HOW DO I GET MY AVOIDANT PARTNER BACK?

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Have you been suddenly dumped by a person who appeared really into you and then left suddenly and seemingly inexplicably? Are you trying to use the no contact rule to get this person back?
This video talks about the harsh truth about trying to get this person back.
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Disclaimer: This is NOT a sponsored video. All opinions expressed are wholly my own.

Опубликовано:

22 июл 2024

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Комментарии : 59

@krisw2791 3 месяца назад

They „kind of“ come back…it will be okay for some time and when you get too close again they will pull away again. You will never get what you need, they are kind of right when they say „I can’t give you what you need.“

@ld921 3 месяца назад

They pick a fight to create space,

@marioct130 5 месяцев назад

Unless he changes, I don't want him back.

@annnee6818 3 месяца назад

They never change...

@almightybeanchild Месяц назад

He won't change. Men don't change

@disorder_go 19 дней назад

@@almightybeanchildAvoidant attachment has nothing to do with gender.

@almightybeanchild 18 дней назад

@@disorder_go I'd say a vast majority would be men due to overbearing and hysterical mother's

@disorder_go 18 дней назад

@@almightybeanchild I’d go as far as to it’s mostly women due to absent fathers.

@_--Reaper--_ 2 месяца назад

*Q:* How do I get my avoidant partner back? *A:* You don't.

@izzyunicorn9813 3 месяца назад

They come back multiple times but are not the same

@_--Reaper--_ 2 месяца назад

What do you mean they're not the same?

@jdimon8717 2 месяца назад

@@_--Reaper--_ I don't want to speak for Reaper, but I believe they might mean that (and this is typical) the next time or times they return, they return with a different personality or level of vulnerability. For example, one time they may return and be nonchalant, as if nothing happened, just to see what you are up to-- and a different time they return, they may act very open, talk about their emotions, and express to you their feeling or apologize. They may even be more available and open to having more than a physical relationship. So, it depends on the state of experiences the Avoidant is going through at the stage in their life when they come back to you.

@disorder_go 19 дней назад

Mine came back, told me things were better than ever before saying she felt overwhelmed and left again.

@user-gl8wt4zp7v 3 месяца назад

This is so sad! The last text I received from him was on March 26. I called him on 2 days ago and it rang, then went to voicemail. Even though I knew the end was coming, sooner or later, I’m devastated. The grief I feel is terrible. I do get a bit of comfort from these videos and know that even if he does reach out, nothing will have changed 😭 😭😭😭

@markdTX 2 месяца назад

Having tasted an avoidant for a while, anyone who wants them back has Stockholm syndrome.

@ld921 3 месяца назад

Yup my avoidant is leaving the country to get away from me lol 😂

@SurlyOne13 2 месяца назад

It’s in the name itself “avoidance”. Real change must occur for BOTH partners to work. Otherwise, be grateful it’s over… leave with what dignity you have left and focus on your own future.

@1984musicman Год назад

This is so healing. You truly understand the dynamic. I'm broken after being pushed away and dumped twice by a guy who I truly believe loved me.

@silassok4421 Год назад

Same

@annnee6818 3 месяца назад

Maybe he did and that's why he ran. It still hurts. I just had this happen, very early in the dating process but it still did a little damage. But at least I didn't cry...

@ourworldfinallyelaine 3 дня назад

Why would anyone want them back? The hot & cold. The push/pull. The disappearance acts. Instead of being worried about “them” coming back-get into therapy yourself. A healthy person wouldn’t want these people. Cut mine quickly after 4.5 months. Bye bye! ✌️

@ladyowl9187 2 месяца назад

I saw the signs and dumped him before he dumped me, but he tried to get the last dump 😂. So we kinda dumped each other in the end. I loved him. It's all very sad, really. We've been in no contact for 3 weeks. Ourgh

@robertgull5275 2 месяца назад

so real .......i still feel for her after a month of no contact.(3er time ) .....Fixing to walk away once and for all ...They are just sick to the core and won't bother hurt you ....

@chiaraA. Год назад

the cognitive dissonance is real and on its own, traumatizing, so I'd love to see your take on that, and how to heal and thanks!

@gayleneflower398 2 месяца назад

Same

@mint_soup9743 3 месяца назад

The way you relate to the listener, the way you resonate and it truly feels like you've been through it before- really makes me feel like I found the right resource here! Thank you! I'm new to the concept of attachment theory but I'm quickly believing its much more than theory...

@bluecoffee8414 19 дней назад

I agree. I've been so helped by his videos.

@mrsherwood2599 3 месяца назад

I always welcomed her back. For the night. It was GOOD. I'm not a very good person, but she was much worse. But did our bodies get along 😅

@CorvusCoroneCanisLupusSawel 2 месяца назад

worst experience of my life. was engaged, a stepson, pets, home, a good job/career. i lost it all because of her and her shitty ways. lies, betrayal, cheating etc but it was obviously all my fault. financially lost about 30 grand. 16 months on and it still hurts. the only true love i received in that relationship wasn't from her, wasn't from her young son, it was from one of the dogs. says it all really. horrible fcking people. the whole family, her ex husband and her friends were all toxic. the plus side is that i am now studying to become a counsellor.

@samyb2834 Год назад

Absolutely GEM of a video.

@peterkmartel Год назад

1st I want to know what I can say, to help them, and help me to move on, let go, without burning bridges, but also clearly knowing I don’t go back without therapy. Interestingly, she said yes to therapy, wouldn’t work together to find one, but when I found someone she found a reason to say no, and then declare the end, 6 months later. But she keeps hanging onto threads while pushing away, but no more. Thank you. No doubt I’m an anxious type.

@brunalina2275 2 дня назад

Why my ex avoidant DID NOT GO to non contact? He text me everyday telling me about his daily life!

@Nick-os3gn 2 месяца назад

Of all the youtubers I've been watching about this stuff, you have been my favorite by far. You truly understand the complexities of the dynamic, and it's so refreshing to hear the perspective of another gay man. Thank you so much ❤ I've been in long-term relationships, but nothing ever hurt like the ending of this last situationship I was in. The chemistry and compatibility were off the charts. I know he has, or at least had, strong feelings for me, and I think his trauma response to the intensity of our connection was exactly why things began to go downhill.

@Nick-os3gn 2 месяца назад

I also want to say that I'm so glad you point out the ridiculousness of friends' responses such as "He just wasn't that into you" and "If he wanted to, he could". Despite being well-intentioned, those words are painful to hear and simply false, though the latter took me a while to realize.

@ekruchowy Год назад

I also dated someone for 10 years and towards the end they would fly someone far away and live there anytime things were not ideal for them or too close. The last time he did that he flew to south America and was proposed to someone there within 3 months, something that I had always wanted.

@CorbinB-Rax Месяц назад

Why didn't you get it but they did? Mine seems to love being in a state of war with me, but blaming me, then coming back I don't get it

@ekstarr 20 дней назад

I could be wrong but most avoidants don’t experience oxytocin or serotonin. Just dopamine and cortisol.

@cherylthompson2731 3 месяца назад

Yes. They come back. Then leave again, then come back.

@CorbinB-Rax Месяц назад

Lol

@CorbinB-Rax Месяц назад

Then leave again. Then come back

@robertorange527 Месяц назад

You are literally describing my ex. This is exactly what happened to me. She had opened up about past traumas which was positive, but dumped me after ghosting me for a week out of nowhere and just after our two year happily celebrated dating anniversary. She said she's going through therapy and to work on herself.I wish her well but not holding out much hope of us being together. You make a tonne of sense. At least I understand what I'm dealing with now. Thank you.

@Healingwand 16 дней назад

Good question, now….. why do you want them back is the right question who have the original question.

@sterneprinzessin 8 месяцев назад

Love your videos. Always short and concise.

@KenReidCo 8 месяцев назад

Glad you like them!

@deerlow1851 2 месяца назад

is it even worth it?

@philipzanoni Год назад

Hey man. I really love your channel and have subscribed. I just wanted to say, be careful about using statistics because nobody really knows.. for example, you said "90% of the time" when referring to no contact rule.. but who really knows? I would have chosen "the majority of the time" or "most of the time" or even "usually" instead of 90%. anyway, I hope this unsolicited suggestion doesn't offend you. I don't mean it that way.

@KenReidCo Год назад

Hey Tony, I actually really appreciate not only the advice but the way you communicated that advice to me so thank you and I'll definitely aim to take this on board going forward across all my content. Thank you.

@fitnessmusic3329 16 дней назад

Amazing

@arianadebarros3652 10 дней назад

These videos are for people who want their exs back so why come on these videos talking about u don’t want them back if u watching this video u do want them back smh

@Marauder-kd8zi 6 месяцев назад

😢

@Marauder-kd8zi 6 месяцев назад

Geez traumatized by her emotional abuse I was her first relationship we are both 24 she told me at one point she spoke to her mom and said to me that her mom and her moms boyfriend relationship seems so easy well first of all there at the age where there tired of the games and drama and she was basically saying our relationship is not easy and it basically sums up the fantasy in there head cause relationships take work