Fight, Flight or Freeze. 1- Slow everything down, take a pause to notice what is happening, and take a deep breath. 2-Show yourself some compassion and understanding. 3-Write down your thoughts. 4-Examine what you wrote down, and remove untrue statements, those exaggerated and hyperbolic statements. 5- Remove those untrue statements. 6-Look for exceptions to the thoughts and challenge their accuracy.
Hi everyone.... So timely! A loved one just called me crying about this, because she was "triggered"! I sent her this video, and sent her my love and support. I love the support you offer, Julia. Thank you!
Does anybody else find themselves being more mentally weighed down by the more minor stuff than the major stuff we all go through?? Odd but it's relevant to myself personally. Over thinking. Over catastrophise. Paranoia coming with anxiety
Grounding and focusing your consciousness will change everything. Duality is a game we play when we are in our headspace "Us vs Them" dialogue, seperation. The field of neutrality is found in the heart, Om Namah Shivaya (Universal Consciousness is One) connection. An easy way to ground and be in the heart space is to meditate with bloodstone or rhodonite. Just carrying it with you will do nothing. Sit down and really let go. Sleeping with these crystals under your pillow will help too. If you're feeling REALLY anxious check out Lepidolite, it has lithium in it. It's the best crystal for anxiety. I also found prophecy stone to help stay really grounded- it has an added benefit of helping us catch ourselves when our thoughts are wandering. Holding a crystal in each hand creates a circuit. Give it a shot. Let me know what your experiences are. Id love to hear how they work for you.
Alcohol makes my mental health sooooo much worse, so 4 days ago I decided to not drink anymore even tho I haven't drank since Superbowl Sunday anyway but that was more so because I haven't really had the time to sit down and relax with a beer. But I've been drinking for 10 years now and honestly I don't even enjoy it anymore, Its just a major waste of time, money, and life!
That was true for me too. It usually relaxes me at first, then the more I drank, it made me angry and mean and then sad and weepy. I’m 7 yrs sober and it’s so worth it. God bless you on your journey.
Hi Julia. Yet another timely video! lol And even though I know this information and been a Shifter for two years, I still need refreshers. I am giving myself compassion because I know how it hard it has been for me lately and it makes harder to manage my mind. However, I have never given up...even though some days it has been harder than others. So here are my notes! I broke this down and see if that helps anyone else here: • Triggers (activating event) • Thoughts about activating event. (It can trigger a past wound.) • Take Deep Breaths. • Slow down and regulate our physical bodies. • Notice what is going on. Noticed going on in your body. • Don't judge or criticize yourself. • You can give yourself compassion. • Writing down whatever thoughts you are going through your head. Brain dump journal. • Pull out any thoughts that are just inaccurate or not true. (Cognitive distorted thoughts) • Look for alternative perspectives and challenge those unhelpful and untrue thoughts. To anyone who is reading this, remember you are all worthy and valued people. May you all be safe, happy, peaceful and live with ease. ♥
i have the "im never going to be good enough for that specific person" type thing, for women in general. whenever i hear a woman talking, i always fabricate this interaction, that she's making snide remarks about me. then i imagine that she's being way too emotionally invested, which is abusive in the other direction. i am trying to convince my brain that these are completely imagined. it also helps to accept my anger, that this WOULD be something i would have a right to be angry about. even though its not really happening, if it was, i would have every right to be angry. and it helps to EXHALE - THROUGH the anger. rather than deny the anger and then exhale.
Hi! Former shifter here - I just want to say that for anyone who's watching this and thinking "wow this is exactly what I need, I'm so tired of being emotionally reactive" you should REALLY consider joining the shift society. I would honestly even call this video an intro to the shift society, but it goes so much more in depth with tools you can use to implement this stuff in your day to day life. Thank you for the work you're doing, Julia!
You are just so sweet Julia.Why just not more of us listen to you by trading all those toxicity out there.The solution to pollution is delusion. You are definitely helping many just letting you know.Go write more books.We need tangible solutions for our lifestyle.Thank you for all you do.
Good morning and blessings and prayers to you all. Julia, your words and insight are incredibly helpful. Hugs and prayers for healing for you all 🙏🙏✝️🤗
Recently ive expressed to my mom and dad that i want to try living in a group home for special needs people. Then mom tells all my sisters about it. I feel like everyone is mad at me for wanting to try this. But i still want to try this. So even though its hard trying to express my thoughts and feelings: but i am still trying to do this because if i dont speak up know it may never come out. I feel like with everything going on i have a lot of anxiety and depression going on to. Since i havent bean able to go to counciling on my own, ive bean trying to watch these videos instead for know. It helps me feel a little more at ease for know.
I’m shifter Denise R. Yes yes and yes. I’m learning that my triggers are all about me and how I feel or what I think about myself . Thank you so much 😊
Denise I was a fellow shifter as well. I love Julia so much she has so much invaluable advice and is such a good communicator! I am very proud to humbly call myself a Shifter 😊❤
Joan Ryan here..just got over emotional anxiety attack. Was triggered by past events. Really need to learn to manage this. Appetite is very poor at the moment. Cant stop apologising
I have this friend, who is depressed and not getting help for it, and he loves to be negative. And this effects my mood sometimes. I remember one time I came back from a music festival and I was sharing with him how during the festival and even after the festival I was feeling so happy. I felt on top of the world. And I was happy while telling him this. His response was "If you lost weight you'd feel like this all the time." I have not had that "on top of the world feeling" since his comment. Am I letting him effect my feelings too much? More recently, I was REALLY excited to see Avatar 2. Avatar 1 has been my favorite movie since it came out in 2009. I've been looking forward to this sequel since, and so has this friend of mine. Once the movie premiered my friend saw it immediately and then dropped a bunch spoilers and started complaining about the movie. And it made me not excited to see it anymore. But I went anyway. But through-out the movie ALL I could think about were my friend's comments and it really ruined the movie for me. And now I'm very upset that I didn't like it because maybe I would have liked it if he hadn't said anything about it. Am I letting him have too much control over my emotions? I want to like this movie and I asked him not to talk with me about the movie anymore, because my plan is to try to forget about it and then re-watch it months or years later. But he continues to complain about it. Do I need to just stop being friends with him, since he can't be positive about anything and he brings me down in really major ways? I'm very upset that I didn't like the movie and first I went into fight mode and attacked my friend for ruining the movie for me. But I cannot control how he acts. So do I run away and cut off the friendship? I think this is effecting me more than it should. But also, this was the ONLY movie I was excited for. For 13 years! I'm not a movie buff. This was literally the only movie I was looking forward to and it was ruined before I even saw it. Is my anger at my friend justified? How do I handle my very strong emotions here?
His reaction is fear of your happiness as it means in his head you don’t need him. So he says something to bring you down and even things up a bit. When you’re ready think about surrounding yourself with positive people. This is really good for you and combats negativity (toxicity) from other sources 🥰
Thank you for this. I've decided when I feel this was I am just going to pretend I have to pee and walk away for 5 minutes so I can breathe and get myself back together. 😊
Love this! What a great idea to break the emotional hijack and recharge the brain. Just having to think through getting to the bathroom and back can help calm our nervous system Dow.
Hi everyone my name is hailey: i have bean watching a lot of these videos about triggers, anxiety and depression. I have bean struggling alot emotionally lately with trying to stick up for my self for the 1st time with alot going on. Having the feeling certain people being mad at me for it, but i also cant hold my feelings in all the time anymore and cant continue trying to protect everyones feelings. So by watching your videos julia kristina you have bean helping me by teaching me how to stick up for my self i am special needs, its always bean harder for me trying to stick up for my self but i am trying to work on it. Ive always bean really emotional but im still trying to work on it.
I'm new and I just found u today. Great knowledge and wisdom. This hits home base but I got into a 3 day full fledge deptessed state. I'm goid at repressed feelings and condemn myself for days or years of my addiction shame or regret. I'm a professional freeze and flight and procrastination. Your steps are wordy and confusing and alot of them so I get lost with adhd. I have hard time expressing myself in healthy ways so writing it down could help me.
Hello Julia, I have read your new book. Your teaching has helped me immediately and immensely manage my reactions and more comfortably turn them in to constructive responses resulting in relationship healing, improvement, and repair. Thank you for all the work you do bringing better to society. I truly believe you're engaging in life saving work. Do you have anything going on tiktok? I'm finding lots of people there in need of your help. Yesterday, I shared a couple of your youtube links there.
I can bring myself back to conscious awareness , by using my breathing and noticing what's happening in my body, and noticing how I'm feeling. Once I've achieved this, I can then think clearly, to decide what I want to do or say to them next. I may need to disengage from the person so I can process the trigger, and then decide how I want to respond.
This is really helpful. I've just worked through for a work situation. Feeling more balanced and able to say that's just not true. I have evidence to prove it
When I get into a trigger trap, I pour concrete under my feet. Sometimes not enough concrete... that's true. "Serenity Now!!" Many emotional triggers come from pride.
Sweet you got Julia's i I believe it's her very first book 📖 book awesome 😀 I had the privilege of working with the Shift Society for 6 months. I highly recommend anything that Julia does 😊 Thank you for sharing ❤
A new subscriber here. I love your videos! What an insightful this one is too! THANKS!! Yes, trigger means it is associated with past wounds, unsolved problems. We need to go deeper to see what actually is happening. And Healing must be done.
Shifter here! I’ve been triggered at work at have gone into the fight mode with my boss and I am mad at myself, ruined my character, blowing others’ mind about how I handled myself. So not proud of myself! Yes , things are hitting a sore spot, frustrated with the LACK!!!! Of management and how they are just letting us HANG with staying way under staffed when other offices are completely fully staffed. And my boss is off or has to leave work early ALLL the time! I am lashing out! Not helpful!
One of the simplest and most helpful things I've learned in the Shift Society is the phrase "It's understandable that.." that I reacted a certain way, felt something, did something, etc. What a powerful tool for self-acceptance!! No matter how many people tell me "just love yourself! Self-love is so important! You can't love others until you love yourself! Be your own best friend! ,Etc!!" None of that sunk in or helped me in the least, until I was able to look at some aspect of myself or my character that I didn't like and say. " Well, that's not my best feature or finest moment, but IT'S UNDERSTANDABLE THAT...I did that or felt that or reacted that way. HUGE shift for me!! That enabled me to start offering myself compassion, acceptance, and yes, even love!
Good morning! I absolutely LOVED your book “Drive your own darn bus!” Thank you for your masterpiece as I didn’t know I needed it. Truly helped me make first and easy steps in taking charge of my life! 💖😄✨
I've also learnt that I need to stop my little brain from overtaking my big brain, which is the emotional and reasoning reasoning parts of the brain. If I let my little brain override, and just react emotionally in the moment, then I'm actually reinforcing the negative belief and thoughts that were triggered, not to mention getting a negative Outcome.
This is soooo helpful. A lot of info to retain, go back and breakdown and apply. I can use mostly all of this. I've been on this path the past few years of paying close attention to what's going on inside me. This is like icing on the cake. Thanks!!
Love it! There are a lot of people in the world that we may come into contact with that have their own issues going on. Learning to stay mentally strong and not react by our triggers is so important. Thank you for the book! I will definitely be getting it. I am happy I stumbled across these videos!
I just finished your book and it is awesome. I love your videos. Such sage wisdom, coming from such a bold and dramatic woman. A true wolf spirit for sure!
Opps accidentally sent that before finished 🧐🤓😎At Any Rate. So I call it the F'S I must be aware of. Also I thought about your book and title... nice. I was watching the movie Love & Monsters an in it written on one Bus it says " get your own damn bus ". 😁 I've been grateful for you for some years now. Thanks so much. You have grown immensely in the past years you are truly an inspiration. Great timing for real. Indeed needed that now. Love me some Julia...just as I believe all Shifters do. 20 Sec thoughtful friend hug trusting you will continue to bless us.
I get triggered at work with the IT suite where i teach continuing to have issues and students coming in and not being able to use the equipment. I get stressed and angry. I need it sorted but i am annoyed and frustrated that there are repeated problems and i dont think im being listened to.
Great video Julia. You are like an Angelic GOD shot. I highly appreciated your informative teachings once again. Being the fact I have PTSD, OCD, ADHD...plus powerful Addiction wars and been through highly stressful situations and my cortisol levels shoot high doses from my amygdala to my hippocampus and vice versa...it does get difficult for me at times, especially when talked to in an I'll fashion. In Malcolm Godwin's 101 ways of seeing yourself it's spoken of that there are fight flight freeze food and sex
Lately I’ve been getting triggered quite often. It usually only happened once in awhile. In the in the past 2 months I’ve been hit about 4 times and its really frustrating because I’m in this dark place for days to weeks following the event. I wasnt sure if there was anything I could even do about it. I thought I wad losing control of my mind. I want to recognize the onset and get in front of it before it sends me spiraling into a Bull in a China shop.
Am new here. My special needs son is my trigger. He likes to fight with staff (not physical). He says he going to run away from staff. My son is 32 years old and have 24 hour caregiver. He's always trying to complan to other staff so. He makes them mad at each other. I have talked his psychologist about the problem. She tells me not to take it personal and remember he's special needs. My husband sides with my son and I have to deal with him too.
Sometimes I think I get more reactive when I've been suppressing my emotions for too long. Paying attention to what's going on with me is the last thing that I want to do when emotional triggers are activated! Yes, self isolation is much easier than dealing with people when you have CPSD. So how do you do you change your perspective when you're in fight, flight or freeze mode?
Is it okay if I take your therapy everyday for life? Because Im autistic and advice doesn't last the next day. I take it 5-10 times a day and it works. I usually take it for my discouragement with Art. Possible to do a video on comparing to others and what to do when I feel discouraged by comparing to others thinking I can't do what they can do?
What if you don't know if the thoughts are true or not? 😨 Example: Am I unlovable? I don't know! Obviously I feel this way because I believe it's true!
Thank you this was really helpful 🤍 it helped evaluate a really triggering event between a close friend of mine whom I might have hurt in addressing the event if I didn’t watch your video 🥺 thank you a lot 🤍🤍
Perfect timing hi I'm new to this channel, I need severe help 🆘 some days ok others severely bad. However I don't freeze I fight! I have alot of severe mental issues plus Pstd. I have no friends no family or doctors, phycologist, crisis units, psycatrists can't help me. Medication doesn't work, others don't care I suffer alone in darkness no light me alone in dangerous thoughts! I've told several docs I plan on doing destruction to whatever they blow me off! When it happens I know they will shit! Oh she was serious? Umm yes! Not messing around! Do you know of a number that I can call other than warmline or mental hotlines. Pls reply
My trigger is trying to help my dad and he loves me but he's very independent and doesn't want my help so I leave and just cry I'm 50 hes 80 and he's not doing okay
Really helpful .. I need this in my life to make myself better.. buying your book to learn more. Thanks for your videos .. this one came to me right on time to help me .
Black and white thinking, says the lady sharing her thoughts in black and white. Okay, Julia... Just kidding, Have you ever heard the song Binary by Assemblage 23? It's about black and white, all or nothing, duality, dichotomous thinking