3 Reasons INFJs are Hard to Impress 

However, when we are taken by surprise it is almost unreal! It stops us, causes us to do a double take & creates a sense of aliveness in us. (Like it creates a feeling that is a memory) that can be re-visited & is cherished♥️

This video surprised me in its validating nature. Definitely another reason I can feel like an asshole as an INFJ. My Ni and Ti have tracked/felt the "missing piece" way early on so I often find it hard to celebrate when people get excited by new information or discoveries. I guess I'd say that what surprises me most is when a part of my Ni vision becomes reality. How self-absorbed!

This i one of the main reasons I usually explain why I had a hard time making friends. People thought I "don't get it" when they say something interesting or impressive, in reality I just found it unimpressive, and found it hard to pretend like I"m impressed when I'm not. And it's hard to find things in common, or at least conveying that I"m interested in something to other people when seeming never impressed by anything. And the main reason is the third reason noted in this video, the feeling that I can predict everything because everything is already put in a box by Ni, so everything seems like the same thing over and over again, just a bit different variation. It feels like a life where nothing ever is truly new or impressive.

Ren, That explanation was great! So on point. The last reason was so surreal! I sometimes pretend to be impressed when someone tells me something because I don’t want them to think I’m a know it all… I am older so recently I’ve been trying to be ok with sharing myself(my Ni self) with others after reading your book( The Ecstatic Soul) but I sometimes worry about what others might think…it’s this weird feeling that whatever they are telling me was already so obvious so I’m unmoved. I always wondered why I felt that way 🤔🤔🤔

Yep, most things are definitely reminiscent of something we have experienced or contemplated before. Even when something does impress us, we must percolate it through our internal world, whether we expand the thought or just explore the reality of the new or interesting idea itself, and how does it apply to relationships, life experiences, or future formation and integration into our existing moral compass and framework.

I think you were pretty accurate Ren, particularly with #3; we have that holistic/holographic mind that almost immediately does a gestalt integration of the new data; the one thing that pissed my 2nd (ISTP?) wife off the most was my using the phrase "I know" - because I did. It all integrated almost instantaneously. I was aware. Only a few times did I honestly say "I did not know that" or "that caught me unawares". What's hilarious is she's raising my youngest - supposedly away from my 'bad' influence' ("i do not want her to think being like you is OK") - and do you want to know what SHE says all the time? I'm pretty sure what her MBTI will eventually show...

We are always looking to improve things. If I can't improve it, then I'm impressed, but that is so rare. Most people do the bare minimum to pass.

As an INFP, I am super impressed! lol. 😂 I am wondering about the benefits of contrasting styles of INFJ vs. like an ENFP. You mentioned The Wise Person idea of being almost non-reactive outwardly. I tend to think of non-reactive calm states as being associated with real genuine status and stability, so perhaps it contributes to the idea of INFJ being a source of wise counsel. Where as Ne tends to try to spread outward enthusiasm, like an excited kid, to get everyone energized and involved in a shared thing. *Now wondering if Ne-doms love the challenge of finding a way of framing something in a manner that an Ni-Dom has yet to consider. Or maybe that applies to all N-types. As an INFP I don’t really think about being impressed, but I do wish to be awed and deeply moved, often by the beauty from another. I especially like seeing when people are “in their element”, really making a contribution towards the whole: When it seems like people are operating from their core psyche, and in a manner that is fitting or appropriate for the context or situation… I often find myself in awe. I am probably really deeply moved when someone’s humanity really starts showing.

Good vid Ren, you are onto some good stuff. Looking forward to the new book. Happiest New Year to you and your family😀😀

This is great! Thank you.

Well explained in an Ni Fe way. I totally agree, I am hard to impress, because : _The surface, details, materials are not important, mean nothing and will be destroyed one day or another by time, it's temporary. ex : I can see a large, muscular or armed man, authority figure... (In the essence, they are like everyone, just a soul & temporary life with weaknesses, they don't worth more than any other living being, and also every living is as much important) The devaluation of Se. _(Ni)The detachment & the ability to understand, analyze the thing/situation from all points of views. Not impressed/shocked when we understand. Being so detached at the point that almost nothing impress us. _(Ni) The pattern recognition : I notice the essence. meaning, cause/consequence, concept, pattern.. Pattern, that I have already seen before, in the past, somewhere else. Pattern already present in our mind. It happen the same patterns/events at different times & place/space. It happened a similar event/pattern in the past, and I know/understand what produced this result, the cause. ex: a car crash. And I am not surprised ex : when I watch sportive performances, I am not impressed : I think it"s not hard, that everyone who put effort in and training can arrive at the same result. They practiced, worked hard for it, and there is a result. I'm not surprised, because I imagine well what they did, know how it work. _We need to see a new pattern to be impressed/surprised. I think more the time pass, harder it is to find a new pattern, and to impress us. Fun fact : In my computer, there is a script I began in September called "INTJ not impressed" 😆 In a similar way : Hard to make an Ni dom happy. I agree : Fe bring Se (INFJ), and Te bring Se (INTJ) in a healthy way. I was thinking : INFJ, explain Ti things, in an Ni Fe way - INTJ explain Fi things, in a Ni Te way.

INFJ is all or nothing, we can be so in tuned and focused or we can be so detached and isolated. I respect all and love all, but depending on the behavior of others it diminishes, instead of replenished. What causes me to door slam is one, contempt or degrading me (coz we forget ourselves sometimes just to show love and be accepted), disloyalty (coz when we start we see no end we are already thinking of how we can include the person in the future, though its a slow process) spiritual belief (we operate on the essence of people, almost like a soul connection that's what we crave coz we think of d big picture, meaning, purpose, life, death, love, all d abstract things)

I guess that’s why I keep listening to Kanye West’s music😂