The irony is that she spent her single years not “living” looking on the other side of marriage-now she’s married not “living” looking at singles. Just enjoy life in whatever stage of life you are
That was one of my first thoughts too but upon reflection perhaps it is totally to be expected, the young woman who was never taught how to value herself and her life, and then spent 20 years exhausting herself for others (and not having the time to reflect) under that same belief is only now having a realisation… to be honest it makes a lot of sense… I hope that she does start taking time for herself and healing whatever caused this belief, her life is far from over and she can reclaim that time now! Stepping into herself will be even greater service to her daughters and I hope more women from that generation and beyond start reclaiming their lives now! They deserve it! 💫😊
@@RaisedByMettle Every kind of life looking through certain lenses can appear miserable or can look great. The important thing is to find the magic in where YOU are
@@RaisedByMettle Its in the Bible. So I believe it was God’s idea, and it was good. The idea was that if you are with the same man, then he would take care or you, provide for you and keep you safe. If you sleep with a bunch of different men, then whose job would that be? None of them would do it. Sadly, I have been with the same man and even he won’t do it. So I guess I kind of see your point. I’m still going to follow what the Bible says. But today, it does seem like women have to do way more than their share of providing and protecting themselves. Which is sad.
@@RaisedByMettlein my opinion some cultures and religions present marriage like it’s the best and most prestigious thing that a women can do. Like it’s the only important part of a woman’s life. I’ve seen churches celebrate marriages from the stage and not graduations, business ownership or other noteworthy accomplishments. It’s presented in such a cringeworthy way, and if you have no sense of self, I feel like it leads to internalization.
@@DottiebondsI graduated a while ago and marriage has never been something I care about. It has always looked boring to me. So no not all women. At the end of the day destiny is in your hands and you have to choose for yourself and don’t allow for society to dictate your happiness.
Not just young women. I strongly believe young men should do the same. It is vital that EVERYONE try being alone with themselves for at least 2-3 years. This way, you are made to learn more about yourself and what you want and expect out of life. I essentially spent 5 years in solitude, having to look at myself in the mirror. Some days, I loved what I saw, and other days, I hated what I saw. I was forced to think of the past and think of how I want my future. I was forced to look at my flaws and my perks. It was a rough ride, but thanks to that solitude, I have a STRONG foundation of self-love. I know what I want for myself, and I am FULLY aware of my own flaws. It is sometimes VERY scary to be alone, but if you hope to conquer your inner demons, you must do it. I recommend making sure you have friends, though, that you can socialize with outside of the solitude as sometimes you can go deep into the hole. Friends and families can help pull you out if you go too deep. I promise that if more people are comfortable being alone with themselves and to look at themselves in the mirror.....it would be a real game changer. You can't expect to make someone else happy until you are happy with yourself. It takes time, and it will cost you tears, but the payoff is indescribable. I wouldn't trade those years of solitude for anything.
@@isaa8521 couldn’t agree more! I chose traveling and following my wildest desires after graduation. marriage to me seems like modern slavery. Only do it under the right circumstances 😁
I encourage people to stop using SM as a tool to dig deeper holes of depression for themselves. 🕳️ She should stop watching single women’s content until she is emotionally healthier. ❤
Right, SM always shows a well curated life. They don't show the struggles that come with every phase of life. No one has a perfect life and it makes no sense to compare your life to another's.
But why? Clearly she’s been feeling suppressed subconsciously. Sometimes it takes others to see something in yourself, that has been buried deeply. It’s all about how you choose to respond. Pressure makes diamonds. That woman now has the chance to do inner work, and make change for her life. It’s a win.
Is SM single mother because she said single people…not once did this lady say single mother y’all just hear what you guys want to hear…being a single woman with no kids especially during these times is a beautiful alternative…
Listen, I was talking to my home girl today and she said herself, she doesn't feel like dating. Like why? It's become pointless now because of how these men act.
You know those women who are your friends until they get a bf… they get married and become this creator. If you think your single life is just you waiting for a man, you’re definitely not ready for marriage cause you’ll get sucked in and lose your whole individuality in someone else
And the tragedy for women is that men never lose themselves in marriage. The evidence is in their marital status. Women in the patriarchy are seen as nothing. Men remain MR. even after marriage. In the past, a woman was literally called by her husband first and second names, example: Mrs. John Smith. Yet women keep glorifying a system that treats us like animals
I'm about to live my life, I thank the men for not choosing me to be their slave. If one does choose me, I don't want to do nothing 😂 I want a chauffeur, body guard, maid, chef, nanny etc. If he not coming like that I don't want him!
I feel the same way! I married @26 widowed by 30. I spent my youth looking for my husband never feeling complete til I had somebody because I was conditioned to be chosen. Well in an instant it was all gone and I only had myself again. I had to learn that I was enough! That my life wasn’t going to be dictated by my singleness and tbh maybe God was sparing me from a life I thought I wanted but knew nothing about. Because now 6yrs after my husband’s death I have a career and a life I am proud of. I went back to school got 2 degrees. I look at my friends dealing with cheating/broken husbands and ungrateful kids while I sleep in travel and work on accumulating wealth for retirement and I’m very happy with my life ❤
@Tiaratisha, thank you for that. I needed to hear that. For a long time I pictured myself married to a good man cause I'm a good woman and have always treated boyfriends great while I didn't get that same treatment. But maybe God is saving me from something I know nothing about..Thank you for that❤
Comparison is stealing your joy. Figure out what you want to do and do it. You want to travel ,plan it and do it. You want to go out after work with your co workers, do it. There is a solution to most problems, just because you are married does not mean you cannot take care of yourself. You cannot change the past, you cannot predict the future, SO LIVE IN THE PRESENT.
Enjoy your life where you are. Don’t let your parents or society dictate what your life should look like as a woman. Freedom of choice is everything and that comes with independence.
Exactly. Parents are the last people to listen to. Respect them by all means but politely and respectfully explain to them that each generation's experience is completely different and people shouldn't pretend otherwise. Most importantly, the young must bear in mind that parents are not going to be around forever and shouldn't insist on making decisions which will affect a life that they won't be able to support. You don't want to end up struggling with an outdated life with no support. Parents and society won't be there when you are all alone dealing with the rubbish they pushed you into.
I have gotten to the point where I absolutely appreciate that I have not endured some of the marriages I’ve witnessed… Singlehood feels very good most days…Sometimes, when men approach me.. or a DM 🙄all it does is remind me why single is better. These men are wholly uninspiring…
Am 25 years old, I finished high school, started college, got my first degree then went for my honors degree. I have always wanted to study, get a good income and travel the world. When i graduated for my honors degree which is my second degree, I realized that my 20s are literally going while am stuck in school😂and so I decided to start traveling, I am originally from South Africa, am now in the US, i want to go study in Europe or Asia next and also maybe work there. I have legit told myself that i am going to travel and live the rest of my 20s like I've always dreamed. I don't want any regrets whatsoever.
Well done dearest. It is great to see this in the younger generation. I have been worried about you all when I saw extremely disturbing anti women content by Redpillers. I wondered how this was affecting young women. There is nothing more superior and powerful in the world than an empowered woman. She is the ultimate powerful force in the world. She will empower the next generation so what could be bigger. They say when you educate a woman, you educate the whole family. I am proud of you. Just make sure a man doesn't come in and steal your power. If you decide to get involved with a man, let him add to what you already are, not reduce. Be careful of men who want to reduce you to the submissive wife. Men never get reduced to anything when they marry. They get positive things added to them instead. Aim for the same dearest
@@KurosakiLuvar01you gotta remember the era she's from. She's 52 and It was insane not to think as she did back then. She was taught that it was insane not to marry as soon as possible.
That's not what she's saying. She's saying she didn't realize or was taught that being single was an option and completely normal. She's saying that if she could do it all over she would've stayed single.
@@biblethumper8088did you listen to what she said? She said she was waiting till she got married to live her real life. So to her being single wasn't a real life. Now that she's married and tired she realizes that marriage is not a piece of cake. As women, we need to enjoy life married or single.
I’m 37, 2 kids, never married. I never truly lived life before I had my first kid. I didn’t even know who I was yet. So I used up all my time as a mom making mistakes because I really wanted to live free. I have so many regrets. I wish I would have did better with my life before kids. I like seeing young black women live life and not focus on finding a man/husband. Men aren’t going anywhere. You gotta be happy alone first and heal from any childhood trauma before dating at all.
I never held myself back during my single hood but the pressure to get married and have child definitely pushed me to make poor relationships choices. Now that I’m back in single hood, I don’t fear it like I did before because I’m much happier on my own than to settle with a man who is not going to add to my life.
my mother had us before she lived her life. as a result, we had a very codependent and enmeshed relationship in which she took ownership of all of my grade school accomplishments. once i started hitting career milestones as a young adult and fought for my own identity outside of her, I felt a lot of jealousy from her. she started putting me down when I’d tell her about big accomplishments, which was confusing because she had always been my biggest supporter growing up. eventually i stopped going to her altogether. all that to say, i want a child one day and ive vowed to go after and accomplish all that i want in life so that i will never envy the opportunities awarded to my child. i want to take my child with me and it is my hope that they go even further than i will because i will have god willingly laid a foundation for them to do so. 💕
in relation to the video, i want to look at the tiktok of thirty years in the future and see girls living their lives and instead of envying them, relate and recall my good memories of a life well lived. God willing!
I am single. And I decentered men. I stopped dating. I stopped dating apps. I stopped posting thirst traps. I stopped crying about being lonely. I chose to go to therapy. And I realized that the only reason I want someone in my life is because the bills are hard to pay alone. I decided to start looking at ways to budget, save, and earn money. I can tell you being single is not for everyone. But I can say for me. It works. I enjoy my alone time. I enjoy coming home and only taking care of myself. I enjoy a quiet peaceful home. I enjoy taking care of only myself. Am I lonely. Not really. I have good friends and my family. And I spend alot of time with them. If I need to share a meal with someone I go cook at my daughter’s home or go out to eat.
@@Lizarddqueen79 that's patriachy projection thrusted into us since young age. We all deprograme at different stage in ourlives, glad you found your way.
@@Cateyes767Sorry but 52 is not at all old in terms of patriarchal programming. It all depends on the family you come from. I am almost 60 and am African yet don't have a patriarchal bone in my body but for my religious fundamentalist brother. I wasn't brought up to believe in marriage. In fact valuing marriage over education and a job was frowned upon. Self sufficiency was seen as the ultimate goal because my father had not been able to support us and life had been nothing short of hellish as a result.
@@the8thchurch461true. Some people choose to live by those outdated ideas and beliefs even when there is overwhelming evidence that it's not a good idea.
@@omphilemoerane2569Indeed dearest. Some people never learn. Some are even worse than worse and just the worst. I know of someone whose father had abandoned the family for another woman. The girl simply refused to learn. When I told her that I was pursuing high education, she said it was a waste of time. She proceeded to get married young at 22 and immediately started a family. It wasn't long before she showed up with a black eye because the husband had beaten her. The marriage didn't last and she moved to husband no. 2. Ah well, you cannot save everyone.
She honestly just sounds unhappy all around. She needs to consider therapy and find out why she’s always unsatisfied. People take having a family for granted way too easily because of social media nowadays.
I think marriage is not the end all be all. I believe in the idea that your spouse should be your partner and friend… Instead of thinking about the what ifs she should think about what she could do for herself. If her kids are old enough to care for themselves enough she can let go the reigns to her spouse and have some time to herself… at least demand it… I feel like if marriage doesn’t add to your journey for peace or happiness what’s the purpose?
I think because single now and single 10 years ago is wayyyyyyy different. 10years ago there was nothing to do but be with someone... now people travel more, people go out more. Having a husband isn't a "flex" anymore. Life is just way different now.
Plus, it's just as expensive (if not MORE) being with someone else as it is being single. It's absolutely more expensive being with someone else if you have children.
There was plenty to do 10 years ago. Social media wasn’t as popular as it is now, but a lot of the same events and activities we have today were available 10 years ago, especially if you live in or near a major city and were over the age of 21.
@@blanketthecat3586@blanketthecat3586 nothing to do msy have been exaggerated, but s lot has definitely changed since then regarding traveling and just relationships.... the fact that you are on this video is my point.
@@ultravioletmix3310 years changes a lot... I can't even imagine life or relationships in another 10... I exaggerated 10 years. But I'll just speak for me and my surroundings.....being in a relationship and having kids was definitely the thing to do...my little sister and her crew don't even want kids now... I see a difference around me I guess. People are more focused o. Education and living life.
So she married late is still stupid? Girl bye...I can't imagine being single all that time and thinking that wasn't a "real" life. You only get the one. So every minute counts.
She probably was with a man the whole time/never single for too long. She could have gone to shows, travel, go to school, but probably was strapped to a man's side. Most people didn't/don't have the grit to march to beat of their own drum. I'm glad to be a millenial I was born in a generation who freed itself from all the archaic constructs society has forced on us for too long
she was too caught up in finding a husband b/c she allowed herself to be programmed by society and now realizes she missed out on a lot of life instead of just enjoying each moment. Tragic
Comparison is the thief of happiness. If you're true to yourself and your own desires, you won't be envious of others. I'm married 17 years as well. I don't compare myself to single women, and the most happiest I've been is raising my children.
Girl what were you doing in your 20s? I was single all my 20s, and I’ll be getting married this year at 33. I’ve lived my life. I traveled, brunched with the girlies, enjoyed the nightlife, dated, got my heart broken, went to school, got a career, lived on my own for several years. I’ve experienced life and not sure I’d want to go back to that. Perhaps she should create some hobbies outside of her family.
I’ve been married for YEARS and as much as I love the single girls living their best life content, I don’t envy it at all. Stop comparing yourself to other people, especially people on SM only showing the highlight reels
I am also married and don't get what there is to envy? if you are married to the right person, marriage is incredible! and a wonderful bond to experience.
It' not hard to understand. Society pressures girls/women into relationships and after a certain age, not being partnered is seen as a measurement of our worth, value and morality. There is a reason that men and women are out here promoting men to be in age gap relationships with women young enough to be my daughter (if I had her at 20). There is a reason why women's bodily autonomy is being stripped and chipped away at to almost nothing in this country. If you're a happily married woman or a married woman at all, my hats off to you. I opted out a decade ago. Too much work and I'd rather put all the nurturing and creativity I have into myself.
@@TijaunaK Yes that’s great we all have our own separate lives whether we’re married or single and we can all be happy or unhappy. And we can all have our individual struggles. just because I am married, doesn’t mean I’m struggling and. Unhappy and that’s the same vice versa for single women. Sometimes I just see no balance in these conversations.
@@TijaunaK like I said in my original comment, I’m happy for the single girls living their best life, so hats off to you! I don’t envy what others have going on bc I’m happy with what I have going on. I feel everyone should do the same, single or married.
I married at 19, divorced 9 years later…I’m actually glad I married young and found out I should have followed my instincts and left his ass where I found him😂😂😂 but I’ve been living my very best life ever since. He happened to see me out shopping one day and called me immediately saying I looked like I was miserable. 😩 I didn’t have the heart to tell him I was looking like that because the dress I was looking for was gone!! Boy leave me alone. He really thought I was going to run back to his slow ass. Anyway ladies live ya life, they will suck the life out of you and blame you for it all. You could not pay me to marry again!! Get the cat 🐈 or the 🐶 puppy. 😂😂😂
As a person who was married for ten years and felt just like her, my heart hurts for her. I think society makes women feel bad about being single. I pray she finds serenity and peace in her life. I still desire marriage but also love myself and know who I am. I am spending this time getting my life in order. There is a time for everything!
Sending love to this married woman for the humility and maturity to admit her insecurity. It takes honesty and that should never be shamed in this world. I am proud of us single ladies living it up. For too long we have been single shamed by women in relationships.
I’m forever being shamed by married women and women in relationships, thinking their above me for being ‘chosen’. I don’t even hang around with taken women anymore only single women or lesbians. The funny thing is they think I’m jealous of them but their husband or man isn’t the type I’d wanna be married to anyway 😅
@@shanicrystal8671Sorry you have to deal with that. I can never understand why married women think they are superior to single women. It is laughable because their men make them walk through hoops. It is a rarity for a man to be pro women. They are mainly sexist but I mustn't paint them all with the same brush. Still....
Unfortunately that’s marriage in a nut shell I’ve noticed for ladies , it’s simply not enough balance for the wives and mothers as soon as your married, People men and ladies scream at you you’re married you can’t do that , don’t think of having a baby people want you to give up every hope and dream, wish ,sex appeal , carefree energy honey it’s sad and men never give up anything besides the financial aspect of being married other than that they get to remain Bros and have friends go on fishing trips and golf trips .. it’s easy for a married woman to get depressed I seen it too many times
@@Mystika777You are definitely not alone. As women, we are socialized to become mothers from the very beginning. Think about how boys got to play with science kits, but the toys designed for little girls are baby dolls and kitchen sets. We are literally programmed to be misguided. Anyways, being a mom is extremely challenging and you need a break. Give your kids to your husband, and tell him you need a self care weekend. Go to the spa and get pampered❤️
I have a question. How can marriage be a goal? To me anything that involves someone else will be almost impossible to accomplish. Men decide if they want to get married, so how can women have that as a goal? I understand you can do certain things to be “chosen” but still it doesn't guarantee that you will get married. I'm happy for people who are happily married, but I think we need to be very careful with sitting and waiting to accomplish the “goal” of marriage.
@@aboutthatlife1418because people don't understand that marriage is a business. If your lifestyle is not going to improve after getting married then there is no point in you doing it. Only get married if it means you're going to have more money in your account, going to live in a better neighborhood, bigger house, drive a better car, go on more vacations, your kids will go better schools otherwise why do it? 😂
This isn’t every married women’s story. This is sad though! There are married women with kids that are happy and I think people hear her story and think that this is universally how married women think and it’s not. I feel for her though.
Idk man. Seems like she's doing the same thing now that she did when she was single: coveting the fantasy of what she doesn't/didn't have. Take a look around and see where you are right now. Is it perfect? No. It won't be. It NEVER is. But can you find happiness where you are? You make decisions in life and you have to make the best of them. Comparing your life to others and, worse, to what others are putting online is ONLY going to make you unhappy. If you want to be content in YOUR LIFE, look at YOUR LIFE. What small changes can you make that are practical and will make a difference in the long wrong? Being run ragged with chores? Include the kids or work out a chore chart with the hubby. Not feeling loved? Set aside a two hour window a week to just spend alone with the hubby. Have no time for yourself? Make it happen where you can, even if it's just knitting on your lunch break. Work with what you've got and change what isn't working.
I just think this lady, if and when she gets a divorce, we’ll see her back talking about how much she misses her husband… Some people just aren’t ever happy, always waiting for the next best thing
I had to thank my mother for never pressuring me for children or to be married. I never realized the gift of freedom she set me up for. I'm 45 and my body can still have kids but I'm good. I also am good on being lawfully married to anyone. I'm a free bitch baby!
She’s beautiful! Honestly, I think if someone is going to get married, it should be with someone that wants what you want. Meaning, they want to travel, have a maid, living a certain lifestyle. Idk, as someone that doesn’t want marriage or kids, it’s not that hard to live the life that you want lol. If you’re living for others, then you will never be fulfilled.
Imagine her husband, her daughters... imagine them coming across her video... some things you just keep it to yourself, your close ones or your therapist.
@@rebekkagasmi9451 There's nothing wrong with her honesty. There's a whole a lot wrong with the channel she used to share it! Again, imagine her husband, her daughters... imagine them coming across her video...
She reminds me of an old friend who had all the milestones she needed to cross off her list but never seemed complete or happy.It's like they fantasized about a life they thought would naturally find them.College grad✅️,engaged and married by 27✅️...now for the monkey wrench thrown into her life. Hubby cheated 3 years later and had a kid. Now she divorced and depressed. Identity now nonexistent in her mind,decided to then get her crown back by becoming a mother. She got ivf by herself and now has 2 kids to give herself purpose. We stopped being friends . But this creator and her unhappiness in her life and wishing for better no matter her circumstances made me think of my old friend .
I feel her. She's tired from serving everyone, while no one is serving her. She wants to rest and be free of those responsibilities. I regret marriage and children too, but I take solace in teaching my children not to follow that path. Their fathers genealogy will not live on.
She had too many years to be sitting up here talking like this.. at 35 you didn’t have enough sense to marry a man who would provide you a life of peace??
I feel like people are always thinking the grass is greener on the other side. All shes doing to me is now swapping the place holding. Instead of making time for herself and enjoying herself which there are moms on tik tok who do the same thing, she is looking on longingly and miserably living in the past of what she could have done. Instead of DOING. Some people really want a family. Like your life is YOURS please live. Before now was the time the marriage and family. Now she has that and when she was single was the time. Girl please.
I really appreciate her video. I think sooooooo many women have done exactly what she describes - treating your single life as if it is an unimportant preamble to your Real Life of Wife and Mother - and are seething in resentment about it. Jealousy is uncomfortable,but at least she's aware of what it is and that it's about her choices and perspective, which she can change if she really wants to, not something that just happened to her. It sounds like she is really processing some big existential questions and she is brave to take it to Beyoncé's internet.
I always knew that I wanted to be single and on my own for a while after I graduated college and found employment. However, society, family and friends start to give you the side eye if you are approaching 30 and you're not married. I got married at 28. The ceremony lasted longer than the marriage.
I'm around that lady's sge. I am single. I lived my best life in my 20s, 30s, and 40s. People, even in my family, thought I was strange going out by myself. I went to shows, restaurants, and conferences by myself. I traveled around the country and a little outside wuthin the Western hemisphere. And I wasn't rich. I'm in a profession that isn't paid well in response to the education earned. I was living a "rich auntie" life before it was a thing. If anything, I have slowed down in my 50s because where I moved to with my famuly. But I had a good time.
She is describing life before social media. We really believed that your life starts when you get married. I will be forever grateful that my daughters have all this information. They will get to live the life I didn’t even know was possible at their age. That makes me happy
I can relate. I knew how she felt, and it's not the way to live your life. We were conditoned in the 80s that real life started after achieving the marriage goal. I'm deprogrammed, but it can take years! And teach our daughter's better this time around.
Seriously? As a married single wife, the worst part of it is how much my husband neglects me. I’m glad that I was single for a very long time before I met him even though people told me that I should get married young. Because even though I’m married, I still feel like I’m single. The only difference is that now my family hates me too. Well, in reality, they hated me the whole time, I just didn’t know it back then. I’m happy to be away from their toxicity. If you aren’t happy with your marriage, let your husband know and seek your own independence. What is he going to do about it? The only thing he can do is divorce you. And if he divorces you, then you will get singlehood, which is what you have always wanted.
She centered men in her life and viewed marriage as the beginning of her life and forgot to live and enjoy life. She still has time to live her life, but now she's worrying about the past. Ma'am live your life where you are, do the things that you want to do, is your husband not your partner or are you the bang maid, and if it's the latter, you have a different problem
This opened my eyes to other things. I’ve put my life on hold but not even for relationships but for more about not having the dream job yet or having the money I want yet. Time will fly regardless
I think they just married the wrong man. I almost got married to the wrong man and I know for sure I would be miserable right now, trying to find a divorce to have .
This is why you need to make the most of every season you find yourself in.. I’m currently single..and mid 30s. I pray marriage will happen for me and am I sad and lonely sometimes? Yes especially on saturdays but you best believe I am taking complete advantage of this season and stacking my coins ! If I’m gonna be an erm “mature” mom I better make sure I got enough coins to handle these kids
I have been in a relationship since I was 20. Got married at 25. Getting divorced now at 38. No kids. No true connection was established. I can say that I am much happier now. Traveling and having control of my time and my future. I think it’s important for us to love and know ourselves first
@@seekinghimdaily92 I see. The lady in the video also looks great. She could also pass for someone in their late 20s, especially as she is married and very likely has kids. You normally have married women being fat when they reach their 50s. So I suppose both women look great?
I'm 26 and I've started thinking about this but you also need to evaluate where you're at. I've been struggling with real shit that has me tired and sick, sometimes when I see videos of women with their family or kids it touches a fiber in my bones because I feel so lonely... Is not easy and that's what's making me feel/desire a family of my own. I think that's the issue.
Yeah, she needs to get the shingles vaccine as soon as she can safely get it after she recovers from the chicken pox. I had shingles, and it's not something I'd wish on *anyone.*
@@nemotheo1629 Chickenpox tends to be more severe in adults than children, and adults have a higher risk of developing complications. In reference to shingles, anyone who has ever had chickenpox (whether they get it as a child or as an adult) can get shingles, and anyone who has shingles can give chickenpox to anyone who hasn't already had chickenpox.
Marriage/relationship is not for everyone...just like single is not for everyone...honestly either way I'm fine...I love my own companion and my freedom and as long as the person I'm with, enhances my life and I theirs, I'm fine either way...I'm enough with or without someone.
9:40 I was definitely jealous of my single friends and the single mothers when I was married with children. I’m divorced and my children are adults. This is the best time in my life. I’m loving the freedom, girl dinners, the peace and no one sucking the life out of me.
Y’all this is why they say to work on yourself😅. And that you can’t love another without first loving yourself. My goal is most definitely to have a husband. In no way shape or form will I be caught dead with that as my *only* goal. And it only makes sense to me to want to be the best version of myself I can be before, during and after achieving that goal. That means living my life in all phases; keeping the future in mind but focusing on the present.
That's so sad and I feel bad for her. I absolutely did the opposite. I lived every day like it was my last, I did all the things, took the trips, danced on tables, swung from the chandeliers! I ate up my single years, got wined, dined, had all the fun. Now I'm married and have no regrets! I want to take more trips and have more fun with my husband, but differently, I miss nothing about the old days except the city we lived in. I did it till it was done. I'd encourage any young women who are reading this to live it up! Wear the dress, go to the party, take the trip, spend the coin. You'll be so much happier in your married life and you won't feel like you missed out.
I TELL MY KIDS ALL THE TIME ENJOY YOUR SELF DONT CHASE A MAN AND END UP WITH KIDS TO SOON...ITS NOT FOR EVERY WOMEN ... FIND YOUR SELF FIRST...IF U DONT YOU WILL BE UNHAPPY....
Married woman are saying the quiet part out loud. I can relate. Married women, especially those with children -ARE SO VERY JEALOUS OF SINGLE WOMEN. I've even had my own BIOLIGICAL sister say, in not so many words, THAT SHE IS JEALOUS OF ME! Wow! Yea - single ladies STAY WINNING! I love my single life. 🥰
@@taunyb5429 she literally said her own sister said it. Why you asking if she really believes that? She just said it. Just live your life and let people be.
Yes but also keep in mind that there are married women who are in healthy marriages with kids and love their life lol. All of us aren’t the same. I feel bad for the women that do though that’s rough.
@@liljessi90 ..FIRST OFF, were did I type "all of us are the same"? 😒😠 Let's NOT use selective ignorance, as if people ALWAYS have to say, some or most, otherwise you just assume the person means 'all'. Let's NOT play that childish game. When typing, make sure your words are accurate. Second, of course I know not everyone's situation is the same 😤🙄 - you sound unhinged for asserting that and implying I mean 'all' when I clearly DID NOT. THIRD, I deal in majority. MOST (close to ALL) married women are secretly miserable. Why? Because the western version of marriage is oppressive to women. A husband is a liability, not an asset to a woman. Being single is the fairytale - marriage is the nightmare (sugar-coated with phony smiles, and fake married bliss spouse-to-spouse-interaction). You don't know what goes on behind closed doors - so stop it. Statistics show that the most joyful time in a woman's life is when she's single (childfree is always the most joyful time for a woman, and is an ideal situation for her to obtain and maintain joy). Anyone going around showing images and videos, online, depicting their 'happy marriage', on social media or who show family and friends, offline 'happy married times' through her actions, with her husband, is lying to herself/others around her, and is living a LIE.
@@A1SoniaMOkay so I’m not reading all that. Stop being so aggressive girl. I’m not trying to attack you. Are you okay? I get where you are coming from but you are projecting a little maybe. Your thoughts aren’t reality for everyone. But I’m no longer interested in taking to you. Have a good day. I was only generally speaking and I feel like you took that as me coming at you and I wasn’t. You cant push your opinions onto people I had an awesome single life and I am having a great marriage with children. ☺️☺️☺️
This has given me amazing perspective as someone who desires marriage in particular. The thought of never finding that scares me but my peace and freedom in being single....there's nothing like it. Seriously, anything that disrupts my peace is an immediate ick and will get booted quickly, especially some man.
I am 41 and lived this single life she talks of throughout my 20s... It wasn't as easy back then as it is now. I was literally the ONLY one in all my friend group NOT obsessing over getting married and having children before 30. The only one! I was working hard and travelling and going to the theatre, etc, etc... BUT I largely had to do it all on my own. It was AWESOME in many ways, however, is not the same as we are seeing now when SO MANY young women are choosing to live this kind of life and can move in packs and have an AMAZING time together. I had decided, when I was younger that I probably did not want to marry or have kids, so in my head, THIS was my life and I was going to live it. Which is why I think it was easier for me to hit the ground running. I think it is easier to live this kind of life if mentally, you are actively challenging traditional roles. This is also where many young women are now, psychologically, you're just in a different place to someone who is HOPING that love will find them.
Hi 👋🏽 Destiny I love ❤️ what you said about enjoying having your bed to yourself on vacation 😅! Yes 🙌🏽 Sis me too! I always reserve a KING sized bed on vacation 😅
