Fantastic Beasts: The Secrets of Dumbledore - Angry Review 

My wife apologized for taking me to see this.

"They could have done it without him" is absolutely the mantra of this entire trilogy. Newt is basically a non-entity who is there for some reason.

Alex is such an awesome asset for AngryJoeShow. He doesn't mindlessly mumble and ramble in the background and gives his raw opinion that isn't influence by others around him. He knows what we want to say and delivers it without BS.

The general consensus is that Fantastic Beasts should have been about Newt, doing his own magical beast related adventures (imagine Indiana Jones, but instead of hunting down artifacts you are looking for rare creatures), and the Dumbledore Vs Grindlewald story should have been it's own separate trilogy unrelated to Newt. Because mixing the 2 ideas was always a weird choice that has clearly made both of the stories less interesting. Instead of creating a singular series, they should have made an Wizarding Cinematic Universe.

Ive noticed it was never about Newt from the first movie. They should have named this series something else entirely. I was really excited at first thinking it was going to be alllllll about the magic animals in the world but it quickly turned into the backstory of Dumbledore and the wizarding worlds politics like you guys mentioned.

This is like a Pokemon movie where the main character barely ever uses his Pokemons.

Probably addressed but couple things: You do not have to kill someone to get control of the elder wand. Examples: Malfoy got control by disarming Dumbledore and then Harry got control by disarming Malfoy (Even though Malfoy never even held the wand) You can get control even if the wand is nowhere in proximity or being used. Second, Dumbledore does not kill Grindewald. Grindewald is in the original Harry Potter movies as an old man in prison. Voldemort goes to visit him to ask about the wand. That's how he learns that Dumbledore owns it.

It’s incredible how they keep giving David Yates more Harry Potter movies and he consistently flops, over and over , and over again. Does he know something about the producers?

After how Warner treated JD, I'd say its failure is more than well deserved.

I actually liked the first Fantastic Beasts. I even told my friend it felt like a magical Jurassic Park for me. It's a shame they dropped that concept immediately after the 2nd movie. It feels like they just add the occasional fantastic beast here and there just to say "See! It's still Fantastic Beasts!" Just a damned shame.

"It's not for children and it's not for people with BRAINS!" - Alex, quote of the year

"Average Beasts and Dont Go Looking for Them" XD Damn alex summed it up real nice

They should have done a Fantastic Beasts trilogy and a Dumbledore vs Grindelwald trilogy. And alternate between them

The movies could have been like the anime Mushishi. It should have been a trilogy focusing on Newt, his gang, their adventures with fantastical beasts. That could have been so much fun. In a similar tone to Dead Man's Chest. Great action scenes, characters you can get attached to. If they really needed to shoehorn in legacy characters, they could have come up as cameos or supporting characters. Like Dumbledore making an appearance and helping Newt on a quest etc.

I would love it if we actually saw other magic schools. The fact we saw the American magical community without seeing Ilvormorny is a waste. Beaubaxton was another school we didn’t get to see despite the fact that the second film took place in France. IMO, Rowling needs to emphasize the Wizarding World and stop using Hogwarts as a crutch to pull on our nostalgia strings, we’ve seen Hogwarts, show us more new things.

I like how Alex always sits quietly at the beginning of the reviews, waiting for his turn to say something and then just explodes with his impressions

They never figured out that all we really wanted to see was Newt taking care of his fantastic beasts (and occasionally finding one).

They dropped the ball from the beginning of this phase. We should have had the Wizarding Americas. Voodoo, zombies, gris-gris, voodoo dolls, etc. Sasquatch, Wendigo, Paul Bunyon and Babe, Mothman, Skunk Ape, JACKALOPES, etc. Medicine men, ghost dance, thunderbird vs feathered serpent, skinwalkers, spirit journeys, etc. All those options and more, right there waiting.

I actually like Newt as a character but this whole series suffers from 'The Hobbit' syndrome. Bilbo and Newt were great and fun when it focused on them, but they became less and less important in the movie series that is named after them.

They should have left the 1st Fantastic Beasts as a stand-alone film or just make sequels focused solely on Newt and his adventures with Jacob, while doing a separate trilogy that goes into the origins of Dumbledore and Grindelwald's first meeting to their final battle in 1945. Rowling isn't a good scriptwriter. She's a good author but when it comes to doing scriptwriting, she doesn't understand that things need to be done differently.

Can we make Alex facepalming the new epic fail seal of approval?

If “muggles” comes from the British term “mug”, and it does, you gotta wonder after watching the wizards in this film who the real muggles are.

This trilogy actually confuses me, who is the main character. Is it really Newt?

The final duel with Dumbledore and Grendiwald was anti climatic af. They could have done so much more with that. It also reminded me of a Kingdom Heats fight sequence, only lamer.

It’s time to let the Harry Potter franchise Rest In Peace.

While I liked it (marginally) more than the last one, all this movie really did was make me realize that I love the first one. Imagine a more lighthearted series of movies that focus solely on Newt traveling the world and encountering weird creatures. (Maybe to finish his book?) Sigh... I'm just gonna pretend the first movie never got a sequel.

Alex is really good at explaining and point out important things👏

Alex strikes me as that one guy that could've been great in the narrative department of any game, movie or TV show... just that they don't want him cuz he'll hurt the team's feelings.

Alex's facepalm is all I needed to see. This gonna be good.

I always know a good review is coming up when Alex is facepalming in the thumbnail.

The first one was ok, but it should have been a one movie deal tbh. They keep naming it fantastic beasts, and get us invested in Newt but totally put him on the backburner here. A movie series Id like to see is the creation of Hogwarts. Seeing the stories of the original headmasters. Also, funny side note: she requested an order for half a dozen copies of the case, comes back with 4.

I started having my doubts when the trailers were less about the move and more about capturing the nostalgia of the harry potter series created.

Dumbledore never kills Grindelwald. Voldy kills him in book 7. You don’t have to kill the owner of the elder wand. You just have to beat them in combat/duel. Come on guys

I dont even go to the movies anymore, I just watch their reviews with some popcorn knowing that I will 100% be entertained every single time.

Dumbledore's brother isn't a "new charachter". He was in the books and the movies. He runs the tavern relatively close to the school of Hogwarts that student's often buy butterbeer from. Students like Harry, Ron, and Hermione.

"It's not for thinking grown adults, it's not for Harry Potter fans, and it's certainly not for children... who the fuck is this for?" This really got me! 🤣

I'm convinced that the fantastic beast trilogy is a comedy.

I didn't even know this movie existed until the reviews started coming out

For the Elder Wand, it's who ever Kills or Disarms the other wizard can use the full power of the elder wand

The good thing about this movie was I got so bored that I looked for a new data deal whilst the movie was playing and saved myself £17 a month, thanks fantastic beast.

You know it’s good when Alex is facepalming in the thumbnail.

I think the biggest problem with Fantastic Beasts is that there's no reason for this series to exist. I was alright with the first movie, the second was a snoozefest, the third I haven't watched yet and don't plan on doing. But either way, none of the movies gave a reason for this series to exist.

Joe consistently saying "Grumball" instead of Grindelwald is hilarious, but them saying how they remember all the Harry Potter movies while forgetting Aberforth, Hermione's parentage (both her parents are muggles, thats why Malfoy calls her "Mudblood") and how the Elder wand works is doubly hilarious.

5:06 If the Big Harry Potter fan of the group is falling asleep in the beginning, that's not a good sign for the movie.

The second this movie ended I googled how many Fantastic Beasts movies there will be in the theater… when I saw “5 movies” I said fuck this to my friend 😂

The 'Secret of Dumbledore' was that he secretly liked a big meaty-sausage. XD

i just got home from seeing this movie. Here are my thoughts: For the first half of the movie I was so worried about trying to touch or hold my date's hand that i have no clue what happened. For the second half of the movie it was warm in the theater and the chair was cozy and I had to stop myself from falling asleep. I have no clue what actually happened. But it was a nice date

What I find fascinating is how and why people continue to pay money to see movies that are quite obviously terrible? 😐🤨🤦🏾‍♂️🤷🏾‍♂️

To be honest the only way these movies could have worked is if they were sort of an stand alone anthology series, first movie on fantastic beast, second one for the origin of Grindelwald and third one about Dumbledore young days. But WB and JK probably were too greedy and want a big brand like the old HP films. The fantastic beast original cast literally have nothing to do in this film and the whole nagini thing that build some hype from the previous one is literally forgotten.

I'm going to be honest... I didn't know another Fantastic Beasts was even coming out.

You guys should know that grindelwald isn’t killed by dumbledore, just defeated. He appears in deathly hallows and is killed by Voldemort in the books

How is nobody mentioning that a film called Secrets of Dumbledore actually has NO secrets?? So many things I would love to know about Dumbledore and I learned NOTHING new. 😓

For ONCE, Percy Jackson is finally getting more attention and devotion than Harry Potter after being written off as a knockoff for years now. It's oddly satisfying.

Took my 7 year old nephew to the movie and immediately got uncomfortable when they killed the Chila and dozed off quite a bit with the Dumbledore scenes 😂

My biggest problem with Harry Potter has always been that people only ever seem to learn spells that already exist. Nobody is making new magic. The wizards don't embrace/incorporate much modern technology either. Seems strange

I feel like I need to watch your show the day and time you put it out.. before someone bans you again. It's like rushing to the store for a sale before it's out of stock. Love your show.

Honestly the movie was okay, but some points were weird and confusing. I like Mads Mikkelsen as Grindelwald and they used more magic in this film than the last few movies combined. But the look on Alex’s face on the thumbnail says it all 😂😂😂

Alex is face palming in the thumbnail… This is gonna be good!

I don't think that was supposed to be the 'final, epic battle' between Dumbledore and Grindelwalt. But that might have to be at this point.

You dont become the master of the Elder Wand by killing its master. You get it by disarming its master. Thats why Harry was the master of the Elder Wand. Draco disarmed Dumbledore, and didnt kill him, then Harry disarmed Malfoy.

I read somewhere that Warner Bros are just pumping these movies out to like keep the rights to the ip or something and at this stage It really feels like it, this is coming from a die hard potter fan. It feels like to me the FB movies aren't even in the same universe as the HP movies because of how little im interested in them

I just want Alex's review, it's what we live for.

I work at a theater. I had the job of ushering the theaters for the early screenings for this movie. A lot of the theaters had people who passed out and fell asleep. That told me the movie was boring as hell of a lot of people couldn’t stay awake 😂😂😂

You Three are great, those movies don't interest me but your reviews are so much more entertaining than any movie could be. Keep up the good work. 👍👍

joe the problem is grindelwald is alive in the potter saga, so they cant kill him

The PROBLEM with the entire trilogy is J.K. Rowling herself. She is a Book writer, not a Screen writer. There is a HUGE difference. Screen writers face a lot more obstacles than book writers do. One of those things being time. That's why all 3 movies feel none sensical, boring, complicating and confusing of all. J.K. Rowling needs to stop writing these movies!!

I just realized. this is the Harry Potter equivalent of the new SW trilogy, They had no plan on how to make these trilogies end, SW was ruined by directors forcing their ideas into it and FB was ruined by trying to get HP equivalent numbers.

I wouldn't really call Aberforth a "new" character as he was prominent in the 7th harry potter book.

it’s failing at the box and it feels so sweet. They deserve the failure for firing depp

As soon as I noticed Alex's arms crossed, I knew immediately knew he was gonna rip into this movie in his signature style.

Your timing is fucking spot on, Joes. Got home from the theater, took a shower, this video was waiting for me. I fucking love you guys.

It's sad. My friend went on the 2nd day and it was around noon and no one was in the theater. The lobby was full... but there was him his sister, and 3 other single people in the movie house that seats over 100.

I’m a massive Harry Potter fan but the fantastic beast is boring as fuck I keep falling asleep while watching it

The first of the fantastic beasts was peek for this new series, and Newt is a very interesting character. It’s a shame all the amazing creatures are taking a backseat when it’s in the title 🤣

Alex and Joe's early statement is right on the head. It feels like it's made just for the people looking for *anything* new to be able to get back into the world. I watched the first movie and it felt like a dollar store Doctor Who, so I completely lost interest in the series after that. Which it even failed at doing that, it just doesn't feel like it was made to accomplish anything meaningful. Most of the characters don't even feel like they're really adding to anything, they're just there to tag along. They also decided to remove all the actually interesting parts of the Harry Potter world and replace them with politics that is essentially just a lazy rehash of the original movies. But instead of Grindelwald actually feeling like a threat, he turns out to just be a dollar store Voldemort. He's not even a Dark Lord, which it probably would have been much better if he turned out to be one.

This movie could have bean good if it was written well , like how in the first couple HP movies it was very light hearted but in the later movies it became darker and darker. Though when Alex said he rembered the HP movies but then forgot about DBs bro I laughed out loud 🤣. Though it does seem that you guys did forget somethings from the previous movies. Honestly I think the ministry of magic is weak as hell , if I'm remembering it right , I'm pretty sure that the ministry was taken over by the death eaters , which left the fate of the whole wizarding war to a bunch of hogwarts students and teachers which is kinda dumb.

I am sorry you have to suffer for our amusement Alex, know we appreciate you.

I mean some points were making sense to me, at least I think so. Albus vs. Credense was happening in young one's mind, it was an illusion spell. Kowalski getting Crucio was because he was already accused (but not sure why we was walking all willie nillie) of attempted murder on Grindelwald. Breaking the curse was because both Albus and Aberforth tried protecting Credense, with Aberforth's spell making direct contact with Grindelwald and Albus' just strengthening it. But so many points just weren't adding up. Just like in books - you can explain many things with magic. But the movie felt lazy and inconsistent.

Thank you. I just didn’t understand how he suddenly broke the blood pact with that reasoning. He was attacking, I was protecting….like After all that!

I have watched a lot of other reviews and its funny that almost everyone says that this is better than the previous one which I agree (mostly because of storytelling compered to that one). But honestly when I saw it I also thought it was sooo boring. It would be so interesting if (S P O I L E R S ! ! ! ) Dumbledore and Grindelwald had the same fight paralleled with really simillar fight that happened when they were young. I also would like to find out MORE about ALBUS Dumbledore.

Hopefully CBS doesn't take this down

In my opinion, this movie was merely a "meh". It was not nearly as good as it needed to be to revive the series.

I don't remember, but you don't have to kill the owner of the Elder wand... I believe you only need to ''win''? Harry gets it from Malefoy because he disarmed him I think? I don't remember exactly how it comes from Dumbledore to Harry, but I believe it went Dumbledore to Malefoy... to Harry. Not sure. It's been soooo long. I am pretty sure Grinderwald doesn't die and is sent to prison. Voldemort kills him later I think. On Albus' brother... Maybe you don't remember, but he was always an existing character from the later HP books. I don't remember if he was in the movie, but he was in the books ;) Honestly, they should just stop making movies about this at this point. The writting is terrible.

I’ve been back watching AJS a few months ago after not having time over the last few years. I noticed Alex has been in with reviews and what not. What a great addition. You got AJ being AJ, OJ reminding me of me 😂, and Alex just giving an opinion that opens up the others perspective. When did he come on board with the team?

Alex’s face was me when I saw the trailer

I have just eaten a salad.

Now Joe you got to review Everything Everywhere All at Once, that movie was freaking amazing. Shout out to Ke Huy Quan (kid from temple of doom) stole every scene he was in.

Honestly, the way WB treated Johnny stained this whole series for me, plus I can't sit there and watch a bunch of people pretending to be the beacons of morality and standing to the forces of darkness when nobody of the cast did anything against a horrible injustice happening just as they started filming it, one of them (Jacob's actor) actually posting a bunch of victim blaming tweets, Dave Batista put his career on the line when James Gunn was fired by Disney, that's a man with principles. This hurts because believe it or not, Newt is the protagonist whom I've connected the most in all of cinema, I relate so hard to everything about him and It's a really bold and unique male protagonist to have, in a big franchise nonetheless. But I guess abuse supporters Warner Bros had to come, fire Ray Fisher and JD while keeping Amber Heard and Ezra Miller, and just be complete assholes, all of that really made me avoid this studio like the plague.

The stories may still be there, but The Magic is clearly gone.

Imagine how much more support and money this film would’ve made in box office if JD was in it.

Joe, is there anyway you can post the audio for these movie reviews as a podcasts? I understand the game reviews have a lot of visuals so those wouldn't work well, but I feel like I would get the info from these movie reviews just fine. If you already do, maybe put a link the the description so I know where to get it please. Thanks man, keep up the good work.

An actually, deliberately dark prequel of wizard wars and massive collateral damage of regular humans, leading up to the formation of the Ministries of Magic to keep the peace would be amazing for all the kids that grew up with the Harry Potter books.

I liked the first film in this series. The second one was just 2 hours of exposition dump. It was "hey, remember when we mentioned this name one time in the original series? Here they are! Here's a reference." It felt like Star Wars prequels. Someone mentioned something as a throwaway line, better bring it up because people will memberberry it.

Oh yeah, facepalming Alex in the thumbnail! This one is bound to be a good one lmao.

The secrets of Dumbledore, still kept secret in the Chinese market.

I would have loved a series of stories about Newt traveling the world helping to trap or appease dangerous magical creatures that might end up wandering into muggle populated areas if they aren't careful. Like if a dragon got magical rabies and is seen heading towards a muggle city so Newt has to stop it. Or magical hunters took a nundu's cubs so Newt has to get the cubs back to the mother before it goes on a rampage and destroys an entire town. They would have only needed to make a trilogy instead of a 5 movie series, and they could have finished it with a grand finale with some kind of Godzilla sized creature that's just waking up from hibernation that Newt has to make the hard decision to not save because its too aggressive and he has to end up killing it or something. There are so many things you can do with Magical creatures and I don't feel like they are taking advantage of it. We already have good spy movies, good soldier/army movies, good magic spell movies (the original Harry Potter Movies), so having movies that focus on magical creatures that don't have to worry about the world building too much because the Harry Potter original movies already did that, would be amazing.

Can’t wait for Alex to start his own reviews or side podcasts, love his takes.

Mads, Jude and Redmayne, you'd expect this to be one hell of a movie. :(

Spoilers First, I am going to start out with some positives because I really did enjoy a few things in this film. The opening restaurant scene with Gellert Grindelwald/Albus Dumbledore and the scene in the forest with Newt rescuing the Qilin are both excellent. Mads Mikkelsen is fantastic as Grindelwald. He exudes the perfect duality of charm and menace that genuinely makes me believe he is the type of person Dumbledore might actually have fallen in love with. The resolution with Credence and Aberforth was pretty interesting and one of the more satisfying plot points in the movie. Jacob is an amazing character that brings some much needed comic relief to this series, and Jude Law does a great job playing Dumbledore (even if I initially wanted to see Jared Harris in the role of a younger Dumbledore). On the topic of Jude Law playing Dumbledore, get Jude Law some pajamas and shelve the suit - he's Albus Dumbledore, not Al Capone. Now, for the mixed and rough parts of the film. I was really surprised at the ending with the Qilin because I thought the real Qilin was going to end up bowing to Jacob. It would've been fascinating to contrast Grindelwald's speech about muggles being the enemy with the Qilin identifying a muggle as the person most filled with purity and goodwill. It would have been a fantastic twist and fit well within Jacob's character arc because we know he is a well intentioned person with Dumbledore even saying to him earlier in the film that Jacob is "a pure/good hearted person." Also, there is kind of a ridiculous irony that the "Qilin" - the bewitched dead one - bows to Grindelwald and identifies him as "pure" and then Grindelwald immediately proceeds to cast two Unforgivable Curses within the next minute in front of the entire wizarding world 😂. I was a bit disappointed with the resolution to the Blood Troth plot-line. The Harry Potter series was always great at coming up with fascinating storylines involving magical devices/concepts, but the resolution to this magical item felt a bit lacking. I was expecting Dumbledore/Newt to find a more clever way to destroy the Blood Troth(or maybe Jacob would use his non-magical insight to provide a unique perspective that might lead to an idea on how to destroy it). The other stylistic choice that continues to perplex me with each Fantastic Beasts film involves the wardrobe choices for most of the characters; why does every witch/wizard look like a 1920s gangster? They establish in the Harry Potter series that witches and wizards dress in a unique manner when compared to muggles. The lack of any color in the world - compliments of Mr. David "Director's Seat Who Is Way Too Comfortable" Yates - in combination with a serious lack of creative wardrobing is what contributes to this world feeling bland, lifeless, and unable to create a strong sense of magical wonder. Where are the crazy outfits? Where are the wizard/witch hats and crazy get-ups that we saw with different characters in the Harry Potter series. I want to see unique wizards with creative character designs and complex personalities similar to Mad-Eye Moody or Professor Lupin. My diagnosis for the remainder of the series would be to move on from director David Yates; and instead of jumping right back into production for the 4th film, let JK Rowling write the last two films first as novels. Then, when JK Rowling is finished with the novels, have a screenwriter interpret the books and write two films that translate the story effectively to the big screen - similar to how the Harry Potter movies were done. JK Rowling is an excellent novelist, but some storytelling mechanics that work in a novel do not always translate well to film. There is still another 15 - 20 years of in-universe time before Dumbledore and Grindelwald have their climactic final duel and letting JK Rowling take her time to correctly craft these final two stories might at least help end this series on a high note. They also need to increase the stakes in this story. This series is supposed to be occurring during the first Wizarding War where Grindelwald is thought to be the most dangerous dark wizard of all time. Outside of Grindelwald's belief in magical supremacy, and the occasional murder, we really don't see Grindelwald come close to the evil or danger that Voldemort presented to the wizarding world. We are told that Grindelwald is a dangerous dark wizard, but we don't really see it in the way I think we should as an audience. To be clear, this isn't the fault of any of the six actors who have portrayed Grindelwald - it's the writing. We know Voldemort is a dangerous dark wizard because the Harry Potter series begins with Voldemort murdering an infants parents and attempting to kill a child. We know he has inflicted mass PTSD on the wizarding population because the average wizard cannot bring themselves to even utter Voldemort's name. This film did a better job than the previous Fantastic Beasts outing of painting Grindelwald as a dangerous dark wizard, but it still feels like we need to see more before he can be considered in the same breath as Voldemort (and to be fair, that may be where the series is heading now that Grindelwald was unable to take over the wizarding world through "peaceful" means). Anyway, if anyone actually read all of this then I personally thank you 😂 Harry Potter was one of my favorite book/movie series growing up and I really wanted to see this series succeed - its quite a bummer to see it struggling(especially because I think there IS actually a compelling story somewhere in here).

The ACTUAL secret of Dumdledore, is that Credence is the lovechild of his brother and their SISTER, which explains the obscurial power being passed on, and why he was discarded. True story. Probably.