When You Take Coffee TOO Seriously! 

I thought about that, but the cost of getting a decent one seemed not worth it. And of course it isn't going to do a better job than the local coffee merchant that i normally get my beans from (or wait.. is small batch roasting better?). Perhaps one day i will get one for the experience.. i know the aroma is quite something, i worked in someone's house who roasted their own beans.

Only 3 ? 🤣🤣🤣

Wine snobs should get roasted next

Same, roast 1-2lbs a week in my Behmor 1600. So worth it.

I roast my beans too, they dont seems to appreciate the insults

Then JP did his job👍

Yes I hear you. I’ve always taken a laugh at JP’s subtle tease of the crazy times we are living but this time I’m the joke! Oh well, I’ll just whip up an espresso and feel better:)

I grew fond of coffee because a friend of mine owns a coffee shop and his brews are nice... I don't take it seriously though. Neither does he. He experiments with new recipes for frappuccino and smoothies. His business has this theme of 19th century laboratory. And he's a más scientist of coffee.

@@SergioLeonardoCornejo I know a brewery that's kind of like that. Love their stuff, and I'd be a regular customer of your friend's establishment if I lived nearby.

@@TheInsomniaddict Name checks out. Lol

How much did you spit out? Sorry, I didn't have friends either

Or he weighs his coffee because he didn't get laid until 28 years old.

I weigh coffee grounds for work (I work at a coffee shop).

same.

It was so abrupt 🤣

Don't forget bringing out the gravitational notes of the coffee

Classic taste of that coffee from the Tarrazú canton regions in Costa Rica if you ask me

My great grandmother would brew her drip coffee at night, then turn the pot off and let it sit. In the morning she would pour her cup and microwave it. You could try that!

I'd certainly need to also have the -after it all ,coffee ..Just to relax from all the activity.

Have some before bed...then you are prepped

Yeah, they are clever democrats

Cool avatar and name too. :)

@@homeschooldaddyjournal9839 what does that have to do with anything?

@@alms07 its only coffee

I like orange 🍊. And orange men. That have lots of 💰

He is awake

What is even better is that I think he is poking fun at himself. I mean, he didn't go out and buy all that crap just to make a youtube video. I think he is a coffee nerd, and went ahead making a satire video about coffee nerds anyway. So I doubt he is the type to go and try and make himself look sophisticated on facebook with his espresso and pourover coffee pot, but I bet he does enjoy a good cup of coffee.

@@theartistbonez1930 a woke

This is how you get ready for a peaceful protest

Social ++ credits

If you have 3 espresso machines, you're an amateur who can't commit.

What is that white on red symbol? Is that from Robotech (Macross)?

nicely done, Captain, nicely done.

@@3-DtimeCosmology Yes. 🙂

My thoughts exactly. He might as well drink the stuff that collects over the months in that try under the starbucks "coffee"machine. Fucking poser.

Says the man who gets his tea out of a vending machine 😝

It brings out the gravitational notes in the coffee

I've had three strong cups of coffee before bedtime and he's not wrong there.

i love how he throws that in there because one sounds healthy and the other doesnt but he makes it sound healthy.. only JP can pull that off i think..

Bripe? *Googles* What. The. F##k?! $90 to make a whopping 1oz of hot brown via a convoluted process. To each their own; but that has got to be one of, if not the, whitest hipster things I've ever seen! *lol*

@@TheFastgeek all I can reply to this ignorance, is that briping is magnificent! ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-tltBHjmIUJ0.html

^^^ how you know @Traspler knows coffee

What in the world is a "bripe"? 🤦‍♂️ I mean, I know what a "brips" is, but a "bripe"?

Ain't that the truth !

And this casual reference to the caffeine deprivation induced psychosis everyone thinks is so funny is the reason i consider coffee to be on par with any other "hard drug". My favorite is "dont talk to me until iv had my coffee" translation "i cannot be expected to behave like a rational human being until iv had my fix". The only difference between a meth addict and a coffee addict is their access to their drug of choice.

@Victor Alvarez no i dont see a difference, amphetamines can make you more productive if used in moderation. As you admitted caffeine has all the same deleterious effects as meth if used irresponsibly. Why do you think students take riddalen when studying, why do you think the military uses amphetamines for long deployments (they call them "stims" so they dont have to feel like drug addicts)? As i said the only difference is the ease of access. One of the main factors that contributes to the instability of illegal drug users is not the drug itself, but rather the highs and lows that come from an inconsistent and expensive supply chain. But just like alcoholics, who will play whatever mental gymnastics to justify their own addiction while being judgmental of others i knew there'd be some caffeine addicts who would do the same. I dont use meth btw and i do drink coffee and energy drinks, im just not a hypocrite about it.

I don't drink coffee. World, consider yourself warned...

@Victor Alvarez amphetamines are stimulants. Students, military personnel and even truck drivers all use them for their stimulating properties. Caffeine releases endorphins just like any other drug. Why do you think it results in psychosis if you dont keep your levels up. Functional drug addicts are everywhere, just like functional alcoholics. You dont notice them because they generally have jobs that allow them to stay high both economically and through a lack of drug testing. In fact the drug and alcohol training i received at my work when we introduced drug testing claimed that about 70% of drug addicts have jobs. it's well know in the medical community that some of the best surgeons help themselves to either morphine or oxycontin and everyone turns a blind eye because it makes them better surgeons, givng them a steady hand and helpng them get into "the zone". Im not saying excessive use of any drug is a good thing, im just pointing out that the line we draw is entirely arbitrary. But whatever dude, you've clearly let the government/hollyweird propaganda on the subject seep to far into your brain and, like most people, are incapable of thinking for yourself on the matter.

buttttt I'm addicted ugh Lol

OMG! 🤣🤣🤣

Ok. It's time JP to fess up.....who? Is it? That brilliantly comes out w\your material?? Every video is terrific🐊 So.. who could it be?? Perhaps Mrs. JP?🤔 .

And he says, "and just relax while my heart races"... I died

Funniest part

😂ikr

I was looking for this one to support JP and the algorithm.

A little of both maybe? Lol

😂😅

Does she send people to concentration camps who cant brew a good cup of coffee?🤣

@@ankit0657 ooooh, thanks for the summer project idea

Just dont drink robusta yuck haha

I was just listening to that part as I read this

JP should do wine snobs next!

I died😂😂

My grandma would start off with my cousins names and just go down the list until she got it. My cousins are girls :/

hey are you to much coffee ?

ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-tDYqUV8Ozak.html

🤣😂

I recently learned that coffee wakes you up because it has toxins inside it that the body tries to get rid of by increasing you heat rate, pumping it out of you body to pee out. That's what gives you the wake feeling. Enjoy your coffee.

Monsters come in all shapes and sizes.

And they can smell it.mmmmmm

ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-tDYqUV8Ozak.html

lol

Intervention time.

Mine too

hahahaha!

That one hit close to home.

Died laughing on that note!

Moka Pot is another option

To close! Got my french press a yr ago!🥴

Well, this explains why I have a pour over and a $600 espresso machine. Man, I’m need to get out more often.

ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-tDYqUV8Ozak.html

superhomeopathicallicious

Yes, if you think he's being sarcastic it means that you're not taking coffee seriously. Shame on you.

He was seriously sarcastic

They are props for the skit.

Like Babylon-bee. Satire, but Not.

@@GreggAdventure Haha only serious.

But it must come from the HIPS!

@@suzannehartmann946 😂

Kristin haha 😂 yaaaas!

If I knew what a fibonacci was, it might have gotten me as well!

The sum of vices is constant..

Fast metabolisers of caffeine can sleep within an hour of ingestion. Slow metabolisers will take more than eight hours, commonly ten.

@@jessicali8594 or the adrenal glands are so worn out that it literally does nothing anymore besides prevent withdrawal headaches

That's not good, but I wish you well on your recovery. I hope you find a better way to cope.

Does "recovering alcoholic" mean that you can enjoy alcohol again ?

@UOS BOIII Who could afford their coffee? I was at a Bass pro shop in Missouri recently and Black Rifle was $20 lb.[ f,ing crazy] I haven't been to a Starbucks in over a decade, DD is cheaper and better. The absolute best coffee seems to always be at your local Diner.

That was my favorite part!

It's funny because it's true

Definitely the best line.

My favorite part because... I weigh my beans before going in the hopper, coming out of the grinder, and brewing into the cup. What led me to this 😂

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

And still a hilarious skit!

Definitely very intelligent and has serious linguistic skills! I am a math and science person so I am blown away by all of JP's creative verbiage.

Same!!

Inspired humor. 😃😄

hahaha that's exactly what I thought when I saw the grinder....and the bag of unknown roast on date coffee lol

Not to mention the abuse of the Chemex paper and that awful tamp 😵

When he didn’t distribute before tamping, and tapped the sides of the basket, i experienced actual pain X(

Same.

I'd say he was DEFINITELY trolling us all!

Was looking for this comment 😂 remarkable

"Hey, man. How do you take your coffee?" "Anyway that doesn't involve decaf or hazelnut."

This one! 🤣👍🏻

Gonna need some context for that one, feller.

@@njamison1000 I was wondering what they meant too.

Black Rifle needs a lil Tom Macdonald in their life right now

"Portland, Oregon. Where even the homeless are picky about the coffee they drink." From the movie 'Extreme Days'.

Doesn't even weigh the water going into the Chemex. Pshh, not that serious I guess lol

Dude. My head exploded.

Did you see how hard he tamped it 😂

@@domonator1167 I thought I was the only one felt he’s doing it wrong

The subtle misuse of the equipment is part of this excellent satire.

Right!!?!?! I'm dying!!!!

Clearly all the kids at his school were too intimidated by him to be his friends XD

ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-tDYqUV8Ozak.html

🤣🤣🤣

ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-tDYqUV8Ozak.html

Gah, me too hopefully it's not that fancy pants machine 😁

Seriously! I thought the same thing! Plus...30 seconds?

A must with only lemon peel rimmmmm

Same.

@@marcsmith2708 no doubt my shots need to be 26.5 or i toss it

Rotlf

seriously- I wanna know!

Same here :-)

Is that why i see people put coffee filters on their face while driving ?

This deserves more likes.

Same! "Coffee I need, or kill you I will."

Thanks for killing yourself so I don't

Same!

But most moderates and conservatives and take a friendly joke.

@@whitemagus2000 oh of course lol I myself love black rifle and think this was perfect

Black Rifle wouldn't have it any other way. It's the only coffee company that will go out of its way to publicly disavow a customer if you've ever had to use an actual black rifle to defend your own life.

I look forward to being insulted like this again. There is a reason commies can't do memes.

@@KnuckleHunkybuck Source?

You know, your coffee is probably like that because you had friends in high school. 😁

I buy beans green and wholesale, I have a cheap propeller grinder (the hand-crank mill is for camping), and I make it in either a hot-water reserve drip machine (they don't overheat the water) or in a blue enamelware camp pot. Wholesale single-origin green, unroasted beans are $4.50 or so a pound. Folgers is $3.70 a pound. Starbucks shelf-brand is $10.39 a pound. The quality difference in whole bean versus pre-ground is tremendous because pre-ground goes stale in a day or two. Green coffee beans don't start going stale for years. Learn the very basic art of roasting (turkey roasting pan in the oven, shake it around every few seconds, listen to the pops) and there you go. If it seems pretentious just remind yourself store-bought pre-roasted and pre-ground was for fancy city people not one hundred years ago. All coffee beans were traded green before the railroads.

LOL!!!