Whenever you open up to a woman, she will tell you that you can trust her. Then whenever times are no longer good, she will use anything you told her against you in a heartbeat.
Damn right! Married 22 years then she cheated and has exploited everything she can to try and extract money. You'd think after 22 years you could have total trust! Ive kept *her* secrets though.
Opening up to women has for me personally not been successful, even more, it was detrimental in one of my relationships because I showed my weak side. She lost respect quickly and completely turned on me.
Yeah i have been complitely open with several girls shared some of my weaknesses and being vurneable in front of them. Never did me any favors. Now i have learned the hard way that blind honesty is not good in relationships. I actually regret it much since they propably shared all that i shard with their girl companions.
@@ashuranero5721 Well you get rid Of them but there is a change they start gossiping about you. And worst case scenario they exaggerate what they learn about you.
True. Its normal to take some things for granted after a while. A great quality relationship is one were you can speak about those things and develop a strategy on how to deal with those issues.
It’s hilarious, 99% of woman’s profiles from dating sites say no games but when someone is honest they constantly play the ridiculous games you point out here
there's the potential to be manipulative/ having a mask Think about women's gaming/manipulation books 'How to get what you want' etc. -She'll act like a girl that is genuinely intrested, manipulating the target. Let's say you can't tell one from the other. (meaning the mask and play is on point) You can only tell, when it all comes out, when the persona already got what he wanted/ took away from you But then, it's too late...
@@spqr1945 But she can't lock him down... so she wants to try other types of men... hence the "no games" stipulation, but only for you. She'll be playing games till the day she dies.
#4 is Gold. I have 4 sisters... they've given me the WORST advice when it comes to dating. THE WORST! It's always pie-in-the-sky fairy tale fantasies they regurgitate as "advice". Real women aren't attracted to nice guys who hold the door open for them.
Yup, I thought I was the only one saying it. Because when I talk to women about this very thing, from young to very old, they continue to insist I don't know what I'm talking about and women know more about men than men do. Then they proceed to tell me men should do things that are entirely advantageous to women and don't even take men into consideration.
Just be yourself -Wrong! Express your feelings, women are very emotional so they will really relate to that - Wrong! I've heard both of these directly from women.
@@donnydomingo9962 "Just be yourself" is very well justified. High quality women will see through your acting quite quick. They are better at acting anyway, so they'll beat you. also, I don't get what's wrong with holding the door open - outside of the USA ofcourse.
My sisters were amazing, I used them to check me and her friends bodylanguage as I tried my game on them. I took them clubbing, using them as my scouts. My sister was my best wing person haha
I’m a lesbian but I think this guy just turned me straight. Thank you so much for putting men’s thoughts and feelings into words. Everything you say is 100% accurate.
6: is dead on women have no idea how hard it is being an average guy trying to just get the attention of an average woman. Their heads would explode within the first hour
@@alvarosilva523 but there's the biggest issue tho MOST women think and believe they ARE high quality. Even tho they have 3 to 5 kids from 3 to 5 different men and work at Walmart not hatin on em you gotta do what you gotta do but they strait up DEMAND and say they DESERVE the Jason Momoa's, the Chris Hemsworths, Channing Tatums, and Labron James's even tho what exactly do they bring besides another guy/guys, kid/kids, boring conversation, and debt?
@@jaygage1555 Being a good mom to her kids is the mark of a high quality women. In the eyes of the man she had her kids with. I think that's the problem. Within society moms are high value, same as how a highly paid and skilled person holds value. Society's preferences are largely centered around women's security, needs and desires. They mistake this for SMV as they expect men feel the same way. But our needs are deviant in society's eyes which leaves them as "mysterious."
@@jaygage1555 Brad pitt, johnny Depp and George Cloony can't hold a relationship together, and they are the richest, most famous and best looking men, normal men have no chance.
If you most women cannot deal with basic HUMAN emotions, then you're just worthless in a psychological, social perspective. It's painfully sad and awful. And that applies with men AND women, either friends of partner.
9. Be kind when rejecting men, because it's a man's role to persue doesn't mean it's easy for us, and the major factor why women don't persue is because rejecting hurts their fragile ego.
As I travelled three continents within the last 4 years, I asked probly hundreds of pretty to beautiful / sexy girls and women from Europe, Asia and Oceania, about this whole approach stuff. Except for some Australians, NONE of them has ever been approached at daytime, only half-drunk idiot approaches are an experience for almost all of them. Just wanted to droo this one for all guys who think "She's so attractive, she gets so much masculin attention, I don't even need to try". No one ever tries on them. Not at daytime! :) Further I asked, if they don't have the wish to approach a man who catched their eyes. Surprisingly, they want! But guess, why they don't do! They are afraid. Beauties, all of us would consider at least a 9 are too scared to hit up a man, oftenly even in nightlife. Guys, them girls are only human :) so many same struggles that would not be nessessary
@@danielmeyer6994 A lot of men try, just not physically. But when a man does approach them in public, it can go 2 ways, and it usually is not the right way. I do not know where in Europe you went, but if you have visited the Netherlands, Amsterdam, you should know that women get approached a lot.
@@hemisheyes9865 True. It's why there is more drama within Female social circles, than Male social circles. It's ironic because Women are actually pressuring each other more than Men do to them, while also pressuring Men more than they do themselves. Very unfortunate. A shy woman is cute, a shy man is weak, and low value. It's
I think the 10 points in the list are very good. Sadly only a small percentage of the women will pay any attention to them and think their views are superior. But if we can get through to just a few women we have a chance at building a better society.
@@fiveleavesleft6521 Yeah... The fact that he has to explain that women should stop shaming normal healthy male behaviors and even just general human behaviors (when men exhibit them)... Is kinda proof of the dire straits we're in. I bet some crazy illogical feminists are getting triggered from this totally calm and reasonable video right now.
I'm a woman here, like he said in the beginning, sifting through all the conflicting information is very confusing. I am very grateful to finally be awake, it can be difficult to hear criticism, but it is necessary for growth. I am married and I see clearly that I have made many of the mistakes he mentions. We also have 3 daughters and I intend to teach them these truths. The way to life is narrow, but there is hope
@Global Man My, my, aren't we stooping to a new low? First of all, she is listening, and acting on what she's heard. Second, you're insulting an entire gender when you should be rationally explaining the flaws of a movement, or perhaps of societal norms. Basically, buddy, she's trying to help, and you're making things worse for yourself and her and... Well, this kind of attitude makes EVERYTHING worse.
This video is so much appreciated as I am in the same place as the young girl who contacted you. I'm taking all of those advices seriously and try to apply them in my everyday life. Thank you again.
I think the number 10 is the most important one for sure. Anyway he is right, but I an not sure how a female would look at this 10 points he made out, for me is more like if you focus on them,eventually everything else like small points , will turn into your advantage as a female and end up as a high quality women. I appreciate your commentary. Don’t pay attention to Kawhis, he may be a beta 😤.
being here gives you a huge headstart, in the area i am right now are just two kinds of women (i meet) those who became pregnant in no time - and the ugly ones. And most became pregnant just after a few weeks with their new boyfiend The treshhold to be considered 'a good one' was never as low...
#10 : Value The Male Contribution - My ex never once showed appreciation or said "thank you". I paid for all rent, bills, groceries, dinner dates, vacations & bailed her out of debt a few times, and then some. I've never done so much for a woman in my life. So of course, it goes without saying that she left me! Her comment on this was "You would've had to pay for all that stuff anyways so it's not like you've done anything for me"
Wow... her comment, what an ungrateful, coldhearted thing to say after everything. I'm glad you got rid of her, even with all that you lost, you could've lost more later. It's just not worth it. I'm grateful every day that for all my failed relationships, I owe nothing to those women anymore. Never married, had kids, or committed fully to them, economically or otherwise, because it didn't feel right. And for that I'm luckier than many, I'm free. Sometimes I still naively hope I'd find that one person some day, "a soulmate", to whom I could commit fully, knowing we'd be there for each other, always. But before that miracle somehow manifests, I won't be making the same mistakes I've done before. I'd rather keep my self-respect and sovereignty than trade that for any woman. It means more to me than any money.
@j you're absolutely right, big mistake, never got paid back of course. considered her as family at the time, lived together for 5 years, she outined a plan to pay it back, and the collectors were coming after her, so i wanted to bail her out of a really bad situation. never again...
That sucks. My ex BF was the same, but his excuse was ‘you have so much money, why are you so stingy?’. His response when I asked how he liked the elaborate food I made & asked for feedback was ‘stop bothering me I’m trying to eat’. Not only did I completely support him but he stole from me repeatedly. But it was my own fault for putting up with it all.
3:35 -- 1. Admit your Hypergamy 4:28 -- 2. Don't Lead Men On 5:02 -- 3. Understand Monogamy Is Hard For Men 6:04 -- 4. Stop Giving Men Dating Advice 7:02 -- 5. Take Responsibility For The Men You Date 8:34 -- 6. Check Your Privilege 9:50 -- 7. Become Comfortable With Male Emotions 11:02 -- 8. Stop Shaming Male Sexuality 12:26 -- 9. Be Kind When Rejecting Men 13:46 -- 10. Value The Male Contribution
For number 9, I would add being “... yet firm”. Too often I’ve seen women be wishy washy with their answer. She most likely doesn’t want to date the guy but he doesn’t know that because she framed the rejection so poorly. I would much rather be told “you’re a great guy, but I’m not interested” than “you’re a great guy, but I can’t date right now”. Women need to make it clear they’re not interested and avoid falsely give the guy hope.
I think the average woman has a higher chance of getting a sexual relationship, though not necessarily a romantic one. Above average men seem to have a low chance of getting either. Women can simply rely on being, men have to rely on having, or so it seems.
Maybe there is need to be a balance of both those chances ... if a female open up to sexual chances for a male, the male part has to open up to the romantic chances (like a win-win agreement) in the utilitarian lenses, at the spiritual lenses there could be a wiser version of that agreement.
6. Oh I know how men struggle. See, I’m a bisexual woman. Do I know how to attract other women? Nope! Men are all over the place. When I see a pretty woman I panic and freeze up, or go hide. I have unsuccessfully simped for women. I am a failure with women. I know how you feel. I also have a painfully high sex drive. If I was only interested in women I think I’d have gone mad by now.
Your 10 points that a woman should understand is so accurate. When my wife and I began a family it was our joint decision she would raise the children and take charge of the household leaving me to just work and provide income, it worked for us. After the children were at an age to look after themselves, my wife went back to work part-time. We struggled at first but financially we flourished and our children were brought up in a loving household. We mustn't be doing much wrong as we have now been married 38 years. She is now the primary source of income and I draw a pension as I continue my fight with blood cancer and the horrible side effects from the disease and harsh treatment.
@George Bush ,the few that hit bottom ,maybe become dimly aware.Feminism and the media culture has groomed them top indeed operate as autonomous agents,and most eventually end up very unhappy.Yes,feminism should have never beenand needs to end
It is possible, it's a nature VS nurture. I've personally met a few women that do and recognise society treats women with kid gloves. To be fair they came from families with strong father influence and the parents were still together.
If a parent punished his or her daughter with the same vigor as his or her son, do you think women would _generally_ be as duplicitous and conniving as they are today, or would they be of exemplary character? Be honest.
@Reconsider your position that was the most retarded comparison ive ever heard, and think about it from her position, she hears things that directly contradict one another then doesnt know what to believe cuz again they contradict ome another. You'd be in the same position too bro
Great Video clip! Apologies for the intrusion, I would appreciate your opinion. Have you tried - Franaar Dreaming Love Formula (google it)? It is a good one of a kind product for learning how to make amazing love without the hard work. Ive heard some interesting things about it and my friend Sam after a lifetime of fighting got astronomical success with it.
Where I live women would rather commit suicide instead having their secret stories of sexual escapades with chad becoming public. So many cases like that in news. Why do it in the first place then?
It boils my blood to hear what you say because it resonates so strongly with me. Women giving dating advice, the whole cultural gaslighting, shaming of male sexuality while females think their sexuality is the moral way. But I don't think 9 is a problem, at least in my country maybe the girls are too scared to be cruel. 12:42 I have never heard of this, I have been rejected a lot and I find girls are always trying their best not to hurt me. Girls do a lot of things wrong but this one I don't find to be a issue.
1. Women will not do this - even if they say they will - they won't. 2. This is naive - you're essentially trying to reason with a woman's emotions - a fools strategy. Women are trying to get theirs - half your points are telling them to not get theirs on the chance that the guy will provide for them (a risk women aren't wired to take unless they have literally no other option or unless the man genuinely inspires that risk). Women aren't designed to be accountable - they're solipsistic - it goes against their nature to even listen to your proposals, no matter how correct they might be. It's like telling a lion not to eat you, because if it doesn't, you can bring it steak everyday. It's hungry now. You'll just get bit.
"Women will not do this - even if they say they will - they won't." If you respect women that little and basically do not consider them reasonable, rational individuals why are you even here? You do consider women beneath you, not even human. The way you phrased your comment tells me you think you know the ultimate, final truth. That you have nothing to learn, because you figured it out, you know best. In that case, why are you even here? With such a closed mindset you will probably never find a woman to spend your life with anyway, just get a cabin in the woods, keep to yourself, live a happy life without the women you despise so much and don't bother us.
@@Disappointed_Philosoraptor you strawmanned me really hard with no knowledge of who I am or How I think. I'll give you another chance to try this comment again. Particularly the whole 'I'll never find a woman to spend my life with' hoooblaa (guessing my intentions) and 'you think you know everything, so why are you here' (though I'm clearly here to listen to others because...duh......) but go off king.
@@Disappointed_Philosoraptor wtf where the hell did he said that women are beneath him?! He stated things someone should not expect from a women in a relationship and did not called women trash or something???? Pls read before you type. I am almost sure that the majority of subscribers from this channel don't have a genuine hate towards women bc Alex often says that he likes women and would never blindly hate anyone what so ever.
You are missing one thing. Jesus Christ. The Bible has great advice on how men and woman should and relationships. Key is God centered life not self centered.
So i was in a relationship with a woman that chased me, but when we sat down to dinner a few times she talked about the guy she was helping. Not being a dater it took me 4 dinners to realize she was only dating me because she was afraid of her feelings for the other guy. 8 years after i broke it off she is celebrating her 5 year marriage anniversary to the other guy. In fact within a year she confessed her absolute disaster of her formative years. Not sure i would have had the stomach for her family the way she and her husband have slogged through. 2 lessons: Women really do like male fixer upper projects. Don’t give a woman a second date if she mentions another guy she is helping.
U have got to be kidding me Alex, 2 point and i am already laughing my ass off. Mission impossible. Who would artificially inflate their egos ? Cmon mate...If 1 of 100 attractive females agree on 5 points out of 10, that would be a miracle. A miracle that will never happen, so do not bother. Find your purpose and follow it. Let them be as it is.
That one also confused me. I tried to think of even one. Anything and everything that I have a right to do, and it's legal, and I can afford to do it or buy it, every adult female can also do it or buy it or whatever. Plus she doesn't have to register for the military draft, and I was forced to. Plus she has a right to abort our child even if I don't want her to. I am really beginning to wonder what the word "privilege" actually means.
@@Pezerinno Walking down the street at night safely is just an illusion for men. The thug with a gun doesn't care how buff you are. Statistically men are attacked far more often than women. Men are mugged/jumped, but aren't sexually assaulted. Not having to fear a sexual assault (outside of prison) is the only privilege I could think of.
@@jbalgo lol...lies...Women can always go after the Men they desire, they just don't do it the same way Men do it...Infact Women are more likely to get the Men they desire than are Men to get the Woman they Desire
Also, while you address male attraction to young fertile women as biological and ask women to understand that sacrifice upon marriage, I think women generally do not understand that a marriage also requires her to sacrifice her hypergamy and instincts in the same regard as biological male attraction in order to have a successful long term marriage. Instead, there is one eye into "trading up" and the relationship is never truly settled, especially when getting out is so easy and profitable.
They are not really sacrificing anything they can satisfy their hypergamy even after getting married they can monkey branch to a better guy and don’t forget that they even get rewarded for it with alimony it’s us men who are really sacrificing everything.
List 1. Admit your hypergamy 2. Don't lead man on 3. Understand monogamy is hard for men 4. Stop giving men dating advise 5. Take responsibility for the men you date 6. Check your privilege 7. Become comfortable with male emotions 8. Stop shaming male sexuality 9. Be kind when rejecting men 10. Value the male contribution
When i was young and stupid i shared with my mom some of my secrets, next time i saw all my family knew it. I shared also with one female which girl im attracted to in highschool. Next day this girl comes to me and starts a conversation. Never share anything personal that you don't want others to know with women.
That's true. But I depends on what the girl thinks about you. At least this is how it was in my case. There was a guy who was annoying me for over a year (over the internet!) with his love, even though I told him no in the beginning. He's got a lot of traumas and issues and that's why I had some empathy and tolerated his behaviour. Why did I not just block him? Because I didn't think it would have been good for him either. I don't hate him and I believe he's a good person despite his issues and I wanted to help him, which wad my big mistake. I have never been interested in him. Apart from that, I had a boyfriend who he was aware of as well. We had a complicated relationship, not in a way of misunderstanding or anything, we've always got along, and that's why he kept hoping he'd somehow steal me away from him. When he got me really annoyed I could indeed leak his secrets to other people. But usually it was more about asking their opinion about stuff, and not mocking him or anything like that. Now talking about a guy who I believe I have a very deep connection with. I love seeing him vulnerable. And I have never used it against him and I never will. I love it because then I know that he trusts me so much that he can share something like that with me. I would never want to hurt that connection. I have no idea how other women can do something like that. The only thing that comes to my mind is that they simply do not love you.
I just wish female follow this cos talking to a girl is so frustrating now a days just to even talk as a friend because when you are kind girls are not.
@@seeborisgo8074 bro the biggest thing that I learnt from Alexander grance videos is that not to waste time on stupid people I would rather not be focused on girls anymore and helps guys out cos they would be more genuine.
@@nicholaslucas5183 bro but why do we have to even deal with these girls when it will waste a lot of energy and time to try to woo her se u might have got this only I was going to be lynched by the guys. Wasting time on these sort of girls is not worth it. We guys need to raise our standards cos girls will never compromise on their standard then why should we.
All of the 10 points require the wahmen to have empathy for and understanding of men that she doesn't know/like/attracted to. That is a very uncommon wahmen nowadays. Good luck with wahmen doing more than 2 of these points.
@@MiwaTamu Good on you Miwa but in your case already having a husband you kinda seem to have done a good job already . These tips are essential for women who are single because they are the ones known to treat men horribly in the dating market
monogamy is awesome. did it for 3 years (before she left) and made me realize i can only get intimate and a rise when its someone i truly love
4 года назад
Funny, men are CONSTANTLY asking how to be more appealing to the other gender, yet women have almost ZERO ability to look at themselves and see what they are doing wrong.
I think it's because feminism told females that "you are perfect as you are" "If men ask you to change something he is bad " Or something similar I don't remember the exact words
As good as this all seems, it's hard to believe that in this current society women will all of a sudden make a major turnaround and do most, if any, of these things.
They won't . social media is a women's porn addiction. The effects of that addiction ( disloyalty, narcissism, materialistc) is what they are now. In 20 years they will change cuz the evidences will be to great to ignore unlike now there is still disbelief among them and that men are trash talk. Mind you yt censors the opposite gender of the last statement. Let start with the information they are not seeing.
Balancing career and children is objectively harder for women, for biological reasons. As a man, apart from the sex, you can immediately focus in other things again, while the pregnant women will go through hormone and body changes, effects after birth and so on. I'm not saying it has no effect on the father, he'll usually have changes in mindset and so on, but hard bodily changes are absent. So, becoming a parent is easier for men than for women. Apart from that, I think in our society there's nothing else. There's some large differences in _large scale_ distributions on various issues, but that's irrelevant on the individual level.
There's the pressure of figuring out as early as possible the best mate and a person to settle down with, the pressure which many men like us do not have to face at similar stages of our lives. We as men have a lot of time in our hands to wait, think and make the decisions with no adverse effect to our sexual market value. The reality is that women do not have that freedom as we do
Men are usually delt a better hand with respect to the current society, but that's due to holding women to male standards. More women than men have a personality that holds them back. It's clearly individual challenges that those individuals (men and women alike) have to overcome while others don't, but it affects more women than men. I see how you can see it as a male privilege, but I disagree because privilege is something granted by an authority. It's more a _large scale_ natural male advantage. Some may be nurture, not nature, but in the end, for the present situation, it's root cause is rather irrelevant.
Career vs family. If you want to have a family a career is just way harder for a woman. Because as a woman you're the one carrying that foetus, having to give birth and recover from that (this can take months, mind you!). Imagine having to do that 2 or 3 times, the woman will have lost so much time and energy (and so, potential) just being pregnant and recovering from pregnancy that a man would not have lost. Now, if a woman really should want to have a serious career like that is a different question. But it's undeniable that the career/family issue is just harder for women, not because of "the patriarchy" or whatever, but because of the womb inside of them.
Being a video dedicated to women I found the characteristics you mentioned so enlighting for men to understand better what they should be looking for in a long term partner/high quality women. Even if someone is already in a relationship they could lead their partner to keep improving in her relation with others so that contributes to general better dynamics. Again awesome video! Thanks Alexander Grace
Yall ever notice most female friends never hook up their male friend with other attractive women..like they will say how awesome he is an that he would make a woman happy yet she won't help her "friend".
@@independentthought3390 Their most used dating advice is: "just be yourself". Easy for them to say when they literally don't have to do anything to get men.
Either you're the youngest 50 year old guy I've ever seen, or you are wise way beyond your years. You're offering excellent advice! Something it took me being 50 years old to finally figure out.
I strongly believe the way to approach this and to tell a woman to not do something wrong is to tell them to actually do it and make it sound super evil and wrong. Give evil advice. They will be disgusted since their public image that is the top priority for them will be at extreme risk, specially if you tell them while people are around listening, and they will think more than twice about it.
The point about accepting male emotions is really interesting. I have felt a kind of repulsion to my boyfriend crying (even though it happens super rarely) it's just not sexy. I had to conciously connect with my compassion in a way that i dont have to with my female friends. Another caveat to the emotions thing is I've had to learn to understand and accept his anger as well! He never directs his more intense anger towards me but when he gets mad during a video game or something that happened at work he can be really intense. I've learned to accept it calmly and not try to tell him to not feel that way or get scared by it. He never stays mad for long and i think its impoved by the fact that im supportive rather than shaming
I am very grateful, that you also helping women to understand men more with care for both sides. This is rare, I think. But as a woman I wonder why a man needs a woman except for sexual relations (which is understandable)? What is her value for a man's life? Do men really want to have children, be in monogamous relationships and be the head of the family? Or in most cases they do it because "this is how it should be and everyone does it, that's why I have to." I am sincerely interested, because it seems to me that men live well without monogamous relationships and family obligations. Thank you!
Just in my experience, by their 30s many men want to have a family, it seems to be instinctive. But broadly there are some men who want to stay around for their children and to be monogamous, and another group who find this harder. Sometimes it is suggested that this corresponds with the K (pair bonding, investment in children) and R (interest in sex with many partners but low investment) type difference in evolutionary biology and is a sign of different evolutionary life strategies among men.
I find deep happiness from strong connections and it's not just me. Quality of relationships is one of the best predictors of happiness, health, and so on, both for men and women. I used to be a boy you'd not want your daughter around. I did a lot of mistakes and acted like a total douche which I regret. One of my actions has cost me losing a girl I still love. We've been together for 5 years and it's been 3 years since we broke up. After that, I know precisely that I want to create a family and become a father. I'm no longer dating women just for casual reasons and it feels good, even if things don't work out. I'd usually go for a date with a girl I find cute to see what's up, but I need to feel like I will like her as a person once physical attraction wears out. Hope that helps!
I can tell you about me, though thats in no way representative. There a both types and a few in between. Ive known that I only wanted to have one partner and a big family with at least 8 children and a big house since I was like 8 or 9. The desire has grown by the day and now Im living the dream. There is men like me out there, but they are rare. For a lot of men its the second but I advise you to only go for the first. Dont wait. If you want to be a mother eventually, your job is to find a husband asap. Build a relationship that is strong and start young but not too young. I had my first date at 22. Thats a little late, but i wouldnt advise anyone start dating until the age of at least 19. Let your brain develop. Develop a personality. Be someone interesting and know what you want from life before you start dating. What is my gfs value to me? there is a lot she brings to the relationship. Companionship Humour (believe it or not haha) She will be the mother of my children She will take care of the household while Im not there She takes care of the finances because she has worked in a bank before She is there to talk about everything She cooks really well and loves to cook for me She is an inspiration and encourages and demands (in a positive way ofc) that Im the best version of myself and expects me to hold her to the same standard
I'd add one more: Give men room. They don't need to talk as much as you do, and genuinely appreciate the quiet it takes to cool off from their tensions and worries, or just enjoy restfully. Pro tip: Say it once instead of three times. Saying something in a slightly different way is not getting deeper or more honestly into a subject, or breaching a new one. It's just holding your partner hostage, or nagging. It is not nearly so important that you talk, but that you say something. Pro tip #2: Take the super-chatty/emotional punching bag part to your girlfriends. That's what they're for. Work it out or at least deflate your internal pressure with them. There's a good chance they'll love the very same stuff that wears men out. And they'll probably tell you you're deeply sympathetic instead of your partner feeling like you're stealing his life away and keeping it for yourself. Again in the same theme of giving men room, don't assume you own your partner's time. We do want to have some space for our own lives even when sharing them with others, and wanting that is not being emotionally distant. It is psychologically crippling to men to be dominated, even if only by the implied demand that they never stop listening or never leave your side or focus on anything but you.
The more i studied the subject the more i realised they only do this if you are too available and accomodating to their "needs". You have to be cold and distant and give her the silent treatment from time to time. Go to your "cave" or go out and be absent for unpredictable periods of time (this should trigger her anxiety of for her absent hunter protector)' That should kick start her instincts to accomodate your needs rather than hers. One thing i have learned is women are far more wired to be instinctual creatures then men and know how to conceal their true intent through deception.
This is a great video. I've been following for quite a while and finally subscribed today. I don't always agree with your particular morals but at least it is clear from where you are coming from. What saddens me is I feel there is very little chance of the modern woman even beginning to appreciate any of this. Do you remember the video you did asking women if there was anything men could do better than women? You could literally see the programming take over, they couldn't find one single thing. Finally, I hope the woman who spoke to you takes her time to evaluate her life, her feelings and what she really wants. Because she sounds sincere and that could be taken advantage of.
Women ALWAYS seem to ignore the nice guy, and go for the exciting, bad-boy. Then, when he's out screwing other women, you're SHOCKED, and wonder, 'Where are all the good men?" Women never seem to understand this. Bad boys are referred to as bad boys for a REASON. Meanwhile, the average, nice guys you've ignored, would'nt screw around on you because HE PROBABLY CAN'T. He doesn't have lots of women at his disposal, because women IGNORE him. WHY CAN'T WOMEN UNDERSTAND THIS?
I truly appreciate the young lady who consulted with you and as a result inspired the creation of this video. And I thank YOU bro bro for putting into words how most of us feel. I couldn't have said this better myself. #RealestVideoEver
@@eatanotherzio6811 You do not know me and your narrative about me is false. I have a ''dude'' that I take care of every day. He has paralyzed 95% of his body after a horrible motorcycle accident. We have known each other for a very long time and have dated for about 5 years. I know every little detail about him. We broke up because he does not want me to be constantly concerned about him (and boy, was he wrong). And that is only one ''dude'' that I know in and out. I did not hit another person up, I prefer friends and will let nature do its thing. If I fall in love with a person, then I have feelings for that person. Just like it happened to the man of my dreams, even though he can only move his head a little bit. Why are you judging us? Why do so many men generalize all women because of the bad experience they encountered? Just grow up and move past it. It sounds as easy as it is; but you need to stop being blind-sighted by nonsense in your life, so you can be real with yourself and deal with situations easier. But these obsessive narratives need to stop. It sounds like you are trying to act like you know a person with that ''you all say the same bullshit'', like do I know you? Do you know me? Do you know my neighbors' daughter? Do you know my niece? It is really weird, and I hope you either find your path or never find it because the in-between is what you are expressing at the moment, and one day, you are going to either hurt a girl or woman physically or mentally because you cannot tell me that this behavior you are showing, does not derive from your real life. Also, friends exist, get over it. I have as many male friends as I have female friends. Maybe you should change your narratives into something more positive so that you do not sound like a total sexist manchild who is stuck in the past. Sorry, not sorry. Deal with situations and grow up, or stay in the past and feel forever guilty of something you had no control over.
@@hemisheyes9865 I've talked to over a hundred women this past year and more years prior and generally they think and act the same. Ironic a woman telling me to grow up lmao. Just look at the countless reports/experiences in this comment section including mine. The minute a man opens up the woman is gone or well on the path to do so since its easier to be with a "fun" guy than a man who shows he can be vulnerable. Please stop bullshitting.
Thank You for this video, I was confused too how to act with men (different voices from different places - gave me vertigo!). All the best from Poland :)
People dont have a gender, they have a sex. Gender is used in linguistics, in gendered languages. Please dont contribute to the degredation of the english language.
Perfect list of 10. Theres nothing i can think to add. But these 10 definately cover all there really is to have a healthier relationship. Wish my girl would watch this.
I remember as a teenager walking across a dance floor to ask a girl for a dance, she saying no and walking back to my friends which was a long way back. Always hated that 'power and control' shite women can have over you if you allow it. It shapes your views if you let it .BTW I am a reasonably good looking guy with a decent attitude towards women.
Boys take it from me, I’ve been with my mrs for 7 years and we have a 2 year old daughter. Never ever ever open up to your girl and tell her about your problems. Your woman wants you to be the rock of the relationship. Opening open only scares her and makes her panic.
Well yeah she might react "positively" in the moment but she's not going to respect you after if you unload all your problems on her pretty little ears.
Most of this I actually agree with As for the idea that men naturally like taking responsibility and like the breadwinner role Etc, no We've just been taught to believe that that's how you keep a woman And once you question that, things start to come unraveled And that's when you start to realize that in many cases, having a wife is more like having an extra daughter, then I having a partner
Sorry but... I think most average, rational men have completely lost faith in having a desirable, faithful relationship with a semi attractive woman. 🤷🏻♂️ The data just doesn’t support this pipe dream.
That's because he doesn't value women as real people and instead views them as products of their Biology and as if they are a different species entirely, a majestic beast that we as men try to understand and deal with.
Women in South Korea are incredibly upfront about their hypergamy. They own it and Korean men know what's at stake for them. That level of transparency is incredibly refreshing. Both genders know where they stand and what's expected of them.
I think you should retitle the video to reflect the universal advise you're giving to women. It reads like a title for men. Best advise I've heard EVER to help women understand men. I'm VERY serious. This is a video every high school in the world should promote. You're work is amazing Alexander. You do have a wonderful gift for understanding people. Thank you.
I'm happily married to a man I love. This video was compassionate yet honest. It reminded me to express my love and gratitude for my husband. We have different challenges with young children at home and we both make sacrifices for the good of our family. Sometimes its good to be reminded of the difficulties of your partner when you are so wrapped up in your own. Good video, keep it up!
To be honest, is it even worth the effort to try to be in relationships? Dating has been ruined beyond all repair as far as I'm concerned, women in this day and age tend to lean towards predatory behaviour.
I've watched ypur videos & dayumn I have so much difficulties to relate to the female experience that you describe. I just don't get women. 😂 I guess I am quite masculine woman... which is why I became a crazy cat lady. 😅 What I mean: crying, especially in front of someone else, is very difficult for me. Thus I've always appreciated it if a man trust me so much that he will express such vulnerability in my presence. I want to hug him, try to relate to his experience & show him that I am there for him. I guess the difficulty runs to contrary direction for me - it is difficult for me to trust that a man would be capable of handling my emotions. It really frustrated me when my emotionally unintelligent ex would understand the extent of my emotional distress only after I bursted into tears! (It triggered him into that panicking nurturing instinct that men tend to go into when women cry. 😅) To me it felt annoying that he lacked the emotional subtlety to respond to my emotions before things went into full drama. For me, emotional sophistication is among the most important qualities in a man.
Stop shaming men's sexuality -- absolutely right, and virtually absent from public discourse. Maybe it was 20 years ago or so that a book called "The Peter Pan Syndrome" came out. It said that men who did not want to commit were, of course, wrong. But worse than wrong. Immature. Psychologically, emotionally obtuse and under-developed. Perpetual children who did not know themselves or their position in life. A good while later a book came out that was a sort of corrective, "Maybe He's Just Not That Into You." At that point it was a shocker for a lot of women to think that men simply might not think that it's not just a matter of commitment, but of commitment to YOU that he was not interested in. Because hey, maybe he's entirely wrong, but ... maybe you're just not that great? Or at least not for him. Maybe he actually understands the depth and importance of commitment as well as or even better than you, and it is BECAUSE he takes it seriously that he doesn't want to commit, not in spite of it? For too long the men's point of view has been anathema to even discuss seriously, much less validate. Instead, it's all about making what women want the norm and the only healthy alternative. Men who don't commit are boys, men who would rather sleep around are dogs, infantile, or psychologically maladjusted. Women will never understand men -- or in turn truly care about them -- if they refuse to see male needs and desires and biology as acceptable and ordinary, and sensible ... and instead see male psychology as only acceptable or even existent when seen through the lens of being a woman and nonsensical when not focused on fulfilling the desires of women.
The day I got screamed at for holding the door open at the mall for the girl behind me.... that's the last time I ever want anything to do with women. I'm done. That was near 12 years ago. "Dont you think I can open a door? Dont you think I'm cap-a-ble of doing for myself?!" And that was just being courteous... some of the responses when approached in a social setting, or out at the bar, were much worse.
Holy... yes...specially the door opening can nowadays missunderstood. Sometimes you only want to be polite and friendly, regardless of who you would open the door for. I had it too, open the door at some shop and getting a roll-eye face from a woman which I even did not thought of to try to date or so. Weird times...
Don’t let one behatch affect your behavior so profoundly. There are crazy ladies - you do you. If you feel masculine and generous holding a door, do it. Ignore the few who complain.
This made me realise how different I am from most men and how different the women are in my life than to those described. Choose wisely guys, things can be good
Good list...but I would add one more important one. Women often assume men are mind readers (some even think unless a man guesses what they are thinking they do not care or love them). They expect men to figure out what they are thinking and magically respond to the unsaid desire. Women (and men) need to SAY OUT LOUD what they are thinking, feeling, and wanting. Sans that, nothing but trouble develops.
Please make more videos like this!! I’d love to hear the answers to questions like should girls wear makeup, is it wrong/lazy to want to be a housewife and take care of kids, etc.
Men are different, so naturally what they like is different. Personally I'd love for my partner to be comfortable in her own skin, but also put in some effort (such as shaving and caring for herself), but she doesn't have to always wear make up. Basically some good balance, comfort with feminine traits. As for being a housewife, I find it noble and admirable (if that's what a woman wants to do), as it requires lots of effort and strength.
I don't mind approaching women but at least give some obvious hints that you want me to talk to you. Smile, keep eye contact, just anything. I can't read your mind. Looking away equals no interest, so I will walk away as if I didn't notice you.
Number Seven. I hate to break the heart truth to everybody, but NEVER open to a woman. Do not do it. This is what you got your boys for. Keep good male friends and use them for this.
10:09 I don't agree here. We see that especially successful formats like Game of Thrones are very emotional for men. Also Rick and Morty, Bojack Horseman or Black Mirror are especially exciting for men. Forrest Gump, Green Book, Interstellar - to name just a few films. We like to choose emotionality! It's true that men are reluctant to admit that they have deeper feelings, but especially when we are alone, we also like to watch movies and series that are emotionally stirring.
You're glossing over the degree of emotion. And especially the ability to gather themselves together again. Women want the stability of a rock to ground them not some white knight that will go around saying "oh what are your negative feelings in this moment 'cause I'm going to slay them and you'll love me for it!".
