Thank you for the video Tiffany! This is such a good example of how God works in our lives even after we get married. Often, there is a misconception in the Church that the reason folks are single is because God is still prepping them for their spouse. This video shows that God can and does use marriage to help us grow/heal and that not everything must be perfect in our lives, relationship, or character before God blesses us with our partner.
This is SO helpful!!!!!!! This is something I've been working through lately too. The disconnect between what we "know" to be true and what "feels" true in the moment is crazy! I know my husband loves me unconditionally, yet my brain can "feel" differently if I perceive another girl to be better than me. "Why wouldn't he want her, she's so XYZ which I don't have!"-- even though I know it's not true! That's where therapy helps so much. I love all of your tips!!
Thank you so much for this video! I’ve been in a relationship for a year and 3 months now and it’s been my first and Lord willing my last. But in the past few months I’ve become very jealous and become very insecure about myself. Hearing your story resonated so much with me because my girlfriend is very much like your husband James. Very people oriented and wants to communicate with others. She just loves people. And I’m here thinking like “oh this guy is taller and good looking, she wants him probably” or “I’m not interesting” (I literally said that exact same thing to my girlfriend). I know it’s not healthy and I know it’s not okay. I want to change because it’s really affecting our relationship and me. Mentally it’s draining and I love my girlfriend and I know she loves me. But the enemy is so good at inserting those lies and false narratives, and I admittedly fallen for them lately. And I feel upset with myself and shameful. But because of yesterday’s argument with my girlfriend, I decided I want to change this area and I want to surrender it to God. I’m tired of it and this again, really encouraged me, that we are never too far away to being the best version of ourselves. She’s never given me a valid reason to not trust her. She’s shown me love and I need to start not taking that for granted
Good for you, and James, for everything you did to get to the healthy place you are today regarding this issue! Having grown up definitely NOT one of the pretty girls, I think the only reason I almost entirely avoided this problem was that I married soooo late. By the time I did, I think both my husband and I were very at ease with ourselves. He's had female friends. I've had male friends. We both talk to whomever at social gatherings. But through it all, we are WE, no question whatsoever. And as you say, a shared life (with later-in-life shared stuff) cements the centrality of that "we".
Thank you so much for sharing your experience with this! I love that you were both so at ease with yourselves already by the time you married. what a gift!❤️❤️
I appreciate you so much, I love how vulnerable you are always willing to be with us. Thank you for sharing. I love that your back to making regular videos, although of course I understand how busy you are x
Great video. When I got married, we went from newlyweds to expecting parents. We conceived during our honeymoon and celebrated mothers Day and fathers Day before our first anniversary. Marriage is a beautiful sacrament and it needs to be treated as such. But there are struggles with that. I'm glad Tiffany and James are able to share these experiences.
We're just in our second year of marriage and I recognize the "cycle" thing. We've had specific conversations/fights over the same subjects over and over again. And every time it feels so heavy at the moment. Then afterwards it's fine and we grow stronger bit by bit. Stone by stone. Step by step. But I think I have never cried as much in one year as the first year of marriage. Sometimes his triggers, trigger my triggers.... get what I mean? But God teaches us a lot. It does come down to grace upon grace. Forgive.... And leave some things to the Lord.
Dang, I feel that so bad, the crying so much during the first year! Even in our first year of the serious relationship, it bring's up soo much things we had & have to work through! The weight of "didn't we just talk about that?!? Why do we have to go all over again and it feels like going nowhere?!" But talking thouroughly about it when we have more energy makes it much better. Plus knowing we both stick during the very hard parts is SO precious. Best for both of you!
That totally makes sense. I love how you described it as step by step, it really is. And so much learning how to love each other in the struggle!❤️❤️ thank you for sharing!
I'm struck that one will sometimes hear very similar sounding stories to this from people who are being gaslit. I wonder, if you do another video on this, if you could talk about what are the key differentiators that a person in a situation like this could use to determine whether as you describe you genuinely needed to readdress your own thinking, or whether they are being made to feel like that by a partner? I'm guessing it's pretty clear to you now but how did you know in the moment?
That is SUCH a good question and perspective!! Thank you!! I talk about that a little bit more in this video 👉 ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-D0HR2WufCb4.htmlsi=vTr3Ek0so80U_WVv But i should probably address it even more!! Have you found specific differentiators? The ones that come to mind for me right away are 1) the other person unwilling to change, isn’t open to the possibility that they might need to do something different 2) they make you feel like you’re crazy for even thinking such a thing 3) they don’t want you talking with other people about it Those 3 things are definitely signs that you’re being gaslit, I’d say
