Such a good take ! It’s so important to note that TikTok followers are worth a fraction of what a RU-vid audience is worth ! Taking your time and building trust with your RU-vid subs will pay off ! You’re doing amazing!
OMG, so shocked to see Lorry Hill here. I watched both her and Steph’s content religiously. Crazy to see two of my favourite worlds come together in these comments 👏
More background on fannita: her first brand trip was with tarte, a make up company who has faced criticism for years for only having like three brown shades of concealer and foundation. she didn’t take the spot of another black creator on the trip. The black creator that was originally supposed to go found out that she was getting less than the other white creators on that trip (she was the only black girl going) ,made a video about how disappointed she was and bowed out. last minute, tarte then called fajita and one other black creator to take her place. The story could’ve ended there, but if you seen the way fannita acts she started bragging about it being her first brand trip talking about how dumb the first girl was for not taking the deal, and the two girls that went on that trip were very condescending and disparaging towards the girl who bowed out. So there’s a big portion of why she’s getting backlash. She started talking about the pay disparities between black and white creators. Meanwhile, she launched the “influencer” part of her career by fucking over a black girl who was talking about the disparities between black and white creators. So it all kind of spiraled from there . She’s going through family issues, apparently she just had some surgery and she shouldn’t be out partying but she was. She’s always been a bit of a nasty piece of work personality wise, but a lot of people are sick of her and now. Her mean girl shtick was never gonna get her the “alix earle” money. to me it seems like an exercise and self-awareness. maybe instead of going under the knife. She should’ve been looking in a mirror, but here we are.
I hear you, however you can’t judge someone for their attitude then criticise what they do with their body in the same breath. Like what does partying after surgery have to do with the way she acted on the torte trip? The two don’t correlate…
@@oseremhen9075everything is connected. She clearly has a lot of leftover insecurities that money, clout and plastic surgery isn’t going to fix. This has contributed to her public meltdown and temper tantrums.
@@suoutubez19 I follow her on socials and ibr, how she’s been acting recently has been exaggerated online. Her behaviours not dramatically changed post-surgery. Infact, she’s been acting the same since before she had surgery so in my opinion the ‘problem’ isn’t any physical insecurities. I think a lot of people just don’t like her personality and that’s fair but you can’t condense your final judgement of her to be “she’s insecure so she’s acting like an arse”. She’s being herself on the internet and standing on what she believes to be true & isn’t this what black girls on socials have been fighting to do since the beginning of social media?
@@oseremhen9075well theyre related because of the way fannita talked about how she genuinely believed she would be able to get more opportunities once she got skinny. She said she didnt feel like she could say everything she wanted to say when she was fatter and now that shes slimmer, shes getting the same treatment. She has explicitly stated before this whole fiasco, while she was still losing weight, she was doing it to work towards being a bigger influencer. So if we compare how she was on the tarte trip pre surgery, to her now post surgery. Its disheartening it took a surgery for her to see she would get the same treatment regardless of her size.
Stephanie… as your long time subscriber and patron this is EXACTLY what I was hoping you’d see for years! Whenever you complained about the trolls, defended inconsistent posting or had strong feelings about not being an aspirational influencer, I wished so hard that you’d see the positives of being a content creator and the success you have achieved even though it didn’t measure up to the vision you had in your head or to the situation of other content creators/infliencers. I’m so glad you see it now and hope you continue sharing stories and deep topics ❤
Thanks! Tho it takes awhile to say goodbye to a dream. I’m able to have this perspective now bc I’ve created the appropriate amount of emotional distance between my reality and my ambition. I think it’s akin to someone who always wanted to play a professional sport and gets injured and realized they’ll only be able to coach. Coaching is wonderful and fulfilling but it wasn’t the original dream. For me,I had to realize that despite the extreme highs and possibilities available in this industry, there would be a limit for me. I had to learn not to take that too personally and most importantly bc there was a limit, take social media off the “throne” I had assigned it in my life. My goal now is to appreciate this space for what it can offer me but keep searching for something I can do with my life and my talents that will bring me the abundance I truly seek. And the trolls? That’s a whole different level of trauma lol. That will take years to fully process, bc it’s ongoing. But onward and upward!
I would consider you an influencer! I know the pretty privilege video is a somewhat sensitive topic for you BUT the amount of videos that were released soon after was a wave. I hope you understand this ❤
Just a recommendation that you, of course, don’t have to follow. I see a trend when you are discussing other creators, that you leave out a lot of context. I’m often confused and have to leave your video to find someone who shows videos, or better explains the story.
Hey Steph! I think I'll go back to watch the vid on dating apps; I've been staying away from that topic because my go of it was rough. But you have me cracking up on this video! Your remembrances of middle and high school are so similar to mine. People always ask me why I'm bringing up something that happened 15+ years ago: because they are core ✨ traumatic ✨ and now slightly comical memories 😂 I didn't realize Fanita was that girl who took that trip when the other black girl was passed over! The first time I heard her name was when she said "not everyone is beautiful" lol.
I used to be addicted to Jackie’s GRWM. We have the same under tones so I could purchased EVERYTHING she recommended. She totally upped my makeup game. Also, she and I are not the same skin color, but what she did was genius. She would always have her exact match and then go lighter and darker. You can drop me in a remote rain forest and I’ll be able to find my foundation and concealer match. I went to an African Sudanese influencer for eyebrows, a white influencer for natural lashes and I like only the expensive individual lashes. And a combination of 4 natural hair influencers for transitioning out of a relaxer without doing a big chop. Black American influencer was multi racial and our natural hair was not the same, so dumped her. But her transition tips really worked. Than a young Cameroon girlie to stop straightening my hair altogether (it’s been 5yrs). She introduced me to the big quarter size twists and no tight braids or cornrows. Our hair grew to armpit length together. And then a black American influencer growing my 4C hair down to my back. She helped me wash my hair without tangles, find my prefect moisturizer balance and to maintain my hair without it mating. This last fully black influencer is still going strong and her shampoos and conditioners are in Ulta.
@@hellostephco84 look how they hate on her for becoming wealthy on her own hard work. But she 100% should do a make up line. She gets the dark skin undertone issue. I would throw my money 💰 at her.
@@Morenita570ok and that was in the part of my video that I edited out! Are you spying on me?? lol. No I totally agree! I’m not a perfume girly so the fragrances are not my thing but the way I would ROCK some “Aina” foundation, concealer, skin tint, powder and whatever else???? I think she’d be real competition for Fenty. I would purchase for sure.
Yes so all you can do is be your version of the best…that’s valid all on its own! But if you compare your best to someone else’s…that’s how we get caught up.
OMG! YOUR BEAUTIFUL HAIR! ugh lol. I never comment on ones looks. Idk if it's the virgo in me. I just find it vain when i see people comment on someones looks( especially when the video isn't about that). I i just had to let you know. Your face seems to glow with your natural hair. I just want to hug it 🥴🥴🥴🤣🤣😹 umk I'm being weird lmao! Let me listen to the video now 😹🤙🏾🌻🌿🌬🧡🐞
When I say I CACKLED with you at the superman comment! 😅🤣😂 On a separate note: I've joined running groups, book groups and language schools (like, to learn another language) to meet new people and they have all worked! For me it was strictly for friendship though.
Girl! You have me looking at the meetup app in my location for running clubs, bc I love being outside walking/running, but I’m terrified of doing it solo. I don’t want to do it to meet someone, though. I have no interest in dating or doing ANYTHING romantic.
@@angieang26 Don’t threaten me. I just want to go outside and walk with my nose canceling headphones while in a big group in a big, public place. I just need motivation to be physically ACTIVE. That’s it.
@@rosedalinevaletine6931 I wasn't threatening you. I was just saying when a person isn't looking for love that's when love comes it wasn't a threat it's fact. I wasn't looking for love when I met my future husband in my college math tutoring lab. And we been married for 17 years now.
@@rosedalinevaletine6931 I wasn't threatening you love happens when you not looking for it and that's a fact. Looks like my last message to you was deleted.
3:11 Yes, exactly. There are so many people who, but for dating apps, would never have had a first date with anyone. And I think dating is valuable life experience that we all deserve to have if we want. This is especially true for Queer or trans people who live in places where it is not safe to approach or flirt with your preferred type.
I’m just at the beginning! On the flip side, I don’t know if I want to meet someone drunk in a club! Is that what I want my relationship and partnership to look like? Not saying for people who have met partners going out it’s like this, just pointing out that those narratives can be flipped
When speaking about the running club and you said you would not want to walk because you are so competitive but then would then need an ambulance to take you to the hospital. I felt that to my core! 😂😂😂
Woman who are always getting a traction from men. Can't believe that there are women who actually don't get approached or rarely get approached. They just can't find them that. I'll take you out and if you tell them that's such experience. They won't gas like you. I have a lot of pretty friends lot of pretty cousins. They wouldn't understand even I don't find Myself to be ugly. There's something about that is not quite what it is
Loved your compassionate take on this. I could NEVER be a content creator because my anxiety would be through the roof. I honestly feel bad for content creator/influencers when they’re being dog piled on because I could see myself also crashing out in that scenario
Stephanie. You are an exceptional storyteller, an orator even. I love this platform that you've built for yourself, but please don't lose sight of the possibility that you could be destined for an even bigger platform, you could serve an even bigger audience. Your humour, authenticity and articulation are unmatched. I'm going to keep watching just to see how far you fly.
Sounds like when you " crashed out " from being attacked repeatedly for over a year for sharing your life experience. You were accused of asking the internet to perform emotional labor with just sharing you e personal experiences, that no one believed. It was awful to see you rejected like that and having to seek therapy just to continue to work.
But your friend whose perspective was, “do you really wanna meet guys like that” is also saying, no one wants to meet someone who needs an app to connect. And you are communicating to here that you are “like that” so clearly she is not evolve enough, and aware enough to understand the depth of her own feelings. Because if she is truly empathizing with you then she can easily empathize with anyone who is in your situation, man or woman. So her judgement of “men like that” raises questions about her, maybe unconscious perspectives, about you.
Oh you are sooooo deep in your Content Creator Consultant/Coaching bag with this one!!! But per usual, a lot of things you said can also be applied to life in general!
I have a regular job, but I can relate to avoiding the emotional outbreaks being important. Sometimes I feel butthurt and lash out at a client and I almost always regret it. It's usually better to maintain professionalism and just vent to a coworker 😅 as much as I think yelling at some dumb client will feel satisfying
You have perfectly articulated what I have been thinking about content creators and influencers for quite some time. Many do not acknowledge the price levels and advantages they have been afforded based on certain privileges (pretty privilege, featuring, colorism, and societal biases). They are often fighting against or benefitting from larger societal barriers than they would like to admit.
Unfortunately, I have watched several content creators refer to viewers as “broke” based on a handful of less than stellar comments. As a viewer, but not often a subscriber to their channel, it’s an off putting thing to say. Especially considering the current economic climate.
Your definition of crashing out is most consistent with what is meant by burn out. Crashing out indicates that someone is acting in such a way that it can be said to be self-sabotaging. It starts from burn out but is worsened because an individual behaving in such as a way that not only are they not helping themself, they are actually making things worse. But also, I think you are missing a lot of context with Fannta and how she went on a sponsorship trip with a company known for not treating individuals of color fairly. I have never followed her, she gives me flashbacks of the girls that used to bully me as a kid, but her behavior of late has been erratic relatively speaking when compared to her usual demeanor. The girl is clearly manic and she is crashing out. It is no surprise that she is comparig herself to Alix Earle as she has always been quite "white identified."
I never heard of this woman as I’m not on TT but your take, words of encouragement and or advice is spot on. Thank you. I needed to hear this message too.
I love your hair like that... you look so pretty in this video.. wish you would leave them wigs and weaves alone... them daym things mask your true beauty!
I like this video because it really puts everything in perspective. It is easy to get caught up in comparison and feel like we need more or should have more (even if its true) it helps to remember to be grateful for what we already have and to see it from a different perpective.
