Audrey is right. Love is more about feelings and emotions a person evokes rather than their looks. There comes a point in good, loving relationships where you just feel eachother's vibes and you don't really notice how the other person looks. The other person becomes perpetually beautiful to you if you love them.
@@caty2ful well yes, but nobody will deny that a fit body and not bold male has more chances to have s*x than a overweight bold man..I mean would be more enjoyable in bed, the eyes want their part too! But women forget about s*x and they are ok with a man who is financially well off and can contribute to the family (all very valuable attributes)but attractiveness is not there anymore we all know that
Let’s be honest and admit that external beauty is important to everyone. BUT it can be a short-lived phase which can easily turn unattractive by someone’s behaviour. I, for one, believe that a person’s beauty radiates from within. No matter how gorgeous he or she might be, their actions will make them more beautiful or turn them “ugly”. Whoever you choose to be your life partner for all the right reasons will always be the most beautiful human being to you.
It’s not important to me, just be a vaguely square shaped dude and be nice, lmao I still don’t fathom how humans are so shallow while claiming to not be 🤭
Every good looking western woman I’ve met seems to be trash. They all have been used and abused the. You have to deal with their bs mistakes and trauma caused by all the guys they smashed.
Let's be real, if you are sleeping too soon with someone, the love they can start developing n the compassion lens they'd use to judge you, is not there. You are just a physical body standing there with all of its flaws. The caveat to that as Jameson mentioned is, everyone is ready to be fooled by your uniqueness but only if you believe in it, yourself. No one can tear you down unless you let them. So even if your body is not perfect, you have to find the self love in you to remember you are not just a physical body to be reduced to, you are an entire package to be discovered 📦 😉💛
As a curvy girl I've worked on my self for years: worth, development, loving my skin...I can tell you that confidence is everything! Own that shit, be grateful for your body 🙏🏼 and sexiness will ooze out of you. And just because someone is good looking doesn't automatically make them good in bed anyway 😅 It's LOA...what you believe about yourself and put out to others is what you'll receive
Here’s the rub: if they participate in porn or mention not liking your features or compare you to others. It’s not you, it’s them, they won’t be satisfied with reality, move on, they’re the problem 😊 find someone that is attracted to you as your unique self, not a set of features
Worse is those guys who watch, claim they put no value on it or what they see, say all the “right things” to give the impression they’re reasonable, and then judge you and your appearance secretly but will never say it bc they’re coward and not honest about what they really think. You’ll *never* know these men bc they don’t speak about your appearance or make the comments. Covert narcissist.
For me, what makes a person beautiful physically is precisely everything that makes them unique. Their own particular shape, skintone, the scars they have, the myriads of ways their sensuality shines through in the way they move or do something, the tone of their voice etc etc...
I 100% agree with Audrey. If you sleep with someone solely based on their looks ... the relationship or sex will never actually be that good. Maybe it will be great in the early stages of the relationship, when dopamine and hormones are running high, but in the long term you need a real connection and chemistry with someone.
I just started seeing someone a few weeks ago and we really hit it off. It's been 5 years since "the first time" with someone and I swear, it gets harder every time because I'm getting older (I've been in several long term relationships). I'm 42 and he's 51, both of us are in great athletic shape and look 10 years younger than we actually are, yet I am STILL a nervous wreck because this weekend is going to be THE weekend. It's like you guys said in the video and in chat, you have to own it and have self pride. There's beauty and power in that. And try not to be nervous because your partner is probably just as nervous as you. So just have fun, laugh, give each other confidence and radiate what you want to receive.
I get your being nervous and all, but what a lovely place to be in - where all the excitement and promise and adventure is part of your days and nights. Enjoy and have a great time! X
Of course he wants you to screw him the make him some food. Pancakes if your poor. Treat him like a king. Make him be in charge stay safe and be a human.
I am considerably older than you and still playing this game, since I am divorced. Carrie, enjoy your youth. You are STILL young, and you're 10 years younger than him. Own that!
@@SSpitz16 lol it went AWESOME. We were both nervous at first, but that was ok. The rest of the weekend was smooth sailing and we are so excited to see each other again in a few days ♡
There it is. The key word. "Chemistry" ...and it doesn't necessarily primarily means sexual attraction. To me "chemistry" is a constant hunger and interest in learning more about the other person, wanting more of the communication and this personal contact and presence Even in silence. In fact silence in presence of the other person tells me volumes about the connection between us.
@@terrylasin3709 if they have a beautiful heart and soul, it makes them more beautiful to me. If they have an ugly heart and soul and they’re not a nice person, I no longer see them as attractive
My body is far from what the media would consider perfect but I've always been confident about it. I don't know where the confidence comes from but I found that I've always been more body confident than some of the guys I've been with. When I started getting intimate with my current partner, he'd joke about his "dad bod". I think he's handsome. He says he thinks I'm beautiful. I think when you're in love with someone, your bodies can look any type of way and you'll still be attracted to one another.
@@coolbreeze5683 I can relate with my current partner also joking about his "dad bod". One time he forcibly pushed out his stomach, so I pushed out my already bloated stomach and said "I still think we look great". A quote from Euphoria that stuck with me, is 90% of life is about confidence, and the thing about confidence, is that no one can tell when you're faking it!
@@annaseimova576 that goes along with what Matthew says in the video. Confidence contributes to a lot. If you believe what you're offering is high quality then others believe it to.
Thank you for your voice Audrey. Your point about our looks not defining whether we are worthy of a relationship really resonated. Glad you are part of these videos.
If he's making unhelpful comments about your naked body, why are you naked with this bloke? If you're making unhelpful comments about your naked body, why are you naked with this bloke? I'm pretty certain they've already figured out what my body looks like under the clothes by the time we've gotten to the bedroom naked
Kitty 🐈 is the same anywhere. As long as it's hot and wet you are at the top of your game. Yes his hands aren't down your pants because you vote similar to him.
When I'm in love, I'm in love also with the little things that are not perfect about my man's body. I even see them as a plus. I cannot split a person into "areas": body, mind, voice... it's a whole lovable person.
My mom always told me, pretty is…”is” pretty does! You can be pretty but what you do is what matters. That could be showing kindness, empathy or being honest.
After coming out of a 30 year marriage, my self-esteem was so low that I never thought I could ever be found to be attractive. I have really found since then, that self confidence is apparently very attractive. 😅 All those years I wasted feeling bad about how I looked!
Sorry, but it’s my experience with men that they don’t care a whole lot about a woman’s body as long as they can get some! 😊. Their focus is on the act itself and not so much what’s under them. One track mind. And, it’s the way you make them feel about themselves that makes YOU sexy!
Think they are all right, that you go with the person that you have that chemistry with, makes you laugh, etc and you dont want to point out the bad things in you and just be yourself!
It's true that you should be careful about talking too much about your insecurities. My bf and I are the same height, and while I'm a bit tall for a woman, my bf feels like he's "too short" for a man lol. I used to see him as perfection of a man's body, because he's athletic plus he has beautiful facial features. But listening to comments about how he's not "tall enough" for more than 2 years now penetrated my brain and I indeed sometimes "accidentally" compare him to other men and I do realize that probably he *is* shorter than the "beauty standart" and for a minute I see him less attractive for that. But then I hate myself for those thoughts, because it is not my real perception nor *my* real taste in men.
Yeah thats selfsabotage. He is projecting his own percieved shortcoming and now its drilled a way into your perception. If this keeps going you are going to start losing attraction
When seeding dought. You need reclaimed sex. This shows you who is in command, even if you fantasize Capt Jack is short. But his lust over you is commanding. Make him pancakes if your poor. Treat him like the king he is. Let his love drip from your lips. Either end.
Stupid of him to focus on not being taller than you. Instead of seeing it as an advantage. He is the perfect size for you: against the wall with a taller guy is more complicated!
I'm tall for a woman (1,76m) and have always had partners same height as me or smaller than me. One of them felt insecure because he was 1,65 m. I always tried to "sell "him it was easier for kissing my breast and some other positions 😂. I understand it's not easy for you. But the fact that I didn't really care helped him to be less sensitive even if he didn't change his mind on the fact he should be taller as a man. We are still full of stereotypes and have to work on ourselves to get rid of them. Best wishes for both of you!
I appreciated Audrey's comments about who we end up with and how it goes beyond physical beauty. I was a little disappointed in the men here for talking so much about selling yourself as sexually attractive, rather than talking about, for example, how a man should be able to move beyond that a bit to appreciate all the wonderful (potentially) qualities of his partner. Their response felt shallow - unlike so many of your other conversations! I enjoy this wonderful podcast!!
I agree, some of what the men said does push the narrative that all men care so much about conventional physical attractiveness. Many men do but there are also many who are capable of looking past the physical or falling in love with however their partner looks over time. I'm married to one of those guys and yes they do exist.
Yes i believe in not drawing attention to the parts of your body you would love to change..So just love yourself own your body tell yourself, you are fabulous.Then it flows like a river and just enjoy the moment..If your date or partner compliments you actually accept it acknowledge it with confidence..Thank you again Mr Hussey for a great video. .
@dianneciresi7208 Discernment is a beautiful gift so let us use it women will know and feel when the right person is there with them mentally and emotionally even before the intimacy begins.
Also agree with Audrey PLUS There’s a world of us who are overweight, who can’t/don’t work out, who are ill, handicapped, have had mastectomies etc& hey/we are just as lovable, sexual as the models Real love transcends the superficial. I know cause I was fortunate enough to be loved really loved by my husband for 45 years (and a couple of others too.!) Thank G-d ➡️Sexuality is an inside job and most of the time people don’t feel confident or great about the way we look Part of love IS embracing body mind soul, warts and all!❤
Absolutely brilliant articulation of identity and personhood showing up strong inside of vulnerability Matt! You bring so much covering of vulnerability within the thought as well. Awesome! I love it when you support each other’s thoughts and sharing… This was a very wonderful description of exuding confidence through what we believe about ourselves. 💫💫💫
Think about this truth: We already are beautiful! We don't have to live up to these expectations of beauty. We already were and are beautiful just the way we are 😍
I own my body. We're a testimony to our resilience Last kiddo resulted in physical abdominal wall injury that still affects my physical health and body shape. Yeah, the flesh apron is annoying BUT this is a body that has worked, and lived, and loved before he showed up. And, if he doesn't like it, he needs to be shown the door Abdominoplasty, AKA the tummy tuck, is reconstructive surgery and NOT cosmetic surgery. Never was, never will be!
This was a nice podcast session. From what I took away in this conversation is that no matter what your looks are (body type, size, and shape) is that having a deep connection and chemistry with the S/O is what makes you love them. As far as sex goes, I believe with what Adurey pointed out to that as long as you have the chemistry and connection, then men aren't judging you on your looks. They are just happy to have sex with you in that moment.
What i would like to know is why men are exempt from bringing to the table? It appears to there is so much emphasis on what a man wants from a woman but no looking at themselves as if sex is for them only. Why is that?
I used to think like that but I've been noticing a lot of guys are self conscious about their own physical appearance. Just yesterday I went on a date and huged him and he said I should mind his "fat rolls" or something like that. He's tall and strong and I'm crazy attracted to him. It was shocking to hear he was concerned about that.
As a woman, I have been disappointed with a man's package more than once. Sorry, but the sex is not as good & it's disappointing when the man cannot do certain positions when he is really small. At least a guy has some idea of what the female may be like with her clothes off. We ladies don't know anything till the guys clothes are off all the way.
I have been with people that are big and small. It matters how they use it. For me the guy that was small was more enjoyable. The guys that were big were horrible.
The other day I looked back over the people I was with before I met my husband. Despite the fact that I was only rarely slim and do not have a hard body type - I always had a belly and an inch or more to pinch - there was not a single one among them who looked at me as if they were judging me. They all loved being with me. This was a healing thought for me.... There is more to the human act of love-making than the human body.
I am 51 years old. Had 3 kids and etc.. No man should expect me to be a super model. I have some good parts still. I know this. And if a man doesn’t like what I have…they are welcome to take a walk.
I'm always nervous when it comes to the point that we going to the bed together fear of the same feeling I had before with my ex. I have been struggling and stressed out every time I meet a guy. Even I knew they look sexy and lovely but I don't think I had that wow moment. Simply bec I believe that I met the wrong one!!
No over thinking, were talking about guys response. There's no secret it's about reclaimed sex after your partner flirts with another. Be lewd while having sex, think of Capt Jack and be his giving Amber.
The hardest medicine later in life is finding an old wrinkly person in the mirror, and no one to love or care about in old age. It arrives too fast. When what you've really got left is wisdom to impart to youth, but who dont value us .. because older people just appear expiry dated and dispensable somehow ?
Hey Matthew , hello friends with Matthew I don't know your names (sorry for that ) greetings from Morocco , u can't imagine how your efforts guys are SO USEFUL AND PRECISE TO THE POINT , I think that it's all about mastering our bodies _ as females _ because the main fundamental point of the feminine energy is taking care of her children , looking after her bro , calling her dad , wondering whether her friend is okay or not cs he or she was absent during the class session , so BASICALLY, our taking care approach is centric to many many many actions , thoughts , beliefs and so life choices, this is why I BADLY know that if she is capable enough to just be calm , easygoing , soft and positive with her bully , feet , hands , tongue or whatever , THIS WILL EXTREMELY ADD SOME SORT OF spiritual bond with her significant other ! this is my intuition, as a non-analytic person ( u can say a non-judgemental person ) I always respect my intuitions and sensations of life in general THAAAAAAAAAAAANKS AGAIN , LOVE YOU ALL TO THE MOON AND BACK 😘
I recently asked this on a previous message and thought I’d ask it again here and would really appreciate your feedback. If you’re someone who truly suffers severely with Body Dysmorphic Disorder, do you think it is a good idea to actually try and date? I understand all of your points made and logically they make perfect sense, but when you’re someone who’s mental health can be triggered to the point where you are scared of yourself, is it wise to put yourself in situations that could exacerbate it and as a result potentially do more harm then good? Ideally you want to make those emotional and physical connections, in fact you crave that feeling of belonging with someone, that you hope can allow you to feel safe enough to share all sides of yourself. The struggle is that in order to do that you have to face some really dark demons and ultimately, is it worth it? As more than likely, many people may not be able to deal with what you experience and therefore the rejection could make you worse! Very aware that you have to work on yourself and seek profession help with such a condition, but is it wise to date whilst doing this? Your opinions on this would be greatly appreciated. Many thanks 🥰
The only person who can reject you is you. When it comes to anxiety and facing inner demons. Do not run from them, life is short. What do you think about dating without the physical aspect? Might be a great place to start and build from there
I'm 50 in 12 days im.taking care of myself very well if you like someone lot you wouldn't think about how he or she looks about clothing. You love the heart of the person and the personality body is secondary. Getting along helps with things too
That longer than I last, we will have to work repeatedly on that response time. Try, try again until you succeed. Try roleplay or get fantasy 😇😈 going.
The title of this talk is misleading and didn't quite take a deeper dive. Much of it was about building self esteem and confidence. The men didn't make much sense to me. Audrey kept it simple.
M Carrick is right. From what I´ve heard from a lot of men: being overweight is highly preferred. There are plenty of men who do not find thin women sexually attractive. Who cares about the rolls if you have the booty!
I recently met a guy who complimented me on my body & shape, this took me aback because I’m 62, I’ve had 3 children and my weight has gone up and down between a size 8-18 over the years, so it’s no way toned and everything has gone south. At 1st I thought he was just saying that to get sex lol, but then I thought hang on a moment, if he wants sex with me then my body must have turned him on regardless, but what he really liked most was my laughter, my smile and my kindness & all that takes more precedence than my flabby mid drift or that my breasts have gone south 😊
My wife was 200 lbs on our blind date. Five years and two kids later, she lost 55 lbs and has been hit on by guys for years. Don't place so much emphasis on characteristics that will only fade over time.
Hello Audrey, sweet girl. I do think men can see the woman the way you asked in your question when it is a true real love they have for the woman. I do believe it is possible, that the person and the moment you are in then are all that counts and the past isn't important anymore.
Hi Matt, sorry off topic, I have a question....I've been in a long term relationship, it's kind of had a rough trot past 2 yrs......just wandering...... ' what questions should I ask myself wether I should stay or go from the marriage?' 🧚♀️thankyou
I had a great loud laughter when Matt says 1st watch why he's gone,video and then enjoy your baby bear videos in Florida other shows of huge crocodiles beans or not women at the fast-food stand drive-thru... Oh my gosh handsome smart and funny
Leaving another comment as I'm revisiting this video. I would love and appreciate feedback/opinions please? I have skin picking scars over the top half of my body (chest/arms) from self harm. I've had loads of therapy but that doesn't erase the scars and the spots plus I'm a large lady... I'm very worried my body is a huge turn off... I feel monstrous... my body is so ugly... are there really guys out there who aren't to be horrified or concerned...?? 😢😢😢
Thank you for this because many women are walking around trying to look sluttier than the other and copying Mikey cyrus. And I'm over here trying to survive and feeling insecure about my body. I have confidence in my youthful face but I'm at a stage in my life where I can't take care of everything so it's hard and I get angry because it there's nothing for us women why are there not men showing off more? Such a unfair world
You might find this research interesting. Basically what it's saying is that the LESS attractive people have more meaningful relationships BECAUSE appearance isn't as important in choosing a mate - so they choose on more important reasons. ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-BzG0_aU_Fn0.html
The reality in the USA is we have "Thin" and "Pretty Privilege" to contend with....The more handsome or pretty a person is, they will have far more dating opportunities.
He actually said, hes willing to work with a women who doesnt have the best personality and thinks he can help change her. Hes just focused on being with a beautiful women. And yet craves real love as well. Im confused...
Living in denial. If helping somebody to change is a motivator your setting yourself for failure every time and its also unhealthy for both parties. Having to 'help' somebody implies they are damaged/unfinished and not good as they are now and it creates an imagine of how he thinks she should be instead of wondering who she wants to be.
I have been in a long distance relationship since 6 months now and we have only seen each other 2 times when i went to meet her. We chilled, took scooty rides etc but haven't been intimate. I want to but she disregards it with some reason or the other. I am pretty confused right now. I get really annoyed at this. What to do? Please help me.
So is Matthew saying that guys do fantasize and think about other girls they've been with when there was somebody else even if they have good chemistry or they have or they're like oh I had better chemistry the last person are they completely comparing other women to the person they're actually currently sleeping with I can tell her guys do all the time at least my ex doesn't he was thinking about me sometimes when I was dating him
what happens while intimate with your partner can make all the difference in a relationship. Not everyone one can set the drapes on fire while intimate. Not everyone is in touch with their sexual responses physically, emotionally. If a man is just looking to have something happen that may be sort of sexual….you’re not experiencing sex that’ll set the drapes on fire. You have NO CLUE what sex is really meant to be. If you’re with someone who looks for body type first, I can tell ur not not completely connecting with the other person on every level humanly possible. Real sex with a partner is f’en amazing, a deep connection changes all of oh I have to have a person who is a model to get an erection. Lol. That’s truly sad. I won’t even put myself in that space. Cuz you wont be able to be on my same playing field. I’m not a model but I most likely I experience things differently. A person who is in touch with themselves physically, emotionally, sexually. I’ve had one fella after me for a few years. For many reasons I said no bye bye….I expect full attention in the bedroom, and I have to have that for u also. Recently we’ve spent time talking and we both agreed let’s spend more time together …..we’ll see….the rest to be continued . . . But I don’t give of myself fully unless you do, one primary reason I say bye bye….take care
