Living with Narcissism: A diagnosed narcissist opens up about his struggles, recovery and growth 

Its nice to watch a conversation like this. I like therapists that make things more of a conversation and the client isn't visibly afraid of the therapist as one who has power over them. You can talk psych shop all day and it gets boring to everyone even the client quickly. And if the therapist has a lot of self worth issues on their profession they come across as the narcissistic therapist if that makes sense. I love when a therapist says they don't know. Its such an educated wise answer that can be so therapeutic.

Thanks, Ruth Ann, for having me on your channel... really enjoyed the conversation & appreciate what you're doing. Hopefully we can talk again in the future 🙂

My husband is a covert narc … now I know why he really enjoys owning his own business for over 30 yrs .. he gets all his supply In there … and nobodies telling him what to do 😵‍💫

This is my favorite conversation on this topic that I have seen. Such compassion and thoughtfulness on the subject. I don't believe I have NPD. I believe I have other issues that I am ready to work on. I actually think I have toxic empathy if that term is actually a thing. This has made me susceptible to someone whom I believe is NPD possibly. He ticks off a lot of boxes and has been breaking my heart for 1.5 years now. I am bewildered and traumatized and wish things could be different but slowly ending this relationship. I really love this conversation. John is making his contribution to changing the stigma of this condition. He comes across as gentle and thoughtful, and not at all what one pictures with someone struggling with NPD. No monster here. I like his approach as well as Dr. Ruth's compassionate approach. Too many people are cruel about it. Removing the stigma will get more people to come forward for help.

really good, thanks for sharing this, I am a narcissist as well.

This conversation felt so deep and rich for me. I don’t have any “cluster B” diagnoses, but I relate so much to John’s perspective on what the work of recovery (or maybe “discovery,” if there wasn’t an original wellness to start with?) looks like “under the hood” of how any particular diagnosis has us steering our way through life. John, if you read this, I’m glad you were inspired and emboldened by others to also share your experience, perspective, and liberating insights! I was impressed with the breadth and depth of what you contributed to this conversation, and encouraged to keep going in my own complicated “discovery” process. Best wishes to you as you go on as well. 🙏🏼

So glad I found your channel. I appreciate this approach to personality disorders more than other mental health practitioners that seem pessimistic and condemning.

For me, recovery looks like awareness. I still have the thoughts and feelings, I'm just aware enough of them that I can hopefully make a different choice.

I don't know, but ive seen many posts from people having to start their life over. It's not easy of course, but that's a lot of what he is saying in this video isn't it? But people do it all the time. And yes, the unknown can be scary. Sometimes we have to face the scary, and start from scratch. And that relates back to the compost pile.

John seems like he just needs a friend

I'm super grateful that I have a capacity to go deep into myself and the ability to do the work because the root causes have allowed self acceptance. That's where I can change.

Very good listen. Thank you for the efforts to raise human consciousness and awareness. 🦋🌲🌺🌸

Thank you for sharing the things you have gone though with us here. God bless you.

So much new insight..

Inspiring, pray to the guy for his effort. Two thumbs!👍👍

This was crazy helpful ! Thank you soooo much !! ❤ I really appretiated it..

What a non-platitudes, highly insightful conversation. 🙏 Thank you, so much.

1:07:20 *Spiritual Growth,* far from being primitive and naiive, is a phrase that captures a view of suffering and surrender that sees it as worthwhile. But it requires faith. It is desperately lacking in our world. Jesus assured us that "The Kingdom of God is within you" Buddhists also speak a lot about _"Forbearance"_

Enjoyed this video thankyou. Reaching out to the unknown is definitely scary. Staying in the path that we are familiar with is so much easier, but not always better. In the end of life, at whatever time that is, would it be good to have found our true self? Would the title, riches, etc. Satisfy the heart? We only get 1 life here on earth.

It sounds as if his fear is once the pathology of his MPD is basically handled... What's left will not be sufficient to actually prosper or be able to function as a "normal" adult... Which makes perfect sense considering. How does one go about building 1's self from scratch at the age of 40,50, etc... very scary at best.

At first i was annoyed and found him super long winded for saying nothing (just like i am lol), but skimming through the video, i really enjoyed the message around 1h, i understand it as letting go of the expectations and welcoming whatever happens, welcoming the disconfort of actual experiences and interactions. I don't know what condition i have if any, but i find myself (unfortunately) resonating with a lot of NPD stuff, and i have a hard time dealing with myself and others if i don't comply, or if they don't comply to whatever i was envisionning or think is required. Leading to anxiety, procrastination, quitting, leaving jobs, ending relationship, stagnation and shame in every area of my life. I should start trying this "welcoming disconfort / disappointment / hardships" attitude

"Welcoming the dealing with" Nailed it!! 💪👍

Wow. This was very interesting. Almost amazing

Amazing conversation. Loved the metaphors. Excellent.

Awww….Ruth is the name of my dad’s mom and Ann is the name of my mom’s mom. My middle name is Ann also.

Seems to be perfectly fine person

This guy is very smart and articulate, but being his therapist might be difficult: he has an incredible tendency towards intellectualization and abstraction, probably the reflection of a bright but restless mind. So, instead of getting real down-to-earth narrations of life events and real down-to-earth descriptions of the emotions they generated, the therapist - I imagine - might have to listen to endless theorizing and abstract "philosophy".

Thank you for this interesting interview. It would be great if you could make a video or discussion on something which I think literally every youtuber on narcissism would say is a nono and returning to a trauma cycle - the possibility of going back to an abusive relationship and changing it, ie. breaking the cycle within the relationship, with new understanding and insight from the 'abused' person in the relationship leading the way.

So is this now the only way to succeed. Sell your broken parts and pretend a bit harder. Criptic honesty in exchange for supply. I dated a mental health nurse who spoke the same way, and it was all lies and projection. The day he gets tired or gets put in a un expected situation without notice of it. Dude will revert hard. Aggressive mimmicry in exchange for supply. Good luck to good people. Know your enemy.

These narcissists that get therapy aren’t true narcissists. How could they be?

These are not narcissists, and there is no recovery. giving people false hope is abuse and toxic positivity

There is no recivery