Never Run Out Of Things To Say... (CONFIDENCE HACKS) 

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"You're not meant to act your way through life, your meant to live your way through life". This one hit me hard Julian.

"If youre not embarrassing yourself your not taking high enough risks" Dang.

Allowing yourself to get embarrassed also shows you when you are triggered, giving you some good data that you can work off of.

Who or what has taught us to be so self-conscious, to hide our true selves under a socially acceptable fascade, that we need to re-learn how to be genuine in a conversation?

I never feel weird or awkward being silent around close family members like my mom. I think its good to have silence aswell, not necessarily always blabbing on about stuff XD

I can’t get over those shoes 😂

There’s this one older guy that works with me. His main language is Spanish, but he understands English enough and is able to speak English as well, but not as clear or fluent. He’s always in good spirit as he’ll always ask me and everyone else if we need help, or he’ll bring waters and other stuff we may need on his own. I always appreciate his kind gestures and his positive attitude rubs off all of us coworkers to the pint where even though we don’t always understand everything that he says, it’s the way he says things and his intentions behind them.

The problem with the approach of lowering your barrier for me is, I have a tendency to overshare with people when I run out of things to talk about with people I don't know very well, for example details about myself that might lower my value in people's eyes (eg. sharing my insecurities) or sometimes details or stories about others that, if I had more of a filter, I would think twice about sharing as I would be causing harm to the reputation of myself or others.

Why does it matter if u run out of things to say it is an awful amount of pressure to put on one’s self to have to talk non stop. Been quiet is a blessing and been able to be quiet around people it takes confidence to be quiet people who have to fill silence are usually insecure

The concept of attracting people to the authentic you rather than your public persona is extremely interesting and insightful. I've never thought about it that way before, but it really would be a surefire way to find people you can connect with

Honestly Julien your content is always super practical and easy to approach!!❤

Everytime i watch your videos I can always relate, you're such a great communicator and you have a great ability to change people's perceptions. You're rockin' those shoes btw 🔥😎

I just want to say thank you for putting up some real advice for confidence and being yourself and not alpha BS. This video really resonated with me.

Love this so much! You are such a light to many, thank you!

Great stuff. Being authentic is the way to live, even if it means being vulnerable and not hiding behind masks and acting. But, after it's all said and done, it's a lot more refreshing being genuine, and when life truly begins.

Julien you're a legend! You help me and others around the world. I appreciate you so much!

Hi Julien, I'm from Brazil, and if wasnt your sharing this content on youtube I would probably never heard about you, but you are helping me a lot, thanks for the advices and videos

Thank you Julien, this makes so much sense and i appreciate how you put your words together❤️

Thank you, this is very uplifting! I needed to hear this today. Perfect timing for me to recieve this.

For the past years i have denied myself a lot of emotions. Didnt have any boundaries anymore. Didnt even cry when i got diagnosed with chronic disease. And have been struggling with anxiety and panic. I have started with letting go in the past year. Im feeling a LOT of emotions again. I have made some desicions for myself and now i find myself sitting alone in bali. Other side of the world from my home country. Never thought in 1000 years i would ever do this.

Thank you Julien for all those helpful insights. I really appreciate you.

Julien every single video of you is pure gold

One thing I can remember is being in a foreign country with less local language skills will cut off the first layer immediately. The lack of words and the willingness to connect with people drag you automatically in. So funny when I drop myself into risky circumstances. Haha Btw.: Nice outfit for a speaker 😂

Awesome content Julien! And by the way dude, I really think you're in for a ride! There's more to come. Much love!❤

that was the learning i needed thanks man you're the best

Awesome video and so many examples you talk about that has helped me become a much better speaker and genuine person

SOOOOOO MUCH TRUTH HERE CANT WRAP MY MIND AROUND IT (plus your outfit is dope)

Hey Julien Thank you for helping me in healing Journey 🙏

This is so powerful. Thank you very much!

lol his appearance paired with that title I was convinced this must be satire. but no, really good stuff to take to heart! thanks for the reminders

THE SHOES!!!! 🤣😍

"Embarrass yourself more". Easier said done done. BUT CAN BE DONE!

Julien, this is so much for me, my heart started beating fast. I gotta let it out, see, I'm a 6ft3, 26years old man, coming from rich family. I feel like I have no excuse to not be a much better developed person, but I am just not. Such a people pleaser and at the same time I get tired from that and then I am in a rage mode for a few weeks. While at it, people treat me better, but then it all goes back. I have a strong habit to act accordingly to the situation, to always say the right things. Very far from happy. I soaked up everything you said in this video. I feel like if I just stop acting hard and wise, I will act like an idiot. And I will lose all respect at all from my family and friends. And I can not stand people disrespecting me, I argue and fight, I cut out connections. Same when people laught at me. I feel it like a threat to my life - now they are laughing, tomorrow they will start kicking me, and after that they might as well get rid of me, set me up or something. Is it even normal? I can deal with losing a few people for the sake of my mental health, but how should you deal with people straight up disrespecting you? Again, I am a big guy, so I feel like if people sense no threat from me at all, I think they immediately want to try me.

This guy has some really great insights to say! Thank you Julien

I dont mind the pauses. The silence is super valuable to me because conversations could keep going and going and taking a second to take a break helps us all breathe and live life normally

Thank you!

You always will play a role in society. Just choose the more appropriate for you.

I did not expect this video to be this good

The shirt. The slippers. The kimono. I’m here for it 💯 this man is so genuine.

Love to see you grow Julien. Been following for the past couple of years ! Certainly that ginger bearded guy had an effect lmao

I just found you its great that and its true we worry too much about being confident too much thinking and confident people dont even think about it

God Bless Julien...

Great teaching 👏❤️

You're absolutely right that it's how you say it but when you are dealing with unhealthy hyper Vigilant people, who haven't done their inner healing LOL they're not interpreting your tone accurately at all. No matter what you do LOL I learned throughout 20 years of working in healthcare to just continue being me, and not altering for another, speaking consistently and confidently, while I watched so many people have various reactions over the years depending on what was going on within them, which is the only way they can interpret the world around them.

This guy is outa this world! What planet did he come from? He certainly practices what he preaches. Subscribed immediately.

Man, u are a superhero❤

This video is pure gold😮

Good content again!

This whole thing is a game. Not a trivial game, but one played none the less. -Alan Watts paraphrased

Thank you

Love your videos! I NEED to know how you choose your outfits though 😂 I can't stop looking at those giant feet shoes with those pajama pants

the topics you talked about are great

“Hi I’m Julien, I like salad.” That’s where I want to be

Damn youre strong knowladge guy. Thats cool. Thanks a lot, it halps maldy

Charisma on command who? Haha! This is so good!

🎯 Key Takeaways for quick navigation: 00:30 📚 Communication is not just about content but also the vibe; introduces the concept of "four layers of communication." 00:59 🗣 The surface layer, "what you say," is often overemphasized, but it's the least important compared to "how you say it." 02:41 🎭 Avoid fake, people-pleasing intonations; speak naturally as you would with close friends and family. 03:16 💡 Intention behind words is crucial; distinction between "offering value" and "taking value" is more about the underlying frame or intention. 06:04 🌱 The deepest layer, your level of self-esteem, is the hardest to fake and the most powerful; it's more significant than the surface layers. 08:48 🎭 Focusing too much on the superficial layer of conversation leads to overthinking and stifling your natural flow of speech. 09:17 🎯 Lower the bar for what you say; trying to be perfect comes across as "try-hard" and inauthentic. 10:53 🗨️ Being open and lowering the barrier to speak increases connection and decreases the chance of running out of things to say. 12:30 🎢 Taking risks and embarrassing yourself leads to growth and more interesting life stories. 14:00 🎭🚫 Being authentic may initially push people away but ultimately attracts those who resonate with your true self. Made with HARPA AI

Do your best and ignore the outcome! We don’t control outcomes! Especially the “what do they think of me” outcome.

how to comment that. you had the flow to tell the truth.

🎯 Key Takeaways for quick navigation: 00:00 🗣️ Introduction to the challenge of running out of things to say in conversations - Discusses the common problem of finding the right thing to say in social situations, - Highlights that while content is important, it isn't everything, and the "vibe" of communication also matters. 00:59 📚 The four layers of communication explained - Explains the concept of the four layers of communication, - Stresses that "what you say" is the least important compared to "how you say it" and the intention behind it, - Emphasizes the significance of pitch and tone in speech. 03:16 💡 Delving into intentions and value in communication - Introduction of the third layer of communication: the intention behind what's said, - Discussion about offeringvalue versus taking value in interactions, - Illustrates how the same question can differ based on the intent behind it. 05:31 🌟 The power of deeper communication layers over surface layers - Outlines how deeper levels of communication, like intention and self-esteem, are more powerful, - Explains that people often focus too much on the surface layer, which leads to running out of things to say, - Emphasizes the importance of being genuine, as deeper layers are harder to fake. 07:44 🐾 Human pre-verbal communication and emotional intelligence - Points out that humans are pre-verbal beings, learning through feeling and emotional intelligence, - Mentions that even in serious matters, people rely on more than just verbal content when trusting others, - Highlights that genuine communication is rooted in non-verbal, honest signals difficult to fake. 09:17 🗣️ Embracing imperfections enhances confidence - Lowering the expectations for what you say paradoxically boosts confidence. - Trying to always say the "right" thing comes off as inauthentic. - Confidence is being comfortable, even with saying unconventional things. 10:53 💡 Lowering your conversational barriers fosters connection - Over-filtering thoughts creates a barrier in interactions. - Being honest when you're out of words can be unexpectedly refreshing. - Lowering conversational expectations creates a more relaxed communication atmosphere. 12:00 😂 Embracing embarrassment leads to authentic experiences - Not fearing embarrassment encourages risk-taking and authentic living. -Embarrassing moments often make for valuable, relatable stories. - Seeking perfection in social interactions is less appealing than genuine experiences. 13:31 🧭 Authenticity attracts your true 'tribe' - Being real may distance some people but attracts the right ones. - Authenticity can lead to a challenging transformation phase, affecting existing relationships. - True self-expression aligns you with individuals who appreciate your authenticity. 15:01 🎭 Dropping societal roles unleashes your true self - Society often forces roles (good parent, dutiful child) that suppress individuality. - Living these imposed roles prevents you from expressing your genuine passions and aspirations. - Life is about living authentically, not acting through predetermined roles. Made with HARPA AI

This dude is dressed like a custom character in a videogame, but good advice otherwise lol

I know so much of this myself, came to these conclusions myself but it’s so hard to actually execute it’s insane.

Hey Julien. First of all your content is great. Especially the last part was interesting: drop "the roles" made me think a lot. I have been dealing with this for a while now, because throughout all my life I happen to always play different roles: with my family (also I play different roles with different members of the family if that makes sense) with friends, at work, I even feel like I change in different situations during my day..... At one hand I feel like I HAVE TO in order to maintain a certain relationship with a person and also to fit into society in a way, to stick to the group...But on the other hand I find myself a bit fake (even if I am always my true authentic self with each person I am with) and then there is also a big part of it which makes me proud that I am so versatile, that I have so many different types of friends, who stimulate me in so many different ways, good relationships with family, etc. The thing I worked on is: to always keep my core beliefs...they never change, even in different roles and that took a long process and hard work... I feel extremely happy about this, but still sometimes I have the feeling of not have found myself yet and act fake. I am extremely curious of how you feel about this and would love to know if you know an example of how to deal with this? X

I feel bad for anyone who’s taking the guy wearing a red robe, pajama pants and sunglasses, seriously

Its all about how you say it. Thats what ive been thinking about since i discovered julians videos, since he dressee like whatever yet his words are so impactful. It goes against everything we have been taught and that messee us up.

i find i funny i lern so much from a guy with feet shoes and doom t-shirt and sunglasses. thanks alot :D

Love it

Sometimes the best thing to say is nothing at all.

I'm a pro actor by now 😂. But im dropping the mask already, and some people specially parents have been very triggered. And will continue to get triggered the more I let my true self come out. I'm ready to live, not act. That phrase really reminded me of that.

I can't believe this information and wisdom is free it's changing my life as we speak and entertaining

I loved the shoes lol

Notification Squad!🔥🔥🔥

Those shoes are fkn hilarious bro😂🔥 love it

It really triggers me, when people fake intention. I feel that they want to trick me and kind of exploit me. Holding flowers in front hand and knife behind back

I feel like I’ve always told stories and acted as someone who has a lot of embarrassing stories or stuff happening which makes me look a little ditsy or dumb but laughing about it. Though I sometimes think maybe I do it so much I’ve made being a fool as somewhat of an identity , and I’m not comfortable with being any other way .

love that❤

Acute deciphering of social / people's behaviours . Fans from Pakistan

I feel like I would repeat myself a lot if I said that I ran out of things to say, every time I run out of things to say. Then again you could ask, what's so bad about repeating yourself?

Man got the foot shoes, super cool

I was there in Amsterdam, the vibe was awesome! I do wonder though, where does one get the shoes? They are awesome

I think it's hard cuz my mom used to use humiliation to punish me as a child, and it made me want to never want to be embarassed.

i have to get one of those shirts

I told someone I like banana milk. And they told me they don’t give a fuck. 😂😂

Julien, you’re a fuckin awesome dude

I want those shoes for Christmas lol

10:05 They break the rules of cool which makes them cool. This reminds me of the Hullabalooza episode of the Simpsons when Homer and Marge are trying to figure out how to be cool and can’t quite get it 😂 “it’s hip to be square!”

Shoes are insane

Bro chose to wear the “I don’t care about your opinion” outfit when he woke up this morning.

This is literally me 😔

Where did you purchase those flippers?

Ok...ok..but whyyy are you dressed like that??😂😂 I always had this one question in mind!!

Julian I find myself constantly having existential thoughts, It’s like I’m constantly looking at my life from a 4d perspective, how do I make it stop

Simply if I feel like they don’t want to continue talking and are dry in the conversations then I stop talking

Man dressed like a 6th grader up late at a sleepover lmao

This man's teaching makes Varsity look like kindergarten

Just bee urself 🐝🐝🐝

Silk robes and kimonos. This is the guy. 🤣

Que tênis de Hobit is this ? 😂 where can i find um desses para mim usar? 😂

Where can I watch the entire speech?

Julien sunglasses main ruin you vision if u rock them all the time