Listen to the Full Story Here ►► open.spotify.com/episode/1CiF... Did you know that I used to do parkour? It went about as well as that episode of The Office... Animated By ► / @haricz More Animations ► • Markiplier Animated!
How was that not the immediate thought. I was thinking, did he call? Or did someone else call, after he passed out? Is he even alive? spinal injury likely.
The fact that they just...let the guy walk off despite obviously having his ribs shattered was insane to me, imagine if that was the last time they saw that kid. 😭
yeah it almost certainly did, i injured myself in a similar way just falling from a chair, and it led to back problems, so an injury as serious as the one he got would definitely give him at least some back problems
hi, mild parkourist here. to put this animation into perspective the highest that the beginner 2 (so good but still learning) students at my gym drop and roll from is about 4 feet onto a mat, and most of them still mess up the timing. Mark dropped from 4x that height as his first time ever doing a shoulder roll. that is insane
So, I went to a parkour gym once and my experience was somewhat similar to Mark's. Well, without the cops bit. This was an actual gym with padded floors and proper climbing equipment to practice on safely. Not the sink-or-swim approach of falling off the side of a parking garage. It was front flip day. The set up was a 15-ish foot stretch of mats, then a short barrier (probably 1.5 - 2 feet tall) and then a set mats behind it to land on. Similar to Mark, I'd also made a... calculated error. I'd never done a proper front flip before; Only ever into a swimming pool. Otherwise, I had no parkour experience, whatsoever. I'd seen people do flips, watched some videos on how to do flips, and understood the basics of how to do a flip successfully. So I'd thought. And so, we were all lined up taking turns flipping over this obstacle. Everyone's doing fine. Perfect front flip after perfect front flip. Then, it was my turn to go. I take a second to kind of figure out my approach. Figure out what foot I'm going to start on, how I'm going to launch into this thing, and then I just go for it. As I'm running up to the barricade, all I'm thinking is, "Okay, I just need to get my ass over my head. Once I'm there, reflexes will take over." I cleared the barrier, ass over head, exactly as planned. I started bringing the feet around, so far so good. Then, I landed FLAT on my ass. To my surprise, it didn't hurt quite like a bitch. It hurt like 5 bitches. It felt like I'd been fist-fucked by Edward Scissorhands. It felt like I was now 3 inches shorter than before I made questionable life choices. A couple onlookers heard my "OW, FUCK!" distress call and promptly dragged my assless remains back to the starting area. I didn't break anything, thankfully. It only hurt for a few days, and I was fine. However, I realized right then and there that maybe parkour is not my thing. I like being able to walk comfortably and unassisted. I haven't been back since, nor have I attempted any parkour-related stunts since then. And I have no intention to.
I’m so glad you weren’t seriously hurt! Also, your entire description was insanely HILARIOUS! I almost choked at “fist-fucked by Edward Scissorhands” 😂😂😂 Thank you for a well needed laugh today. You write so well and I hope you continue to do so because you’ve got talent! Thanks again ☺️
Tbh for someone who didn't know how to tuck and roll, but had to jump, he did the right thing. If he tried the tuck and roll he could have broken his back or skull
@MilesDaBurg brooooo this same kavetion guy come to penguinz0 channel and writes this same thing they he's better than penguinz0 in his comment section
It would explain how he could put up with the madness of the FNAF games for hours on end each day. Mark just dumped all exp points into Endurance and he just strong armed the RNG of the FNAF games until he beat the 20 modes.
He has a good spread through all of his stats, he just has a shit ton of buffs to his endurance thought items and quests. Such as breaking his ass, shoving his hand into a bee bush, and playing on a thin frozen lake.
New things learned: 1. Always bring a spare mattress if doing outdoor parkour 2. Never freak out if you hear police sirens 3. *Remember the time Mark broke his butt*
yeah the only reason why I don't listen to distractable is bc I'm autistic and so I need to be looking at something and seeing something (preferably colorful, like an animation) in order to focus on it
as someone who was VERY careful and cautious as a child because of my overprotective mother, these stories astonish me. I was always too afraid to make stupid life-threatening decisions like this so most of my injuries come from being clumsy lmao.
The fact that he not only fell, but did it because he 100% believed he was running from the cops is just the beautiful ribbon that ties this all together
Ah yes, the fractured-ass maneuver. Only the most intrepid of adventurers are capable of such a sophisticated feat. Clearly, mark performed this task flawlessly and should be appraised as such.
@@scoundral2995 I wanna bet everything, he clearly didn't know how to teach beginners and was really irresponsible not caring for Mark and the other guy who injured himself at all
I was only two seconds in and i was already in tears. This was the best 5mins and 9secs of my life. I haven’t had a good laugh like that in so long. Thanks Mark. What a Great story.
HOLD UP I immediately recognized your username from SKIT! way back in the day!! It's so good to see your content starting to thrive and seeing you verified and everything man 😭
I’m surprised by the lack of people commenting on how the police that were “after” them were probably the ambulance and first responders taking the first guy to the hospital.
When I first heard this story, i didn’t register that it was a parking garage so I wasn’t that scared hearing it originally, but seeing it animated really REALLY gets it through my skull the sheer stupidity of the whole arrangement and that mark is one lucky guy
I haven't laughed myself to literal tears in a long time, but man the delivery of this i god damned sobbed laughing. The build up, the delivery, the sheer dumb ass decisions made in the hubris of youth, oh my god. Oh man.
As someone who's actually broken my tailbone TWICE, the no pain at first Mark described is accurate. The pain doesn't come until the next day and it's a horrible feeling to wake up to
God you HAVE to listen to the WHOLE story on the distractible podcast man, there's So MANY gems clipped from this story. You totally cut out the part where Mark was COSPLAYING as a Parkour enthusiast, like ran out and bought the whole outfit just to show up for his first time. Also, the story that comes right after in this episode is so good.
Mark has too many stories where somebody get hurt then just walks away to some unknown location never to be seen again. There’s this, and the two stories with Mark and his brother the vine thorn pit, and the ice skating
You were lucky you didn't get paralyzed holy shit, cause I've seen people get paralyzed just from falling off their chair that's when you know you are the main character so lucky
I love waking up to Mark explaining how he broke his ass Edit: To those wonderin I did wake up late and a few minutes before the video posted. My sleep schedule is messed up so I wake up later
I love how this seems like a cycle. Every time, someone ends up leaving the group after breaking something jumping off a second story. I really want to know if it repeated for a third or fourth time.
@@1tankdestroyer778 I mean I'm surprised his ass did. Tho I watched that episode of distractible I don't know if he said happened to that kid that broke his ribs.
Did Mark ever think the siren was for the broken ribbed dude. Dang... the guy must have been in the hospital for months... Also, what if the final guy also got injured as the last person, and the parkour instructor decided to quit his job! XD
I've done parkour for a while and hearing this makes me both laugh my ass off and really mad at the same time . I really hope that dude who was supposed to "coach" you got hit by karma as hard as you hit your butt because THAT'S NOT how you introduce a newbie or an amateur at this discipline.
He probably WAS a newbie himself. And why does everyone talk about this karma? Do people actually believe in luck and karma and all that? It's brought up often.
The descriptions by Mark and the animation managed to hurt me physically, I had a huge pain sensation on the bottom of my back when he landed on the ground.
The only thing missing from this animation is where Bob comes back to their dorm and finds Mark lying on his bunk with a destroyed shoulder, fully decked out in Mirror's Edge parkour gear.
It astonishes me how Mark lived to adulthood, and keeps on living. This man must have just put every skill point into his endurance stat, as well as a couple extra lives on the side.
This reminds me of the time my friend somehow convinced me to try out parkour. He wanted me to jump over a wall for my first move, and after one demonstration I attempted it. He was hyping me up and telling me to walk further back. I was so pumped and broke into a sprint. I managed to somehow jump at the wrong time and slammed into the wall full force. He was silent, and I just stood in front of the wall internally screaming until he said we should go back inside.
Nothing like a funny and entertaining video made by Mark, oh the memories, this is what the king of fnaf is capable of, being this funny, props to the animators and mark for this quality piece of entertainment
When I heard this back in then I was like speechless. The first rule of parkour is not starting to jump everywhere reining your balance, is to know HOW TO FALL and how to use your feet and legs for maximum dampening of all the force your weight swings with. Damn, even in karate and in a circus, all acrobatics are learnt first knowing how to fall, roll, stuff to avoid falling flat on vital organs and joints. Mark lives in a lawless zone or he didn't care because he likes to feel pain on the run. Fun animation though.
Mark: People might mistake me for some sort of a masochist Also Mark: I jumped from two buildings two stories up on the same day and broke my ass and dislocated my shoulder
Also mark: Chica smash Also mark: owns body pillow of big vampire lady Also mark: proceeds to beat head with Amazon self defence product Also mark: I can take a trolley
@@mikeroconsole Also Mark: Goes for runs in the middle of the night in the darkest part of town with headphones in his ears playing zombie noises because it makes it more 'interesting.'
I can imagine the sheer horror and confusion of the parents of the dude that went after Mark when he starts explaining why he urgently needs to go to the hospital 💀
Shoulder roll is meant to slow the momentum when dropping so you don’t..we’ll you know.. have the sudden stop of the ground break your legs. The point of rolling isn’t style point, it’s so you can safely reach the ground. The faster you roll the less inpact your feet will have. But this doesn’t mean you should jump off the Empire State Building and expect the same treatment. As a graduated parkour student at HUB I can definitely say that rolling off that height will save you but will still hurt a bit. so there’s no cheating gravity, lol.
I've never parkoured before but I accidentally did a perfect roll once. I was heading down the backyard of my family's ranch if you can call it that, running a bit faster than I probably should've been because I was being impatient and just had to check on something. Well, I'm running and I end up tripping on something, probably a vine on the ground - might've been a snake or a twig, you know how it be on them southern ranches - and so I'm falling and every nerve in my brain just said "This is ridiculous. I just want to check what's got the dog riled up. I'm falling? No. I'm not falling. I'm gonna keep going." And so I fell and just THREW my weight into my shoulder and rolled so passive aggressively that the momentum carried me back onto my feet.. and I just kept going. More annoyed at the inconvenience of tripping than I was of falling. And I don't think I could replicate it if I tried..
When my uncle was a teenager he could do front flips with a running start. My dad and them knew a guy who could do *standing* front and back flips, apparently his leg muscles were _massive._ Anyway my dad is a martial artist, training since he was very young and my uncles flips were getting a bit stiffer over time. My dad tried to get his little brother to start stretching but was ignored. One day my uncle missed and landed firmly on his tailbone. The shock knocked him unconscious and he cracked the bone. He never did another flip for fear of another butt bone injury.
Having the breath knocked out of you is one of the most terrifying feelings there is. First there is the shock and panic of having just fallen and then you are trying to gasp for air but your body won't let you breathe at all, truly awful.
bro I fell trying to wash a golf cart and got the wind knocked out of me, I legit only made it worse because I was laughing so hard it sounded like "HA_HAHAGYSHG--HAHAHkl;hjlkj;flasd."
"I got this." - Markiplier, said about something he most assuredly does not have. Followed by the sequel: "I know what I did wrong last time." - Markiplier, clearly not learning his lesson
I don't think he ever learns lessons, he just remembers them. And then once he does something wrong he remembers that he did it wrong before. Like playing rage games, for example.
so, I've done tumbling in Martial Arts, which is tucking and rolling, and him talking about landing on his shoulder reminded me of when I was doing it for a demonstration practice, with all of my classmates around me, and i go and land on my shoulder heard one singular pop, then ringing, then got up went back in line to go again and the ringing stopped. All of the sudden, i felt nothing but pain in my shoulder, and turns out i had broken my Clavicle (collarbone) and i will say that it SUCKS, you are not allowed to move your arm AT ALL.
My favorite part of this episode is when Bob asks Mark if they ever saw the other dude (dude that landed on his face) again, and Mark took a second, and said "No...". Then all three of them assumed that he was completely and totally dead.
I haven’t heard many stories of people trying parkour for the first time and getting injured, so hearing this and seeing it animated is a masterpiece Edit: I got like 2 notifications for someone liking my comment lmao. Glad all of you feel the same
Now we know why Mark and Felix are successful. They both have broken their asses. I surmise that Sean too has broken his ass and he's just not telling us. The three Assmigos.
At this point, I'm convinced Markiplier is either: 1: A reincarnated Olympian God who is constantly facing struggle/injury, only to return unharmed, perhaps stronger. 2: A missing member of the cast of Jackass, who still thinks the show is running 3: A guy who just has no real sense of hurt/bodily harm, so overestimates confidence before a stunt or joke, leading to injury 4: Scorpius from Farscape if he weren't an alien- i.e. a masochist or 5: Just straight-up accident prone
