What is Self-Esteem? | Eckhart Tolle Teachings 

You identify as an enlightened person? ;)

Beautifully said

Amen we are much much more than 3D ideas or labels.We come from a source more perfect than we can imagine 🙏

Well said. I've always thought I needed high self esteem. But the better goal is to achieve no self esteem. "No self" as Buddhism teaches. Loving myself requires two separate selves like Tolle explains. That just adds unnecessary complexity and thus more thought and more ego. No need for that. I simply am. The bird or flower doesn't need to love itself. It just is.

Exactly as I saw it too

Wise words brother ❤️

The only thing that is appearing to stop you from enlightenment/self-realization/eternal life/knowing yourself to be unconditional love is identification with thoughts, emotions, sensations, perceptions and experiences instead of being aware of being aware and knowing yourself to be that unconditional love pure consciousness in which all thoughts, emotions, sensations, perceptions and experiences appear but are not inherently one with you; they are an expression of unconditional love; you are that infinite that is expressing itself as suffering/pleasure but inherently you are neither; you are that nothing/unconditional love/pure consciousness in which they are appear and by which they are perceived; Suffering/pleasure comes and goes; there is an awareness that is aware of them coming and going; that you are; remember and know what you are; never identify with anything that is appearing within you; since it appears within you; it can't be you; you are that in which it appears. When you abide as that in which it appears instead of identifying; nothing has a grip on you; if anything comes; it quickly goes; like clouds passing; only if you identify as a cloud then it will appear as if the cloud is here for longer than it is originally supposed to; if you simply rest as the awareness and do not identify; it will quickly dissolve; be unconditional love by being aware of being aware; this is the highest; this is what you are seeking in absolutely everything else; you are seeking yourself; you are seeking unconditional love; but you are looking outside of yourself; instead of being aware that you already are unconditional love. Love love

How can I gain more self-esteem...what do I need to do? I am going through a break up and a loss of my daughter and beating myself up to the point where I have lost a part of myself

@@YaTut169 that is well stated

@@livenow13 maybe you can try to express all your feelings and emotions with acceptance, maybe through sounds, and realeasing any judgements or denials about the situation and how you feel and what you think

How, and how long did it take you?

@@liamc7097 Well, a long story made short would be; In June of 2019 I was "trying one last time", starting a new life back where I grew up. No real hope since I'd "restarted my life" several times before at that point. (57 years of life). But I got lucky when I found a therapy package called Overcoming Social Anxiety Disorder: Step by Step by Dr. Thomas A. Richards. Maybe I didn't have Social Anxiety Disorder but I sure did have ANTs (Automatic Negative Thoughts (and emotions)). I learned how to slow my mind down, how to identify, and eventually stop, ANTs. And let go of my negative past. Maybe 4 months into that I learned about Eckhart Tolle and his teachings. I found his book The Power of Now. I can't say, because I don't recall, when exactly I WOKE UP and realized THIS IS IT, but I would say I was listening to Eckhart's teachings for at least five months. And it was only ever a whole lot of useless 'concepts' before that. Like Robin Williams' quote, "Reality, what a concept". So long as you're getting your identity from your mind, your life will remain a concept. A kind of dream. Usually not a good dream. lol. PS; Having learned about good health, The Proper Human Diet, probably helped a lot. Mark Sisson, Dr. Ken Berry, Dr. Sten Ekberg and others. Good luck! I wish you good health and eternal peace. ;)

@@EnlightenedCarnivore hi John, I'm glad you've gone through this change! I'm glad that you're feeling better. Happy for you man. I find myself in a situation where low self-esteem is plaguing my existence. There are quite strong negative thoughts that pop up for me. Stuff like "there's something wrong with you", "you don't add any value to anyone's life" etc. At times I feel like it's hard to disassociate from the thoughts. I don't wanna live like this anymore as well. Really just don't want to care about the thoughts. But I'm not quite sure how to gain power over them

@@theChannel40 ​ Hey, Amigo..Thanks for your reply. Wow, I wrote that comment 6 months ago and, guess what,...life has become better and better since then. And in ways I could never have imagined. So no worries, there will come a time you'll be glad you've suffered because it was your ticket out of "normal" existance. I didn't mention it in that comment but, I never would have understood any of Eckhart's teachings if it wasn't for having 80% of the garbage removed from my mind first when I went through 14 months of CBT (Cognitave Behavioral Therapy) by way of this guy, Dr. Thomas A. Richards, Overcoming Social Anxiety, step by Step. A series of 20 audio cassettes. I think the best way to explain it is that this guy's teachings provided the foundation for me to begin to understand pretty much everything I've learned afterwards (and during, since the therapy starts working almost right away). It teaches you how to disassociate yourself from those negative thoughts. (ANTs, Automatic Negative Thoughts), release yourself from negativity from the past, live in the present moment. All sorts of good stuff. Check it out, you'll love it! I could throw some other names your way, other people who have helped, but I'm thinking start from there and see what happens. ;)

@@EnlightenedCarnivore @John Vreden Hey man, good to hear from you! This gives me hope! I'm actually training to be a therapist so definitely should be looking into CBT as it's probably something I'll be working with. You mentioned audio cassettes, do you mean audio book? I can only seem to find the book. From my experience so far, there's always an opportunity for growth when going through hardships. I might not see it now, but I have to trust that there is light on the other side of the tunnel

No

Well said!

Its got to be divine intervention. Its flawless. ♥️🙏

He speaks from Being, the Truth.

Yeah😭

Eckhart is a gift to humanity. I truly love this man.

I feel like I don't know my true self I feel lost. What can I do to find my true self?

@@karenmartinez8781 Follow Eckharts’ Teaching to the letter, through understanding and practice you will find your essence, Being

@@herzcompass1293 thank you but what are the few things?

@@karenmartinez8781 The best part is that you don't "need" to find your true self. What I've learned from Eckhart's teachings is that the minute you try to seek something out, you are looking for form. Your true self is not form or anything that can be conceptualized, but right within you. Your Being is who you are, whenever you go deeper into yourself you will discover you have been you all along. It's as simple as that, don't let the ego overcomplicate it. Hope this helped :) This is just my opinion of course

I almost daily ask myself who I really am...🤔

Brilliant

Yes! This is one of my struggles! I could never conciliate this two. I now see they are both ego. Thank you for sharing.🙏

Will you plz mention the page?

@@humancumalienhumancumalien3947 page 109 - chapter "giving up role playing" :)

@@Rita-sp7hh thank you. "In form, you are and will always be inferior to some, superior to others. In essence, you are neither inferior or superior to any one. True self-esteem and true humility arise out of that realization. In the eyes of the ego, self esteem and humility are contradictory. In truth, they are one and the same". Last two lines of page 109 concluding the topic, if are read in isolation from previous four lines same may create ambiguity about the crux of the thought shared by Eckhart. If all six lines are read together, no room is left for any ambiguities.

I have just received that book from Amazon and can't wait to read it!

@@angiemcdonald4248 Its an amazing book .. Have a nice time reading it

Thank you Hayder.

Have you read The New Earth yet? If not, you are going to love it.

@@xoxo00009 I'm going to read it soon , Its the next book in my list .. Thanks

Tolle is saying though that the ultimate goal is to go beyond self love and self esteem. Having high self esteem or "self love" indicates the ego is still creating a story about you, but this time the story is seemingly more favorable. In reality, I don't have a life. I am life. I do not have a "self." I do not love "myself." I am love. The bird or flower does not love itself or hate itself. It just is. That's good enough. That's where we need to move toward. No self.

sofia goudaropoulou, Even better is to be rid of THAT "self" altogether. ;)

Thank you, E K.

Now you don't need to read any of them. 🙂

You're welcome

@@herzcompass1293 Many thanks for your reply, much appreciated. I fully agree with your representation of some earthly manifestations such as emotions, bodies, thoughts, etc. However, we're only talking about „self-esteem“, which is - in my humble understanding - created by the ego. My view - there are no other words to say it earthly - is NOT a completely different level of being as you stated. It’s God or pure consciousness from where all forms get manifested. That is it.

You Are😊

No no no, YOU are ^^

Still is

@@connieanderson2281 Really? I can't find it

Couldn’t agree more!!

What I got from it: if you entertain 'self love' you will unwillingly also entertain 'self hate' because that is how the ego operates, it compares you to others to attain it's 'level'. But he did say that by not entertaining either, you stop feeding the ego (the source of all suffering) and attain true balance, by fully accepting yourself there is no need for self esteem/ego as you are comfortable in your own body.

Maybe that answer will come when your ego disappears. Without ego, love and acceptance is all there is.

@@catiarodrigues8492 hm…so by your logic, if love and acceptance is all that’s left, I could apply some of that towards all of myself, no? And I’m still fitting within what you outlined? I’m going to elaborate on what I mean in my reply below…

@@Storm_. thanks for your reply! While I understand that idea, it still feels like, for the majority of people in our society, this approach is skipping an essential step. I feel this way about zen spirituality, too, which Tolle seems to align with in his views. The approach looks great on paper, but in reality, I feel the following is true: In order to *let something go*, you must first *hold it.* understand it fully, grasp it. Only then can you truly release it. Because let’s be honest, most of us have a disordered relationship with ourselves as a result of our ego (which is often worsened by past pain & unprocessed childhood trauma, among other factors.) That’s why we’re looking for a solution, a way to get out of the state of sadness or suffering, right? Generally, we know the ego’s main goal is to protect us, but it often goes overboard, reminding us that if we try anything new or different, there’s an inherent risk, and we “could die.” That’s the core fear, deep down. So there’s a use of fear (the opposite force to love) by the ego to keep us still, inert. It leads to stagnation, prevents us from doing anything that might mean the loss of acceptance by society, our friends, our family, the media, our culture, etc. All those opinions contribute to what the ego tells us we “must do to survive.” And it fiercely defends this. So I’m wondering, how does one go from a lifetime of the feelings of self-loathing, self-criticism, or self-suppression by the ego…to suddenly saying one day, “you know what? The ego doesn’t exist. So I’m done with all that.” Really? 🧐 I’m sorry, but I think that is easy to write, FAR more difficult to execute, and not all of us have the kind of stark awakening that Tolle did. I’m not saying it’s impossible. But I agree with the last commenter. We live in a conscious, physical world. While we have a subconscious and unconscious aspect, the physical experience needs to be addressed. And to be present means that, from time to time, the ego will crop up. Are we really saying that we’ll hear it in our mind & simply say “you don’t exist” every time, in hopes it just…goes away and never comes back again? I’m suggesting the balance of first acknowledging the ego, and beginning by saying “thank you for trying to protect me. I know you mean well. But you’re coming from a place of fear/lack, assuming the worst, basing all your thoughts only on previously collected data, and we’re going to be okay if I do this thing you’re telling me not to do.” This, to me, (combined with a daily meditation practice, aka practicing Tolle’s suggested presence) has been a far more practical approach to getting a handle on my own perfectionist, over-critical ego. And the more I acknowledge its good intentions while still doing what my heart/intuition tells me, the quieter the inner voice gets over time. This is especially helpful in times of emotional distress, when the inner voice can be the cruelest. Pretending it’s not there isn’t helpful, because the emotions are sometimes overwhelming. And saying “I shouldn’t feel this way” or invalidating the experience in the moment by saying it’s only a result of my “made-up ego” hasn’t ever gotten me to feel peace. Being kind to myself has helped tremendously, which could be seen as treating myself like I would a friend, or self-accepting, or loving my self. All of these are somewhat synonymous, and none of them are about self-comparison. And if the ego does go away fully someday, I won’t be upset! 😁 But I don’t see how self-acceptance would force it to remain. That’s been my path to seeing my authentic self (beyond the confines of the mind/ego/pain body), and on a deeper level, with this approach, I find I’m slowly reconnecting with my soul. If you got this far, thanks for reading & considering! ☺️🤍

are you beating yrsel up or building yrself up?(louise Hay made this quote) As eckhardt was telling, are you yr worst frien or yr best friend(when you are suffering just imagine what a good friend would tell you and write down the words. the words you are telling yrself create the image you have(self esteem) if you enjoy beating yourself up you are having yr worst friend living with you inside yr head and you should throw him out. I do believe that we are attracting what we are thinking about ourselves and the unworthyness is attracting these experiences so it is time to change the beliefs(the story) to attract better experiences(we are only here to experience situations to make us grow and evolve and life is only a play like a hollywood movie, but we take it for real. Entering our higher stat of awareness(not the ego which is only a made up character for yr movie but not yr real self that is always there and doesn't change, this is the goal and why we need to suffer to leave the movie which we take for real)

Except on the present moment thing which i still do not understand about Sadhguru's viewpoint🤔

@@xoxo00009 they do agree on the present moment thing. Sadhguru just doesn’t like the common misinterpretation of Eckhart’s teachings, that the mind is the enemy. They agree that life is in presence and that the mind should be used as a tool.