I REALLY, REALLY, REALLY APPRECIATE...the fact that you pointed out that they are extremely NICE when they meet you. They do anything and everything for you in the nicest ways. People don't look out for the nice ones like they should. I was fooled by a real nice one.
The original meaning of "nice" was ignorant and uninformed. I find it difficult to hear the word and not remember the root of the word nice, even though it has evolved to have a much different meaning in modern society.
I agree - sadly we may be the type that sees the best, always & assumes the best as well. I have realised there IS evil, & it may lurk where U least expect it! Stay safe girls! XXX
Same girl,,I was just divorced and soo vulnerable when Mr. Wonderful arrived--this jermtook me around 3 years to really get over. His niceness was unreal and when he stonewalled me my self esteem took a nose dive. I've had to forgive myself for my stupidity which was hardest of all, so I love this channel.Makes me hopeful for my future because im stronger than I ever thought. I'm truly sorry this happened to you as well.Stay strong and remember people care ❤ best wishes.... Cate
Fitness Mom In hindsight I think there are signs even in the beginning, in spite of the “good guy” act. Sometimes there is evidence of abuse of others, history. Bad behavior, unreliable for instance but lots of apologies to confuse their victim.
How I wish I'd known someone like you 20 years ago. Would have saved me decades of horror. Not understanding what it is you're dealing with can kill you.
Exactly. I just wish they taught you about this in high school. Kids that age are starting to date and pair off. It would have saved me much grief and heartache if I had learned this at 16 in instead of decades later.
When you talk about Chris Watts rage at Bella, I feel it manifested because she very obviously preferred Shannan. He stated in one video that he took care to ‘bond’ with the second child Cece so that she preferred him to do some things rather than Shannan. The fact that the little girl was very anxious to see her mother, who she missed a great deal, and kept waking up to ask if Shannan was home would have irritated him greatly the night before her arrival home. In his interview with the police he describes the trips home from preschool with the little ones crying for Shannan and it suggests his pickups were perfunctory and not pleasurable. Perhaps he behaved slightly differently when Shannan wasn’t around and the mask could slip? More impatient, irritated? Little Bella provoked rage by inconveniently surviving his first attempt thus becoming a problem to be dealt with, among the other tasks to be accomplished with that morning with a tight deadline. The fact that she questioned him, then fought to survive would have fuelled that rage too. The pictures of his victims are macabre trophies imo. I’m betting there are no pictures of Cindy on his cell wall - he’s her creature in every way, and yet I feel that he has contempt for Mommy Dearest as well as dislike and unwilling attachment. Of all the victims, I pity little Bella the most. She was a gentle little soul and she underwent an unspeakable time of horror before passing.
As I was reading your comment, which I 100% agree with. I had the thought. The real winner here is Cindy. She got rid of SW and now CW will always be dependent on Cindy. She will always know right where he is.
The jealousy twds the mother, bc of the children's love for Shanann. Mother, is God to their children. Since Shanann, worked from home, they saw more of her, than they saw of their father. And he may have showed the true side of his face, moreso to the girls in the absence of the mother. Bella, was a very smart little girl, and let's not forget, Bella, was the one who awoke in the night & asked her father, what was wrong with mommy? I think he's just evil. I also think he got quite a thrill, out of killing all three, rather 4, of them. He's a monster, and so is his mother. Monsters raise monsters. I'm so sorry that Shanann, married him & made 2, almost 3 children by him. I hope he rots.
He actually asked what pictures of the kids they used at the memorial! I thought that weird trophy thing, granted I don't understand it. I thought it hilarious Bella wanted nothing to do with him. Kids read energy so much better than adults. I actually wonder if he was poisoning cece. It seemed like she was allergic to a lot and he used distancing language to say it was Shanann that showed him a picture. Not sure if it was another put down or because he was doing something to her. She also had breathing issues, something in her neck.... just like Shanann, who had that neck surgery. Chris always complained about how hyper and loud cece was... yet she was always with him. So I do wonder if he practiced choking her. I don't think it's over the line bc he admitted to trying to drug Shanann over and over to the point of even killing her. Though originally to cause a miscarriage, as if that's better. I don't know if I believe he was fine and just snapped theory. Every move was calculated down to knowing the girls weight/size in comparison to the oil tanks. Apparently he also had a photographic memory. So when I see him acting dumb (like always) I know he's hiding something. Like not knowing what a pregnancy test is bc he was cheating and trying to change the subject.
I absolutely love this channel! Such a thorough and educated response every time. Not to mention she is absolutely beautiful. Truly an amazing woman thank you Live Abuse Free!!!!
Very important, you mentioned that putting blame on women even as victims is rooted in societies. To talk about this subject publicly is courageous, so thank you for your professional but also sympathetic assessment and videos.
Yes. I notice this out in RL, and it is extremely common in you tube comments. It is seen in female-victim-blaming, as well as the casting about for mothers , wives, ex-girlfriends, sisters, grandmothers (Mrs Bates, anyone?) to blame for the actions of men. Watching what I did of the Heard/Depp trial (where it was extremely evident that Heard lied, made false claims, and that the jury chose correctly), it has been awful (not sure if this is the best word to use, and I hope I am not misunderstood by using it here) to see the amount of vitriol directed towards Heard. Yes, she is guilty, but the hatred, glee, derision is quite different (and more personal? extreme?) to that expressed towards men when they are shown to lie in court, or when men are shown to have abused women. There is also a degree of generalisation outwards towards women in general in many comments, ie..."see how these lying women lie"/"see how these feminists are" types of comments. I am not at all supporting Heard and did not wish to go so off topic, but I do think this hatred shown towards women in general is the same thing.
More people need to point out how women are portrayed in society and how sick and illogical this is. Thank for stating it so matter-of-factly. Well done! Love this channel!
dapsolita People don’t listen, regardless to women like her. But they’ll listen to some idiot like Plunder who talks like a 9th grader on Xanax. The only people who listened are the ones who commented sincerely.
The scariest thing about watching or listening to his interviews, including the last one, is that he just seemed completely unaffected by it. Right from the beginning, the co-workers didn't detect anything out of the ordinary with his behaviour, even though he had just snuffed out 4 lives within the previous 5 hours.
I totally agree. Photos of the lives he took will give him supply. He must smugly look at those photos every day and feel powerful. The photos should be taken away. He should not be allowed satisfaction on any level for his crimes.
Juanita Richards Wow… OK I am certainly not an expert in psychology or psychiatric studies… But you like the person up above need to start studying the discovery!!! First of all why don’t you educate yourself and look up the word serial. Christopher watts is a serial killer now?? I don’t know what discovery you are reading but to the best of my knowledge these were the first murders that he ever pled guilty to… By the way, they were very good reasons for him to plead guilty… However, no one‘s ever thought for a minute he was a serial killer!!! Never even occurred to any of you that he was protecting someone????? He was told if he did not plead guilty he would get the electric chair!!! It happens all the time!!! You don’t have to believe me if you don’t want to because quite frankly I really don’t care… My husband was in the DAs office for years… It is absolutely common that people will plead guilty to something that they truly are not guilty to in order to get a lighter sentence or to avoid the death penalty. In this case… In my opinion, he was avoiding the death penalty until he could prove that he wasn’t the killer. Well… The death penalty no longer exists in the state of Colorado. In my opinion… Because I am not at liberty to share anything with anyone of you who really don’t know anything about this case… But mark my words and remember my name… There WILL be a trial!! He never got one the first time… But in my opinion… I would bet my life on the fact that there will be an appeal and a trial coming up and you are all going to be so unbelievably shocked when you start hearing the facts of this case!!! Cut me up all you want I prefer you don’t say nasty things on the Internet because it’s not kind of no one is calling you names… I am giving you my theory… I have stated that it was in my opinion… Which I really have very good reasons for my opinions… And there you have it. See you all in court👍👍👍👍😳😘🧡😉
Juanita Richards You are one sick cookie… You kind of sound like a serial killer yourself. How else would you know how one of them could possibly think?????
I would love to know more about his mother. She’s showed zero emotion for her murdered grandchildren and even Shanann (I know she hated her but even so!)
I agree it was a rage, not a moment of passion thing, but a deep, seething, long simmering rage. I do agree too that he was fully in control, and finally made a decision to act on what he’d had in the back of his mind for quite some time.
it was a satanic ritual, chris watts parents are satanist, chris and nicole were possessed with evil spirits, this was all planned years ago, i know it sounds crazy, but it was spiritual warfare between good and evil, demons and angels are real, and satanism is more common than the general public knows, it is scary and horrifying
Yes - the doll under a sheet picture that he sent her (with false explanation that their daughter did that), then later telling his Dad that Shanaan had take that same pic as a precursor to his false first confession (that she killed the kids)… these are indications that he was thinking about it. Also, the shift in his demeanour to her in the days prior… so evil.
47powerflower I write it all the time to people who hate on Shanann and beat NK down too. Misogynistic pieces of shit. I write it all the time and guess what? No one ever has a rational response, EVER! This is why we need feminism more today than any other time in society. Men cheat, murder and rape about 100 times more than women do.
Yes, I noticed all the hate towards NK - very common even today and even by women(sometimes especially by women!).I can't believe the hipocrisy -ok it's not nice to hook up with another woman's husband, but it's HIS choice. Let's not forget that she was single and Watts was married, and not to even mention poor Shannan.The first time I heard of this case, she was portrayed as such a controlling b*$%# that I had to remind myself that her husband brutally murdered her after brutally cheating on her.And I consider myself a feminist! Patriarchy is still alive and kicking and brainwashing both sexes:-/
@Nyree Harris It's a very important aspect in all of these cases.I would've thought that in the 21st century most people have seen through the archetype of 'femme fatale', 'clingy girlfriend/wife' and 'poor seduced man'.I'm afraid humanity still has a long way to go in this matter:-/
The people who hate on Shanann are absolute pieces of shit. But most of the people that hate on NK do it for a very valid reason, and it certainly is not jealousy or taking the blame off of CW. NK is no Amber Frey. This woman targeted this family with a goal in mind. Her lies and lack of empathy for Shan and the kids was beyond appalling. That alone is the reason many can’t stand her, and I for one say she has earned every drop of hate she has generated. In addition, her guilt goes far beyond knowingly sleeping with a married man. Do your homework people. Anyone with 2 brain cells can see this. NK being partially responsible for this heinous crime in NO WAY minimizes CW’s guilt.
@@deanwinchester3356 Sympathy for NK? A home wrecker? Get out of town with that. It’s got nothing to do with misogyny and everything to do with her being a liar and very willing participant in duping Shannan and stealing her husband. No one hated Amber Fry.
WOW! The truth you discuss about him enjoying committing this crime is absolutely chilling. The manifestation of this enjoyment being sufficient enough for him to speak of Bella's horrified are-you-going-to-do-that-to-me question; his posting of the eerily covered doll; all of it. I love your insight, and I'm so glad to see you here again today. Thank you so very much!
The first time I heard about Bella asking her father if he was going to murder her like he did her sister...I wept bitterly. What a terrible thing. I had hoped maybe he just smothered them in their sleep - so that they never knew how much their father hated them. Now that I learn that he probably...enjoyed...that she suffered that way...it's almost too much to bear. I read to my kids, and one day they asked me if monsters like vampires and werewolves really existed. I explained to them that no, those monsters are all fake, but there ARE monsters just as evil as they in this world. "What are they?" They asked. "People." I said. "People who look just like you and me, but are very wicked inside. They will do every bad thing we've read about and more. Please do what mommy and daddy tell you, and don't wander off, and do not talk to strangers." Of course, in this case, the monster was their own father. There was no where to run. Nowhere to go. God rest their souls.
Be careful watching these videos. Especially, actual footage of these predators. You can be traumatized by them, we all can. These creeps love retelling their vile stories they get a lot of pleasure from it. I avoid listening to those interviews.
Candice Taylor. My ex-husband was as well. He still fooled the judge into getting custody of our three children and refuses to let me see them. Now he's moved them to the Philippines. I knew if I fought him that he would have me murdered. He made that very clear to me
What makes you think that this man “enjoyed” killing his family...if in fact HE really DID??? In the past 8 months, I feel very different about most things with this case. The more I know, the less I believe about the plea deals. They were accepted as truth although there were NO FACTS TO COLLABORATE WITH!! As a matter of fact, the “confessed killer” doesn’t seem to know how his family was really murdered. I’ll leave u with that thought. 🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔😐😐😐😐😐
Shiloh Golden HE killed them in cold blood ! People like you excuse him of this brutal fact ! HE is responsible for this demonic crime ! Stop spreading doubt and hold HIM responsible for HIS disgusting actions
Sasha 55 IF you can SHOW ME EVIDENCE that he truly killed them, I will believe you. But... aside from his forced bogus confessions... there is VIRTUALLY 0 EVIDENCE!!! 0 PER CENT!!! !!!!
So happy to see your beautiful face! 100% agree with your assessment of Kessinger. Thank you for addressing her. I am so frustrated with all the baseless and factless conspiracy theories involving her. It. Was. Watts. Just Watts.
You are a very high quality therapist and your lectures on youtube are very valuable. There are so many therapists especially for NPD who charge a lot for their articles and lectures and yet yours are free. What a legend you are to offer such help and blessing to people. God bless you. Keeping you in my prayers soul sister.
I think you’re spot on with the description of Nichol Kessinger. It’s unbelievable how many people think that she is involved with the actual murder.Thanks again for this well put together informative video😊
The mistress is a hard-faced, selfish tramp but I feel it's quite crazy that ppl assume she actually helped him with the murders. Why wd he reveal his true face 2 her as a killer... That's far 2 risky 4 him! Chris Watts lived a lie, he had that 'great guy' mask super glued & he faked that he was sweet, easy & laid-back 2 the mistress, exactly as he did 2 his wife at the time he 1st dated her. He was a fit, muscular guy, it was easy 4 him 2 kill a preggers lady & 2 kids, he did it by himself. This 'LAF' vid says it best - Chris Watts wd have blamed her 4 the murders if she were there, he'd luv 2 give her the blame - at the very least, share it! But he admitted that he did all 3 murders. That says it all - why wd he prctect her if she helped him, that is ridiculus he wd slag her 2 detectives!
@CRACKERJack Thesarcasticcat U seem 2 assume L.E. have yet 2 check her! Fact is, detectives already did - clearly they revealed zilch that suggests she directly helped Chris Watts with the murders. That's why she walks free! The case is fimished I wish ppl wud accept that, the killer is caged.
@CRACKERJack Thesarcasticcat I agree, detectives are ppl, they are fallible & they have made terrible mistakes with past murder cases. I feel they gave Chris Watts' hard-faced mistress a very easy ride, purely because she called them 1st & claimed she wished 2 help them. Bullshit! She deserved 2 be put thru a really tuff time but she pretty much led the detectives & dictated all the terms - it was a farce! Like the killer Chris Watts, she acted the victim 2 get sympathy. That said, I feel sure if she were directly implicated, they'd have arrested & charged her. They clearly checked her & came up with zilch - had she participated, evidece wd surely have surfaced. This crime type, ie family murder, is pretty much always a depraved act by 1 killer - the male hubby & father. I fail 2 see why he wd wish 2 get his mistress 2 help him kill them. I believe he was desperate 2 HIDE the crime frcm her, & play the 'great guy' he had always faked, because it impressed ppl & made them like him!
I’m so glad I found your channel. People like you, along with my team of doctors & psychologists lol, are really helping me understand myself. I am a “sociopath with narcissistic traits” I didn’t know what I was until I was 36 and my life was in a tailspin. We have no idea why we are the way we are. What caused it, what perpetuates it... Often, we don’t even realize what’s giving us joy and why that person’s so insulted/hurt by it. We do pick and choose who would benefit us most. Won’t know why until you see a therapist. It’s just wild. I’ll be in severe therapy for the rest of my life, I don’t want to hurt people. I have 2 kids. I’m their only parent. My kids are the only ones I can’t hurt ..but it’s not out of empathy, it’s more because they are MINE. They are a reflection of me and my care of them. They have it made in the shade..I’m protective of them. I am not a nice person and I am not a safe person. I’m mean, in control, and aggressive. I will never have the same level of care for anyone else, as I do my children. It’s so sad. I live a lonely life because I’m hyper aware of myself
As a rape survivor I appreciate everything about your videos. They truely are helping me to understand, why victim blaming is so toxic and why do we do that: our society is gaslighting us. I just wanna hug you and cry, you are amazing. You are like a big sister online. ♥️😭
Lesson to be learnt.......don't rush into a commitment, be careful and wise. This can come with maturity, unfortunately a narcissist conned me when I was 19yrs old, and 2 children later, aged 4 and 7 yrs, I escaped...thankfully. ♥️
Yeah, I wised up too now that I'm over 40 😒 and have had some experiences. I think young girls need to be warned specifically about this especially because romance stories are tellng them the opposite.....wasn't it romantic that Chris let Shannan lie in his lap....I would never have considered it a red flag until it was pointed out just now in the video.
@Femke Kuiling. I have noticed how many times the woman falls in love with the guy that kidnapped her, hurt her, even almost murdered her. But because he ‘cares’ or so he sáys, it’s suddenly romantic. It’s bizarre how common this is. I believe someone made a really good video about it a while ago.
Thank you! Especially for addressing how in our society women get 'demonized', for lack of a better term. An interesting example is when the show Breaking Bad was hugely popular people online completely bashed the character of Skyler, and praised the husband Walter (Heisenberg) like some kind of anti-hero. Even the show's creator, Vince Gilligan was baffled by that response!
Exactly! I was a latecomer to Breaking Bad and my heart went out to the character of Skylah. I was shocked at the backlash the character received when her husband was the one terrorising and manipulating her. She was the victim (for most of the series) and so many were on Walters side.....so mind boggling! My son initially had that view of Skylah- he introduced me to the series- then when I outlined my thoughts he saw it from a different perspective.
I don’t believe that NK is particularly a good person, but at the same time, none of us really know her, and we all make mistakes, I don’t believe that she knew that he would murder his family, and I don’t really believe that she got off on it either..
@@nachogirl35 a mistake is sleeping with a married man before finding out he is married. It’s no longer a mistake when you know he is married, pursue him, send him nudes, entice him with drugs, search in the internet for him and his wife a year before, tell him to pawn her ring etc, etc. That is no mistake! That is a woman who would stop at nothing to get what she wants with no regard to even his children. Whether she participated or not, without her this probably wouldn’t have happened
@@Make_Money_With_Kristen1 regardless of what she did or didn’t do, she did NOT murder anyone. I’m pretty sure she is not the first one to chase a married man, and I’m certain that she won’t be the last.
1)He thinks he is brilliant and everyone else is stupid. 2) he planned to tidy up the evidence in the house thst morning, he didnt expect anyone to be on the scene and looking for Shannan so quickly.
@@satsumamoon he would have got away with it but shannans pal nikki had his number,he wouldve gotten home n got rid off aall the evidence,but she got the police there b4 him,well done
Another great video! I so appreciate your analysis of CW because there's something about him that's so ordinary, which is really frightening. The more we can learn about him, the wiser and safer we all are.
Carol Wisner I think that’s why people wonder if NK helped or influenced it (for the record I do NOT think NK helped murder his family) because Chris seems rather normal when he talks. He doesn’t come across as weird looking in the eye or like some freak. He comes off shy, boring and nerdy.. and those qualities aren’t threatening. If he acted like some cocky dude who looked like he was part of the mob then I’d say “yeah okay, he’s whacko”. It’s scary how normal and kind people can secretly be killers. Scott Peterson IMO came off creepy, self absorbed, phony, with a high pitch annoying unattractive voice, and a story teller... it was OBVIOUS. That dude had the face of a douche I wanted to punch badly. I want to punch Chris too, but he just doesn’t come off the same way as Scott Peterson on a surfaced level. You really have to dig deeper in the case to see the similarities of their personalities. Also, Chris wanted to downsize his home, wanted less material belongings, wanted to work his little nascar dream job and stay in the working class life. Scott on the other hand wanted this big grand home, the big boss corporate money, people to think he was some big shot socialite and fancy. That was another difference between those two men.
Even in his latest interview he is still humiliating Shan'ann, referring to the smell in the back of the truck to that of a skunk, why use that pejorative word. I think he must have really hated her and yet she loved him so much, desperately trying to hand onto her marriage to him, it is heartbreaking to see her confusion in her final videos.
B Smith carry more load? Lol how? Banging someone else? Shannan was pulling her weight and his weight, was running her business AND his. Made him enough money that they were looking at a vehicle for him paid by the company all from posing in a picture and her doing the posting. She was also setting up another business in NC. She also had more money before his pathetic butt came along and is one of the many reasons he was intimidated and his mommy jealous of what she had accomplished so young. Seriously what world do you sick people live in that you can come here and bash a completely motivated and loving woman who’s only crime was loving a monster. Awful attitude.
kmn100 absolutely! To the rest of us non toxic people, it’s crystal clear who the problem was and it wasn’t an ambitious woman who had to take care of a man child. And it’s funny how they completely brush over the fact that NK was waaaay more controlling than Shannan and that he had a controlling mother. But yah, let’s blame the victim.🙄🤬
@@Bartwon Yes I saw in her videos gentle joking banter but nothing malicious quite the contrary. I also so the many loving things she said about him in her posts, it was obvious she loved him. Of course she based this love for him on the false '' NICE GUY'' routine he had perfected but she did not know that he was wearing a mask and was actually smiling through seething rage. As for the ''load'' he had to carry, these were his children. If you do not want the ''load'' do not have the children and certainly do not murder them and throw them in oil containers.
@@Bartwon Vile victim blamer! Utterly shameful! U seek 2 blame sadistic killer Chris Watts' faithful wife 4 the fact he brutally murdered & dumped her & their 2 kids, with premeditated pleasure... U are as crazy as he is! I guess his grubby extra-marital affair was her fault as well huh... WEIRD AF. This crime has revealed VERY dark & extreme female-hate lurks - Chris Watts used exactly that ugly psyche 2 fuel his murders. Maybe take quiet time 2 ask WHY U have such empathy 4 weak, wife & child murderer like Chris Watts & wish 2 blame his victims 4 HIS sadism. Sheesh!
You look beautiful in this video for starters. 💗 I think he is a sociopath too, and talks about his murdered family like he didn't play a direct hand in it and laughing about it. He is a creepy person.
You will be bragging about how great this person is to your friends and family because they seem so great...but they are planning and plotting against you. Using their niceness to trap you up in your emotions so they can abuse you later.
This is why this case has scared females like me... I was wary re males B4, my trust was always fragile - it is like glass after this crime! The victims trusted their killer & felt safe with him... that is very scary.
So true. That's part of the trap. They love bomb you. You brag to friends and family about your prince. Then feel ashamed and stupid when you realize it's a lie. All the while they are usually working behind your back to paint you as the villain when the shit hits the fan.
I used to blame Shanann 😔 for not seeing the red flags. I'm a woman and a survivor of narcissistic abuse. I used to sympathize with Chris... Now I just think the whole thing is just an absolute tragedy, and the result of adults not getting treatment/therapy. Your vast knowledge and lovely, compassionate way of speaking has really helped me develop a more realistic and mature world view. Thank you 🌷
How did you get to be so smart about human behaviour? You know these personalities inside and out. It’s impressive. I hang on to every word. Best channel of this nature.
Shannan and mother in law clashed from beginning. Shannan saw Chris's faults as the mothers fault and was outspoken about it - Chris had enough criticisim but couldnt express his feelings to S. He felt he had no other option but to get rid of her and reminders of her ie the children.
There is a lady in this comment section who seems to know Cindy Watts and she says that she didn't hate Shanann. She said that she had a very normal relationship with Shanann. I haven't seen enough evidence to say Cindy is a Narcissist.
Thank You so much for not only answering my question but so many very perceptive ones too. Your knowledge, understanding and ability to explain narcissism and it’s possible tragic outcomes using the Watts situation is so powerful. I just know your channel will save many from entering such a relationship by being able to identify the traits of a narcissist but also help those in the midst, and in probability trying to remove themselves from one. Thank You as always.
Watching you're videos has given me validation and confirmed that I was involved with a narc. I was always made to feel that i was crazy for my reactions to how i was being treated. I even wondered if it was me who was the narc but now I know it was him and that he thoroughly enjoyed seeing me suffer. He was very much like CW, having everyone believe he was perfect, his family enabling him. Thanks for your videos , they are really insightful ❤
I, too, was married to a man like this. In the 14 years we were together, only 3 people saw a glimpse of his rage, the rage I experienced behind closed doors almost every day. He was such a nice and jolly guy around everyone else which made me ask him once, "Why do you give the best of yourself to everyone except me?" He had no answer. He also needed to dress up like a woman in order to have sex. It was disgusting, he needed to be humiliated. I was coerced to do things I wasn't comfortable with because he refused to have sex my way. I liked passion and romance. When I mustered up the courage to tell him what I liked after our wedding, he said that that kind of sex was boring, that he'd _never_ have sex that way and called me "vanilla". I was crushed. I felt the only way he'd be with me intimately was if I went along with what he wanted. 😢 I had no self esteem. No self worth. And I was brought up to never say no to anyone, including my ex husband. The whole ordeal was hell on earth and I'm 5 years out and still struggling. This channel has helped so much, to understand what I was in. I have peace and happiness now, but I question it a lot. Is this real? Can I trust it? When will it be ripped away? 😢
My child's father sounds like this. He purposely tampered with the condom so I'd get pregnant. After a month. When I confronted him he uh "cried" and I left. He came over and tried to strangle me with an extension cord. He's in jail and has no rights to my lovely two year old son. I was lucky. Sadly so many aren't.
@@LiveAbuseFree Yeah I am very lucky. He...was a bad guy. I am really happy you pointed out to the warning sign if too much too early. He told me he loved me after like two weeks. Thank you.
Jay Mel , ia m happy you are here to tell us your story .
4 года назад
Is attempted strangulation by a partner, specifically during intercourse, a definite sign of narcissism or psychopathy? In any case, run as far away as you can, while being very careful about it. I cannot give more details. Thank you.
I like that you pointed out the misogyny of narcissistic people. In both sides of my family where there is strong narcissism, the women are extremely jealous of each other or the men mistreat and blame the females in their lives.
I hope you will let me know how you feel about this. It has been constantly mentioned, but not examined, that Chris Watts was extraordinarily quiet. I was raised by man who was very quiet and then I married the same kind of person. Twice. (Of course!) What I’ve learned is that people who are very quiet enjoy living in their own world. We all enjoy some time alone, but these people are extreme. I used to think, “Still waters run deep.” I was wrong. Many years of experience has taught me that they are quiet because they don’t want to confront ANYTHING outside of themselves. Extremely quiet people are cowards. They gave up on communication as a way to be in the world, and are afraid to say ANYTHING that blows their cover. A smile or shrug, or often nothing at all, is usually enough to get the other person to back off. The extraordinarily quiet people in my life were very difficult, but not violent sociopaths. They control everyone around them by shutting down and making it clear that they will not respond. Instead of forcing out difficult words, they freeze. At work they are well liked. Quiet, intelligent men move up in jobs. Chris Watts is like a child who is in trouble and cannot bring himself to say “I did it.” I’m not talking right now about the detectives. I’m talking about who he was until the killings. He was delighted to tell his parents he was leaving his pregnant wife and children. He knew that was what they wanted to hear, so it was easy to say that. Plus he got a lot of narcissistic supply from their approval. (A shocking thing to learn about parents, but that’s for another day.) But he knew he couldn’t bring himself to tell Shanann that he was in love with another woman; those were shameful words he literally couldn’t speak. Worse,she was being nice to him and trying to get back together. He couldn’t disappoint his parents -or Nicki. He HAD to keep his word to his parents so they would continue to approve of him. And he had Nicki, another strong person he’d made promises to. He promised her that she would be the only person in his life. His problem was looking at Shanann when she demanded an explanation, he still couldn’t answer! He had never yet made himself to do it. And If there’s one thing Chris HAS learned, a “good person” doesn’t admit shame. During the time he was living in his quiet world (Most, if not all of his life), he had never confronted anyone. He watched how others behaved. There was no way to manage the situation without speaking, and he had become such a practiced coward that he absolutely couldn’t be brave enough to tell his wife. So he devised a way to get rid of his family and blame Shanann. Shanann would disappear with his daughters, so Nicki would see that he could have a lot of “firsts” with her. He was terrified. He couldn’t be a man and force himself to say that he loved another woman. During the years of living in his own world, he had not confronted anyone. He managed his mother without confronting her, but now Shanann demanded an explanation. She wasn’t being mean, or he could lose his temper and stomp away. So he HAD to kill them. His cowardly and terrified mind decided killing her was easier than speaking. He held fast, stayed quiet, and killed his family. Much easier. It’s also the reason he pled guilty. Imagine the shame of admitting how bad he really was. Is he forgivable because he’s a coward? NO. We all had to grow up and force ourselves to say difficult things. Chris decided early-on to be a nice guy who almost never spoke, then do what he wanted to do anyway. He didn’t have to play by the world’s rules. He wasn’t part of that world anyway. That’s why being in jail is mostly all right for him. He doesn’t have to talk now and has no one to answer to. “Quiet” is the definition of his monstrosity.
Narsacisstic people get an absolute satisfaction of hurting you in every way. They can destroy a person or persons. . It's still over 2 years on is extremely sad and sickening.
Love your video, I found growing up that I didn’t understand very much, and I put it down to having a Covert Narcissistic Mother..They want to teach you their way, to be control, not having a voice and everything is about them...It’s funny that my mother hated her mother because she was narcissistic too"...But my mother did everything the same as her mother...Then of course I went on to marry a Sociapath...I ended up getting help, and support from groups and listening to videos like yours...Now I am single, with grown up children and loving life....Thank you for bringing these videos to us.....😘.
Your videos are very insightful, unbiased, and nonjudgemental. A great many people want to speculate that NK was involved because the world is still patriarchal and minimizes a man's fault by putting the blame on a woman. First, people rushed to blame Shanan for what happpened to her. Then it was Chris' mum for nurturing a narcissit. Lastly, speculation for NK's involvement. Always a woman's fault for a man's deeds.
@@LiveAbuseFree wow, thank you for the reply. You are educating so many about narcissism. I hope you won't stop and treat other cases too. I enjoy your videos so much.
I so appreciate your comment and all of what she has discussed in this video as it really put into words what I had been trying so hard to understand...that is why so many people are so adamant that NK was involved in the murders or that she knew that it was going to occur or knew that it did occur after the fact or that she was otherwise responsible somehow...such as she intentionally said or did things to pressure CW into killing his family when there is no evidence to suggest any of that is true. People that seem fairly intelligent otherwise come up with ridiculous ideas and theories to "back up" the claims of NK being involved. Thanks a bunch to you both!
@@PrimateProductions indeed. As LAF said in this video, people give women this power (in negative sense) to justify what men do. Im also thankful to have read your comment.
Your remark about Watts being possibly sadistic too hits the nail on its head. I never really thought of it that way, but the smirk that crossed his lips as he appeared on national TV while soliciting for them to come back (all while he is aware he killed them and hidden the bodies) was a giveaway of such callousness.
I wondered if Shannan lived on line to a degree to protect herself. It was all appearances but he was all about appearances too. He had to behave if there was a camera filming, for that duration anyway. And if she stopped posting it'd be noticed. If she sold him as a great husband he had to live up to that, or have strangers judging him. Did this protect her FOR A WHILE
you are the only channel with a normal, logical view of NK...seriously, i thought i was nuts for thinking he alone did this, because everyone believed otherwise ... I mean what are the chances that CW would meet a mastermind murderess masquerading as a environmental controller at Anadarko, and the FBI not charging her...that just never made a lot of sense to me that she was guilty
You weren't the only one!! I do agree however that I rarely came across anyone who did not accuse me of having a thing for NK or for actually being her whenever I expressed my opinion regarding this!! Good to see we aren't all alone!!😉
I think alot of you tubers profifing off this case wanted people to think shes guilty because that gives them something to talk about more profit for them to be able to make daily videos. There not stupid, they dont even believe their own bs
After hearing the Chris Watts interview where the detectives visit him in jail ad get the full story from him, I was mentally messed up from it. I couldnt stomach hearing anything else about the case and especially chris. Its taken me years to finally decide to see if someone could explain his behavior. Im glad i found your channel, your insight is very helpful and makes a lot of sense.
🇵🇷 What a breathe of fresh air you are. I've been trying to understand the mind of serial killers for years and finally I found you. I have listened to professionals explain like you do but always walk away feeling if I were a scholar in the same field as them I could follow along with their explanation but always walk away empty and confused. You on the other hand have a talent beyond your education in your field, You provide a "Press 1 for English" for me to walk away feeling so much more educated. Thank you for sharing this as it not only gives me joy in my field of hobby of serial killers but in my own depression and my narcissistic tendencies of myself learned from my narcissistic mother's behavior.
There is a lot of anti feminist views online at the moment. My mother was a narcissist misogynist, it has been a long journey, but I am happier than ever before. I want to understand, your videos so helpful
There are a few similar views expressed here as well - the female haters that emerge 2 attack a female murder victim are very disturbed. They reflect the same vile attitudes that fuelled Chris Watts' sadism. Very sad 2 hear that re yr Mum. Females that hate & disrespect females depress & disappimt me! I pray U escaped her & have healed, I realise the hurt is deep.
chokinonashes61 I am so impressed with your comment. I believe that you have come to a deep understanding, just based on the comment you made. Much Love 💕
I’m an anti feminist. Just tired in regards to talking about gender.
4 года назад
What do you call a woman who gets involved with a married man whose young wife is 15 months pregnant? I have no respect for a woman of that ilk. None whatsoever.
What a treat to find you posted a new video today!! I love that you always bring such profound grace, intelligence and unbiased insight to the table when discussing this very disturbing case. Thank you❣️
As a Survivor of a narcissistic Mother ,,, and only coming to the knowledge of narcissism ,,,triangulation,,, and gaslighting a few short years ago when I discovered this awesome Community on RU-vid of people healing and for lack of a better word “commiserating “ together ,,, it’s been very therapeutic for me to witness people unpacking and dissecting Cindy watts every word ,,, lack of emotions,,, jealousy and meanness towards her daughter-in-law ,,, it makes me so happy to know people are waking up and paying more attention to others around them ,,, and hopefully it will lead to lives being saved in the future,
I've watched a million videos about this case and yours really made me tie some loose ropes, and it was made so early in time... 4 years now... Nicely done.
Your description of a narcissist chosing a mate gives me chills. I have seen it in hind sight in my own relationships. CRAZINESS, I wasted so much time falling hook, line and sinker for it too. TY for doing these videos 😉🤗👍
Just get rid of him my love, these type of men just waste your time, my daughter has recently got out of a similar situation, she wasted 4 years on listening to his lies, he tried to isolate her from her friends and family. It's great to have her back.
So brilliant. Your comments on the brunt of blame women take in society, even when they are the murder victim, are so great and strong 🙏💗 You are a very strong force for women.
I don’t like NK but I do worry about her. If I was her I would be incredibly depressed and I don’t like the demonisation, she could end up killing herself. I don’t want any part in that.
Thanks for another informative video! I have often debated NK haters who seem determined to prove she was his accomplice. While I do think she’s a shady woman who obstructed justice, I cannot believe he would involve anyone else. These murders were all Watts. Planning and action. Edt: you’re so right about the order of the killings. Cece was wild and harder to handle. What a monster he is!
@Gloria Vargo oh no hon...I never claimed you or anyone to be a hater just because you felt she was involved!! As much as I might disagree with the opinion that she is involved unless people are just being ridiculous and very obviously biased then I don't think that about them..everyone is allowed to have an opinion.. I just don't like it when people try to shame me for my own differing opinion...so many say "oh you must *_be_* NK" or how I must "lust over her skanky ass" or how I must like to sleep with married men and think it's ok to do so and stuff like that..in every single instance that I have expressed my opinion that she was not involved in the murders or that I felt she was not aware..always, always there are people who say nasty things about me!! I truly believe everyone has a right to respectfully express their own opinion!!
I agree. My ex-husband not only had to appear perfect to the outside world but needed to fool himself as well. I think it would have been unbearable for CW when he caught glimpses of who he really was so it would have been completely out of the question to share that with NK as the person he was most wanting to impress. I think she felt guilty or awkward about wishing CW’s family were deceased and probably wondered whether her words had contributed. What I’d really like to know is, if the case were not solved and he got on with his perfect life with NK, how would he justify in his mind what he had done to his family, given that he was after all such a great guy. Based on his last interview, he might have forgiven himself and even felt sorry for himself that something took over and caused him to kill?
Gloria Vargo : I didn’t mean to imply that anyone who believes NK was an accomplice is a hater. Some point to things that they believe show she may have been. But, others just want her head based on dislike for her being a mistress.
Half Rutter Bella could see right through him. She knew what he was and was developing the fawn response to him and his hidden danger through her singing my daddy is a hero. She was desperate to placate and please him. She was the family scapegoat. She knew what he was capable of and she knew there was trouble but her baby young brain couldn’t process it into any kind of action and he knew she knew. I think he brutalized her far worse than the details he gave.
One thing that makes me chuckle is NK was afraid that she would be 2nd to the kids in Chris's life. She would be 2nd in his life to himself. He obviously put himself before ANYONE!
“Narcissists tend to hate women, whether they themselves are women or not”; “woman victim blaming is deeply entrenched in society” -- some key / interesting points
I've been a psychology addict for years. You are the best! You go so deep and aren't afraid to tell it like it is. Thanks for helping us understand the complex psychology behind this case; how does a seemingly sane, normal looking guy turn out to be a monster who could murder his pregnant wife and 2 innocent daughters.? It boggles the mind, pardon the pun. 👏
I think it's terrifying that you can be living with a narc for years and never find out they are not only narcs but also sociopaths till they try to murder you and by then it's too late. Wish there was a litmas test.
I've been MIA but appreciate this video and your wisdom, communication style and loveliness .You are one channel that can continue to discuss the CW case, even with no new development, and not seem like it's yesterday's papers. I agree about NK and think a lot of YT-ers could learn from you and wonder if they mind if I mention this channel in their comments! I love my mind being opened to new ways of looking at things---for instance, he wouldn't take off his mask. I never thought of him as a serial killer but sending the doll picture made him more creepy. A little trivia: Battery is a street in San Francisco CA and there is a thrash metal club there. Battery is said to be about that club, specifically the mosh pit, and "the family" ironically is about the solidarity of the metal bands and how they couldn't be brought down. Best... A bit of silliness: don't we all wish we had a Live Abuse Free meter before we get involved with someone?!
You make some good points in your videos. I think people rush into relationships theses days, it takes a while to get to know someone before you decide if you can live happily together in a relationship.
This the best channel on RU-vid. Your subs are rising every time I come. You are very well educated, can tell. Everything you say makes so much sense thanks for the videos.
In 2018: They had been behind on paying mortgage, had gone into his 401k, maxed out the credit cards, and when they got their hands on money (maybe a bonus of her, or his 401k) they allegedly paid the overdue mortgage, but still not the HOA fees, although those associations are known to sue over fees (and were about to do that by mid August - when he murdered his family. Instead the kids went into a 20,000 a year private upscale preschool, the best in town. It is possible that they could not quit once they had enrolled the kids or one kid, but how come they had enterd them in the first place. They had consolidated their finances by bankrupcy in 2015 (2 years after buying the home) Now that bankrupcy may have been caused by medical bills, it is in the year CC was born, and they missed out on any income Shan'ann would have had from a regular job (MLM came later). Bella was born Dec. 17, 2013 and Celeste on July 17, 2015. She got pregnant again (I guess also planned) when Bella was around 9 months old. Considering the strain lupus took on her the first time it would have been a good idea to wait. Even better to delay having kids for a year or two, savee up a nest egg, and then have the kids in quick succession so they siblings can grow up together and are close in age. Well, she likely planned both pregnancies, while knowing that lupus was tricky, and they had just bought the large 350k house 2 years before. (400,000 accoriding to a TV station. Not a bad investment per se a home like that in that area is estimated to sell for 600,000 in 2020 - so they could have sold the home and made a profit of it, enough to settle the loan and other debt). Shan'ann had a bankrupcy in her first marriage. They had one together in their marriage (in 2015) and only 2,5 years later they were again ! in financial trouble. If you are in danger of being foreclosed over missed HOA fees you are really in bad shape in the suburbs. So her getting pregnant and him not using a condom (there is a chance HE wanted a boy) was a BAD idea. And her health problems, like the 25,000 neck surgery (even though lupus was dormant in 2017 and 2018) and to a lesser degree the medical bills for the girls did not help either. I think he was on his way out of the marriage (8 years after they started dating), and was at the same time stuck in faking it. So his / her idea to fix the marriage (she may have sensed something was off, see the interest in legal advice about divorce in March / April 2018) was throwing the last fix at it (the third child, this time hopefully a boy to humor Chris. A child and potential financial drain they could not afford at all, never mind the instable marriage.). She may have sensed that he got restless or she had baby fever. So her idea - while she was busy making her MLM (hopefully soon) work for her and after the experiences of 2 preganancies and financial troubles - was to have another child. After she also had considered to consult a lawyer over a separation. There are claims she was in charge of finances, and he let her. Both were really bad at it, and also the decisions to become parents were not wise. The resentment of the constant financial problems may have built even more resentment. He was the reliable source of income, she was the one with the vibrant online presence who pulled off the act of being successful in business.
Wow. I had no idea they were under so much financial strain. She was so concerned about Public image as he was morphing into a buff monster who wanted the single life. Where did you get all of that info??
@@strauqq1 I had watched a lot of videos of Chris and Shanann Watts. I remember that Dr. Phil mentioned that they were about to be sued by the HOA (and he had gone into his 401 K another bad sign). The house was likely too expensive for them. They might have pulled it off, with being frugal, she having a beater car, and maybe a side job where she really made a little money. But that was not her thing. Her friend Nicole said to the police that the girls went to an expensive private school (not in a critical manner, she claarly liked her a lot, but even she remarked on how that was the most expensive school in town). And I saw texts of Shanann with her in group (female friends, and confidants often collegues and recruits of the MLM scheme). She realized in August (around 10 days before being killed) that he likely had a mistress, and he wanted a divorce (resp. he was not interested in upholding the marriage, and of course she thought that meant divorce. Her friends said: Don't be fooled, he does not admit it, but he has an affair, and tried to console her resp. giving her advice, also if they could try counseling, if she could forgive him a mistress. She said we can't afford counseling, and we will have to sell the house if we split up. We will sell it anyway and maybe get somehing with lower cost, even if we stay in the marriage. I think he had around 70,000 before taxes (with bonus), and a decent healthcare plan (oil industry) and the company truck for private use for little money. She on the other hand had the MLM scheme for approx. 2 years. They usually do not make money, it is a very small minority for whom it works. I think it was worse: she let herself be pushed into buying a lot of the stuff so she would meet sales quotas. Chris had to sign up for the car that was a "bonus" from the company. Not really: When they reached a certain goal with the team they got a monthly allowance for a car, but she could not sign the leasing contract (her former bankrupcy and maybe also other bad credit) so Chris had to sign. Typically those perks are conditional, if her (team) sales drop they typically lose the "free" car. Leasing is expensive and she was not free to get a more modest car.
Than you for mentioning the hate women get. It bothers me how so many people have focused on blaming every woman in Chris’s life, instead of focusing on the murderer himself. Enough already! Start holding men accountable for the horrible things they do.
I guess I should admit guilt. I wait and wait for a video from you, watch it about 5 or 6 times soaking it in. And then, can't think of anything witty to comment or ask about for days. I truly appreciate you sharing and letting me sit here like a sponge and just soak it all in. Wow.
I am in total agreement with you regarding Kessinger. I also believe his story of how he murdered the children. I can’t see him making up such a monstrous story if it weren’t true.
I am so glad to see there are others who feel as I did regarding the fact that NK was not involved and in believing that his story about how things happened was true!!😉
peters no one said that he was not capable of lying but you cannot be any more sure that he is lying than others can be that he is not...it is definitely a matter of opinion !!
gavin peters I believe he is lying about how he came to be straddling her. I think they were either having sex or about to and when he got on top of her, he strangled her. That’s why she was taken off guard. But it’s true, nobody but Chris knows what truly happened.
@@bonniemaecather I think that until the end of my days I will always wonder why it seemed that she did not fight back at all! Maybe that not the case at all and maybe things happening in just such a way that it only appeared that she did not struggle with him at all but to me, in every scenario that I personally can imagine, she would have struggled, fought back enough to leave some type of evidence of it!! If it were me and I happened to be asleep (as many people have speculated as a possibility) then as soon as soon as someone placed their hands (or whatever) around my neck and applied enough pressure to make breathing difficult or to cause pain I would have awakened and began to struggle. If he somehow caught me off guard, he still would not be able to hold down every single part of my body and I would begin to struggle! I just cannot imagine any scenario where one would be completely subdued outside of being extremely drugged, knocked unconscious, etc! Any thoughts anyone?
I cannot thank you enough for these videos. You are doing so much to spread awareness and educate people on how to recognize predatory behavior...I truly believe you could be saving lives. I can’t help but imagine how different my own life would be if RU-vid had been around 25 years ago and I had been fortunate enough to stumble upon your channel. Obviously I love your insight and am fascinated by the incredibly valid points you make here. Particularly, regarding NK. Thank you for sharing your knowledge with us! 💕
I love your insight and the way how you don’t sensationalise the topics, but rather let us understand the mind behind this individuals. You look beautiful by the way, gorgeous inside and out.
I’ve recommended your videos to my some of my girlfriends who have suffered abuse of all kinds! Thanks for sharing and caring! The world needs more strong smart caring women like you ❤️
I am sorry I haven't been in touch about the Freedom Programme, I have had a bump in the road although I am doing well. You explain narcissism so well, I am learning a lot so find myself nodding along, understanding the motivation. Thank you.
Thank you so much! I was so grateful for your first CW video because I was desperate to hear something that didn’t blame Shanann. We live in a world that looks out for men, takes care of them -and Shanann was being judged/not being mourned. Thank you for advocating kindness towards women. I’m not a fan of NK but I also feel badly for her and that she fell for his mask too. Have you watched True Crime Loser on this case? A lot of the comments on his videos commend your work. He is absolutely hilarious and smart. You both have helped me deal with this horror.
Good, I'm so glad that video helped. I did watch part of one of his videos the other day and will watch a whole one when I get a chance because I hear a lot of others saying the same as you.
I think a HUGE sign that Shanann (and the kids) were in danger was the contempt that the entire Watts family had for her...for NO reason. She was hated by Cindy, Ronnie and the Sister as soon as she started dating Chris. I believe they hated Shanann because in Cindy's mind, "Chris belonged to her." No woman could ever have him. Chris in his crazy/evil mind believed Shanann put a wedge between him and his family. So he killed that wedge. The kids are an extension of Shanann and that's why he killed them too. The Watts family is truly evil. I absolutely believe this is a HUGE example of the separation of the wheat and tares that is happening right now. The fallen walk among us.
You are a beautiful person inside and out, I am so thankful I found your RU-vid channel, your videos give me hope, and you remind me that good people do exist in this world ❤️
