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This feels like a direct-to-DVD movie that would come out in 2006 when everyone was trying to be the next Toy Story, but for some reason came out in 2022, and we should all be ashamed because of it.
They left out an amazing part near the beginning, where since Pinocchio left Geppedophile to join the circus, he asks the horse to be his new dad. My friend and I thought he was joking, but then Pinocchio refers to the horse as father or daddy for a good portion of the movie
@@draum8103 or the part when the long last policeman dad is looking for his handkerchief and Pinocchio says 'Here, you left it in my mouth' with the inflection of a gimp who just had a great time
@@Dragoniron97 Gepetto and the horse scowling disapprovingly: 'Um...why were you putting things in our son's mouth last night officer? We are his daddies, only we are allowed to put things in his mouth.'
that's 'cause everyone already knows about that. it's a classic, definitely legit plotpoint that makes perfect sense in the original Pinocchio (1883) so no need, really
There is a single frame at 13:37 where the character models for Pinocchio and the horse are just …. missing…. Before popping into the rendered background. Absolute masterclass filmmaking
This is a true story. The events depicted in this film took place in San Miniato Basso in 2022. At the request of the survivors the names have been changed. Out of respect for the dead the rest has been told exactly as it occurred.
HELLO!!! I want to spend time with celebrities. Just kidding. GAGAGAGAGA! I only want to spend time with my two girlfriends and record videos for RU-vid with the 3 of us. OH YEAH. Don't hate me for living the best life, dear rick
“The film you are about to see is an account of the tragedy that befell a group of five youths, in particular Sally Hardesty and her invalid brother, Franklin.”
without even thinking I went: “and hides behind the sheet” like this movie is already a dumpster fire, no one’s gonna ask what sheet or what that means 😭
the thing is, pauly shore can be properly directed but he can't rlly...act. He basically just plays himself every time. So if u cast him, it better be for a character who's just like him, comic relief and/or doesn't have much screentime. For this movie, he was not only badly directed (like everyone else) but badly cast as a main character ur supposed to take srsly and connect with
I'm an interpreter and it really does look like they were trying to translate the movie from russian word by word which you do not do ever! You hear a sentence, you understand the essence of what's being said and you translate it in a way that would make sense in the other language. I speak russian a little and I've seen a clip of the original and it sounded fine and Pinocchio had a voice of a teenage boy, not a voice of a 50 year old gay man who's trying to feminize his voice.
It is localization versus translation. Most of the time, translating something word for word isn't going to properly convey meaning in another language (unless the sentences are very simplistic). Localization does precisely what you've described (and what this movie should have done) where the proper essence of a message is translated instead of just word by word. Clearly they weren't going for any kind of clarity in this film, which makes it all the better for us.
The story I've heard behind Pauly Shore being Pinocchio is apparently the people who made the movie insisted that he play the part. Apparently Pauly actually refused a few times and made sure they confirmed that they knew who he was and that they were certain they wanted him for the role. Even he knew he was the wrong choice, but here we are
@@andrewblack2596 yeah, and I'm pretty sure it's legit. I know that Pauly shores reaction to being requested for the role was something like "are you serious? Do they know who I am? Are they sure they have the right person?"
I tried to figure out which parts of this movie specifically were a true story and I decided that the cat with a gun wearing knickerbockers is the most likely candidate for being real.
Pinocchio was acting like he was on cocaine/speed the entire movie leaping around 100 feet in the air and doing backflips all over the place like that lol
is also stupid, this movie is not gonna get any other kind of exposure, either they are embarassed of what they made, or they have no idea how the world works... which would make sense if they thought that pauly shore is a name that would sell in 2022
@@justsomeguywholovesberserk6375 Lionsgate, because fuck you that's why. The fact that multiple people made this, agreed to this and famous actors agreed to be in this is deeply depressing
fun fact: I used to work for one of the producers of this. I’ve even written some notes on Pinocchio (press release and stuff) but haven’t seen the movie tho. also I subscribed to this channel like two weeks ago and now I’m seeing this (but the producer is really great btw, his name is Roman Borisevich, you should check his other feature films, like How I Ended This Summer, or Tale in the Darkness. he’s also working on a sci-fi film with Alexander Kuznetsov who is now starring in new Fantastic Beasts, another Marcus’s favourite movie)
woah I've been a fan of Aleksandr kuznetzov since seeing him in a russian film, summer, ages ago and it's so weird to see his name more and more! Just said to someone earlier how weird it is that he's suddenly in a massive film and here he is mentioned here too. Looking forward to seeing him do sci fi
To explain why the lying=nose grows thing doesn't happen, that's because this is based on the soviet version of Pinocchio called Burotino where the evil guy is basically a greedy human trafficker and he has a cat and fox as henchmen. There was actually a really good soviet movie based on it lol but yeah no nose growing happens there. He just gets enslaved in a circus instead
*casually yet aggressively swings the door open* "It's just me" I don't think I've ever died laughing at something simple like this in my life, but goddamn did I need it LOL. Gonna quote this and say it exactly like this everytime I visit someone now
Back in the 90's I had a VHS tape called "The REAL Story of Humpty Dumpty" which was just some cheap straight to video 20 minute American cartoon, but I actually thought it was THE real story that no one knew. I was so excited to tell other people that he got knocked off by a witch on a broom. Unfortunately, Humpty Dumpty didn't come up much in conversation to allow me to share that knowledge, so I just had to force it a few times. I don't think anyone cared.
"We're adding fairies now?" Wait... was there NOT a fairy in the beginning? So how the hell did Pinocchio come to life then? It just... sorta happened, randomly? Because in the original story he was brought to life by a blue fairy. I'll never forget this fact, because the movie A.I. wouldn't shut the hell up about it.
honestly I thought the blue hair girl was gonna bring him to humanity, since its the BLUE fairy (i think shes just a blue witch in the earlier versions? same diff), but then it was just the weird accent red dress lady and ahe sounds like she faked it lmaoo also i too have the "blue fairy" from ai burned into my mind. they really super focused on her in that film lol
Tybalt is my favorite character in this. He just seems so done with everything. Fruity P: Tybalt those people are about to go off that cliff😱 Tybalt: What’s that got to do with me?🤨
Tybalt: 'So...one clown said something and another clown said something...but the real clown here is *YOU* Pinocchio, because you believed them.' BURN.
cosmanaut picture shows are the best thing on this channel ive watched almost all of these like 3-4 times each, the tall girl, twilight hocus pocus. i must have watched like 10 times each you guys are so fucking funny
the fact that the sorceress kept saying “my/our good friend” implies that the writers didn’t think they could make clear they were friends that was one of the first signs they didn’t know how to write
The horse is voiced by Jon Heder, so if you just imagine Pauly Shores character from Encino Man going on an adventure with Napoleon Dynamite it makes the movie slightly better.
Yeah, then Gepetto is like 'NO pinnocchio, you can't leave'. 'But I want to DADDY?' 'Oh ok then, goodbye' then he runs off on the horse despite having zero knowledge and being alive for like 2 days. wtf.
5:44 Two sausages laying in a frying pan. one rolls over and says, man its hot in here. the other jumps up and yells, OMG A TALKING SAUSAGE!!! Marcus' squealing laugh is pretty hilarious as well
The voice acting in this very consistently reminds me of the English voice acting in Stalker: Call of Pripyat, it's uncannily similar in, uh... "quality," it's fucking amazing
This is some 90s video game quality voice acting. If I didn't know the cast list, I'd think this movie had three voice actors and no voice director. That last one is probably true.