I understand and agree with how you explain the dysfunction of the system. However, Robyn is a master manipulator, and most, including me, believe she only wanted Kody and the TLC show, and Kody physically and emotionally abandoned 3 of his wives when Robyn entered the picture. So isn't that more about the people than the dysfunction of the system or a combination? I believe Robyn went into this wanting to manipulate Kody into abandoning the rest of his family for her and her kids. I also find it interesting that Kody became angry, sad, depressed, etc., when he started spending most of his time with Robyn. Shouldn't he be happy and loving life because he's spending the large majority of his days/life with Robyn, the good, faithful, loyal wife. But he's miserable and actually says on the show he hates his life. I believe if Robyn was out of the picture Kody would also make amends with and apologize to his kids and have a relationship with them. Robyn is pulling the strings.
I think its important to remember that we 'come onto the scene' when Robyn does. We don't see all of the struggles and fights prior to Robyn. We are only told what they're willing to tell us. They've gone public not only to move put of secrecy but also to normalise it as 'just another way to have a family like everyone else'. To do that, they can't have a candid 'warts and all' approach. 0 The reason we see it with Robyn is TLC has their own agenda, as much as the families want to hide their dysfunction, the network has a vested interest in the drama.
@kristalcampbell3650 No doubt it was dysfunctional prior to Robyn. However, the now 3 divorced wives have told the audience everything changed when Robyn entered the picture, kody was unequal with his time, preferring Robyn and Robyns kids. Even Kody tells the audience things changed when Robyn came into the family, he finally fell in love and found his soul mate.
I dont think she was in love with Kody when she married him, i think she was just in love with the lifestyle she would have. I think she loves him but not in love with him.@TracyC88
I agree with all of this 100%. Robyn wears the pants in that family. The other wives and children have said that he is not the same husband/ father that he used to be and they don't recognize this monster he has become. Robyn has turned him into a perpetual victim just like she is. She has turned him against every single person in his family ( except her and her brood) and she has him convinced that she's the innocent one that's being mistreated and " bullied" by everyone else. She's also kept her kids separated from all the others, in order to manipulate Kody further so she can lie and say that now her kids aren't being accepted by the family, which is another big fat lie. She plays the damsel in distress so Kody can swoop in and save her. She is so evil and selfish.
…after everything that’s happened in the last 3 years especially …Does Kody see the truth of his actions or does he truly blame everybody else for the family’s demise?
This episodes hits so much worse when you findout later that Kody took back his wedding ring to Meri and had it melted down . She here she is buying a ring for a new wife after hers was taken.
I come from another, high pressure background, and I just want to say I appreciate your compassion for other people still stuck in the lie they are still in.
Robyn was barely raised mormon. And kody was not raised with Poligamy until he was an adult when he returned from his mission and his father adopted it. At least this is my understanding. So it is difficult for me to accept that him and Robyn had this ingrained in them . More like both are narcissist. Imo
I’m so thankful to hear someone advocating for the people! They all need so much love grace and healing! You are a gift to your family.. this is so refreshing to hear. I used to really enjoy the show then it just made me really sad. Beautiful people who have been destroyed by an evil system. I still have hope for them.
I appreciated so much of what you said. What stood out to me most was when you said those feelings of jealousy and anger were their own internal boundaries warning them that something was really wrong. That has always stood out to me about “jealousy” in polygamy. It has always seemed to me like a natural and healthy response to such an appalling situation. I agree with you that the system needs to be dealt with; the individuals caught up in it need compassion.
I appreciate this more insider view of polygamy, thank you for doing these videos. I'm from a orthodox, cultish Mormon family and people don't understand how much this affects the psyche in multiple generations. When you're indoctrinated from infanthood to see the world in a certain way, it takes a lot of strength, compassion, professional help and time to even see that you're in a system, let alone unwind these conditioned ways of thinking. So awesome you've done the work Benjamin! New sub here!
As someone who knows virtually nothing about cults & Mormonism personally I just want to thank you for pointing out the difference between the system & the people indoctrinated in that system. Thank you Ben 🕊️
You have an amazing spirit. I love your perspective because it is personal. And I love how you point out what is the same for everyone in the cult vs.the family straying from the norm a bit. Very interesting.
You have a very intelligent, engaging, honest & logical presentation style. You know much more about your own ex religion & family than viewers do, of course, but keep watching. Robyn pulls Kody away (or he decides himself with her) from his original 13 children & 3 wives. Those 13 children were yearning for their father. It's pretty evil to abandon your own children. Is that common in the AUB? Leaving your OG family of 20+ years in favour of the latest interest?
You never have to apologize or feel guilt about the disfunction that was passed down for generations. It’s not the people who practice this that are bad or evil. I believe you that it is the system of polygamy
Christine explains how difficult it was to have a hospital birth. She had just had a miscarriage with her pregnancy before Truly and because of that and her age, it was recommended that she have Truly in the hospital. So Christine was not only paranoid about the cops and CPS (we call it child protective services in Canada) but she was also nervous because she was having a high risk pregnancy that required her to agree to a hospital birth. My heart broke, and i got Mama Bear angry when Kody and Robyn were smooching before he finally made his way back to the hospital. What an ass.
200 years? Codys parents joining the cult was a lie? You surely must know what the fans of this reality show thinks about Codys hair. The extreme high hairline and thinning hair combo is generally not a good look for a ponytail. If you are clowning us please continue 😂
I understand how you could be therapy after living in a world like that but I love how you said so matter-of-factly yeah because of you know the therapy that I need desperately…..😆 you’re awesome Benjamin Cody needs some gaslighting serious gaslighting
Interesting that he appeared to give his children the freedom to pursue education and to choose their path as opposed to now when it appears he controls Robyns daughters and they have such a different life Perhaps at some point he thought he might have made a mistake with his kids and changed tack Or it could be the difference in the wives approach to raising their children is very different from og3 to Robyn ?
;) subbed, nice to see you on you tube, I been watching since the start, and wow lots of tells, so when you get to the adoption Kody's voice over say's "We been working on this 5 or 6 years" do the math that put it to when Kody was driving to see Robyn and that "covenant" in season 18 happened "before" Kody married Robyn. so what the heck did they talk about. Everyone needs love, not just people in a cult or whatever, also I think Kody's family was "different" being they left the "church" So you really can't hold the same standard of Keep sweet and all this cause they left. Kody's behavior rotten behavior was long after he left the church, heck he was grown before even getting in this cult, so he knows he was well aware of how to behave. He said so his self when he said He should just be the devil, well he all ready was,,, as he said to Janell's boys "bye bye" on TV yet Robyn's adults still at home, please you can't sugar coat the religion on those out of the religion to excuse their rotten behavior ,,,,
So unimportant I know... but Kody's eye colour??🤣🤣. Do you know if he has blue or brown eyes? People say as the seasons progressed he became more hostile and his eyes went from blue to almost black. Honestly, it's hotly debated 🤣
I love you and your honest opinions. I think it’s wonderful and important so the rest of us can understand. But, I kind of don’t agree with something’s you’ve said. But, we can all agree to disagree and still be cool. But , anyway. We all have free will even in Brigham Young taught that. So yes, i agree you all need help to overcome what you were taught your whole lives. But, people who know the rules, know right from wrong. And still do it because they think they are above the rules are wrong. Like last video. Kissing ect before marriage. We all seen it. So ?? Does Kody think he is above the laws you all were taught? Or Robyn ? The rest of the ladies follow the rules! Just saying. This is my own opinion. I hope you don’t block me. I love your insight.
One thing you might want to reexamine is your family's connection to polygamy. Your grandparents joined the AUB. As a side note, I highly doubt they or Kody received teachings or guidance. Just appropriated the cult's beliefs on an as-needed basis. Love your content!
Loving your content. I’m hoping to see more colabs with some of our other sister wives community creators. You’re doing an amazing job of making it all make sense.
Nah, no collaboration. Most are too long and the fact that he came from the AUB makes him unique. I would hate for his unique perspective could get garbled with others.
I would love to see you merge your love for therapy/healing and your vast knowledge of polygamy and other harmful structures by reviewing books like it didnt start with you from a polygamy/mormon lens.
I have to say I disagree with ypur assessment about Kody being blindsided. As time goes on he continues to claim to be blindsided by things the wives say and do, but it's on tape that they have repeatedly told him. I've definitely yelled at him saying, "She's been telling you that for ages!" I think it's more a matter of Kody doesn't listen or Kody doesn't care. Also, it may be a function of generations of programming, but according to Kody, he only became a polygamist when he returned from his mission to find his dad had become one. Mormonism in general is a cult (my opinion) sure, but his behavior in polygamy is egregious and he wasn't raised in a polygamist household/ to be a polygamist. At least that's the narrative they've been selling. How does that line up with it being a system thing vs a Kody thing? Genuinely curious.
I watched a clip of you saying that you’ve been impressed by the writing of that guy, Yuval Noah Harari, I’m curious to what your thoughts on God are now…
You say that the system is to blame.So how do you explain the fact that Kodys was late in joining the polygamist side of Mormonism? And not being responsible for that choice?And all other choices after that?And you yourself leaving this system that has so much control?Ultimately we as humans have free will.That must never be set aside.Or evil has gained traction.
Oh…saying how there is always someone with authority over you… 💔❤️🩹💔 I’m LDS, some think I’m not a good LDS because I will say no to a calling (a job you do in church like teach Sunday School, etc). We’re told we’re to say yes and do it regardless. I can’t do that. And hearing you make the point about authority… ug… I’m in my 50’s and working hard at letting go of certain ways of thinking… I’m not less than. I’m my own person. Thank you for your insights and ability to speak.
