Mark Is Too Stupid to Understand Sports 

I feel like Mark would love Aussie rules since it's insane and pretty much what he described minus actual guns- though you never know 😂

RUGBYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i love rugby

rugby union

@@bunnyday1473 minus guns, plus ballet and tiny tiny shorts

🤣🤣🤣

their

There obviously is three teams in football. 1. The opposite team. 2. Your team. 3. And the team with the guns.

Read my name☝️

@Don't read my profile photo Okay

The guns? Of course!

Handeggball not Football

It's called backyard foodball.

It really does- xD

LMAOOO

SKILLET

@@orpheus4282 SKRILLIT!

@@danharris761 Sk sk ... Skittle Sk sk skimmer ... spatula ... no ... skrillet ... wait ... skillet!!!!

WHAT IS BLOODBOWL I MUST KNOW

@@xMythStarx Warhammer Fantasy universe football. Basically, fantasy races compete in a bloody, brutal and quite potentially lethal contest of 'put ball in other teams scoring area'. You've got humans, elves, orcs, goblins, ogres, halflings, demons, undead, vampires, ratpeople and more.

I searched about blood bowl on RU-vid and the first one was mark's videos playing the game 3 months ago xD

I showed this to my die hard football fan dad, I am now disowned, still worth it.

​@@xMythStarx it's a dice game tho

@@crashedandgone2122 reference to ISWM

yeah i noted all of those, maybe this ties in with in space with markiplier in some way, adding to the markiplier lore?

@@crashedandgone2122 that's from the Warfstache videos, it represents trying to find a meaning in a world that doesn't have any and stuff like that

there was a similar glitch in the smash/pass gametheory pokemon video

@@diamondmemer9754 It's not that. The noir detective theme is also in In Space With Markiplier, which we're currently right in the middle of.

It is really hard to make the "one person logically making way from point A to point B and the other trying SO hard to derail them" thing work.

He’s confused but he’s got the spirit

Imagine if this was an actual tactic that the government would use for mission in their special ops forces.

Stop calling it football when it’s NOT football in the slightest

Look into Blood Bowl

I am pretty what mark was describing is called active combat.

me too.

Same. I only saw games because I was in Marching Band.

Me 2

That is exactly what he is

Me when anyone tries to talk sports with me tbh

That is indeed what folks with adhd do

in other words, I'd finally sign up for football

Hell it even sounds accurate to Americans as well.

@@Darin_Tomlinson hell yeah bro wanna go to the game but make sure you bring your Glock you’ll never know when you need to shoot a winning shot into the air as we chug our beers with a corn dog in our lap. Yeehaw

@@Noelleanderson 😭😭 most American thing ever

@@cydneylucy2139 nahhh the grammars to good

@@sallybotsstobyllas7611 American detected

May I introduce you to bloodbowl

I need to see this

@@crazypartyguy7330 That is what I am thinking too.

Might make American football worth watching 😂

same. or i just want to see him try football but just be doing stupid shit like trying to form a line of 11 players

It's really fun and as a person who does not care about sports at ALL learning with through Tyler's immense knowledge and Marks complete cluelessness is fantastic extremely interesting and hilarious

I too was never interested in sports, but I started listening to the podcast because of this animation and am quite enjoying it. I’m now on episode 9. So I do encourage anyone else to listen too!

I swear I saw those In Space with Markiplier references there

as an American who hates football and has only ever attended one game because I was getting paid to be there... I will agree and say this is exactly what it's like

As an American who loves football this is exactly what it's like

As an American Football BALL who has been hit by a stray bullet by the "special team" that has been flown in by a silent helicopter I can confidently say that this is EXACTLY how this game is being played.

this is how Americans wish it was played tbh

yes yes please do, it’s a lot more interesting in my opinion 😭

Some of the other comments are saying Mark invented Rugby, so I'm gonna have to start paying attention to that now lol

I think the problem is, it would be fun to watch _the first time._ Maybe a couple times. But the thing with professional sports is, you have to exploit EVERY advantage you can get. So suddenly a move that was a surprise upset, "holy crap what's going to happen next?!" becomes a guaranteed thing, happening every single game, probably *several times* each game. That gets old and stale really quickly. Not to mention, these kinds of tactics with 6'2", 250lb dudes (average height and weight for American football players)? That's gonna be murder on their backs and shoulders, plus serious, dangerous injuries would skyrocket. Most sports develop their "boring" rules because the whole point is to keep the focus on tactics and choices, where there is no obvious guaranteed strategy. And games that _develop_ a "guaranteed" strategy are, or at least are hoped to be, ones that are ripe for a sudden shift, where a new strategy that punctures a hole in the old one comes along. (This is, more or less, how the "full-court press" strategy rose to dominance in basketball, as it was initially seen as "unrefined" in part because its roots were among African-American players in the days of segregation, but it proved to be both more interesting to watch _and_ better at winning games, which means most teams use some variation of it today. Now it has become the strategy _du jour,_ which everyone else searches for a way to break.) In general, you _want_ the rules of a proper sport to be boring, either because they're very basic (like soccer/football) or because they're very precise (like American football/gridiron). That way, the focus isn't on who _exploits the rules_ better, but rather on who _plays_ better. And I say this as someone who finds most sports not all that engaging. I'm a mega nerd, sports are for _other_ people (though frankly I enjoy the food on Superb Owl Sunday.)

@@ZekeRaiden id argue that by making no official rules the meta would still change every season maybe multiple times a season just because every time someone finds an exploit that becomes the meta then the next game the opposing team is trying to find an exploit that works specifically against the original exploit and would actually keep the game interesting since it'd actually be dynamic and constantly changing

@@ZekeRaiden 6'2, 250, that's like an average running back or Linebacker in thr NFL 10 years ago, so.... they bigger now, which means it's gonna hurt a lot more. Watching a 6'4 330lb offensive Guard pull on a running play is already terrifying enough. Letting him do whatever is a dangerous game

Rugby feels like a lawless brawl the first time you watch it if you're used to American football, but there are still lots and lots of rules. Rules in sports are what make it fun (and relatively safe) to play, but boring to watch. To be honest, even a no-rules deathmatch would end up being boring, a sniper in a Gilly suit or a drone operator would win every time. There has to be at least some structure to sports, just not so much as we have today, where gameplay is constantly interrupted by referees due to either technicalities or purposely taking a fall to play the rules.

Yup! My brother-in-law and husband both played defense on their highschool football teams. The general idea was to get yourself enraged before a game to "psych up" and not let anything get through, lol. It's almost like acting out a violent scene on stage in a play or musical. Find something that really angers you personally, then channel that into your performance. Except that in American Football, you actually get to hit people. 😝

Very nice

The hardest part is all the small rules and penalties. The basic game is easy enough to understand. Offense throws or passes the ball. They have 4 attempts to move the ball 10 yards down the field and then their 4 attempts reset again until they get to the end and score a touchdown. Usually on the 4th Attempt if you don’t think you can get a touchdown you kick the ball. If you think you can get it though the posts on the other side of the field from where you are you do that and score 3 points. Otherwise you kick it as far as you can and the other team is on offense now. Every play ends when the player is down or out of bounds and then everyone sets up again. After a score the team that scores kicks the ball to the opposing team. Touchdowns are worth 6 points and after the score you get one play to kick for 1 point though the posts or attempt to get the ball in again from a short distance for 2 points. Most just kick for the 1 point in this case because it is easier. There are tons of minor rules that make it confusing even for the players but that is the base of the game.

I play video games so this actully made sense to me. I actully understood some of this and now football makes a little more sense to me!

@@Woodshadow still too smal brian for me to understand

@@Woodshadow Very interesting, but even if someone explained this to me like they'd explain to a 2 year old, I'd still be lost because small brain no like-y footbul or any sport that isn't hockey

@@jeffkealy5951 FACTS same

Why are people being divided in this sport? Is there a third-back, too???

@@lexa2310 I think it's how far "back" you are from the line. A quarterback is a quarter of the way back, a Half back is half the way back, and a full back is all the way back. :D

@@MunchKING so a fullback is at the end of the field?

No, it's how far back they are relative to each other. So imagine the guy who snaps the ball (he's called the center) as point zero. The quarterback is right behind him, then the halfback behind the quarterback, and the fullback behind the halfback. So the quarterback is quarter of the way back from the center, the halfback is half way back, and the fullback is the furthest player back from the center At least, that's how it was when football was first being played. Nowadays the fullback and halfback positions have actually switched, so the fullback is usually in front of the halfback. Which means the position names don't make sense but are just leftovers from history Edit to add: I was saying "No" to Lexa, Munch King is correct

@@treykelly2598 Holy crap, I never put that together in the 12 years I've watched the sport...

Mark has said multiple times that does not know much about sports so probably both

When Tyler said halfback I knew exactly what mark was gonna say and I still died of laughter.

Corner back is sad in the corner

Me, an empath, knows jokes are funny

Lamar Jackson has entered the chat

@Good For Nutting If you don't care then why are you so insistent?

As an American who doesn't understand American footfall I also accept this explanation as canon

@@keatslocksley1919 as an American who has a friend that plays American Football, I also accept this explanation as cannon

As an American Football I can also accept this as canon

@@keatslocksley1919 dam it that's what I wanted to say 🤣

@@ringoferrer2343 as a non-American football, I accept this as canon

Do you hate balls that much too 😂

Did you see Mark's video(s?) on self-defense?

At this point I think he just ratted himself out 😂

Masochist isn't the same as kinks. says a masochist

Girl u sure ur not the one whos into the weird kinks and masochism yourself, wouldn't be surprised if u put yourself through that lmao

That's just an ad, it can appear on other videos

@@chaoscrow27 they’re not talking about the ad. they’re reffering to the random cuts in the video where mark and tyler glitch out and the screen shows hidden messages

@@anon760 OHHHHHHHHHHH I was wondering what the glitching was about

Its from markiplier's new video "the multiverse is littered with the corpses of your failures" from in space with markiplier.

@@Agent_ransu101 and the black and white old timeline

Hm so Christian-

plz plz plz mark do other sports!!!

....me

they're lesbian?

As a defensive lineman I can say he's telling the truth

Gridiron ball/handeggball NOT football

Why call it football when it’s NOT football?

It's Bob...

​@@EthanMoran1999 No, that is definitely Tyler. Tyler and Mark literally have a podcast about sports; how could it not be him?

@@Silver-StarGazing Incomprehensible, I have suffered a terrible fate.

@@EthanMoran1999 mark and Tyler has another podcast called Go, My Favourite sports team This clip, I believe is Football Primer

@@EthanMoran1999 ngl, I thought he sounded like bob too

@Lite Cosmo we didn’t asked

@@datsonicfan youtube has a bot problem, ignore and report them

Or.....both at the same time.

Both. Both

both. ALWAYS both

It’s NOT football if you don’t play with the ball at your feet

Offense gets four attempts to go ten yards or else the other team gets the ball. Those are called downs. That’s why you hear “first down”

@@thomascampbell350 Four attempts, to clarify for football noobs. Teams traditionally "punt" to the other team on fourth down to give them less favorable field position but by rule that's optional. That's why you hear a lot of "going for it on fourth down" toward the end of the game, or "they're in fourth down territory" whenever a team is behind near the very end.

As someone who isn`t american and hasn`t grown up with the sport, as good of the explanation of the sport may have been in this video, to me it was nothing but nonsensical gibberish, and it confirmed my pre-concieved notion the whole sport is kinda dumb... Though to be fair, even though I grew up in a country where football (not the American veriety, to be clear) is basicly part of our culture, I still don`t know or understand much beyond ball must go in goal...

I still don't get the special team thing, there's a 3rd team of special ops?

@@andreanastacio9548 Don’t worry, we have football in my country and I’m still clueless.

...Alternate football league? like, it's football, but they follow absolutely no rules, and everything just erupts into chaos? I could watch that.

@@justinsbuzz Australian Football League, or just footy as we call it here in Australia

@@madamadam4088 another Aussie let’s go! Tbh AFL is overrated tho no hate

@@Chungyboi-jk1wm to be fair, Aussie Rules football is a great game. Very fun to play. But the AFL ruins it.

@@tyrannicpuppy I 100% agree

Stop calling it football when it’s NOT football in the slightest

Right 🤣

its tyler? not bob?

I thought it was bob 😭

@@anastachios No, it's Tyler. Mark has another podcast with Tyler called GO! My Favorite Sports Team. Tyler has a Masters in sports administration and Mark knows nothing about team sports, so the premise is Tyler teaching Mark about sports.

Its TYLER!

Get the ball to the other end without getting whallumphed off the face of the earth by a man-machine is about as much as I can understand about American football.

Same but to be fair I ain't American so there is no point on learning any of that

But this isn't football...?

Simplest explanation I could come up with: 2 teams Offense and defense Offense has 4 chances to get touchdown (1st-4th down) If offense gets 10 yards, chances reset On 4th down, in most cases, offense will punt, but they can go for it and get the 10 yards Defense has to stop the offense Punt: offensive team kicks ball to other team because if they don’t make the 10 yards on their 4th chance, it’s a turnover and defense gets ball. So you punt for better defensive field position

@@SieMiezekatze even if you are American there is no point, it's really just a past time that people really seem to enjoy watching or playing.

@miko foin yes lmao

I’m pretty sure that was Bob’s voice in this video.

@@brandiriggall9715 no its tyler

As soon as I read this, Mark said it lmaooo

@@brandiriggall9715 OMG I THOUGHT IT WAS BOB TOO JAJDJDJAJSHA NOPE WE WERE WRONG

@Lite Cosmo well I’ve heard of Markiplier. I have no idea who you are so I don’t think you’re better I’m not sure but I don’t think you are.

And deadly!

Read my name💕💕

@Don't read profile photo no

If football actually worked like how Mark described it, stacking players included, I might actually have another try watching it

Stop calling it football when it’s NOT football in the slightest

@@oxfanblink4115blud hasn't heard of regional dialect before XD

​@@oxfanblink4115 Why are you so upset over people calling it football? I've seen you under every comment that mentions word "football" saying this. You have nothing better to do with your time?

@@SlightlyStressedOatmeal It isn’t football if you use your hands more than your feet to move the ball. So as a Brit it’s annoying

@Don't read profile photo we wont

Read my name😢

Wait timestamp plz😭😭😂

@Kavetion nobody cares anymore

@@cinnomorollbun 0:20 the op commenter worded it a bit differently tho

So are you a knives, whips, or chains kinda guy?

@@hopsinburneraccount685 No, he's a the whole nine yards kinda guy.

He described lineman me so well.

I can further confirm that @chris cisewski and Mark are correct

Ayy fellow D line!

It’s NOT football in the slightest

Hey what's that supposed to mean I'm a band nerd and I play football, cross country, Track and field, and am good at all things. NATURALLY.

As a band kid, that's fair. Watched it for four years in high school and I still don't know what's going on. Though to my credit I did yell tackle him a fair bit in my senior year XD

Band kids always had to play in the Pep band, attending every game, lots of exposure to football.

@@kerikrogel9126 my school didn’t have a football team

@@kerikrogel9126 dude im a band kid and i dont know shit about football and neither does anyone else in the band. thats just my experience lol

Now I wonder what IS you're understanding, please tell.

Every episode whenever Mark says what he already knows about a sport before Tyler goes into a deeper explanation, Mark always knows more than I do 😅

Lol same. I still don't get it

4 years of marching band and I still don't know what a first down is.

Then he remade football with guns, sounds like markiplier.

Thats just how neurodivergent people work lmao i do the same things mark do

that's bob

wait oh my god it's tyler that's why bob's voice was so weird

plz plz plz mark do other sports!!!

The "correct path" through the project will be trial-and-error navigating your way across the field without encountering the special ops.

Can confirm, Mark just ordered a Ghillie suit.

@@benjaminoechsli1941 And the captain of the special ops turns out to have been Wilford Warfstache all along.

I really hope he does do that.

YES OMG

@sokin jon honestly, as an American, who is also in band and forced to go to all the Friday Night Football games to play for the teams for morale and stuff... I wish it was played like this! Then I wouldn't have like 10 pointless time killing games on my phone specifically for football season lmao

@@Rynn- Lol same.

And the fullback reference too

@@condified1796 god, could you imagine that unit? No manager or coach ever want to trade their full back for 4 "lesser" quarter backs

@@muhhamadavdol3781 Agreed, the system has become more "valuable" than the terms of quarter, half, and full back.

American Football.

@@muhhamadavdol3781 I wholeheartedly agree with your statement

Bob

@@BigMeefer GMFST is Tyler and Mark. Tyler is a sports knower 😌

@@BigMeefer I thought it was Bob's voice as well but no, it's actually Tyler lol

@@vipbacon they’re both the same, like Jekyll and Hyde

@@vipbacon jeebus

Yeah Can’t Wait For Part 2

oh hello! ive seen you a bunch of times!

Lol

I kinda know what you mean. Every year there’s a tv compilation of GOOD commercials but it keeps getting interrupted by a bunch of weird dudes playing hot potato tag

So what is this, a podcast? The link to the spotify does not let me find this whatever podcast name is

Why call it football when it’s NOT football?

@@oxfanblink4115 are you British?

@@brotherc8993 Yes and actual football is so called soccer. Not the almost rugby league for massive wimps who don’t know what it’s like to be properly hit version

Read my name..

Yeah!

These replies are sad

What in the actual fuck. OK, seriously, RU-vid, get your shit together. This _cannot_ be legal. It's really sad and just sick how the comment section has just gone completely down the toilet.

Read my name..

I'm unable to like the above comment because its already at 69 likes

markiplier is a genius

I saw *"The multiverse is littered with the corpses of your failures..."* Still holds the same dark as heck meaning doh-

When

I agree

Honestly, my Dad would probably get a laugh outta this. And comment that I watch some strange shit.

I thought that was Bob through the whole video?

@@icy8042 it says Tyler in the description, but I thought it was Bob too lol

@@elementalcardboard me too

I think mark specifically asked him to lol

It's basically become a staple of the podcast, and it's great. Tyler's getting really good at it too!

LOL

@sokin jon same

What are they adding

tyler is not a jock lol

"Jock Tries to teach Sports to a Ex Band kid with STRONG ADD"

Stop calling it football when it’s NOT football in the slightest

yea fr 😂

For real

Read my name🎉

I am so sorry about all of these bots, jesus christ Leaving this comment to counteract them ✊😭

@@Instabruh.User.. shut up,we didn’t asked.

*high-pitched noise that causes fear*

I showed this to my die hard football fan dad, I am now disowned, still worth it.

We call this a difficulty tweak

I was not expecting a fucking PAYDAY reference, wow, thank you.

I have the cloaker sound effect as my alarm

as a band person, i can fully tell you, no marching band member has ever actually watched the game. he was probably more occupied watching the trombones see how many cheez-its they can shove down their throat at once or something of a similar insanity level

@@Clover_tongue It's always the freaking trombones isn't it 😂

@@flipflopzthreeonethree1873 every dang time

@@Clover_tongue I am a former high school band person, and I will say the only time I cared was when I had a crush on one of the players. I understood 4 lives to go 10 yards, once you make it 10 or more yards you get refreshed back up to 4 lives, and you have to make it to your end of the field without running out of lives. Also, players got hurt, and I didn't want the player I had a crush on to be tackled to the ground because that meant he was more likely to be hurt. ... 8 years later and that's still all I understand, but instead of having a crush that I don't want to be hurt, I have a nephew that I don't want to be hurt.

4:39

ultra straight football player. edit: Now that I think about is, transbian really hates ball

Well that's unfortunate since they are all men.

ok but its the best way to describe a defensive lineman

"Another day, another crisis"

It reminded me a lot of Bioshock infinite since you'd constantly stumble across rifts in Space and time that lead to like an alternate reality

yeah, was this a reupload because i remember a version without them

It would be sooooo much better

Me too

I watch and enjoy American Football, but I can't understand how the big beefy offence line, who are tasked with blocking the defensive line from reaching their quarterback, are not then the defensive line for their own team. Why does a team need 2 full squads plus substitutes plus a special team? Especially when you hear stats that a team has a really strong offence but a mediocre defense, or vice versa, you can't help but think the team would be better off having their better phase perform both tasks. They can't even argue it is a matter of endurance, since there are a lot of pauses within the game for recovery and those guys are all kept in great physical condition.

Me too

Not being judgmental is masochism now? Does anyone in this community own a dictionary? 😭😭 /hj

@@judestarbabypup The "I don't judge" wasn't a reference for the masochist part, the "knives, whips, chains" part is. 😅 The pain and enjoyment and whips. Etc.... that is where the masochist lies hahah

IT'S A POWER THING

@@judestarbabypup It's also a running joke of Markiplier doing things which inflict pain on himself then insisting he isn't a masochist.

@@judestarbabypup sorry! i should've added the tone indicators in there when i wrote it; it's been a running joke in the community that markiplier likes feeling pain being inflicted onto him and yet continues to claim he isn't a masochist; it was a joke, and i've edited it with tone indicators to help ^^ hope you get the joke now, though! /gen/lh

I call it Pootball.

The fact that paintball isn't an Olympic sport is a tragedy. It shouldn't be an issue at all, just regulate the gear and everything should be fine.

@@rafewarren1034 This made me chuckle way too loudly

Paintfoot

@@StuffandThings_ I would of never thought of that. I actually like it better.

@Don't read profile photo we dont care about you

@Don't read profile photo Reported for spam and self advertising.

@@lans2636 its a bot

@@cburn6691 No. It's Tyler. See description.

It’s NOT football in the slightest

Step 1: Watch the ball.

its like any sport, you don’t need to know all the nuances and rules most of the time, all you have to know is run all the way 6 points, allowed to try to get 2 or 1 more points after scoring, cant run all the way, kick ball for 3 points

Same

That’s not Tyler, that’s Bob...

@@MystralThunder babe, look at the description

@@MystralThunder wrong podcast

Quarterback get ball Quarterback throw ball Defense tackle