“Familiarity doesn’t breed gratitude, just contempt” Give her space to miss you. If she never reaches back out she was never the one for you. Go where you’re celebrated not tolerated.
They ALWAYS reach back out. Whether they are using you, if they genuinely like you, if they just want as much attention as they can get it's 99% likely you will hear from her again when you stop contacting her imo
legit, ive seen that so, so many times. And at that point, my friendship with this person is over. Why should I stay friends with someone whos ready to discard me the moment he falls for some girl?
That's why you can't be friends with a simp. They'll trade you off for the girl they're obsessing over in a second if they think the girl will see them more favorably
Even if she wants his best interest, vanishing from your friends because you have a girlfriend is pretty simpy. You have to make time for you, your loved ones, your own development and your partner.
Dude my Boy dropped the squad for a girl who fucked another dude and had him pick her up from that guys house we dont think shes right for him but dude in love love .
Hit the nail right on the head Courtney. Guys gotta learn to stop putting women as the source of their happiness. Here's how I see it: find your own source of happiness in your life and live your life to the fullest. And a woman who sees you're doing exactly that and wants to join you in that life is the woman that is meant for you, period.
I agree that other individuals shouldn't be the source of one's happiness, and I don't make them the source of mine, but at the same time, it'd be nice to switch things up and not go to bed alone once in a while.
Well said. Need to step back. It's a difficult thing to do because I feel we get caught up in the moment and for myself I tend to want to rescue this person knowing she's not bringing anything to the table. I find myself thinking she's going to change but in actuality I'm the one who should revalue her. 🤔. Can't rescue every one 😔
@@M0101EP No!!!!!, we dont do that anymore. ..........friendship between women and men NEVER Exist you simp. Stop doing this. Your landing in the fucking friendzone Mate.
Yes I am 42 and I have to agree I slipped into simp land with my wife and I am regretting the shit out of it now!! It is a ruff turn around she absolutely hates working now and it’s arguing every other day😂 😂😂😂 but I am finally putting my foot down!!!
@@GoaWay4Sanity I don't know man, this does not seem like Chameleon behavior to me, I genuinely think that she is just straight giving advice to men to just not do the things she is talking about to not get taken advantage of. HOWEVER, I will say that we don't know how she carries herself in her personal life so I can't say 100% for sure she is not guilty of doing stuff that goes counter to what she is saying. Basically I say that in this situation taking the advice at face value is actually worthwhile because whether or not she actually believes what she says it is actually helpful advice.
In all honestly I believe everyone has been a Simp at one point in their lives, we've all been extremely attracted to someone to the point where we wanted to impress them, do anything to get them to notice you etc etc it's all a learning process as you age.
not necessarily a simp but a nice guy. Definitely ain't going back to that shit hahah. I love being around women and such. But they ain't above me or below me etc. Treat them equally.
This chick is a fraud. & she's not in any relationship, it's fake so she can do this job because no one would take her serious if she was single or a lesbian (getting major lezzy vibes from her). Seriously, no guy I know would go near this neurotic very judgmental succubus. Trust me, she'll put any guy in a funny farm. Only a beta simp would ever go near a girl like Courtney. She's not ugly or anything, she's just way too uptight & she looks like she'd also be a dead lay. Can you imagine her in bed the way she is? OMG, she'd be critiquing every move you make. Some dude did a real psychological number on her I bet.
If a woman is low value or toxic and doesn't appreciate you, walk away! being a simp is not good, you have to respect yourself, simple as that, thanks for this video Courtney
Never beg a woman to be with you. Never. If she wants to be with you she will. If not she won't. No amount of begging or acts of desperation will change her mind either way. Stay on your purpose and if she walks then she walks.
Both men and women must have the fortitude to say no. If you're not interested in dating them, don't be vague. Simply say you are not interested. And don't ghost either. Be straight forward and honest.
Bummer that is NOT in the female nature; unless they are from certain upbringing or regions, women most of the time will avoid conflict and directly stating: "I am not going to go out with you" it is out of the question, they will be vague, and undirect, it is what it is. Also men do not hate them due to this, they are just doing them, nothing to do only realise that this is their true nature and act accordingly. If you suspect that you are being led on then call out to them or cut the cord immediately. Preemptively walk away if you have to. So though since one has to develope a sort of sixth sense for this cr@p.
Well, to be fair, most women try to be nice about it. They will say things like: I don't want to date right now, I see you ad a friend, you are not my type, or a simple NO. Instead of saying what they really mean like: I am not sexually attracted to you and I am not going to sleep with you.... ever. So what do you rather have? Let someone of easy or be cruel? Don't make it more difficult then it is. If she is holding off or using excuses, she does not want you. Give up.
In my younger 20s, I fell really hard for one of my college best friends. At that point in my life, I never had a girlfriend...mainly because I just had no confidence. To make it known to a girl that I am sexually interested in her was beyond me at that point in time. I thought that I had to prove to the girl that I was somehow worthy of her attention and affection. Long story short... GIRLS DON'T RESPECT THAT. I wouldn't say this girl maliciously manipulated me but she definitely loved the attention I gave her and she was under no pressure to reciprocate. It really started killing me when she started telling me about other boys she thought was attractive, and I still didn't have it in me to tell her what was on my heart. It was only when she started dating her husband that I finally broke it off. Cause now I couldn't go back to being just friends. Whatever little confidence I had was completely shattered and it took me 5 years to get over her. Imagine that, I lost the prime of my 20s being sad over a girl who never liked me. Sad to the point where I couldn't reciprocate to girls who liked me. So I made mistakes 1, 2, 4, and 5. Had I made my stance clear from the start, that doesn't guarantee that she would've been my girl, but I'll be damned if she wouldn't have thought twice before passing me up. Ever since she's gotten married, she's tried to reach out to me to be friends because I do believe she genuinely missed the friendship we had. But now that I've realized these points since then, I have chosen to not remain friends with her. She will not get the attention from me like she used to. I have since been on many dates and I've had a girlfriend. I make sure that I don't fall too hard too quickly like I used to, and I make sure to see that she also puts effort in pursuing me too. To try to impress someone like a simp also means to be someone you're not, whereas now I can unapologetically be myself. If she likes me as I am, well and good. If not, onto the next girl. To pedestalize someone is just wrong and that is holding them up to a standard that they're not at. Women are not angels (men aren't either lol but this is a straight man's point of view here), they're flawed human beings like anyone else. If I consider her a prize, then I am also just as much a prize that she needs to put in the effort to win over too. Otherwise, THERE IS ALWAYS ANOTHER GOOD WOMAN OUT THERE. Brilliant video as always Courtney, you are the sister we all need.
Good on you! It took me a lot longer for me to get to where you are now. Sad to say, it took 10 years and 2 women I was emotionally invested in getting married to other guys to wake me up. When I reached my 30s, I approached women I was attracted to early on. If they reciprocated, great; if not, I was able to move at a minimum of emotional damage. Once I finally learned to stop simping, my life improved tenfold! The turning point came when I shot my shot with a co-worker who had been giving me some signs of interest. She said no at first. I was confused and disappointed, but I also took it as license to see other women, which I did. Six months later, I took another shot with her (we had developed a pretty good friendship by then) and again she said no. I was even less bothered by this rejection and decided to focus my attention elsewhere. Another six months later, she had taken another job, and I had moved from dating a few women to an exclusive relationship with the woman who is now my wife. The now-ex-coworker reached out to me saying she felt that our "relationship" was getting worse (to which my first thought was *"What* relationship?"). I said I didn't think it was getting worse, but things had changed because 1.) she had taken a job in another town and we had less contact as a result, and 2.) I now had a girlfriend, to whom I was naturally going to pay more attention. It was then that she revealed that she had "come around" and now wanted to give me a chance. I told her "Sorry," but that window had closed, and I never looked back. The woman for whom I turned the co-worker down became my wife, and we are celebrating our 18th anniversary next month.
That reminds me when i was at university i liked a collegue, but since i just went to university like 2 times a week i didnt had too much of familiarity with her, not to mention i was shy and i couldn't deliver any nice conversation due the lack of social skills. So i just followed her and her group of friends (which were my collegues too) but i noticed that i was a stranger there, everyone had high suspicions that i liked her so they never wanted to become too friendly with me bcz they already knew she didnt like me back. At one point i even gave her a birthday present at the end of the day when we were dropping school, i got a dry thank you she wasnt even that impressed. One day i told her my feelings while waiting for her at the school door, she listened, i told her that i wpuld understood not wanting anything with anyone right now (she did broke with her boyfriend some days before) and well, white knight shit...i didnt get any answer. She became even more distant from me and then one day i message her in the old MSN, about what would be her answer and she - now that was feeling "safe" by the virtual distance - said in a cold way that she didnt get why she would like me back if never made any sign of that and he weren' even close. This was painful but she was quite right about it, thinking about it rationally which made me from that moment realize that this shit dont work like this in a diplomatic way, you can't rationalize love bcz it's not a rational emotion. If you wamt to conquer a girl's heart you need to make her feel emotionally attached to you.
Thanks for your honesty bro. This has been me, more or less, up until the end of my toxic marriage where she left after cheating. Now in my mid-40s, with a bit of distance from that mess, I can see the whole picture as you can. I just wish I could have done it 15 years ago.
This seems to be a healthy response and not filled with general hatred for women like many of the comments are. I hope more learn through your tough experience and wish you well in the future! I think it will turn a whole lot better considering what you learned from this experience.
This was basically me 2 and a half years ago. It took until she mocked me about something very important to me to snap out and finally realise I need to respect myself. Literally hundreds of hours of self help books have got me past this stage in my life. I cringe thinking back on how I once was. Thank you for the video. I love your content.
Pain in the butt huh?? Self discovery and realisation that is! It is better to have nothing gained, self respect and self awareness is more important (INNER STRENGTH and TRUE GROWTH that is)
So what you saying? self respect is about not bending over backwards for somebody?ppl dnt even no the street terminology of simp nor even no how ppl flipped it worldly overtime from the past.
You bend over backwards for Courtney "SIMP for me" Ryan in every single comments section, by getting down on your knees to kiss her feet. Do you even realise how laughable and sad you sound?
@@Mogamishu oh no buddy… you’re the one who sounds laughable and sad for leaving hundreds of comments on my channel like this one 🥴 aren’t you tired of this by now? Hahaha
I simped hard for a girl for like 4 years. It started off as friends but then I realized that I was in too deep. I met her father, i took her out and I never missed birthdays. She on the other hand never even wished me a happy birthday and would leave me on read 7/10 times I tried to contact her. She’d say she wasn’t ready for a bf but then be chasing after other guys that didn’t like her and I’d still be there to take her out when every other option she was after didn’t. I finally told myself that I wasn’t going to contact her unless she contacted me and long story short, that was 2 years ago lol. Glad I finally got over her but it bums me out that I spent so much time when all the signs were there that I was simping
It's hard to realize your unhealthy behaviour when you've fallen for someone. Good for you for finally understanding you have to walk away from shit like that.
Hey man, a lot of us have been there. Whether we want to be honest and admit it or not. I simped after a girl that was much younger than me and I was way too generous, too often. It was hard to detect at first because she really put on a great act as if there was some interest from her. I eventually had to realize that she was mainly interested in my generosity and not me. Hard pill to swallow but one day, I just stopped contacting her and wasn't even interesting in waiting to see if she would contact me. I just blocked her number and have had no communication since (4+ years). She tried to contact me on another platform (E.g. social media). I just ignored it. When I'm done, I'm done. It just took me a minute to realize it.
Very glad that you finally walked away from her, it’s a learning experience you are not the only one, unfortunately we sometimes get blinded by beauty or our own insecurities and low self esteem make us behave like that
My boyfriend used to pedestalise me. For some women it's probably a nice experience, but for me it was pretty exhausting because I was trying to see him as an equal and want to be seen that way. And most of all, I don't wanna see the person I like/love put themselves down all the time. Luckily, we were able to talk about it and he realised it himself.
Simp became a buzzword for a whole generation of people, and it's thrown around so much it started to lose all meaning. It became synonymous with words it has nothing to do with. I hope this video hits the reset button for some people so the word can gain its meaning back. The same thing is happening to the word sigma.
This one girl I knew only used to only call me when she needed something, I sent her a text and asked "why is it that you only call me when you want something?" She never responded...Good Riddance
I genuinely don't get how someone can do that to another human being. Even if a woman were absolutely infatuated with me and I were not into her, I wouldn't take advantage of her. I really don't have high hopes for humanity.
One of the lessons I learned is sometimes woman just try to put you into that position, and you have to walk away. If you conform to that, then you are a simp. I dated a girl a couple times and actually thought we had a great time. I paid, but I am slightly older than her and make way more money and never think anything of that stuff. I asked her out, so no biggie (for me). (no gifts, just paid for some meals at some trendy places) But then she ghosted me after three (what I thought was) perfectly fun dates. That hurt, but I got over it. Then a few months later she texted me out of the blue asking me for advice (professionally) and I did not think anything of it so I gave it. She then said "we should go out again" and started sending flirty tests and stuff but then would never go out. Then a few months later did it again, same thing, wanted something, real flirty, then would not actually go out. Finally, she called me up a month or so after that needing money (she was stranded overseas..yes, I confirmed she was) and made a big production out if it saying "she had no one else" and everyone was broke..yada, yada, so I lent her a few hundred bucks because the situation sounded real bad and I still considered her a friend and that is who I am. But then literally a few weeks after that she started asking for more money, like drunk texts at 3 AM when I was asleep, and I kind of realized that over that year, she never actually liked me, and was actually just a guy with money to her and with knowledge she could use when she needed, and that was why she ghosted me. She considered her spotty attention (flirty texts, occasional sexy pic)"payment" for my helping her out (i.e. simping) and I kicked myself for falling into it. Sometimes, you do not even try to be a simp and a girl would put you into this box, if you want it or not.
I came to the realization that I was being a simp for this girl I liked since High School. It’s hard admitting that to myself and walking away, but that’s part of the healing process. Wishing all my brothers going through this the freedom to walk away
i used to not get the one about "nothing reciprocated" because i was stuck in that " women are prizes to be chased " mindset and that i "as a man" had to go above and beyond! thank god when i changed that mindset things changed! thank you to the courtney ryans of this world and the likes of you for helping men out honestly
There was a great line in “The Godfather “ that is good advice to live by. It was “He never asks for another favor of the first is refused, understand?” Take that attitude with women you’re dating.
I feel that these points also apply to non-romantic relationships too. I must admit, that I have put myself into that situation. In my situation it resulted from not having a proper social circle when I was growing up due to reasons which I won't go into. The main thing is to learn from mistakes: the "worse" the mistake, the "better" the lesson.
No wonder why your channel is getting bigger and bigger. Everything you bring here to us is based on your genuine opinion. It's easy to say when someone is being honest and it's quite clear on your videos. Congratulations 👏
Another sign of simping is when you constantly complimenting a RU-vid personality for no reason or protecting her from other men's disagreements with her.
When I was at college I had a good guy friend who I realized was always talking about one particular girl more than most guys even talk about their girlfriend. I can't remember the details now but I know he was going above and beyond and spending money on her etc. As his best female friend I was a bit concerned and suspicious. So I went along to some event with him where she was there. She was very confident and charismatic (as well as very attractive) and my friend seemed unaware that there were a bunch of other men present also fawning over her. My friend had NO romantic relationship with her at all and yet was starstruck. I can't remember what I suggested to him but I did tell him I was concerned he was being used and I think my suggestion was just to ask her for something pretty minor in reciprocation, that any friend would do for another. Well sure enough she went completely cold and got angry for him not staying in his simp role any longer. The scales fell from his eyes and he realized she actually didn't give a shit about him but just wanted him to pay to be part of her adoring fans. Although he was upset he was also relieved to realize the truth. I am happy to report he met a great girl the same year and they had a great relationship. Guys, if you are not sure if your behavior is healthy check with your best female friends who will steer you right.
Other signs of simping is never criticizing her or not letting other people to criticize her for whatever reason. Not calling her out on any bad behavior that she does. Letting her have a sense of entitlement, thinking that everybody literally owes her everything just because she exists.
Yes, plus everything you mentiomed is a sign she is a narcissistic type and someone you are better off avoiding anyway. She'll string you along and likely brag about it in the worst way, when you arent around
Great video and all your points were right on target. I was a simp in my marriage, and continued to be a simp for my ex even after divorce for 2 years. It was just in the last few months that I started to wake up to how I was allowing myself to be treated, and then I saw one of your videos on toxic women and my mind was blown. Officially a recovering simp now!!! And here's the kicker ... after I told my ex that I would no longer offer nor accept requests for help with her personal life her attitude changed in a snap. Now she is polite when we have to communicate regarding our daughter she is considerate of my time. She no longer asks for help and I no longer offer. We don't talk about our personal lives with each other and I feel like a ton of weight has been lifted from my shoulders. I wish her well, but I know I am finally happy.
Listen dude, just because you or other guys are simps does not make a woman a predator. That red pill, "manosphere" attitude is so annoying and tbh, its just horseshit. Most women are good women and have integrity and values, as are most guys. Probably what's going on is you're just jaded.
Women can be predators.....if she realizes a guy a simp and does not shut it down but allows the man to continue embarrassing himself then she lacks integrity
Ooh, some of high school, to some degree, for me. I’m so glad I stopped doing most of that. But sometimes that “niceness” comes in as a habit and those of us who tend to do stuff - we have to work to fight what we’re used to doing, without excusing it.
I found your channel via Teddy's. You make great content and it looks like you both influence each other in such a positive way. As a happily married man and father, I still learn from your content, thank you!
I had a "simp" episode recently. I had a woman I WAS interested in that I had communicated with online. Met her at public function and thought I made connection. Followed up on social media and heard nothing back for a time. Then sent an email to follow up and the assistant answers and says they will pass along the info. Anyway thanks to watching Courtney's videos and others I came to the realization there is no interest and I am moving on. If she does not make you a priority do not make her a priority.
When you go to the carnival or fair, the prizes don't knock over the bottles or shoot the fake ducks or pop the balloons. Remember fellas, YOU are the prize. You need to be won over also. What is she bringing?
I've had a lot of the texting friends stuff. They're never upset when you stop texting them, so you shouldn't be upset to stop. Also went on a few dates with a girl that told me and I quote "this guy I was having casual sex with would buy me everything I wanted" thinking this is going to get me to buy her stuff. Needless to say there wasn't any more dates after that
Great program. You said there are five traits that you mentioned in the thumbnail but you discussed six topics. The five topics of the thumbnail are 1: Peacocking (cockiness too) : Eagerness to Impress; 2) Selflessness: Continued Attention to the Person without Reciprocation; 3) Emotional and Financial Support of that Person; 4) Oneitus: Placing the Person on a pedestal; 5) On-Call Service: The person can contact you at any time for attention and resources. The sixth topic you discussed was the first item in the video and the most important: Self-Respect. Where a person has a lot of this trait (as well as purpose) the more the other five become irrelevant. I will go so far as to analogize that self-respect is like a bowling ball and it will knock the other five pins down. Also note that the self-respect is the trait that a person has and keeps while the other five are OFFERED or GIVEN to the other person in the hopes of return attention. This always fails. Emphasize 1: Self-respect (and purpose) and likely the other five fade away and you go from HAVING a "Desirable one" to BEING a "desirable One." Keep up the great work.
Alpha and Beta are observed personality archetypes. Simp is just an insult and misused about half the time anyway. My guess is that the word was derived from "Simpleton", not helping them, by calling them names. Point out that what they do is "Simping" Just as I'm sure you wouldn't call your child stupid, but what they may have done was stupid.
Wow you absolutely nailed it Courtney and I was nodding along saying Yes, Yes, Yes to every single point you made here. Literally just 2 days ago I experienced all of these with an OnlyFans girl who I really fancied and always wanted to go on a date with and who I did actually have a first date with. I posted a funny comment on one of her Instagram photos (of her at a sushi restaurant) and she immediately added me & slid into *my* DMs. Good so far, right? Well when we arranged a date, she messaged me 20 minutes before dinner saying "Oh my train got cancelled, I could get the next or you could get me an Uber?" - Alarm bells were immediately ringing but because I "pedestalised" her I sort of ignored it as I was so desperate just to have a date with her. Then : 1. She never gave me a single compliment the entire date (despite me 2. She never even offered to contribute to dinner (not that I would have ever let her pay - it was just the gesture that would have been appreciated) 3. She never reciprocated anything 4. She asked me to drive 65 miles to pick her up with her best friend and take them to the airport for them to go on a cosmetic surgery trip abroad 5. She was texting me every day but when I tried to arrange a second date she did *exactly* what you said - she kept avoiding the conversation and kept coming up with lame excuses. 6. The final straw was - she claimed she had "lost all the cash she withdrew from the ATM for her holiday" and asked me if I could GIVE her a "holiday allowance". I immediately blocked and deleted her from my phone and all social media. I now feel so much happier at having "walked away" from her.
I’ve been through this before fellas. I got this girl a job and everything and guess what she left me for some guy she just met there. It was so bad that I let her use my car and didn’t know she was using it to see another guy. Some girls are evil and I didn’t realize that. I’m happy it happened though cause I learned from it and am happy with someone now who actually reciprocates
I think it depends on when you were born and how your parents treated each other. To me, its ok to show chivalry, however, in todays social justice dating area, chivalry is dead, and women killed it.
@@marc416 yeah idk. I’m lucky both my parents are still together 35 years later but growing up I remember my dad always calling the shots and my mom always saying “ask your dad” when wanting permission for something. These days when I visit home it’s more of the opposite so I figure in old age/retirement things shift. Bottom line is my parents are still together and I don’t want to marry if I can’t have the same. If divorce is a high probability these days forget it because I only want to marry once.
@@charliedallachie3539 I have been married for 15 years and I have had a lot of ups and downs. Anyone that looks at marriage as a probability of divorce will end up in a divorce. For better and for worse. People just dont take their vows or marriage serious anymore. Its not the act of getting married itself, its the buffoons who do not take it serious causing the problem.
@@marc416 yea I more or less agree. The biggest issue I will have is trust. How do you know she won’t just up and leave you randomly etc? My last and only long term relationship…I discovered she was cheating and she uped and left despite living together, since I was her tenant (planning to marry) I had to move out but luckily no kids. Bullet dodged but I don’t want to go through that again via divorce.
This is probably a comment for the “friend zone” video, but I’m definitely guilty of #4 & #5, and since being a “SIMP” can land you in the “friend zone”; it probably qualifies. I did get something out of this relationship… just not what I ultimately wanted (us to officially be “together”). There was this woman that was PERFECT (to me)… beautiful, smart, funny, and a good person (I still say that despite what happened between us)… a little crazy, but we laughed about it (she was above an 8 and definitely riding the “hot/crazy line” on the matrix). I met her through a relative of mine that was moving to Greece (we both accompanied him to the airport). I managed to work it out that I would call her to let her know he arrived in Greece. I honestly only intended to call her with that information… but we wound up talking for two hours. We really connected… we started calling each other and talking all the time, and the conversations just got longer. It was interesting stimulating conversation (and I mean intellectually stimulating). I gave up sleep to talk to her… I went to work without having slept because we were up all night talking. In fact, we only got off the phone because I had to get ready for work (and, of course, I was late because of it). We started spending a lot of time together... she had a boyfriend, but they were “taking a break”. So I got all her time and attention, and she got mine… then, one day, it stopped. She was back with him, but she would “breadcrumb” me to keep me in her “orbit”. A pattern developed… whenever she felt neglected by him, activity with me would pick-up, and I was always right there… ready, waiting, and willing to fulfill that need for her. We had all the intimacy of a relationship, but she always just called me a friend, and when he would eventually start paying more attention to her, she always went back to him. I eventually had enough, and it of course ended badly. She eventually broke up with him and moved to California (L.A.). We made amends, but of course, it was never the same. We’re friends on Facebook now, and I’ll send her messages from time-to-time (mostly joke MEMEs, or funny videos), and we might see each other if/when she comes to town, but it’s extremely rare. She came to see me in the hospital (Feb of 2016)… and the last time I saw her, she was with her current boyfriend (I THINK current… that was 2019; I don’t know if she’s still with that guy). We all went to a comedy club together… along with another friend of mine, and her husband. She still maintains that she considers me a really good friend. To be clear, I’m not still “waiting” for her, it’s just she came to mind as I watched this video, and I figured I’d share my story.
It's comforting to know there are women that will warn men about the women that will take advantage of guys. Thank you Courtney not only are you smart but, you're beautiful as well. Keep doing what your doing😍💗
I have experienced that last one that she only wants to text and call but NEVER wants to meet. Long story short I liked this girl in my neighbour in my hometown and we have been texting for more than 2 years, I lost all hopes of relationship and my last wish was that I just meet her face to face so that I create a strong bond, memories, moments which I can cherish but she denies each and every time. First she said that we are in a village where even a little bit of doubt from any person will create a lot of problem for both of us and I absolutely agreed with her because I knew the reality but also I knew that the way she dissappeares when I try to go and talk to her is very disrespectful as she knows that I like her she does this internationally. She shifted to some other place for studies and I asked her thinking what excuse will she brings up now, she says our professors and seniors knows each other very well and again I asked her this time that let's meet somewhere else where both of us are knew to the people around us, again she says it's risky. It's feels I am begging her. So I have decided that I am not going to receive her calls,messages, never texting her back again.
Thank you for this video, I struggle with social cues. I am an introvert and shy in most social situations. I have never really had much in the way of friends. I don’t know how to distinguish between real and fake friendships and relationships. Hopefully I can change my mistakes that I have made for the better
I recently took a girl out for a day of fly fishing. The entire time we were on the stream, one of her "male friends" blew up her phone with texts making sure she was safe. He went so far as to text her warnings about rattlesnakes in the area, pollution levels in the water and warnings not to eat the fish due to possible contamination (we were practicing catch and release and not eating the fish). She raved about what a great friend he was, but he clearly had other ideas. I truly despise SIMPs...
I was a simp for almost a year back in 2015 to a pretty girl who worked as cabin crew for an airline. Friends and well wishers advised me to leave her but I can't believe I was so stupid and didnt listen. I still wish I had not wasted those months of my life. I live overseas and she in my home country and I spent a lot on calls, sending gifts to her and even met and took her shopping when she came to my city on layover a few times. Absolute waste. We first met at my cousin's wedding in January 2015 and in the beginning she herself showed interest but after little over a month she barely replied to my messages with few or one word replies. Her excuse was she was busy with flying. But she wasn't showing any effort or intent at all in the relationship. In between once I did stop contact for few days and she asked me why I did so and if I was not interested in her anymore! Towards the end of the year around October I stopped contact for good and very weirdly out of the blue in November she called, talked as if everything was normal and asked what was I doing for Christmas and if I would be visiting my home country where she also lived. I told her yes and I was going to spend time with family and friends (absolutely not her). We never spoke after that. A life lesson learned and I will never fall into that trap again. Good that this happened earlier and not later on in my life.
While I agree with all the points it seems like loneliness, lack of options and/or sexual desire overrides sensible thinking and leads to simp behavior.
I won’t go further than spending $3.50 on a coffee and a walk in the park in the evening. I’m not spending like $150 on dinner for 2 for no return on investment. If she actually likes you spending lots of money I’d not necessary.
You shouldn't spend money on a woman who's clearly not interested in you. But if spending $50 on a girl who doesn't end up sleeping with you is that distressing, your energy would probably be better spent working on getting your money right rather than making up rules that could make you look cheap and broke when you find someone who you actually do want to attract. Just my opinion, not an attack...
Thank you for this. I wish I had seen this a few years ago, because I've too many of these things over the past few years. Now I am aware and will be shifting my ways of being.
The second one is true. I told a girl happy birthday online and she never bothered to remember mines. It was never reciprocated But I did use it as a indicator. And chilled
So, yeah I watched through this a second time. One of the things for me is, is she willing to pay for the date, or buys me something, even if it's small gestures. ...also, not that paying is necessary, just is there reciprocity on her part. Money is a huge thing in relationships, its one of the big issues. ...(like religion, which is often a relationship killer for me) Overdoing things with gifts and money can send weird signals in general. Thanks again.
The basic reality is the vast majority of women find the vast majority of men unattractive. So the question becomes how much time, effort, and money do you want to spend trying to convince a woman to settle for you because the guy she really wants is never going to look at her as anything other than a quicky?
Glad you’re giving this advice.Guys gaslight women with the crazy word but women gaslight men when they deny the existence of the friend zone and claim being a simp is just being ‘nice’ to women.
Friendzone does not exist people treat you how you allow them to treat you. Nobody with self love gots into zones. Respect yourself and cut people out if they dont do this. Do not got a eunuch and her puppy
God hates simps, don't be one. All jokes aside, he really does. My number 1 example of a simp in the bible in Samson..He only had eyes for delilah, she rejected him until one day Samson's enemies convinced her to say yes so she could find out the secret to his strengths.
I absolutely agree. I was once a simp to end all simps. No pedestal was too high, no demand was too great. I got walked on and when the "relationship" ended, I would spend months - MONTHS - trying to understand out what I did wrong. Finally figured it all out, but thanks to Courtney guys don't have to waste so much time learning from stupid mistakes.
Guys its OVER ! No matter how much you have or how succesful or manly or gentlemen you are. I have seen ''creme de la creme'' level men failing on them. Leave them ALONE. They are not 0 milage anymore. So many men used and abused them FOR FREE and now you will have to pay ? What are you even paying for ? Other men got it for FREE ? Simple logic ! Spending time on gaming has more value than all this BS !
there's not one person on this earth that i can't live without, and i make that very clear early in a relationship. you have to be willing to walk away and not look back!
What is excellent about her work? Her ability to deceive an entire legion of her simp followers into believing the lie that if only they keep watching her content and following all the advice she gives, they will have lots of success in dating no matter how short, fat, ugly or hairy they are? Sad.
@@Mogamishu I understand that it’s difficult at times. Even for the nicest guys with everything to offer to win over the one you want. You may be just what she needs, but can’t see it now and or just not attracted to you! However I believe Courtney’s advice is to the point, realistic and up to date with todays young ladies. Well done to the mature sweet Courtney I say😊
Women can have a crush on a guy, but when a guy have a crush on girl he is putting on a pedestal, to me is not natural to repress those feelings but unfortunately is part of the game.
It’s shitty for BOTH genders dude, because either way you are exaggerating their positives and ignoring their negatives, and setting yourself up for a rude awakening. It’s fine to think someone is cute, but “falling” in love is a bad idea. Climb down slowly lol pace yourself
I had a best friend who I don’t talk to anymore who I am not afraid to admit I was a humongous simp for. The 1st 3 points I have never done, but the last 2 was something I definitely did. Guys, there’s nothing wrong with showing your feelings to someone. But once you see you’re getting nothing from giving, then it’s time to walk away
My philosophy as per Dr. Gregory House: "Sevens marry sevens, nines marry nines, fours marry fours. Maybe there’s some wiggle room if there’s enough money or if somebody got pregnant."
This is a good video as far as the outlining of what symptoms to watch for in oneself. But I will address the elephants in the room: 1. “Look at what’s in front of you instead of what you want it to be” Yes...but as we know, Women will often not put everything “in front of you” to let you really know where you stand. So, if you have too many questions you don’t have answers to about just where you stand in your relationship with this other person, this is probably not a relationship you should devote too much time/energy/Hope into. 2. You cannot convince people to like you or want to spend time with you. You cannot. You might think “well, there isn’t anybody who seems to like me or wants to spend time with me” Yep. It bees that way sometimes. Sorry. Just find something else to do.
I definitely have been a simp in the past and occasionally fall back into the mindset from time to time, but I know that it’s wrong. Really I only relate to the eagerness to impress and inability to give up on someone who doesn’t like me back. Yeah, I am kind of desperate just find someone to be with, but I won’t sell my soul to anyone and do anything for them. I have dignity. I only give if they’ve earned my love and respect and I get the same back
I will say this. It's one thing to "simp" over a girl that you're not in a relationship with and just want to get the attention of to try to ask out. If that's the case then simply grow a pair and move on. It is, however, a very different story when a guy is already in a relationship with a girl and is doing all of these things for her, with no effort on her part. The days of the guy paying for everything are gone, that's not how society works anymore so in my opinion, if you are in a relationship and you are the one who puts 100% of all the effort into the relationship, you should have a very hard look at yourself and your partner as to whether or not the relationship is right for you. Even if it doesn't happen very often, having a girlfriend who offers to take you out to lunch or buy you stuff every now and then is VERY appreciated.
Something like that happened to me a month ago. I didn't simp for my ex before we got together and I believe she really liked that so we started dating. As time passed I grew to like her a lot and started doing some of these things in the list though mildly. Then after a while she stared going cold and distanced. At least we broke up on good terms but it still feels awful after a month. I guess even when a lot of things are going alright acting like a simp overweights the good stuff and they still leave you. It was a good reality check for me so I won't be making the mistake again.
@@victorivanov4057 Sorry to hear that but glad it all worked out for you in the end. I know one thing that a lot of us guys need to think about is that whenever we're in a relationship with a girl, you can be the most sweet and generous gentleman ever but if you aren't making an effort to advance the relationship and keep it evolving, she will eventually lose interest. I'm not saying this was the case with you but it does happen and actually did occur with my ex.
*Married 3½ decades now. I AM A COMPLETE SIMP but it evolved over the years. I was once an old-fashioned Alpha (I hunted, deflecting many offers as I searched. I didn't open fire -kneel and offer a ring- until I found the best one. She still has me & I still have her. We're grandparents.) DON'T BE A SIMP NOW, LET IT HAPPEN WHEN YOU HAVE A FAMILY. Don't be a puck toy.* *_Be an Alpha_* *Λ*
I was indoctrinated into this as a youngster playing via the vidoe game Simp City trying to impress NPCs, watching any Hollywood romcom, tv show, or commercial for that matter. The simpyness is learned behavior modeled in our culture.
Unfortunately, many guys who do these things may end up denying them. Denial, as it turns out, is a common defense mechanism. People don't like to be called out for one thing or another, kind of like how these "simps" are being called out for doing this stuff, they can't help but do so. It's like telling a smoker to stop smoking or by snapping your fingers when it's not that simple. It's possible to stop, just not as simple as saying the word
Watched this video many months too late... You're a blessing to the modern romantic community, Courtney. Lesson learned, good to see this video is hindsight 20-20.
