A Quick Update (I'm Still Alive) 

Something I'd like you to realize: I don't just watch you for the Blender content you provide but for you too. Your reassuring tone, soothing voice, and confidence with your subject matter in turn gives me confidence as I struggle to learn Blender well enough to do the sorts of projects I want to do. If you are having a health problem that keeps you from providing as much content as you usually do, or even none at all, it doesn't put me off but instead makes me want to support you all the more. It can't be easy for you having a condition that affects your eyes, something you depend on heavily for what you do. All I can say is that I hope you get better soon and during your recovery get as much enjoyment as is possible from the animated movies you've taken an interest in. Animation has always been a great interest of mine and it is animation that has brought Blender to my attention.

You should send this video to the doctor who dismissed you

wish you a fast recovery

Curtis, your intellect, world views, ability to problem solve, as well as your CG skills are all a part of why I come to your channel. I greatly empathise with the need to advocate for oneself within the medical systems due to the challenges associated with some medical professional predetermining your needs based on their brief read of your charts before they meet you. I wish you success in being able to isolate and treat the underlying condition. We care!🎸♥

Kinda a deep dive for your blender audience but you should seriously tag this for other people to find. I had to deal with physicians dismissiveness/gaslighting in the past, it's maddening. Now I just go in expecting it to be a crap-shoot 🎰. Glad you figured out your medical mystery 🍻

I wish you recovery and lots of strength - the community is on your side! Feel hugged 🤗

🎷 thanks for the update. Wish you all the best

Very impressive how far you're taking your own research, good for you man to take hold of that uncertainty. And as someone who has dealt with depressive episodes, I totally recognize rewatching your favorite shows over and over.. I have the same with Seinfeld and Father Ted :) 🐱

wish you a fast recovery brother

Hey Curtis, Thank you for the update. I am really happy to see that you are not stopping in pursuit of what is going on with your health. You are a huge inspiration! Don't worry about all the plans you had for this year. There is still time, and this isn't a race. Who cares what the haters say!? You got this!

Ugh, I’m so sorry you had to deal with a doctor like that… but I’m glad you found someone who knows what they’re doing.

I suffered from chronic sinus infections and migraines for 16 years before finding a proper diagnosis and improving. Can relate to the frustration of not finding answers, hope you find your answers and solutions ASAP. Thanks for sharing

I have several loved ones and close friends with chronic conditions. All with varying degrees of medical advocacy on the part of their doctors. So my heart goes out to you man. I’ve seen people with similar experiences and it really is difficult to watch. But I hope you know that the teaching and resources you have created really do help a lot of people in this field, and we support you.

its really good to hear from you, I hope you are not taking too much stress even if the situation seems bad. I wish you a speedy recovery!

Sorry to hear that your going through these health issues. Praying that your health will improve!

Wow I'm pretty impressed at how you took control of the whole situation. I dont think many people would have. I always thought through my own experience that doctors are very often dismissive when it comes to unlikely pathology. Like if you have a condition that doesnt match your age, things like that. I feel for the people who are in these situations. I hope you get through this soon, dont hesitate to post more updates. GL

🐕thanks for the update thoroughly enjoyed it. fascinating to watch your persistence in problem solving on your own even when up against complex medical issues -- missed you in LA!

Stay strong brotha. Thank you for all the great tutorials a videos. Prayers and support is with you.

Best of luck to you and thanks for the update 🥳

Honestly Curtis, thank you for sharing such a candid update. I'm amazed at your perseverance and dedication to understand more about the condition, and wish you all the best on your recovery journey

'Really sorry that you're going through this...wishing you all the best with the recovery and that you get good treatment! I'm not sure if this'll help but, I'm going through a situation where I'm trying to get help with my health difficulties but the professionals are being dismissive about it and are not helping me. My situation is completely different to yours but, this lack of care from health professionals is something which definitely needs to be called out. Anyway, wishing you the best of luck with your recovery and treatment. Look after yourself! ❤

Thanks for sharing - this is the first video of yours that I've seen, so they must be reaching someone outside the usual group. Hope all works out well for you - keep at it, don't give up, and wish you well.

Outch I wish you a fast and efficient recovery thank you for everything you give to us best regards

Thank you for the update. Sorry to hear about the condition man, wish I hadn't missed the previous video, would have pitched in some money. I hope it gets better for you and that you get doctors who actually care. That professor was cringe. Take care!

Thanks for your update, wish you all the best man!

It's amazing what you are doing Curtis, wish u the best, and hope your research helps you and maybe others in the future. A big hug from Barcelona my friend! 🍫🍫🍫

Force to you Curtis, we are here with you 🦆✨

Hope you get better soon Curtis. I have been dealing with type 2 diabetes for 23 years so I know what a drag chronic disease is.

Thanks for the update and hoping for a fast recovery for you... 🎭🎮🎶

i wish you quick recovery

I hope for the best for you Curtis. Incredible experience you’ve described, dark but also inspirational that you managed to keep going and drive the medical establishment to a useful diagnosis.

🔬🧬🧠👀🖍️ Curtis, thank you genuinely for updating us about you. Your RU-vid channel itself is important indeed. You as a person are more important though. We come for the Blender content, but we stay for you as a person. If there’s anything I learned from going to my first Bcon last week, it’s that although what we do with Blender is highly valued, it actually comes second to the people and connections. That’s what’s special about the community. I wish I could have met you last week, but I already knew you wouldn’t be in there. And although I’m sad that you are going thru something right now, I’m glad that you were taking care of yourself as best you could, and I look forward to being able to shake your hand and maybe chat one of the next Bcons. Also, I do agree with a similar philosophy about not contaminating our activities with memories of our experiences. However, I add along with that the statement that your updates are not depressing to those who really care. And those are those who really matter. (Lastly it’s hard to find one emoji that sums up my interests lately, I’ve been studying how the human brain’s creates the experience of color lol)

😺Thanks Curtis for sharing your health journey with us, I find it very insightful. If sharing helps you and as you said can be of any help to someone else following you, so go for it! Best wishes for a very fast recovery ⭐

Hey Curtis, man I am so impressed with your tenacity and will power. The way you have researched your health issues and have taken the necessary steps to make your on solutions if necessary is inspiring to me. You are one smart dude! I’m sending you all the good energy I got my brotha, don’t lose hope we got you, we are here for you and if you ever make it to California I got a big ol hug for ya 😊

I always enjoy your content thanks for the update. Sending positive energy your way 🌼🌺🏵🐝🏵🌺🌻

I wished I could see you at BCON! It was a whirlwind of a couple days. But I'm more happy that you got your health figured out, at least going in the right direction. Some animated films on my top tier list (that aren't super obvious ones) 🎞🎨: Klaus, Robert Zemecki's A Christmas Carol, Brother Bear, Loving Vincent, The Lego Movie series, Spider-Verse series, any of the Miyazaki animated films really. While technically live action, 90% is CGI and it's a gorgeous movie, so I'll add Life of Pi to that list too.

Hopefully get on the road to recovery quickly.

Hello Chris! I sincerely wish you to get better! I can envy your perseverance) You are doing the right thing by not paying attention to negative comments. Good health to you!

Thank you so much for this video. I hope things keep improving! Congrats on taking initiative, too!! I've been going through a rough patch, too, and have been replaying RDR2 as comfort. So... 🤠🤠

Thanks for sharing. I admire your sheer power of will to have made your own progress and to have found that silver lining! Would love more updates on this journey, very interesting topic. Wish you all the best. My emoji 🌍

Good work getting somewhere! It's incredibly sapping to have chronic pain and it's good not to overextend yourself, I think navigating the world of medicine to get what you needed is already wearing as it is. Take care.

Glad you're doing better Curtis and best of luck moving forward.

Managing pain can be very challenging, it wears you down physically and emotionally. It affects your sleep, your mood, your relationships. You have many fans Curtis, thank you for providing all the wonderful content that has saved me so much time and helped me learn. We all share in the journey of life but hit the waves at different times, I hope for a very speedy recovery and even a cure. Your suffering is bringing attention to this and WILL help others affected. Is reaction to certain foods a possible contributor? Is stem cell therapy an option? Sorry if I missed you mentioning these. I'm always surprised to learn how diet can exacerbate certain dormant conditions. Hang in there!

Yes, self-diagnoses and treatments are sometimes necessary. My wife's research expertise saved me from surgery and injections. Wishing you every success as you navigate through this.

Good luck in healing. Its not easy ( I have it as well plus bonus) but it will be OK. Take your time as you can - rush is the biggest mistake. So dont push. All the best to you.!gab

Rare medical issues can be a huge burden to deal with. Best of luck dealing with it and coming up with a solution. Thankfully once this is all behind you and it will a source of inspiration for future artistic work. Your work on the brain scan was very inspiring, and I'm sure the looking into microscopic things will lead to beautiful works of art. I wish you all the best. 🎞

Wishing a speedy recovery

Sorry to hear, you’re valuable member of this community, wishing you good luck and hope you get the support you need ❤

I wouldn't say you contaminate the channel man! I really enjoy your approaches to kinda everything you share about and how you approached your condition kinda inspired me to look over mine as well, so many thanks and hope you find the balance and get well soon! 🐶⛵🎨

My young son routinely has issues with his eyes that have no apparent cause (the symptoms start in the morning as soon as he wakes up and for the duration of the day he is basically hyper-sensitive to any light at all and hides underneath blankets in a dark room). Your account at least gives us an avenue to look into if it continues. Thanks for that. I know how hard it is to get medical professionals to hear out a problem. I had severe viral meningitis last year that did a number on me and it wasn't until I was in the ER for the 5th time seizing uncrontrollably that they finally decided that it wasn't just a migraine and that I wasn't a junky looking to get pills. I hope you can find the care you need to get to feeling well.

You are absolutely amazing for exploring your medical illness and taking so much action in looking for a solution! This is very motivating and Im very proud of you!

Thanks for sharing your experiences and troubles. It's not contaminating the channel, imho. Get well soon!

Gotta love those prednisone eye drops and the lasting bitter taste in your throat. I had a wildly different eye-condition that lead to bilateral corneal-transplantation. A lot of pain, but in my case, just temporary, though I have lasting problems I have to address a decade later. Wishing you the best. There is constant new development in eye research. Keep up hope.

Sorry to hear what you went through and you did great research. I can't wait to see more videos that inspire me and many other people. Thank you for all you work and great videos! ^^)

Hope you get well soon!

Pray for your recovery 💚 buddy

Thank you for sharing your experience! I'm glad you were able to find someone who actually listened and is willing to help 🎤

Awesome to see all the tests you have done, hope you can get over this condition or at least find more people that can help and/or understand, but I think it would help to change the title of the video to something more medical so people can find it easier no? I hope it does help...the best vibes!

🎵 sounds like quite a tough struggle you are going through. I admire your willingness to push forward with solutions and progress, knowing the difficulty is so much greater with medical professional pushing back against you.

thanks for the update! We'll get there. Although it's of course incredibly annoying and debilitating for you to go through all this, the whole process is also kinda interesting to follow and I guess you're learning all kinds of things 😅😅Thanks for sharing Curtis

Hey man, hope you get well and do even better after you recover.. That's a fact🕊️🕊️👍

Hope you feel better. :( Sorry about the bad experience with the doctor. My recommendation for a fun animated film is Nimona. I _love_ the character animation.

I really hope this video blows up because a 3D Artist studying chronic pain in a self-made lab is very fascinating! I also am wishing you nothing but the best. I love your Blender content, and your motivation for creating artwork is truly inspiring!

I'm getting an organ taken out in a month, and it has taken over every waking second of my life. I'm scared, I'm alone, I don't have a support system, hell I'm not even in the country I'm from. I know its not the greatest thing to say, but being transparent with your struggles is comforting to me, and I'm sure we will march through this with our head held high. Best of luck and keep taking things in your own hands because no one else will. I really relate to your trauma, even though I don't know what it is, and I'm sure your conditions are a physical expression of that trauma. Best of luck my friend, you will get through this.

Well done mate. Everyone's road is different and constantly changing. It's good to hear from you and take your time. It will be interesting to see how the water levels out on this. Can't help but be excited for you and what this brings about. Don't forget to exercise, eat well and sleep well. 💪

Hope you get better soon. What you did publishing this video will help a lot of people with eye health problems. Everything you share with us goes beyond learning a digital tool. People who criticize you need to learn that you are not a machine. Thanks a lot for share with us your life too. You are a amazing artist and now I cant tell you are a marvelous person too becouse, anyone other than you could just think, I solved my problem, anyone who has something similar should turn around and find out for themselves just like I did. But you didn't do it, quite the opposite, you are sharing with the us what you discovered.

Love you Curtis- wish you a speedy recovery. Let's meet again at the next conference! 🍀☀

Very glad to hear from you again Curtis. I hope they credit you for the discoveries I have no doubt you'll make. ☕🌶💻🚙 and Curtis. Why do all the awesome things start with C? 🤔

I could watch lots of professional videos online (and I watch my share just for the content,) but I curate my selection by who are interesting persons who share who they are as well as what they know. I appreciate all you share because you are truly honestly yourself in your presentation of whatever topic is important to you. Stay you. I'll keep watching. 🌞

It's a relief that you found someone who has knowledge of your problem. I wish you a speedy recovery.

Using the microscope to make digital artwork is a really interesting tool and concept direction to explore. Hope to see some creations and processes of that nature someday. Get better soon.

You're a source of inspiration, hope you get better soon 🙌🍄✨

🎮Just yesterday I was recommended the video “MD (Most Dangerous) Narcissists of All: Medical Doctors, Physicians” (Prof. Sam Vaknin) and as overly dramatic it can get at times, this surely rang a loud and clear bell for me and provided a welcome and long-missed reassurance. I experienced my fair share of gaslighting and downplaying and/or outright deyning of my symptoms at several doctor’s offices over the years. Worst of all, more than once these experiences would cost a lot of memomentum and instead of looking for another doctor I could end up very discouraged and inactive for crucial periods of time. I’m super impressed by your proactive approach & wish you the very best in getting this mess tackled and under control. Thanks a lot for sharing your story!

A very good watch my Dude! my wife is a nurse (if its not hanging off by a strip of flesh don't bother me) grab a pain table! unfortunately like all industries, Heath sufferers from the same issues - Brain dead managers in charge of a mixed bunch, some good some bad - a lot of that's someone else job I finish in 10minutes. I'm personally terrified of ending up in hospital!!!! Here's to good health and new adventures 🍎

That sucks you are going through all that, but I'm happy to hear that there is finally some progress. I 100% agree with you about doctors. I have had almost zero luck with doctors over the years, for many issues. The bravado/ego and nasty attitudes of many doctors really adds to the crap factor of the experience.

Keep moving forward knowing we are all there with you on your journey. 🌍

Hope you get better soon! ⬜🖌🎨

Good luck Curtis. I know how depressing and frustrating fighting with the health system can be, although what I've been trough was nowhere near as painful as I imagine your condition must be. Get this past you, you'll create an awful lot of content later. We'll be here. 🤗

Check out studies on Lionsmane and nerve damage..also Thistle extract is being worked on. Both and other mushrooms offer real help when it comes to nerve damage. Hope you get better. Also: Might seem unimportant, but I suffered from severe dry eyes with recurrent corneal erosion. I was very close to do a PTK operation. Instead I went to thailand with its humid weather and after 2 days my eyes were fine. I got back to germany after 2 month and my eyes got dry again after a week. Then I realized what I did different in asia... I drank way more water! So I ditched all coffee and tea and I´m drinking at least 2L of water and e voila.. my eyes got better. So what I´m saying is.. sometimes it´s the simple things that cause all the trouble.

Man I have my fair share of medical issues and know the feeling of dealing with dismissive doctors and specialists all too well. I think the fact that you are studying yourself in order to fix yourself makes you endearing and I'm sure many viewers, including myself really enjoy the technical and medical side of your findings (especially the brain scan stuff you did). I wish you didn't have to go through the pain and suffering in the first place, but please don't feel guilty talking about your condition and struggles.

Sorry to hear that happened to you, I'm glad you were able to get the diagnosis you needed. Wish you the best 🙏🏽

Wonderful news to see the situation improving🦀

🦄🌌🌌 Honestly, I'm happy to hear from you again. The world hasn't been great, so I'm not surprised that bad things are happening all over. I am happy to hear you've found a doctor who isn't overly dismissive, actually aware of your issues, and trying to help you. There's nothing worse for someone, even an actual hypochondriac, than to be just shuffled off without more than, "I don't believe you,". Everyone needs help at some level, and I totally get not wanting to ask for help. Another thing I'm pretty happy to hear, is how your artistic side is seeing use in some of the gear you're getting to help with this eye nerve issue. (I won't pretend to know anything about it. I know nerve pain at a surface level from some past co-workers, but I myself have not had it.) And I hope that view into the micro world will give you some inspiration for new pieces or even reflection on older work of your own or others. ^^ I'm not sure what access you've got where you are Holt, but a few animated shows/movies that I've seen that you might either like or at least see some of the technical side of, is as follows: Wish Dragon (While not overly promoted as such, Jackie Chan produced this one), Sea Beast, and Blue Eye Samurai (BIG warning for this one. It is not a kid's show and does have blood and nudity). I'd offer more but I worry about offering up things you already fully know about, or have seen. ^^ I hope you can get this thing at least in a realm of control that you are comfortable with. I realize this might be one of those things you can never truly get rid of, but living with things is what I'm hoping for on your behalf. I may not have funds to give, but I at least have words that are from my heart to offer. I hope that's enough. ^^

some recent animation recommends: mitchells vs the machines, nimona, arcane. also you probably have already seen it, but wreck it ralph is one of those serotonin rewatches for me :) wishing you well!

Aloha Curtis, don't give a damn about the others, this is something that took me almost 40 years to get to. For animation, I suggest the stop motion "The Sandman", 1991, from E.T.A. Hoffmann and Paul Berry. As someone dealing with bullshit medical unknowns, I appreciate your candour. Strength to you, sir. I wish you the best in your journey. Mahalo, my friend. edit: I should clarify, "bullshit medical unknowns" as in, it is bull shit is either of us (and countless others) have to deal with this kind of thing, not that the condition is bullshit.

Get well soon, God bless you.

Take care Curtis! 🐸One movie recommendation you'll want to keep an eye out for is the blu-ray release of Godzilla Minus One (2023). I don't know the exact release date for it yet, it's coming out in Japan next week, but for the rest of the world I have no idea - however, I heard it supposedly has the best VFX out of all movies that came out last year, so I'm really looking forward to see it as I totally missed when it hit the cinemas in my country. 🦕

🎶 Wish you a fast recovery and all the best. Good thing you found an helpful doctor.

Hi Curtis, I am happy for you to have found at least one medical person who is willing to help and listen. All my good thoughts to you. You are so blessed with a smart brain 🥳 Hope you'll discover new healing ways and treatment that works! I myself am trying to figure out what is wrong with me. Pain issues and tiredness and other issues. But blood tests and doctors can' t find anything. It's "just" psychologically they say. Nonetheless I won't give up. To distract myself I have blender and all kinds of creative outlets such as painting and woodworking. And thanks to you some nice tools in blender :D. Other than that I have found K-Drama. I do recomment! All of them have a recurring theme, a formula. For me it's like a healing and calming rain for hours on end. Again, good luck to you! 🍀🎐

First thing that came to mind when you said it effected one side of the face, I thought of pillows. Not sure if you have cleaned, changed out your pillows and cases during all of this. Hope you get well dude!

Thanks for the update, keep us posted 📽🎸😸It's your channel, you can post whatever you like, I am sure the real followers are those who are here because you are you - not just for your content! Wish all the best Curtis!

Thank you for sharing your story Curtis 🍜

Welcome back ❤❤❤

As someone who has been dealing with chronic health conditions and dismissive health professionals for years I wish you all the best. I know how awful it can be. I've also had a lot more success with self treatment. But where that fails I've had the most success with seeing younger doctors and specialists where I can. In my experience they tend to be far less dismissive and much more collaborative. I don't know if that's a uniquely Australian phenomenon, but from what I understand the British and Australian systems are fairly similar on a lot of fronts.

Stay strong, Curtis. Best wishes.

🥋Thanks for sharing. I understand the explanations and the symptoms. I worked in biomedical engineering. I am sorry to see that modern medicine forgets patients who do not fit into common illnesses. Your efforts to diagnose your problem are exemplary. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I think this kind of exchange is part of the richness of your channel.

There's a good chance that what is happening to you could be because of a sedentary lifestyle. I'm not sure what's the english medical naming of 'sedentary lifestyle', but you should try to do so;e research on the topic, because it can be a major factor in many health issues that appears mid life, many of them being really bad. Sadly, as much as we can love the world of CG, we can't spend our life sitting in front of a computer. It will cause so many issue to our metabolism and overall imune system. It might not be what you want, but take a year living mostly outdoors, doing outdoors activities, and I'm pretty sure your body will be able to counter and heal this condition by itself.

Hope you find the help you need! 🚗

🐶my gf is one of the most perceptive dog trainers in the world. She has been recognized by international communities (so it’s not just me). I’m here to tell you, ego is one of the worst cancers any profession can suffer. I could see that being true in the medical field as well. Fear of being wrong will always stifle growth. Always. I’ve seen it in world class trainers. Even if that professor knows his shit that will cripple his practice at times. I’ve seen this demonstrated time and time again.

We missed you. Thanks for the update, and we'll see you when we see you too