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T**** Confuses Hannity With Wild Mar-a-Lago Excuses | Breaking Squirrel News 

The Late Show with Stephen Colbert
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An appeals court obliterated the former president's defense in his classified documents case, and even Sean Hannity was confused when T**** rattled off conspiracy theories in an attempt to change the subject. Also, if you're working from home right now, it's a good idea to check your house for squirrels. #Colbert #Comedy #Monologue
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The Late Show with Stephen Colbert is the premier late night talk show on CBS, airing at 11:35pm EST, streaming online via Paramount+, and delivered to the International Space Station on a USB drive taped to a weather balloon. Every night, viewers can expect: Comedy, humor, funny moments, witty interviews, celebrities, famous people, movie stars, bits, humorous celebrities doing bits, funny celebs, big group photos of every star from Hollywood, even the reclusive ones, plus also jokes.

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5 май 2024

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Комментарии : 8 тыс.   
@Leonaza7
@Leonaza7 Год назад
If you're not embarrassed by the fact that this man was once the President of the United States, you haven't been listening
@victorarredondo304
@victorarredondo304 Год назад
Sleepy Joe is the epitemy of embarrasment in this country for his disatrous inflation & ruiining of country.
@95jpeat
@95jpeat Год назад
Nice try deep state. We know this is an npc
@nugboy420
@nugboy420 Год назад
@Leonaza7 deff have to have your back on this one.
@couragekarnga8735
@couragekarnga8735 Год назад
I'm more than embarrassed; I'm speechless!
@lindakautzman7388
@lindakautzman7388 Год назад
I'm horrified and grieve at the damage he has wrought.
@Aluhcav
@Aluhcav Год назад
"I declassified everything" Well we know that's a lie, he never declassified his taxes.
@goahead3995
@goahead3995 Год назад
But but but it's in permanent audit!🤣
@ideagirl
@ideagirl Год назад
Truth!
@lookissjaxin
@lookissjaxin Год назад
Or his school 🏫 grades 🤓; stable genius 😂
@alaric_
@alaric_ Год назад
Also the numerous lawsuits and paid off porn-stars might beg to differ...
@rosehill9537
@rosehill9537 Год назад
He declassified everything......OK so let's the ppl read the taxes records the school grades the evidence from the russia probe and all the NDA's
@bolabintu8709
@bolabintu8709 Год назад
Not just embarrassed, but super ashamed that he was once the president.
@kateskeys
@kateskeys Год назад
Watching this is sooooo much more effective than cognitive therapy. SOOOOO MUCH BETTER.
@CarlosMensuckass
@CarlosMensuckass Год назад
The person that came up with The Count of Mostly Crisco deserves every good thing in the world.
@abigails4088
@abigails4088 Год назад
100% agree.... left me dead, quite literally... was laughing and the distraction got me killed in my game XD
@zazaranger5
@zazaranger5 Год назад
Who ever did write that deserves a big raise
@pamevans8001
@pamevans8001 Год назад
that was greatness - damn near spewed my tea!!
@johnsmithe4656
@johnsmithe4656 Год назад
You shouldn't talk that way about Dear Leader, don't you know he's the Second Coming of Shitstain Crust? Next time you see a nasty one all dried out in your drawers because you only shower twice a month, SHOW SOME DAMN RESPECT!
@mk1st
@mk1st Год назад
The best😂
@scottmwilhelms2437
@scottmwilhelms2437 Год назад
So I guess the only secret documents left are his tax returns. 🙄
@kimweaver1252
@kimweaver1252 Год назад
Nope, the prosecution got those a year or so ago. I'm guessing they played into the charges and may result in indictments on federal charges.
@TheLemon333
@TheLemon333 Год назад
I think that they are just not allowed to be public yet.
@dingobat2389
@dingobat2389 Год назад
Good one!
@couragekarnga8735
@couragekarnga8735 Год назад
Biden should declassify them with his mind!
@thisbushnell2012
@thisbushnell2012 Год назад
Mazars delivered them up after extracting themselves from the orange turd's employ.
@terrancekayton007
@terrancekayton007 Год назад
When Life Gets You Down, Put on an old Stephen Colbert clip, to make you Smile. Great Writing, Great Graphics, Great Delivery, Great Team
@cesarregalado3420
@cesarregalado3420 Год назад
A real, real Airhead and REAL Embarrassment to the most powerful Nation on Earth. How did this happen? When I saw him for the first time and after I Heard him, my first thought was...Is this a JOKE? Is this for real? I will totally celebrate ALL the way when he's indicted and thrown in jail!!!!
@mammawlee
@mammawlee 2 месяца назад
I feel like l am in an alternate universe😔
@ChainReactionsProductions
@ChainReactionsProductions Год назад
Sometimes when I think he can’t be that stupid or brazenly criminal, he gets stupider and more brazen with his crimes
@couragekarnga8735
@couragekarnga8735 Год назад
I almost feel sorry for his lawyers.
@SRowntree
@SRowntree Год назад
@@couragekarnga8735 The smart ones bailed already. That's why his current ones were picked up from off the freeway.
@lindaleelaw5277
@lindaleelaw5277 Год назад
@@SRowntree from the off ramp at Compton ?
@atiredfloridian777
@atiredfloridian777 Год назад
IKR? You think he can't top himself and then he DOES.
@gamepapa1211
@gamepapa1211 Год назад
I think his loyal cult followers are even stupider and more brazen with their crimes. They took one look at this Orange Dumpster Fire of a garbage human being who constantly swindled them out of their money and actively tried to destroy his own country and STILL go, "Yep! That's my man for 2024!"
@auntiepha8343
@auntiepha8343 Год назад
Daily Reminder: When President Obama left office he went windsurfing. When Trump left office he went to court. VOTE
@kimweaver1252
@kimweaver1252 Год назад
Eight years of Obama, no indictments or convictions. ZERO. Four years of T-Rump? Lost count at a hundred.
@couragekarnga8735
@couragekarnga8735 Год назад
I will, I promise.
@pierreclifton1865
@pierreclifton1865 Год назад
pretty sure Trump went to play golf. But okay...
@danmcgriff1421
@danmcgriff1421 Год назад
Yes the almighty Obama Trump came in and cleaned up all of his messes turn this country around and Joe took over now look at it
@edmundooliver7584
@edmundooliver7584 Год назад
@@pierreclifton1865 and cheated.
@rebelbelle62
@rebelbelle62 6 месяцев назад
Mr Colbert, you made the last years of Donald Trump and covid bearable. Without your humor and ability to make us laugh we couldn't have made or continue to make it through. So,Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
@pamelaibarra790
@pamelaibarra790 Год назад
"Filet-o-fish smothered in ketchup" 😂😂😂😂
@phantomchef2217
@phantomchef2217 Год назад
The count of mostly crisco made me heave I was laughing so fucking hard. I wasn't ready! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@couragekarnga8735
@couragekarnga8735 Год назад
These names are getting more creative!
@e.abrahamovich8981
@e.abrahamovich8981 Год назад
Treason Cerebro and Orange mission impossible killed it.
@impunitythebagpuss
@impunitythebagpuss Год назад
Too funny!
@janmay7961
@janmay7961 Год назад
Me too, out of all names for the TFG, this is way up there most hilariously creative 😂
@shantoreywilkins651
@shantoreywilkins651 Год назад
🎃😂🤣🌝
@laskey2175
@laskey2175 Год назад
If Trump declassified "everything" then he declassified Hillary's emails. 🤣
@musicinggp
@musicinggp Год назад
I wish he would DECLASSIFY HIS PATHETIC EXISTENCE.
@ritabosico3328
@ritabosico3328 Год назад
Bazinga!
@latinaintexas2872
@latinaintexas2872 Год назад
Oh I like that one!🤣😂
@gamepapa1211
@gamepapa1211 Год назад
Ba-dum tish!
@billharris7235
@billharris7235 Год назад
Except it was proven she didn't have any classified info.
@pitchlockinc
@pitchlockinc Год назад
A flawless performance! Johnny Carson would concede the throne! Thank you to Colbert and his writers for this MASTERPIECE
@kidd_gallahad2512
@kidd_gallahad2512 Год назад
I know your type. The kind who if you hand them shot they think its perfume. Colbert is a wannabee, a disgusting left wing propagandist. Carson would piss on him.
@JohnWarner-lu8rq
@JohnWarner-lu8rq Год назад
What are you smoking?
@kidd_gallahad2512
@kidd_gallahad2512 Год назад
Colbert is a snot. You are a bot.
@bwenluck9812
@bwenluck9812 8 месяцев назад
​@@JohnWarner-lu8rq It's stood the test of time, John.... 😉
@JohnWarner-lu8rq
@JohnWarner-lu8rq 8 месяцев назад
@@bwenluck9812 Yeah.... BS has been around for quite some time.
@rubyhoward2085
@rubyhoward2085 Год назад
Someone please rescue that poor squirrel 🤣🤣🤣
@dozzer009
@dozzer009 Год назад
So now he thinks the FBI was looking for Hillary’s emails…at Mara Lago??? Seriously?
@fzghbkhvgfhhgv3524
@fzghbkhvgfhhgv3524 Год назад
Then trump Stole Hilary’s email or maybe he was the one stealing Hilary’s email 😂😂
@kenotube3160
@kenotube3160 Год назад
Yes, her emails were under the welcome mat.
@arcturionblade1077
@arcturionblade1077 Год назад
It's all projection, distraction and deflection at this point. A whole gish gallup streaming firehose of nonstop nonsense to confuse and whip up his braindead base with a kabuki theater performance of feigned perpetual victimhood. Donnie Deutschbag is desperate and has nothing left but lies to dish out.
@cc1k435
@cc1k435 Год назад
He seemed to be trying to sort out a new whopper to tell on the spot. 😆
@gloomyblackfur399
@gloomyblackfur399 Год назад
He said it for a simple reason--it's always worked for him in the past. Not just in the 2016 election, but remember the "Surrender Summit" with Putin? He doesn't understand why it worked for him then, he just knows it did. So why not try it now?
@Betweentwogames
@Betweentwogames Год назад
A man who makes anyone who works with him sign an NDA, probably has a vague idea of how illegal this is.
@theactualbajmahal833
@theactualbajmahal833 Год назад
Nah, that's just about his actual finger lengths.
@robertcampomizzi7988
@robertcampomizzi7988 Год назад
There are legitimate uses for NDA. His were less than admirable. I will NOT dispute that part.
@seanbrockest3888
@seanbrockest3888 Год назад
Always remember that an NDA is immediately invalid when any crime is involved.
@lancecarona2554
@lancecarona2554 Год назад
Trump is guilty AF !
@gamepapa1211
@gamepapa1211 Год назад
To be fair, NDAs are also used for things like movie or government contracts. But if the NDA is in a legal contract, yeah that's pretty shady.
@TGEnglishandcomputer
@TGEnglishandcomputer Год назад
This is the best one Steve 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I can't stop laughing 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@likethecheeze321
@likethecheeze321 Год назад
"Much Clothing! Many shirt. VERY PANT. Much Sock." XD Doge is Proud of Colbert, Memeing like a boss.
@o.b.7217
@o.b.7217 Год назад
*"When you're the president, they let you do it. You can do anything. Declassify documents by thought. You can do anything."*
@c.l.freeman7654
@c.l.freeman7654 Год назад
Sounds just like where we started years ago. "When you are a star? You can do anything. You can grab them by the pu**y and they just let you do it"
@KatKrueger
@KatKrueger Год назад
Yeah, including grabbing women by the…
@donaldbabbitt1214
@donaldbabbitt1214 Год назад
Well played!
@latinaintexas2872
@latinaintexas2872 Год назад
You know I can Wiggle my NOSE and become 50 Years Younger!!! I'm Sure he can't do that!🤣😂💃
@kingjamos2422
@kingjamos2422 Год назад
@@latinaintexas2872 Noice. When I scratch my ass, I get super strength. Super strength is awesome and all, but it doesn't mean much once you turn 70. I'm a long time away from that, however I also increase in age when I blink!
@chuckz253
@chuckz253 Год назад
The funny thing in all this, is that someone at Fox thought it was a good idea to air that. 🤣
@couragekarnga8735
@couragekarnga8735 Год назад
All for the base!
@csmith563
@csmith563 Год назад
@@couragekarnga8735 IKR🤣
@superluminalprobabilityclo6884
The base of red hats will parrot it forever
@MDRUSHCRUSH
@MDRUSHCRUSH Год назад
I fear the base will still see him as innocent. Their stupidity is frightening
@pawala7
@pawala7 Год назад
They know their audience will take whatever bullcrap he spits out as law and gospel.
@cpmrealty
@cpmrealty 6 месяцев назад
Stephen always knows how to deliver news.
@cindyharris3156
@cindyharris3156 Год назад
I am so thankful for people like Stephen Colbert.
@ERAforALL
@ERAforALL Год назад
“The banks should have known I was a liar.” So should every American who voted for him.
@dshepherd107
@dshepherd107 Год назад
It doesnt help when you lecture people. Leave it be. Some people grew up different, were desperate for change, & were conned. You’re just adding to the anger & divisiveness. The problems lay at the top, not the bottom where we are. FYI: No I didn’t vote for Trump. I was a Democrat my whole life, until they sold us out by supporting the wishes of the billionaires over us. We NEED to recognize we’re all Americans… human beings, & look for common ground.
@maryfields1382
@maryfields1382 Год назад
Oh, they know. They just won't admit they got fooled. Don the Con has made his living fooling people. So, you got fooled. That should piss you off enough to realize you need to pay more attention going forward. But instead, they double down. I'll never understand.
@raysun6617
@raysun6617 Год назад
They knew and still voted him in.
@steelers6titles
@steelers6titles Год назад
Stop me before I borrow again.
@dshepherd107
@dshepherd107 Год назад
@@raysun6617 They didn’t all know. Get around the country much? Have you asked them all? I’ve gotten around the country quite a bit. Sure, there’s a portion of his followers who are racists bigots. They’re not all though. I’ve grown up around overt racism. My point is, how do your words contribute to lessening the divide?
@LooseNut099
@LooseNut099 Год назад
Whoever came up with the “Count of Mostly Crisco is a genius.”
@danmcgriff1421
@danmcgriff1421 Год назад
Thank you my son came up with that you six
@vickywitton1008
@vickywitton1008 Год назад
What does it mean?
@marthareis5873
@marthareis5873 Год назад
@@vickywitton1008 It's a lard play on the famous story, "The Count of Monte Cristo."
@anderjpoo
@anderjpoo Год назад
@@marthareis5873 see what you did there ,........ clever!
@ZenFrequency111
@ZenFrequency111 Год назад
Man I hollered
@garyjoaquin
@garyjoaquin Год назад
What a brilliant monolog. Congratulations to everyone who contributed to it.
@santiagohaas7439
@santiagohaas7439 Год назад
- 'Congrats' to the Don !!!!!!!!!
@viralmemes9213
@viralmemes9213 Год назад
yeah i wonder if he will say the same for Biden considering he has classified documents in his garage and was never a president.
@communitygardener17
@communitygardener17 7 месяцев назад
​@@santiagohaas7439D John.
@liviusss
@liviusss Год назад
Stepdad who ran over the hamster... 🤣 Thanks for the laughs, Stephen, you really had a field day (and we did as well)!
@HairynosedWombat163
@HairynosedWombat163 Год назад
This judge Cannon now has huge egg on her face. How would anyone have any confidence in any of her rulings or judgements from today? She can thank the chump for destroying her short lived reputation and career though.
@pickledragonrebel
@pickledragonrebel Год назад
She did this to herself she knew exactly what she was doing.
@ProjectFlashlight612
@ProjectFlashlight612 Год назад
Het judgments are like the Star Wars novels - not Cannon.
@andyruse4670
@andyruse4670 Год назад
She’s in a for life position. Until and unless she’s impeached, there’s zero reason for her to feel regret for acting like his puppet.
@kenhoward3512
@kenhoward3512 Год назад
@@pickledragonrebel Trump appointed her to be a judge from a list provided by the far-right-wing Federalist Society. Yes, she knew what she was doing - and will likely continue doing it.
@co7314
@co7314 Год назад
She should be disbarred
@lw3269
@lw3269 Год назад
"I think they took my will....." Anyone else hoping he was going to finish that sentence with "to live"?
@couragekarnga8735
@couragekarnga8735 Год назад
Oh, great minds think alike!
@HairynosedWombat163
@HairynosedWombat163 Год назад
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@inlandempress4587
@inlandempress4587 Год назад
completely.
@jenniferstone2975
@jenniferstone2975 Год назад
😂😂😂 Yes!! 😂😂😂
@NcNephite
@NcNephite Год назад
😂
@lisab9541
@lisab9541 5 месяцев назад
This is one of the best monologues ever! ❤️👍🏻
@russkish8628
@russkish8628 Год назад
It's really a shame what he's done to the position
@stiimuli
@stiimuli Год назад
The former disgrace in chief does this every time he's in trouble. He throws out every excuse he can think of even if those excuses contradict each other. "They raided my home and took my documents...I didn't take any documents....those documents were planted by the FBI...those documents were never classified....I declassified them all magically when I took them....also those documents were clothes..."
@bobrisse9823
@bobrisse9823 Год назад
It's called DELAY! Trump tactic on display. Capitalism, the media, US justice, evangelicals, and MAGAS have fucked US and the world up. MAGAS, evangelicals, the media, US courts, and corporatism at this point truly do not understand REAL AMERICANS! We despise your MAGA, fake Christian, and media asses; your republican reps are on the wrong side. Republicans (liars, cheaters, and thieves) are dinosaurs; let them rot in their own infernal bigotry. US will be there for ALL of US no matter what shenanigans any MAGA, US court, evangelical meat head, or media talking head spouts. TRUMP was not your savior; he brought out all the hatred, bigotry, and greed republicans have to offer US and MAGAS, evangelical meat heads, or media talking heads failed to deliver anything but hate, bigotry, and greed! The progeny of US are already facing a world of grief. I encourage US to remember that republicans have not voted for any legislation that would protect US, our progeny, or the world. Do not vote “R”. US and “Homie” don't play that game!
@benwu7980
@benwu7980 Год назад
Colbert's analogy to scattershot and fridge magnets is quite apt, or Neil deGrasse Tyson's quote "It becomes truth, simply because it got repeated so many times." Another thing he said to Hannity was that after magacally declassifying document, that he sent them *everywhere* I almost feel sorry for his lawyers for their jeopardy. It's rather amusing that in court, his lawyers are quite surprised at being asked the most obvious questions. Reminds me of a sketch Key & Peele did, called "Rap Album Confessions"
@CopingwithGrattitude
@CopingwithGrattitude Год назад
Word salad…common trait of the personality disorder.
@YM-zz5qq
@YM-zz5qq Год назад
“Such sock”😂
@kellir.747
@kellir.747 Год назад
Spot on!
@toraneko_maru
@toraneko_maru Год назад
Stephen's monologue was on fire! He roasted every single one of those excuses to perfection.
@7027flowers
@7027flowers Год назад
💯🤣
@ludwinghurtado5032
@ludwinghurtado5032 Год назад
Yes he did! This is viral content! Well all his material is viral really but this deserves virality!
@smac9273
@smac9273 Год назад
It’s too bad his best monologues are the ones making fun of Trump.
@smac9273
@smac9273 Год назад
@@Nate-.- what? Just saying it would be nice if Trump just went away and we rarely heard about him again in the monologues.
@Surge1077
@Surge1077 Год назад
The comparison of Judge Cannon to the girl from the Ring movies KILLED ME!
@LavonYoung1
@LavonYoung1 Год назад
It's about time real legal minds got it right.
@elchappy2809
@elchappy2809 Год назад
Thank you Steven and Staff for the laughs early in the morning! Love ya!
@dano8902
@dano8902 Год назад
Just...incredible. Every time you think he can't sink any lower he breaks out the jackhammer and screams "I NEED A NEW SUB-BASEMENT!"
@kimweaver1252
@kimweaver1252 Год назад
Hands the jackhammer to a contractor, whom he never pays.
@couragekarnga8735
@couragekarnga8735 Год назад
And then refuses to pay the contractors!
@danmcgriff1421
@danmcgriff1421 Год назад
Joe's old you know they can't leave him alone you shouldn't make fun of old people someday we'll all be there hopefully
@johnhipp8267
@johnhipp8267 Год назад
@@danmcgriff1421 What are you even rambling about?
@derekstein6193
@derekstein6193 Год назад
@@johnhipp8267 I think he is trying to treat the OP as if he/she was referring to Biden instead of Agent Orange. Just another deflection and a failed attempt at a "gotcha" quip. A troll or self-deluded fool, either way Dan Mcgriff is best ignored.
@joshthompiano
@joshthompiano Год назад
"There is nothing either classified nor declassified but thinking makes it so." ~Donald Shakespeare
@id10t98
@id10t98 Год назад
Be classified or not be classified, that is the question!
@commentz-1
@commentz-1 Год назад
🤣😂🤣😂
@justsaying14
@justsaying14 Год назад
A document, declassified would read as sweet.
@pennydavis9494
@pennydavis9494 Год назад
Love the nickname
@mlucia534
@mlucia534 Год назад
I love you!!!! :) You deserve an award for this episode. OMG! Someone arrest him already!
@slyeung6562
@slyeung6562 Год назад
Amazing show ! Thank you Mr.Stephen Colbert
@w.s.soapcompany94
@w.s.soapcompany94 Год назад
It's like watching a five year old make up the rules to a game as he is playing it.
@user-kb9cu4rl9z
@user-kb9cu4rl9z Год назад
tRump's been doing that his whole life. Doh. 🤪
@Michelles222
@Michelles222 Год назад
That's how he thinks every minute. He just pops off what his pea brain is "thinking" at that moment. The drugs aren't helping.
@kassiapencek6185
@kassiapencek6185 Год назад
Exactly
@bobrisse9823
@bobrisse9823 Год назад
Calvinball!
@sophierobinson2738
@sophierobinson2738 Год назад
@@bobrisse9823 You beat me to it! 😂
@aj42k
@aj42k Год назад
That Trump photo with that outfit made me hit the floor dead with laughter.
@kenotube3160
@kenotube3160 Год назад
Don’t worry. That cable is rated to hold 50 tons.
@karenconroy1860
@karenconroy1860 Год назад
Need to bleach my eyes
@Echo81Rumple83
@Echo81Rumple83 Год назад
Someone's using their photomanip skills into good use 😆
@indigowolf556
@indigowolf556 Год назад
Baby got back indeed 😂
@rainbowprism6242
@rainbowprism6242 Год назад
The guy should have looked like a blimp. They photoshopped him too generously
@TheMarkyMarx
@TheMarkyMarx Год назад
Thank you Stephen. Comic gold. Could we have possibly had a dumber president. I mean really? I doubt it.
@starsalign9336
@starsalign9336 11 месяцев назад
And more criminal president? I doubt that, too.
@jeremycurtis2334
@jeremycurtis2334 10 месяцев назад
I don’t know. If anything TFG has taught me is my imagination does not go far enough. Just when I think it’s reached the edge he proves me wrong. I’ve read (a few times) and studied the Inferno and Paradise Lost at a collegiate level. Didn’t really fathom how far down that really went. But that means we could have dumber and more criminal possibilities. He might be the worst now, but what I thought was the worst before him, he proved me wrong. Until now, none more dumb or criminal. However, can it go worse? Didn’t think so before, but now maybe possibly….
@johntoddtompkins3898
@johntoddtompkins3898 8 месяцев назад
Let's all pray it doesn't get worse that Trump. @@jeremycurtis2334
@mbf6160
@mbf6160 Год назад
The fact he had that bat waiting as if he had a run in with the squirrel before made it even funnier 🐿️ 😂
@michelleb7399
@michelleb7399 Год назад
I love how they are still sharing creative names generated by Twitter users. All these names later and they still get a lot of laughs.
@jeffbaer5851
@jeffbaer5851 Год назад
When the nightmare is over, there needs to be a GIGANTIC mural with every name used, in order. The tourism would make whatever town it's in into a new Vegas.
@conwaymj88
@conwaymj88 Год назад
I like using them too. anything to keep that dirty fkers' name out of my mouth
@mlr4524
@mlr4524 Год назад
I think you can still suggest names on Twitter using the hashtag #HeWhoShallBeNamed and #Colbert etc. I've already forgotten what mine were as it was so long ago lol.
@gamepapa1211
@gamepapa1211 Год назад
I wanted to submit "Eric's Dad" but someone beat me to it. Ah well.
@kathyastrom1315
@kathyastrom1315 Год назад
The Count of Mostly Crisco is really one of the best ones yet!
@gamepapa1211
@gamepapa1211 Год назад
Bonus points: every single one of Mar-a-Lardo's inner circle, including his son, his in-laws, and his other son he forgot existed, all rose up to defend him on the usual spots. They all must be kicking themselves when they saw him go on Fox to practically admit that he's a liar.
@jefschobert9765
@jefschobert9765 Год назад
MINDFREAK!! He thought he’d still be president after the election while he was president so he still is president because he thinks he is.
@kittimcconnell2633
@kittimcconnell2633 Год назад
They've never seemed to regret all the other times he's blustered out an admission of guilt
@calvinbright3054
@calvinbright3054 Год назад
All the in-laws are watching their future alimony go up in flames. How depressing it must be to find out the lying pigs you've been sleeping with for their money are about to be bankrupt. Yes ladies, you sold yourselves for nothing. They're all going to end up destitute, unemployed and unemployable. 🤣 🤣
@Chompchompyerded
@Chompchompyerded Год назад
This seems like one of those times where the inlaws are also outlaws.
@kathytourtillott9361
@kathytourtillott9361 Год назад
One can only hope they are . . And that will lead to rethinking all their life choices
@airheadrica1
@airheadrica1 Год назад
By far the Best, and Super Funny monologue Ever. ❤
@I_Get_Computers_Puting
@I_Get_Computers_Puting Год назад
You don't have to be partisan to cringe at how he acts. He's like 77 years old, my 17 year old daughter acts more mature than this dude. And to think, that there's actually people that defend him, still.
@atiredfloridian777
@atiredfloridian777 Год назад
If for some reason you're not embarassed that this man was once the leader of the most powerful nation in the world, then you can't call yourself American. You can just call yourself as much of an embarassment to us as Eric's Dad.
@c0mpu73rguy
@c0mpu73rguy Год назад
He was president of China?
@KatKrueger
@KatKrueger Год назад
@@joeiborowski9763 Just think, in eight years you’ll be old enough to vote.
@adrasteia3866
@adrasteia3866 Год назад
I'm not as embarrassed as the people who voted for him should be.
@adrasteia3866
@adrasteia3866 Год назад
@@joeiborowski9763 Drumpf just told Hannity that maybe the FBI were looking for Hillary Clinton's emails at Mar-a-lago and you're calling Biden senile? Really? You need to go look in the mirror, son.
@popcorn8743
@popcorn8743 Год назад
You won't say trump s name methinks YOU should be embarrassed remember the orange man can't hurt you lol
@serendipitouslytranscenden8843
Donny thinks president means magician. If that were so I'm sure Biden would have made him completely disappear right away.
@jeanneratterman
@jeanneratterman Год назад
Yeppers!
@theHaru20
@theHaru20 Год назад
I honestly think he thinks he is some kind of god.. or at least that the presidency equals god like status 🙄
@serendipitouslytranscenden8843
@@theHaru20 I couldn't agree with you more. Crazy orange boy has a god complex fer sure. It's a narcissist thing.
@marshwetland3808
@marshwetland3808 Год назад
He seems to think it's like being the prez of his company - little hitler bully-dad boss asshole.
@alrightyru
@alrightyru Год назад
I'd rather do the old cut him in two and then wheel away the top half and drop it off the pier ..
@iamjro
@iamjro Год назад
Omg the squirrel 🐿 😂😂😂 This was a great monologue!
@Lena-vl4iv
@Lena-vl4iv Год назад
This was brilliant. I laughed my ass off. 🤣🤣🤣🤣
@akaiclone02
@akaiclone02 Год назад
That one made me bust out laughing. "The Count of mostly Crisco" best nickname yet
@ttacking_you
@ttacking_you Год назад
I kinda liked _the flabrador deceiver_
@akaiclone02
@akaiclone02 Год назад
@@ttacking_you tangerine dream was good to
@ttacking_you
@ttacking_you Год назад
@@akaiclone02 then, of course, there's the P.O.S.otus (Kimmel)
@lynnegackstetter2779
@lynnegackstetter2779 Год назад
Count of Mostly Crisco. Who ever came up with that one deserves a raise. You are in your monologue and I am still giggling about this one. Time to rewind
@o.b.7217
@o.b.7217 Год назад
It's from Twitter. Not from the staff.
@lcritter
@lcritter Год назад
Earlier tonight I heard Michael cohen call it Mara-lardo. So mostly Crisco had me roaring .
@sjs9698
@sjs9698 Год назад
@@o.b.7217 well find out who their employer is & call them. they deserve a raise ^^
@Sig2423
@Sig2423 Год назад
I have a new favourite 🤣🤣🤣
@ideagirl
@ideagirl Год назад
Give him a double raise!
@edmonddantes5750
@edmonddantes5750 Год назад
I almost peed from laughing at the screaming squirrel guy.
@ansfridaeyowulfsdottir8095
@ansfridaeyowulfsdottir8095 Год назад
He confused Hannity, when Hannity already comes pre-confused! 🤣🤣🤣 {:o:O:}
@CJA32able
@CJA32able Год назад
Your phrases about the “much clothing “ had me crying😂
@customer5032
@customer5032 Год назад
"such socks." 🤣
@AngelaKSellsHomes
@AngelaKSellsHomes Год назад
They act like biden is incoherent. 🤣 Of course he does have that...a big brain. 🧠
@kingalfred2014
@kingalfred2014 Год назад
@@customer5032 Wow
@heatherface1
@heatherface1 Год назад
"The former president then used his "mind" to make dumb words come out of his stupid mouth." 😆🤣😂
@rockshowness9446
@rockshowness9446 Год назад
Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee... 🤓👋 🤣
@davidwright8432
@davidwright8432 Год назад
Stephen was being polite, as ever. It wasn't has mouth.
@caseyrayharris.esquire489
@caseyrayharris.esquire489 Год назад
Yeah he did classify everything except the JFK documents that were due to be Declassified of. With no logical explanation either
@matthewconrad2908
@matthewconrad2908 Год назад
He also use this "mind" to declassify by "just thinking" ...His mother must have tried to repeatedly restrain his so called "mind" for the good and betterment of mankind and it's own officialdom having been obscured by this foggy fellow and his beloved "mind over matter" jousts with curious onlookers who find him fascinating to bear such a resemblance to apes who have regained their rhythm as workers he molests with his remarkable large orange cranium and puts them"on the spot" for having dealt it out like one of his $5.00 prime rib dinners to further than evaluate the war between various humans who are far more worried that apes are more intelligent than they might appear ...
@ukiitm
@ukiitm Год назад
@@davidwright8432 What? Guess you got something caught in your mouth.
@SchlumiBenLuschi
@SchlumiBenLuschi Год назад
This is absolute gold. I keep coming back for more laughs. Thanks be to Quob for giving us the Dontard.
@llfsmith1
@llfsmith1 Год назад
I watched this a few times, laughed hard on each watch.... Stephen is beyond hilarious 😂
@theoneandonlygrod
@theoneandonlygrod Год назад
"Okay, Mr. President. So you're saying you saw the documents, magically de-classified them ... and THEN you stole them?"
@geekishgir
@geekishgir Год назад
The Count of mostly Crisco had me laughing far more than it should have. Probably one of the best you've picked!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@commonsense571
@commonsense571 Год назад
OKR?!! 😂😂
@CelesteRAdams
@CelesteRAdams Год назад
I have watched this over 10 times & it seems new each time & I scream laughing each time!
@janetbooth9268
@janetbooth9268 Год назад
Stephen, you and your team keep getting better and better. Thank you for the laughs. I also caught that Rodney Dangerfield shoulder shrug, it made me think how he would throw all this bs into his acts. Keep them coming?
@richardosbourne3346
@richardosbourne3346 Год назад
Everyone seems to have missed it, he also admitted that there are documents in his other properties. That needs attention right now!
@vetgirl71
@vetgirl71 Год назад
Your absolutely right! 🎯 #45 actually admitted on national tv that he took those classified documents from the WH! 👏🏾👏🏾 This man is a habitual liar and maniac! 🙄🤷🏾‍♀️
@j.s.669
@j.s.669 Год назад
Good to know!
@selalewow
@selalewow Год назад
Mayhaps buried near the first hole ay Bedminster?
@YM-zz5qq
@YM-zz5qq Год назад
There’s even a video of him moving boxes onto a plane to take them to his other property. 😱 imagine that!
@blackbird5634
@blackbird5634 Год назад
Joy Reid did a show on that line last night.
@martiansoon9092
@martiansoon9092 Год назад
It is good to see that some judges wants to keep their law licenses...
@jeremybenoit759
@jeremybenoit759 Год назад
Ya and so they do what the democrats tell them
@skiks1853
@skiks1853 Год назад
@@jeremybenoit759 Trump could try not lying and committing crimes. He'd be better off.
@Rorys-Mancave
@Rorys-Mancave Год назад
@@jeremybenoit759 you hate the law dont ya
@ThePoppinger
@ThePoppinger Год назад
@@jeremybenoit759 Yeah they should do what the criminal wants them to do!
@SHARKAST1C
@SHARKAST1C Год назад
@@jeremybenoit759 supporting treason isn't a good look, but go off.
@weirdunclebob
@weirdunclebob Год назад
"Martha My Dear" at the end was awesome. Cheers TLSB 😁👍
@sergiussouth4754
@sergiussouth4754 7 месяцев назад
Awesome monologue. I'm so glad Stephen is back. (The writers must have been writing jokes on their off time.) It was great. My dad had an outdoor squirrel that he shared his peanuts with. It would run up his arm to get the nut. It was cute. My Godfather had a squirrel for many years. Simon was a great pet, until he got very old, and became violent. Squirrels are fast. They can run up one side of you, bitting the whole way, and run down your other side, bitting everywhere, before you have time to react. If this guy has squirrels that have become habitual "guests", he is acting appropriately. Squirrels can become vicious, and we don't move fast enough to be able to protect ourselves from them. Poor guy. It's embarrassing, but I've done the very same thing, complete with baseball bat, jumping on a desk, and screaming...all of it. I get it. Been there. Done that. It's real, folks. Be thankful it isn't you. (squirrels are not good pets. They are unpredictable.) It sure makes great late night, though. Thanks Stephen.
@care2think611
@care2think611 Год назад
"Declassified them.....with his Mind !!!" That one really got me. Sometimes the writing and Colbert's delivery gets me almost hollering on the floor. Thank You! These gems and everthing y'all do keep me closer to sanity. Don't stop!
@adriennegormley9358
@adriennegormley9358 Год назад
I'm still on board with the people who insist that Biden can reclassify them the same way.
@KGershkoff
@KGershkoff Год назад
There's a Professor Charles Xavier joke in there somewhere.
@tma2001
@tma2001 Год назад
for such a classy guy he sure does de-classify everything he touches!
@WhiteFangofWar
@WhiteFangofWar Год назад
@@tma2001 Yes everything that comes into contact with him inevitably loses its' class.
@fortunateson7852
@fortunateson7852 Год назад
Yeah when he says that, what does Hannity think? I mean seriously, he HAS to think that’s crazy. I mean how do you hear those things and not doubt his sanity? I know he criticises Biden but my God what a mess. To be fair this is exactly why we need some younger men in these positions. I mean even men in their fifties are thirty years younger.
@gamepapa1211
@gamepapa1211 Год назад
So King Baby Coward's excuse is "I am a Jedi"? Oh yeah, that will fly in federal court.
@couragekarnga8735
@couragekarnga8735 Год назад
It would have if Barr were AG.
@gamepapa1211
@gamepapa1211 Год назад
@@couragekarnga8735 sadly that's the truth.
@chrisleebowers
@chrisleebowers Год назад
He pleads the Sith
@gamepapa1211
@gamepapa1211 Год назад
@@chrisleebowers why can't I upvote a comment more than once!? Laughed my ass off to that one! Thank you!
@jeffbaer5851
@jeffbaer5851 Год назад
DIdn't you know? T***p appointed all the best people to the federal bench! "The trekkies, we love the trekkies and their force. It's the biggest, hardest force ever in terms of forcing. As the Wolverine said to Superman, 'May the force live prosperously and long live trek.' I'm ... did you know this, I was the first person to think of the wars in the stars, those stars having wars? It was all me, and yet the socialist woke people want to keep me out of Valhalla like any good Jet-Guy...Jenga... Jello... Jet-Puffed.... man, woman, person, camera, TV."
@elizabethmoini2902
@elizabethmoini2902 Год назад
"Stephen.... Much Love from the UK!!.....I LOVE your sense of humour!!. I thought our politics here in Britain was nuts!!!. Thanks for making me Laugh so much, i nearly wet myself!!!".
@phyllisgarrison3561
@phyllisgarrison3561 Год назад
I wonder what Trump has on Hannity. Nobody at Fox News wants to talk to him, so he calls up Hannity for an interview. Hannity looked so uncomfortable, and he tries to guide Trump into what to say.
@stoppin2look
@stoppin2look Год назад
"45" was "thinking about" declassifying each document as he was holding them out to be photographed by foreign buyers?
@danburnes722
@danburnes722 Год назад
Or extorting Macron
@shermanculbertson6244
@shermanculbertson6244 Год назад
Stephen and this crew always knock the monologue out of the park.
@aryamehr2182
@aryamehr2182 Год назад
Jon Stewart is still the GOAT
@pierreclifton1865
@pierreclifton1865 Год назад
bot
@AngelaKSellsHomes
@AngelaKSellsHomes Год назад
Yes they do...thankfully! I have to get my politics from comedy or I would probably cry. lol
@julieroberts9255
@julieroberts9255 Год назад
TONIGHT WAS THE BEST OF ALL TIME!!
@doodooheadpleighboy4255
@doodooheadpleighboy4255 Год назад
Someone knocked his ear out of the park. 😂😂😂
@suzivigeant2213
@suzivigeant2213 Год назад
Being able to replicate that man's screaming was icing on a cake.
@kidd_gallahad2512
@kidd_gallahad2512 Год назад
WTF?
@sideshowbob
@sideshowbob Год назад
Sooooo . . . Hillary's emails were in boxes of PRINTED OUT paper? Sounds like the punchline of a Dilbert cartoon about the pointy haired boss "I didn't read your email because my secretary is out so there's no one to print my emails for me"
@alariel85
@alariel85 Год назад
The dude has a bat ready and was skittish at every small noise, I believe him when he said he was terrorised by squirrels beforehand.
@justsaying14
@justsaying14 Год назад
You know who has been taken out of action by squirrels?! Thanos 😱
@vincentavangogh3636
@vincentavangogh3636 Год назад
Has he tried eating them? Their meat is delicious in stews. Both squirrels and rabbits are scarce in my backyard now... ☹️
@melissaweyrick5311
@melissaweyrick5311 Год назад
The Squirrel's are in 45's head, and they have rabies.
@couragekarnga8735
@couragekarnga8735 Год назад
Which really sucks, 'cause I'm sure he's got cyphylus.
@kimweaver1252
@kimweaver1252 Год назад
It's the other way around, the squirrels are terrified and T-Rump has rabies.
@herminaescamilla8537
@herminaescamilla8537 Год назад
N tRump is the one who gave those poor squirrels Rabies too..
@nadiarepich5199
@nadiarepich5199 Год назад
Way too funny! Brilliance at its best. I can do everything (declassify) with just my mind: My Unfavorite Martian👽This is one of the best monologues I have ever seen. Talent way beyond AGT. Stephen is on a roll here. No one can outdo this most brilliant performance. 🎊🏆
@CollinsCorp
@CollinsCorp Год назад
THANK YOU for alternate names! I never want to hear T’s name again and Count of mostly Crisco is SO on the nose; I didn’t think anything could beat Velveeta Voldemort but this comes super close, might be a tie
@PhillyFrank1
@PhillyFrank1 Год назад
Special kudos to whomever came up with "the Count of Mostly Crisco" -- definitely deserved that protracted laugh from the audience.
@petercolbert7953
@petercolbert7953 Год назад
Hello sir I really appreciate your love and support over my dad career
@stephengordon2995
@stephengordon2995 Год назад
@@petercolbert7953 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣foh
@jameslevenson8605
@jameslevenson8605 Год назад
Best one I've heard since "A-golf Twit-ler"
@julieroberts9255
@julieroberts9255 Год назад
THIS WAS ONE OF COLBERT'S BEST NIGHTS!! I LOVED IT!!
@juanm.buentello4816
@juanm.buentello4816 Год назад
I agree with you 💯%🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@christopherbedford9897
@christopherbedford9897 Год назад
I was just thinking this monologue contrasts strongly with so many others that are funny, sure, but not laugh-out-loud funny like you hear studio audiences do which always strikes me as super fake laughter. This was genuine belly-laugh stuff.
@williambarger8043
@williambarger8043 Год назад
Remember, putin's c-ck holster.
@jeangillespie1173
@jeangillespie1173 Год назад
Absolutely...
@mr.halloween87
@mr.halloween87 Год назад
We are going to be absolutely disappointed by the final outcome.
@richardk6196
@richardk6196 Год назад
A couple of days late to the party, but damn did he kill this monologue.
@FutureCommentary1
@FutureCommentary1 Год назад
5:48 He must have confused the presidency with an absolute monarchy. And even then people can't act on the monarch's thoughts.
@blascantu7221
@blascantu7221 Год назад
"I declassified it with my mind" ~ The Tangerine Wizard of Mar-o-Lago
@adamjukes6064
@adamjukes6064 Год назад
steve; your best yet - in my many years of being a fan.
@susanwelch9087
@susanwelch9087 Год назад
The Count of Mostly Crisco....down in Mar a Lardo
@robingrogan7937
@robingrogan7937 Год назад
Absolute classic! I have waited till 05:15 here in the UK to hear you rip hell out of the king of morons!! How can someone like trumpet snr be leader of a political party? Thanks Stephen for my morning dose of hysterics!!
@chicop8514
@chicop8514 Год назад
That’s a good thing now we really know who the dumbAss ppl are lol
@catmomjewett
@catmomjewett Год назад
The boy is a national treasure!
@pm6693
@pm6693 Год назад
Yep, me, too. Stephen and Seth Meyers set me up for the day...😊..!
@joannbeiser4907
@joannbeiser4907 Год назад
Yet there are people that believe he was the winner of the election and will fight again if he runs and loses! Scary, very scary!
@amyelizabeth529
@amyelizabeth529 Год назад
Good Morning, UK 🇬🇧 😊!
@SRowntree
@SRowntree Год назад
Thank you for everything, Stephen. And to the unspoken heroes of your crew too!
@victorarredondo304
@victorarredondo304 Год назад
the crew that insisted in the capitol on jan 6???
@SRowntree
@SRowntree Год назад
@@victorarredondo304 Trumpanzees are camping out on Late Show videos waiting to screech
@couragekarnga8735
@couragekarnga8735 Год назад
I anticipated this, and was not disappointed! Love ya, SC!
@joshuawilson5434
@joshuawilson5434 Год назад
@@victorarredondo304 dude, spell check.
@tomnalley3644
@tomnalley3644 Год назад
Colbert is a commiecrat just like the rest of the Hollywood trash.
@ronsflightsimlab9512
@ronsflightsimlab9512 Год назад
My boss is from the UK... He said "If you or I would have done this, we would be drinking water upside-down for a living."
@geopolitix7770
@geopolitix7770 Год назад
I'm torn between: "Mmmmmm are THESE your Nuclear codes??" And "A treason Cabrebro" as my favourite lines!
@janpowell1549
@janpowell1549 Год назад
"The Count of Mostly Crisco", I believe that's one of my favorites so far. Stephen Colbert has helped me through these extremely trying times. His wit, charm, compassion and empathy are only a handful of what makes him such a decent and moral man. Not to mention I can't stop laughing every time I watch him. Big love for him.🤣😘❤
@MrHootiedean
@MrHootiedean Год назад
This monologue is the reason The Late Show should have ALL the Emmys! "The Count of Mostly Crisco", "conservative judge and girl from The Ring who went to law school ", 6:51 , "such sox"! 😂😂😂
@LostintheTwilightZone
@LostintheTwilightZone Год назад
Single....such sock!!!
@jennm113
@jennm113 Год назад
I agree fully!!
@petercolbert7953
@petercolbert7953 Год назад
Hello Sir I really appreciate your love and support over my dad career
@VP_A-Team
@VP_A-Team Год назад
Pennsylvania home work zoom call guy is in serious need of Patch Adams!! I had a flashback to Robin Williams and Michael Jeter in 'Patch Adams' when they were in the 'Institute' at the beginning of the movie. Aaaaah!! Lob in the 'Holy (Squirrel) Hand Grenade'!!! Take cover behind the bed!!!
@benlarsen4602
@benlarsen4602 Год назад
Yeah, that quote just makes him crazy.
@miket4560
@miket4560 Год назад
I love the fact you won't even write the weird orange guys name. ❤
@talk3194
@talk3194 Год назад
Orange Jesus, is his name, and the GOP are to blame, because they all went insane, committing crime for power and fame.
@thisbushnell2012
@thisbushnell2012 Год назад
its a family alias. the Drumpfs have been grifting since before arriving on these shores.
@danmcgriff1421
@danmcgriff1421 Год назад
That's how far up into your head he is you can't even talk normally you can't even bring yourself to mention his name I'm assuming you're a grown man Mike act like it
@alrightyru
@alrightyru Год назад
@@danmcgriff1421 why? It's much more fun this way!
@freema9246
@freema9246 Год назад
I'm OK if he is here and forever more named crisco🥴
@ssfheather6629
@ssfheather6629 Год назад
Omfg the count of mostly crisco…A++++++ that was chefs kiss perfect!
@karennelson2779
@karennelson2779 Год назад
Hahaha, this was priceless!
@anotheruser676
@anotheruser676 Год назад
"declassified everything" So we can finally see those Taxes?
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