Two Ways to Injure a Narcissist: Narcissistic (overt) vs. Self-efficacy (covert) Injury 

I used to think I was a target and victim of these energy vampires. Now I realize I am their usher into the gates of Hades; so it's my job to learn everything about them until their time is due.

Thank you Sam! I now understand where the drama and crises are coming from😂. This piece of information will now help me not feed the drama and crises, but instead remain calm, collected and boring for the next two decades until my children grow up😅. Thank you for your service, for bringing a little bit more order to the chaos, and thereby more good that eventually trickles down😊

No need for revenge! I am better than that. I honestly feel pity because every time I observed all their defence mechanisms through tactics and covert manipulations I just felt their complete helplessness faced with authentic communication and honesty. It's indeed painful to observe after cooling off. Once you get it, you cannot unsee the pattern anymore. The shame is, that narcissists rarely seek for help. In Germany we are so far behind on that topic...without speaking english all you get is very surface level information :-( I binge watched your videos as well as those from Richard Grannons and Dr. Ramani every time some kind of god was testing me if I need one more narcissist encounter to learn my lesson to not beeing pulled in and triggered 😅 Congrats to your excellent work and beeing a role model for painful self-awareness! It's not easy at all to face traumatic experiences. Would you consider get your videos translated into german? Please 😂

You are an amazing analyst of these crazy mental issues! Thank you

Thank you so much for this insight, especially around breaking down the framework between narcissistic injury and self-efficacy injury of a covert narcissist. The idea of being good inside but being bad outside, they do fully predict failure, drama, and abandonment. Using crisis and drama and those around them as a tool for a distraction and manipulating those around you to ultimately mask and AVOID the emptiness, extreme loneliness, and dysphoria they feel with life makes me feel very saddened for them. These are truly sick people. Causing psychological, and emotional damage and scarring of others to avoid the reality of their feelings of weight of them is truly sad.

I don't wish to mortifying anyone. I want a warm loving connection with someone who is capable of love. I don't want someone to do emotional gymnastics trying to please me. I know narcissism is a natural developmental condition resistant to any effort from me to change things. I'm hitting my most vulnerable self states against an immutable immovable object who can not see me as a separate human being. There are only walls of psychological defences to continually frustrate me best efforts to be sincere and loving. All he has are manipulations and rigid idealistic myths about life in his head. I don't hate him I mourn the abject negation of my love.

😂😂😂😂After 24 yrs i want to join the smart way for the narc.You are funny .Thank you Sir for your great knowledge❤.

When I realized what was really going on, I exposed a malignant narcissist to his entire friend group - his "audience" plus the two women who both thought they were his exclusive girlfriend. He screamed at me, "You ruined my reputation!!". That was the thing he was most concerned about...I blew up his facade. One of his other victims later told me he stated that the worst part of my reaction was it caused him to lose all of his friends, that he would not even miss one of the girlfriends, but he would miss all her friends. This delusional man also screamed at me that he was GOD - he really, truly thought he was invincible. The public shame really did have an impact, for a short time. He had so many people fooled, the facade blew up so now he has to find all new supply and a new audience. They know exactly what they are doing and they like it. They do not care who they destroy.

Thank you. Because of this video I realized that i am a covert narcissistic. And it explained so much of why i behave the way i do. I can finally get better help

pls pls PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DO more of this content. how to ward off the ones that are permanent in our lives

So what you're saying is, injuring a Narcissist just makes them more insufferable

This is genius- and I thank You so much Professor - even my degree in psychology didn’t stopped me to create a shared fantasy world with NPD. What You are saying about ways they use to stop depression which is life threatening - is for me till now the most important thing I could get from You - I just had a “click moment” 😂 when it comes to being God in NPD- ex partner - when he felt safe with me - he told me few times - “I think that when I die - the world will disappear- for real - world will disappear with me“ 😮 he was super serious… Thank You once again 🏆⭐️

what an insight! he deliberately created drama so he wouldnt feel depressed. Now that i have left him he has gained a lot of weight and stopped trying to date, I’m guessing he is depressed, when I was with him he was trying to date others unsuccessfully and lied about it haha

Yessssss. Just had to mortify. He was asking for it. I’m so patient and nice until I’m done. 😂😂😂😂

Sam I love your laugh 😂 cracks me up everytime 🤣

Perfect clickbait for me this morning.

I appreciate your speech and your excellent humour...i allways enjoy listening to you. Thank you!

Hahaha 2 whole ways !! Brilliant. The very nature of the narcissist is that you cannot do a thing to make them care...

My Narc was fighting for his life and even in that state he was humiliating etc etc...... One month before passing, our last conversation!

I haven't found a single way to get through to my mother yet. Not one. She will never have an epiphany. She will always blame me for what she cannot accept in herself.

I have never felt myself to be a victim. More so I am the YinYang dance partner. A perfect magnetic mirror. My mother taught me well how to endure humiliation. My pathology is as clear to me as hers. She being the CN. I am the creative, the home-maker, the entrepreneur, the educated, the hard rebel in all my life experience. Up till I met Pj. And I love her still. She held the high and financially solid career, and was extraordinary at it and retired beautifully. She bought the house, the hot tub, the f-ing nice truck, and the 2022 TT, all up in the fantasy!!!! I made it a f- ing beautiful functioning paradise. But alas, she is poster child of the covert narcissist. Thank you Professor, you frequently save my life. Thank you.

Thank you, Prof Vaknin. Another excellent video.

Love your humor

professor, in order for one to develop narcissistic disorder, would it involve genetic predisposition together with early childhood trauma? an adult narcissist, would it be like a 2 year old looking like a grown up, being in panic and distress in desperation for their perception of the inability to have their needs met, while others treat them like a grown up and think that they could reasonably expect adult thinking/ decisions or behaviors whilst they exist in response to early traumas? but these together with the grandiosity that comes with the disorder doesn't allow to see and accept their problem, so to support their false sense of superiority as a priority, a narcissist would project force and reinforce their issues to anybody or anything else to distract them and disguise their issues along the way, essentially seeking company to their world, as it is lonely and chaotic? that's a lot of questions I guess, you are the first point for me to educate myself about this. your contribution is truly appreciated, truly expert and educationally insightful. thank you thank you, thank you

Taking notes 📝 📝 📝 😃.

The introduction was hilarious 😂

What kind of healthy coping strategies could a person with NPD implement when experiencing mortification, depression, collapse etc? All info about NPD online is demonising & boring. This is the only channel with genuine info I've ever found

That was a great one!

This explains so much

As a Good Person™, I would never do this.

The intensely religious, self-deprecating, fragile, covert narcissist is in their personal glory-land while in failure. Especially in the case with those who are of christian derivation because, confession, humility and repentance are the ultimate saving graces. So, because of the narcissistic bloated ego, no one can repent and self deprecate like they do. If you are a partner of such a person, and have healthy self respect, you will be utterly despised because you are seen as in rebellion to their own self-administered program of self-deprecation, which alone is the standard of success. You are excessively flawed and can never live up to their own ability to self deprecated. You are despicable. But, quietly..... in their inner heart.... they admire you immensely. This admiration triggers their need to self deprecate, because they have secretly admired the despicable qualities which are found in their personal objects of supply. They are then compelled to lash out with ferocity upon those who are their sources of supply in an attempt to knock them down from their unlawful perches of admiration. This cycle continues and is insufferable to the partners and children of such unfortunate fragile narcissists.... 😒😒😒

😂 The way you started.

Very good. Well explained.

Only one way to hurt a narcissist move on live a happy life forget the narcissist

The intro made me laugh 😂

excellent viewpoint, not like other channels

My ex is covert. He hovered me after 6 months no contact. He was arrested almost 2 months ago for domestic violence. He had to go a night without drinking and he had bay bail. I know his attorney is going to cost a lot. I know he feels like he lost a game. A chess match. I keep wondering if I finally mortified him. Nothing else worked.

Hey Sam, would love to see you do a Carl Jung essential intro vid (it's hard as hell for me). Who else can do it? Amongst other talents, you have a gift for breaking down books and representing them (The BPD one was mint).

Prof. Vaknin, if it was a psychopathic / sociopathic malignant narcissist causing this drama would it be fair to say he would use puppets to live that drama so he could experience it vicariously over many years from the comfort of his home?

I wondered if they do suicide. Very thorough description, well explained & much appreciated👍👍

471 ways to mortify a Narcissist!! Can’t wait! 😂

Hi Sam, what do you think of the idea of a universal basic income? Do you think it's a good idea? Really hope I get an answer from you! Love your work, by the way.

I adore U Sam

That guy is Sam Vaknin .. Goosebumps.. Proffesor Sam My dream is getting an autograph from you..

What to said …This stripteases doesn’t teasing me! I find this exposure very confortable and well performed 😅 txs

Love ❤️!

So what your saying is: the covert is like an armadillo and the overt is like a dime bar?

Does public shaming include one-on-one interaction, or does there have to be a wider audience?

I just want to know if they know that they have a problem ?

Don't injure the narcissist. All your doing is choosing to degrade another human, one thats already a mess. I get the anger (there myself) but if you do this on purpose then what is the point leaving them if your going to allow yourself to become no better. Revenge isnt justice its about how you feel and we all know it.

Sam.You won't die!Nothingness is positive.

Top song regarding a narcissist creep by radio head my daughters boyfriend how to get rid ???

lol. i know, right.

Tell us

Sam's funny