get a matchmaker and some people that will be honest with you. I'm almost your age and I think that we need to start being honest with ourselves about why we haven't gotten what we want in life. I have a aunt that looks like you and have been married for over 35 years. I believe there is more to attraction than just the physical. based on some of your stories and just seeing a little of your personality through your videos I know what my first impression of you is and it's not that good. I like you because you're relatable. but if everyone tells you unicorns and rainbows, but don't tell you the truth, what good is that? I'm single and I know why.
So interesting fact a woman who has gone through menopause (although complicated) can carry a child to full term , they just can’t get pregnant the “old fashion way” she could still try with a different sperm from her spouse and do IVF
The problem with manifestation is that the man has to be manifesting the same thing that you want. So you can believe all you want in the traditional marriage you’re manifesting, but that doesn’t mean there’s a man out there manifesting you. That’s why it’s far easier to manifest a good job; the company is “manifesting” a good employee like you, so it’s an energetic match. Same thing with college; the college wants a good student, and here you are. Another energetic match. But what man is manifesting marriage in the same way you want it such as an equitable partnership, doing chores, not cheating, working things out, providing for and protecting, etc.? The men who want what the woman wants have no problem “manifesting” that marriage.
I love your videos. I'm 26 but have never had any options myself for dating, so it helps to hear your side bc a lot of it resonates. I'm the one who's never chosen, and I also just have had a rough beginning, but relationships are something I've actually been thinking about. Not much hope for myself but it helps to have a more realistic perspective from others.
This is a really great video. I’ve felt the same as you. Never got a break in terms of love. I can make every other relationship work from friends to family to jobs, but never been able to meet the right man, and I’m not gonna subject myself to anymore evil.
Hi Steph, have you ever considered therapy ? It might be helpful to know more about the blueprint you're not aware of, but keep on following. Also, knowing more about attachment styles, and Who's pulling your strings (breaking the cycle of manipulation) could be helpful.
This may be ignorant I’m 23 but I don’t understand you don’t look 40 you look 33 why don’t u just move through life like ur 33? Like even lie to urself you’re so beautiful even my boyfriend said so and have a perfect body and smile and ur smart. U should marry a single father
Lets be honest girl. Men gain much more benefit from relationships that women do, especially as we age. Women give much more than men do after that post menopause time. Cleaning, cooking, managing the household/appts., managing the money and reutement accounts, hospice care for men that took poor care of their bodies and also sex. What do women get? Companionship? We can get that cheaper from friends without all the extra obligations
Believe in God for the impossible! I know the dating pool feels bleak but never stop believing in what God can do. He doesn’t play about you. Your wants and desires matter to Him.
I love this for you Stephanie . Your take on this is very refreshing . I have taken an extended break from dating but I foolishly fell into the worst relationship in my life when I felt societal pressure to marry and reproduce. Never again. I say the serenity prayer a lot now . What will be will be. I am focused on the things I can control.
Loved the video! San Juan looks gorgeous! Edit to add: As, a solo, single, Black woman traveler myself, I love watching your travel vlogs. Not only do I enjoy your destinations (and I am usually also on a budget 😂), I love your "yapping" commentary, because I feel like what you have to say is so relatable. All of your videos just make me feel so seen. Thank you!
It's weird to see the generation above mine, be surprised about this and find out for the first time. You would think younger people Gen z, would be more surprised but I think we were exposed to dark s*** very young. Scorpio has the ability to see heaven and hell, what do you think humans usually pick? There are a lot more tolerable Scorpios than there are diddy diddler Scorpios, but usually it's kind of subtly tough to deal with with every single Scorpio person. Pluto in Sagittarius generation just love to investigate. As a person with trauma those babies are having an awakening and dark night of the soul now and later. Children are very aware, you can train a child but that child is aware and it's unconscious brain everything that is being done to it.
Your experiences are so relevant, and youre not alone. What ive learned about men is they are not capable of caring bc they dont even care about themselves, only what feels good to them in that exact moment. Not all men there are some good ones out there. And there are men that are not "bad" but arent emotionally honest or available...and at some pt its too draining to spend months and years waiting for them to heal esp when they make no effort to.
Here i am looking at stephanie, like you doing better than me sis. Im 40 and always thought dating would just happen like it happens for other women. Nope. Never did. Men dont approach and the ones that do have some facial deformity (not just ugly) like burned, missing eyes, ears amd they like....me. its either that or their they have no ambition, drive or emotional maturity. Im not even dating...which all i want now. Ive done the self building for yhe last 40 years.
I was in a prior relationship for 13 years. Was single for 3 years. Met my now boyfriend. Both desired to date for marriage. He’s 30 & I’m 36. He’s a good black man that owns his own house, car, job, believe in God, not abusive, don’t smoke or drink, don’t gamble or club, No kids, no priors or felonies, Enjoys providing & protecting, he strongly desires to be fully committed, monogamy & fidelity. Something beautiful to hear a man consulted God first about me and feels he found his wife but willing to take time & properly build. It’s been a year now and this man expresses genuine love & care for me everyday. Don’t give up. God heard your prayer. Gods timing is perfect timing. ❤
Im so confused about your dating life..... We look exactly the same except I am a bit younger and I would even argue that you are way prettier than me .... but ive never been without a boyfriend/ men who take care of me ( This is not a flex). Im so perplexed.
well. despite not having children the love you have when you have animals is just as rewarding for me. my children are grown now ans I had the same dogs for 16 years. my kids knew my dogs were my children. Truest unconditional love when you have that bond with a pet. So cute how you mother them and pick them up like babies. They even have their lunch box and home made meals and go to daycare. too cute
I met my exhusband at 27, got married and he promised me a family. Well, he was the infertile one. Most women don’t think about that. I was ok with it. I had an abortion at 19 with my first love before I met my husband. I’m glad it happened because I’m happy without a baby. My miscarriage at 45 after IVF was a blessing. I thought I was gonna be devastated than I was, and I wasn’t. I realized I probably wanted a baby because of social pressure. I was an Aunt at 9. I have 20 nieces and nephews and great nieces and nephews. I’m the 2 youngest of my 7 siblings so I’ll be the last to go so I’ll have lots of care givers.
Luckily for me I have never been attracted to anyone so I have never participated nor have had any interest in doing so. I observed that it was nothing but fornication and I'm not interested in giving my body away for life. I have also observed all my friends/family went away once they became involved with someone and reappeared once it went sour. Everyone I know who has been in relationships have developed some kind of trauma and I think it's because society is Gung ho about romance rather than respecting people in general. Everyone is not meant to be in relationships, we can't even look at each other as brother or sisters but we think we will flourish as husband and wife? Now looking back it's laughable and I'm glad to have preserved myself.
Yep! I'm 44 and someone once asked me why I didn't get married, so looked them dead in the eye and said "because I didn't get picked". It sounds so harsh but it's absolutely true. There have been times where I've bent over backwards trying to be the perfect woman, the best girlfriend whatever and it wasn't good enough. The things that men said they couldn't do or wouldn't commit to when they were with me, suddenly they could do it for the next woman after me. No amount of self-care, losing weight, leveling up etcetera was going to make these particular men change their mind about me. I just wasn't the one. And yet, in many instances the woman they dated after me was an absolute hot mess and had more problems that I ever did, but somehow he was able to be her knight in shining armor. It's the luck of the draw, And when you know, you know🤷
@@modernhumanity7 i didn't chase anyone...these men asked to me in a relationship w/ me at the time. You are assuming that men are 100% honest and transparent with their intentions from the start, which they definitely are not 🤣I broke up with them when I realized he was just wasting my time.
@@LadyNightsong I totally agree that some men are not transparent. I just wonder how much time it takes one to realize that and how many times you have to go through it. I just find it hard to believe it happened over and over again until decades had passed. I’m not fully BLAMING you, I understand full well that it’s a struggle out there… it just begs the question.
@@modernhumanity7 in an ideal world people wouldn't play games, manipulate, etc. In an ideal world nobody would come from a background of trauma or have mental health issues that prevent them from being able to detect red flags ASAP. The internet likes to think that every woman automatically has men wanting to marry her just because she's young or pretty, but as a disabled person, it's not as easy as that.
@@LadyNightsong Idk. I’m just hearing a lot of excuses. Don’t get me wrong, there are definitely manipulative women and men out there. They tend to show their true colors within 1-6 months of knowing them. It takes a few times being burned to learn to spot the red flags and to then act on your observations. I think you saw the red flags but chose to ignore them. Nobody’s perfect! I’m definitely not.
I’m 39, widowed and I’m pretty much where you are mentally with dating. The specifics of the things I need and what my standards are have led me to just put it in God’s hands. I’m not going to exhaust any more resources for dating.
I love your channel!! Your channel and talks helped me through one of the worst jobs I ever had. I always had you in one earbud and pushed through the workday haha. Please don’t stop posting!
As a RU-vidr, you are my hands down favorite RU-vidr! I think because my content is so specific and I feel like I can’t ever deviate, making me feel like a cog in the wheel. Purpose burnout is real and I’ve seen it other people, where they slow down, pop back up, slow down again and eventually just stop. I’m hoping not to stop!
I say this with love but please go to therapy and if you're in therapy please get a new one. You basically created a video and talked for over an hour about how you're unworthy of love. This is beyond sad. Yes, luck plays apart but no matter how you look, where you live, education, health or background you're still worthy of finding a quality partner that loves you and treats you with respect. Please don't take it as criticism but please work on your self esteem.
She just overcomplicates it so much and has painted such a 1-sided story. I don't understand how someone meets so many supposedly wrong men and goes on so many supposedly bad dates without doing some introspection and asking WHY?
Love that green dress on you. ❤ Have you ever thought of trying red hair like a Cranberry or magenta colour ? I think that would look so pretty on you 😁
My dating life was great in my 40s. Sometimes I was going on 2 dates a day. I remember sitting across from this Black french guy on a date in a little cafe thinking “This is why they do it!” So many interesting people and experiences. I started using a formula when it came to online dating and it got me closer and closer to what I was looking for. Then one day at 45 I met my husband. We got married twice. Once a small ceremony with his parents then a larger ceremony on my birthday on the beach. I do think some universal forces came together to make this happen for us. I also think it could not have happened earlier for either one of us.
I heard this European American man say on IG that women should approach dating like we're job hunting. Just because we had a bad experience doesn't mean we should stop looking & stop dating.
I have reached the same conclusion. A number of so called “good men” are immature and acting in bad faith. I’m a lovely human being and I don’t deserve it. Modern dating is undignified.
