That totally makes sense. It is basically a societal expectation to eventually find that someone you want to marry and spend your life with. Thinking that marriage itself can fix the problems is normal and many people believe it. Unfortunately marrying doesn't "fix" anyone, nor having children.
I have to say one more thing: I admire you for what you are doing. I admire that you took it upon yourself to make changes in your life. Outstanding! Thank you for the help you give us all.
This was so 🔥🔥🔥🔥and the explanations make so much sense now that I am 4 months No Contact and can’t wait until the divorce is final after 8 years of emotional and verbal abuse.💯💯💯💯💯
@@RawMotivations Thank you so much! I know you hear this from folks everyday on your platforms, but you are saving damn lives🙏🏽We are blessed to have you, Lee, Synful and others. I am free now, but watching you not only helps me understand what I was dealing with, but how to continue healing myself. May God continue to bless you and your family and future generations. YOU are breaking that stronghold for generations to come brother.🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
My ex romanced me like crazy for OVER a YEAR. No abuse at all! Best experiences EVER! Hiking, biking, kayaking, laughing, loving, serving the community, praying together, playing with kids, helping each other, cooking together, doing business together etc. Then... BOOM! The devaluing, silent treatment, and verbal abuse began. I made excuses he was having a bad day or bad week at first...offers to him of rehab/classes etc...then realizing he was enjoying hurting me. Icky! Divorced and doinv much better. It was the best and worst experience of my life.
There were times when my Ex would declare "Let's get married". It felt like a joke the way he said it and I would rather have wanted it to be more sincere. I'd say "Ok, sort it then", but nothing ever happened. No rings were bought, and if deposits were ever put on one, something would happen like him guading me for an argument to get me to leave or him threaten me with the Police if I didn't go, all just so he'd not have to go through with it. This was 'future faking' at its most deceitful. 🍒
Just recently I finally had to ask my husband who was a narcissist If he loved me; if I meant anything to him he flat out said no to both. Then he screamed at me get out of my life. I just don't know when it is the right time to leave I'm so broken. I took this marriage very seriously and I put so much effort into it and I'm just so emotionally drained and so tired. I appreciate you sharing this it's very insightful and I really need to hear it. He has gaslighted me manipulated me many times not realizing what he was doing. And I didn't realize it was a narcissism until it was far too late. There's a many times when hes locked me out of the bedroom and silent treated me and punishing me. for things...
Thank you for these videos that you put up, they have helped me a lot in my personal life and they are helping me how to be able to advise my daughter too, thank you.
That’s so interesting! I’ve never been in love and was going along with the future faking despite being warned to stay away from him and half heartedly I acquiesced. I thought it was something that was wrong with me and that I’d never hear those words from another man.
It's better to go an entire lifetime without hearing the words "I love you will you marry me" from a man than hear it from a predatory con artist who ruins the meaning of those precious words forever. I would rather die single and alone than get tricked into legal slavery with a practiced love scammer.
But Lulu I hope you do find real love with a genuine non-narcissistic man who truly thinks the world of you. And I'm very sorry you got future faked. I also ignored warnings previously from well meaning people when I was future faked and it hurts that much more when you or they break it off because there's no sympathy from your inner circle because they just say they tried to warn you and you didn't listen, not realizing how vulnerable we all potentially are to these charmers. There's nothing wrong with you for wanting to be loved and in love with a man. What could be more normal than that?! You'll hear those words authentically coming out of a good man's mouth someday. And in that moment you'll be so relieved you walked away or got rejected by all the lowlifes prior!
In my experience they believe the next person is "the one". The one who will change them. Their soul mate. The one they've been searching for their entire life. You know, the same way they felt about you in the beginning.
because it's never fun for a narcissist to have no one to cheat on and see if they can get away with it and then hint about it until they finally let the affair be found out in some way because they enjoy hurting someone they were able to con and get them to do all kinds of things to please them. Narcissists usually choose to marry someone they can easily hate, like a truth teller or someone who is a true self and doesn't gossip, tell lies or betray others.
