Why Empaths Attract Toxic People | How to Protect Yourself | FREE COACHING GIVEAWAY 

I stopped believing EVERYONE is good .. now they need to prove it

Narcissists also know how to find someone with a bright light, and they do everything in their power to try to dim it.

Boundaries! Boundaries! Boundaries! If someone shows you who they are and don't respect your boundaries, RUN LIKE HELL!

Don't put up a wall. Put up a screen. That way it lets the breeze come through, but keeps the bugs out. 😉💜 This is an EXCELLENT video! Thank you!

You believe everyone is good: this is what ruined my life.

I almost married a narcissist - HIS OWN FAMILY talked me out of marrying him. If that's not a red flag, I don't know what is!

I am an empath. The first step in healing and getting to know yourself. Kinda like admitting you're an alcoholic. In this case, I am an empath. 36 and a half years married to a narcissist. Divorced 5 years ago. The inner peace is priceless, my love of animals is great. I trust animals more than I do people. Life is beautiful. Everyday a blessing.

Sometimes I wish I wasn’t an empath. Sometimes I love being an empath. All in all it’s extremely draining because I can feel everyone’s feelings on an extreme level. I feel so tired at the end of the day.

I’m a male empath and I’ve attracted many narcs over my years. My siblings are pathological liars and narcs. My ex’s were narcs too. They zero in on you because you give freely with no expectations in return. Emotional vampires. I almost took my life in my early twenties because of all the emotional draining. I found God and started building a solid foundation. Videos like yours has helped tremendously.

yes,narcissists like nice people so they can manipulate them easily.

I worked on myself for 3 years, built a happy life, didn’t NEED anyone but WANTED someone, have amazing intuition, and still attracted someone with these toxic attributes

I wish I’d known about the term, “empath” 10 years ago. It would have saved me a lot of grief, time and energy. Very well done presentation BTW.

I do think that a great majority of "empaths" are people who grew up surrounded by narcissists and learning that they are insignificant, meaningless and easy to discard so they tend to throw their lives at the feet of others hoping that their love and boundless loyalty will gain them the love they never received as children.. Also empaths don't have the self love or confidence to need or even feel comfortable receiving love.. I know it, because I am an empath. I said "no more" 2 years ago and now I'm putting myself first, ALWAYS

We NEED to spread this message of what emotional abuse looks like! SPREAD NARC AWARENESS!!!

To my same empathetic people...just put a limit in everything you do. Always in between, be balance. Like be good (well it's natural to us).,but don't be stupid too. Love you all💜

Make a list of 50 things you're proud of about yourself... Yes, 50. It'll help you nail down your identity so you can't be told who you are by someone who can't see you

As an empath, it is so easy to get addicted to a narcissist. They know exactly how to manipulate your good traits to their advantage. I've suffered for years because the addiction is so hard to escape. A very good presentation Stephanie, I found this helpful.

Boundaries are an empath's best friend. Going into 5D, we need to couple love with wisdom. Healthy boundaries are the best way to do this.

Being an empath has taught me about myself that I must be very careful at all times who I am choosing to enter my life, I am more careful!

“It’s not about trusting other people, it’s about learning how to love yourself and trusting Yourself.” Beautifully stated. That really is the crux. We can’t care for others if we don’t care for ourselves. Thanks for posting this video. The empath-narcissist dynamic is very well-explained.

Pay attention to a person's patterns over time and your intuition and you will live a wonderful life if you don't stand for anyone who oversteps your boundaries

What's worse is that when you confront these narcissists about their abusive behaviour, it's like a shock to them . It's as if they don't even know that are narcissistic lol. But deep down they do

I was an empathy all my life and all my resources were sucked out of me by sociopaths, narcissist and cluster-b personalities. You’re being SUPER generous when you mention that they often will fake superficial apologies! Almost all the ones I met become hostile and indignant when I finally called them out. And since they had obsoletely NOTHING invested in the relationship, they grabbed everything they could and just walked away with an evil “ I got over” smirk on their faces! It’s a bit late now in my life however I have learned the grandest of lessons!!

Toxic people are toxic people regardless of who you are. Nothing to do with who you are. It's not your fault a toxic person comes into your life, however You are responsible with what you do about it.

Healing is the key. Getting free of narcissists involves healing childhood trauma. Unmet childhood needs are common and can be healed, through accepting and taking care of yourself. Loving yourself, more than needing another person, is the key to walking away from anyone who harms or hurts you. Realising that you don’t truly need anybody, because you are an adult who can meet your own needs, is powerful and can transform your life. Anybody can do this. Thanks Stephanie Lyn, for speaking up about your experiences and helping people on their journey.

I was once told: "Don't expect people to treat you like you would treat them." Fortunately for me now, I am now with people who are nice, pleasant and friendly towards me.

Now when I meet someone I don’t really say too much I just listen and observe and don’t really talk much .

You hit the nail on the head. Often abuse takes place because we don’t know what to look for and like you said, empaths always see the best so it’s hard to equate certain behaviour as ‘abuse’. Often, when I’ve recognised abuse in relationships I told myself I was being too picky and judgemental and just ignored the red flags. I’m now learning to love myself, know my value and set boundaries.

I live alone with 7 dogs. I'm officially broken and have given up on other people. I find that I'm much happier adjusting to life without toxicity than taking the chance being around people who especially nowadays are really self-entitled and narcissistic.

I've been there, now I closed doors for so many people in my life and I'm fully focussing on myself.

Omg I found ppl like me 😢my beautifull empaths I thought i was alone love yall

For a narcissist to be happy, two conditions have to be met. One, they regularly need a victim to hurt. Two, they have to get away with it. (They require being regarded as still good, fine people because they would never hurt anyone willingly, or nobody else knows they like to hurt people).

Yes that's very true I'm an empath and I stayed for 13 years in a marriage I knew he had a very bad childhood and I really felt bad for him I wanted to make it better not realizing you can not fix these people

I stopped thinking all people were good after dating a narcissist and realizing they had this disorder. Now I know to gather information about someone first. Knowing that not all people are good was hard to accept but it helps stop toxic people from coming into your life.

Thank you for the validation I desperately needed. After my 3rd toxic relationship in a row, I am trying to figure out what is wrong with me. This has given me some light from the dark place I am in.

I am very emphatetic but still With self esteem so i avoided a relation With a narcisist, congrats to me

empaths need to dive into spirituality if they haven't already, and STAY AWAY from alcohol (spirits)... your welcome

From personal experience with narcissists, and from getting out of relationships with them, I can say that the problem with narcissists is US. When we’re healthy, whether we’re empaths or not, narcissists perceive our inner self-worth, self-love, and boundaries and don’t even come close to us. We instinctively repel them. If we have to work with them, they keep their distance. They know who they can pray on and who they can’t. Narcissists tend to have a fragile ego. People who are whole and emotionally healthy scares them away. Take your focus away from the narcissist in your life and focus on you-healing your inner child.

As a highly sensitive person/empath, I’m so thankful that my husband is genuine, caring, loyal and loving. God had grace on me. But...man I attract all the narcissistic friends. It’s a very painful experience. Trying so hard to break that cycle and establish genuine friendship. Probably because my mom and sister are narcissistic 🤔💔

I'm a empathy daughter, and my mom is for sure narcissist 😭

I was an empath and co-dependent to the max. Then the pain of being used and abused became too much. Then I turned to working hard to deepen spiritually and work on and develop and ask for my relationship with my Creator who knows me inside and out. And slowly over many painful, really lonely years spent confronting this issue, I slowly pulled out of this pattern. I'm better now but have to stay vigilant every day. (Please don't think that I'm saying I was a perfect person. I'm not. But I was misguided willing to override myself and my basic needs and give everything I had away, including my $$, to others who didn't deserve or need it. I don't do that anymore.) We all can heal. God bless you all.

Even if you are healed, I think someone who is narcissist does can find a way (may you have a weakness for a special period) to manipulate you slowly and artisticly. Then you have to notice the signs and go away. We are not always that strong and confident!! The best video ever!!! Thank you so musc!

Everything you said in this video was absolutely the best advice. It's NOT just knowing about narcissistic abuse, or how to spot a narcissist, it's ALL about finding a way to love yourself so much that no one can break that love. You have set boundaries and stick to them. You respect yourself, you won't tolerate any form of abuse again and have the strength to leave a relationship, should red flags appear. I've been involved in 3 relationships with both narcissists and a true psychopath. I have learned so much and am on the path to self discovery and self love. It's not easy, but I'm doing the work daily and feeling better about me, slowly but surely. I am far from where I want to be, but I have faith that I WILL get to a place in my life where I'm strong and love myself more than ever before.

Very beautifully explained! Many people don't know that they are going through abuse from a narcissist. Because they know something is off about someone or situation but they ignore that intuition. They should build and work on themselves mentally first to tackle any type of narcissist. Thanks for the great video 🌷

Empaths feel a lot of different emotions, my mom is actually a narcassist, for a long time i was mad at her for the way she treated me after my grandmother died, she spent her life drinking and losing her jobs but i broke away from it and left the money my grandmother gave me to my sister that lives with her, empaths are very giving too and not easily bought by money, thats why people feed off them but if i can break free of it then anybody can do it. Its all about will power and putting your foot down when people cross your boundries.

That part about healing inside and setting boundaries not just being able to recognize narcissism really resonates. Working on it.

It's so sad that you go throughout your entire life deeply caring about the feelings of others that you end up attracting those who want nothing more than to destroy you and completely disregard your feelings. Like wtf is wrong with our genetic makeup as humans to even have that be a thing?

You can be an empathetic and not be co-dependent.

Thank you for this! I think as empaths we’re also able to sense negative energy and ulterior motives. We should use that as an asset to guard our hearts

I am an empath and one of the key things that I realized is that narcissists and empaths are two sides to the same coin, meaning, the root of our behavior stems from the same underlying cause: insecurity. It is only that we have two opposing strategies to deal with it: one to care and get as close as possible and one to not care and to pull away (like anxious and avoidant attachment theory). No wonder we attract one another. That realization has made me realize that narcissists are not simply evil beings and I am not just a kind-hearted victim, as that narrative takes away my personal responsibility for my flawed strategy to deal with my insecurities. Furthermore, as there will always be narcissists in the world as they will not have the self-awareness to realize that they themselves are the problem, it's up to me and me only to protect myself against that by dealing with my insecurities. Best of luck to anyone trying to deal with their insecurities.

Thank you. I needed this video. I had a "friendship" with someone who I got very close to, but ended up using me. Part of me still sees them as a good person, but their behaviour says otherwise: bullying, gas lighting, ignoring, undermining. They are a narcissist and I need to let go. Wish I wasn't an empath - too many feels, and not just my own.

Again, my mom is a narrisist and she is very hard to deal with I can't have a relationship with her nor do I want to.

I am so glad I found you! You have inspired me to really work hard on self-love and how to trust my instincts. I broke up with an emotionally-charged man who was extremely selfish before Christmas. I realize now I cant make excuses for bad behavior and decided being alone is best so I can learn to love myself again and find what makes me happy. Me happy- not another individual ❤️

I love being an empath. It has been extremely rough and very painful because I am codependent and I have loved several narcissists. I have a child with one, however I am learning how to love myself, slowly, one day at a time. It is hard sometimes but it is a gift to be so caring and loving, there are just many tools I have yet to learn. Looking forward to the journey. Grateful for the process.

My inner child was crying watching this video, thank you for helping me so much, I’m working on my self love

Been there, done that. Thankfully, I jumped ship to save my life.

I'm an empath, who recently cut off my narc-ex. Its a scary stage, focusing on self-care and enjoying life on my own! I should hope that I'm a more educated empath now but I take it that we need to develop our lives and selves to the point of 'not needing' anyone and coming from a place of abundance - rather than lack. Many thanks for your videos and helping me identify further where things could improve and pick better partners!!!

Thank you so much. I've recently come out of a narcissistic relationship and didn't even realize I was attracting these kinds of people. Now that I know it starts with me and that I can recognize the areas in myself I need to work on, I will be much more aware in the future.

Wow this was incredibly stated and I feel like you just verbalized everything I’ve been working towards and feeling was true all along. I want to share this with everyone! Thank you 🤗

I'm empath but I'm also nasty to nasty people, toxic to toxic people. I have no trouble cutting off contact with those hopelessly obnoxious people.

Thank you Stephanie for this video, I’ve always attracted narcissists as I’m a people pleaser and empath, so they see me coming, I’m in need of your coaching, your videos are the first step to healing as I practice self love, so thank you 🙏🏾

Being with a narcissistic person is almost like stepping onto a rollercoaster 🎢 ride that you can’t get off. An emotional roller coaster.

Damn! I needed to hear this! You’re were Spot on! I learned soooooo much about myself of 42 years wrapped up in less than 15 minutes ... im still blown away....I definitely need to work on self love and break the co-dependency with my ex who is a complete narcissist!

1jw2 we empaths always win in ther end.due to our pure good heart.god have a covering over us.

This was and still is me. I was always looking for "the one", the one to love and see me in a way I couldn't for myself. I am learning to be ok with me. Great video Steph!!!

So true. Thank you..just had to distance myself from an narcissist friend. I was constantly being snapped at, then they would apologise and do it all again. Damned if l do and damned if l don't. Had to pretty much tell them their toxic and avoid my social group to avoid them.

Just found out I'm INFJ after watching vids on the subject omg!!! After watching your video I'm so thankful to know the relationships in my life were all my fault becuz of my INFJ personality I mean you straight up described a relationship I'm in and how this individual hooked me 💯 by being 2 different people...the normal & the nars. I've finally realized last week this person never loved me and they have 0 empathy. I'm working hard to move on...it's a slow process but I'm feeling so much better today that im taking time to take care of my needs. Wow, I can't talk enough about this video. Thank you Stephanie much much ❤️ & respect.

Currently walking through a divorce with my narc husband and he refuses to move out!! Your videos have helped me so much to learn to hold onto myself and not react to his tactics. Thanks so much!

This happened to me!!! I’m an empath and am married to a narcissist (he’s not a full fledge BUT he got tons of traits). Thanks for this explanation!

This describes my situation so well it’s scary.. I’m a co dependent empath for sure. This really reached me. Explains so much. Thank you !

Love this!! I had a hard time loving myself because I felt it was selfish to only think about you but this is what I needed to hear ❤️❤️‼️

It's amazing people like you that make this world a better place. Thank you for this video!

It was hard for me for many years having a family member that is a narcissist. but I am no longer swayed by that type of person . Healthy boundaries is all I will say.

Thank you for sharing! Definitely helped to learn that just being able to spot the behavior isn't enough. Been working on myself & healing my wounds & made a promise to not date, only friend dates, no sex/intimacy until I've processed. It's been so incredibly helpful & life changing.

Thank you, Stephanie. It's stunning how freeing and validating it is to hear others speak out the exact same patterns I've seen throughout an abusive relationship I've just exited from ( without deviation, addition or subraction ). One can know a thing intimately, but when it's spoken out time and time again -- excatly as I saw it unfold -- by multiple other people, it does something to validate and free a person inside. Basically, i KNEW what was going on ( tactics-wise) throughout the relationship, but these videos ( and many others like it ) have helped to validate something that I only just realized was being eroded throughout the relationship -- confidence in my own SANITY ! THAT was something I only just noticed after ending a relationship with someone who has exhibited BPD & NPD ( with a touch of DID thrown in, just to spice it up ), for the past two years. Thank you for putting these videos out there, Stephanie. This truly was a missing key that I just recaptured, and it has truly blessed me. THANK YOU !!! :- D

Watching this video I thought a lot about how I let someone hurt me and how much I still have to work on myself....but I also felt like through educating myself about narcissism and emotional abuse in general,there has been an improvement in my life and that yes,we can change and be able to finally take care and love ourselves . You are helping us a lot,thank you💐

Keep the videos coming Stephanie!!! You are helping me so much!

It's a 9 to 1 ratio narcissists to empaths, so when a narcissist does prey on you, they don't let go easily, which is why so many of these relationships end in violence. Because there are so few empaths, it's very difficult for them to find each other. So, you end up a very emotionally healthy person living alone with your dog(s) and/or cat(s).

This video was so accurate and so well explained!! God this is exactly the dynamic I have been in!! Thank you for helping me realise what I need to work on. Protecting myself and not thinking everyone has a loving open heart like me!

Your talks have contained some of the missing ingredients in my journey of healing and learning to love myself, a journey of over 20 years. I’ll never stop seeking wholeness ; there’s always another layer, something new to discover. You are clear and speak well and I thank you for your time and efforts.

Thank you!! This was the best explanation of empathy and codependency that I’ve ever heard. I am an empath but I am not codependent. That’s why I was able to leave my narcissist ex husband 4 months after we got married.

This has helped me so much thank you, I’ve been struggling being an empath and controlling my mind and relationships. I can’t thank you enough!!

Alot of physical Distance from toxic people helps so much cause it helped me ❤😊

I LOVED this video, it hit the nail on the head for me in every single thing you said!!! Thank you for this 💗

Wow! Stephanie is incredible how the universe brings people or guide you in directions that your meant to hear or do. I'm an empath and have done the work for the past year of self love, and running into your video,assures me that I have made those changes in my life and not ever dealing with a narcissist ever again. Thank you, this is totally true.

I never knew I was an empath...I just found out I was codependent. Now I’m working on detaching and maintaining boundaries.

I find a lot of comfort listening to you. Thank you for all your clear explanations. I really appreciate all your videos.

"Very much like a child" - hit the nail on the head. They remind me of children. (Me, I, my, myself, more?) And if theyre a partner/spouse, the relationship even becomes about their herem ( or side hoes as I like to call it, but I'm very vitriolic). The triangulation is SO annoying!

You are so brilliant. The way you spoke about the cognitive dissonance made me have an epiphany, I had been going through this and was so frustrated with it, I could never find a word for what I was feeling and you just summed it up so effortlessly. Everything you said about examining your inner wounds struck deeply with me as well. I don't know how you do it but thank you for being so brilliant and helpful!

My God this is so eye-opening. I have tried to figure out why I seem destined to attract these people in my life and this is it! Got some work for myself to do but wow- thank you Stephanie!

This is spot on. Specially the part where you mention having boundaries being more important than to recognize the red flags... I've seen the red flags but because of the lack of boundaries I've ended up hurt. It's a lesson also not to be impulsive with sleeping with the guy very soon since we might get emotionally attached to him. All guys have expectations of getting in your pants. The narcissists will hate that you set a boundary, but the right guy will respect that. Thanks for this video 🙌🏻🌺♥️

Thank you for raising awareness about this 💜

Stephanie - the type of woman I'd stare at in line at a Starbucks because she's so attractive, but scared to death to say anything to her...because, ya know what? I'm an empath. lol...I've learned my lesson from times past. But let me say this, reading the comments you can tell many people see relationship issues through their own lens and not holistically. When you do that, you'll never focus on yourself. I had that problem for years. And it took going back to what made me an empath. It had to do with a traumatic experience I saw my mother go through. That's what made me feel I wanted to save the world...hence getting married to a narcissist who kicked me a sob story. Just learn from your mistakes, don't forget what makes you "you", and make the needed changes...even if that means being alone for as long as it takes...and that's something many people won't do because everything is done with time in mind rather than improving the inner person.

I’m going through this in my relationship. I’m always trying to make her happy and nothing seems to help and when I wanna go out without her it’s always turn into an argument, then she keep saying I am selfish. Knowing I do so much and take her out. I’ve always ask myself why I’m going through this. Thanks Stephanie for helping me get through this.

Your channel has been part of my healing self love journey. It's changed my life. Thank you. ❤

Thank you Stephanie!💖 I really needed this today. Sometimes even after we feel we've come so far in our healing and have learned to love ourselves again, we still fear that we aren't enough or haven't learned enough to possibly move on and into another relationship. I really cherish the fact that I'm an empath and an HSP, I didn't even know what those things were before my life kind of exploded because of narcissistic abuse, I just thought I was different than most people and extremely sensitive! All the pain and abuse led to a self awareness and acceptance that I didn't even know was possible before. You have really been a huge part of my healing and renewed self-love. This video made me think maybe I am ready to start dating a little and not be so afraid of attracting another narcissist! Thanks again and God bless😊

Excellent video. It cleared up any doubts I had of my current situation. Thank you.

Omg, you are so right. I finally recognized that I had to care about myself, my sanity, my dignity and my health. I never knew I had unhealed wounds from childhood until an abusive relationship happened to me. But I always knew I was a fighter. And I am taking ME back and the peace I feel in my body and soul are just the beginning 🌹 I had major cognitive dissonance; a total mind warp. I will never take on another’s responsibility for their stuff or try to fix someone. It is God’s job to do that, as well as the responsibility of the other person to RESPECT others! Thank you for your videos.

This is so true about my life right now...Such an Empath that needs to be very aware of Narcissists!

Thank you Stephanie! That was really useful!