The CREEPIEST Messages 🤮 

As a lesbian, yes, the most common response I get when telling a dude who's hitting on me that i'm not into men is 'well you haven't tried MY penis'. Almost every single time. It's.. not fun

There's no non-creepy way to follow someone home without their knowledge 💀

I came up with a good 1-up for anti maskers. "You know the anti-mask movement was started by the NSA so they could continue reading your lips through security cameras, right?"

Imagine putting this in a Tinder Bio: "I'm an overall funny, ordinary person. I was once called "Breedable and Feminine" by a stranger on the internet"

As a guy I can say I've had some issues in the past with women being WAAAAAAY to eager to meet up and doing weirdly explicit things. As a survivor of sexual assault (from both men and women) that shit messes me up. Its especially bad being pansexual on dating sites and I get both male and female unsolicited naughties like "Please keep that to yourself."

I once read somewhere, i think it was tumblr that the best way to think of people that call themselves unironically "alpha" is to see it like in videogame development, where an alpha is a highly unstable version still in development

As someone who knits and crochets, you'd be amazed at just HOW MANY men ask you to "knit a cock sweater" for them. One time I agreed cuz hey, money is money, so I asked for size requirements, and he said I'd have to come meet him irl so I could get them myself. Yeah... that's the last time I agree to crochet anything for a total stranger.

I'm not a Karen but I'd be speaking to managers if a store employee used my customer info to stalk me. It was nice to chill on the stream and then watch the premiere with everyone. Thanks Click.

The creepiest thing that happened to me was when I called an ambulance for my daughter (she was fine in the end) Afterwards the paramedic stalked me on FB and sent me a message saying he likes petite women. The messages continued until I blocked him

"Well, you sound boring" "Yes! I can sit in the corner and pet the dog now." - the most relatable line out of the whole video. Thanks Cliccy! (walks away to pet the nearest floof in silence)

Dm's can be genuinely terrifying. Especially unsolicited... items

As a role player, people don't initiate role play with strangers before you find out if they are ok with it. Unsolicited role play is like unsolicited d*ck pics. Chat with them first and ask if they are into role play. If yes, then ask if they want to discuss doing a role play. If no, don't do the role play anyway and respect their choice. I love role play but I HATE it when people don't check to see if I am willing to role play with them and check what boundaries I have. Too many times, I have gotten s*xually harassed by people through unsolicited role play.

This is why I'm terrified of talking to people I've never met before, especially through texts.

It's people like this who make us roleplayers look bad. Roleplay is supposed to be done in a consensual and controlled environment, not just randomly on some social media page or someone's DMs with no context! It's so disturbing when people do that

I actually had someone text me, "*vomits cutely" followed up with, "uwu would you like to help me clean it up?? I'll do it for you for free nya" and I never felt my body want to reject it's existence so much before.

Just to make it clear. Cheating and being polyamorous are two very different things and not to be conflated. In an open or poly relationship you do things with both (or more) partners aware of what's happening and consenting with it. In cheating you're doing it behind your partner's back without telling them.

I once got someone in my DMs trying to convert me to Christianity because they found out I'm trans through a comment. Started off as asking questions and seeming genuinely curious then suddenly calling me names and talking about God. Anyway it was fucking hilarious and I just let them rambke for a while

Society is one giant RP session but no one ever breaks their character.

29:50 now to be fair the ten thousand bees saying "come outside" is just hilarious

As someone who has autism and social anxiety and often misses social cues I feel a lot better knowing I've never been in these situations and would never send messages like that

Every time I think humanity has reached rock bottom, I get surprised

There needs to be a study conducted on how these people think that *they* are the normal ones and the people who reject it are the weird ones. It's actually scary-

That dude trying to "change" the lesbian actually happened to me irl. I once went to a strip club as a bisexual woman because I wanted to try it out. For safety reasons, if anyone asked I would say I was a lesbian because of some of the clientele there being a bit eh, creepy. Then I had this dude straight up chat with me and tell me "I bet I can convert you" 🤮 bro, we are both here for the same thing. Let me enjoy the naked boobies in peace. Cease!

Click is TOO GOOD at reading asterisks 🤣 his eye contact during "*gazing into your eyes*" was so on point I got creeped out lmao

I love how most of these messages are just people that seem like they're making a fanfic on Wattpad but they accidentally opened Whatsapp or Instagram or whatever.

The grindr guy getting annoyed at the job question is so relatable, probably a "straight", maybe married, man trying a one night stand. Which is like 80% of the platform actually

The furry president one was genuinely pretty wholesome like, “Omg, what happened to all the college debt?” *smiles innocently* “It’s all on fire!”

My two favorite responses to unsolicited pics is send a pic with a magnifying glass back or send one of a bigger one back 😂

1:04 Let me tell you I JUMPED when he looked at the camera and said my name. My weak Victorian child like heart was not prepared for the shock I received from that-

As someone with postural hypotension (a drop in blood pressure when I stand up) and general low blood pressure I can confirm the way my doctor told me to fix it was not to eat salty foods, but rather to drink lots of water. Stay hydrated fellow condemned!

as a genshin player "why did you give me yoimiya at 9 pity when you knew i wanted kokomi" is hilarious because to get a character you need to roll for them, so despite wanting kokomi he rolled for yoimiya instead and was mad when he got the character he rolled for not only that, but the "fish claymore" is "luxurious sea-lord", which was a weapon that was available only in an event and was never available again. so he wants mihoyo to just give him an event weapon because why not lmao

The person getting mad at MiHoyo (Genshin Impact devs) is fucking hilarious

I'm about to relive all my dating trauma but Click makes it so much more bearable!

So many people just completely lack self-awareness.

Some of these people being weird in the middle feel like they're being deliberately off-putting in order to scare off unwanted advances. I used that a lot to great effect when I was a teenager before I mastered a haughty cold sneer that worked just as well. Girl's gotta have a versatile arsenal to stay safe! (and at least one guy in there)

Honestly if my husband got that "cleaner" DM I'd be like for $20 a week for four hours of work a day! He can absolutely come over. The clothes I want him to wear are jeans and a tshirt which he is NEVER to take off. The bathroom, baseboards and windows all need scrubbing so he can start there. Also my husband would be instructed to NEVER EVER leave me alone with him. I don't care if he has some sort of weird FemDom cleaning fetish, at $20 a week you can't be picky about your cleaning service.

My favorite response to unsolicited pictures is "Do you know how to administer an epi pen? Because I'm allergic to shrimp".

That reminds me, I always got the creepiest messages when I was in my teens. I didn't understand how bad they were either, because I didn't get the implications. It was really hard for me to say no back then too. I hope teens of today are less impressionable and stupid than me... got into quite a few pickles.

6:14 Dirty deeds done dirt cheap immediately came to mind when he said that was really affordable

“Ok so before I end up on r/creepypms” Man was self aware AND STILL continued to be a creep to a 14yo

Pipipicks in my dms were the sign that it's either spring or autumn. This year it's become illegal and punishable by law to send them so it's literally the first autumn i got none. Finally! Men just awkwardly try to talk and leave my dms when I ignore them. Ah, life's beautiful!

I once got a message online that was super creepy and full of asterisks. I was 14 and didn't know how to answer so I just wrote something like "I'm only interested in fantasy-type roleplay, sorry". He never replied back and blocked me :)

9:10 LMFAO I GOT A THERAPIST AD AT THIS POINT

Lol the guy with the fangs asking what was funny, I'd have been like "No one has ever threatened to role play me to death before."

The one-upping thing was done brilliantly in season 4 of Ghosts on BBC. Alison accidentally gets herself invited to a cult meeting and the couple are not letting her back out, so she starts actively talking to the ghosts in front of them while they are all in the room together, because she knows they'll think she's crazy and back out. She just joins in the existing conversation too, so it's really natural. Just the late Fanny Button being all "Certainly you CAN say whatever you want nowadays, but there are consequences. You can't just say 'I'm Mr Jellylegs of the wibble wobble continent' and expect to be taken seriously." which gives Alison the flash of inspiration to simply respond "That's a very good point Fanny."

I'm sorry I'm laughing so hard over Clicks pronounciation of Kokomi. That whole genshin review is the funniest thing I've heard all day

17:34 As someone who plays Genshin Impact casually, that post cringed me to the core 😬 but hearing Click reading the names wrong made my day, that was so funny xD

Click is so nice, he deserves his pillow to be ice cold every night in the summer.

The thing is those dudes think being creepy is something you do willingly, like "I didn't follow you home to spy on you, it was just to keep you safe so it's not creepy". Creepy is a behavior, not an intention

If someone sent me DMs about how they're going to self-harm or off themselves to emotionally manipulate me, I'd just send back a video of the JoJo torture dance meme.

Imagine if in the future some people think the gringe asterisk roleplaying is as normal as emojis now and starts their messages like "Hi boss *sweats nervously*" 😬

God, wtf was that Kroger cashier one??? That was beyond creepy, I would have gone full Karen in that situation and sent screenshots of those messages to the manager

31:45 the genuine confusion while he laughs had me rolling-

The review at 17:30 was for Genshin Impact, an Anime based open world RPG (really fun game actually). Basically what they are complaining about is something about a nerf on the character Sangonomiya Kokomi. A nerf I'm not aware of happened, I only know of her getting better with the Ocean-huws clam set. In any case they're complaining about a character getting nerft, getting Yoimiya (a pretty decent character) after 9 pulls meaning they still had time to build pity for Kokomi (also really lucky with the 5 star rate being at about 0.6% and only get a tiny bit higher at around 60-70, with a garante at 90), so they had incrediable luck. Also no, Mihoyo now known as Hoyoverse doesn't know what character you want. The wish system in Genshin is either a gambling/luck based or a whales/rich-mans system. Durning the roughly 1,5 years I've been playing (September, 2021) as f2p or the "gambling" aspect of the system I can say I wish I've gotten a 5 star in less than 40 pity but that hasn't happend. Oh well, a boy can dream. Edit - Also the "Fish claymore" is a weapon in game that only exicted during a limited event meaning that it might never come back.

18:10 if anybody wanted context for this bit This comment is abt a game called Genshin Impact (the game co or whatever is called Mihoyo,pronounced me-hoy-yo but is now called hoyoverse) Kokomi (koh-koh-me) was one of the 5-star playable characters that you could “wish for” -meaning turning in “wishes” in hopes that you pull a featured character. - within a certain time frame of like two weeks I think? The featured 5-stars are changed every two weeks or so with some characters being “rerun” meaning their banner has been featured again and others being brand new. Yoimiya (yoi-me-yah) probably had a banner before Kokomi. The wishing system works is the more pulls you pull without getting a featured character earns you “pity” which is like a percent increase of getting a featured 5-star character. When you get like 75-95 pity you’re basically guaranteed the next 5-Star you wish for. When you get a 5-Star, the pity is reset. You also probably won’t get the next featured 5-star, instead losing to a 50/50 where characters with no banner are pulled instead. (And they will reset your pity as well-even if they’re not featured) The dude was probly upset because he was only wishing on yoimiya’s banner to rack up pity and when he accidentally pulled her at 6 pity which is incredibly rare actually. In his case it was rare in the worst way. Many would also be a tad upsetti spaghetti but still, that person’s reaction was a tad much. Hope this answers any confusion abt that post Oh and the fish claymore was a limited time weapon that you had to do an event for. It doesn’t look like it’s coming back anytime soon but it was quite a meme for awhile. It’s like this giant fish that you can slap ppl with

Idk but I feel like it would be so wholesome if two asterisk people found eachother and just were cringy together in peace. It would be a win for everyone because they would be happy and able to be themselves and also not bothering other people

"I will clone you with whatever pieces I can find" is one of the most sinister things you've ever said, Mr. Click. Bravo.

18:57 That got me. I love Click's little recreations of the things he reads. Part of the only reason I even listen to this sort of Reddit stuff. He makes it hilarious!

6:32 …idea: hire him, put him in a sailor outfit. Invite him over to clean, but instead of having your wife there, invite a bunch of guys instead. Dude will NEVER bother you again, lol, especially if they’re all in the same outfit as he does.

I had the same issue with the phone number or the dog collar. For 6 months I was getting texts from some guy who got the number off the collar at the park. He sent the most graphic texts, tried to find as much about me as he could and kept telling to come back to the park and talk to him or he'd find out where I live and work and come talk to me there!

I never knew a Swedish man telling me I smell nice was something I needed in my life

2:27 for more of these tactics to stop the creeps, I highly suggest the preyingmantis subreddit. The creator, Mona the Mantis, is truly an artist of scaring/traumatizing weirdos away, she's really incredible

12:30 As someone who is ACTUALLY neurodivergent and a minor, I'm crying 🤣

You burping time to time while reading these makes them 10x comical. My mental age drops to kid which I appreciate. Also you changing voices for some texts are gold! Thank you for not editing burps out :D

When I was 19 I had a 56yr old man wanting to breed me on a date site. Then he got angry when I didn't answer him and started to cry about me apparently calling him ugly. I think the highest age for partner set in my profile was 26 :"D

As a Kroger employee of a few years now, I'm disappointed and disgusted but not too surprised by the creepy cashier. Last year I had a coworker start on my shift who managed to make all of us women/femmes feel uncomfortable and/or creeped out, but for some reason he zoned in on me (almost 20 years his junior, also the youngest person in general on the night crew at age 23/24 at the time) in particular to a degree that even other guys on our shift were weirded out by. But because of union codes and whatnot, there was only so much that management was able to do about him just always gawking like a creep, generally acting weird as hell, and even going so far as to asking me specifically where I live down to which apartment one morning when we happened to be leaving work in the same general direction. Best they could do was have multiple talks with him and move him to a different department where he'd be by himself, but unfortunately still be on the same shift and still actively go out of his way to make a problem of himself. It would've probably continued that way if he hadn't decided to quit after the umpteenth talking-to because (and I quote as per my shift lead, who had to have the talk with him this particular time) "I can't take this anymore, this happens everywhere I work and I can't do it. I'm going home, I quit" ("home" unironically being his mom's basement; she also works in the store and I've heard her mention it in passing, which would be whatever if he wasn't in his early 40s and still living with his reasonably healthy mom who lives off just a grocery store paycheck herself). Like.. my brother in christ, how can you be totally void of self-awareness like that? Do you just choose to not realize that the problem is you and not the place you work or who you work with, or what? And that's not even to mention another former coworker who got away with putting his hands on me without my consent (though at the same time I got away with threatening to crush his hands in the trash compactor if he ever put them on me again, so I meannn), and my current regional manager who (for legal purposes I must say ~allegedly~) is facing a harassment lawsuit bc he (repeatedly but allegedly) harassed the ladies/femmes working in the deli department of a different store in our area, on top of (allegedly) facing divorce and potentially losing his job... only now that he's (allegedly) staring down a whole ass lawsuit. And unfortunately, I'm willing to bet that not a lot was done about that creep cashier, even if the person on the receiving end of those texts did take it to management as they hopefully did. It's cool to be in a union, but it's significantly less cool when that same union unintentionally protects freaks like these. But on the up side, huge shout out to my current department head/friend/adopted dad for doing everything within his power to step in on my creeper situation and be in my corner however he possibly could. He didn't even know me that well at the time, but he saw how uncomfortable and angry I was, and what a fucking creep that guy was being, and he still did absolutely everything he could within company/union rules to help the situation on my end. Very grateful to him and my shift lead both for taking my/our concerns seriously and doing everything they were able to about the problem. I stan TJ and work dad. Edit afterthought: If you shop at a Kroger store and the cashier asks you for your alternate ID/rewards number (which is typically the phone number linked to your rewards account) instead of having you swipe/scan your actual rewards card or having you type the number on the debit/credit/etc. card pinpad-- red flag. Red flags all over.

Once got a DM from a stranger asking for my Snapchat. I spent the next ten minutes trying to explain that I didn’t have Snapchat and it was like talking to a brick wall

2:30 - one of my favourite stories is of a woman using a campus phone booth late one night and as she finished and headed back, some guy came towards her exposing himself and saying "what do you think?" Her response was a calm, "looks like a dick to me, but smaller" before continuing on her way.

14:13 “do you know do you have plenty of time with your hands making a novel than DMing someone with the amount of * you have” that is a genuine text I want people to send to these creeps

Never underestimate the power of the point and laugh to shut down creeps

5:18 it doesn’t surprise me that Clicky was getting all the ladies in his 20s. With quirky, smutty charisma like his, he could snag anybody.

22:51 best part is the message is “edited”

10:16 I understood every bit of that. Like what the hell is wrong with them?!

I swear there’s an entire subset of people who took PePe le Pieu entirely too much to hear as children and used his technique as a manual of how to get the girl. Then there’s an entire subset of girls who innocently wear a shirt of some nerd culture and just like the poor cat are suddenly being chased to the ends of the earth

I can understand asterisk roleplay with people you already know, or in a community that is used to it... but Oh My God there is a place and a time and it isn't with random people you barely know. Lesson here is just communicate normally with people you don't know!

17:54 is def satire ik that fandom w my soul💀💀

27:35 The texter could see the future and knew that a RU-vid would make a video involving their texts. This was an example of big brain foresight

Around 12:45, the thing you're describing sounds like "Poe's Law", very interesting to look into. Where parody and extreme things become so mingled from both existing, its hard to tell what's real between them anymore.

The vomits on carpet thing is especially funny to me because my sister used to try and skip work and make me go for her by pretending to be sick and threatening to throw up on my carpet.

I'm always shocked at how tall Click is whenever he stands up during a video. I don't think that fact will ever sink in with me

Treat asterisk roleplay like sex, people: informed mutual consent, and ideally kept to spaces made for it. 😂

As an artist and someone who used to do commissions the one with the commission just made me laugh way too hard. It's a sadly common thing as well just... "Ah yes, I'll promote you by retweeting and all this other stuff and you'll get more people commissioning you!" but... you do realize that a commission means you pay them for their work... right? It's... not a request or anything like that LOL

7:08 as a major halo fan, I apologise on behalf of this man

I spent some time in Texas recently..... and ngl, my #1 favourite part was IT'S ILLEGAL TO SEND UNSOLICITED NUDES! ....and I didn't get a single one while there. 🤷‍♀️

I feel like Peg and Al managed to turn creepy into funny. *Peg:* Didja miss me? 😁 *Al:* With every bullet so far~🙃

17:39 KOMIKI?? YOMIA?? 😭 such japanese 👍

Your ability to read anime dubs the way they are written is astounding. I would never guess what they wanted their messages to sound like in readers' heads, but now I know.

On that Halo DM, There's not a red flag large enough or big enough that could be seen from MARS. That dude was more creepy than spiders could ever be and he was even creeping ME out as I saw the DM

0:28 you left the door open so I let myself in.

Some text messages make me cringe so hard that it makes rocks look weak

18:15 I hate that as a Genshin player I not only know the context for this but also everything they are talking about. My best guess is this is either real, which mind you is most definitely not beyond this fandom, or it is deliberately making fun of the people that got mad at the first anniversary rewards, which is its own shitshow.

2:14 It somehow looks like every Tetris piece at once

7:55 ooh new measurement: yps - yikes per sentence.

the click is just great, he makes weird situations really funny

10:54 i thank god the click hasn't reached that boundary of forbidden knowledge

I'm loving Click's theatrics, he could be an actor fr haha.

I love reading how stupid these "draw me for free OWO" texts are, relatable

For some reasons 14:53 his face scared me bruh.

12:06 as a neurodivergent minor, wtf is this. You can still get a job bro. I work behind a cash register at a convience store, I'm Autistic, adhd, amongst some undiagnosed illnesses that I'm discussing with my councillor abt, AND I'm 17. Bro you can easily get some bank. don't pay for shit with money you don't have. Interpret that however way you wish it applies in every interpretation

I didn't really know what "*" were called in English so when I first heard it my brain thought "How do you write with a little blonde gaul that's about to kick some ancient roman bums ?" They are written as asterisk but I only heard Asterix made the video 100 times better