When Not To Use The No Contact Rule 

Lol hahajaja

Hahahahaha

Lmao 😂

@@elainehoward1569 are you also the one who is heartbroken and joined this club with big LMAO? 😂

any day!

Yeah??? Well if yours has never been broken, you've never risked anything. OK, but kind of dull.

So sad

That's what's up 😢

Very true comment but had my heartbroken so many times now,got used to it now and it does not hurt as much as you get older lol,stay safe and well.

@@mummyd1990 how are things going for u now? I’m on my 3rd week too and i’m not myself

FishtailRogue uhh bcuz you broke up with me hahah

FishtailRogue facts 🙏

Sane...

@@aalyaaa04 go out with me, or Ill put you in no contact

😭😭

I needed that! Thanks

So how long to respond to the ex if he did the dumping and was texting me the next day?

@@salibacchus7197 Hi sali. They did the dumping so they're the one who should *reach out* ... basically No contact means not reaching out, not ignoring them . That would be childish so I'd say go ahead and reply to them some time during the day.

This is the perfect time to stay busy and hang with friends! It feel like the last thing you want to do but let them know your hurting and just need to stay distracted. Go be productive and be around people. This is the time to refind yourself and be a better you! Itll be crazy hard but make you so much stronger!

That's exactly what hurts me the most.. thinking about how he some day may end up with someone else hurts the most:(

not me idc ew that makes me more sure to move on I never share

Sorry you're going through that. It will get better. I promise.

@@brandonbertram6836 Agreed! Immediately took up "hiking" and walking. Lost 25 pounds. It's been a great outlet. (bonus: she tried to get me hiking our entire relationship, and she is noticing my on line profile pics.)

Except if they dumped you because you cheated or abused them.

@@gutsandgrittv5076 true. If you deserved to get dumped cause you’re a cheating or abusive scumbag then you don’t deserve them back and will hopefully never hear from them again 💯

What if you weren’t really present the last couple months in the relationship? Like I had so many things on my mind from work. I just wasn’t giving her the time of the day. But then again if she a real woman she would of known it and supported me through the hard time. Instead she just left

@@AlexMartinez-jx4ff my ex left me because just like your ex, I was asking him for more time and effort and he carried on with work. I’m sorry it happened to you but I think she did well and it’s something I should have done too. It’s like men always want 100% compassion without giving much effort back. Everyone is busy but somehow for some people it’s really not that hard to give some more love when asked.

Your ex is never going to develop a "scour the earth" feeling to get back with you. Whenever an ex reaches out it's casual because it's an attempt or a chance to rebuild chemistry and attraction, if someone dumped you it's because the chemistry and the physical/emotional attraction is gone, and they're not coming back from no contact. No contact works by making your ex miss the chemistry and attraction and wish that they could rebuild it. Hence why you start off casual and escalate at a healthy pace before you're both ready to make it official.

Great for you!

@@micallll100 thankyou. I do have my moments still. I still cry...rejection is so difficult😢

@@melwill9868 I know...it sucks...

@Sika L Did your ex ever contact you?

@@cindiheaton1048 no

he is also right that sometimes over time yu have to reach out to an avoidant because there are too stubborn to

Update?

@@kenbear9290 never talked again. Dating someone new. More attractive, cooks with me and helps me clean. I don’t think about the other girl at all anymore. My advice is to cut all contact. Try to keep yourself occupied and time will heal you. If you do what you are supposed to do regardless of external circumstances everything will line up the way it’s supposed to. Life is too short to worry about women.

@@kenbear9290 I typed a response to you but I don’t think it went through. I haven’t talked to the girl in almost 2 years now. Don’t really think about her ever. I’m dating someone much more attractive now.

Qualities I like in a RU-vid video 👍👍

Im almost at 45 days

She will reach out for sure at some point. NC always works. Stay strong.

@Eve ala hey how's things going ? Any positive sign on your way ?

Yep I am on almost exactly 60 days of no contact. Haven't heard from her but yet do not plan on ever reaching out to her.

I thank God I'm a loyal honest guy, unfortunately my wife said she doesn't feel happy with me anymore ,I never cheated on her not even once. we met each other in high school, she dated guys that cheated and used her I'm the only one who didn't cheat or used her That's how much I love her I really pray to God she regrets leaving me leaving a true love loyal,honest guy. she will realize the grass is never greener on the other side.

Thanks man, I wish you the best.

Any updates?

@@brandonwhitbeck2452 Yeah i met a new girl

God man you suck lol , you better be studying and learn how to keep that woman happy or you may not have this chance again

Dude you're so lucky

And how old r you ? 13?

Good idea.

@@hex1473 exactly

Yeah it would b a huge group of people who were in love with someone and emotionally unavailable!

@@JennyJenny-yr2mh Or maybe people who have been through hell but who still have the power to be vulnerable with someone else. Just because someone has been abandoned does not make them emotionally unavailable

@@jipuragi1297 Part of good mental health is ability to give and receive love. People that have been hurt and haven’t processed it or grieved over it come across as angry and better. Therefore, they’re really not available for a relationship.

Hey, what happened in your case? Did their relationship last, are you two back together? Me and my ex also broke up 5 months ago and he is dating with somebody else, they just posted their relationship on fb.

@@mirelapopa7612 how are you now?any update about your ex and your NC?

I’m honored. Thank you for telling me. I’m sorry you are going through this.

Really ! LoL 😂😆

Lol. Love it

Haha

I love u too lol sorry had to

😂😂😂🤣😍👌

Yeah he’s a fantastic Coach! He’s videos have helped in the darkest of hours.

Yesssssss. I will never ever contact her again as long as I have a pulse.

Winter Tarzan Jagrup How the hell are u single? Lol

lol

That’s exactly what I told myself.

😂❤️

Yes.

Yes i badly needed help

Wow.. this girl is everywhere.. hope you get your ex back..

Bro I feel you it's been a little over a month now and I was begging and pleading for almost another month I told her I can't just be friends yesterday now I'm on NC day 1 I hope it works wish me luck.

@@thetruthhurtsforreal3084 did it work?

@@thetruthhurtsforreal3084 any updates?

I got her back🥰

How long did it take?

Agreed!!

Thank you for your kind words Mpangmei!

James, she obviously lost attraction for you. Let her go, and DO NOT be just friends with her. It won't work. Best of luck.

@@jannlewandowski5540 was a year ago. I'm good man

Update?

@@myhouse99 She's been reaching out to me a lot. Sometimes after a few days, sometimes longer. She misses what we did together and says she can't get me out of her head! She's not asking for the relationship back yet but that's fine. I was a mess for months about losing her so it's only fair I give her an equal amount of time to come back if she wants to. I broke no-contact two days ago to apologize for pressuring her to be a better girlfriend when she had clearly left me already. I said I shouldn't have applied girlfriend standards to her when she didn't even want that role anymore. I still have issues with how she treated me but as an ex she doesn't owe me anything. I apologized for creating guilt in her building a new relationship with someone else. I don't want to be a barrier between her and happiness. This wasn't a manipulation tactic, I do honestly want her to be happy even if that means being with someone else. She took this very well and also said she's not with anyone else yet. It sucks that I lost time with no-contact but it's been two months and I don't regret this descision. Usually you want to stay in no-contact but for my case this was good because I did have something to say sorry for. Clear the air with your issues first so it doesn't hurt your own attractiveness, worry about theirs with a licensed counselor later. If you've already said sorry for something you did then just leave it. They have to process it much more than we do.

​@@MB-eb9ed we are lesbian couple too. I brokeup because I was so mad but in the end she left our place,she move god knows where but she meet people,go out,drinking,having fun ... at least yours send you msg...

@@espora_ I’m sorry if it’s still hurting for you. My girl came back a lot towards me since I made that comment and is giving practical objections (we live far away). I don’t fight her on this because of course she’d make it work if that’s what she wanted. I’m just doing everything I can to be as attractive as I can be. That’s all you should do and that’s all you can do. Stick to Coach Lee. He reduces the pain and gets you back on track, with or without your ex. I am still hoping with but (for me) I’m okay if she doesn’t want it. I’d rather she be happy without me instead of sad with me.

​@@MB-eb9ed yeah,I understand you...but for now it is too early to wish that she is far away from me.I will lie if I say that I don't have hope...because I do.A lot. And what's worse,next day after she left I got fired at work. I lost 6kg in 10 days, but I start slowly with gym so I hope for myself and my body that I will get on track. Are you okay?

Contact is a message with words directed only to you. Not a like or a look.

@@RealCoachLee Yes ! Thank you Lee

Long Distance Breakup - really very challenging and complicated. Need strong honest advice Coach Lee. I am pretty sure many can relate including myself. Thank you in advance, coach!

Im in the same situación, I broke up with her due to long distance, now she is coming to my City again and I would love to be together again but she says she is not willing to give me another chance.. Any advice?

This is the crudest trial. In it myself now since October

In the same situation

In same situation

😂😂

@Belltown Daisy You just said it. That extra step.

Try Kevin Hicks as well. I like him and Lee, because when you feel weak and ready to go and beg your ex to come back, they slap you into your senses in a very good way :D

Well i did nc for 15 days and she asked me to return but after several months and we just broke up again..lesson: Dont return its not worth it

royal zlips or maybe she’s just a shitty toxic person who knows he can do better?

Because the people who get their ex back stop watching the videos lol

@@hefhefner3507 that's exactly right

Iv read a few where exes got married....i think u can’t just go with anyone’s experience tho... every one and every connection is different

This is where I’m at, incredibly intense attraction and 3-4 months before it ended

That's too short

Me too.. 4 months but it was very intense. So much more than my last 4 year relationship. It’s been a month of no contact and I still feel like I love him. I wish he would reach out 😢

Any updates ? I’ve been in a relationship for a month but it was so intense !!!! Things went really too fast and scared her off.

Chemistry is NOT connection! It's often confused. If things are so intense in the beginning and take off like a rocket chances are likely the rocket crashes down just as quickly. The other person after the hot honeymoon phase found something that their gut feeling tells them they are just not feeling it. If they come back which is possible its because they ran out of options. I'd be hesitant to take them back because most often reigniting the hot honeymoon phase will not work and they will be disappointed and break up again as soon as a seemingly better option crosses their path.

Clarraim, don't wait. Move on. If they reach out, it will be when they want to. But I do agree with Lee. When they do contact you, be professional. Don't be petty. Be happy, move forward. Most likely you will find someone better for you.

I agree with JJ, for me it's been 10 months, and dumped is not valued, not appreciated, not wanted. We deserve SOOOOOOOOOOOO much more than this. Work on your life, make it better, and then you won't even wanna watch these videos anymore. Or remember she existed in that type of a status in your heart and mind. Let it happen, don't hold on.

Clarraim Definitely not. You shouldn’t be waiting at all. I know that it’s difficult though.

@@DayaTom In one of his video he tackled "when to break NC". I think he made a very strong point there. Contact when his/her defense is down.

@@alvinserwelas6328 I'm not planning to ever contacting them.

I‘m so sorry to hear that! Did he reach out later? Maybe he needed more time?

Not true

This is sad , I need help myself and that's why she left me , now I get to see how it is from the girls perspective , maybe what if he did better would you consider taking him back if he turned himself around ????

Sweetie, we broken up exactly when you posted this. Me too ive been told that he still lives me but cant do it with me anymore. He would check my stories till today, today he unfollowed and set his status back to single. Why? I simply havent daid anything to him in two days, even if he reaced out yesterday. So im starting to doubt the version on "no contact " displayed by many coaches out there. No you shouldnt contact back all the time, but if theyre interested in something i think you should. If ypu dont have someone to talk to, im here for you. I mean it. We've got this :)

As a man I really think you need a break. A long one, if even you still love your ex. That way if you probably come together again after a year at least he'd know your emotions should not be toyed with and trust me he'll know your true value - he'll never try that with you again if he truly loves you. Don't be afraid to go a year without him. If he truly loves you he'll work on getting you back for a whole year. If he doesn't come back then he wasn't meant for you. There are better men out there. Your value is most important here. Self love is the only thing that should matter to you right now my dear.

You're strong. I'm sorry.

Yes please.

Yes Please! This just happened to me..

YES PLEASE. been dating someone for 2 years.

yes please! same thing : ( we lived together and then he moved for a job and then poof.. its over :(

Yes please

Why are you so worry about it .. one day at a time.. if doesn't work than you will find someone even more better. You find someone who will respect you . You deserve love and real happiness. May God give you the strength to move on. I think it's should be the best thing you did move on.....

At least you’ve got some form of contact buddy.

I think the hot cold treatment is stupid when I love a woman I love that woman and never want to be apart from her , and when a woman loves me she loves me and same goes , it's relationships that are really ify in the first place where you see this hot cold hot cold , it's someone who knows they have options and therefore see you just as this an option that's not love

thomasc6214, Are you trying to get back together? If so, Coach Lee has a workshop that would be ideal for you.know it's really difficult and I've certainly been there. I don't know if you are aware, but Coach Lee has a live workshop called "Relationship Reignite." It's an incredible learning experience that I just can't say enough about. It focuses on saving a relationship from a breakup/separation and then keeping it after. It includes a coaching call each month for 6 months. You can talk to Coach Lee's team about it. I think the person for this is named Johnny and you can make an appointment with him to talk about it at myexbackcoach.com/relationship-reignite. I think you'll agree that it's an incredibly eye-opening and immensely helpful experience for you.

no

Wondering how things turned up for you?

What’s your update mate?

Redranger887, maybe she hopes you contact her. Who knows maybe she waiting you take iniative to "save" the marriage.

Good. You are giving yourself the best chance possible. I wish you the best.

I’m doing the same. He has not contacted me though. Any updates

How did it go?

Hit my son up. Drama L!ve RU-vid channel. He needs a friend rn

Yes, I agree. But if you want them and they want something different, then you are both going after what you want in the moment.

@@RealCoachLee you're right...but still it feels like a never ending nightmare

@@RealCoachLee can you please answer my question in my preivous comment?:)

@@micallll100 give us an update. What happened

A week is way too early to expect anything so try to keep your head up.

How much time it took him to come back?

4 days.

I did that because the person hurt me they didn’t know but I said I was sensitive boe it’s over unless they reach out bc Im not good with conflict ... what happened ...

@@themoonbleu627 Are you him? I'm asking becouse he used those same words about not being good with conflicts.

@@themoonbleu627 He reached out and It made my day, we had a short chat then he stopped answering. I don't know what is going through his head.

How’d that end up ?

@@r80ishere not good mate, now we don't talk and I'm having to take her to court to see my kid.

​@@-Turner-Oh wow

​@@SVAsianPhilippinesGo6858sorry for him

​@@-Turner-oof