The Key to Jay-Z's Success: How Does He Deal With Family and Friends Asking for Money?

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17 июл 2022

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Комментарии : 240

@AC-ro6ib 2 года назад

My dad once called me selfish for not lending money to a family member and co-signing their car loan. It was one of the most hurtful things anyone had ever said to me at that time, especially considering how much I had given to family and sacrificed to help them, even though I was broke. I was 24 years old and a recent college graduate. I had also begun listening to Dave Ramsey around that time, and he instilled in me many of the financial principles that I still follow today, including not lending money to family. I worked, dug myself out of debt, and begun saving. I'm now 37, and I refuse to allow anyone, including family, to get in the way of my progress. I believe in helping family, but I will not jeopardize my financial future and wealth to do so.

@naturalnikki8675 2 года назад

Great comment! I had a similar experience with my mom and grandma wanting me to loan a family member $2,400. I had just finished grad school and was working my first real job. They were so negative about it, stating that something bad would happen to me one day. I stood on what I learned from Suze Orman and didn’t budge.. Turns out the family member was addicted to drugs and smoking up every $ they had.

@MsMockingbird06 2 года назад

You are very wise. You do NOT sound selfish at all! Congrats on your financial progress 😁

@brittanywhite3151 2 года назад

I love this mindset!!!

@Naymichelle76 2 года назад

Amen!!

@samiamserenity 2 года назад

@@MsMockingbird06 my sentiments e-x-a-c-t-l-y !

@scrappington2669 Год назад

Bro, this is big facts! That was an awesome topic and well said. Too often people feel burdened to do for family or friends because they,ve made it to a certain status. Do what you can where you can. It should never feel like a job or task. We have got to break that cycle of obligating the next generation or family member to take care of us. Everyone is born with a shot and no one owes anyone anything. No matter what your circumstances were, somebody somewhere had it worse and made things shake.

@paolokoch1123 Год назад

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@hyescallum5107 Год назад

It’s best to start early to plan your future by making important financial decisions which can help you build passive income and make you live comfortably. I realized that the secret to becoming rich isn’t having multiple jobs but multiple sources of income. In this modern time there are lot of passive income stream and as such everyone should be involved in something profitable.

@IAMJESSIEMAI 2 года назад

“Don’t do business with family!” Best advice hands down.

@wanjawandia1786 2 года назад

Every foreigner that has made it to America understands this struggle with their family back home.

@absolutetreasures6877 2 года назад

As a Jamaican, I know all about this.

@noirefit5954 2 года назад

Family and friends will financially abuse you worst than anyone. I’ve had to tell cousins to stop asking me for money. They still ask and I just hit them with silence. I’m a single mom putting myself through school. Meanwhile, they are laying around not doing anything. NO!

@culturesquotes 2 года назад

Silence is the best reply. It say's "figure it out".

@GullahGeecheeFarmer 2 года назад

You also miss out on opportunities to make money thinking every relative wants a hand out instead of a hand up and they get put on by white people. It has to stop at some point.

@Hoops-33 2 года назад

Capitalism

@SharVanityBeauty Год назад

Yessss omg

@samiamserenity 2 года назад

Excellent advice & mentality "little Anthony" 🙂 If you notice, the people that try to make you feel bad about not loaning your personal money, or extending your personal credit for (co-signing on loans) or committing financial future suicide on behalf of someone else is usually people that don't have it to loan themselves, but busy counting your money and trying to make you feel bad about your decisions. Don't stand for it ! The only other thing I would add to this is if you are a property owner or investor of any kind.... DO NOT RENT OR SELL TO FAMILY OR FRIENDS unless you want angry haters and enemies instead !

@taneishareid9461 2 года назад

This is so good! Thank you for your continued knowledge. This one is a whole sermon lol

@saynicole09 2 года назад

I've learned to say no because soon as you ask for your money back it's all of a sudden "funky money" 😂😂

@kimberlyagee7338 2 года назад

Yep and some of them have the audacity to get mad because you had to ask them for your money that they agreed to pay back.I learned a hard lesson.

@anight8661 2 года назад

I totally agree, the best thing we can do for family and friends, is to lead by example, if they don't want to put in the discipline, effort, and the sacrifice, then they are not serious.

@sonyamichaels6068 Год назад

Great advice! I figured if I can manage on my own without borrowing from family, they should make a real effort to do the same. Set bounderies with everyone!

@icberg2glac 2 года назад

@AO this should be a conversation topic. Setting boundaries with family and friends. Especially with money

@hhonore68 2 года назад

I’m the giver in my family but the way and God blesses me over and over🙏🏾!

@ashleyjones5396 2 года назад

I’ve put boundaries in place with our family members in the last few years. We don’t let family borrow money. If we have it and want to give it, we will but it’s on our terms.

@darlinnikki9514 2 года назад

I will not shy away from discussing money with my family. The best thing you can give any person is GOOD ADVICE. I do not tell them what to do, but I refer them to the resources that got me to where I am. I do not lend money at all. I am willing to GIVE money depending on the circumstance and to the right person. The right person is not the family member who is spending up all of their money and borrowing from you to spend more.

@TammieFleming510 2 года назад

Iove it AO!!!!Awesome!!!I sent this to my husband. This is something concrete that we will implement as well as how much would we give not looking for it to be paid back. Only if we choose...Look your Work!!!Blessings

@princeofthereptiles4422 2 года назад

need more of these short bursts of wisdom

@miamya8510 2 года назад

I agree. We were taught never to lend what you couldn't afford to just Give. While I do SEW SEEDS, I'm in wealth-building mode; which means we utilize money as a tool, we don't throw it away. Lending, in most cases is throwing money away. Survey says ❌❌❌

@Leenece 2 года назад

Wish I could give this multiple likes. Wisdom. Thank you for this one, AO.

@EvaVas03 2 года назад

I was living at my parents and paid rent. But I noticed my mom was paying my brother's rent so I moved out. It's weird I was scared and now debt free this was 4 years ago. How I assumed I couldn't make it on my own.

@killersentra 2 года назад

I'd still be living with my mother personally.

@kamikraroberts2085 Год назад

This is the best advice about lending money. 100% of the time I have never gotten it back from family members or friends, but did have the mindset of giving it without ever receiving it back. And I made sure that the $ amount would not put me in a bind. I agree with everything you said.

@TYPthePYT 2 года назад

I found that interview a few days ago and it was phenomenal!

@andreamiller135 2 года назад

I don’t mind when my family asks for help every now and then. I am blessed due to my working hard but I did not get there by myself. People helped me and some cards lined up differently for me than others and I acknowledge that. But like you - I don’t lend. I give. I do say no. And I have the money sent aside. But I seriously consider whether they can manage what I give. If I give I want the gift to just be a step to the next thing.

@maureengolding2980 2 года назад

I have lost so much money to so called friends and family members. I don't have cable, I don't buy name brands, I frequent the libraries or used books from EBay. People just watched me and want to cry on my shoulders, married and singles. I work hard, they can get second jobs too. Amen.

@isabellopes890 3 месяца назад

It’s because they might see you as an ATM. I would keep my distance. Don’t trust all tears. Protect yourself.

@zacmann7850 2 года назад

The biggest companies are family businesses, family is power. I think it’s important to talk with family about money and business that’s how you can teach everyone how many works and how to take advantage.

@moe_ramz 8 месяцев назад

They’re not extended family businesses. It’s a man and his wife and kids. Not parents, cousins etc….

@terellkid1 2 месяца назад

@@moe_ramzthis ^

@kesha6974 2 года назад

Love this video and thank you. This is exactly how my brother is. He don’t want to tell people no and he gets burned by them. I just sent him this video and I pray he watches and take heed to this. He worked hard to get where he is and I want him to continue to grow. I have asked for money but I say have in case I won’t be able to pay it back but I also learned that if they say no it’s ok, they may not have it but it is what is. It’s their money and I’ve begun my budgeting process to help myself and grow from there. Much love 💜

@lekeshapoole3284 2 года назад

Good stuff. Totally agree....

@Ladeine 2 года назад

Everytime I lend folk money, they don’t pay me back. I find it very disrespectful! The bank is closed over here!!

@ginalmencymarketing 2 года назад

Amen! It makes me sick how people you help in a bind can be so disrespectful.

@catherinensereko9040 2 года назад

I give to those that are doing something sensible with their time, money, and are hard working; but only one time. And I don’t ask them how it went/is going. I then strongly advise them not to tell anybody about it, which keeps others from lining up for the same even if it leaks out.

@vic_cky8756 2 года назад

I am in agreement with what was said in the video but I guess context for each situation is key. What I also thought about when listening to the video is that as Christians, we are led by the spirit and God can ask you to support that Cousin's bussiness despite your boundaries, (it can happen), with GOD nothing is set on stone, the only thing can never change is his Holiness and everything about his Word and Caracter. I personally allow myself to have room for 'flexibility' in the approach stated in the video when it comes to family and finances. We are blessed to be a blessing. However, I believe it all boils down to being wise and have discernment because, if you come across someone asking for your help, it doesn't mean you should do what is asked of you, rather you might need to discern how to help, and saying no to someone might be the greatest help from you at that time and saving you both from undesirable circumstances later on.

@seanjean9677 2 года назад

My mom stopped working a few years ago due to health issues. I was helping her financially until she went and got a second car note (a second Jaguar). She now has two Jaguars with two car payments sitting in the yard. I stopped giving her as much money because I saw that she didn’t need it. She now says, “I want her to lose her vehicles” and “If it was coming from the heart it wouldn’t matter what I spend it on.” Meanwhile I have student loans from med school, a mortgage, have to catch up on retirement. So I have to pay for my past, present, and future and my mom is talking about me and how I should spend my money

@godsgracewithtauragibson898 2 года назад

set boundaries no matter who it is. i can relate

@godschild5189 2 года назад

So sorry your mom is treating you like that. Honestly, I would demand she sell both those expensive vehicles and buy a nice used car for cash. She could use the extra money to pay her bills.

@farirn642 2 года назад

Strong boundaries... I would cease all financial support until both of those cars are replaced by a car that match her wealth or income or economic status. She should take advantage while it's still a seller's market. It's unfair for people in need to expect someone else to fund their lifestyle when it is not the cheapest lifestyle possible.

@seanjean9677 2 года назад

She would never listen to that advice. She had one more payment left on her Chrysler 300 when she added the 1st Jaguar to her collection. Then she was diagnosed with cancer and quit her job. I didn’t make a big deal of that because she gave the Chrysler to my sister and had the Jaguar before she quit. But when she added the second one, I couldn’t look past it. I drive a Honda Accord.

@seanjean9677 2 года назад

I only pay for her health insurance now. She told me if I was giving her money from my Heart then it wouldn’t matter what she spends it on. All of this when I am I’m debt for my education and my mother has not built anything for us. I do understand she was a single mother and it was tough but if you can’t build an inheritance for us, at least don’t take from us when you don’t need it.

@LadysongbirdLesha 2 года назад

A family member just literally ask me for money just as I'm watching this video.

@kimberlyagee7338 2 года назад

🤣🤣

@esinamyevu7039 Год назад

😂😂😂

@4EVABLESSED7 2 года назад

This is good!!! I needed to hear this.

@kimberlyowens5496 2 года назад

Loan only what you can afford to lose. It's bad that other communities can work together have business together but we have to be on eggshells and constantly tell each other no it's going to be hard to build wealth when we don't build or have good family ties and Trust

@misscamdennjusa2024 2 года назад

Facts 💯 💯 💯 I feel like I paid my dues. Yes, I can not afford to risk my peace...

@MsMockingbird06 2 года назад

I stopped letting people borrow money and started giving because I knew they couldn’t afford to pay it back. Then the same people kept asking over and over again, it’s like they felt entitled to my money that I work hard to earn. I no longer give because it was supporting their bad money habits and I didn’t see them working as hard as me. Now, I provide resources and offer to help with budgeting. I’m in baby step 2 now, but when I’m in baby step 4, I may create a giving budget for family and only give to those taking the actions to help themselves.

@wellsaid7192 2 года назад

Great vlog 👍😊

@bhprealestatesolutionsllc6281 2 года назад

I’ve learned to have a line in my budget just for giving to my family. It has helped a lot. It builds even if they don’t ask for anything for the month and I don’t have to tap into other funds if it’s an emergency. Been doing this for a couple of years now after I started to tell them “no” when I couldn’t afford to give anything.

@annfredericks7341 2 года назад

good lessons. in my community (somewhere in africa) i have seen people who gave their all and were not able to prepare for old age. then in their 60s onwards when they would ask for help from the people they helped, these same people and their grown up children would say that the helper was foolish and wasted his/her money and did not even build a house, acquire investment assets,etc...basically laughing at the person ,mocking them for not investing for old age! conveniently forgetting how this person paid for all their school fees, gave loans that were never paid back etc. PEOPLE TAKE CARE OF YOUR FINANCIAL WELFARE just like they say on a plane (adults wear a mask before you mask up your kid!!) before you deal with your relatives and friends. """"don't burn yourself to keep others warm""""". GREAT VIDEO

@boricio74 2 года назад

Great advice

@jackieferrarimusic 2 года назад

That's also actually really smart to have a budget for helping family and friends. Such a good tip :)

@invadercem2 2 года назад

Glad I accidentally clicked on this video. You gave me something to be very great full about!

@moetube74 2 года назад

I give family money if I can afford it. My wife and I were told a long time ago by elders that if you "loan" money don't expect it to be given back. Therefore only give it if you know it's money you don't need. I actually hate it when people ask for money as a loan and say they will pay it back because I feel like you are being dishonest. Just ask for it if you really need it.

@tanitrarobinson7477 2 года назад

If I loan it I expect it back....heck the banks do if they were to borrow from them.

@moetube74 2 года назад

@@tanitrarobinson7477 Exactly. That is why I don't "loan". I give if I can afford it. We have been burned by a few family and friends who promised they would pay us back.

@mariacorretge6615 Год назад

I wish we had listened to this video years ago. Thank you.

@thetruth5635 2 года назад

Family and money does not mix

@essencemontgomery87 2 года назад

Whew! My goodness! You are helping me today ♥️

@404TRUCKERTV 2 года назад

He's 100 on that circle!

@ringc. Год назад

I have loaned money out to family many times who in return were late in paying me back but used that money to start businesses and repaid me back 3x more than I loan as a token of appreciation. I see so many people who would not loan and help out family and I get wanting to avoid bad blood…but…I don’t know if I entirely agree with not helping.

@Belladorphia 2 года назад

It doesn’t pay to ask your family for money only in emergency situations. Everyone needs a little help now and then. I rather work 5 jobs rather than ask anyone for anything. 9 times out of 10 family will talk about you borrowing money. It’s better to give than receive god always bless a cheerful giver. 🙏🏽

@gsaunders8771 2 года назад

It is bad to give family money because if they don’t have it now how will they have it later. Duhhh that’s why they are asking to borrow.

@donnaharris9022 2 года назад

I agree, if you are in a position to just give the money and not make it a loan then give it. That way you don't have to end a relationship over money when they don't pay you back.

@lovelaidbare 2 года назад

Agreed! If I can’t afford to lose it, I won’t give it!

@pamelahendersonbrown917 2 года назад

I have loaned money that I didn’t expect to get back, but I feel like I don’t have to worry about them asking again if they didn’t pay me back!

@Legacy_125 2 года назад

That wine room is amazing.

@lisare6254 2 года назад

I've had to learn the hard way...lots of time and money wasted. I'm glad I saw the light before it got too late... my financial security is far more important than anything else at this moment. If your friends and family cannot understand that...too bad. I saw a fb post the other day where a man quoted "save your money, so that your money can save you"

@Lapreghiera 2 года назад

I agree and do the same thing with "giving" outside my household. If I give it's gone. I also feel the not doing business includes the realtor cousin who thinks they are owed being buying and/or selling agent for you. They out here getting tight about it.

@ForHisGlory2393 2 года назад

Wow! A close family friend of mine who’s a millionaire doesn’t lend money either. He has an amount that he’ll give when people ask but he won’t go beyond that. He too says people don’t really pay you back and he doesn’t want conflict, so he’ll give a certain amount and you’ll have to find the difference.

@ashleyjones5396 2 года назад

I like this option!

@goohman 2 года назад

There's a great book about relationships and money. It's Broke Millennial Talks Money. I've found a lot of tips that would have helped me in various ways over the years. I also choose not to give money unless I know for sure that I can do without that money.

@absolutetreasures6877 2 года назад

As a Jamaican that is a member of the US Army, there are times when my family think I’m getting a sure paycheck so I got it. None went on deployments with me, none kept my children, heck they’ve never even sent my children a b-day card, but expect me to send for their children. Borrowed my money and never return it or treated my giving as something I should do. I now have no problem saying no! However, I’ll still give, but on my terms.

@monique_pryce 2 года назад

Hoooooo boy, am I familiar with that Jamaican mentality. A lot of my family members seem to equate America with endless cash. Little do they now how much it’s a struggle to make ends meet here. It got to the point where my mom was incredibly weary of any 876 number popping up on her phone. 😂😂

@dasheca 2 года назад

I do but they have to take a financial literacy class. We have facilitated two courses FPU being one of them. I have found that most of them have never heard of them or don't how to get out of debt, invest, set a budget or balance a checkbook. Then I encourage them to tell someone something there doing to change their mindset for accountability.

@towannadunnhairexperience4367 2 года назад

This is a great video 🙌🏽

@anthonyoneal 2 года назад

Thank you!!

@andreanalife 2 года назад

I would if i had it but it will be evaluated before just giving. I know how it feels to really need it and nobody to turn to for help. Im one to not ask unless i know i have no other choice during a rough time.

@dorothywinslowaddell7347 2 года назад

I watched that conversation last night Gotta have boundaries

@tawandatate791 2 года назад

You know what thats the truth. THERE ARE BOUNDARIES with family..My yesss are expensive it cost to much. If i can give it i will otherwise i don't.

@jasondima1411 2 года назад

That’s a real good segment! I just talked to my wife about this. We give money to family that are investing in themselves and their future. But if you don’t take life seriously or have a vision and all you want to do is be a taker, I won’t give you a dime

@queensag7753 Год назад

U read my mind on having a budget set aside for family, of course they won't know what that is

@LivingLifeWithBree 2 года назад

New subscriber here.. personally I don’t lend money family and friends will do you the worst family feels too entitled.. I’m not obligated to give you money at all!!

@feliciakirksey9015 2 года назад

I agree to a certain point. If God has blessed you with millions and even billions and you see family "suffering" scraping and barley making it, and I don't mean lazy, not working, and with their hand out. I mean hard working Immediate" family members , who work JUST as hard as you, however the jobs that society says is not worth paying compared to those of entertainers, athletes, etc, but you chose to only consider your rich friends as worthy of your gifts, then I feel that is a problem. You did not get there with out help, and I feel it is important to give back, give family members (working family) a leg up, not a hand out. Other races do. Sometimes your cards just got dealt better, that doesn't mean forget where you came from or the ones who helped you get where you are!!

@truthsutherland3335 2 года назад

Solid.

@TWTTV 2 года назад

Just started watching your channel fam you have absolutely some great content keep this up you're helping Alot of people believe it or not we are in the process of building wealth now and am getting alot of tips from u brother keep it going

@mubafaw 2 года назад

Wise man 😊👍

@debrawilliams2781 Год назад

To lend is to know YOU WILL NEVER GET IT BACK, ITS BEST TO GIVE WITH NO STRINGS ATTACHED, OR SIMPLY DON'T DO IT!

@mercy_52 Год назад

Let’s talking 📩;

@MeaningfulMiles 2 года назад

I learned the lessons of sowing vs loaning and not doing business with family the hard way a long time ago! I’ve owned a franchise for the past 20 years that could employ a lot of family members and friends but I also learned not to hire them to maintain the peace and good relationships.

@ginalmencymarketing 2 года назад

Hello, what kind of franchise do you have?

@MeaningfulMiles 2 года назад

@@ginalmencymarketing In-home care for Seniors called Home Instead

@ginalmencymarketing 2 года назад

WOW! I've thought about that industry as well. Would you be willing to discuss how you got started with me?

@MompreneurLady 2 года назад

Yes AO! I don't believe in borrowing or loaning a famiky Members of relative money. It messes up relationships. I velieve in blessing them instead... if I can afford it💕💕💕

@jackieferrarimusic 2 года назад

Great video

@jayr6839 2 года назад

Here’s why you should stop lending money: 1. The will never pay you back. 2. It encourages them to keep asking for more. 3. Their problems will never be solved. 4. They never invest it wisely. 5. They can never help you when you need any help. 6. Most of them are ungrateful, once they get the money they disappear until they need more money again. 7. Just save your money and enjoy life. Stop spending life in your 20’s and 30’s trying to solve other peoples problems. Take care of yourself.

@alanac3764 11 месяцев назад

What about your parents or kids?

@killersentra 2 года назад

I loan money to family. We are looking at their income and expenses first if they really want it. Signed /dated/documented. Loans are treated the same way banks do bussiness.

@NitrousXProductions 2 года назад

I personally experienced this a few months ago. A close friend of mine asked me for money. He said he was in abit of debt and I mistankly said that I had come into some financial increase. Any way he asked if he could borrow from me and pay me back. I wasn't in a position to afford to give him money but said I would think about it. Gave it some thought and did some math said I couldn't help him. Long story short he's now managed to get another job to pay off his bills. Sometimes money is not always the answer. In most cases it's better for the person in need to work a way out to sort their issues. Whether it's to get a 2nd job, start a new business or go to citizens advice bureau. Helping people can actually do the reverse and can enable people to become dependent on you. In more ways than one. I'm happy my friend was able to pay his way. As AO said hate to have a expectation with my friend to pay me back and they don't. Then they leave a bad sour taste in the relationship. Don't want that to harbor my relationships in any way.

@Iamexalted 2 года назад

Yeah, money is always not an answer. Thank you.

@roolyfe 2 года назад

I want a prenuptial agreement AO!

@PearlPugh 2 года назад

If I have it, I give it. When I cannot, I do not.

@JustGloriaJTvAfrica 2 года назад

I agree

@maureengolding2980 2 года назад

For real!

@stephanie8202 2 года назад

A yes is way too expensive 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

@Zaycream21 2 года назад

Dang...that ' what have you sacrificed first? ' type of logic is the one

@derrickricketts7843 2 года назад

I use to give family and friends money and I stop now because when I whant it I can't get money from them I afto go threw my own financial struggle You can't save the world so the same way your working hard for your money that's the same way your family and friends should work hard for there own money because they will break you down financially

@joseasantiago30 Год назад

So if someone said they'll pay me back and they don't pay me back, well now they can't ask for more favors.

@keoshahenry 2 года назад

This was a really good video and I feel like everyone else should be well versed on keeping your funds to yourself.

@Omilloadams 2 года назад

I’m not giving you anymore just because you know I got it plus $4800 is outrageous to give any family member and except a return. 💯

@marleshafears2524 Год назад

I feel the same way if I can't give the money without taking an L...period!

@godschild5189 2 года назад

I have loaned family and adult kids money numerous times to my detriment. They never stop coming and don't pay back. I am retired due to disability, raising a grandchild, and they still beg. My youngest daughter has a great paying job but won't make payments on credit card I used for her furniture. Yet, she has taken 4 mini vacations this year. One son charged over $2,000 on cc of mine. He is a truck driver but doesn't speak to me since moving. The oldest daughter owes a little over $400 but everytime we're together begs for something. Currently, she wants me buy her a laptop. Never repays but financially supports her boyfriend who refuses to work. I am raising a grandchild from my youngest son. He just had a baby with a different woman but works sporadically. He lives with his dad who's my ex. That's just my kids! Done giving to family!!!! I am on a fixed income but now have credit card debt that didn't benefit me.