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I’m a 9, my wife is a 2. We did this for my birthday one year. We invited all of our closest friends and made it Superhero Pajama themed. We left it up for a few weeks. Best birthday month ever.
My type eight husband displayed his love for me last night by watching three hours of my current favorite show snuggled in bed with drinks after dinner. It was heaven for me and he knew it. The third episode was the season finale. I was afraid he would want to stop after two hours since he doesn’t watch a lot of tv. At all. But when I paused it he looked at me and said; “You want to watch the next one, right?” When I eagerly replied, “Yes!” And he said, “Why did you stop it? Press play.” with a smile, I did just that and snuggled in for a heavenly series finale. Of course I wouldn’t say no to starting season two tonight!
(Also a 6) This is totally true. If someone I didn't know well offered to walk me to my car I could have mixed feelings. Part of me would appreciate the gesture, the other part would be debating the odds that they will find out what I drive and stalk me, or worse... I've apparently watched way too many episodes of CSI & NCIS. 😂
Me, a 5, leaning around the corner at the Type 9: You mean you won’t be an active drain on my time and energy and are simply content to peaceably and intimately exist with me without demanding things I can’t give? Sold!
I'm 5w4 and my bestie is 9w1, seriously I can talk with her for hours no-stop about any kind of topics. It's so relaxing and exciting at the same time. My family's members only talk about soccer, gossip and spread negativity about what happens on tv (even if it's just a spot), it's so annoying.
TIMECODES: Type 9: (1:02) Type 8: (1:34) Type 7: (2:15) Type 6: (2:45) Type 5: (3:12) Type 4: (4:17) Type 3: (5:00) Type 2: (5:33) Type 1: (6:12) Bloopers: (7:14)
As a type 5, telling me you don’t know anything about a subject isn’t going to make me want to explain it to you, I’ll just dissociate out of the conversation... 😂
I'm a 9, and although I don't necessarily bring a laptop or anything in with me, the bathroom does tend to be where I go to cloister myself for a couple minutes lol.
As a 5, something as simple as someone saying "Hey, do you have a minute to talk?" before they just start unloading their problems (or even questions or comments or whatever else) unsolicited and vomiting words all over me, or forcing me to share, is really appreciated. It's such a simple courtesy that shows you respect my time, mental energy, and agency as a human being, yet one that many people can't be bothered with. Respect a 5's privacy, confidentiality, and desire for independence. I'm also very attracted to honesty, even if it's the kind of blunt, abrasive honesty some 8s have. Not sure if it's just the 4-wing, but I really admire people who are not afraid to go against the grain of society and have the creative courage to express their true selves and to think independently, outside the box, regardless of what the herd of sheeple think. I have a feeling most 4s will be attracted to the unabashedly "weird" too. I think most of my friends and partners over the years have been 4s for this reason. They are unapologetically weird, a little bit morbid and unafraid of "dark" topics, unique, creative, articulate, and always have something unique or interesting on their minds. If I'm going out of my way to interact with another human being, they better damn well bring something unique to the table that I can't get anywhere else!
The amount of times I(a 2) have broken down when somebody finally sits me down to see how I'm doing is embarrassing. But of course I could never just ask people to give me attention XD
Type 5: hardest part for most people is pulling my mind off the various crap knocking around in there. I have endless energy for my projects, but yeah... meeting new people drains me quickly.
As a 4, I can say that the response of the 4 on this video after being charmed with a sincere, interesting and quite snotty conversation is accurate. When you know, you know and that's why they call us the "romantics". Of course, many times we cry for our broken hearts, but then we write poems about it.
I'm a 5 and married to a type 7, a huge part of why I became interested in him was because 1) he wasn't clingy 2) when he asked about my interests he didn't come on so strong that I thought it was fake 3) he was naturally curious and would open me up to new interests and things to learn. If you act too interested in me I'm more likely to think something is wrong with you and not give you the time of day. Don't know if other 5s can relate to that.
I’m not super fond of clingy people but I’m just too tired to look for people who are interested in my interests. If they seem naturally curious to know I’m going to be very happy to share. Don’t know if I’ll fall for that person, but it’s a good start if we share some similar hobbies/ values indeed. That said authenticity might be a bigger turn on.
This is really accurate, I'm an eight and the other day my friend's crush (a six) told my friend about how a couple of girls were following him, and I wanted her to call him out for trying to make her jealous. Of course my friend (a nine) wouldn't.
As a nine I can confirm I would not have called him out. But that crush would have been immediately extinguished and anyone who knows me would have read it all over my face. 😂
I loved this video! You got the 5 down perfectly (I'm a 5). I wish you would've made this video like 3 years ago because it took me a while to figure out how to attract/flirt and love my boyfriend (he is a type 3). I have learnt you threes can seriously drown in self doubt over your own worth, even though you guys are like super humans and such hard workers? My energy is gone just looking at you guys haha. Anyway, keep the videos coming they're seriously helpful!
thanks for sharing your own experience dating and loving an enneagram 3. YES, we can really struggle with knowing our own worth and it's important to know that when dating us! I appreciate hearing your own experience, Val! Thank you!
same!! I just wanted to comment this. amy is an istj 3w2 on the myers briggs and enneagram. If she is by chance an istj aswell, then things would add up, lol
Same! The only thing is, if I go to a party, I don’t care to socialize. I just wanna go cuz I wanna dress up and feel cute. If someone talks to me or a conversation sparks I’ll go with it but I never go out of my way to talk to people lol.
It depends on the party. In my twenties I learned I loved laid back parties with friends and free flowing f drinks that went late into the night or early morning. So it ended up being fun conversations in comfortable places with blankets and sometimes even pajamas! My best friends and I still schedule these sleepover party dates. With kids the same age fun can be had by all. Or sometimes the dads have the kids which means no early morning wake up which is appreciated. I also love concerts. That is a shared live with my husband and what many of our date nights are if we are leaving the house.
As a 4w5, one difficulty I have with Twos is when I feel as though they might secretly want me to keep pressuring them to allow me to do something for them, the way Abby acted out in this video. Threes might do the same thing for a different reason. I can't relate to needing to do things for people in order to feel that you have earned their love, or needing to achieve or be busy to prove your worth, and it makes me uncomfortable and exhausts me when people aren't open and forthcoming about their needs, which Twos and Threes tend not to be. I might offer to do something and then say "Are you sure?" if they say no, and if they still say no, on to the next thing. And if you hold it against me, I'm gonna pull away from you, because I don't do guessing games. The Five in me doesn't want to waste that energy, and the Four in me values honesty and transparency about one's needs above just about all else.
I didn't know about Enneagram when we started dating, but I now know how my German directness got a latinos heart hehe (He's an 8) We absolutely love your content Abbey!
@@AbbeyHowe We are so obsessed with the enneagram rn, like trying to figure out the enneagram of basically anyone we know, and -as we can really see in your content - you're best at what your passionate about right? ;)
Im a 3, but I grew in a family 8 (I think) so even if I'd love to have someone to tell me that I'm awesome regardless of my achievements, when someone actually tells me that, I feel like they thought I wasn't going to be able to :(
🤣😂🤣😂 I imagine with that six introduction them having the safest, most careful, most bubble wrapped date of all time! Too cute! Loving this one, gonna rewatch it right now!
I didn’t know about the enneagram 14 years ago when I met my dh (an 8), but one of the first things he told me is that he loved how direct I was, and found it a bit startling but refreshing. I’m a 5.
Life path 8 you hit the nail on the HEAD life path 8s are so used to having to dig for metaphorical diamonds in rubble through people's words and meanings that when we can just be straight forward its like a breath of fresh air. Direct people of the opposite gender are our kryptonite
As an eight I consider myself hard to get since I usually the one who made the first move. However this video proofs me that even me can easily be swooped. I’m impressed, Abbey
/5/ the phrase in your intro, "if those things make you happy", really got to me. It does make me happy getting to know stuff about enneagram types, absolutely
Great material. :D So now we need the opposite video I mean about how to recognize that a certain type of Enneagram is hitting on us... or have you recorded one yet?
Oh my word, the one! The sheer happiness I feel just hearing a hypothetical situation of someone else organizing everything! And then the response. I could see myself being like that... 😂
Your videos are always fun. And I know you play with the stereotypes. But this 7 would prefer if her long-time love, a 5, were to tell me to pack a bag for a spontaneous road trip!
I'm currently writing a book about a 5 and a 6 falling in love with each other. I'm surprised at how spot on I was! Thank you for this video, it helps 🥰
I'm not much interested in being in relationships or romantic themes. But I like learning about it especially in typological point of view is interesting to me. - Type 1/5
My 27 yo son is a 5 and this mom learned a long time ago how to get him to talk...his interests are deep.This example of 5 is spot on for him. I ama four and this video has me now thinking I might have a 3 wing bc I relate to that more than the 4 example. Also I just started reading The Road Back to You, thanks to you!
I'm a 9 but not self pres. So didn't relate to this at all. As a sexual 9, I have no clear purpose of my own and find people who have big plans and purpose very attractive and come along for the ride and take on their project with them....
Haha, you're so right about Sigur Rós. And albums. And Fours 😂 I used to listen to this particular one on my headphones and it made my whole life feel like an independent movie 😄
Yes my 1w2 bride goes ga-ga when all the thinking and to-do’s are finished for her and she doesn’t have to run around worrying about everyone else’s problems
Wait, is there a way to know for sure what number someone is? As a six, I would be worried that I would guess their number inaccurately and use one of your suggestions that would completely blow out all standing I had with that person. (Classic six!)
Hi! I was wondering if you would be willing to make a video about the different enneagram types of the American Presidents? This is something that I have been interested in for a while. Thank you!
Abbey, do you have advice for someone like me who sees myself in a bit of all the types--I become what I need to be to avoid danger and seek comfort. That said, I definitely crush on cutthroat ambitious people who can be mean and can conquer the world so I don't have to do that myself...I just don't have the energy/stamina to be on the offensive all the time, and the little bit of offense I do is unpleasant to me.
Is it just me or 4s and 5s are actually really similar? At least both are really great strategy to me. However, what is the most important for me as a 4, to see your individuality, that you have enough self-awareness and don't want to be follow others in everything. Of course, I was always attracted to intelligent people - I don't know if it's a 4 thing, but I'm into 5s.
Your use of skits separate your teaching style of the enneagram from everyone else I’ve seen. Excellent! Sooo enjoyable! Now having said that… We love you for you and not just for the great job you do 😉
Hello from France! Thank you so much for your video, it's so interesting to learn about différents way of thinking. I like peacefulness so much, and I'm more calm and shy but at the same time my fear is to feel bored! I know I'm a 7 but I don't recognize myself in the extraversion, I feel like I'm a bit 9 too that's so strange!
Depends on who it is but most likely would be alarmed if a man asked to walk me to my car😅😂 I think if you’re interested in a 6 girl maybe go another route😬
im a 4 and i can attest to this, also im sure in other vids ive said i was a 5 or 6, i was still exploring in depth the types, i do relate to 5 at times, but im sure its my 4w5 showing its head. my husband doesnt want to take the test to get started in searching but after 17 years im almost positive hes a 5 and i show interest in his interest and it just lights his day but he quickly wants alone time
Is there any hope for a 7? I was married to a 9 for 30 years. My son just asked me yesterday after he saw this video which type I would be looking for. There's a whole bunch that do not look promising. I know all types will have issues (just like a 7 does). They have to be willing to socialize because we may not be the first ones there but we will be the last ones to leave...lol
Ultimately, it is up to the individual to know their enneagram type. It is not great to type other people! Here are some videos about that: things people get wrong about the enneagram: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-pPrMe7lf_EU.html confused about finding your own type: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-CZ3A-gnE7v4.html finding your own number: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-Forb08YD8co.html
