Surviving a Bear Attack (w/ Nickisnotgreen) | Sad Boyz Podcast 

This whole stream felt like Nick was just the little brother who refused to get out of Jarvis's room, pure sibling energy

I'm so tired right now, I didn't put together the joke about "Jordan and I are both green" and I just accepted at face value that there was, in fact, something intrinsically green about both Jarvis and Jordan. I mean like. As people. They do seem kind of green. You know, spiritually.

i feel like nick has been needing to vent about his fear of bears for awhile

one of the reasons i fully love this episode (and the pod in general) is the niche adhd thing where they asked nick about his week but somehow ended up discussing at length how to legitimately fight a bear instead lol

My constant wearing of oversized sweatshirts isn't just because I'm cold, they're also a precaution incase I ever encounter a bear as I can stuff it with leaves and quickly look ginormous

Its so cool how passionate nick is about bears... he is cutting off jokes just bc he needs them to know about bear attacks

I came back here just to hear Nick say "'cause you creampied me last night" and the guys losing it. Their reaction just makes it so much funnier. That and the stark contrast between Jarvis trying to think of how to distill the punchline of the joke and Nick's bluntness. Also, I'm really glad to see this podcast active again. I was just thinking about it a few days ago and how cool it is to see Jordan, Jarvis, and Nick in each other's videos lately, so it was nice to listen to them talk about fighting bears and piloting planes.

Did y’all hear about the guy who got lost in the woods but didn’t answer calls from search and rescue because he didn’t recognize the number? 💀

i love nick projecting his severe fear of bears on jarvis and jordan and both of them absolutely terrified

I drive just like Jarvis, I never honk unless its for a safety concern and when I first got honked at I cried and thought about what I did wrong.

fyi about the bear thing in case anyone ever finds themself head to head with a bear - it’s actually the brown bears that are aggressive! black bears are pretty laid back unless they have cubs with them. I grew up camping in the adirondacks where black bears are really common, and they actually have a decently serious problem with people feeding them because they’re so un intimidating that people will just share their food with them lol

I love that Jarvis clarified for us that it is, in fact, valid to get lost in the wildness. I wasn't sure if I was valid after drinking my own piss, fighting off a family of wolves, and changing my voicemail - but at least now I know (:

As a Canadian who lives in the woods; the rule on bears is two-fold. If the bear is far away and doesn't seem interested: slowly and calmly move away while keeping the animal in view. If the animal is close or showing intrest: stand up tall, raise your hands up and yell in a bellowing voice while trying to slowly move away without looking away, but in both cases; be sure not to look them directly in the eyes as they can see that as a challenge. Whatever you do though; never turn tail and run -- as lije a dog, they have a chase instinct.

this is the worst I’ve felt in a while. Thanks beautiful nick and lovely jarvis and perfect jordan for your pretty little smiles to distract my silly brain

i’m sending my therapist a clip of nick saying “i don’t want to be in the encounter and be like well why didn’t i figure it out when i had the time” because holy shit he described my brain perfectly

jarvis: "I have a list of things I wanna talk about" nick: "hey so I'm afraid of bears"

For a second I thought this podcast was just gonna be nick asking “here’s life threatening situations. What would you do?”

For the bear thing - as someone who works in emergency services and lives in bear county. You have your bears backwards Black bears are SUPER timid. They're SCARED of you. That's why you act big and make lots of noise, they'll usually run. Obviously, it's different if they have cubs or sometimes even when food is involved. If it's brown you lie down because grizzly bears are SUPER aggressive. They'll attack you if you are threatening. They will NOT attack you if you play dead. DON'T try and threaten a grizzly bear ESPECIALLY if they have cubs. Play dead and they'll leave. Polar bears, you're just dead man. They'll maul a dead person and are the biggest and strongest mfs. Also, you can smell a bear from pretty far away. They smell so bad.. They're also decently louder than you'd think, just keep your eyes around you. A bear will not die if you shoot it in the face. I know some bear hunters - they only hunt if a bear is being a general threat to the public, and they have to use specific guns and be very careful. You also need dogs if you're bear hunting, they help you stay alert. Bears will approach you for food if they've been given it before. DON'T give bears food, it threatens the life of others.. The main difference between grizzly bears and black bears. Black bears have dark and coarse fur, they're smaller and have brown lil muzzles. Grizzly bears are actually usually a pretty golden color - or so the ones I've seen in person. They're bigger and - from what I've seen, fluffier. They look like cute teddy bears. Best thing to do is watch out and have bear repellant.. Don't be dumb, bear repellant works like pepper spray. Some people have hurt themselves by using it like bug spray ☠️ Also, lock up your food away from your camps. Hang your food and food waste in trees. I was taught this in ground team training. Don't worry too much about bears. Moose are a lot scarier. They're way bigger, really strong and super aggressive. Moose could likely kill you from within your cars. There are also not a lot of ways to get out of a fight with those mfs. They're EVIL. Only tip I can give - from experience, is they'll huff and snort so you can sometimes hear them when you can't see them I think that's all I had to cover on this. I know this video is a year old, shut up.

Nick: "...when I was a junior in college..." This man is post-college age?! I thought for sure he was like 20!

i always forget how midwestern nick sounds until he talks to jordan

This bear conversation has me cracking up. Nick getting big and y'all reacting is hilarious. 😂😂 I agree Jordan, I'd definitely be a headline🤦🏽‍♀️

i know before nick went to sleep that night he thought about how much of a banger joke he dropped on the boys at 55:18

I’m no expert (I’m only so far along in the episode), but I think Nick has his bear facts mixed up. Black bears tend to be less aggressive and/or more tolerant of people, whereas “brown bears” (specifically grizzlies) are far more likely to be dangerous, even deadly. So yeah, the saying is “correct,” but Nick’s interpretation got a little confused along the way. You can potentially scare off a black bear with loud noises and such. But your only hope with a grizzly is to play dead and hope it doesn’t consider you a threat.

Listening to their driving stories and Jarvis' inspiration for new drivers the day I take my drivers test! Im gonna imagine you guys wished me luck

Hearing that Jarvis just got his license makes me feel better as someone also in their 20s without their license yet. I'm also nervous about getting it because I just learned that people with ADHD are more likely to get into car accidents. 😥

Seeing them talk about bears is hilarious to me because that is like our first activity at our camp. We get conservation officers in and they teach us safety and show prints and teach about what their poop looks like. Honestly I have seen many bears and the big ones you wouldn’t want to get close to but usually you don’t have a face to face encounter. Generally you see them across the way and go back where there are other people to set off the bear banger.

When I was living in Sweden, my boyfriend at the time told me it helps to warn the bears of your presence before you risk encountering any, so basically Swedes jangle car keys to prevent bear attacks when walking through the woods. You can also try singing. But idk, maybe that's just shy Swedish bears who attack only cos they're startled. The other tip I got is to always go hiking with someone who you know runs slower than you. :,)

i still come back to this episode of the podcast all the time because you guys talking about beard for so long is so funny

I love that Jarvis yawns in every video because I am constantly being called out for yawing at work being told I look tired. Just know I see you and I feel you and you are allowed to be a sleepy boy❤️

I love this type of podcast, where they kinda just talk about nothing and have no real topic. Very calming to listen to

Nick is so naturally funny; so happy he’s on the podcast!

I have had a licence for 11 years now and i still dont think i have ever honked my horn at someone. Its only meant to be used in a warning situation and im normally too busy trying to deal with the emergency like getting out of the way, checking mirrors etc. I dont honk out of anger at all. My mum does a lot and it's just not my automatic response. I am more of a swear under my breath sort of person.

I truly do believe that a "bear facts" segment w nickisnotgreen is pretty much needed at this point. Great video/episode as always y'all, had me ugly-laughing the whole time

Jordan and Jarvis buddy pilot movie when? (Nick can play the air traffic controller.)

"The bear returned fire" that was some Jarvis Johnson Gold

Jarvis, Jordan and Nick are the holy trinity of my youtube favs right now, what a hilarious episode

I love Nick's content so much, I'm so glad he's doing so many collabs with so many great content creators

Nick is not green, nick is here. Jordan is the special guest. Got it.

I genuinely laughed so hard throughout this omg

I used to live in northern Minnesota where bears and wolves are pretty common and from what I've seen, black bears are pretty skittish and wouldn't attack unless provoked or if it's a mother with her cubs

This pod is doing more than filling the void that the (redacted) and Eddy podcast left behind ngl tysm mwah mwah

When you *see* a bear, talk loudly and walk away slowly. If the bear charges you, what you do depends on what kind of bear it is. If it's a black bear, fight back. If it's a brown bear, play dead.

I love it when I'm being a safe driver and slowing down for curves and because there was a large pig just hanging out near the road and a car just passes me after we pass the slower part when I'm alrighty speeding back up, I'm just like ok ! Bye! Don't want you on my tail anyway. but I was also thinking "did you not see the giant pig?" lol (that was yesterday) Also one time when I was 16 and still only had my perment, I was driving perfectly normally with my parents in the car, and some lady speeds up behind me, is beeping a ton, passes me while flipping me off and yelling, and still flipping out while they're ahead of me, and she passed me just to turn off of the road shortly after (while looking back and cussing/beeping as she turned) I honestly still don't get it lol, but I can only guess she thought I was someone else or she was just having a really bad day, glad my parents were with me tho because if she tried to get me to pull over I'd be pretty scared

The grizzly bear was the true guest all along

the way this ended with the DMs convo turned this into Chad Boyz

I understand what Nick was saying, but the absolute "Swiper, no swiping!" energy he was giving in his bear encounter scenario was hilarious. 😂

Damn you guys gotta have nick on often, I love this dynamic

rlly enjoyed this i feel so much better after a rough week, thank you guys :)

Yeeesssssss I was hoping this would happen soon. Nothing like this podcast, please keep it rockjn'!!!

one year late but just in case nick encounters a bear the full saying is "if it's black, fight back, if it's brown, lay down, if it's white, say goodnight" for future reference also, if you shot a bear in the face, it wouldn't really do anything, they're highly bullet-resistent, the bullet would make it angrier

Missed this pod so much!

Someone needs to setup a fake bear attack that Nick believes is real because his explanation of what he would do is the cutest funniest shit I’ve ever heard

The faces you all were making in the thumbnail, I had to watch this one. Kudos to the person who made that

Imagine not finding a missing loved one bc you didn't think to listen to their voicemail all the way through.

that black box thing sounds like an snl skit

Nick feels like Jarvis' child

they all look so nice in this video!!

i’m so happy there’s another episode 😭

All three of my boys in one location I'm gonna sob

The thing with bears is you can just avoid them pretty easily just be cuz you see a bear doesn’t mean your going to be attacked by a bear in most cases you can just give them some distance and be respectful and you’ll be fine typically bears aren’t going to try and hunt you down

pov i just got home from school and i love this podcast so much anshsnjssns it makes my day every time

The term “Chinese Fire drill” was coined after a ship in command of a british and chinese crew ran a drill where they passed a bucket of water around the ship to put out a ‘fire’.

I love that y’all had Nick on to watch y’all for a while

This is my new favorite video on the internet

Missed you guys ❤️

23:52 The beginning of a great bit.

On the bit about how to tell the difference between black bears and brown bears: 1) geography - brown bears have a much smaller range and are typically only found up north (parts of Canada, the Pacific Northwest, and Alaska) while black bears are found in pretty much every state (at least those who haven’t actively rid themselves of black bears), a large portion of Canada, and even in a much smaller portion of northern Mexico. 2) distinctive features - brown bears have a shoulder hump, rounded & shorter ears, longer claws, and a “dished” face while black bears lack a shoulder hump and have larger and more pointed ears, shorter claws, and a straight face. Size and color can be deceiving so it’s best to use the following methods to identify which type you’re dealing with. Also, black bears tend to be timid so that’s why getting large and loud is one of the best defenses against them in an emergency situation (when simply getting away is not feasible). Brown bears are aggressive, so getting loud and making yourself look larger won’t do anything but initiate a fight that you won’t walk away from. Like Nick say, most people say that you should just play dead in a hostile encounter with a brown bear, but that strategy has become more controversial in recent years so idk for sure.

when i was a kid what i learned for telling bears apart was something about which part sticks up the most, "the hump or the rump". one has taller shoulders and one has a higher butt, i can't remember which one because i grew up in an area where mountain lions were a more pressing issue.

I missed this podcast so much

obsessed w this aesthetic. i want the "i love you" jarvis as my iphone background lmao

Ohhh, that DM. The description "a big swing and a big miss" is very apt.

I’m in love w all of you thank you for this

Nice to have y'all back 😌

At least five times a podcast I belly laugh, right out loud. And it’s mostly Jordan’s little asides.

I didn't get a notification for your last recent one so this was a nice surprise

ABOUT DAMN TIME

really enjoying the bear discussion

In general with any large or dangerous animal, I think the strat is usually to back away slowly and calmly, without turning away from them. Also, to prevent encounters and so that you don't catch them by surprise, whistling or humming while you walk to let them know you're there. Most animals don't actively hunt humans, but will attack if they feel threatened.

YAAAAYYYYY this is awesome! What a comeback, Jardan? Jorvis? Whatever your couple name is, adding Nick is fucking amazing!

i'm livin' in the future so the present is my past / *my presence is a present__* serving 2010s kanye so casually 👌🏼

As the movie cocaine bear has just come out this bear conversation has new meaning for me-

oh my god this episode had me laughing out loud

I've been feeling awful lately. So sad I can't get out of bed. And I'm a boy. I check off all the boxes here. Love this podcast btw, always helps to motivate me to be somewhat productive

Jordan saying The unsolicited vag pic being is kinda like a strike at the glass ceiling omg 😭

I like that Jordans idea of gorilla sign language is just Naruto ninja hand signs

I’ve seen multiple bears but always at distance. The only time I’ve actually encountered a bear up close was a yearling who kept coming back for food. Make a loud noise, the yearling will leave.

I'm not gonna lie, when nick made himself big, I flinched

This truck driving behind me was absolutely blinding me in all mirrors with its high beams for like many many blocks so I drove the actual speed limit for a bit, truck got mad jumped over to cut in front of me. As soon as he gets ahead of me I flipped on my high beams. Petty, yes. Divine, absolutely.

It has become a running joke that I always forget to use my horn.... XD Also my glasses look nearly identical to Jordan's. They look great on him!

these are my favorite guys

jarvis I'd totally listen to a spinoff podcast where you just give your opinions on seinfeld

Making my way through the sad boys catalog and y'all hit one of my hyperfixations so here's me clearing up all the bear stuff in a numbered list. 1.Grizzly bears are significantly larger than black bears. You can usually tell with ease. Black bears on the upper end of average for males are 300 lbs and 180 lbs for the females. Grizzly bears on the other hand are 300lbs on the low end for females and 600 lbs on the low end for males. Black bears are also pretty mild in temperament unless they're protecting their cubs. You can scare off a black bear most of the time there aren't THAT many cases of them killing or even attacking humans. Grizzly bears you're supposed to lay down and cover your head and back of your neck to the best of your ability and just try not to die. They're much more aggressive. 2. There are bear guns. So obviously most hunting rifles over .223 are going to be able to kill a bear with a headshot or shot to the vital organs. That being said if you're walking a trail a lot of people bring revolvers that are usually .357 magnum and above. A lot of people recommend at least a .44 magnum. Smith and Wesson currently sells a bear survival kit that has a short barrel .500 magnum. There are some people who will say the .40 S&W or 10mm auto out of a Glock is sufficient due to the higher ammo capacity and the ability to mag dump. There are even some cases of people fending off bears with 9mm though. All of this depends on you getting off accurate shots to vital areas before the bear closes the distance though 2A. I will genuinely say though Bear mace (if you store it correctly when not hiking and replace it by the date indicated) is infinitely more effective than a gun, and it doesn't needlessly kill an animal you're not going to eat or skin. Also if you miss with a firearm and don't hit the head or another vital area that bear is gonna keep going for you. On the other hand, most of the first hand accounts of using bear mace the bear is gonna run off as soon as it can't see. Also the bear mace is a constant stream so you can more easily see where you're hitting and adjust to hitting the face. 3. A grizzly would fuck up a gorilla EVERY TIME and it's for one simple reason: gorillas do not have claws. They're like a world's strongest man competitor on the meth but at the end of the day all they have are their fingernails. A grizzly has very sharp very long claws and can actually kill with them. This hyperfixation came from me doing a lot of camping in the Adirondacks and my boy scout troop leader giving us the "bear talk" when I was 13.

55:06 NICK ahahaha

Pro tip: if you're gonna shoot a bear, don't. Unless you're using a very very big and very very high-velocity bullet.

i would really love an episode with rhett and link!! and it would need to be called the biscuit boyz™ ep.

"bang bus but funny" was so underrated

my friends and i used to to chinese fire drills but it actually came in useful when i got sick behind the wheel. i switched w someone at the next light and they drove the rest of the way.

If the bear doesn't notice you, slowly and quietly walk away. If it approaches you, throw hands and use rocks/sticks/whatever weapons you can find

for my first time on a plane i literally would just keep seated n wait it out until there's barely anyone left inside the plane. i honestly can just leave way more smooth n quick. don't gotta be squished by a human wall tryna leave. cause some people be rude n will just push u outta nowhere ;-; or bump idk

oh, i definitely lean into my petty side when I drive. mostly only when I'm on the highway and someone tailgates me when I'm on the outer right side lane instead of just overtaking me. Especially when there are no other cars around, plenty of space for them to change lanes and get from behind me. I will purposely slow down, I will not let some random bully me into going faster when I'm going the speed limit. it's fucking annoying.