I always thought this ongoing skit was hilarious because in order to make a martini drier, you add less vermouth. Since these guys are usually drinking from a still, they are just drinking shots of straight liquor in martini glasses. It isn't even really gin. It's just full strength Korean War raisin based moonshine. It's probably about 120 proof as I never see anyone adding water to the mix and hours old at best. It's a wonder these guys lived through this at all. Drinking 2 hour old full strength rotgut raisin shine will kill ya but it will certainly help the job of forgetting what you have just been doing for 18 hours.
@@pressureworks Wow, the edgy guy reminds us all that TV isn't real. I realize that. Thus the term "ongoing skit". If you are not going to participate in art, then why comment? Sure, MASH isn't high art, but it is still television and comedy. Also, the concept of the moonshine still being in the swamp was from the book which was a real account. So, it wasn't fiction, btw.
My college economics professor told us what he believed was the recipe for the perfect martini. Keep the gin in the freezer. Swish the vermouth in the glass enough to coat the sides, then pour the rest back in the bottle. Add gin and TWO olives. Not one olive, not three, because olives are like testicles. One's not enough, three's too many, two's the way it's supposed to be. And that was the only thing I got out of economics class in college, except for the axiom that more is always better. More martinis, please!
When I was in a small Oregon town, I went to eight different bars for a martini to no avail, and I still had to fight for my martini at the last place. Tonight, at this very moment, I am sipping an excellent dirty martini with five olives in the fine company of two gorgeous well-dressed real dolls, and it is the best martini I ever had in my life.
I would like a dry martini Mr. Quahoc, a very dry martini, a very dry arad desiccated portable dust bowl of a martini this evening. A martini that can be named a disaster area. Mix me such a martini. Dry dryer driest, unwet, the ultimate perfect martini. A drink dying of thirst.
The perfectly dry martini: in a Boston shaker, coat one once of ice with dry vermouth (Sweet vermouth is an abomination before the Lord!) give it a quick stir, then strain the ice, pouring off the vermouth. Add 2 1/2 ounces of London Dry gin to the ice. STIR, DO NOT SHAKE!!! until the gin is cold enough to frost the outside of the shaker. Strain the martini into a chilled cocktail glass, over two olives. Two olives, not three, not one... They must be in the glass, as pouring the martini over them releases the essence of the olives just a little bit, making it a tiny bit dirty but not overpowering the martini. If any asshole tells you they like vodka martinis, that it must be shaken, or that it's okay to add the suffix -tini to any cocktail with vodka and in a cocktail glass, you punch them right in the face!
You, sir or madam whatever the case may be, are a fine example of humanity. Using sweet vermouth in a martini is like leaving muddled stems in a mint julep. You might as well just go ahead and give scorpions to a baby.
I like to order mine by saying I would like it as dry as the Sahara and as cold as the artic. After I get a sarcastic reaction from bartender I remind him you can look at the vermouth but don't touch that bottle dry understand!
In this episode, called "There is Nothing Like a Nurse," the nurses are evacuated due to a possible enemy attack and the character, Capt. Spalding (Played by Loudon Wainwright III) decided he would stand on his head in the Officer's Club until the nurses returned. He was promptly chewed out by Major Burns and ordered to stop.
The less vermouth in a martini, the drier it is. Five to one gin to vermouth is generally considered excellent. Taken to extremes though, your "martini" is nothing but naked gin.
I used this quote in my book and am disappointed to learn that you can barely even hear the beginning of the line. Not sure why they felt the mic should follow the camera but such a shame it's not clearer.
Basically a martini is gin and vermouth. The vermouth gives flavor. Therefore the less vermouth you put in, the drier it is. It can get to the point where you're "martini" is just straight gin.
