What has been your experience in dealing with a jealous/insecure manager? Check out my Toxic Boss series in this playlist: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-4TFkwsBA9Ws.html
I am quitting my job tmrw, because of #4. I went from the top performer to someone who can’t do anything right. I was placed on a PIP on my day off without my boss even telling me, and my boss only did it because she knows it disqualifies me from a position in another department.
@@lavenderrbleu That’s so unprofessional, placing you on PIP can’t be done on your day off. It is supposed to be communicated/discussed with you immediately. You are making the right decision. When are you quitting?
Micromanagement, gaslighting my intelligence, devaluing, projecting oppression, ignoring my accomplishments and glorifying and praising other's acts who have accomplished far less than me for the company.
My last boss didn’t have a degree or anything remotely related to classes. Just “experience “ which in addition is optimal but he knows that his mismanagement is reaching the end because he’s been exposed!! It was cronyism that promoted him and it backfired lol. And his arrogance helped but eventually the tree will bear the fruit of incompetence….
You deal with them by leaving them. It’s that simple. Life’s too short to not be appreciated and respected. Doesn’t matter your job title, doesn’t make you above anyone!
That's exactly what my daughter did today. She also found herself another job already. Better opportunities and more pay. It's very sad how common this is. Blessings to all.
I had a boss very like this. After a year he began working to get me fired, write ups, "counselling". But thankfully HIS superiors were aware of my work and in the end, HE was fired.
I and my boss had a confrontation. I asked him what he does not like about me: He said that he does not like that I always want to be perfect and to be star, that I try do so much. I don't really know where that came from. I never thought taking initiative and having attention to detail would be deemed as negative.
I want to add something to #2. Sometimes the boss won’t ignore your feedback or suggestions but try to take credit for them without recognizing you as the originator. Protect your own intellectual property 🧠
This happened to me when my boss took my idea and made it their own and got the credit. I left very soon after. I feel pitty for someone who uses others ideas to get ahead.
Having a toxic boss will ruin your motivation and slowly, step by step, you will turn yourself into spiritless office coworker that barely can be seen in some corner in the office. Don’t try to prove your point and try to make someone be something that the person is not capable of. Pack your bags as soon as you notice any sign of jealousy etc. you should not be afraid of being great or should hide your talents for the sake of someone’s poor confidence. Grab that life and elegantly close that door. I’m rooting for you!
@danicajovanovic You don’t have to run or pack your bags, why do you have tongo if you’ve been there for a long time just because of someone’s insecurities. No way!! I’m a nice guy, a good guy, but I’m the type that if you feel that way and I’m a great employee, and you try to get me fired, I will make your life miserable, and I don’t care if you’re the boss, on every little thing I will challenge you and o will humiliate you with class, and I know how to do that very well. If he or she has any sense they will back off, which is mostly what happens with me, it’s exactly what happened in this job I have now. If was a great employee, respectful, hard working and everything, with my mistakes too, nobody’s perfect, but mostly try to get along with everybody, but since I’m not the type that talks a lot, or gets cozy with with co-workers they tried to make my life miserable, and since they took that approach I then decided I was going to treat them the same way they treated me, thank God they got the message, now I think they’ve seen their not so nice ways and left me alone. So defend yourself, as long as your right, always speak up, that’s only way to get respect in this cold and cruel world.
What companies don't understand is how much damage is done by management like this. Everyone is walking on eggshells. Co-operation and trust break down, which in turn affects the organisation's productivity. Projects take longer to deliver, tacit knowledge is lost when good employees resign and the company falls behind the competition or just becomes unprofitable.
I think my boss has realized I am too smart for the job and it annoyed him. I do the work fast and am secretely looking for new work and have another job
There is very little chance of reconciliation with such a person. Either they fire or you quit. Finally be glad to be out of this confidence crushing rut.
My manager is having sleepless nights because of me, she so threatened by my presence....I thought of leaving but the moment I discovered why she is picking on me, I decide Iam not going anywhere, I will see this to the end🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Me too! My manager started a few months after me, knew nothing. Spent the first months learning the job from me, then switched and became a toxic, rude and dismissive nightmare. I’m also one of the most liked and successful people at my firm.
My boss is exactly like this. I tried to be friendly with her and take her ideas as guidance but she became even nastier and way more controlling and disrespectful. I wanted to tell the general manager but she refuses to give me any emails or phone number of him. Tomorrow I'm quitting. Because no one and no job deserves us to endure disrespect and hatred.
@@devadii24 i quit because right after, the work stress became more and more unsupportable and i discovered, despite her giving me wrong info, old files and talking nasty with me infront of my colleagues, she was giving me a technician's tasks and taking the design tasks for her self. I confronted her and she even started humiliating me so I went straight forward to the general manager. Fortunately i got his number from my friend she used to work for him. After this my boss got scared from me finding his contact directly and they called me back to work with them like 2 or 3 times but I refused because i no more had the confidence or the motivation to work with such person. Fortunately they gave me my money and I resigned.
I don’t disagree nobody should be to be subject to being belittled or being treated as if there’s something wrong with you I’m going to the same thing at my job my STM Store manager is a very condescending and rude person
My boss tried to make me quit, he kept just wanting me out of the company. I couldn't take it anymore and left and thank god I did. Making more money and couldn't be happier with my team and the HR staff.
@@myemmotion same like my boss..always want me to quit and she try everything that she can so that I am out of the company..and she managed to do that..now I am in 2 month notice..
My boss told me straight up that I think I'm better than her and cocky during an assesment meeting because I don't speak much and don't like casual talk.In addition to that, she extended my probation period and constantly looking micromanaging me at my job.I'm quitting my job as soon as I get another job opportunity. Wish me luck
Same here man!!! My probation period extended for 3 months. It's a no win situation, no matter how you try to prove that you are trying your best as a fresher to keep up with this corrupt system.
Insecurity is a primary motivator of narcissism. The chaos and control are all coping mechanisms to keep their artificial reality from cracking. Becoming an obstacle to your best qualities gives them breathing room to outwork you without the same obstacles placed on themselves, which then feeds their ego that you are not as good as they are. Questioning any of these processes, no matter how obviously inefficient, is a punishable offense and they relish that opportunity to reprimand you for questioning said process.
That's a brilliant analysis which I completely agree with. As you said, these people are insecure and they would do anything so it would never show. Just in general, those who always expect others to feed their ego can be extremely insecure. Someone confident doesn't have these urges and needs.
I think it is naive to think by putting a lot effort to validate your boss’s authority could ever change an insecure manager’s mind. You will just get bullied more and more. It is time to walk away, competent individuals will never worry about jobs.
tried the friend thing, she wasn't having it. It is best to quietly leave and do it in a professional manner. Try to stay there till you got a new job and is already signed on and ready to work over there.
That is exactly what I did, leave. You highlighted all the signs except one, paranoia. Once they know you are on to them and will not take their bullying, they try to be extra sugary and buy you gifts until the next time you get recognized by the company for being great! It is emotionally draining and you can’t win. You know your worth. Get out!
Dealt with this at my last job. My boss only got promoted bc he's friends with the VP and been there the longest out of the whole team. He was extremely unqualified, very incompetent and ignorant. He saw me as a threat bc I was completing my masters degree and could end up making more than him. A woman making more than him was a big no no. So he used a beef I had going on with two equally incompetent, ignorant employees to fire me. It was beyond fucked up, but since I've done nothing wrong, I didn't lose no sleep over it. I now got a better job, fully remote, and I get to work with a previous co worker who was also unfairly fired by this same boss. God is great ❤
Thanks. I just continue to be a rock star everyday regardless of my bad director. I was once told, shine so much that it will be hard not to be noticed and make sure to never stop learning. I wake up every morning, knock out everything thrown at me like a rock star and keep the mindset that if a company or boss wants to get rid of you, all you can do is be ready and accept the day it comes. At the end, I get the winning end cause I get to update my resume with all kinds of valuable information.
@@larryg7752 So far it helped me cause I was going through a rough patch with said director and when I was on the way out, due to the skills obtained, I was hired to a 100% remote job within the same company in a different dept. doing tasks that are way less stressful. Been a year and loving it... plus my manager now provides me the chance to learn all skills within dept and giving me a leg up on the next promotions.... we'll see how that goes in April next year.
I am early in my career and have climbed the ladder quite quickly. I am 26, and when I get promoted I will be a manager. I have found that many of my supervisors/managers typically are toxic individuals and this spills into their work style. Often times they get intimidated by my ideas or do not give me credit. I always believe that everyone can succeed together, and I am a team player. I learned that this is not the case, and some people just have issues. As you mentioned, do not respond negatively as this empowers them and they will never take credit for their mistakes. Let your work speak for itself, and always do your best! That is enough unto itself!
#2 and #3 were just too obvious, he ignored me and avoided me but didn't waste a chance to attack me in front of others.The bonus sign is also SOOO true.Great video, thank you!
My manager does the same thing literally 5 months after working he said he was jealous of me when I first came there, because he thought the girl he likes would like me💀 and I could tell he still is. He would talk sh** Infront of people but when I act defensive he says he’ll never get mad at me lmaooo
This is a tough dynamic to deal with. Once your boss recognizes that their skills are waning (most middle managers are unnecessary in today's businesses. They are just political stakes in the org) they will do these things. All of them.
I tried to have a reasonable conversation with my supervisor about her behavior toward me, however she snapped and tried to intimidate me instead of listening. She was unable to maintain eye contact with me during that conversation and ended up walking out of our office. I could tell she did that to make me look like the villain
You just explained my situation and my boss EXACTLY to the T. I've been Soo stressed out about this. She has clouded the upper boss. The upper boss compliments me all the time, she gets very jealous. I also noticed that he won't do it in front of her. She controls everything and all employees appear to be afraid of her. They are suck ups with her. I am not the type to earn respect or acknowledgement by sucking up. I earn my way. I always have but this is a first for me. She protects all the wrong people rather than the good ones . Very hypocritical and sneaky. The upper boss seems to be under her control as well. She sits at his desk, while he sits on the side chair 😂 God I feel so helpless!! Thank u for the advice. Gonna be a tough one! 🤯
Damn. This video was spot on. I've had tons of insecure professors and bosses before and you're right, you need to re-assure them in their leadership abilities. They want validation too.
My supervisor displays every one of these signs. She's so threatened by me it hurts her. She knows I out-qualify her and tries her best to undermine me. My boss loves me and raves about my work, which infuriates her more. She's on the warpath but knows to tread lightly because she knows I'm not afraid of her. I'm the only one not afraid of her actually and it kills her that she can't control me like the others. I'm working on leaving though but on my terms.
Dealing with this exact situation right now. I don’t really want to leave the job, it’s the “super”visors and managers that make everything unbearable.
Hi, Im 27F - In my 8 years of working in this lifetime, only now did I come across a female boss who seems like she doesn’t like me. She’s not blatantly mean to me or anything but she treats me differently than others. I pride myself with my work ethic so I think it’s not that I’m underperforming or not delivering. All of my other higher ups express their praise at me but with her it’s just a different vibe… sometimes I even get ignored in the groupchat but she replies to other with those fun looking emojis, lol. I’ve been pondering on this for a few weeks now and maybe a stranger’s perspective will help shed light to it. Thanks!
I genuinely feel like I am good at my job and I know everything I’m doing but my boss complains and picks on me all the time and makes me feel not good enough. Literally nothing can please and when she’s around I can’t seem to do anything right with her.
I seriously just had this experience, yesterday. It felt like she hired me just to demoralize me. Week 1, I noticed something weird about her. I asked her if she's having second thoughts about hiring me of course she says no. But she wld avoid me then later once she saw my capabilities and that I could take initiative, she changed. All of a sudden, if I was in the building I had to work right next to her. We were working on putting a new retail store together, from the ground up. So doors weren't open yet.. Im suppose to be a supervisor. All the other supervisors and managers are working with another team but I had to stay up under her for 8 hrs. If I even moved a hanger w/I she telling me, she wld tell me not to. and she'll talk down to me in front of people who are suppose to be working under me. I had a similar experience in the past, so I knew where this was going.I felt stifled so I left and I believe that that was the objective.
That did seem to be her goal. But why did she hire you in the first place?! Maybe she assumed you'd be "assisting" her without any initiative or without outshining her in terms of skills.
I had a coordinator/supervisor that was threatened by me..it was horrible. He would approach HR and ask if his attacks for the day would be OK or not.. he screwed himself going to HR, this toxic boss didn't get his contract renewed and got himself canned. I was so relieved when he was gone..then finally one by one everyone was relieved that he was gone.
What is really discerning for me is when I sit in my bosses office discussing anything… as I look around her office and see motivational picture phrases of her direction and being a woman and a placard on her desk that says BOSS LADY. Actually it best describes herself. Because she is the most rude, insecure, toxic, un tactful person I’ve met. Clearly NOT a leader! I can’t wait for my exit review!
I see the envy in my manager & coworkers but I don't care. When something needs to be done or questioned in order for me to continue with my execution of the job tasks, I still go to my manager for help showing him/her that I'm there to do my job, best it, get my pay & go home! It burns them up when I keep coming to them about other tasks.
Interesting. A boss that I worked for at a local authority up until about 20 years ago ticked all of the six points that you mentioned. He engendered a toxic atmosphere in the work place by treating people at the same grade differently and positively encouraging them to snitch, tittle tattle and back stab each other. It was reassuring for it to be confirmed that I experienced all of this because he was intimidated by me and wanted to crush my self confidence and not because I was crap at my job, which I knew I wasn't. The next boss I had working at the same authority was the complete opposite. She thought I was brilliant at my job and said I didn't need managing and she could always rely on me to complete work on or ahead of time and deal competently with the more challenging tasks without compromising on quality or volume. The first boss got his come uppance during a reorganisation where he was made redundant by stealth. Needless to say I didn't get an invite to his leaving do. Happy days.
had a manager that wouldnt give me a promotion without a real explanation, even when i pulled up the job description with examples of me meeting all of the expectations. ended up taking my list to the director and got a promotion immediately. Well, that put a target on my back for my manager and he used every opportunity to ignore my opinions, criticize my work, remain rude and distant, ignore my PTO requests and refuse to give me a bonus, after receiving the promotion. I realized that I can take my work elsewhere and now I'm happy with a higher paying job with less stress.
Sounds like the general workplace MO... Good to have a strong internal validation base. Be aware so that your 'aura' doesn't shrink, due to toxic dynamics; since this can stifle your joy, pride and development. to become the best version of you. If you stay clear and build yourself, you can actually grow in some regards, in an abrasive, toxic environment. But don't fool yourself, everything has a price.
I personally have one foot out the door, I'm ready to jump ship any minute. I don't have anything lined up but I'm also at a place where the environment has been toxic. Update: Looking at this video again, some of these signs were things that the owner and general manager did to me. They finally laid me off which was a blessing because I was ready to quit at any given moment even if I didn't have a job lined up.
Im dealing with 2 toxic bully bosses... They really do all these things ..i thought i was losing my mind because i dont understand why i was being treated like this. I did great at my job plenty of positive reviews and i was getting sabotaged for it. Now my hours are cut and im looking for another job.
Two of my old bosses were dating female employees. Those same female employees were also interested in me. My bosses soon started acting kind of weird around me.
Really appreciate this video, it's really painful learning these things in the corporate world. However it's so refreshing that I am not going crazy and there's a genuine reason for what I am seeing at work!
Omg thank you! 😭 This was my last manager to the T!! I tried to talk to them about it and all I got was empty promises to change and gaslighted. So glad I left.
You've done all the right steps. You've first tried your best to work things out and to improve communication between you. But as you've mentioned things only got further and worse. I hope your current work environment is good and that it stays this way. Always happy to see you around!
Exactly , my supervisor did that same thing to me. She would criticize in a mass text, but thank God I got another job, and now she would do anything for me to come back to work, but i work one day as relief. They hate when u speak up for yourself, they love when u suck up to them and be afraid of them.
Wow. Exactly. My colleagues don't talk to me. My boss throws any good thing I try to do away immediately! This includes an Incident Report folder which we still don't have - despite someone who fell on company grounds and was injured. She's very toxic.
I am sorry you are experiencing this. Sometimes it's a set up within the company which has been created by toxic leadership and it's impossible to make any change.
#1,4, and 6 is what I experienced at my last job and then got fired after just one month... I had never experienced these things in my other two jobs and that is how I knew that something was wrong. I had a personal trainer, in which after two weeks she told me that I am ready to be on my own, and how she saw great potential in me etc. But when my boss would talk to me she would say that we need to have a few more days of training and that she doesn't feel confident in me to be on my own. Also, my office was next door to my boss' office and I am able to over hear her in her meetings. She had two meetings on two different occasions, both meetings specifically based on me. I can hear how the opposite person suggested something but before they could finish, my boss interrupted and said, "no no she doesn't have purpose as an individual" along with many other things... My boss would have one on one meetings with just me and her, and she told me that I need to be more interactive, I need to be more involved in the chats (we had chats which was something created early covid before I got hired and when the job switch to remote/hybrid. It was a form to stay socialized within the work place.) She told me I need to smile more and then gave the example of looking dead by referencing to herself, but I know she was indirectly telling me that I look dead. Mind you, within the group meetings, everyone takes a turn to say something based on the topic at hand, in which you could say that we are all forced to talk; although, I did not mind talking at all and did not hesitate to take the spotlight and speak when it was my turn. I enjoyed working there, I always said hi to the lady at the front desk and to the ladies I went to orientation with. Anyways, being that I was only in the training process (for the entire month), why was she so focused on how I looked and me sending a good morning text or a "going to lunch" gif in the chats, more than she was with the training or the actual work that I got hired for? This was my first job in accounting field and the amount of excitement I had to get my first job after four years of college was very high. Although, because of what happened within that one month, now I question if accounting is for me....
thats how i felt about being something simple like a cashier. You should practice a bit more, regain your confidence and go back out there and find some real work accounting if that is what you want. Dont let people or thoughts in your head tell you otherwise. You go out there and conquer. Best of wishes to you. Shalom
I just got fired today after 1 month of work (2 weeks of training in a new field, 2weeks of work on my own). I read your story and I can picture myself there. I was ignored, excluded of the team for 2 weeks. It’s been 1 month of pressure on my mental health… Im going to be short and just say that we had quite the same experience. Very sad. I never lived a situation like this before. I lost all my personality, confidence there…
Hi, Im 27F - In my 8 years of working in this lifetime, only now did I come across a female boss who seems like she doesn’t like me. She’s not blatantly mean to me or anything but she treats me differently than others. I pride myself with my work ethic so I think it’s not that I’m underperforming or not delivering. All of my other higher ups express their praise at me but with her it’s just a different vibe… sometimes I even get ignored in the groupchat but she replies to other with those fun looking emojis, lol. I’ve been pondering on this for a few weeks now and maybe a stranger’s perspective will help shed light to it. Thanks!
There are additional and different signs as well. It will vary based on their own personality/character traits. Agression and vindictiveness will vary too. Usually when your gut is telling you something is up, something is up. If you have reached the end of your rope and have nothing to lose, its time to go over their head and attempt to initiate an alternate narrative for the situation. It might be the last thing you do but it can lead to changes and improvements for others down the road. And thats a positive effect on the universe.
My boss telling me you work excellent and flawless. Then said I want to tell you something but don't get me wrong there is another job somewhere else for a manager role and I think it is tailored for you. We want you here of course but we can't be selfish. I was laughing inside hahahah. I ain't leaving
The fact that your boss is giving you feedback and acknowledges your talent is actually very positive. From the little you’ve shared, maybe he suggests this for this personal gain, but I wouldn’t call him a toxic boss. You shall read some of the stories here about really horrible managers to notice the difference.
Thank you for this video. Each sign I am experiencing at my current position. I had a feeling my boss was threatened by my presence, but to recognize each of the signs you outlined, convinces me I was right. It helps me to deal with the attack and not let me internalize them.
MY boss befriends my other coworkers-- even literally calling them "friend", as in "see you later, friend! Love ya!", or speaks in Spanish to my coworkers who are Spanish, in front of the English-speaking coworkers, will ignore text messages from some coworkers while acknowledging others--even if the messages are pertaining to work.
I like the tips at the end of the video. My boss is very insecure and many of my good achievements have been brushed under the table. The atmosphere at work is tense and she complains about us almost constantly. I am heading for a review and if I can just get her to give more responsibility to the rest of us I think it will help. Time to try buttering her ego or I think a lot of us will walk. Many thanks
Thanks for clarifying this.. I know I’m good at my job and for a long time I do feel that I am a threat to my boss and my other code worker.. I was getting stressed by just feeling like it wasn’t ok for me ask questions that was already answered in past. But hearing you says this just encourages me to keep going. Knowing she’s feels threatened by me. It no longer makes me doubt myself. Because she was making me doubt myself. Which i feel deep inside i did nothing wrong by just questioning her on certain things i want to know more or again. Thank you
My boss was so mad I bought a brand new car he was also mad that I workout but that led to me getting fired throughout all of this I still remained humble blessing are coming.
Yes, I have experienced the same situation. I had a professional relationship with him for more than a decade, and I recently shared that I had purchased a new car. In the next few months, he started to show his real face and fired me. OMG, how silly people he is! 🙂
#1 definitely resonates. #3 definitely resonates. #4 for sure resonates. #5 #6 is 100% true for me. This boss has done everything in their power to sabotage me and has definitely tried to tarnish my reputation over and over, these bullies must be stopped enough is enough.📢💯 This boss just isn't a good person. Creating conflict and a toxic work environment is what they do best.
Validating false authority over yourself isn't how to deal with this type of issue. All you do is embolden the person to continue to take cheap shots at you, making them respect you even less than they did before. Regarding high-value individuals: I think that many of the examples given in the video (them not letting you communicate with upper management etc) are spot on. The level of pettiness that some of these middle managers will display is truly, truly astounding as a result of their own deep insecurities/envy. High-value, high-performance individuals don't need to play political games with management. Of all things one could do, you cannot respond in kind, because you'll only damage yourself, lowering yourself to their level, to their puerile behavior. Continued professionalism, continued results are the way to go. Sustained professional behavior forces the nasty employee(s) to play at your level, and this is precisely what you want, every single day when you step into the office. If upper management largely responds in the same manner as the lower level boss, it's likely systemic, and it's time to go.
I have a boss just like this I couldn’t figure out why he keeps not looking at my eyes. He will laterally look at everyone but me!!! It is very uncomfortable and rude. He never listens at all and then takes the ideas I tell him and pushes them back on me as his. I love the work that I do and my team but I cannot deal with this guy. Don’t even ask about my review. Hopefully this year turns around because I don’t know how much longer I can take him.
Ok so thanks for that, I needed it! Everything you said is exactly what I have dealt with up until yesterday. My boss did all those things and it came to an end yesterday when he pushed me onto the ground and slapped me across the face for saying I’m done with his shit! At least next time I will notice the signs before a get assaulted 🤷🏻♂️ thanks again ✌🏻
Yes he should be 100% and it wasn’t an employee it was the owner of the business. I am still thinking about pressing charges because this is the first time he has done it to me but the third time he has got physical with an employee. It’s just a hard call for me as I don’t like drama and live a simple routine life, however he deserves to be locked up and his business shut down! Thanks for the kind words
This happens to me all the time in the school system bc I always wanting things to b better. If u didn't go along to get along, then u were intentionally ignored. DEFINITELY TOXIC SCHOOL SYSTEMS OUT THERE. SEEMS like insecure bosses are the only ones that are lying their way to the top and causing so.much choas then ones who put them there try to cover bc it is a clear reflection of their failure as well. Alot of workplaces are just pure toxicity nowadays
I remember my old boss used to Trimble when I stood close to him. For example, he would show me something on his computer. When I leaned over to look closer at the screen, his body would start shaking. I always thought that was kind of odd.
Love your videos. I just got a new job and it looks like most te bosses are toxic. I just remember 2 bosses with effective leadership in my las 8 year of professional experience. I think I have to learn how to deal with team, I cannot be changing my job every time I find one of those.
It's very complicated not to run into an unprofessional management. Sometimes we just have to deal with them, as long as it's not your direct supervisor and as long as it doesn't cross all the red lines. Thanks a lot for your kind words, best of luck with this new role, hope things start working out for better very soon! Keep me posted!
@@Don.Mendoza You can deal with a manager which isn't exactly an example of professionalism, as long as there is a mutual respect. As long as these people don't enjoy making your life as difficult as possible. Now if your boss toxic, that's another story and it's going to be impossible to avoid collateral damage, so the best is indeed changing to another job.
I started a new web developer job last July and the coworker in the department was recently promoted as the assistant director at the time Well he thought it was a good idea to talk down to me, and have me do pretty much nothing for the first 3-4 months. I brought this up to his boss and she tried to mediate things but it still didn't work out because of his nit picking, micromanaging behaviors. Thankfully I am in a union and I can go back to my previous department but this has been such a demoralizing experience 😢😢😢
Toxic management is real, Corporate America need to open the eye and realize what is really going on in certain areas of work. They dnt want to have the conversation but its needed.
There was this company I worked for, that told me I was going to have to take a cut in pay, because of the company budget; Then about 3 weeks later, I resigned; Because I found a better paying job. Then the manager asked me; How much was the new job paying? Then when I told him; He said they couldn't match it. Then I said; Well, I'm just going where the money is. 😂✌
Thanks for sharing Marat, you hit a nail on the head again. If your boss is toxic even when you try to acknowledge their authority and affirm your intention to help the team and support them, you have no choice but go to another job, you boss is so happy to see you go voluntarily. If you need to apply for another job in the future, could you ask them to be your referee? Would you think after you leave and you ask for their favour, they would do it for you? I appreciate your advice. Many thanks Marat.
This happens to me constantly. Trade in one insecure boss for the next one. I have always tried so hard and they made my life hell for no reason. It happens time and again. I used to think trying harder would make it better. I have tried everything. Petty tyrants rule the world. Im done trying to make them hire or like me.
Thank you! This is very common for women with tech degrees, especially if they are high achieving. Per research decade after decade & very strongly supported by top mgmt. Unfortunately, they are just hostile.
@@Don.Mendoza As you've said previously, we just can't change jobs non-stop, things will never be ideal. As long as there is a balance, workplace boundaries set, we shall try out best to work out any differences.
Even though I drive a complex project doing a lot of stuff without much advice, I have a contentious relationship with my manager even though everyone else has only positive things to say about him. He says he doesn't like my attitude yet acknowledges others on our team are way worse in that department. I've come to realize he thinks I want to secretly be in management just because I have critical opinions about the way some things are done. I'll assuage his fears once I jump ship elsewhere.
I have noticed something in my temp job. The goal for the job is to prep 60 trays per hour, but is actually like 70, to stay ahead of the machine. After training, I was told I could do what I wanted to perfect my process, once I started getting my numbers in less than a week, I got talked to saying that while I see your getting your numbers this is not the trained way and is not right so you need to go back to the other way. But in truth it is slower and inefficient. Then this week, bc of that my numbers are less again, I feel like I am being told thru innuendos that I need to go faster. When it was the manager who told me to go slower. So it's very frustrating
At my current job, during the interview I was asked. "How do you deal with a Bad Boss?" I spoke without thinking "You leave. Why put up with it? Someone else will want me." I saw my then former Director and current manager just get quite. Been there if I may add. Stay off Linkedin. Never post your CURRENT job. A bad boss may use that to bad mouth you. You can send cease and disist letters from an attorney but they will continue. Until you are out of Linkedin. Make your professional website and only put up to the last job.
This is happening to me right now. I've been at my job for 6 years and I loved it here. My old boss retired and the new one is being like this. IDK y'all.
I experience all of this from my boss. I really loved the job and I sticked around only to have an admin hearing. I even underwent to counselling and don't know if I am going to resign until she convinces the mgt to have me terminated. I resigned rather than be placed to PIP. She was a black american. I was traumatized by the event. May God take care of her for me.
Unfortunately, this is the most bosses, most people that strive and a fairly low salary for years and years and years, until finally getting a good salary are the individuals who like that recognition and power, a.k.a. those on the spectrum of narcissism or psychopathy
Aww this is making crying it is exact what happened to me from my boss. With you advice I can confirm that I am doing the right thing, I appreciate you
Yes, it’s important to recognize when your boss is basically a toxic, threatened person, who is so, because they may simply come from a bad background. Other things I’ve picked up on, because it’s been so blatant, is having just about ALL work assigned to a new person, despite the boss being aware of the fact that I’ve been going through some family issues. Having me with, doing nothing all day, is not to “help” me, but to have a reason to sideline me. I also know that this sidelining has been going on, for longer than my issues. But that my boss will attempt to gaslight me into believing so. Of course, not agreeing with her gaslighting, would also become a threat. She has wanted me to become the jovial person I’ve been, despite the family issues and sidelining. But, because I’m aware of her larger agenda, which is to not have a high performer working for her anyway, I just tune my energies to outside learning and improvement, for a new position elsewhere, since I’ll likely be dismissed. She’s actually been trying to get someone in, for years and has finally found someone anyway.
I’m also having issues at work with middle management I’m sorry for everyone’s negative issues but so glad That I’m not alone how do such toxic people come into power my boss is the director of our unit he and his co~director both hate me I work them both on my bad days and never complain lately he has been calling the team in his office one by one blaming me for things that are going wrong and that are clearly not my fault in this last meeting I was calm non threatening and he threatened to call the police on me this guy is beginning to scare me.
man, I usually don't comment but the advice you gave about being friendly is not a good one. I agree with you that you have to be smarter about the situation but that doesn't mean bowing down and faking an attitude of being nice to this type of manager. I usually just quit or in some cases I cc my manager's boss in important emails related to work. What you suggest is like suggesting a kid to be nice to a bully. If you decide to leave, don't burn bridge with your manager's boss. you never know....The signs you described are pretty accurate imho. Thanks for the video
Yes I was agreeing with the video until the last part. There's no reasoning with a narcissistic, toxic boss. Been there, and it didn't end well. I much rather clean my floors with a toothbrush before I try reasoning with a jerk. No thanks.
