Not to sound so advertised but honestly after you emailed me back about me letting my ex know to stop toying with me and if he wanted anything serious to contact me. He seriously messaged me back to meet me up within two weeks. This was back in Jan and now since April we have gotten engaged. And we plan to wed in fall! Seriously thank you for being there in my time of need and being my voice of reason through my break up. I can’t thank you enough.
It breaks my heart how many people in pain there is on this channel and many others, the worst part is that the people you loved and trusted the most are who put you in this pain!!
After being heartbroken i came back to tell you. The pain wil go away, The memory's will fade, the crying wil stop. You move on. It took me 3 full years to recover fully.
4 year relationship. I'm on day 27 of NC and I want to die every day. I wish this was a nightmare and I could just wake up but I wake up every morning and the reality hits me that this is really happening. This is the worst pain I have ever been in.
@@danielosmon I genuinely wish the best outcome for you, dude. I am on on day 43 of NC now and things are still the same. They say it gets better but I still cry every day and nothing helps. I hope you are doing better.
@@jessiepalermo7234 I'm struggling really bad. The worst part is I run my own business. Everything with my work has been suffering as well. I keep telling myself I'm going to eventually find someone much better but I'm not feeling it. In fact, I feel like a loser because the guy she left me for appears to have everything going for him. I have anxiety attacks every morning. Today is the first day I haven't teared up since I found out about her new man. I know even if she came back to me, it would never be the same. Therefore I feel I have absolutely no choice but to let her go forever. And its extremely difficult but I've been through this before with two other women that I also loved with all of my heart. The difference with this one, is she is the prettiest with the highest level of education. It's going to be a major challenge to find another woman like her or better. Wish all the thoughts of her and her new guy would stop. That's without a doubt the hardest part for me
@@danielosmon I moved in with her and I had never done that with anybody before. We were basically married but without the contract, and she was the one i was going to marry anyway as soon as or financial situation was steady. I was going to have kids with her and be with her forever. I wanted that and I thought she wanted it too. I have had heartbreaks before and they were hard but this has hit me the hardest ever as well. I lost my job due to the corona bullshit and I have been unemployed for a week and I have bills coming up and I don't have the will to do anything. I keep saying, "I'll do it tomorrow when I feel better" but I never feel better. I have not talked to my ex since the NC so idk if she has been with somebody else but I don't want to know. I always think of the worst though and it destroys me internally so much. This has been so traumatic that I developed a fucking tic. My body spasms whenever I think about her, so this happens throughout the day maybe like 80 to 90 times a day. I've had it for a few weeks now. What gets me through at certain points is realizing that she doesn't have the ability to keep me for me to become a better version of myself. You can upgrade yourself and your life in soooooo many different ways and she can't impede you from doing that. If you become an AMAZING version of yourself, life will have no choice than to give you a new love. Somebody is going to notice you someday. I know this sounds hard to believe and I find it hard to believe at times as well but it only makes sense. If you upgrade the fuck out of yourself, any woman out there would be lucky to have you. I'm 6 months into the breakup and I still cry every day. I actually just finished crying right now, I feel like such a loser. But I weighed 300 pounds at the time of the breakup and I have lost 43 pounds since then. The gym has been the only thing that temporarily relieves the pain so I have been there as much as I could. Please use this pain as fuel, dude. We are in no shape to become romantically involved with anybody anyway because our heart is in shreds, so the best we can do is use this time to upgrade ourselves while our broken heart repairs itself. Suffer to succeed. To conquer you must suffer. Pain is not the enemy.
@@pdthinks No :( It has been over 100 days and nothing. She doesn't care. If she did, she would have reached out already. I genuinely hope everyone else waiting for their ex has better luck than me.
I was dumped in March and I did all the chasing for months. I also worked on myself during this time and continue to make changes to myself that I love, I've been in no contact for 4 weeks and it's been much healthier for me .I still miss and love her a lot but I stick with NC. She has dated 2 guys but they both lasted 4 weeks...she is on the same dating site as me but still hasn't found someone...not sure if she is on this site to find someone or tease me.
Nah we didnt get back together. She just used me to comfort her cause she broke up with the guy she left me for lmao. Taught me not to worry about women so much, Dont let her be the center of your universe, you have to focus on the things that make you happy as an individual.
If anyone is hesitant about having a Skype session with Rory, please know that is was worth every penny! I loved his advice, and he truly is the most genuine coach on RU-vid!
Trust me, trust the coaches, you DO NOT want your ex coming back because of your logic, or manipulation, or guilt tripping them or coming back to nothing has changed( And yes they will be able to tell) or ANY OTHER REASON other than that it WAS THEIR IDEA. Because of it's their idea to come back and they WANT to come back then you have solid ground to worth with. Otherwise they will just leave again, quickly, and this time IT WILL be for good. Don't get impatient(easy for me to say right? I've been there) Use every precious moment of no contact to work on yourself and to build something for them to comeback to! ONLY then will you have something lasting. GL and don't get in too much of a hurry.
I know most of these comments telling us to keep no contact and saying it'll be better in time is looking like nonsense to you now, but trust me it really will be alright. I've had a breakup last year and I was basically gone for 6 months at least, I couldn't sleep regularly, woke up crying, didn't want to wake up, didn't eat regularly and I didn't enjoy anything I did, everything reminded me of her, literally even a song on the radio that had nothing to do with her. No contact works either way, because you get to move on, don't think of it as suppressing your emotions, you are only controlling them. I didn't even delete any of the text messages I had with her until one day I woke up and felt ready for it. I'm very cursed when it comes to remembering dates such as birthdays etc. I can't forget them easily, but last week was her birthday and I just remembered it now, even had to check my calendar from a year ago to see if I was right. You won't realize its working until one day you get this sudden realization that life goes on and you already moved on. I got cheated by her, didn't know until after we broke up and I found out from a common friend we had later on, and I was devastated. I spent 6 months waking up, forcing myself to work, getting through the day just to come home and have 15 mins to cry and hours to think of life. Our wounds heal eventually, and although this sounds impossible now, I can't tell you how different it feels coming here after a year and watching the same video with an understanding way different than the one I had. I realized I moved on for sure today, saw her on a cafe I liked a lot the other day and felt a bit nostalgic, but it was just a memory to me, it didn't reach me cause I didn't allow it to. Faith for all, questions for older men :-) Best of luck to you out there, trust in time and yourself ❤️
Your voice is so soothing that it heals most of my pain that I'm dealing w.r.t. my recent break-up...and your advice are extremely positive as well as effective...Thank You for existing a helpful channel like this in my dark times... 🙂👍
It's not a one size fits all scenario. It depends on a lot of factors. Whether or not they actually loved you or considered you just a friend is one factor. Everyone is different. Some are stubborn or have too much pride to reach out. How pissed they are as well.
Yay!! New video!! I always listen to your videos before I sleep, Rory 😊 Your channel has helped me through my breakup especially in the beginning when I had lots of anxiety and stress and was basically a nervous wreck. I've come to terms with the breakup now assuming we won't ever get back together. Because of that I am able to accept my ex's friendship without the pretence of trying to get him back. Nevertheless, I still like listening to you for future purposes 😊
i’ve done a week of no contact so far. i’m doing it for myself so i can heal. i love my ex but i don’t think i ever want him back since he broke my heart and left me. i just want the satisfaction of him knowing that he made a huge mistake.
We are brought up to believe that telling the truth is the right thing to do so when we split with someone we automatically want to reach out and tell that person what we feel in order to keep them. So when we are told to go no contact it’s a scary thing to contemplate. In my experience it’s the best way to either get them back or get over them and move on. Take this time to concentrate on your goals but do not allow yourself to make your ex a goal. Focus your energy on yourself, your family, your friends and your career. If she or he wants you then they’ll come looking.... But if they don’t... trust me you won’t even notice because you’ll of found a new love.... YOU ❤️
after 3months apart and we are in ldr.my ex gf started dating her ex bf(6yrs) before me.this no contact rule is really help me to be better and to regain my self esteem.its a hopeless situation if I win her back ,so better move on and improve myself more.hope she made a good decision.thanks rory for motivating me through your videos.
She broke up 3 months ago because she doesnt love me anymore. We have been together almost 6 years. Doing NC for 54 days now. I think she will never reach out...
@@Jairiv99 Holy Sh... That was 4 years ago. Hi Omar, now i can say, YES, she reached out to me 8 months after she broke up with me. She wrote me a letter by hand . I did not reply !!! 6 Months after the break up I found an amazing woman, we fell in love and as i am writing this comment we are enjoying our vacation in Norway. Stay strong and do not reach out for her. If she does, do not reply. Think about it. Something wasnt right in the relationship. Live your life my brother 😎
Me and my ex broke up almost one year ago. I live in Europe and he lives in Japan. We have been in no contact for 8 months now but he never reached out. He still has lots of my things at his place and his friends, who are actually no my friends since I saw them just a couple of times, always watch my instagram stories, like my pics and sometimes they even texted me to ask me when I'm gonna be back in Japan ( I'm gonna move there after my master degree, which mean pretty soon). We lived together for one year and then we had a ldr for 2 years. Honestly I don't know what to think. He never told me he doesn't love me anymore even if I kinda forced to say it clearly in case it was the reason of our separation. But nothing. I'm still in his friends chat group but, obviously, I don't text anything since I feel like I'm an outsider. I don't even know what I feel at this point. Sometimes I think I got over him . Sometimes I suddenly start crying thinking about us. I'd like him to text me but, maybe I don't even want it. I hate being so confused even after such a long time.
she broke up with me and I didn't want it and I asked her could we work it and she said she just wants to be single so I accepted it and told her have a good one then. I didn't tell her to contact me if she ever wants to or any of that. is that bad I didn't say that? she watches all of my snapchat and instagram stories... I mean just the week before she was all over me and planning our future. this is one breakup that's confused me
This question is about rebound relationship, if we've been broken up for 3 to 4 months and my partner got into a relationship after that time period, is it still a rebound relationship? Thanks :)
Today I started to count, it is the 54th day and I am okay :) Of course i miss her, but i started to date, also in training from the start. Keep moving on, que sera, sera :)
My ex said he hates me, mean things to me, harsh cruel words. Like saying never coming back or wanna do anything with you. Force me to delete everything about him. Do i have a chances? I feel really hopeless . Please help me
@@ioeuropaganymedkallisto7204 I actually got over him and the relationship, he started coming back to me in September, I almost gave in but I figured I deserved better as I had already moved into a new relationship I was trying out. Fast forward that relationship ended, that ex was still around and is still around, he wants us back badly but I just don't want him any more, he taught me how to live without him Nd I figured I deserve better. Love from South Africa 🇿🇦 💖
@@thelmamurungweni2107 wow sounds great! Thank you for sharing this experience with me. I want to do the same with my ex in case she reaches out. It is ultimate karma when the dumper chases the dumpee, but the dumpee does not want to be in a relationship any longer.
P D Yes she did We are in good positive communication We even flirt and have gd banter together I actually let my guard down a few weeks ago We had a gd meaningful chat The door is open 👍🏻 She’s doing an indirect/Direct approach She’s not showing her cards but I know she doesn’t want it ended 😄
Me and my ex didnt have contact for more than 2 weeks now, but she still tries to get contact with me in her community chat when i am around but we didnt talk for 2 weeks in DM's now. The last thing i told her was that i am no longer sad about what happened between us and im thinking more about the positive times that we had in our relationship now. And the last thing i said to her was that i only came back because i want her. And she hasnt replied to that so i stopped talking to her completely and moved on. But what does it mean that she is still making some contact with me on her community chat now after 2 weeks of no contact? Does she do that because she wants me to contact her first or should I still wait for her to initiate first?
Hey Rory! What if you didn’t tell to contact when they changed their mind at the time we broke up? It’s been 2 months since we broke up and I did no contact
5 months no contact, I haven't said a single word to my ex since. He recently started following me on Instagram and viewed a few stories but I haven't given any sort of response. If he doesn't try to get back to me then I will continue with no contact.
Today was 4 months of no contact for me. I did not wish her a happy birthday a few weeks. Ironically, both her friends started following my instagram stories heavily thereafter.
Since there were commonalities, I thought it would be more useful to reply there, then to post an entirely new comment. Personally, I thought it may assist other viewers who may be looking for similar accounts.
You know you say in some of your videos is to do something when you feel like texting I just play one of your videos you have a carming voice make you chill out and remember let her miss you it's a gift lol
Hi Rory, me and my ex broke up about 3.5 months ago. At the start he said he'd always be there to talk. We communicated for about 1.5 months then i broke off contact abruptly because i was sick of being stuck in no man's land. I've since done 2 rounds of 30 day NC.They were both broken by my ex contacting me towards the end, asking me how i am/ if i am ok. Lately he said he'd found out that i had x problem (through social media and by asking a mutual friend), and said he would always be there to talk if i wanted to. Yet he hasn't explicitly said he wants to get back (which i believe is the case for now). Due to this, I've been keeping my replies to him brief and civil. What should I do? I know he cares enough for me to reach out time and again, but he stops short of reconciling and it bothers me alot. However, having to suppress my need to communicate with him (despite his overtures) is wearing me down. I am also going through an especially tough period in my life and feel tempted to accept his offer to talk. What is he thinking and is there any way i can progress this? Thanks for your help.
Lisbeth A hi how are you now? Im in the exact situation, and though i know my x cares for me he didnt talk about getting back together. I wonder how are you now? I hope much better. It gives me hope that i will be ok soon too. :( im struggling not to reply with his messages. He knows that i was devastated and i lost my job maybe thats why he checks up on me from time to time.
yeah u right if I never get my ex back I can aways find someone who will be Happy to have me and like me for me even kown my ex did not went me some body would
hello good sir , hope all well i have a question so i posted my normal happy moments like party's and fun stuff not all of them because i did not wanted to show off or just putting them in for her but on one day i had putted a good girl/friend on my fb story and from that day she did not come and see my stories anymore did i hurt them or fucked up all my work
Does it continue to work if your parent contacts them? (Three times). I have blocked them on all social media as well. She was willing to doing everything the relationship had but she wanted to be promiscuous.
Problem for me and my ex, is we still live together. We share an apartment with three other roommates. Fortunately, since she broke up with me and immediately started dating her “friend”, she has been staying over at his place alot. So I have to find a way to do a modified no contact.
I wish there is some pill that I can forget about him and get rid of this pain....I've never been immunized by this heartbroken pain... Break up/non contact have been 2 months but I'm still in so much pain. I hope I can come back to update the NC success story soon...
My ex message me that I'm still important and always will be to him and that he didn't care anybody more than he cares for me. But he is talking now with other girl. What does it mean?
Before this i had been friends with my ex this whole time, only not talking to him. Except for a period of maybe 3 weeks (after I had already not spoken to him in a month and a half prior) where I had talked to him, though infrequently and not every day but I had slipped up and told him I missed him. I always dropped it after I had said things but I still questioned him. Wasn’t every day and he was never angry at me but I just told him yesterday that I wouldn’t like to be friends and he can let me know if he changed his mind. Made me very anxious but I feel glad it’s over and I think I can feel more comfortable moving on, no matter what happens. I was just prolonging the pain.
Hey rory, if my friends goes to her friends, do i go over and talk to everyone except for her? And she likes this other guy around 2 weeks after our break up and does not seem desperate or forcing anything, does that still count as rebound ? Should I try to avoid seeing her at school ?
What if she dumped me 5 months ago, but we talk on the phone about 3 days a week as "friends" is it too late to go no contact? She's still single, and she knows I want her Bach, but I never mention it.last time we spoke, a week ago, I said to her, call me sometime if you want. Haven't called or texted her since. Is it too late?
ive listen to you before i sleep..im dong NC now but my wife texted about my 2 kids financial support..i did not reply but instead i went to her mother house where we lived before and sleep there for 1 night to bond my 2 kids and leave the money to my kid to hand over to my wife..Did I break NC mode?
I went into no contact for 2 months, reached out asking to hang out and he said he didn’t think it was a good idea. No contact I feel like made my situation worse because we were talking after the break up. I feel like I dug the hole even deeper. Initially after the breakup he said he was leaving the door open to us then when I reached out months later, he said he didn’t think we were good for each other. What do i do in my situation? I feel like I made it worse
I didn't know why, when I started the no contact rule she started to post emotional,anger post although she repost a different situation ,and theres a music video with a caption even pleading cant save us. I dont know what to do we are almost 5yrs in our relationship and we have a strong foundation before, then suddenly she said that she was not happy anymore in our set up. do you think if I continue the no contact rule there will be a chance for us?
Hi! Suppose you are dumped by surprise and say never contact me again, do not talk to me in the street. It was emotional and upsetting a d the words pour out because you are so hurt. Will the ex be less likely to contact you especially when you have gone silent since the break-up?
Hi Rory, thank you for another video! It’s been 3 mos no contact & he hasn’t reached out at all & I think he’s dating, or messing around with the woman that had a crush on him the whole time we were together & he lied to me about. His self-esteem is very low & he has great difficulty going into a deeper love to beyond the honeymoon phase. We were together a year & a half. I wonder if he was in lust with me or love with me. He says he loved me & we were crazy about each other but I wonder if it was just surface deep the whole time & I was fooled. I still believe in our potential and love him wholeheartedly. What do you suggest that I do at this point?
It seems you already know the answers to your questions. You mentioned he has low self esteem and has difficulty getting past the honeymoon phase of a relationship. Some people just don't have the skills to enter a long term deep committed relationship. He needs to work on himself before he could ever get back together with you. It doesn't mean he wasn't in love with you, but his fears and insecurities prevented him from going further. I know it's extremely sad but it's the harsh reality. Don't wait around. You deserve better.
can you talk about rebound relationships? My ex girlfriend dumped me and got a new boyfriend just days later. (was a normal friend of her, they met 1x with friends and I guess they chatted a little bit) So it seems like it works pretty well for them. I was with her for 2 years. Happy/bad times. SO just a normal relationship
they together for 2 months now.. and she is testing the hell outta him like she did with me ... "sexy pictures" "following male friends from the past" and so on... so funny
poor guy, since the break up im on strict no contact and blocked her everywhere. 2 days ago she posted 2 sad pictures on her blog ("i never stopped loving you. hope you are doing well") she is a narc .. poor guys .. finally im free!
I had a little fight with my bf and I think that I was wrong he said do what you want and he said that I am always complaining I didn't respond and I was online the day after he blocked me i texted him in insta i Saïd that i didn t wanna fight with him thats why i didnt respond he Saïd okay and then he stopped responding and he didn t unblock me what should i do ?? and it means that we broke up ..
Can you do a video if your the one who broke it off, then wanted them back & they were also open to the idea of working things out but now changed their mind because they took the breakup hard & resent you & are upset with you, now they say they don't know & say they have doubts & ask for time. What do you do?
It’s been 3 months of no contact. A couple weeks ago, I began writing a reflection letter that I intended to just write for my thoughts. But I was thinking of sending it to the ex as a life update...After watching this, I’m starting to think it’s a BAD idea. Especially since I followed your advice before initiating no contact - telling her that I don’t accept the friendship and to call me if she changes her mind.
My ex broke up with me two months ago. He did it out of no where. I wasn’t expecting it cause everything was going well. I mean except in something very intimate but he needed help and I wanted to show him respect and support. He didn’t appreciate that and decided to end the relationship. For my surprise 5 days after the breakup he was so ready to meet other people. I was like maybe the his reasons were excuses. I’ve been into no contact for 2 months. Went back to the gym, started salsa clases, join different groups in my community. I feel much better but I’m confused with his reaction. He looks like he doesn’t care if contact him or not.I don’t know if I want him back. But still miss him a lot. We spent great time together. He had all the qualities I was looking for.
Hi Rory, thank you for your videos. They are amazing and very helpful to understand the ex. Only how do I do no contact if we have a dog together. Need to explain this... On Monday evening she is picking the dog up and on Tuesday evening she brings him back. This is also on Friday evening and then Sunday evening she brings him back again... We life separate now. She got her own place now. Please if possible help me... Very much appreciated from a follower from the Netherlands. 😉
Hii im in long distance brkup....of being in a relation of 10 yers......im in no contact of day 21.......i realy love him.....i want him bck.....plz wat i do....plz repli
I've got a tough situation for no contact. My ex is literally my neighbor, across the street 3 houses down. She is originally from Virginia and has no friends here. She calls me every weekend since the breakup, but I feel like she's only calling because she's using me for something to do. The past 2 weeks, I didn't answer her call, but I text back hours later saying I was busy and had plans. She's already seeing another guy back out where she's from 4 hours away. I believe it started while we were still together. My question, should I just ignore her completely? Should I keep deflecting on the weekends?
I made a mistake contacting after i tried so hard 15 days of no contact. N text happy holidays after boxing day. No replied.. N texted everyday n text n said happy new year no reply.. Now i had it.. Going back day 2 of no contact screw him.. Tired of texting n no reply.. Was done since aug. N we chatted it for a while all sudden he stop replying cus he got pissed what i said.. Focusing on myself now..
After a 6y relationship and while watching this video I realized that I totally got over the idea of getting my ex back and this is a new beginning. BUT!! with that, I almost forgot that my ex has some of my stuff and I didn't even remember!!! LMAO It makes me laugh so bad xD what she has is a suitcase and warm clothing I gave to her for her abroad job and because she's still there (yeah, she broke up during long-distance) I just can't get that stuff back. isn't that weird? XD Let me read your comments!!
What I say, “I can’t be friends with you. I need to move on to find someone who wants to be with me. The reality is you don’t want me and it’s hurt me” I didn’t leave the door open for him though 🙁. Would be done back though?
Hi, It's been 5 months I have in no contact. But there is no communication from his end. Only in month of July he checked couple of times my what's up status, is it hopeless for me to wait for him?
Haha I have the most stubborn ex ever. I know everyone says it but my ex will definitely not reach out. I haven't heard for 2 months. She couldn't care less.
I guess it's just how the psychology works but, how can they honestly think you'd want to stay friends. I walked away from the situation, as soon as she told me, I didn't even drag it on , I just was respectful. Recently she has been stalking my social media alot. And a platform I don't even use, she popped up there now.
