Men Fall In Love (DIFFERENT From Women)! John Gray (Full Interview) 

Yesss...I wish someone I know listen to this

Thank you for posting this

Ive heard that , as you get older , 50s on up ,that men testosterone goes down and estrogen goes down in women. Can you explain this please , thank you

Yes . . Brittney I also wish someone I know can listen to this too .. ...🤔

It's such a beautiful thing to do being in a marriage!

How beautiful is that 🤗🌻♥️💕

That’s great for you …. Congratulations…. What about if you’re husband doesn’t do any thing wonderful for you ever ? 🤷🏻‍♀️

@@bucklr11 if you're living together, there must be SOMETHING you can find to be grateful about. Even if it's taking out the garbage or making just his side of the bed. The more you express thanks and gratitude to him for the little things (no matter how small), the more he'll want to do for you!

Adding here: it wasn't always something he DID for me, sometimes it was just something I like or love about his personality. Or even something he did for someone else, that I admired. You can always find something to appreciate if you're looking for it!

I never saw any of that…But it sure sounds nice! My parents divorced when I was 5. I know I’m not special, but it was traumatic. Worst of all, my kids ended up the same way; despite my best efforts, I divorced when they were little, too. It’s not what I planned. But life doesn’t go according to plan.

@@smartmarketing173 you were and are special .. sorry that you went through a divorce at a sweet age of 5 and that your kids did as well..

@@winniejohnson5559 Oh, come on. It si cheap and worn out and does not help at all.

@@smartmarketing173 Learn fr ur mistakes in past relationships.

Your childhood environment will determine how your own adult relationships evolve. This is so lovely. Men like this will automatically bring out the feminine. Unfortunately, there aren't many of these around. So then, should we be questioning parenting skills and the environment they set as a family? I wish all children to be brought up in a loving environment, not only to them (which is usually where parents think the focus is important to be) but adults to each other. A couple of examples, parents that divorce think that they are doing right, so long as they take responsibility for the children. Maybe in this situation, this is the best that can be done, but this effects children greatly, and into adulthood. Another example, my neice sometimes tells the dad to go away, but never to them mum, and I sometimes can't help but think she learnt this from her mum and her home environment. At 2 years old, they adopt all adult behaviours.

too much work s*icide is less of a hustle

@@sarafernandez4920 dunno what to say really but ig I have finally accepted that men come in such biology only and its only better if I accpet it sooner and try to navigate around it in the best possible manner but come to think of it boy oh boy you are not wrong 😔

Too much work to just please a man and in the end he'll just lose interest... I'd rather stay single 🙂

Thank youu

@@jissoo777 Also, is full of male bullshit. I was like 🙄🙄🙄🙄 at most of it.

My soul mate, shows me love by giving up his time to help me 💖✌ time is priceless

That's because his love language is gifts. You need to look up the five love languages. Sometimes spouses don't speak the same language

so if you want gold jewelry if will show up 3 months later?

That is very thoughtful

Sounds like you have a great husband, you're lucky.

A lot less feeling inferior and rejected due to our physicality

The problem is many come from abusive, dysfunctional and hopelessly broken homes, and some women just give up altogether, because it feels like no matter what you do, it always ends up bad for the women and children. Better alone than abused.

@Heidi Misfeldt Wow Heidi, so right on. I'm 70, and just hearing for the first time!! Nurse here, just met a pilot ...instant connection. Both thought each other way younger, excellent health, active. But see that I'm trying too hard to please him...need to expect that he wants to nurture and please me. Ask more, give less, but in wise incremental steps. Never too old to learn for sure. Been on my own 20 years, better to continue myself, than to coddle and serve without reciprocity. A new paradigm in my thinking!! Wow!!!

it should be taught at home. Let's start now...

Great idea!!

Game! Who needs the flattery.

Too long and boring

Not exactly

Sometimes.

Same as woman. When he is leaving woman fell in love.

So well said.... If your their in front of him ...their not interested or lost intrest....or were never interested in the first place (we just dont know) BUT THE MINUTE THEY THINK YOUR... NOT HAVING ANY OF THIS / HIS BS AND... THEY CAN ""SEE THE BACK OF YR HEAD"" (as your walking away) then everything changes (in his mind) Its all mind games with them they can never "just say" what they mean or show what they feel it's really not that hard guys...

Thank God they don't teach this in school! Women need to learn to take care of themselves the way they take care of men.

The bigger crime is not learning at home....but thank God for the free exchange of information here!

@@BitsyBee Exactly! You learn these things at home not school. More than likely from school is disinformation.

They don’t teach anything important in schools. The goal is to destroy the family unit and therefore society so that they can be in charge of the masses.

They teach gender is a social construct in schools now. Thats certainly gonna help

What was your new phrasing may I ask?

What was your old and new phrasing may I ask? Your comment reads like "I found the secret to a happy relationship! Good luck figuring it out on your own, suckuhs!✌️"

AMEN AND AMEN, LOL!!! :)

So much more peaceful

Love that same here can i borrow that

I kind of feel the same way

Spot on

This is true, but men don't HAVE to undestand women because many women have low standards and will take what they can get. There is a great push to get women to lower their standards even lower than they already are so men won't have to step up and do better.

Ye and the fact that they SERIOSLY think that we are some robots with the same programmed behaviors always surprise me. I can't belive how many times I had to say "You do realise we are human beings just like you are right?"

Same thing with women. Men are different not all are the same.

@@rainbow9987sorry buy men are basically the same, sex sex sex 😂

I am blessed to have an excellent friendship with a homosexual man. In our most recent conversation, he openly warned me to distance myself from a man whose best friend is, to put it bluntly, a control freak. He's taking advice about women in general and about me in particular from someone whose ideal woman is one who follows two steps behind, with her head down, and who keeps silent in church. After blowing two marriages of his own, interfering in the significant relationship of the man I left alone for several years out of respect for a union in which I played no part and had no right, and am anticipating the time when his daughter takes up with this reprehensible creep, I am through with men. Catch me if you can, guys, but remember. I am definitely worth having. The question is, are you?

There's an old, old saying: The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

Exactly!! agree with you 100%

Time wounds all heels. Especially in a marriage.

motivations can be important also sorry i side with Freud on this one

Brains think and hearts love and actions speak louder than words....Make sure not to get the three of them them mixed up. Red flags are very important so don't ignore the sign along the road that clearly reads: DEAD END !!! ONE YOU'VE DECIDED TO JUMP OFF A CLIFF, THERES NO COMING BACK...YOU OBVIOUSLY DIE AND THAT'S DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPILY EVER AFTER....

@ Lana Muir , so he was married to another woman? WOW!! so where was the Blessing in this relationship? Please know I'm Definitely not judging at all,

So… you were having an affair?

Thank you so much for this comment and beautiful perspective. It lifted my spirits so much!!! You are so blessed ❤️💕

Let's not assume she was having an affair. There are plenty of reasons why people that love each other are not together.

@@walkingbyfaith5504 oh yes you are.

I can see your POV. It’s a shame because social media should facilitate dialogue

@@mompreneurmentor I agree. It should... but it unfortbunately doesn't. I believe its an unintended Consequence stemming from competition.

Then I am definitely not interested in you! I need a smart articulate man who knows how to communicate! And yes there are men who can communicate and are articulate! And I am willing to wait for that man. Prosecuting attorneys know how to convey their points. Professional communicators know how to ask questions and answer questions! I’ve dated both for a good chunk of time so these men are out there if that’s what kind of man you are looking for 😉

Not at all. The minimalizing of our gender differences is absolutely deliberate and intentional. Perhaps not every person who is engaging in this socially destructive activity is fully aware of the harm that it is causing, but the puppeteers behind this agenda most certainly are. This is totally ruinous to relationships and the cohesion of the typical nuclear family. It has created women that are mentally unstable and men that are weak and feminine. Over 60% of single women who identify as Democrat have used some sort of prescription drug in the past 6 months, and 25% of women overall have used an anti-depressant in that time. Adult men possess 20% less testosterone than they did 30 years ago and 30% less than 50 years ago. Men, in particular, seem to be "dropping out" of society. They appear to be giving up on attending college, dating and even working. We are heading towards a demographic crisis because people are no longer having kids in the western world. People have become less independent and more willing to turn over control to the government to run their lives in the West.

Agree

Thank you hard to see how much Hate women have for men on these comments like Men are incapable of commitment. Im having all the described issues for men. With women! They dont want to commit they want to be floosey. Its bizarre

Thank you. This video was giving me a nervous breakdown.

Avoidant men, emotionally unavailable men, commitment phobic men are NOT relationship material for any self respecting woman who seeks a mutually satisfying relationship. They literally cannot attach in any healthy or meaningful way.

@@Mitchnels There are women also who have avoidant attachment style, equally dislike commitment, contiuous closeness and interdependence. It is not good or bad, but they value independence above all and have a critical, dismissive nature, which makes them hard to live with...

Man's ego? Or need for testosterone?

I’m sorry. But men don’t need their ego boosted. Nobody should have their ego boosted. People need to be less egoistic, not more

@@blackswan4486 I highly doubt Jeana was going for that angle. She likely wasn't saying that men need to hear "Ooh yes, you're such a manly man. So strong and handsome. The best lover. You're so special and every women wants you." She was more likely saying that it's good to acknowledge his attempts at kindness and romance, like if he performs a kind gesture or goes out of his way for you, to thank him and acknowledge him, to respect and appreciate that he took time out of his day to think of you and do something for the sole purpose of making you smile. Something as simple and basic as taking out the trash -- a simple "Thank you" can go a long way and make him feel like you do notice and appreciate him.

Not sure I agree with you. I personally like to have occasional validation or approval maybe ever couple of weeks.

Is your husband a Leo?

These kinds of stereotypes are what causes a breakdown between genders. It's much better to seek to understand each other than deal with universal assumptions. Men would also say "women always think they're right". So where do we move on from there? Best to stop with the universal assumptions and blame games and rather treat people as individuals (on both sides of course). Some women are good, some are bad, some men are good, some are bad. Depends on the individual

Yup we can just get to know each other and take it from there. It’s easy to see if you are growing bc respected and if not get out asap. Love can’t replace respect. You can’t fake respect it’s there or it isn’t. If I was dating a guy like the examples of men preaching videos in the video I would not last one minute. Anyone saying women don’t heed respect and Jen don’t need love is gaslighting and you should walk away.

​@aqua3418 both perspectives are true. 😊

I think it s also due to mature level and life experience!! Only selfish immature ppl never grow up. At the end of the day, two ppl should learn about each other and try to be there for each other. It’s the whole point to have a partner, isn’t it?!

I read men are from Mars amd women venus. Eye opening too

I have had guys bond for 3-6 months and ghost after sex

Umm, no. Simply expressing that ‘I’m stressed, going through something and need time’, would have cleared any assumptions. I hate how we patty cake men in today’s society, but tell women to toughen up when it comes to how we deal with emotions in relationships. Or make it’s just something that BW go through.

Eye opener indeed.

Are you an Aquarius?

@@bhumikavimal 🤣🤣🤣lmao

@@bhumikavimal why is that so?

me too! But I'm 53 and I have low tolerance for neediness, care giving , stroking of egos etc. If a man isn't strong, confident, secure, I don't think I could be in a relationship. I know I will never marry again but it would be fun to date someone fun and easy. May not happen!

@@lisahileman6727 Two words; younger men.

Awww thats so nice. I wished my bf would be more open and vulnerable with me

@Marie Jones The Persian culture is not the same as Arabic Islamic culture - I don't know a single Iranian who suppressed his wife- that's only politics and Islam which had been brought to Iran when the Sha left . There used to be freedom for women

@@nellymiller7669 My husband also says what he's thinking and feeling. No filters. I tend to be assertive as he is. [I have probably been more hurtful, saying 'F-u' for something he said earlier this week...but it was over something ridiculous (grounded in humor) and not a serious subject.] I would have to say it's not cultural as much as it is we are all individuals and we just need to toe the line, knowing ourselves so we know what we want from others and maintain good boundaries to maintain our self-esteem.

@@nellymiller7669 💯. Persian is not Arabic. Does not equal Islam. Unfortunately, many people do not realize how Iran was before that 1970s or 1980s.

@@leighannjohnson1194 exactly

Sooo true!!

Yep! That is my experience, too. It can sometimes be difficult to find sexual passion for your ‘’son’’

This is true.

Works both ways

@@deborahedelman2659 NOT

Sorry you went through that. Hold onto the great love your Mum showed you and the Joy that must have brought her ro have you kids .

I always love to hear a man's perspective on men and the way they think. As women, we are different in our perspectives and perceptions on things many times, yet at other times we meet and think very similar

Me too. Ive hurt myself with my soulmate and lost him. Then i read John Greys book (because my dad has it). And i realize why i screwed up MY relationship with my soul mate lover. And also opened my eyes to my parents relationship. Now i am with a good healty man, just recently showed him his book and read together, now looking forward marriage!

@@inspirespider66 how did you screw up?

I think she didn’t screwed up, it’s more like that she has found the right man because she lost the wrong one.

What's his name

It isn’t our “responsibility “ to make our man feel better. It’s an expression of love. It isn’t our “right” to constantly oppose his ideas for the sake of having our way or making our strong opinions felt. That’s pure ego and negativism. Discuss and make choices together. That’s a relationship. Nobody is there to “win or lose”. You’re together to create solutions together. With love.

Exactly my thoughts as I'm watching this video. There are a few common sense points like thanking and giving praise when someone does something for you. It's mutual respect and appreciation for your partners, children, family, friends and everyone that serves you in some way. Another good point is that everyone should be responsible for their own happiness rather than relying solely on their partners. Agree- it's not the woman's responsibility to mother the man in her life. If he's going from his mom's house to your house and still behaving like a boy- it's way too much work to keep the relationship or marriage going in the long run especially once you have children.

Yeah true boys that I ve met mostly fall in love with me because I'm adulting them. Not that I'm trying hard but its like i dunno how to say like babysit them. Now, I met a young boy and after few days he started to show signs of dominance.

All men are boys

Sounds like your getting with they wrong TYPE

A Virgo no doubt

John Gray is an abuser himself so I doubt he will talk about this.

@@doratiscareno5856 sounds like you are blaming the victim. These men hide who they really are. Besides, how is she supposed to avoid them when guys like John Gray are literally promoting this behavior as normal?

@@blackswan4486 I am Bad Choice

Women universally do majority of grunt work so this really doesn’t track.

Laundry cooking cleaning dishes choir rearing nurturing consoling analyzing organizing - in most cultures men expect women to do virtually everything for them or they aren’t being “cared” for & he will find someone else.

I did everything wrong and deeply regret it!

Wonderful confidence. Bravo.

The proof that this is not true is that you are watching a video about relationships. If you really didn't care, you wouldn't be here. This is not something to be ashamed about, you know. We were made for relationships.

@@hx1487 Sometimes people watch videos out of curiosity and to find out what is being said.

@@judymanuel4314 you sound sad and cold to me. And no, the speaker is not gay. Oh my gosh!

Heather D. Morris, you sound like my sister. Her job and other roles in her life force her to use her masculine side more and as a consequence she has low estrogen in ratio to testosterone. Keep in mind this is very "functional" but it is not the way God designed you to be. Your best performance and Christian service will always be higher when you are operating in sync with your design in the long term.... Maybe you do need a masculine male; a masculine male and all this "difficult work" is the way God designed it to keep the genders distinct and to model Elohim. Marriage is a divine institution. Christian marriage, ideally, is to model the essence of Elohim: genuine love, righteousness, and justice.

I went through my masculine side in my teens amd sabotaged my soul mate /love of my life😂. Demn i know how staying stuck in yohr masculime side feels..

None would make it threw the test lol

Wow. So clear!

It really helps "make the cut." If couples waited at LEAST three months, they'd have closer relationships and VALUE each other more.

Such a Good word,

@@valafisher8971 only weak ones will fail.

Ditto

Amen.

It's all about adaptability towards each other and having to adjust each other's differences. .

Exactly

This isn't about pick me. It's about making a mature relationship work. Both sides have to learn the skills to deal with the opposite sex.

These “differences“ in thinking have nothing to do with male and female. They have to do with entitlement. Please read Don Hennessey, Lundy Bancroft, Shannon Thomas, Barbara Roberts (a cry for justice) if you are Christian, etc.

What scripture is this?? I neeeeddd this scripture

@@MarandaX. 1 Peter 3:7

@@MarandaX. I keep trying to post something here to answer you, but this channel won't let me!😪

@@suetucker9264 thank you dear..

never understood how "women are hard to understand" falls on her. not that difficult to figure gives too much credit.

This is great, your husband doesn't lie to you, this is a good sign!

@@valkyrjadatterafmanen1062 no. This is a bad sign because it means he is emotionally abusive. Please read Lundy Bancroft instead of John Gray

then tell him next time, he can stay home. Cultivate your own interests and passions.

Hey. He's being emotional vulnerable.

@@genericname7020 not really. He’s being controlling and domineering.

Thanks for watching and for your comments to Gigi!

Just sounds like too much work....always have to be alert to detect the nuances. Just tiring!

Good question...

Listening to this is exhausting

Because men are babies

My thought exactly 👍

You are very blessed ❤️🌹

Hi 👋 Sharon, how are you doing?

Well if you are referring to the alternative that sex is for everyone… that’s just called gross. I’d prefer to share the emotions that come with sex with one person vs the community. Seriously… the latter is gross…

I don't think that was the point at all...for me that wouldn't even come to mind...it Is gross!

yes exactly. sex without marriage is saying God is wrong and it is ok to be a loser. some say their truth but if it is against Jesus the truth absolute, it is simply living a lie. the need is forgiveness and His amazing grace.

people pleaser? When pleasing another displeases the lord. when it goes against Him. is the road to disaster.

In some circles we believe it’s best to try before you buy!

Thank you so much for watching and for your kind words too!

I've read that is an opportunity for failure in a man's eyes. They are risking the choice not being great or best and also disappointing you. That's a 2 failures for the price of one.

Yes!! I'm like, "haven't you been attention?! Don't you have the internet?"

As a man i can tell you this: I will do almost anything for the woman i love except for one thing I CANT READ YOUR MIND. So what you think doesn't really mean much unless you actually say it. Preferably in more well mannered way.

@@uegvdczuVF valid. But overtime you could make suggestions. Kind of like "how you feel about...?" "I was thinking"

@@andreabeasley3287 they need to stop being wimpy. Just say it. Spit it out.

For sure.

@@RachelleGrahamwriter If you are into music, Honey, here's my latest single for you: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-76OxSEgWN9c.html. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks! Take care.

Yes but the way they are pushing gender bending theories on masses they're not gonna like it.

I wouldn't trust the system to teach kids these things. We need to find another way.

This guy is both man and woman..... because he understands both. :))))) As the men who go to Asia to Thailand and experience so much happiness of Buddhism and they are at peace with everybody.

Why did those men use and abuse you?

Good for you girl single is good as well ~ Roarr!

I mean this in the kindest way. If all the men you dated were abusive, there is one common factor here. You need to find out why you are (initially) attracted to that type of person, practical ways to screen them out, and how to be able to see good men of quality.

You're missing the entire point. The point is to reach an understanding. Women used to know these things but now women are really toxic toward men. We think they don't feel anything because they feel like they have to hide their feelings. But they have deep feelings! They feel harangued and harassed by us and don't know how to deal with it. We come in pretty strong and they're trying really hard, but they can't read our minds. In his book, he also teaches the men how to not step all over women. But in this video, he's talking to women.

Give him easy chores.appreciate when he does that.increase of testosterone will slowly bring transformation

It’s about control, I’m sure his demands don’t end there....jealousy, insecurity and the need to be in control

I think the fundamental question is not whether he is macho or submissive. It’s whether he is selfish or entitled.

Hi 👋 Leslie, how are you doing?

@@patrickmckinley6679 Hello.. Im good.

@@charlenepym5250 Am fine Leslie, where are you texting from?

Me too.

SC here. Very interesting

That’s not true whatsoever. There are tons of men who are nothing like that, and cultures where men or nothing like that at all

Over an hour and a half discussion and that was your takeaway? ...lol....okay.

Read Don Hennessy instead.

Read Don Hennessy instead.

Well, he actually started the trend of quick dating advice (as opposed to going to counseling).

Indeed

Thank you so much for your kind words and for watching too!

Correct. The less a woman does for a man the better off she is - especially in the beginning. Never do to much for a man - they don’t want it and don’t appreciate it - let him do for you especially in the first few months or year of the relationship. I know of several real life examples of this. Took me awhile to figure it out.

Hi 👋 Helen, how are you doing?

But so many men and women come from broken homes. So they might have to heal themselves.

I could not agree more! I came out of a dysfunctional family, and it is tough to wing it on your own. ct

So true, my car wouldn't start at a gas station. Within 2 minutes, I had four men all over my car trying to get it started, one even using a hammer on something under the hood. And I am in my 70's. It was hilarious.

ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-V0qsQBsdrTE.html

He can feel useful by cleaning the house. Gladly.

Most marriages suffer because we make it a human thing it becomes a big party that has a beginning and an end instead of involving the creator of marriage the reason you have a wife is because you will never be able to give God a hug and a kiss on the cheek the way you do any father that loves you he invented marriage so that you could show that kind of love to her and vice versa and that is what marriage is about teaching each other the kind of love and giving one another the kind of love you wish you could give our heavenly father in Jesus name I say Amen to that

trust is surrender..not respect

And helpful to you Nat.

Lol where? Where are the genuinely nice guys? Where is this mythical population of great men? They are in high demand but apparently they are invisible or in hiding.😆

@@sheddinglightspreadingligh8864 I've met hundreds (literally) through learning how to social/partner dance and attending dances over the last 15 years. I'm 58 now and still meeting some wonderful men.

😅😅😅😅😅😅😅😅

Sheeeish

Love this guy

What a sweet comment! As a guy, I'm also grateful that John's books have opened my eyes a long time ago, and have spawned an entire "gender-difference" book industry, all for the betterment of couples.

All human beings think differently. Not every man thinks the same. But, we all see the same reality. Many people like to claim they “think differently“ as an excuse to ignore facts.

All human beings think differently. Not every man thinks the same. But, we all see the same reality. Many people like to claim they “think differently“ as an excuse to ignore facts.

All human beings think differently. Not every man thinks the same. But, we all see the same reality. Many people like to claim they “think differently“ as an excuse to ignore facts.

Please read Don Hennessey or Lundy Bancroft before you read John Gray.

This isn’t about the first simple matter of knowing if a guy likes us or not. This is about how to keep a very different (male) creature invested in a long successful relationship over many years. Given most relationships fail and devastate legions of adults and children every day it bears a little effort to understand the complexities of male/female dynamics, and no one puts it more simply and comprehensively than this guy. Here he covered a whole lot from several books so I suggest trying the first book which an easy read, and if intrigued go into the more biological stuff. I think u honestly will never understand men unless u do. Plus it’s a great advantage to know their inner workings when don’t know yours ;-)

@@leslie16450 sorry, but you shouldn’t have to keep someone interested. Just don’t hurt or abuse them, and engage with them often. Very simple.

I don’t know if I agree. There are depressed or autistic men who don’t always show how they feel. But generally speaking, I agree, that you shouldn’t have to make someone like you

@@leslie16450 Then they should also learn how women work. 😉 It's not just our responsibility to make relationship work!

@@leslie16450 human nature is too complex and fickle for all these prescriptions. I will always believe that when two people love each other they will make the effort to make it work. And yes, it is really that simple.

It took me 19

Yeah me too I'm 37

Men are fascinating creatures! When they love you it is marvelous! My husband is excellent and remarkable, I give him a lot of space to do his work and hobbies. He’s the head of the house and I’m his helper… like God created us to be one flesh. Blessings to all.

@@carmenkamberos1156 I have one of those. He's my boyfriend.

Fun fact: word "Ezer" in Bible (that was translated as a helper) refers to Eve only two times, then few times it refers to powerful people and in about 16 other cases it refers to God. So it seems that it doesn't suggest that a helper is supposed to be submissive or less powerful.

For me its the same, except I like to learn about women, since I am a man :)

Agreed. Much love 🥺❤️

Apples to window treatments

Mh... Why would I love you have to be a lie😅 I have seen couples which are happily married , the guy said I love you and he meant it for years. I also know couples who didnt have sex till they were married. I dnt know why you assume I love you its a lie its a weird assumption. Woman we have intuition. We know when its just a phrase or when its true.

I'm short and rotund. I still wear horizontal stripes because I am not trying to be something that I'm not.

😂😂😂😂😂😂 same don’t see the comparison at all

I really don’t relate to a lot of this… I feel like I have trained my brain to look for the positive in any situation (tough times bring growth and there is always a positive to every situation even if it is just that it builds resilience). I see the negative in a situation but I don’t inflate it.

Yep! I'm right there with you at 66

Love this!!

This is valuable because most ppl watching this think that females watching this want to settle down. That's just not so. It's more to survive the workplace politics lol.

i think the most important thing is good intentions i feel like there's no problem complementing the man and believing you are two halves that make a whole as long as they have pure intentions and are good people

John Gray is giving women valuable advice that we women need to hear. I think I was doing it wrong in my last relationship. Thank you for giving us invaluable information that will help both sexes win. Good advice!

WTF. No it doesnt. +15 y working in typical male environments. You dont know what I had to listen for example, about girlfriends and wives there, opinions, plans and cheatings. Usually wondered if the gfriends and wives got to know these things and got to know how manipulative many are. You have to sell your humanity to go to work everyday spite of that or start speaking up. And not to speak about the moment of realization that you're earning less than your male coworkers, they patronize you, your work is signed by male peers, you leave a job and they hire 2 males to cover your position, you hear about the woman from x department who has been sexually harassed. Good luck when you change jobs... I havent been in one where men treated women as equals.

Wow you couldn't be more right! Totally agree. Its my experience too.

Pressing someone to meet their responsibilities isn’t nagging. He started it. Please read Lundy Bancroft instead of John Gray.

Women who have had bad experiences often spend their lives on guard always expecting the worst. That may then become a self fulfilling prophecy.I have been a clinical psychologist since 1979 with many many women as clients. I also was a founding board president of two womens abuse shelters. I know the research I tsught psychology to undr and grad students and was a researcher and I know women via my clinical practice. I am going to keep the technical jargon out of my comment. It takes alot of work to recover from abuse. But here I am talking about the more usual circumstances when a woman may have just come out of relationhip without overt abuse. She may feel she put more into the relationship than the man did and feel taken advantage of.She may feel she must guard against giving too much again....she may adopt that as a strategy with men. That may serve her but more usually it doesnt in the longterm. It is a matter of balance. You do have to be your real self but if you come off cold and aloof obviously most men are going to look elsewhere...just as most women would with a man who was cold and aloof. If you are too busy protecting yourself you will not be open to a loving relationship. Lots of people, male and female think of relationships as a zero sum game..if I give too much I will be taken for granted and get the short end of the deal..they think of it as a negotiation...ie I want more and I want to give less to feel I come out on top, they think in terms of power. There are of course some men like that...doesnt bode well for a deeply satisfying life long relationship if either person is power driven...this includes same sex relationships. Sybil Francis PhD clincal psychologist

@@latinaalma1947 I think it’s more likely that abusers target already-abused people. And your viewpoints and explanations only give them the green light to do so, because they’ll know that the victim’s current complaints about their behavior will be chalked up to “she’s just aloof/hypervigilant because it happened to her before”.

The cross cultural rearch on relationships DOES show the more similar people are on values, goals, personailty characteristics, the more likely a relationship.is to last. Regarding personality, the most validated theory of personality is the Five Factor Model: 1. Openness to ideas and experiences vs Traditional/Rules oriented...where you fall on that continuum. 2. Conscientiousness - how long you can stick to a goal, how motivated you stay to get things done that you want to do AND how much can you make yourself do things you know need to be done that dont appeal to you. 3.Extroversion vs Introversion where on that scale do you fall. 4. Agreeablness vs Disagreeableness. 5. Neuroticism Openness: Men tend to be slightly more open to new experience than women. Men are more exploratory because they evolved to hunt game further from their encampment. Women often had small children with them thus they were gatherers of berries, fruits, and plant based foods closer by so they could take their smallchildren with them foraging. Today many women ARE exploratory in their needs and their behavior , but not as many as men. Conscientiousness: the genders are more equal on this dimension. Extroversion/Introversion: similar levels Agreeableness: Women are usually more agreeable than men...men evolved to compete for status and for food etc to attract women and procreate. Men did learn to form alliances hunting big game etc but women were dependent on the male for food while heavily pregnant and nursing so they evolved to be somewhst more agreeable than men did. Sometimes TOO agreeable in modern times.But the disagreeable end of the spectrum people have difficulty in all their relationships. Neuroticism- the research on personality shows that women are more neurotic than men. Dont worry I will get to men who are the bulk of violent and/or mentally ill prisoners , schizophrenic homeless, alcohol.and drug addicted, etc. Some common markers of neuroticism in women are obsession with appearance tending towards narcissism and eating disorders, stress related high anxiety in adolescent girls exhibited in catasphrophizing, self harm like cutting, higher rates of suicide attempts in teen girls etc....adolescence is the most neurotic and the most dangerous period when girls/women are at risk. Some of this resolves over time by the 30s, but higher overall rates of women suffer from anxiety and depression than men..thats remains true throughout life. Dont think men escape unscathed clinically. The following psychological problems are more prevalent in men than women these are not part of the Five Factor The ory of Personality. They are mental disorders as classified in the DSM IV our clinical diagnostic manual for psychiatrists and CLINICAL psychologists (only psychiatrist MDs and licensed PhD trained clinical psychologists can legally diagnose in the USA)... Men have higher rates of Schizophrenia, Sociopathy, Psychopathy for example. Women have higher incidents of Borderline Personality Disorder, Anxiety Disorder, Depression.... These maladies do.not affect most men or women. Most of us have the propensity to develop strong and happy bonds and relationships with people...with those we chose to spend our lives with or just some time with, whether these relationships include sexual activity or don't...deep abiding love is possible in many ways as expressed in poetry, literature, drama, and history all are replete with love stories for country, for family, for religious figures, for ones social group however we care to define that, for friends, for lovers, for children, fleetingly for strangers, or a lifetime .... Sybil Francis PhD, clincal psychologist

Mom always made her needs known to him and I saw that he was the best husband ever and thought my mom was lucky to have him. When in fact he felt he was the one blessed to her her. I knew he was because she was kind and loving and gentle and patient and had a temper. I believed that his loving patience when she got mad which wasn’t often made him the the most patient after she died we talked a lot about her and her temper he told me that he encouraged her to not hold back How she felt so he would understand why she was angry. I didn’t want her to internalize or resent me so I could understand at the time and not keep not knowing I was pissing her off We laughed. There wasn’t a time that I couldn’t see the logic and what I needed to do to help both of us. He had an incredible ability not to personalize the things she said. He shared that all I could see is even how beautiful she was when she was angry and had to stop grinning at her. Lol

Hi 👋 Marcela, how are the doing ?

Hi 👋 Louisa, how are you doing?

You're very welcome! Thank you so much for watching and for your kind comments too!

It also help a woman to be born with a Fire sign in astrology,and find the best match possible ;)

Most ppl are in the middle. Like what you are speaking of.. These extremes are uncommon. I think it is more performance than natural. Life is hard we wouldn’t get far if women were crushed by every little thing and men were constantly running away. These examples in the interview are about ppl with mental illness or adults who are still childlike- not healthy well adjusted adults.