@God's CHOSEN 1 I’m talking about in the beginning stages. No one can learn you via text in the beginning😒. Text is like reading a book. You don’t know how the characters look so you imagine it, you don’t know what they sound like or what their mannerisms are so you imagine it. How many times have you read a book then went to watch the movie based on the book and thought to yourself that the book was better or the characters were different. The point is somebody can be anybody behind spelling Bc words are just that, spells. Don’t confuse people smh
Attentiveness is a big one. No matter how busy someone is, they will make time for whats important to them. Emotional intelligence is a big one for me too. I can't stand someone who flies off the handle. 💯
Watch his energy. If he not calling you everyday in the dating process. He isn't really into you. Red Flag I think he is either in a relationship or just not that into you.
Big flirt is a red flag. Checking people out and cat calling is a red flag. A person lives with a woman they are not married to. Have children out of wedlock with different partners.
@@VirtuousWoman1143when he’s yelling “ yo “ or saying anything as a woman walks by instead of properly walking up to them and greeting them respectfully
So true. I was dating a man 2 years ago who would gaze at other women. Me, him and my 2 nephews were out for drinks one night. He was starring at another woman and whispered to my nephew "Ooo her waist is so small, she fine." He knew I was actively working on losing my belly fat/body fat. Two weeks later i ghosted his ass with no explanation and he tried to come back but I moved tf on. ✌🏽
For the ladies if a Guy expresses that he doesn't see the worth of a woman in his life relationally beyond sex and being his personal house maid, go on bout yo business.
yes of beyond making babies..some men would be fine with your legs closed because they want to marry a woman who never opened them and simply want to use her body for children..he d steal the children too..
So sad to hear some of you have given up… hearing women say “ I’ve come to realize I’m going to be single”😢 Don’t let the devil still your desires for a husband…”Ye of little faith” God did not design for us to be alone… if we want husbands we have to act like wives… Legs closed, hands up, and feet in the ground… keep your legs closed, continue to pray and seek God, and keep doing God’s work which is your purpose…I’m single and I know as horrible as this dating pool looks, God is preparing my husband for me…we have to remember “When a man finds a wife he finds a good thing”! Instead of preparing for him, some of y’all counting yourselves out or settling for less…stop and wait… remember who and whose you are!!!👑💛🥰
Never will I stay with a grown boy who hangs up on me when the conversation doesn’t go the direction he wants. It’s happened to me twice. Once was a guy who would brag about how he “ used to” sleep with married women, the other was a bipolar flaming hot mess.
Always trying to break your boundaries. Keep asking to come to your house and addressing you by names that you ask him not to because your relationship is not on that term. Not doing what they said they would do. Getting angry because they can't have their way with you; so childish. Giving me a headache. I hear you Tony! Got to go!
Having a person that encourages YOU! Speak on it Tony! I remember being with someone who didn’t like to laugh or smile. This made me feel like I had to dim my light and not be my authentic self. Ladies be with someone who wants to see you smile and enjoy life. ☺️
Me as well…my current relationship my husband wants me to be dimmed and I don’t like that at all… he’s always unhappy and thinks materials will help his unhappiness. Also he wants all the attention and that’s so unhealthy to me
Gosh, this makes lots of sense. No wonder I'm fed up with my ex. Inconsistent, managing money poorly, poor communication, marijuana addiction, too attached to their mother and aunt, gambling, emotional intelligence was terrible too. 🚩🚩🚩
Lord have mercy. Girl at least my former husband was a non-smoker but he had very low integrity and turned to abusing me when he didn't get what he wanted in life.
I don't know how do you happen to end up with people like that. I heard my aunt say that the way a man gets a woman interested is through her ears. Maybe women are subceptible to flattering.
Observe their phone habits. Everything you need to know about a guy is how they handle their phone. Is it silent, do they answer calls around you, his social media? Just from cheating experience :(
Feels like I'm going to be single forever. Its too difficult. Too many people got to go. I think in this day and age we all need to get used to being single and find joy and other things
I agree because the truth is all of us aren't going to get married although it sounds good. There's so much going on and there's more good women than there are men unfortunately.
@@anissa2361, you are absolutely right when I think of all the red flags most of the guys have dated in the past had these red flags and I just tolerated it. I feel like the only way I'm going to get married is if I put up with some bad behaviour from men and just stay with them. Which I don't want to do because getting in a bad relationship can actually kill you. and yes there's more women and more competition now, is definitely not the 90s anymore I just don't feel like it's going to happen for me. I'm definitely not going to get plastic surgery to become the world's ideal woman. I believe I'm attractive but I do not have the hourglass figure that everybody desires.
I have already came to grips with this.. I'm quick to cut them off.. God has to develop this man before he get to me and since God doesn't need my assistance I'm just relaxing and learning all I can to know my next move. I'm the prize. The Queen in my femininity.
It seems like almost everyone that I know or know of are in horrible relationships. I use to think that being single was "a curse", but actually from the things I see others going through that are in a relationship well I think I'll stick to being single a little while longer 😅
PRay and ask the lord to send you a Christian man that love Jesus Christ first of all because they will treat you like the way the lord wants him to treat you don’t get in a hurry and settle take your time let God lead you in that wayy
Of course they are 5/6 men tried to approach me recently and the conversation was all about them .. they show no real interest but they approach you !!!
Another thing I always wonder why the older women mostly widows would tell you to take your time or don't rush marriage because it's more to it than what others are telling you. Or I just had a women tell me baby you doing fine, leave that alone, live your life.
My jaw dropped when he said the statement about not saving. My ex literally said the exact sentence that he doesn’t save and blows his money and “he’ll just go make more”. He would borrow from me and his mom and brother. And my crazy tail let him. The last straw was when he put a chain on layaway and was bragging about the details on it. But I begged for over half the relationship to be taken places and do cute small things, and be surprised a little. He acted like he didn’t have the funds and acted confused that I expected that. I just wanted bare minimum and he couldn’t provide 😭 he was so caught up, we were to different and he had to go lol
Be aware as well of someone who just “appeases” you when you come to them with a concern. Appeasing is not resolving anything and it’s a sign of an avoidant person.
Coparenting and boundaries !!!!!! If the person who your dating can not set boundaries with the baby mom or dad it’s a red flag. Sometimes the baby mother or dad is still in love with the ex. They WILL TRY TO USE THE CHILDREN as a way to sabotage the new relationship that the ex is in.
This man I was with downplayed me in front of my face & I ignored it because I was desperate for a relationship. I’am now glad I’m not in that relationship anymore.
Some people who don't have good relationships with their family often resent you for healthy family relationships. Sometimes they try and isolate you from your family. This is the other extreme of what Tony mentioned.
Those unhealed spirits! I was doing this at one point of my life but so glad now I look at healthy families with joy and hope and pray for them and for me to build my own healthy family❤
I needed this at the age of 19 to Protect myself. I never learned this knowledge from my parents.... so Thank You Tony 🙏🏾 I'm looking forward to that book!
Sometimes partners do the opposite also and sabotage your fitness a huge 🚩. I’ve been there , the moment your in the gym getting healthy, omg there a baby on the way. Ladies be aware of this too. Great warning signs Mr.Gaskins
I've had one or two try and sabotage my "Me Time". If they're calling 5 minutes before they know you're about to take yourself out, that's a no go for me.
Haha! I dated a guy who complained about me wearing a scarf and glasses to bed, which he’d already knew then. But I didn’t complain about his jacked up teeth, because I loved him for him. Go figure!! And he thought he was fine too!
This is an excellent video and a blueprint singles. I co sign on all that is being said. Basically you want to align yourself with someone who shares your core values and morals. I let someone go and told him I was not interested in seeing him anymore after second date when I found out he had poor ambition and not a good relationship with his parents. Poor or no relationships with your parents means you probably won't have a good relationship with me either. Goodbye.
Did he explain why he didn’t have a relationship with his family? Some people have very dysfunctional family members so it’s not always a red flag unless there is a reason.
What if they had to isolate from toxic parental upbringing? Have you ever been raised by narcissist parents? God commands not to be unequally joked with unbelievers, and that includes unbelieving family.
On a side note for all who is reading this. 'SIT WITH YOUR SPIRIT LISTEN TO IT" that is the truest story told. I had that revelation this Monday. When Tony say it, it is not just for show. Its real business. Just my testimony
Unfortunately I know all too well regarding boundaries. I really like this particular guy, however, I already see that if we were to get into a relationship he probably wouldn't be able to set boundaries with the mothers of his children. I just decided to step aside to avoid getting my feelings hurt or getting too deep involved.
Tony, everything you are saying is what I just walked away from. It was a bad relationship, it was the verbal abuse for me. I don't have the time or the patience anymore, cause one thing love cannot or never be is unsure.
I wish I had known about you years ago Tony. The last two men in my life had every red flag you talked about. Every single one. But now I know, and I won't make that mistake ever again. Thank you Tony.
All this is very true!! I just did a 2 part series talk with similar points speaking to both men and women so we get on the same page and understand what's required to have a healthy relationship. I believe being equally yoked in morals, values, principles and standards is key as well. Being single is not curse, it's a blessing and a time to take care of you and your life. Great video🙏
I know that’s going to be a learning experience! Can’t wait for the 60 and over class 🙏💕Be blessed🙏💕I did not have this knowledge in my 20’s so young ladies believe Tony when he tells you 🙏💕
Bro Tony, am so grateful for this single / Ready videos they are truly a blessing very informative. Am learning alot so much wisdom. God Bless you 🙏🏾❤️
It’s true. Had a guy friend after years, when I was drunk ask if I wanted to hook up. It sobered me up quickly, it was a shock. Said no and never bought it up again.
@@skyfall1481 wow. It was scummy that he waited until you were drunk to ask that, hoping the alcohol would inhibit your judgement. Now he's hoping you just don't remember it. He'll try it again in the future if you keep him around. He's only hoping that you'll change your mind in the future. That's the only thing he's waiting around for. That's been the experience with EVERY ONE of my past male friends.
Thank you for this video. It confirmed a elegant dismissal I had to do to a gentlemen. After the conversation my spirit would not sit still. That morning my mind would not sit still. I know I had to make that our first and last conversation.
Tony, what you do for this world is a blessing. If people tapped into what you are saying, we would be so much more well off. Thank you for what you do.
Spot on:) Thank you for your honesty. Your wisdom has helped me with my personal life and my work life. The bible tells us that God's people are destroyed for a lack of knowledge. Thank you again for the continued knowledge.
You be preaching and I love it!!! I always thought I was selfish for not tolerating anyone I date to have female friends kus I don’t believe in that! You just confirmed everything I stand on the entire video!!!! ❤love it
Wow! Sigh this is almost a validation but also sad one that I picked the wrong guy. My ex husband within a week of us dating become friends with a girl that was friends with his ex girlfriend. I figured it was nothing but they starting going to movies and dinner together where he paid. I was so confused like what was happening here. He kept telling me he wasn’t her type and I said women don’t talk to men about emotional stuff and not eventually catch feelings. Long story short. I found some damning texts where I love you was exchanged and it’s going to be easier now that we’re not in the same state. He was in Florida with her for the first year of our relationship while I lived in Ohio before we moved to a different state for his job. Fast forward 6ish years later, divorced and there were signs he entertained another woman as well. Found condoms in his car which was very usual for him to carry. I was very green when I met him. I’m from a strict African background so lessons like these were not thought to me. I knew it was an issue but he made me feel I was being insecure about him having female friends.
I have a male best friend since 2000. Never crossed boundaries & when he’s with or I’m with someone we respect boundaries. I have had so called friends males who have definitely tried me. To each their own. Some truth, but I have several male friends strictly platonic. It’s doable, but respect is definitely the foundation of true friendship with anyone. ❤️ great video💌
This is soooo good! Wish I had this knowledge 20 years ago!! Please listen to Tony about the “too much closeness with family/no privacy and if y’all have a difference in fitness ideas.” It sounds trivial but it’s not. Taking this advice will save you from a divorce or marrying the wrong person. You and your partner really have to like each other’s “habits” to be able to live together long term. Please don’t ignore this message.
Wow this taught me so much. I had no idea I was being discouraging by telling my ex he looked fine but he could hit the gym or I loved his hair but he should get a haircut 😔 I’m so glad I was able to learn the right way to do it 😭 kinda wish I knew this sooner but I’m glad I know now! God bless you Tony Gaskins 🙏🏽
Every single word you have said is true.but oh gosh I just couldn't stop laughing because it's the way you say it.i just love your accent it's great.thank you for a very honest and very true video let me just add this too I understand fully what you are saying to us women absolutely nothing that you have said can be misconstrued in any way shape or form!peace and love 💛👏
FUN. You wanna laugh, they say ain't nothing funny. You want to see the world, they don't wanna step outside the city limits. They are actually content doing nothing. Which to each their own. But if you know you enjoy getting out, pay attention if they do not. Tony you can add that to your book but when you do send me a check, LOL! I'm joking!