Mom Stole my Wedding Dress... so I got Revenge - r/AITA 

Story 1: OP's mother's concerns are entirely irrelevant to the fact that she stole from the OP. OP is an adult, and should be free to make whatever 'mistakes' the mother fears. Instead of a forever ban, I would ban her for as long as it takes for OP's mother to demonstrate an acknowledgement that she was wrong, and to respect for OP's boundaries and property, or something similar is bound to happen again. Story 2: OP is completely in the right. Blatantly ignoring OP's stated wishes, even after OP was willing to pay for them, is a serious red flag. If he is comletely comfortable dictating OP's diet from day 1, there is a decent chance this will escalate to dictating OP's clothing and appearance, mobility, access to friends, etc. It is infantilizing, disrespectful, and a possible precursor to something far more abusive.

On the second story. It is not wrong in the least for a woman to want to sneak away from a date. Plenty of women have been made to feel unsafe on their date just because the guy doesn’t know boundaries or how to respect women. Sneaking away by a back exit is fine, especially if she doesn’t want the guy following her home, which may be a danger. I have seen some things posted online where restaurants offer secret escape options triggered by ordering specific drinks. The drink names are probably fictional, but a woman can let staff know she’s on a bad date by ordering one. Depending on the order, the staff will either call her a cab or call the police.

In Story #3:I fully understand OP's reaction to the joke as I've been in a similar situation with my dad. He had no right to make that joke especially after hearing from the OP himself that they do not fully forgive him for his actions. He was extremely inconsiderate given that he led on the mom later in their marriage and was fooling around at his workplace, as the OP said he was always expecting the time to leave home everyday. So my question is, did he really actually care about the OP and his siblings?

Story 4- WHAT??! HELL NAW! Forget the other guy's kids! He did damage to this OP. Why should HIS children now benefit from his bad actions?! Nope! HE'D better take care of Them! He's still around to do it.🤨

Story 2: She made the right choice. The dude acting like he gets a say in what he eats, then calling her a floozy and then calling her out in the group when he had no place and I'm sure he didn't mention he did which led to her response in the call out. Dude clearly has a power trip mentality that definitely doesn't sound safe

Story 2: if we only look at the surface of the situation, then yes op was a jerk for ditching without communicating this wasnt working. HOWEVER as a woman on a date with a man that has already been extremely controlling over something as simple as a meal choice, did not listen to her no, and made her uncomfortable in other ways i 1000% agree with what she did. Those are some srs red flags. What could have happened if she told him she was leaving, would he create a scene? Get violent? Follow her to her car???? Those are the kind of "what if" scenarios women cant afford to take. If a man is making her feel unsafe 10 mins into the date its time to leave in a way that prioritizes her safety over his feelings

Story 1 seems like OP has a history of folding to mom's demands and that OP has finally just had enough.

in 2, she didnt feel safe. he was controlling from the get go and continues to show this by bringing it to the group. the waitress was a saint

Second story: As asked: I would probably do either the same or make a big show out of me leaving this because he is being controlling so I got eyewitnesses that I wanted to leave and end the date there and calling a friend or familymember to pick me up, waiting in the restaurant with the staff till they arrive. Because someone this controlling on a first date is NOT someone safe. Either you get out sneaky or you make sure you got as many witnesses as possible. I am a rather strong woman, I don't take shit. But there are fights that you shouldn't even risk to fight because if the other is just selfcentered enough or crazy enough, they will harm you with no regards for anything and that is way to dangerous to play 50/50 chances with.

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I don't see how his mom could think that his younger siblings should receive any of that inheritance, it all came from his biological dad who they have absolutely zero connection with

For the last story the OP should definitely keep the money and stuff from their siblings because they weren't the children of the OP's father, so why should they get his money?

Story 2 who orders for thier date on the first date then tries to basically forcefeed them something they don't want? I would have run too

Story #3- Uhn-uhn, Abby shouldn't be contacting the OP at all! Nobody wants to talk to the Homewrecker! Especially not the Ex or the children. The joke was inappropriate &I understand OP's anger. Thinking about the Mom... Op is RIGHT, dad is very immature (like a teen)!😬

Law student (saying that to say not a lawyer, not to brag). The trust stuff is a good idea. The only problem is whether or not there are revocable or irrevocable terms, where it goes where OP dies, and is he comfortable having to ask someone else for access to his money just for the benefit of asset protection and avoiding a conversation with his family.

Story 4 is easy! It's Tom's legacy and only his. He will not get anything when the stepfather dies, and clearly the half-siblings are too young yet, the third is not born yet (when this story was written)

Her mom called her spoiled the materialistic because she accepted a hand-me-down dress? Wow

It’s not just that the mother stole the dress it’s all of the hurtful things that she said and that she was so willing to break boundaries and trust in order to just get her way

Story 2: Trust your gut. You made the right move. People suck.

Story 1: It's a temporary ban. Might last a year tops. The mom has nothing to worry about. Actions have consequences and a temporary ban is a fair consequence for the mom's action.

My sister has a different dad than me who's loaded. Like, LOADED. I can't even begin to imagine expecting or asking her for money if he left her something. Only if I had some major medical emergency or something, WITH the promise I would pay her back however long it took. That would be her money and hers alone.

If you rent a wedding dress, which is pretty common since most people didn't buy their wedding dress, they're all also secondhand (or third, or fourth, or fifth, or... well, you get the idea) with various history.

I’m a child of divorce and I was forced to get alone with my biological fathers girlfriends kids and one was 14 15 and the girl was 12 at the time my dad was super abusive and I would cling onto my mom and begged to go home one time I had a ear infection and my dad took the kids to a skating rink and he punched my ear when we left and it forced my ear to hurt even more from the pressure

The restaurant date story:dont let anyone tell you what to eat! But OP should say that straight in his face. The fathers wedding story:dont go. I wouldn't. If he wished the best for his family he wouldn't cheat. There is no excuse for cheating. Get divorced first then do what ever you want.

Story 4: There is no correct option in this scenario. Lesser of two evils is stand firm OP. He was your dad, not theirs.

Story 3: hearing this, I wonder if my parents even love each other or if they just stay together because they tolerate each other and are religious so divorce isnt on the table for them. They have gone on date and are pleasant. But my dad was away from work, a lot, traveling. Leaving my mom home alone with the kids for months at a time. Whenever he came home, he was either playing video games or sleeping. He did occasionally do chores or go out to special events with my mom but it just didnt seem as close as they wanted to look. Now that I am in a relationship of my own, I see how distance my mom and dad are compared to my boyfriend and I. It's like they are on 2 different planets. She's very artistic while he is very intellectual. Sometimes, he wont even respond or talk to her. Often losing himself in his video watching. I see it all the time, even now, years after I moved out. I wonder what will happen to their relationship once my siblings move out. I'm pretty sure they have very little in common and that will come to light when the last remaining child leaves.

"Don't shit where you eat." Is what i think the saying is.

I think that the forever ban is a bit harsh, though I do see where the OP is coming from. I think that the ban should be until the wedding is over or until the op has kids.

Remember guys to go to the Spotify. Am i the jerk.

Second story: Discovered date was toxic and so was most of the group. Killed two birds with one stone. Plenty of other fan groups out there for OP to join that aren't kinda bags of manure!

Story #2- 😂 Ha! No, you are NOT the Jerk! How is ANY1 on HIS side, when he basically tells her "no you can't have want you want til Next time"?! Then orders FOR you, not even knowing anything about you or what you like yet?! This is CRAZY!!🥴😳😲

Story 2:; You should have greeted your date with, "Hello, there!"

I have been watching videos on your channel for 3 days.

I know I’m probably going to have a similar situation in the future as the op from the last story. I have a lot of half siblings from both my mom and dad from prior relationships. My mom passed away a few years ago and my dad has told me he’s leaving me every thing when he dies. God the shit storm that’s going to come out of that😵

Story #1- Jeez, talk about a Karen-Mom! Some mom's really think they should be able to hold that Power. We GROWN now! Let it GO! Maybe don't ban her forever, since she DID return it &apologize. Plus, you MAY just want your future kids to get to know their maternal Grandma.🤷🏾‍♀️

The stores are great but the only thing I really care about are the cats that are shown did you show cute and adorable😩

For the last story, do not share the money. He was his father's only child. End

1st story: OP is not wrong. 2nd story: OP is absolutely justified in her actions. She couldn't know if someone this controlling would become violent. 3rd story: the father is the jerk, and if the problem was incompatibility he should have divorced first, instead of having an affair. 4th story: Not a jerk, he can be charitable if he wants, but he's not talking from them anything that they had rights to.

Story 1: Mixed. It's completely justified that OP is angry, but banning your mother from your house forever seems a bit extreme. Story 2: Not a jerk. That guy was a massive red flag, although it indeed would have been wiser to be honest about the situation instead of sneaking out, which he will now use against OP. Story 3: Not a jerk. The reasoning may seem a little petty, but ultimately, OP has every right to choose not to go to the wedding. Story 4: Not a jerk. The father wasn't even related to the siblings, OP shouldn't give them a penny!

1.I think the mothers problem is that she have a unhappy marriage and dont want OP to suffer the same, since she is supperticious she truly believes that that Dress is going to give OP the same thing it give to her. She shouldnt ban her, she should take to therapy because she obviously need it. Also tell her to stop believing that bullcrap of "bad energy". Use the dress and show her that the dress didnt have anything to do with her life. 2.I would have walked away from him too leaving the final comment: Oh no little jimmy, this is not how you treat your date. *He wants to tell you what to eat* what the actual F? Such entittlement. 4.Hahahaha, no. OP dosent have any legal neither moral responsability to give them the money. Step Father was a jerk and this is the consecuence of that. Younger siblins are not his full brothers, they dont have the right to have anything from the inheritence. I guess Grandmother and Mother knew they were having finantial problems or just wanted expensive stuffs.

I love the kitty background

story 4 hell no should he split it its his dads inheritance money the half siblings have no relations to the OPs Dad. Why would they get any of the money

inheritance story, Why is it the parent who has children with someone else thinks the half siblings should get the inheritance from the person who isn't related to them at all?

Story 1: We have a similar thing in African cultures. We also can't name a child after someone that died young

Story #2: Dude... no... come on, don't say she did something bad by sneaking away from a date with a guy she doesn't know very well. Talking online is a very different situation that actually meeting someone on a date. Even if they had phisically met before as friends, is really not the same thing. She had no idea how he would reacted if she had confronted him or tell him to his face "she wasn't feeling it". He had already set a bad precedent trying to impose himself to her. This was not a "burguer vs salmon" situation... this was a "I don't know this guy and I don't want to set him off" situation. She had every right to put her safety above the rules of date etiquette and his feelings. She made the right call. Also... don't blame the girl for dating within a group where she shares interests dear to her... this is exactly how people bond and form relationships... Where are you going to find your friends or partners if is not on a group you're bonding over work, classes, shared interests, etc?

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its dont shit where you eat but close enough

For the last story When adding to a trust fund they’ll still need to pay taxes since she’s already received it.

Yeah, no, OP in story 1 has every right to ban her mother from her home indefinitely after she committed grand larceny by stealing the dress.

Story 2: Nope, nope, nope. I'd make it really clear that the behavior is creepy and controlling and anyone who doesn't get it in the Star Wars group is a neckbeard not worth associating with. Spill the (lentils), all of them, mention that you'd felt uncomfortable and if people really are on his side then find another group and leave those assholes in the dust. Story 3: The dad was trying to absolve himself of responsibility. Clearly, for him, this wasn't that big of a deal, but for the family he left behind to go chase tail, it's only been a couple years. By trying to justify his cheating and then making an extremely off color joke, he was pretty clearly trying to 'bring in' the son on the way HE feels about it- that is, like he was justified because he "didn't think about compatibility back then" and sorta implied that cheating is company culture in medicine???? No way. He knows damn well that it was inappropriate, he just wanted to try and get the son not to hold him responsible anymore with ill placed humor. Story 4: Sorry, but no. He wasn't their father, and if he wanted them to have the money he would have set it up in a will. Not doing so makes it very clear that the son was meant to have the estate and pressuring ANYONE what to do with their inheritance is never okay, period. The very request demonstrates that the mother isn't putting all her child on equal footing- she let her new husband belittle and torment her son, and now wants him to give up what he is entitled to in the name of misguided 'fairness'. Absolutely not, and shame on the mother and grandmother for even suggesting it.

Nice vid man, how are you?

where is the background from

Cat cat=cute (in my opinion)

Hi

Timestamps...

4:57

Storyv2: typical incel behavior.

TBH I am kinda with the mother in the first one Like the dress has a bad history why would you wear it?

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For the 1st story, I kinda agree with her mother. The whole "Negative Energy" was not proven by science and they seem to think it's nonsense. I however encounter the aspect of "Negative Energy" myself. I at the time was kind of a manager at a small 'restaurant' (or shop that sell rice with grilled pork, that's all). The business was going fine. One day, my brother had a big argument with a staff and she was angry that she went home. "Negative Energy" was not considered as the ability to do work but a kinda spiritual feeling that affect the ones around them. Right after that fight, the customers didn't go into my shop for at least an hour, which never happened before. Well, the fight started because of a joke made by me earlier, and neither of them wanted that joke, so I was the guilty one at that, but the customers from outside didn't know a thing about this but they somehow stopped coming into my shop for at least an hour. Back in the syory, her mother did what she did in concern for her marriage might gone wrong in the future and the OP would be the one to suffer the damage. In this case, the OP should take note with her mother. Even thought Spiritual things are not approved by scientists, people should not be careless with it.

story 1.. yeah while the OP's mom is kind of a Karen, forbidding your own mom in your house forever is an overreaction. She is your mom. When all fails you, your mom will be by your side. The fact that she even went as far as stealing the dress to make a point (albeit wrong lol)shows she cares of your well being. Story 2 .. Yeah OP is a jerk for not facing the rejection. She could have handle it better. Op's date probably is trying to assert dominance and authority by doing that. The proper course of action should have been the OP asking the server to prepare salmon and not the burger the jerk date ordered and they be done with it. Or just tell him you're leaving . Story 3 .. OP's dad probably deserved.