13. My ex is dating someone new! 

K.E.V. Same here . Hellllll no

K.E.V. Define long term.

That’s why you call him Or her ex. Ex means ex. They wouldn’t leave in the first place if you were the best person. They looked for something better. They will leave in the future again. If you r the problem he she would t come Back at all. Same applies to dumpee.

Exactly....if they lay down w another then i would not want them back.

Same 🤙

I doubt you'll ever read this comment, but I have to reply to you anyway, because I'm going through this myself. She broke up with me 4 months ago and has been in a relationship with someone new not that long after. My thoughts are these: She's not looking at it the way that you are. She's not trying to go out of her way to hurt you. I'm assuming she doesn't want to be in touch with you (doesn't want to talk to you) and YOU found out she's seeing someone new. What she's doing is for HERSELF only. She is looking out for #1. She wants to find happiness and not have to be alone. She wanted that with you, but for whatever reason, she no longer felt like it was a possibility and so she left you. She didn't do it to hurt you. She did it to take care of her own needs and wants. YES, she hurt you in the process, but she's blocking that out. She's more concerned with her own feelings and well-being now. As for the new guy, well, this is still about HER and HER wants and needs to be fulfilled. She wants to be loved and love and she didn't think you were the one for her anymore and now she has met someone new, with NO history of hurt, or arguments. He is NEW and EXCITING and most probably is treating her well and so she is letting herself become part of a new relationship and again, she is not doing this to hurt you even more. She's 100% thinking about her own feelings and what will make her happy and the prospect of being in a new relationship with this new guy is something she wants to explore and your feelings and my feelings do not matter to her anymore. HER feelings matter and as hard as this is to say (because it's killing me also), is that HIS feelings now matter to her as well, the way yours and mine once did to our ex's. Nothing of what they are doing is directly meant to hurt us, even though it does. It doesn't matter to them. They will not put their happiness on hold so that you don't feel hurt. My ex has been very mean and cold and heartless with me, but that's her way of keeping me away from her and now him. Do I want their relationship to last? HELL NO. Might it last? Yes, it might. What can you and I do? Not much. We have to swallow the pain and distance ourselves from it. Right now, you and I represent a threat to their happiness and getting in the way of a future with the new guy, so you and I have to be smart and keep our distance and let things happen the way they will. We can't force them to leave these new guys, who have the advantage over us. These guys did not hurt our ex's the way we did. They are getting all the love from them that we did and it hurts so much, but the more you show them that, the more you end up pushing them into the guys arms. I found this out 2 days ago and I called and called and she got so scared that she called the police and I got a warning to not call her again. That was extremely hurtful but it just reconfirms that our ex's are only thinking about their own happiness and well-being at this point, not ours. WE have to think of our own happiness so that WE can get stronger and become confident, independent and attractive again, which is something we are not at the moment in our ex's eyes, AT ALL.

carlos cabrera your so right my has a new boyfriend she dumped me a few weeks ago fucking hurts then Rubs it in my face I don't Respond back to her at all but she text me a few days ago hmmm why she doing this?

Its so funny you said that bc thats basically what happened to me and to top it off, my exes new bf's name is carlos lmaoooooo

Dan Maler very well said! It hurts like hell to admit all of this, but everything you said is spot on. Good luck to you.

Dan, how did it ever work out?

How are things now bro?

@@joshuamac6302 update

Experiencing the exact same thing atm. Never felt this heavy before

Hmst keep your head high. I wanted her back so badly, now she‘s back fucking and pursuing me. Attraction level: 8-9/10. work on yourself. She‘s a fucking catch but so am I. Work on yourself and keep faith; everything will fall into place

@@johndaily4263 You're together again with her now? And cheers. It looks like That's the only thing I could do rn.

to tell you the truth, your story is my best case scenario.....i had a decade with my ex, hoping she wake the hell up. as i needed the separation to wake the hell up in my total life too (which i didnt realize till she left). I'm better for the break, but think all my new realizations and ambitions would make for a great life for us. I was lost in stagnation before she left just didn't know it. best and worst thing to ever happen to me

So your saying sometime you have to get dissed to realize the grass isnt green. Then they come back stronger?

@@mzeye sometimes. But most often times it's best to move the hell on and never take them back.

@@greekjoker127 I could just cry and cry and I am crying for nothing. I thought I worked my best but clearly I am still shitty I didn't love him more .give him more time and attention I needed to I wanted to . But I got distracted by my own traveling . I wasn't even having fun and constantly missing him in my travel. He was missing me while I was traveling

So, true

Adhyantoro Kusumo Yess. But I found out that the girl he left me for is 15. Him and I are both adults, lol. So now I feel kinda disgusted by him, that he would date a minor. He's still with her and its been like 3 months.

Has he reached out yet?

John Daily Yes. We have been talking for almost 3 weeks now. He has even came by my house a few times. But he now has suddenly stopped texting and hasn’t spoke to me the whole day and it’s bringing me right back to the sad place I’m at again 😩 plus he still has that girl.

Alina ღ how long did it take him to reach out? Or was it you who initiated contact?

How on earth does Joe from You soothe you🤣

Jamie Holt his voice is relaxing 😂

Omg he does!

I just realized that haha, it took me a while!

He really does

5 years for me... 6 months after the breakup and I see her with someone she’s been telling me about as a “amazing person” -After a wave of emotions, I found the strength to forgive myself for not being good enough because part of me was happy to see her smile while strolling with the other guy. It was enough assurance to know that I did love her enough to let her go. Though the image is forever burned into my brain, it was enough for me to finally reach the acceptance stage that the relationship is really over. still hurts everyday, but no longer waiting for her to talk to me anymore and just ready to move on

Mine after 12 years of relationship following week after She dumped. He moved in to her home. (My kids included). It was funny for me. She couldnt have chosen a more tipical rebounder .

Ugh that shit makes me so mad. Fuck them and fuck their happiness.

@Where did I leave my shekels? yeah... fuck her.... life is lot better for me now...

Women don’t care about you the way u care about them. They love differently. They look at us the way we look at jobs. It’s NOT malicious. They have no idea. They’re not bad people. Theyre just wired that way. He’s better (in her mind) than you. That’s it. Simple. Improve and get a younger chick. And for fucks sake do NOT get attached to the new one.

You're so welcome!

Update?

My ex messaged a girl on IG the day after... so I get ya.

Dreambignow my ex cheated signed a lease with me and left me for someone else and also had sex with the guy and came back to me , so now his talking to everyone he broke up with or that likes him along time ago . I’m 4 days into no contact . :(

You may have been a little too harsh on her. She probably started dating another guy because most likely the thought of moving on from you sounds impossible to her and needed a rebound guy to take her mind off you. She probably loves you very much. I know cause I'm a girl and I have considered getting a rebound guy simply because I couldn't get over him. I get it if you don't want her back but instead of saying just that, you said many unnecessary things. She'll move on easier after this though so you kinda did her a favor.

She was with him behind your back my guy.

Rosemarie_Fit ghosting somebody is a very cowardly thing to do, and I question your ex's ability to have a healthy relationship if this is how they deal with situations! Otherwise at the moment there is nothing that you can do short of continuing no contact and working on yourself! Sorry that happened to you.

U can't. Move on. The right person for you that really loves you won't leave u.

@Where did I leave my shekels? lol yeah. I say do what you gotta do to move on so long as you're not being petty (ie. Sleep with their friends, get friends to ask about them, etc.). Because they will get a word of it. Do what's in your best interest if it's for your own good in the long run, even if it means blocking them so you aren't tempted to check their social media presence.

Jaylene Flores I'm glad I was able to help!

I broke up with my ex last week Today she got a new boyfriend i feel so lost, it's painful to see her doing the same things that we were doing together :''((

@@OddNadir same here bro, my ex gf have someone new after we broke up, she even said sorry to me because it would hurt me. I try to not care in front of her but actually its destroy me, after 3yrs she just left me like nothing ever happen

@@wikyindriyana6855 it's sooo freaking hard I spoke to her today asking how is she..... she was acting like i never met her she was a whole different person I'm was speechless how could she move on from me so easily It hurts more that she found love again while there was nobody for me to support me i'v been alone for three weeks no one even tried to help me

@@OddNadir I heard that he has been with some one for more than a month after 40 days NC and today it’s 75 days NC , I saw his WhatsApp profile picture is with her .. it hurts like hell 5months 10 days post break up .. I just wish myself won’t feel so pain anymore as( I deleted him 75 days ago) but now I just blocked him so I can distant myself better from him instead of hurting myself again and again

@@gaoang3391 I blocked her out of everything so far so good, but i truly miss her. I hope you doing great buddy 💕

Why do you want to loose him for good ? My pain only come when I call and speak about things that have happen , I starting to realize that. , have you do e mo contact

Thomas Ruston does it really happens? I feel like I am going through something like this and broke up with my girlfriend last month. It hurts so bad but for the long run it would be good for me. She is already in a relationship right after 2 weeks I broke up with her. Life is just crazy.

@@madbot4123 yes it happens . Mine happened in like 3 days . I am still taken aback by the kind of mistreatment and they leave us in a precarious position. But trust me , give yourself time to heal. It will help for sure .

Thomas Ruston this is my case my ex was already seeing this new person months before our breakup and that’s the mean reasons for the breakup. My ex left me for the other person 😂

It’s monkey branching... 5 years I was with my man, a few weeks ago he tells me he’s reconnected with his ex from 12 years ago and he left me for her. Fuck this

@@shivajichatterjee30 update?

lezar ravlam who did the break up ?

lezar ravlam how have you been holding up?

Only if she tells you let just be friends all you need to do is say no.

Ruthy Pineda hey just move on, or how are things now? And btw I have that same last name haha

Seems complicated, but not impossible.

That's just evil behaviour, block her immediately

Have a similar story. He acts as if I he’s the victim- the one who’s most hurt. I don’t know about that, but I do know that I never wanted to break up with him in the first place. He was the one who told me he didn’t want me anymore and I felt so suffocated from trying to reach someone who wasn’t interested in me anymore. Hurts like hell, especially since he messaged me 5 months since the breakup, a little more than a month since our last contact, that he’s found someone new and wanted us to be friends. I refused. I was already moving on pretty well and now I feel like I’m back to square one. It’s okay. I know things will be better. Maybe not now, but I’m trying to be hopeful and excited for what the future holds. We’ll get through this. Time is our friend.

Good.

Beauty Eclipse really? Then why are you here, commenting?

Because I am still going through a break up. Just because I am moving on and have done my morning doesn't mean I am not still processing it like anyone else here.

Update?

Hi there. Just visit my website for coaching: www.thelovechat.net/coaching

My ex-fiancee is now dating someone after six months. I think the only thing we can do now is focus on ourselves and do our best to move on. They definitely don't love us.

wow, it relates much to my case. can you tell how the rest of your story?

Any update?

my girlfriend broke up with me and two weeks later she already in a relationship with another guy 😢 5 years down the drain...my heart hurts so bad!

It is not about being strong I should stop watching this kind of be videos

I'm 8 mo in and just go the terminal speech, you at the right time . Save it by no contact i wish I did.

Ana Soti 11 months after the breakup?

How long were you and your ex together? Also how long was it between your ex and their previous relationship before you started dating?

The Love Chat they broke up about 3 years before I met her because he had to leave the country and she realized he has been cheating on her several times. We were 3 & a half years together but when he came back just a week after she broke up with me and go back with him. So I'm confused Leonardo from El Salvador THANKS A TON.

Leon Mercado If she ever came back to you she would do it again. Unless she fully commits like marriage. I'm 3wks post break up and it hurts like hell, she had a guy lined up months before and is in the honeymoon phase, high up in the clouds. Imagining she is dead to me is helping me move on.

dimi caimano i think u shouldn’t contact her again if she is already seeing someone else. Keep working on urself and stay in no contact.

If she speaking to ex that she had history with and memories. You was her rebound. Clearly she still has feelings and love for ex and wants to explore that.

Omg I'm going thru the same. Do u wanna talk about it

Update?

@@alextheneko I'm over him now he is too childish. We're just friends i stopped having feelings towards him now hope you have sorted out your realishionship.good luck 💖

@@FM-zg5hz i did the 30 no contact and i felt better withought him. I have no more feeling towards him. We're just friends now xx

In that case leave them alone....

How long was your relationship with him?

Same happened to me today. Stay strong . We got this , I talk to my friends and it made me 10x times better. I got everything out , and now i'm hanging on . Go out and run , let it out. We got this

@@F52xxx updates

@@gone684 The biggest enemy is social media. I'm a big stalker usually so when we broke up I was always checking her social media. The first time she posted something with her new boyfriend destroyed me. I started doing no contact , stopped stalking her and ended up with the mindset of (I need to work on myself because even if I was with her , it wouldn't work). None of that was easy .An ugly and long breakup period , Few oopsies along the way , few texts ,few calls. It's my first time living this so I can't blame myself nor her for all of this. Time is your biggest enemy in the short term but in the long run , he's there to back you up. Months have went by and i'm honestly doing fine , almost fully healed. The only reason I would think about her is because I don't have somebody else in mind.

Same issue here can’t tell if it’s a rebound or monkey branching.

Ashley both

Women are more emotional whereas men tend to be more logical, she was saying what she was feeling in that moment. That can change at any time! Leave her alone, go no contact, and focus on improving yourself!

The Love Chat what if a man says so ??

Same. We tend to not be stable when saying something so negative like that

The Love Chat even if she got dead seriouse that she wants a guy from her country in the near future who agrees to her demands?

Everyone says a lot of things and we can never really know if it’ll really go through I use to tell my friends I’d never date this one girl and a year later we got together so male female it doesn’t really matter you shouldn’t be focused on these things just live your life to the best and things will fall together

Just visit my website: www.thelovechat.net/coaching

Been there . Stay strong that's it . They leave us for someone else as if we never mattered to them . They may or may not come back but someone will

Yeah but i live with them. I see him everyday. Theyre not official but they've been hanging out a lot lately and its killing me.

@@alejandraramirez8408 trust me on this . My ex has been seeing a guy , it has been happening and now I am making myself strong as the day passes . I know the feeling because the time that was at one time ours is gone , it's been given to someone else . We are facing it but once we get strong and if and when they try to come back it's on us , for when we needed them they didn't care about us then in future why should we either . Take care of yourself and stay strong

@@shivajichatterjee30 how.long have your ex and the new guy been together for now ?

@@alejandraramirez8408 Hi , Good Morning !!! It's been 2 months now . We broke up on 5th June , by 12th she already had him

Rebound is just a sad term for people who still want their broken relationship hoping that it will last but the fact is the other person didn't love u as much as they said they did .or their love has expired. Then they will leave .

Stay strong..she made a huge mistake leaving you for someone with bagagge( aka his children) she will regret it when she will be the last priority in his dude's life..single dad's are the worst to date.. he may be rich and tricked her into his life.. otherwise why on earth a sensible childless woman would deny the prospect of having her own family and chose to join a ready made family..?? Stay strong and remember your value..this too shall pass

@@pm5095 thanks for support brother, but the thing here is that he's not single dad. He's still with his wife and only using her for sex. But I agree that she's a fool. To my surprise my gf is ok with all that.

@@subyawana hope you're doing well, my situation was similar, but the guy is a single Dad who also has two kids, she left me because I was having issues due to the Covid quarentine and I was going through a hard time financially. That guy has a nice job and now can give her what I couldn't give that moment. We were also engaged for one year.

@@gbrl89 yes brother I’m doing pretty fine. And it’s good that you got to know about her real side..I pray that you recover fast n i can assure you bro that you will be a happier person in future. Stay strong bro

I've coached some cases where an ex came back a year later. You never know! Stick to working on yourself and get back into meeting new people! Who knows if someone you fancy even more might come along.

The Love Chat ive been dating other woman but when i met my x it was a glorious time it took me 6 years to find someone.

Klint Kwiecien it's been a whole year my ex wife dumped me. I gave up on her coming back but as much as I want, for attachment reasons, hope doesn't want to die. I failed no-contact for 8 out of the 12 months of the year..lol every time pushing her further away by wrongfully accusing her of going out with even facebook guys for I seeing them just hitting "likes" too much on her pics..😂😂 now, I gave up..😢😢

And what if they've been dating the other person for close to a year now?

Any updates ?