Crawly's family for good. These two matters can't even be compared as to the damage and ramification. So no they are not the same, not even close. Edith's arc, in short, is that of a second ugly jealous sister with inferiority complex that like to throw a monkey wrench once in awhile. I don't think the writer did a good job with her, she would have been a fantastic negative character like O'Brian.

Just when I think I cannot stand the Lady Mary one more minute, Lady Ediths true color's are shown. I can honestly say now, I really dislike Lady Edith far more than Lady Mary. Their jealousy towards each other and vindictive nature never ceases to amaze me.

Mary was my favorite. Edith is an energy vacuum

mary is vitch, edith is osum, m ay rite?

I love Mary ..franc...stubborn..sassy and honest..true to herself and her opinions..even when is told to be heartless...Edith plays the victim when in true she is jealousy and spite..full of lies...knowing well that the one that attacked first was her !!!

Team Mary. Mary gets by on wit and cleverness and owns it. Edith gets by on playing the victim card and then using it as an excuse to do whatever she wants, expecting people to say "poor you, aren't you an angel" if she's discovered. No one likes a drama queen.

I never liked Edith. She is the jealous kind.

The look Robert gave Tom after he told Mary Henry went to London - without saying anything. 🥹. “You deal with your sisters”

Sisters, sisters never were there such devoted sisters...As the song goes