Siblings Still Living At Home 

Instablaster.

fake news!

I've seen this as well. They struggle horribly because their parents did nothing to prepare them.

The barrio can be just like this

That's what happens. They won't move unless they are FORCED to!

I have a 50+ relative still living with mom and dad. Never held more than part time jobs. It's pretty pathetic.

how often do u talk to your extended famikly in china?

I'm Nigerian and 24 years old. My situation is similar but not as extreme. Non western parents want their kids to stay at home for some reason

Fascinating.. what kinda of chinese r u? Han? Tibetan?

Kenny aka TI Not just non-Western. I'm black American, and my family was the exact same way.

You did right, and it's great you're making it on your own.

I worked since I was 14 but I wasnt preparing to be and adult :(

I have 3 brothers like that living at home. The 33 year old one never left and is emotionally attached to mom for everything. And he throws a fit if his clothes food is not done. Im like do it yourself.

I am 29 , and my unemployed brother (27) is living with my parents... getting a wage from my father to help in the family farm. No independence, never had to support himself one day in his life... it drives me insane.

Woah I never thought of enablers as bein "abusive". But I guess in a very selfish way they dont want that other person to be independent and self sufficient.

What will happen when "Mum" is no longer around?

Not nice but abusive... Never thought of it that way but so true!

😂 like wtfudge!

Did you get the house, alimony and child support in the divorce?

@@KhoalBishop I don't think they got married

I’m going through the same thing. I left at 18 came back, left and now I’m back. I’m 21 and was telling my mom I want to move out again and said if I do I can’t come back again.

For me it’s just hard leaving your younger sibling with all the memories you made

@@gtmusica You have to set an example for your younger siblings. It's time to launch yourself into the world and become your own person, apart from your parents and siblings. It's time to prepare to grow up and possibly create your own family unit in time. It's not the time to look back, it's time to go forward and be an adult. I know it's scary, I was on my own at 17, I was still in high school. Yeah I was scared, but I was brave enough to do it, had a job, paid rent, but I had the freedom to shape my own life, and after looking back I was never sorry for it. It served me well to be self reliant emotionally, money wise, and in every other way. My brother was on his own at 16. It's not like my parents didn't care, they just let us go when we wanted to, because they raised us to be independent.

@@gtmusica I did the same thing, I circled back to the nest once and then remembered why I left so early in the first place. Never went back again. I guess my parents did grow me up.

@@pjgumby I needed to hear this. Thank you

wow that's insane

😳😳😳

Give me this is not true for a thousand

How messed up can people's lives get?

agreed. I'm turning 24 in a couple of months, living at home but I just graduated college and am working full time as a software developer while I pay off my 72K in student debt

Or if there 36

@MITLOML most Spanish house holds like mine we stay with the parents even after 25 because of saving up money plus if the parents don’t care it’s a win win.

@MITLOML no, 25 is still young. Currently 21, I’m not moving out till about 30 or so when I get married. Gotta save/invest money

Some birds don't make it, it's true.

Hahahaha 25 people who have their 50 year old children living with them.

Jack Cannon my man.

Good for you. Do you like truck driving?

DD is considering it.

DD? Dead daughter?

I moved out at 18 married less than a yr later did our stupidness and also became truck drivers (have been for 6 yrs) now following D.R. and getting our stupidness paid currently bs2 but goal for Nov to be bs3

So it's ok for you to not pay rent or a mortgage but ok for your parents while you get to stockpile money? That sounds lovely.

With your parents subsidizing your (rent) expenses you are not fully financially independent. Your parents are still fronting the bill, even if only in part. Some adult children and parents may willfully choose to prolong the adolescence period in an effort to "help" but not everyone wants to (or should).

@@Bindi_Marc this doesn’t make sense. U lived in your parents house for 18 years, they paid mortgage or rent, it’s not bam once your 18 your causing them more money. Your staying in the same room not costing them anymore. And this guys is pay utilities and food so it’s not like he’s burdening his parents.

+jcb3393 Same parents does not mean the same upbringing. Every parent with more than one child has a favorite child weather they realize it or not. In some family's it gets really bad. It gets really really bad when one of the children is the scapegoat for the rest of the family.

Influence comes from more adults than just parents. Many of my friends' parents, my teachers, and adults in my church also raised me right. :)

Come from a similar situation... there was nooo place for me anymore so I HAD to move out, didn't even had the option to stay.

D T you are the lucky one

I think a lot of it has to do with external influences. There are others that influence kids beyond the parents. Their friends. Teachers. Adult role models (Pastor, Scout leader, Coach, et al). Some of the most influential people in my young life have never met my younger siblings.

WOW, really?

pjgumby He thinks?!!!!

Sorry to hear.

Marlena Bontas Mom allows to go on in the home!!!

Yes. My uncle but he works and maintains her property and contributes.

🤦‍♀️

19 and going to college is not that dysfunctional Esme :)

Was about to say the same. Ideally you should work while in college but sometimes it's hard specially if you're a STEM major

Weird. Asians do often live communally, but everybody works!

@@grayandgray yes, weird, nobody works and they all live off my parents in law's retirement... and just to clarify, the only Asian in there is the sister in law, the rest of them are all Americans.

Yes.. he's jealous

What happens if Mom dies is that these two are going to find themselves utterly without the emotional or physical resources to support themselves, and trying to find a job when you're in your 30s and haven't worked is next to impossible. These two will have to try to get on some sort of disability and prove that they are too emotionally fragile to work. Or they can try to find another relative to take over their support besides their brother who isn't going to you can bet. I have extended family with a similar situation that I worry about night and day.

the sister will find a sucker to marry her. the brother will be forced to get a steady job.

modap3000 Such insight. You have it right on the dime.

Ericka Williams this is my younger sister all the way.

Lee Leonard if she’s pretty she can find a man if she really needs to. That was the plan of several of my high school classmates - get married, never work a day.

That's exactly right.. he's jealous.. can hear it in his voice..

​@@jaredgoldberg4055No he is not. They are taking advantage of their mom who is working herself to an early grave.

@@cookiegirl2cookie197yes this is the answer people can’t seem to understand! It’s heartbreaking watching aging parents being bled dry and taken advantage of

I think the caller needed someone else [an outsider] to validate the fact that what was going on with his siblings was insane. I have an extended family member who is in her mid 20s and never held a job, failed the certification for her degree program and quit the only job she's had after 4 hours. Her future is bleak, and it troubles me thinking of what's going to happen to her in the years to come. Currently she and her chronically ill mother are being supported by the elderly grandmother, but what they'll do when she can no longer afford it is something I worry about probably more than they do.

My impression: he heard the caller's resentment and jealousy and moved to stomp it hard. Dave wanted to remind him that's nothing to envy, even if your 8 year old self pokes his whiny head up.

Hysterical. Share the video with her and have her read the comments. Listen if your son gets a job and is chipping in or saving towards his own place then that’s different

No, plenty of people get a job and live on their own.

lovethemflowers this is true yes. But what if this job you are speaking of doesn't pay enough to live on? What happens then? And the point I'm trying to make is 2 incomes are better than one.

Gee Cee That would be just as bad, because chances are, they will carry over that same behavior ( lying around the house, not helping with cooking and cleaning, etc.) over to their significant other's place.

Gee Cee I'm 24 and just moved out. Would love to find a wife but I don't need one to financially support myself.

Can your sister be put in a care home?

By the way, while I may not have the facts right, unless my sister is able to afford to live in that house on her 2-4 jobs or if my mother pumps in money, I expect that there will be a tax sale in less than a year. My sister knows nothing about home ownership, maintenance and costs. I’d asked my mother several times, before this turn of events, to tell my sister about the property taxes. She didn’t want to. Go figure.

Ehh its how western society is they put up this big notion that "you have to move out at 18 & be independent". Okay but do you know the situation this person is maybe people want their parents with them to take care of them Cuhz they took care of you, it's not a bad thing at all. Family is always there to help yet some people don't have a good family.. So many factors go into a certain persons life oh well what can we do lol.

I have a family friend who lived with his parents until he was 40 simply because he wasn't married & is incredibly frugal. When he moved out he bought a house for cash. He's now married & was able to retire at 55 as a multi millionaire. Not for everyone, but it sure did work for him!

maryyellen LOL thanks for sharing that mary - cool story!

one of his first questions is "do they not work?"...obviously your case is different...

So long as you contribute to maintaining the household by paying rent or taking over paying other bills, I see no problem with your situation. The issue with the caller is that his siblings did nothing and contributed nothing. Like Dave said, they were basically still acting like teens. What's going to happen to them if their mother drops dead or loses her job and they have no job skills? Chances are the siblings are either introverts, shy or something like that where they don't want to leave the nest, but the mother's enabling them to postpone getting their own life is a huge disservice to them.

+GetTheGrandFunkOut Embarrassment? Why care what other people think of you?

+Clayton Crider I actually LISTEN to videos before I comment. Adam begins at :54: "It -- It kind of wears on me and it has been over the years because I've always worked since I was a teenager, and I'm 32. I have my own house, I've actually -- this is my second house that I'm in, you know, I live -- another state away. But I -- I feel a little resentment...." The discussion that follows proves Adam is not feeling a little resentment, but a lot of EMBARRASSMENT, which is the state of being caused to feel self-conscious or ill at ease, disconcerted. Dave qualifies this incorrectly applied emotion at 1:15: "I wouldn't feel resentment, I would feel pity!" which is sorrow or grief aroused by the misfortune of another: compassion for suffering; and is synonymous with commiseration, sympathy, condolence and empathy. EMBARRASSMENT in its truest sense is pity with no solution. But observe, please, how Dave's lengthy empathetic response to Adam's subject then proceeds to reflect every bit of Adam's EMBARRASSMENT back to him over his stuck older brother and sister and the mother that has kept them emotionally stunted for 36 years. Now, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to subtract the 36-year-old brother and 31-year-old sister's present-day circumstance of still living in their mother's house from their failure to have moved out on their own 18 and 13 years earlier to deduce all I have in my response. Also, could Dave in all his commiseration, sympathy, condolence and empathy offer Adam a solution to the mother that has thrown her older son and daughter's lives away on her stronger need to remain mama to minor children and the stunted siblings that have permitted her? Nope. Like I said: EMBARRASSMENT over which Dave could only offer Adam useless pity. So, for you applying the logical workings of my mind to suggesting I speak of my own circumstance of being a 36-year-old man or a 31-year-old woman still living in my mother's house by asking me why care what other people think of me proves you too dumb first to ask if I'm a 36-year-old man or a 31-year-old woman!

HOKIES GAMING lol

Wonder where Dad is in all this ......

+Vydio That's beside the point. These kids should have left home a long time ago. Whether dad is in the picture or not doesn't change that. How can a person feel like an independent adult while still living at home? In my opinion, they can't.

That does not matter if the Dad is there. They are not kids. they need to go!!!

Exactly! They better hope she outlives them!

They might be log to live off the caller. Hopefully he'll tell them to buzz off.

pjgumby so true lol

pjgumby Like something out of "Law & Order SVU". Doink, doink!

then the kids will inherited the house and money..

@@terence.j why?