Hey everyone my name is Matt. As someone who suffered from Retroactive Jealousy in my relationships for more than 13 years of my life, I told myself if I ever found a way to overcome it, I would dedicate part of my life in helping others do the same. That is what this RU-vid channel is all about. Expect new videos weekly with different techniques, mindsets, and activities to help you overcome Retroactive Jealousy in the fastest time possible :)
Such a bizarre past few days.. getting jealousy and anxiety over stuff that happened 15 years ago and months before we even met.. I asked questions and hated the answers.. I must be losing it.. happy to see I’m not alone
Being obsessed with something in my wife’s past from 15 years ago that was months and months before we had even met! 🤯 something that has no meaning in my life..married 12 years w/2 kids.. And these thoughts are consuming.. will it ever end???
For me I know everything she did in detail and I cannot stop thinking about it. It’s been two years and I can’t ever stop thinking about it every night I can’t sleep and every time i see her I think of it. It’s terrible and it makes me angry inside every time and I can’t stop with this feeling. Can anyone else relate to this???
I met a girl who admitted she had 6 bf before during 9 years of living abroad alone. The number is not too high but the thing is she must've lived with each of them. Just like a marriage. It means she was married to 6 dudes technically. So it's not just about body count. She gave me a kiss on lips first on 3rd date and on 4th date we made out in my car. Usually girls protect themselves when I try to touch breasts or vagina. But she didn't care about it at all and statrted to moan and really enjoy it. She said she really wanna fuck but she's on a period. And its been only few weeks since we dated and she told me her libido is very high. She asked if we can have sex twice a day. I went to her apt but not felt like sex. She was already without underwear. She told me I'm weird because I didn't try to fuck her. She kepts saying I'm different. She asked if I have good hand skills and if we can do 69. All these kind of shits are convincing me that she had numerous casual sexes with her partners and she really has been enjoying her sex life so far without any guilt. She said her first sex was 27. To make it worse, she told me about some of her exs and they were all messed up drunk junkies. So I have to also assume that she doesn't have skills to recognise good and bad guy. She's not considerate. etc. So I'm breaking up with her because I want a life partner but she's not a wife material to me. I've never met virgin in my life so I was kinda expecting it considering her age of 36 but this girl I can't handle anymore. I don't have any love or affection at all for her left. It's just gone.
thankyou so much man, might be one of the most helpful videos i have ever found in my life it cured my anxiety and gave a ray of hope, thankyou so much
I love this. The only thing is that it is true that if any of us sin in any type of way, we are destined for hell. But that is why JESUS forgives ALL of us for our sins, so we can accept the free gift of salvation!
I get accused of trying to get him jealous by using certain words in my text. I get frustrated and tired of explaining that I'm not doing it. He's not reading my text right.
What do u recommend when your partner has a 15 year old daughter with another woman and his family and her family still get along. Do you think it’s possible to overcome jealousy in this situation?
Disgust is the right word - harsh but true. I'm on the same page as most of you here. I never saw my girlfriend the same way again after learning about her past. Sure, she was honest with me (and I'm glad she did), but things were never the same. I can accept if she's not a virgin. But not when she has multiple ex-es. Needless to say, I walked away.
Thank you so much for this video i learned a lot. i'm really possessive and often get jealous when someone talks to my partner I don't want our relationship to be toxic, so i really want to fix myself, i want to overcome this😢
They will tell you it doesn't matter because it is in the past, reality is that it matters so much, that they had to lie and hide it. Be safe and run away
Its quite interesting the fact that she at least recognized her mistake. It certainly makes things a totally different situation and a lot much easier to equalize. How about if she didnt recognize that what she did was wrong?
My partner lied about the number and nature of his past relationships, I found out 1 year after our relationship started. I felt very disgusted when I found out and I would not have been interested in him if I knew these things. But right now, even though it bothers me, it is not a big enough reason for me to break up with this person. I still love him and his past doesn't affect our present but I still can't seem to get rid of the 'disgust'. What should I do?
This is pure gaslighting. Men feel disgusted by female promiscuity for many reasons, and rightly so. First and foremost, they've taken something that is supposed to be reserved and special, and made it casual or for fun. Which is entirely their choice. However, there are many other ways to have fun but not so many other ways to be intimate and bond with a special person, a romantic partner. Once intimacy is detached from sex it's permanent. Relationships are challenging enough. Nearly impossible without the emotional glue that is intimacy. That's a big reason why sexual history is incredibly important. Men shouldn't be shamed because that's how we think. It's our nature.
I see your point but it also sounds like lie to yourself to make yourself believe that you you are still in love with them what If the numb feeing has been going on for years
This is why God tells us to wait for marriage . Both partners. It’s not good for the soul . It may be “natural” to have sex w anyone . But it’s not good for our marriages.
In my case, I’m not jealous of the hook ups he had from the past, Im jealous of the things he did to his past partners and not doing anything better to me. He is only taking and hasn’t shown any giving tendencies replacing it with a personal problems going on in his life. And I get jealous why did his past partners got his efforts for free and I give him everything he wants and still not getting it.
He is teaching simping. Your disgust is not retroactive jealousy. It reflects a gulf in values. If you lose that disgust it means you have lowered your values. That is not something good to teach anyone.
I tried but i cannnttttt and now im js crying n heart broken cuz we’re far apart we cannot see each other and feel each other’s arms while hugging, today she went to her friends house they did there own activities n stuff, her cousin kissed her on her neck ( I couldn’t do any shi n js cried ) and its not the first time! I told her abt it abt how it hurts me when isee such things between her and a FRIEND, “ i love when ur jealous “ she said, but i said it hurts so baddddddddddddddd that im cryingg rn then she said she’ll try not to do these such things But now im not sure if talking to her abt the kissing thing w her girl friend is right!! What do u guys think?????????????? She posted the pic of her and the friends kiss every time when i see it i js cry like now bc i wanna kiss her not anyone else even if its her sis But i think this is bad but pls what can i do? This is how i feeell its so painful i swear😞
been here before dawg. seeing my girlfriend do other things in her own life used to tear me up inside until after this video. did you fully understand what Matt said in this one? your girlfriend does have her own life, and you have yours. pouring all your attention and love into the relationship seems like the right thing to do, but ultimately will just get you jealous and possessive. now your case is a little tough with the long distance thing and her saying "i love when ur jealous", but still, try and be understanding. maybe hop off social media to try and limit your exposure of those pics. its all about how you handle it. its in your mind. dont let your thoughts control you. 8:33 of the video has a really good sentence to help keep you in check. you'll get through it, good luck bro.
It's not jealousy, it's disgust bro. You don't know what she did with that other man and you're mind will mess with you if you have a kid with her and she kisses your kid with that nasty mouth that was on the other man.
I feel like I’m in a loop.. I cant be jealous but every time I try to focus on myself I end up getting bored of the relationship and end up single either way. Then it repeats.
I’m not sure if I am experiencing this. My girlfriend has had sex with one other guy before me and she was my first. I just feel like I also want to experience sex with another person and that it is kind of unfair that she has had this experience and that as long as I am with her I never will
Do it bro, she's at peace because she got it out of her system and you haven't. That's her advantage over you that will make it easy for her to leave you if you start to act in a way she doesn't approve of. Once you see other girls (dont let her find out) you will not fear losing your girl if she tries it.
I’m not sure if this is the problem I am struggling with. My girlfriend has slept with one guy before me and she was my first. I do feel bothered by this fact but maybe more because I also want to have experiences with other girls because she had them too.
thank u for this it really did lift a rock off my chest I was going through a situation of overthinking about her past this only happens when we talk about it but now I’m feeling much better
ALL guys think about it bro, (some deny it) so you know it's a normal thing. You're not jealous, you're disgusted because you don't know what she did with the other guy and now she's kissing you.
“You shall not covet.” Exodus 20:17 You don’t need a man/ woman or materialistic things you need God, and God will give you everything that you need. A man/woman will love you for your physical look/ charisma/ money/ intelligence….. or all the temporary things to fill someone thing that THEY need and will only love you if you meet their needs, but God loves you for who you are, whatever you are and no matter what your past is. In fact, God doesn’t need you, you need Him.. Jesus said: “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” _ John 8:12 “Make every effort to enter through the narrow door, because many, I tell you, will try to enter and will not be able to.” _ Luke 13: 24 “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their lifewill lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it.” _ matthew 16: 24-25 “Be enthusiastic to serve the Lord, keeping your passion toward him boiling hot! Radiate with the glow of the Holy Spirit and let him fill you with excitement as you serve him.” _ Romans 12:11
This is so insight. It helped me see jealousy from the other side. I experienced this kind of jealousy by my ex and it made me feel shameful and insecure. I was planning to lie and hide my past experience even though it was nothing steamy and I'm still a virgin. I am still hesitant about sharing it with my future partner but this video made me realize that a partner who is jealous will be jealous anyways and that's a toxic relationship I don't need. I would appreciate thoughts on being 100% transparent with your partner.
