Whenever I asked my ex husband to do anything he said to stop nagging him, even though I would only ask once I haven’t dated for a while , working multiple jobs, I have become very independent out of necessity but also because I hate to feel needy I wish men could see how much it means to us when they support bus emotionally ,that’s really what I need from a man
@@EZDatingCoach Women don't need to try too hard to ask the right way, just because a woman asked, it's already brave enough, most women are afraid to even ask anything because they know a man will discourage them. I wish women were welcomed to just ask then trying to guess how and in what way and walking on eggshells around men...
I do everything for my husband. I only ever ask my husband to help me with things that I can’t do by myself I don’t do it in a nagging way but he makes me feel like I am. It’s not to do with how I ask but that he can’t be bothered says he will do it when he feels like it. What can I do? 🤷♀️
@@carol6544 Oh carol I’m really sorry about that okay. Please do everything you can to make sure your relationship works fine if you really feel something special for him and if he’s feeling the same way.
Judy I’m so sorry about that okay. You know women like you are rare to find in this world but men at times don’t really appreciate what they’re blessed with till they lose it.
I've always been independent and hard working and have had all any woman could ever want but the older I've become I realize how much I need a man for many reasons. I realize I'm not as independent as I once thought. I realize I get lonely too. I realize I need help with things and to share the chores. I realize I need a man's opinions and ideas that will lead me on a straight path. There's so much a man has that can be a blessing. We do need men if we are honest. ❤
Here's my criteria... 1) Intelligence ...2) Sense of humor... 3) Emotional stability... 4) then comes LOOKS. The stronger the first 3 are, the more #4 can slide.
I'm kinda laughing out loud at making a man feel needed by asking him to put my coat on.... what kind of simpleton do you think us women are? What about making someone feel needed by sharing deep conversation and friendship, or long bouts of laughter? Surely that's the golden nugget? Relax and be yourself, and if in the small chance that she can't put her own jacket on, help out, but don't think that will be the action that melted her heart...
Lol, one time I was dating this guy. We had went to a party. It was pretty cold out and so I asked him could he get my jacket from the car? In my entire LIFE, I cannot remember making a request like that. Well, to my utter shock, he kind of gave me a GLARE before doing so. It was the only time I EVER had asked him to do something personal like that!!!! And he had claimed to be in love with me. Really disappointing that he supposedly loved me, yet obviously felt very offended by my simple request.
That statement "women don't need men anymore" is SOOO untrue. Men are wonderful and we women need them for lots of things. PLEASE STOP PERPETUATING THIS MYTH!!!
I dunno...I need a man for kisses, cuddles, sex, some company and a male perspective sometimes. Things you can't buy. And if he'll deal with arachnids for me, he's my hero. 🙂 In my experience, men aged 45+ tend to be...Unattractive in the way they view women. Not all of them, of course. I also find them lacking in mental energy. And many don't look after their bodies. They look pregnant and say they want a slim woman who looks after herself. It makes no sense. Feels like it's some sort of entitlement. They let go of themselves, make no real effort, yet feel they should have a beauty queen. 🤷♀️ Just saying.
What you said about these older men is spot on. Most of them look like pigs. And Yes, they all seem to want a drop dead gorgeous virgin. They can't face reality
Reading through these responses makes we want to start a relationship clinic. It’s so obvious why they’re single!! Take a deep breath single people, take the labels off along with expectations and just relax. Open your eyes to who you’re dating. And if you want them to do something, ask them, sweetly. Just as in Any training, positive encouragement works best!
I couldn't get passed no. 1. I'm self sufficient and reliant. This generation of men made me that way. Most men I know and have dated since 2002 (including my children's father) we're not / are not emotionally equipped to handle being an adult, let alone someone who could lead in a relationship. THAT is not my fault. I made more money, worked more hours, and when I had the kids he was happy to let me handle all the responsibilities of that as well. I could go on and on about the emotional state of men in my generation, but every generation has its trials. I'm not even sure I want to date. I was thinking of doing my journey by documenting it on RU-vid and came across your video doing some research. But, this is a subject my friends and I have discussed at great lengths. Our generation of men seemed filled with narcissist, mama's boys, or some form of fear of "commitment" bla bla bla ... anyway I blame it on Hollywood. So it's hard to make a guy feel needed. Most of them don't even know how to show up to warrant that. But anyway ... I'll probably watch you later out of curiosity, but .... I don't date Because I have a lot to offer and for once I'd like to be matched at my energy level. Paying for people's dreams when they don't actually want to put the work in is old. What I need is someone who still loves life and wants to keep experiencing all it has to offer. .... just saying Ok I'll shut up.now.
@theprairielight But we do need them. We can’t do it all. Our community needs them to lead so we can then focus more on our children; ourselves. We are so stressed we are killing ourselves overeating and not eating properly. Our mental health needs them. We need each other. We need them to heal and become our leaders. We are both dealing with the remnants of slavery, Jim Crow and the continue daily micro aggression. We need a spiritual awakening so we can learn to love ourselves because religion can’t do it for us. Practicing Universal Laws have helped me tremendously. I left religion behind. My thought process is so different. I feel empowered. I am empowered. God is looking for true believers. Much love!❤️
@theprairielight lol. I hear you. It may take 1-3 years, and and lifetime of steady growth. It isn’t easy but what is the alternative? Very few couples (5-10 percent) will have harmonious relations because the vast majority of people have not done and will not do the work. What I’m saying is directly related to the Bible verse about many being called, but few are chosen. Few will choose to do the work. That is reality. The fee that do will attract others that do. The 90 plus percent who don’t want to do better will just switch partners hoping they are getting something better, but they will not. They are getting someone who is on the same vibration as them just in another outer disguise.
Oh. He can be the bread winner. I have no problem with that at this stage of my life. I've been working hard since I was 13 years old... time for someone to help me .or share the load
THANK YOU! Help with my coat? And the door? And THAT'S IT? Lame! I'll be polite and say thank you to those gestures- but if you're trying to BE with me, then you better not stop at just gestures. I provide substantial services in a relationship and I expect substantial services in return. Just bc I'm 50+ doesn't mean I should consider myself lucky to accept any old scrub into my life. I'm not patting anyone on the back for doing nothing and pretending it's something. Help me with something I actually NEED (or even WANT) help with! If you can't help with expenses or at least pay for dates and vacations at the big age of 50+, then at least be able to fix & build things... or give really good massages. Provide SOMETHING substantial!
@@LilyBecca my father did for my mom and raised 8 kids and didn't ask my mom for anything because she cooked and cleaned .. she worked hard as a housewife...his meal was always on the table when he got home from work..and house cleaned
@@themaggattack what the heck are you talking about .. your imagination has left the building. Seems you've been through a bad relationship. Men are to respect their spouse and visa versa. Men take care of their family .. the wife takes care of the home and is able to make a bit of cash once the children are grown up. Or even when the children are in school full time ...but she takes care of the home Wouldn't you like to come home to a nice greeting and clean home everyday so that your home is a haven?
I have experienced resentment from men for not making enough money! One even saying I want someone rich! I think I picked some that are not right for me?
Nice guys are EVERYWHERE, and women cant stand them. We are boring, dull, and dont make you tingle.. But you complain that bad boys dont treat you nice. If women could figure yourselves out, maybe men MIGHT be able to, too.
@@samkline7705 you can be nice and not be boring and dull. Yeah nice guys are everywhere? Yeah always nice at first and when they have you they turn into monsters.
@@soniaboussalem7451 I know life might have thrown so much at you from some men that hasn’t made up their mind on what they wants before getting involve with any woman. But that doesn’t mean you won’t find that special one meant for you when the time comes okay.
yessss the guy ive been seeing loves when I need something from him. I'm pretty independent as a person so it was hard asking him to help with random things but it did improve our relationship!
Gabriel, sorry you think that way..a woman ..can be..old fashion in her beliefs, a.and still be independent, ..both, together, are make for a well rounded woman, which in fact..makes for a much better human being..and that's a very good thing in it self..however we all are free to believe as we wish..and please I hope you have not taken my reply to yours as criticism,it was never my intent to do so...but just what I believe..regarding this matter.thank for allowing me this opportunity, to have shared it with you and any who as read it as well ..thank you..
I never ask for anything like the sugar example, because I'd feel he'd be pissed off with me treating him like my lackey. So I do things myself, unless someone does something without me asking. And then, yes, I'd appreciative because he :1. knew me well enough to see that something was wrong #2. Did the thing without me having to ask/do it myself. #3. Even if I didn't want it, he still made the effort. So I'd probably accept it because of that. It's something I do for others (friends or boyfriends), and those small gestures are HUGE. It's about noticing and awareness, which means the person is in the moment. I've also been with guys who walk 5 steps ahead, not noticing they're walking too fast/taking giant strides, and I'm not at his side. When I was younger, I'd run to catch up. Then I'd ask them to slow down. Now I just keep my pace, and see if they even notice, because they are obviously oblivious to my presence, and the salad days of running after someone are over.
You need to add. Not nagging (which you mention), not being argumentative over meaningless things. Ultimately, women at 50 need to enhance the happiness he has created for himself. bring peace and a lot of women can’t bring peace to themselves. Address baggage. Mindfulness, gratitude journal,… Don’t mess with men that are not happy themselves. As horrible as This sounds get evaluated for borderline personality disorder, and narcissist, personality disorder. Whether you are a man or a woman. You’ve got to address issues. A number of my friends now can identify certain traits, particularly those that are being untreated. (Any woman that can never say “sorry” or says her last X partners were narcissistic, and it was never her fault (no accountability) are HUGE red flags…like fireworks of red flags raining down, like it’s China.
We need men. But finding a good looking sparkling passioned well developed man who doesnt drink, cheats or doesnt see your feelings and wellbeing as a priority is very hard to find. Besides the divorce trauma's and stress from work.
@@lisaariottiart Hello beautiful lady, how’re you doing today? Don’t make that land a wasteland if it’s what I’m thinking okay. Cos no matter how long the right one will surely come to make you smile a whole lot no matter what life might have thrown at you.
But don’t write someone off either. You don’t need a guy and that’s a great way to be but someone will come along one day and you will WANT them and that’s the difference. He may also love that you are very independent. But don’t write anyone off.
You might not need a man now due to some things life might have thrown at you to make such decisions but there’re times everyone needs to be loved by that special one no matter how independent we can be. Especially when we getting old to be resting and enjoying life with our family.
@@susaneisel230 Everyone is fully entitled to their decisions in life! What really matters is our happiness to live no matter what we’re going through at any point in time.
Stay Away from dating apps if you are over 50!! You will thank me later. :) Develop yourself including fitness and dress and hobbies. Learn and never stop learning- find humor in everything and hsve a grateful heart. Be content with your own company. Make friends with gals or guys. Make people feel safe to speak up.
Or a cat - but that would make you a 'cat lady' - why are single women with dogs not 'dog lady'? Why are single men with cat(s) not 'cat man'? BTW- men who have cat(s) are great. I have 🐈 🐈. BTW- I love dog🐕 too. Men who have cat 🐈 & 🐕 are great. Hope to have 🐕 too someday.
My son nailed it. He said men want to be needed but not obligated. My partner wants me to have NO needs. I ask for very little even though I do have needs. He is very dismissive. This probably won't last long. I always express my appreciation too so I don't know, I give up.
No , not all women feel that way. I still need a man and would welcome the right one. I would love a kindred spirit , some to love and someone to love me. A companion, a lover, a friend , someone to share adventures with, teach me things, lead, someone to do the manly things that men do and someone to help bring home the bacon. I want a king and to be someone’s queen.
This whole reward for just cleaning up after yourself... I really can't wrap my mind around it. Why would I praise a man for effectively being grown up enough to wipe his own behind after a bm.
Good day to you Janet. How’re you doing today? I hope you’re feeling much better today! And be rest assured the right man meant for you will surely show up without any stress when the time comes.
This may give you a better result from the Universe. "The right man is out there. I know he is my destiny and is also seeking me. It is bound to happen in the near future".
married 30 years and now going through divorce sadly. You say he wants me happy (happy wife, happy life)? what a joke - I've communicated my needs, etc and he just couldn't. For example, I leave for work at 7:00 a.m. and in the winter I asked if he could clear space in the garage so I don't have to scrape ice/snow off my car - you know what he did, he cleared the garage and parked HIS car in the garage - so yeah, Im outside at 7:00am scraping snow and Ice in business work clothes as he is inside the house petting the cat drinking coffee.
This is really a great video. Four simple things but they resonated so much as I am a guy and that made so much sense to me. Now I have to find a woman like that. Thank you for posting!
Miguel if this comment was meant for me . Your wrong I am not married..I am a 75yr young woman minister of the word of God..if a woman or man do not give one another a chance ...time....to see,or,hear..what and who the person they are dating are real or not as to the character and integrity they have..weather they are wearing what I refer to as a mask, or masks,. That mask or masks,....will start following away real fast, one by one, after they marry...to late, can't erase the spots off of a leopard... that's what my Dad said once to me..and have lived long enough to know that's very true...either or will never be happy...who u are, is who you choose to be way before you even thought of dating or marriage...think about that...hope u have or had already either way...
Judy, thank God more woman are becoming aware of who they are, and standing their ground,,as to what they expect from a man as being considered as a friend, boyfriend and or potential husband..we have eyes to see,ears to hear, and ...brains, and feelings...as well. however, how one was brought up in their younger yrs as to the way their mother, or any woman that raised them , how they were treated, physically and or abusively, in actions and speech,. Will most likely become just like the man who treated that woman ..kind consideration, compassionate, responsible man or just the opposite, each fits into the equiation.but, in having said that..thank God some having had to experience that..have had to bear it while living in that environment, untill they moved out ,and do very well in their relationships.they are those who detested have to see and hear and live it first hand..and refused to follow suit..they are more compassionate,caring, understanding human beings, in spite of all they had endured..and blessed.to have gotten out sane and whole..so women have step up to the plate,. And work on themselves, first and foremost, by learning to better .. themselves, financially, and emotionally..before ever considering, marriage or living together with a man..a woman should know who she is, what she wants,and expects not only from a man but from all human beings...if she dosent, then she is doing a disservice, to herself and society in general..thanks for letting me share..hope it has helped someone..
If he is a real man, woman will automatically and naturally feel she needs hem in her life. He will be really and from heart appreciated and respected. Also a real gentleman senses and knows these boundaries without us having to explain. In case of my ex, i communicated my positive boundaries, but i got the complete opposite. Sometimes, a woman practices all these tips but they are just not ment to be together,
Thank you! I’ve been working on the Needing part. Due to my parents, I wanted to make sure I was able to take care of myself if my husband ever left. And I also had to take care of everything when I was young, so I have tools I have ambition, not afraid to take risks, have my own business… But I do need a man to be in my life so I wish I would’ve learned this in my 20s instead of my 50s. Lol!
Men are SO simple, and women cant seem to figure us out respect me as a man feed me never stop being a girlfriend, even as a wife f me, not as a reward, and don't withhold sex as a weapon any man will be yours forever
Ladies, please know the man’s temperament before taking 100% of this coaches advice. There are plenty of other ways to make a man feel needed then giving him chores. Many men will not feel “needed” if you say something like the coach suggests “you’d look so sexy if you vacuumed the house”. They will feel manipulated, and feminized. I suggest to find a coach who is the type of man you want to be with, and take his advice. If this coach is that, than so be it
The fallacy in this talk is that you say men are interested in relationships. They are not. They do not truly want to be in them. So women who show this slavish admiration will only end up with huge regrets.
Effection means more than anything and all you mention sadly the ones that go with looks but im a firm believer its what inside that matters not the outside
I was nicely surprised with your advice. I'm gearing up to maybe date again in my 60's. My litmus test will be raking leaves either at my place or his. If he sees it as a pain or a degrading fall chore to whine through, I'll move on. If he's up for beer, wine, hot chocolate, munchies, music, and happy exhaustion as we lay in a pile of autumn colors then this is my kind of guy.
You made them too needed...as if you were needy & using them like an errand boy. I see alot of women do that, men also like a woman who is competent without him. Men need space just like women!
They usually don't come out and say it I've had to figure it out by the words they've said and when they find another young girl with a job, that's why they chose that. Thank you you're right thanks for helping people.
So I stopped listening to the vid about halfway in because I started feeling bad. My ex never did any of those things. I'm not sure that a woman today even wants to do those things.
So women raise their children because their children NEED them now there's an empty nested home and they have to raise another child that NEEDS them? Men truly do not understand that women felt relieved of when the needy children leave the home to have their own families. This burden took a toll of nonworking and working women with overwhelming physical, mental, and emotional and sexual burdens. Once children leave, the woman feels overwhelmingly relieved and free of providing all the needs then she focuses on the relationship and being free of providing herself to the entire family..... Now we have to raise another needy child? We look to men as providing for us in all ways to make up for all the years of women giving everything they had during child rearing years. Ugh! Women NEED these 4 things also. Too many snowflake mommy raised men nowadays.
Thank you for the video. Actually, guys don't give me a chance to do those things. They're only wanting hook ups and nothing more. When I say no on the first meeting, they get mad. How do we get to the stage you're talking about?
Majority of Women in civilized society like America, Europe don’t NEED men, a wide majority are independent.....but the reverse is the case for the vast majority of women in Africa.. In Africa as a whole, majority of the women still depend on the man to provide everything for them. Majority of the Men are still the sole breadwinner in Africa...!!! Africa has a long way to go. Women are still treated as second class citizens. Much love everyone ❤️❤️❤️❤️
First of all the west is not civilized. Also, western women are also being treated as second class citizens too. It is a global problem! Don't let some white supremacist tell you that life in the west is all nice and dandy. That's a bullshit, racist myth.
That's not civilization, men have to play as the provider for the family and protector, women on the other hand nurture, raise and maintain the family. When men lose this they won't commit to a relationship, and when girl feel dependent they less and less cling to family values. The final result is women craving men and men losing their energy on prostitution and less committed relationships
I am so sorry for my feedback, but You do concentrate on the little unimportant things. What we need is, simple. A man takes a leed and is the boss in mind and body (action) during the relationship. Cleaning house, opening doors, etc. - why are we even talking about it? Everybody needs some support in life,, mental, physical, financial... Just do what You are meant to do, thanks!
Yep, step up to the plate..in all ways,we as women, want to be needed as well as appreciated, we are not there to be their younger mother, with benefits..
I dont need a guy to put a coat on me because I live in Florida and its hot! Maybe a man who could fan me and feed me grapes while I lounge beside the pool 😃
Hi Gemma, if u are referring u,and other women need a man regarding sexually, that is a horse of a different color. No woman or man,who have found they are satisfied without looking here there and every where for that prince,or princess, are priceless...they know who they are,what they are about, and happy content with the lives they have made for themselves..however,having said that , it is always nice to have at least one true friend of the same sex, with basically the same interests..and intelligence..to occasionally do things with...as u put it..you need man... sounds as if your insecure, first find out why,then work on all the positives...you...have..bet you have many...we all do...bet u are awesome, give yourself credit...never depend on anyone.. Life changes,we change..be .. All..u...can..be..for...yourself..man looks at the outer person...but God..looks at a persons heart...thank you for letting me share my thoughts with u...happiness comes from within..when u have peace of heart and mind..you have everything...life is a good teacher,but God is a better one...be safe..
Oh Cindy I’m so sorry about that okay. And you still have all the time to make a turn around and fix everything so you both can live happily together if he’s still very much interested in you.
Dude…… Men have been looked down upon far too long to accept that we are puppies just OBEYING for a treat. Sounds wrong Is wrong. So once again WE Submit, not have a woman 👩 to submit. Thats whats wrong with things now. Moving on….
Been married twice and @ 63 I am very happy living alone without the drama of a woman, but I do like sex & continue to date several women aka: spinning plates. My motto is: Hang out, have fun, hook up. Amazing: To my amazement younger pre-menopausal women are attracted to older guys like me. I am physically fit with masculine features.
I think in the early stages of dating folks are only willing to provide stability if the compatibility and chemistry are high which can be difficult to find. 🙂
You're saying women don't need us anymore yet the majority of them still have steady boyfriends or husbands anyway and later on separate and divorce over and over again and again!! That is just so crazy!! So women pretty much have it made it sounds like!! Well congrats to them!! Talk about having their cake and eating it too, this one really takes it!!
I think the popularity of Agatha Christie and 'Jeeves and Wooster' is because men are men and women are women and everyone knows where they stand, and it's very comforting. Where these men are is another thing entirely.
Heather well stated..you got that Right.. don't make them like my dad and brother were..for.. sure...now it's all about them..what they want and expect the woman They are looking for to marry .have no brains..no good character, or integreaty, nor abe confident and have any indepent thoughts oractions aside from theirs...so sad we woman now live in world we live in..now...,75 yrs young, in 10 day this my March 2022.. but hey...I'm not looking ,why would I...I have God Almighty, in my life and have for a very long time..found he is all I I need to man in this world could ever..compete,nor come near to him..in any way,shape,or form..for me anyway..hope all u woman who are waiting for ,"your prince charming" to come along,. I truly hope you find him.. whether, you be old fashioned,/ indedependent,or one or both..I sincerely hope, if God perfect Will for you..that you will meet him..thank you for allowing to share not only how I feel but also .how blessed I am to have God ..in my life...he has never,asked me to cook,wash his dirty clothes, or jump like a frog when he expects me to..yep you all can have your man, if you ever find him .. I'll keep my God...for he knows better then anyone here on Earth..and never disappoints me... just keeps loving,caring,& compassionate,for & toward for me..hope when you find the man you are hoping for to come into your life..you will able to feel, and say what I feel and have said..truly I do hope so.. God bless you all and keep you safe and give great decernment regards to this matter and in all things in your life..be safe..be on your game..stand your ground and keep always alert..their are many..deceivers out their..both men and women..I have lived long enough to attest to that..God bless you all...thank you again .. minister and teacherand preacher of the word of God,,ministry named..rain drop ministries.if you have a Bible read Isaiah 55 verses 10 &11.. and then you will understand why God himself gave impressed me it's the name he wanted my ministry to be named... it's mind boggling..the way and reasons of God Almighty..for Sure.. I'm never ceased to be amazed...to his awesome ways & that is the truth ..