Dont date single mother - Philippines 

Another problem is a single mon could be ready to end the relationship and extort money out of you by saying you did something inappropriate to a kid. That's the biggest thing that scares me away from single moms.

Hard pass. Not interested in marriage. Not interested in children. Money is not the issue. I value mobility. Picking up and going anywhere in the world. Can’t do that with a child.

One thing to think about is that a 20 something year old single Filipina will probably want kids later on, so then you go through the whole thing from the beginning, or else she may find someone else that will deal with that. My personal situation is a widowed single mother with an older child. I find single mothers are way more matured emotionally than single girls. I have had experience with both situations.

I noticed Filipino society seem to look down on a single mom where western men don't seem to do so.. I don't seem to have a problem dating a single mom...I have an issue dating a woman who lies about her children claiming they belong to her sister...

Paul made a very good point , if you break up you will never see the kid/ kids again.. And remember that she had broken up with the father.

My baseline is no kids, no tattoos, no smoking. If she is truly exceptional, I mean an 11, maybe...

I had a vasectomy over 30 years ago.......for ONE reason.

It's the most important decision humans make who to have children with get it right and it can be wonderful get it wrong and it can destroy your whole life and cost you emotionally your whole life

There is a law in PH that minors cannot be alone with someone who is not family. This means the GF/mother can never leave the house to go shopping and leave the kid with the BF/foreigner. If an envious neighbor reports that, it means jail time by law. Are foreigners aware of this? How is this dealt with?

Based on a recent study by the World Health Organization (WHO), Philippines has about 15 million solo parents, or more than 14 million of whom are women. That's a lot of single or solo mothers!

My experience married to Filipina wife with daughter has been a great thing for me personally . We go on lots of family holidays , i have been able to help her for her school since she was young and now university studies ..Our family was always complete no issues apart from the usual. My daughter is very respectful too.

No your to far down her important list her kids her mum and dad then if you are very very lucky you

Great video! I really like the gentleman debate format of two respected people discussing topics. It’s more informative.

you should definitely date a single mom, just make sure you have more kids then her

A lot of foreigners came to Philippines because no one even take them from their own country. But after all its the intention of your heart.

I chose to not end up with a single mum, I dated many before I settled with the one girl. They will always look at the child over you and I always felt if I am going to have a child in my life it should be mine, I have 3 daughters from a previous marriage in Australia, we separated by the time the girls were in their teens so the impact wasn't as bad. Now I am with a Filipina the last thing I want is another guy's child or children. Now I am with a Filipina who has no children and her parents have since passed away, she ticks all the boxes, I was lucky to find her, the two things that can be a burden on us foreigners meeting these young Filipina.

I tried being a Bachelor tourist for awhile, it got old fast. I'm a 64 year old widower, father, grandfather. I've adopted a Filipina and her 5 kids. Is it expensive ? Yes and it can be down right annoying at times but it feels right.

Seeing how you both are in your 50's you've kinda boxed yourselves in. You both know damn well a filipina her 20's and 30's that doesn't have a child is going to want one no matter what she tells you. If she's in her 40's with grown kids well, do you really want a menopausal filipina GF when so many young ones are available ? And you've already eliminated young single mothers - so what's left ?

I dated a Single Mother one time. The girl was educated, had a great job, but literally with the house and the BMW, didn't have grocery money (I'm not kidding). So I buy her two kids and my Kid a huge chicken dinner. I sat there and listened to her daughter talk shit about me and recommend other Men who her Mom should date. American Women.

My misses has 3 kids and we have been together for 6 year + now. Both points of view are valid . I have been accepted as 'dad' and all is cool. The father is dead and was before we met. There is additional cost for sure but I look at them as my family tbh. The youngest was 6 when we got together the eldest is now 16. It is a gamble as is life .....but worked out great for me so far !

If you're an older guy who doesn't want any more kids, and the woman is of child bearing age, maybe it's better that she already has one. That way you're not depriving her of her right to have kids, and maybe she won't leave you just to have a child with another guy.

I think "pitfalls" would be the word Paul is looking for.

34 dislikes were single moms

The first time she says, my kids, you better believe it's going to be kids, cause up comes my walls for family values...I'm gone and done

Dr. Helen Fisher's research seems pertinent here. Some have what she calls the Builder personality that must have a family (they also tend to be religious, etc). I have none of the Builder trait. I have huge difficulty finding a STEM career oriented Pinay who doesn't want kids. Thought I found that once, but she just wanted the green card. Peace.

The economic hardship , recession , unemployment and the loss of job caused by covid pandemic is enough to push people into financial ventures .

As a father of 5, now grown, agree w Paul. You are taking on a huge burden of responsibility, not just for another adult, but for developing children that pile on the needs both emotional and financial. Complications w relationships and putting yourself at a disadvantage in many ways make it is much harder for most guys especially if you are older and have not had kids before. That said, some make it work like Steve -Vlogger of “Philippine info channel” in Cavite. I would ask him. But Paul makes important points here.

Sooooooo many choices for dating Filipinas! But why pick a mom? Hard pass.

Never raise another man’s children. Never. Have your own children or don’t, but don’t raise a child that will be taken away at a moments notice.

Interesting topic, but you missed the most important point about being involved with a single mother. You'll always come second to her kids. Her kids will always be her priority and you'll be useful if you help to support her and her family. Most single mothers are looking for someone to support their families above all. If that's fine for you, that's great, but just remember what her priorities are.

I dated a Filipina in the US for months who was a widow and had three children in their late teens/early twenties. I am the exception, as over three years later we are happily married. Her kids are very well adjusted and overall the pressures to help her extended family are minimal. Thank you for the excellent video.

If you are in a relationship in part to be with someone who will take care of you in your elderly years then it may not be too much to ask that you accept the responsibility of a single mom’s family. Each of us in our particular circumstances have to figure out how to balance those needs/desires and obligations. I’ve never had kids. My wife’s daughter lives with my wife’s mom in the village. By the time we move to the village the daughter will be in her teenage years. The daughter is just a part of the overall financial liability of marrying into a family. The daughter and I are not particularly close because she doesn’t live with us and she doesn’t speak English. It is a circumstance I can accept.

He is absolutely right about kids !

Thank you guys. It takes courage to make a video that is straight down to earth with facts that are true, knowing that a lot of females will dislike you for it. A single mother should take care financial care of her kid.. at least regularly. Sometimes helping each other (Financial or otherwise) is necessary. However, some woman think that there is no mutual help. This, there is no team. Is her, herself, and she. (On top of that she may try to add asamu family members as the man will allow ). Just do not fall in love. Is a business transaction.

Lots of good points guys,I've been there done that.

I was a widowed man with two young children. 16 years ago I got remarried to a single filipina mother. She became a fantastic step mom to my kids, and I've raised her little girl as my own. I'm not very familiar with this channel, but it seems the guy with the purple tshirt has had a negative experience with a single filipina mom. I'd like people to know not everyone has a negative experience with a single filipina mom. To be honest , the guy seems very selfish , perfection does not exist in the Philippines or in the west. If you truly love the woman you should accept, and if she truly loves you, she will accept all your baggage and issues also. If all you want is a girlfriend to tour the islands with, then kids are probably not a great idea, those extra, ferry and bus tickets can add up. 😁

I NORMALLY Like the Videos you 2 Guys Put Out. However you 2 FAILED to Mention 2 HUGE Dangers of Dating Filipina Single Moms ... Checking their CENOMARs to MAKE SURE They're NOT MARRIED, AND the Philippine LAW that States you can NEVER be ALONE with her Children. THOSE 2 'Issues' are HUGE, and WAYYYY MORE IMPORTANT Than Complicating your Life and the EXTRA EXPEN$E$ and "Feelings" Associated with Dating a Single Mom. THOSE 2 ISSUES CAN GET YOU THROWN IN JAIL!!!

An interesting topic Paul and certainly a thought provoker. It is something I do have a bit of an internal struggle with, however if I was as confident as I could be about the girl being the "right one", I know that I would need to make concessions and accept the package deal. For many reasons no children obviously presents a far better option in terms of freedom to travel, dinner out etc. I am an older man so I wonder if a single mum is not a better option than a girl who wants children, from the simple basis of is it fair for me to father a child I may not be around to watch grow to a mature age. So,,, did you make my decision easier? No,, but you sure gave me a lot of things I seriously need to give consideration to. Great topic and once again a good video Paul. Thank you

All relationships have an element of give and take. There should be some balance between what each partner brings into the relationship. Taking on a woman with children and all that comes with her situation, would tip the scales in the wrong direction for me.

Thanks Paul for good information here; you’ve another subscriber here

DONT DO IT. The husband will be introduced as her cousin and move him in with the rest of the family.

It’s an interesting discussion, with valid points on both sides. Like most relationships, there are pros and cons, and each relationship can be different. Living there full time, or just visiting there two or three times a year, also changes the dynamics, both re dating and having a gf with a kid. Two things to consider, the single mom can be a great loving partner, but her child if young, will be her priority, as it should be. Secondly, if the girl is young, and she doesn’t have a kid, in the vast majority of cases, she will want one at some stage. I’ve dated single moms, and had great times, …be aware, but keep an open mind.

Hi mate, I wouldn't disagree with anything you say, except for, I looked for a single mum, the right one of course, and I always wanted to have kids, but got a bit older and couldn't see myself wanting babies. For sure I would make a life with the right person, certain limitations of course, can't have ex anywhere in sight, gotta be able to trust and accept her family as well, if you're not up for what it means to do what I have done, don't do it. But myself, never regretted the journey with the awesome lady, kids and family, better than I ever expected. But it takes wise choices too.

This …two friend Chat over coffee ☕️ …is a good venue for your videos 👍🏼

I prefer women closer to my own age which means 40 plus. Children of such women are usually grown and on their own.

I've dated a single mother once. However she did bring a lot more to the table, than the other woman I've dated. Having said that, never again.

Please use good quality mics for outdoor. This would really help my ears. 😅

One issue I've dealt with in dating single Mothers is the kids become attached very quickly. Not trying to brag, but it seemed to me their children (even toddlers) sensed right away that I'm a grounded, stable and reasonably confident guy who wasn't just fun loving, but, unlike their Mother, could exercise much more grace under pressure...to remain cool when/if the sh*t hit the fan. IMO, single Mother raised children are starving for that feeling of secure homeostasis that a solid Man brings to their world. This makes them fall in love with you quite quickly, which, understandably, can make breakups quite painful.

I dated a couple single Filipinas with children will never do that again

I was with a single mom of 3...I was a single dad for years... Now my kids are grown and I had no problems with my gf kids they respected me and They are grateful for the new life I helped them to have. Im 58 so no more kids for me.

Enjoyed your video Paul. Liked your recent one on common law relationships too. What about a video on child support in the Philippines, whether your own child or as step dad? Best wishes.

Its ok to date a single mother in the philippines as long as they were not married., because there is no divorce in the philippines. its illegal to get divorced.

Risk reward. The risks outweigh the reward in most cases. There are exceptions. If you love children and enjoy having a family a Filipina with one child when she was very young could be a good choice. If the Filipina has several children perhaps she's made seriously bad decisions and that may continue.

i dated a few Filipina but i have found i prefer Cambodian, Vietnamese, and Chinese mainly because I can work in their countries during non-covid 19 times. Then I can spend time getting to know the girl rather than have to deal with long-distance relationships.

You did not mention the " mama bear " syndrome. When the kid do something wrong, you can't discipline the kid and than you ask her to do so, and she wouldn't do it. That is annoying.

Good to see you online Paul you getting a good tone building biceps

I married one. We were both single parents. The only plus left is the step son. My daughter from the first go, is and has been hostel from age five. My son from the second try, is an SJW and is on the other side of the American disagreement. The stepson is the only bright spot. I’m eagerly awaiting your common law marriage video. If the PI ever opens to Yankees, and I doubt it will if ever, I think temporary relations with women will be the norm. I doubt the truthfulness of any of them anymore.

Good morning Paul and Gio from valenzuela 😃…. Depensa the situation…. Well for me I’m happy a single mom 14years and i am proud to be a single mom ☺️,It’s hard to be a single mom but i am blessed i have a son 14years old. And never been married… At my age 35getting old i am happy single mom just saying. ☺️ Stay happy keep going and happy life because no one is perfect. Life is to short.☺️ Keep safe stay healthy You and mia and gio… 😃

Single mothers should be avoided like the BUBONIC plague.

There are lots of young single moms in the Philippines. There may be more of them than there are girls without a kid, or kids. When I was in my late teens and early 20s I knew some local girls who had kids. Never stopped me from getting naked with them. Anyway, I suppose it's preferable that they don't have kids, but I wouldn't let it stop me if I like them well enough.

Sure kids can be inconvenient. But with a non-mother you have to worry about her biological clock making her not satisfied with the life you provide her. On the other hand, if you support a single mom, then if you chose her carefully then you get an extra level of appreciation and love from the mom and her child also.

I do agree with the points made here - getting involved with a single mom with young kids is a non-starter for me (I did this once, we lived together for a couple years and I paid for a lot of things....only to have it end and she moved out of my home). By the time I reach retirement and land in PH, the young 20-somethings probably don't want much to do with me as I will be near 60. This is where a Filipina who is a bit older may be what I seek....and if she had her kids at a young age they may be near (or at) adulthood and ready to start their own life.....a totally different single mom scenario which I would be open to.

you know guys, when it comes to a relationship or to get with woman because she has kids or not, it all comes down to who and what a person is willing to deal with, me i will not date a single mother, but i have had no kids and would not mind having my own family, but i have dated a single mother before and it did not work out, but maybe cause of me never having kids, so i think if a man has had kids already then it should not be to much of a big deal to him, but also it all depends on the woman that is a single mother, not all women are good or bad, just like men we are all different, so this is something people need to take into consideration, when looking for a mate, but no matter which way a person chooses to go, there are always pros and cons, to any decision we make, single mother or no single mother all depends on the man, i understand the pros and cons of dating single mothers, as well as dating any women, i think the best way to choose a mate is by how the person is on the in side, not just by how they look on the out side ok, i think by people just choosing a person by how they look on the out side and not thinking of how that person is on the in side, has really played a lot into what is happening in the world now with people, divorce in the states is at a all time high with women filing for divorce by 80%, this should tell everyone something ok, as well as marriages are on the down cline, this also should be telling everyone something, more and more people are choosing to stay single and not marry, what do people think this will do to the world and our society as a whole, not good i can tell you that, plus all of us American men do know how it is in the west, when it comes to women, all of us have been thru the same BS, with American women and are sick and tired of it too, but we should not do like men did in the west, do better this time think of who you would mate with on how that woman is on the in side and her values, i meet a Filipino woman online and yes her values are like the same us mine, so yea talk about getting lucky here, but you also need to as a man put your self out there, in a really good value way, but this also depends on how you are as a man on the in side, like i went on a dating site Filipinocupid and one of the first things i said, i was looking for a woman with old traditional values, know what that means, but also i put between the age of 18 to 27, i did this for a reason ok, because of what i know about women, plus on what i was looking for in a woman, all this comes into play after a while Gio you had a very beautiful GF at one time, sorry it did not work out, but keep in mind some times it is not just the woman who was at fault ok, i do not know the facts about that relationship, but i can tell you it takes 2 to tangle ok, bu to better understand why relationships do work or do not work out, is for a person to reflect on that relationship and look at what went wrong and why, most of the time it is because of a personal conflict, this is why i always tell people to be careful of who you decide to mate with, talk to one another, ask questions like, hey what do you think about bedroom fun be fore marriage, if a woman does that before marriage she does not have old traditional values, yea asking questions is not wrong or bad, you need to get a feel for that person ok, well i hope this helps i could keep going on, but i think you get my point, be safe and careful.

Taking on a ready made family with kids that aren’t your own, recipe for disaster, not all the time but still risky

Such a honest talk .. rare … really respect hones opinions like this . Best filippines video so far i. 3 years

What is wrong with marriage with a 44 year old single mom that has two kids that are both over 20 and have their own lives. I am 69 and a single father with two adult kids.

Yes you need to know what you want !

Moms are usually more stable. They will stick it out to maintain stability. Kidless women can be more flighty, skate at the first time of trouble.

Hi Paul and Gio, Really good video. Of course both of you are right. The other side of this is the children could be hidden away. Best wishes, Cheers mike

really appreciate your opinions, some good thoughts to consider

great

Hmmm, Gio is now dating a single mom, but it’s been awhile, so i assume he’ll move to a new gf soon.

Question most young girl without kids want to have kids maybe they say they don't but as time goes on there going to want have kids that's why if they have one kid around 7 to 10 and u don't want to have anymore kids

You should automatically know the date and a woman with kids is a package deal

what if the women has 2 kids from 2 different dads? is that a red flag?

If you guys are having problem or worried about dating Pilipina women. There's a easy solution to it. Go back where you came from and take your time to find that especial someone. Don't stress out yourselves trying to find a woman in Asia. First of all, there's no perfect marriage. It's always full of compromises. Making too much comments about us doesn't help. If you have too many questions in your minds. Move on somewhere else.

No way to take responsibility For anybody.s ,kids Not a 60 and above Most of us are 60 or above. Try did not worked Never again Paul your bloody So truefull. And clear about it, Hi. Gio. Nice to see yous 2 together again Forza. Italia ,

one thing i can say about moms is that theyre usually WAY more grown up than the other girls.

I am like, "Duh." Single mothers are the epitome of what "baggage" is, whether in Philly or anywhere else in the world. Loading the baggage into your life is hard, but also, as noted in 5:37 - 5:45, just to unload it requires a heavier lift.

Hey Paul, hi, how are you? During this blog/video, you brought up a very interesting point about us ex-pats knowing how difficult it can be, to break up with a Filipina. Well, many of us including myself, do not know how difficult that can be. When you have time, could you and Mia put together a blog/video, that discusses that very subject in detail? I have watched your videos, and you and Mia make a very great team. Is the two you could put a video together, that discusses the difficulties of breaking up with a Filipina, it would be invaluable for us, that are getting ready to come over to the Philippines. Especially, a video/blog, coming from you and Mia, because the both of you would be able to give us a really great perspective, coming from a Filipina, as well as an ex pat. Thank you so much, keep up the great work, and I hope that you and Mia last forever, you are a great couple. God bless, Pete.

how did it all go that time you married a single mom?

This discussion is about counting how much money the guys will spend when living with ladies who have kids already I guess it doesn't have to discuss in public

Don’t do it. Too many reasons not to.

Paul, you have your perspective and valid points. From a further overview side of things. A single mom with 1 well behaved child and the father completely out of the picture may be something to consider. Even a childless young Filipina is going to want your support for her family. Another reason is you had kids already and you don’t want to have another baby with your young Filipina that will undoubtedly want a child in a LTR. So a single mom can be ok without having additional children and not feel like she never met her maternal need. If your a guy that’s ok starting a new family, a Filipina without children is a better choice for a LTR.

A sexual attack on me by an attractive women would have been at least something Paul but sadly it was not :D

Paul is very rational. But i agree if u cant have kids or already have kids single mum is the a great choice.

Ne has 5 grown girls and not one of them wants her to be with their dad. They saw him get drunk & beat her while she provided for them, His mommy takes care of her 48-year-old son when he spends all his money on booze and gambling.

How can you say dangerous? Not all Filipinos marry foreigners because of security. How about you? What is your purpose or intention to live-in a Filipina is it for a helper ? Clean after you. Take care of you . Sex mate? Explain it. Because I am sure you have reasons are they good intentions for the other party? Or your selfish intentions.

While I agree that you have every right to your opinions, please remember that there are a dozen different perspectives when it comes to dating and creating a lifelong and loving relationship with a Filipina. As a 64 year old committed to a life in the US, my approach to what I am looking for is so different than a 42 year old man who plans on spending their life in the Philippines. Neither are wrong but they are polar opposites in what we are seeking when it comes to a future partner/wife.

No sloppy seconds for me. Sorry. That's a big no no. 😬

i have 2 own adult kids from my late thai wife. having a new woman who has a child its not a issue for me. i know how to take care. but there is another big issue. most single womens with kids are still married in the phils. even they say, have no connection with her husband for long time, how can you be sure ? the issue is that you dating a married woman, and thats the law problem. thats could be danger, can bring you to jail there. and these single (married) women looking only for somebody who pay for, most say, i don't want to have another child. so what you are ? only good enough for support. i chat actually with a single married woman. she say she has no connections with her husband since 23 y. 3 y ago she got pregnant from a another filipino. this finally break. now she is looking for a guy for support and compagnion. she say, sex she doesn't need. the anulment of her marriage is to expensive she said. i have more problems with her attitude. finally i would be only a supporter. thats keep me away from her inside my heart. for such a case, better stay alone. i m anyway critical to most.

Date only! No relationship!

Widdows are a different story. It' a not their fault, for becoming single.

As a man gets older, the ability to date non-mothers gets harder and harder. If you really want to do that, go to a Western country or a place like Hong Kong where the fertility rate is much lower than in the Philippines. The proportion of women without children in the Philippines drops to almost zero by the late 30s.

Young philippinas don't have serious options. Option 1 is starving, option 2 is stay with old westerner. Why not mention this? What about you are in your 50s and 60s and when your child needs you most you are almost dead and buried? Going with a too young girl is not really healthy and is kind of selfish because it solves your immediate problems (loneliness, sex, ...) but not hers. This doesn't mean you shouldn't have a hot young gf, but certainly you should really think hard about the meaning of relationship for you and hers and confront her opinion with yours. What about taking out of the equation the following: Children (single moms) Age (young, middle aged, old) Origin (province or city) Look (hot or not) Education (educated or not) Wealth (rich poor) Etc. What about that? Why not talk about love rather than all this bs talk about single moms? It seems you always put love and feelings at the end, as if it was not important. Why not discuss about the fact that in most cases young philippinas stay with older westerners only because they improve the quality of their lives. What kind of relationship is that?

fathers do not take care of kids there are mothers who take care of everything he does and then let the wife have the money

I dont know where yee live in the Philippines but in Cebu province its pretty hard to find a Filipina over 21 who doesnt have kids. So is the solution to go younger or older? 😆

I take it on a case by case basis. If i like the girl and as long as she is honest about having a child and she is able to make time to meet me than i will accept the bastard child. However i will make it clear that when it comes time for inheritance i will only leave property to a child I am directly related too. If i do not have that then any money or property i acquire will be willed to the Russian government.

woman with kids......are you sure if she loves you ????? or she loves your money....playing a game with you certainly......

Daisy is a rong name here myn name is Magnús