Are you a 4w3 or 4w5? | Enneagram Type 4 WINGS Explained! 

When you said, “He is all roots,” that touched my soul. I can’t imagine a better compliment.

im glad you described the 4w5 as "protetcting their emotions (4) and proteting their inner ressources (5). :D im SOOO sick of the people who say the 4 is just withdrawing because she wants attention... thats completely wrong and every time i hear that i think... "yep. the people really dont understand us." xD thank you for feeling understood ♥

That 4 w 5 saying she thought she would have the apartment alone and singing from room to room looking through drawers absolutely made me laugh so loud with relatability.

I'm DEFINITELY a 4w3. However, when I feel overwhelmed, I go all the way to my wing 5 and become very withdraw, but I deal with my emotions better. It's like I have two completely different personalities inside of me. And I like it.

I’m a 4w5 and this was super accurate for me, especially walking around the house singing! I do that constantly!😂

I'm a 4w3 with a really strong wing. I used to mistake myself for a 4w5 because I'm highly intellectual in my interests and I'm super shy (it doesn't help 5w4 is one of the fake personas I put on in public because I want people to think I'm smart). Then I realized that I'm shy because I care a ton about what other people think, not because I'm trying to guard my inner resources. I want to be my true self so badly, but I care so much about image that I always have this fear that almost no one will actually like me for who I actually am...

My time has FINALLY come! Most of the time I'm a 4w3. I am huge on emotions and I care about what people think about me to some extent. Fun fact: I was diagnosed with autism so that part about going all in on an obsession really hits home! When I'm by myself, however, I feel a lot like a 4w5. I like being alone sometimes and I like to process my feelings and brainstorm creative projects.

I love the way you described 4w5s, it resonates perfectly with me. Isolating myself when I’m dealing with things is absolutely my go-to move. I think because us 4w5s are so self aware (to a fault probably), it’s so easy for us to be independent. But we admittedly take it too far sometimes. 😅

4w5, so so accurate. I have been told I am creative with my gift giving. I also don’t like labels. I really like your videos. I don’t really like to be “seen” but in a way I feel accepted and that feels comforting. So, thank you. :)

I immediately started laughing when the 4w5 came up. Because I knew I was home alone today, I started singing and dancing around our pets. I also sang to them. I don't do this in front of other people. Ever. I've also been very overwhelmed with my graduate thesis project to the point that as soon as people come home, I will self-isolate in my bedroom and work myself until burnout. I won't tell other people when something is bothering me, and I won't ask for help because I know I'm a lot to handle. And yes, I do need to protect my emotions and inner resources. I only have so much time and energy to dedicate to things. But when I do, I go all in. So I can't do everything, nor will I, unless I'm very passionate about it.

Now I'm even MORE confused- I literally relate to both of these equally 😭

My girlfriend is a 4w5 and I'm a 5w4 and I love them so much. I have never been happier. We love you fours!!

"When I like something, I go all in" - couldn't agree more! This applies to all fours, I believe, but 4w5s will do it in a more introverted way, only truly opening up with people closest to them.

I completely understand what people mean when they say that they feel called out be the enneagram now, because 4w3 is me to an ~eerie~ degree! This was super helpful!!

I prefer loose leaf tea. I didn’t realize other 4w5s like going room-to-room singing with no one in the house

Wow this is so true. Me being ENFP 4w5, I'm weirdly Extroverted and Introverted. My introversion shines more when I experience negative emotions, or problem or falling ill, I will detach myself from humanity, and dislike being approached(unless being asked to). And I have unrealistic fear and anxiety of doing anything in the presence of others. Fear of Self-image affected, be it positive image or negative😣

“What were you going to be doing alone here?” Me, out loud: “Singi-“ 4w5: “Sing some songs” I swear my eyebrows flew up when I heard that matching quote hahahah I’m an Enneagram 4 who’s wondered her wing for a while! Every time I quiz for it I get told they’re equal, and I feel I relate to both. I haven’t seen this full vid yet but I’m excited :))

I’m a type 4w3 and this is sooooo spot on!! There’s a lot of confusion in between but I believe in my potential!

I'm definitely 4w3 and have so much tea!!! Like at least 10 types in my kitchen! I also feel like 'I have a happy personality with a heavy soul' quote describes me perfectly! So accurate 🤣

Hahaha I felt called out when 4w5 talked about being alone singing songs, wandering from room to room, just looking at things. Spot on. Spot on.

I am definitely a 4w3. I feel like most 4 videos represent the 4w5 most of the time. It is validating to see the wing 3 here!

"if I like something, I go ALL in" ..... I swear my eyes just popped out. That's me.

I need to tap into my 3 wing more so I can DO THE THING! I'm a 4w5 at present but have definitely been a 4w3 at times in my life. I absolutely frigging love all your videos Abbey!! You're doing amazing and your following has grown so much. Keep going 👌🏼👏🏼💕 Ps. The clip with you wearing the white Cardigan - you looked gorgeous 😍

I resonate so much with the 4w5 (especially the dancing around the house with a bed sheet over me 😅). However, I also resonate with a type 9! I'm kinda confused lol

4/5 here…perfect!

Basically, a 4w5 brings, gives, and has fundamental information of a given aspect or circumstance if they have researched it and experimented on it fact by fact rather than what has been read or written and simply followed by many. It's like we can explain things in a very simple manmer that even babies can understand them. An ellaborate information expressed simply to be understood by many but most importantly, ourselves. I'm also an isfp and fact is calculated not simply by thought or idea but by the 5 senses itself.

I just learned that I am both a 4w5 and a 4w3. The tea thing made me laugh my ass off. I have a lot of boxes of tea- mostly related to stomach issues I've had since ending up with post-infectious stomach issues. I really relate to the 4w5 as I have a lot of the 4w3 stuff, but not all the energy of it. Thank you! This was a fun presentation that helped make things more clear.

This was a great video! It really helped me settle on my 4W3 typing. You could say you nailed the 4W3…to a tea? I normally test as a Type 2 but my wife made me realize I’m a Type 4. I know my 3 is strong (I’m very career driven) so I was also considering 3W4 but after watching your 3 wing video, it’s clear that the 4 is the primary. I never saw much of the 5 wing in me but the gift example resonates with me. Thanks!

If I like something I neither can't do it without obsession, but I need time to share this with others. Like usually weeks, but sometimes months or years as a 4w5.😂 I'm also really protective over my heart and mind... I'm trying to figure out how to share enough.

I know I'm a 4w5, but gosh darn it I feel called out on the tea part lol

I tear up every time I watch your videos on Type 4. I always feel so seen and understood. I'm a 4w3. My wife agrees and 4witha3wing got it right. Thank you Abbey.

The 4w3! Thank you! “Energetic. Creative. Driven.”

You nailed the Bohemian!!

According to what other people says about me I think I'm a 4w5, thanks for helping me to understand better

Laughing so hard at the tea selections. So me!! And I love that quote you shared. Must make into a sign!

Thanks for this video! I wasn't sure if I should laugh or cry when I totally saw myself in the 4w5. I had been wondering what my wing was. Great video 💗

Please please please talk about what it's like to have balanced wings. I'm an Enneagram type 4, and my wings are quite balanced. We are not discussed oftenly. And we should be.

I think I finally found my enneagram because of you! 4w3! And I also like collecting teas lmao 😂

0:37 I felt that. Ok I clicked on the video because I was hella confused between the wings but alone the talking voice of your 4w5 makes me blush cause that's me, I feel exposed

I am a 4 and I feel like I could be both 4w5 and 4w3. I tend to want to protect my emotions a lot and then I become isolated. I know that's not a good thing. Other times I will be a 3 and be a go getter with what I want. I get so confused about myself often!

Omg, 4w5 is so INFP hippie 😍

As a 4w5, hearing you singing Grace Kelly made my night!!!

Your 4w5 dancing and singing around is everything 😂❤

just wanting to be alone at home to wander through the house while singing... that description was so spot on that it is scary.

not even a minute in and my 4w5 self has already been called out

Thank you so much for this video! It really did help me narrow down my type (pretty sure I'm a 4w5 now). I've been feeling like a fish out of water on the enneagram subject as I've always been an MBTI girl. But thanks to your content I'm starting to get a grasp of it!🌻

you really helped me, I'm pretty sure I'm a 4w5!! the dancing around the house singing is sooo me lol. thanks for this amazing video, I loved it ❤️

Some of my best friends are 4s! Love them so much!

welp. definitely 4w5. thank you so much :D

Abbey is my current favorite actor ❤️

I’m pretty equal on my wings which makes me feel even more conflicted lol. I can be around ppl and explore creatively with them, I love entertaining and cooking for FRamily, but I also have my very reclusive side that needs time alone and to listen to my favorite music in the comforts of my home…alone. Lol

Super helpful! Definitely helped me clarify I'm a 4w3. Thank you!

Very helpful, love your content! 😅 also, your 4w5 slightly reminds me of Neil from the Young Ones??

I'm a 4w3 alright. Mood swings are a given.

Feel like I’m both of these. I’m a ambidextrous 4 I guess.

Im a 4w5 and I love this video!!

4w5 was pretty short. :( I wanted to know more about the one I identify with, from you.

Refreshing to see a take on the 4w3 that isn't "snobby art critic" & shows some of the cool bits too It must be, like, the Mortifying Ordeal Of Being Known on steroids Staying tunes for the last 3 wing vids ^-^

Oh gosh that singing and dancing with the shawl on and flower pressing is savage 🤣🤣

LOL!!!!!!!@"Look through drawers and things."

INTP 4w5 here. One of the rarest types.

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Well, I though I was balanced, but I definitely identify waaaaay more strongly with the 4w3 in this video.

4w3 in nutsell: I am here. Obey. 🙃🙂🙃🙂

I, uh... don't know. I'm feeling both of these so much! 😩😩

definitely feel 4w5

It's also so sweet how you appreciate your bf in here

Yes, I loved you flapping wings 🔥

Love this! :) Excellent job capturing the 4w3 vibe.

This was very enlightening. I don't know if I'm a 4w3 or a 7 (maybe 7w6), or anything else lol. But one day I'll figure it out! I did relate to the 4w3 description you made. I just can't get this enneagram thing down smh lol.

Apparently I'm a 4w5, although that fluctuates, but as someone who's new to the whole enneagram system, I would just say that I keep to myself with my hobbies/interests 'cause when I'm asked to explain why I'm interested in it, I get weird looks... A little less angsty drama queen, more "do I really wanna have this 45min. conversation to explain why I know so much about hurdy gurdies again?" Occasionally I do go into those topics, but if I'm feeling drained in the first place, I know from experience it's a little much.

omg, it's amazing how you manage to be so authentic and fun in your videos. I'm Brazilian and I'm not fluent in English.. I'm sorry if I'm not being clear.

I'm a 9w8 but for some reason I can also relate to 4w5 a lot.. interesting

For a while I thought I was a type 5w4, but I'm coming to realize as of late i'm probably a 4w5. But, I am an Intp in Myers-briggs so my confusion makes sense since I'm more analytical, uncomfortable-with-emotions, and philosophical than other 4s for this reason. I find it interesting to see how my 3 wing comes out in tandem with 5 wing. But, my 5 wing is more obvious and strong to the point that I can look entirely like a 5 in certain contexts. For example, as a writer, I come across more like a 5 in more technical, argumentative, intellectual, scientific, professional, theoretical, essay, and academic writing, while in my creative writing it's more obvious I'm a 4. This makes sense because the former is supposed to be detached, analytical, knowledge-based, effective, and objective while the latter is more subjective and imaginative. I geniunely enjoy both styles of writing, so the 4 and 5 wing in me are pretty even in this regard. I find that in my day-to-day life when I'm most authentic doing what I geniunely enjoy, my behavior is more 4 like. My favorite activities, traits, and daily qualities include: introspecting, aesthetic, beautiful, understanding my authentic self/finding out what I authentically love to do more than anything, creating art and writing, spending quality times with loved ones, deep conversations, learning new things, warmth, skepticism, sensitivity, self-awareness, philosophizing, attachment to loved ones, daydreams, emotional depth, delving into my psyche and relationships with others, compassion, analyzing information, volunteer work, listening to music, exercise, etc.. I also realize most of the negative traits im criticized for are type 4 problems : navel gazing, self-obsessed, dramatic, envy/comparison, self-conscious, overly emotional, soft, pretentious, etc.. I find that I'm a very ambitious and hardworking -- I love to work and achieve lofty goals -- creative person, but I often value my privacy and "hoarding" of resources and alone time at the expense of actualizing my greater ambitions; my 5 wing dominates my 4 wing in the way I sacrifice my ambitions for my thinking time. I'm often described as ambitious and hardworking by people who know me, and I would agree with them, but I'm also content with a simple and modest life in which I have plenty of time and space for learning, reflection, and creativity. I struggle with isolation, and often neglect my social life to pursue my private interests. I can also be detached and more disagreeable than I imagine a 4w3 would be. I'm not afraid to express my opinion on something even if it might hurt someone's feelings. I don't care as much if people like me, I just care about doing the right thing and speaking the truth. This probably makes me less popular than a 4w3, but I'm certainly a very courageous person and am willing to stand up for what I believe is true even if that leads to rejection. Still, at my core, I'm a very sensitive and open person. I respect people's emotional needs, and am willing to compromise to what people need and humble myself and apologize if I hurt their feelings. The type 5s I've met tend to be much less emotional than me and can more easily detach from other people. I don't think I've ever been the person to make an enemy out of someone first.

I had 22 points for 4 and 20 points for both 3 and 5 wings

40 seconds in and I already feel so called out 😆

4w3... aaaaaahhhh I spent the whole 4w3 section with my hand covering my face LOL called out again Abbey

As an INFP 4w3: 4w5 are so cute.

Thank you for sharing this! So sooo spot on for the 4w3. Definitely resonated with 4w3 then the 5

4w5 here ! I love your videos. So creative !

Well that makes a lotta sense as a 4w3

Huh, I never really realized this, but I guess to an extent I use both: - When I'm around total strangers or crowds of people, 4w3 is active. I wanna show off my stuff and show how great I am, but it's more to show people how great THEY can be. It's like "Look at all the stuff I've accomplished, and I know you can accomplish it too, because I believe in you!" - Meanwhile, if I'm with individuals or small groups of people I am super familiar with (friends, family, coworkers I've been with for a while), that's when 4w5 shines the most. I've been told I give great and thoughtful advice, even if I give off the vibe that I'm digging a bit too deep into the questions or discussions I'm having with people. Is this common for people? Like, do people use wings based on environmental factors or situations?

These role-played comparisons are so helpful!

I love your description of the 4w3! That is so me! I always say I have the soul of the 4 and the juice of the 3! 😜 But I’m also a hard 4w3 SX, so I crave the juice. 😆 Thanks, Abbey! ❤️

My box of various tea bags 😚☺️😊

I claim to be 51% 4w5 and 49% 4w3 but that can vary between weeks. I very much do both.

Feel like I’m naturally a 4w5, with very strong tendencies of 9w8 that describe me just as well. They just exemplify different key parts of myself (with some overlap of course). Any thoughts on identifying within the enneagram in this way?

4 W 5 Here ;) Spot on

4w3 here!

Thanks for the lovely video Abbey! Hello all fours!! 👋 It definitely gives me hope to hear a 4w5 has a loving and supportive partner because I often just feel .. unfit for human consumption? 😂 And yes, I do love when the roommates leave me alone in the apartment 🙈 I'd love to give everyone personalised gifts if I had the time/money to knit all my friends and family scarves, or make them scrunchies and aprons, that's often my first motivator when learning a new skill. The self-isolation thing is a bit of a problem tho ... Either way, ahh I love this editing!!!!!

So excited for type one! Great video by the way :)

I love your 4w5 dress!

4w5 is so true!

Thank you for these insightful and amazing videos! Is there one of you talking about relationships between 4 and 8 yet? If not, would that be something you would consider making? (: Thank you once again and please keep this amazing work going!

You're so funny Abbey xD

Thank you for all you do, Abbey!

i was kinda leaning towards 4w5 but i wasnt sure then 4w5 was like "i dont like labels" and i was like oh yeah. thats me.

wow 2:00 hit me hard

I’m a 4w5 and I feel like I am a lot like you described here but I feel like 4w5s (I guess depending on how strong your 5 wing is) can be very cynical (I know I am) as well. Anyway, I recently discovered that one of my children is a 4w3 and even though I kind of prefer my dominant wing, I am a bit jealous of 4w3s because they make stuff HAPPEN! My son is so creative and he can just have this off the wall thought and just do it and it turns into something beautiful, whereas I am also very creative but I often lack the motivation to create and when I do it’s usually for myself or only those closest to me. I thought for sure that my son was maybe a 3w4 but he definitely is a 4w3. It’s just so crazy to me how 2 people with the same core type can look so different depending on their wing and even the level of that wing that they are. I love it though because it’s what still makes every 4 unique!

okay, i know this is a very old video so you probably won’t see this. i feel like most content around 4s and especially 4w5s involves them being very introverted, which is absolutely not the case for me. i’m trying to get called out for my extroversion and understand what protecting my emotions and inner resources looks like.