Hey, good to see you back in your usual surroundings! This happened to me in a family therapy session with my narc mom and adult daughter a while back. I had promised myself that this time I was not going to take the bait, and I actually held my ground for the first half hour of the session. My mom had opened the session by reading a parable from a book that she chose to use as a vehicle to get a point across about ME. Everybody understood the analogy, and that she was correlating it to my “delusional” thinking on some issues we had previously disagreed about. I managed to abstract and not go into personal details. But, then when my mom started becoming fidgety and agitated over the fact that I managed to remain calm and neutral by commenting only on the merits of the book and greatness of the author, the therapist aggressively jumped in to back her up, saying: “You know that by sharing this story, your mom was really telling a story about YOU. What are your thoughts on that?” Because I felt put on the spot, I fell right into the trap of getting into the weeds with them, and defending myself against their specious sophistry!! You are so right, the “subject is inconsequential.” They just want the “fight” and the “feeling of victory,” which I handed to them on a silver platter (I could kick myself for that). I just wonder how I could have better answered the question without getting into the fray? These sessions were originally intended to be more for my daughter, anyway, but always wound up with ME being the focus. Typical narc move, make it all about YOU to divert the attention away from themselves.
With this one.. It's like she PREFERS you not to say anything. She legit wants yiu to act like a stuffed animal, and stay quiet, don't question anything, don't point out where she's wrong, stay quiet and accept this verbal abuse. Do NOT challenge anything they're saying. Sit there and look like a battered, weak shell of a pathetic "man". Trying to deal with THAT $ht is just... Yea man. 😂
I had a fight with my girlfriend. She had male besties. She asked if I was comfortable with her male besties with whom she flirted with, and i said i was not comfortable. She said we are done its over, i choose my friends over you. Weeks after our break up, she said i was unreasonable and refused to give me reasons why she said i was unreasonable. Man i feel bad.
Dont feel bad - look, you have the right to have feelings, end of story. Men are conditioned to never express their feelings to women, and that’s a problem. If you’re not comfortable, you’re not comfortable. It just means you two are ultimately not meant for each other, and it is nobody’s fault.
@@manganato..9455 Remember She broke up with you. Not the other way around. That says a lot. You said how you felt and she broke up with you. You didn’t brake up with her because of what she did. She broke up with you because of you expressed your opinion and just happened to disagree. I hope you didn’t go back. Although i wouldn’t but surprised if you did. I did. It took me several times to get it. She wasn’t in it to relate to each other. It wasn’t about the Relationship. It was about control. Making you feel bad is part of the control tactic. Then you feel good then bad. It’s a cycle. Hope you’re well in case you read this.
