Hi, I'm Celeste (they/them)! I'm genderqueer/nonbinary/trans as well as aromantic. I document my transition as well as talk about other aspects of my gender and sexuality. I also make videos about mental and physical health, geeky stuff like conventions and cosplay, vegan cooking, vlogs, and all kinds of other stuff I'm into. Subscribe to follow along with my musings and adventures!
ive been wondering, for people who have to travel to get the surgery how long do you stay at the hotel/rb&b? all the good surgeons seem to be a couple hours flight away. do you have to stay till you get your drains/ bandages off? or longer even?
Oh wow - I remember your channel from ages ago when I was first researching nonbinary transition options, now I randomly stumbled upon the channel again while looking for floor desk setups. Hope you're doing well!
I remember your first video where you said "i dont wanna become those people who only talk about gender and sexuality and make everything about it" And here we are. You've become another one of those people whose entire personality and existence revolves around your genitals. Not that i care and neither should you but just pointing out how youve ended up becoming what you didnt want to.
YES! The outdoors is so regulating to me too. Agree on the heat issue. I’m glad I had the chance to move back to Massachusetts from TX. I’m looking forward to switching to a job that puts me outside more. Love the phrase “above my capacity” - thanks for that one :)
the closest i could figure out to "Undoing" camouflage reflexes-moreso the reasons behind them-is deciding what i wanna be private about in terms of talking, in terms of composure (emotional privacy), and in terms of boundaries (social access to me). What's leftover, i make a mental note of when I'm still withholding it for safety reasons. eventually, what i call it ("camouflage", "masking") is less pressing and can just be another mental note mental note doesn't necessarily mean dispassionate
Surgery in a few weeks, AuDHD and mentally preparing for feeling really put off by the body change, so it's a relief to hear it may not be as jarring as I think 😊
i’ve been confused for a while and when i heard the “liking the idea of having a bf/gf” I think i might’ve figured something out i used to think i was bi then pen and now i’m not sure if i’m aroace or panace mmm i’ll figure it out eventually, thanks for the vid:)
Some difinitions first: Asexual refers to people who do not experience sexual attraction toward others, as well as people who experience limited or conditional sexual attraction[2] and relate to the label asexual more than other sexual identity terms. They may experience other forms of attraction, such as romantic, sensual, or aesthetic attraction. Asexuality is a sexual orientation,[3] not a behavior, choice, or medical condition. Some asexual people choose to engage in sexual activities for various reasons despite not experiencing sexual feelings and desire toward any particular person. Asexuality is part of the asexual spectrum (abbreviated "ace spectrum"), an umbrella term and a broad community of identities that are closely related to asexuality when placed on a spectrum ranging from asexual to allosexual. Libido, which means sex drive or the desire for sex, varies dramatically from one person to the next. It also varies depending on a person’s preferences and life circumstances. Libido can be affected by medical conditions, hormone levels, medications, lifestyle and relationship problems. Many new couples will go through an early period of having a lot of sex that then decreases over time. On the other hand, a busy life can leave some people too tired or preoccupied to even think about sex. Unless you are worried about your sex drive or it is causing problems between you and your partner, you do not need to seek professional help. So concluesion: libido/sexdrive and asexuality is two diffent things. you can be asexual with hight libido (hight sex drive, but dont feel sexual attarction), Allosexual with low libido (experience sexaul attraction with a low sex drive) and anything in between. Dont be afraid if you have libido/sex drive as asexual, you are still asexual with a sex drive/libido. I was used to identify as demisexual and bisexual, but now I identify as grey aroace/grevrose, but maybe i am aroace and I have a hight libido.
I've been reading through some of these comments (really nice to see all the cis women with top surgery) and also have watched a few videos on the topic by now. The thing is that I'm not sure if I want top surgery. I do consider myself a cis female rn, but honestly I don't really care about my gender identity, I just want a body I can be comfortable in. I just don't know if top surgery is the right decision bc I don't know if I'm uncomfortable as it is to go that far and if I won't regret it. Like, I don't have a constant hate for my chest. I do want a flat chest, I dislike having breasts, I hate wearing bras (I've started wearing binders over two years ago, but do it less now because it makes my back pains worse. But I think I'm even more hunched over when I'm wearing a bra, idk. And just putting on a binder feels really good in that first moment it makes your chest flat), I didn't want my boobs when they started growing, and there's times I hide my chest from myself under the blanket, idk why. But at the same time I don't hate my breasts. I dislike having them, but it's not hate or disgust and the dislike is also about the fact that I have breasts and not the body part itself if that makes sense. And maybe like 4 months ago, there was a day where I liked the way my chest looked and where I didn't want a flat chest and then that happened again today to some extent. Like I liked how the shirt and the outfit and everything looked on me (including my boobs) but then when I looked at my shadow they just seemed to big somehow? Idk it was really weird and I'm just really confused rn and don't know what I want. So I'm really hoping someone who read this far (thank you btw, I did not mean for this to get so long) can relate and maybe has some input cause I feel like my experience isn't strong enough to be unambiguous...
Thank you for sharing your experience, I think that whole procedure has not changed and you explain it in detail, but how was your experience with the doctor? How did you like her work as a doctor? Today how do you feel about that procedure, did you recover 100%?
Thank you so much for making this video and sharing your perspective. It really helped me. I’ve been struggling with excepting that I’m on the aro spectrum. because I’m like worried I’m not aro enough or some shit like that. what you said really hit the nail on the head for me with sometimes feeling like you want romantic attraction but most/other times just not really seen a point in it. that’s how I feel a lot of the times. Like very occasionally feeling like romantic attraction/romantic relationship might be nice but most of the time just feeling I’d rather just have a queer platonic friend. for me, it was always really hard because I love affection and I want affection, but I don’t really want it a romantic way I don’t think. Like sure I would want to kiss and cuddle someone, but I don’t necessarily see it in a like romantic context if that makes any sense more just like a strong connection/bond that can more be described as like a deep friendship. but yeah that’s just my thought process when it comes to this and I thank you for sharing yours because it really helped me solidify the fact that I am on the aro spectrum :)
I'm only a few minutes in, but I already resonate so much with what you are saying about "masking/camouflaging" not being a deliberate act and how your nervous system automatically responds to situations in order to feel safe. That gives me so much validation to hear a similar experience, so thank you so much for sharing ♥
If you don't mind me asking, how do you deal with dysphoria at obgyns? Every part of the experience just makes me want to cry in a ball but i really need a hysterectomy so im trying to find ways to be more comfortable. Btw im also autistic and nonbinary on testosterone
It definitely helps if you can find a provider who is trans-affirming. Other than for this process, though, I actually just have my primary care doctor do my regular pelvic exams.
My thoughts exactly! It took me 35 years to have an epiphany about marriage and family not being necessary for happiness, and another 6 or so to discover that I'm arofluid! It explains so much! Also, that's a good point about attractions. I always thought many of my interests were romantic because they felt so strong but most of them were actually platonic! I could never reciprocate my feelings to anyone who has been attracted to me and I never knew why until recently. I think you may be talking about aegoromantic, as far as fictional romances--enjoying watching/reading it but not wanting it in real life. I thoroughly enjoy indulging in romantic movies/TV shows/reading, and actually get GIDDY when they get together, but never in real life. And that's enough for me you know? I would never want a romantic relationship simply for the sake of having one. I thought I did but it turns out I don't, and that's ok. Thanks for sharing!
I’m really confused because I think I have a crush on someone, but it’s nowhere near as strong as movies and other people describe it. It’s not an overwhelming, heart stopping feeling, I’m just.. comfortable. Except, while I sometimes like the idea of a relationship, sometimes it also makes me feel weird? But I do want to be with them, they make me happy and they’re a great person. I don’t know if I’ve just convinced myself I like them, I’m actually in love (because I’ve heard it’s actually better to not have that anxiety, it’s a sign of actual love instead of infatuation), or if it’s a problem with me like I’m afraid of romance, or if I’m aromantic and they’re just my best special friend or something. It’s so confusing and I don’t know what the right thing to feel is, all I know is I care about them but like what if that’s not enough and I don’t actually like them romantically? Thank you for the video though, wether I’m romantic or aromantic or something in between, it’s nice to know other people are/have been confused and unsure
Thank you so much for sharing these details!!! I have been searching for an honest description of this transition process to floor sitting. Greatly appreciated🎉🎉🎉
Well, it's hard to define since I don't experience it, but it seems that most people experience a feeling toward some people that they call "romantic" that is distinctly different from how they feel about their friends. For me, the only difference is the intensity of a connection; it's not a different type of feeling really.
I know I am asexuell, but aromantic is a struggle. I am not sure because these "butterflies" I feel for someone for Like 2 weeks and lose it then. Every single time. I want a partner but I never have these really strong feelings
4:18 WOW that part really rang a bell for me. The whole video up to this point was really good and I just sat here listening, kinda opening myself to the idea of that community (i just recently acknowledged that I am aromantic) and then you said this particular thing. I was really romanticly driven when I was younger but then it evolved into, like you said, just day dreaming about dates and not ACTUALLY wanting them to happen in a particular way. Like when I am out with a girl, sure I able to enjoy the date etc, but emotionally I am numb the whole time. It started to feel really weird when I realized that it had nothing to do with people and something to do with what’s inside of me. I’ll watch video to the end but even now I can tell you thank you for posting! You’ve just made me more comfortable with the idea of accepting that I am in fact Aromantic.
best part of floor sitting is you do naturally move more as part of it and I find my body prompts me to move as no longer feel comfortabl I've found a yoga block helpful I've just got a folding kneeling stool which is also good as a table for reading on the floor large hardback book and of course for kneeling
This is great - I started intentionally floor sitting this month and in australia I found a coffee table online from kmart which I am loving and I found that the trick is getting the right height for you with leg room underneath to be able to stretch out and move around freely on floor and not too high a height to be able to work on like you would a desk or dining table Since doing this and floor sleeping my form and technique and amount of weight I can lift doing barbell squats at the gym has improved, increased
It’s weird, I see a lot of other aro people longing and sad that they’ll never experience romance, but I just don’t? I’ve just never been into it for some reason. Granted, I’m a guy, which might have differing effects, since I don’t think I’ve really heard my friends talking about romance, more so sex. I guess part of it too is I’ve felt a lot more pressure to have sex than have a girlfriend.
This isn't something I've had too much trouble with myself. I just saw this video from someone I follow named Zac Cupples, and it might be useful to you (not about floor sitting but sitting in general): ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-ZxVcwtNuk-Q.html
This video was super helpful and informative! I'm actually scheduled for the same procedure at the same hospital next month so this gave me a lot of additional insight that I was not expecting to get
I just had a free nipple raft technique done on me 2 days ago! I look forward to getting the drains off of me!!! I am cisgender female but I wanted very small boobs.
This asexual reminds me of Maria the mother of Jesus. She has no sex, and she excused herself from sexual attraction from angel who come to tell her God message (in handsome form of man). But eventually, despite her being so individual (and only pray ot God everyday until she got fruits from heaven w/o human intervention) in her Chamber and excluded from jews people even society in general, she has deep bonding with Jesus, her son without father (when normal people supposed to have romantic and sex with husband) and finally the day she passed were the saddest day for Jesus. Maybe we just born like Maria preference, we prefer what Maria prefer, even we long for isolation just what she did
definitely in the mode of stacking stuff right now, just to see how different heights work 😅 I think the ideal length of the table is 120cm, with at least 90cm space between the legs, in order to sit under it with a crosslegged position
