I must say that is the best advice I have heard this far about not having friends..."if you don't have them you don't need them, concentrate on you" thank you ma'am.
@ jame tj I think friends are a waste of time and energy. Most are not there for you when you need them anyways. So better focus on making money so you can count on that for help. For example none of my so called friends would babysit my daughter. But I can hire one. None of my friends were there for me during my divorce. But I can hire an attorney and therapist.
@@taghazoutmoon5031 I must agree, why wait on someone who can help you decide if they want to help you when you can just pay for the service. When I did attempt to be friends it was good for giving moral support but it was draining. Oh well. Thanks.
@@jamie1425 it's like high school all over again. People want to be friends with the cool kids. When you're down and need help, nobody is there for you because you are not "cool". The popular kids are not even really that great. In my circle, they are below average, broke, but consider themselves "witches" and "artists" so they appear cool instead of the losers they are. They are only popular because they are popular, if that makes sense. Not because they are amazing people. Basically, people only want to be with popular kids, therefore making them more popular. When I say "kids", I mean even in your mid thirties and forties.
I turned 27 a couple days ago. I've been doing pilates, getting a bikini wax, getting petty daily, and learning a 6 figure skill ... Yea babe, I feel way better about myself.
I’m a woman and I’ve noticed women are sooo rude to me. When I’m nice, they’re bitchy. When I’m bitchy, they’re literally trying to get my attention by being overly nice. I’m so confused because wtf? People want to be treated like shit? Alrighty. Same with men too. It’s the weirdest thing I’ve ever witnessed. It created a complex in me because I wanted to be nice to everyone but would be discouraged to do so so I would try harder -> resulting in pick me behavior/mindset. I’m done being nice. The guys and gals can lick the ground underneath my feet.
@Jhay Thagreat It is real easy. And some people like to do so but do not like to be done so! Let these sayings be your guide to make your dreams come true! Other wise you will feel depleted and depressed!
Conference is key. Get up, get dressed up, when you look good you'll feel good and when you feel good, you don't have time for the mess! Take time to work on yourself. Exercise, buy an article of clothing once a week, etc. You will see an improvement on yourself and others will see.
I'm not gonna lie, I've been youtubestalking you for some time now. Not in a creepy way. I've been through a lot. Grew up in a military christian home and my mother always made sure I knew I was a mistake since she got pregnant with me 10 years after getting her tubes tied, then my ex who locked me in a basement for 3 months and my two little boys getting kidnapped out of the country. I've lost all my confidence. I feel like I never got a real chance in life and I don't believe in myself anymore but I listen to u because you help me stand a Lil taller every day. Thank you from the bottom of my heart 🥰
Find a way to drop what your mother saying that to you as truth. It's not. You're valuable already just by being here. Try and process it as , what does that say about an adult saying that to a child.... you're not or never in the wrong...move forward and grow in strength a little at a time. Binge watch SHERA, especially about self love
Thank you both very much. I'm trying to shake off this depressing state I'm in because I hate self pity and I've always fought with a smile on my face. It's just been harder than usual lately. Your kind words helps so much hugs
@vivian lopez In cases where there are deep wounds from emotional abuse, I would recommend seeking some professional therapy. Sometimes that's the best solution for working through these issues that could be weighing you down.
Someone said in the live chat that their boyfriend caught them watching Shera's videos. The same thing happened to me lol, I fell asleep while watching and I got caught, but he knows where I stand so I don't care anymore.
Play dumb laddies! " Oh, I like her hair, I clicked because I want to see if she listed her make up in the description." ect. Act like your not here for the content.
When you said your mom will start leveling up as your leveling after you call them out. A year ago my mom would be negative about me always dresses nice and wearing makeup. I end getting braces too. Less that a month later my mom started dressing better and got her teeth fixed. She ended up getting veneers.
Men and women hate on this lady bc she tells the TRUTH. no man should be asking for sex without coming out their pockets and no woman should be giving it away for free. Men are meant to be PROVIDERS point blank period. I wish my Mother would’ve had the ability to instill these values in me instead of having to learn through painful experience. Thank you Shera! SPRINKLE SPRINKLE
When ppl tell you that you can’t do something its either bc they themselves couldn’t do it and are projecting on to you or they know you can and are threatened by you knowing your strength and worth so they try manipulating you to “keeping you where they want you”
EGGZAKLEEE! Every time someone told me I couldn't do something a week later I've already done it.Use it as ammo ladies! Use those nay sayers as confirmation that you are getting what ever you want periodd
This is so real. Ever since watching Shera for almost 2 years now I walk tall and dress like a star everywhere I go, it’s like magick people stare and start believing your royalty plus they are seeing someone who is projecting loads of positivity and confidence in themselves so they want to spark up conversations and compliment you. I once worked with a vocal coach in Harpo studios in LA and my teacher would say “you look like a superstar every time you’re here, which is smart”. Thank you so much Shera!
Ladies, take advantage, the volition of your mind is the reason you can no longer be afraid of lost. Do not allow risk to be your focus. There’s No need to wait until 2020. Mistakes are not indicators of failure. Reassess, redirect and use your power. You are destined to be extraordinary!
@@taghazoutmoon5031 take a moment today and realize you can improve health by eating a piece of fruit, transferring a few dollars from checking into savings, start reflecting and figure out how your purpose aligns with your career choice, share time with your child rather its 2 hours or 20 minutes no distractions and traveling, girl start planning as if you will be leaving in 6 months for wherever you wanna go and make it happen!
LOVE Yourself! I'm DOING self love now. Losing weight. Getting Moroccan Scrubs-full Spa treatments. Salads alone in high end places looking GOOOOOOOD as I work on my sihlouette (sprinkle sprinkle). Honey, Dusty will take the lustre from your hair if you let him.
I used to think it was bad to stick my nose up and act conceited. Not anymore. You have to feel it, believe it, as well act as if you have self worth, and value regardless what others think.
UUUM... 1. if you’re hanging with losers, STOP doing it. 2. If you’re exposing yourself to negativity, STOP doing it. 3. If your hanging out with people who don’t support you and, don’t value you, STOP doing it.
I’m recovering from self hate and graduated to accepting and sometimes liking myself. Just keep at it gorgeous and you will get there! Shera helped me so much! Takes time ❤
Believe and start saying "no" to those things you don't want, even if you're desperate for now. The power of "no" is the scariest thing to those who want to abuse you, be it your family, your friends or the entire corporations. Even the homeless person can say "no" what stops you? People been putting me down because they stopped believing they can achieve something themselves. And I talk mostly about professional environment. I find this channel has more real advice than most others when it comes to the mindset, presentation and how to handle difficulties.
I live in a very dusty city...Bonnetta central. I look so out of place now..I didn’t realize how much your advice is needed. The men put more care into themselves than women.
@@Anastasia8880 you've probably been programmed to believe that.... I remember when I was little black cats were seen on TV as evil. Not true. I've had 2 they were the sweetest...
@@Anastasia8880 black is my favorite color of cat. If you go to my other channel "carlismycat" it has a photo of my gorgeous black boy "Carl" before he got old and died. He was a big boy too. I love love love black cats and think they are beautiful :) .
On the acne scares thing.i remember in junior high school I had this vocational skills teacher madam with big acne she had a really good shape so she took advantage of that she dressed,walk and talked with a confidence I couldn’t understand then how she could be that confident even with the scares but now I get it. We are not perfect but we should focus on the positives and tell ourselves that everything we feel not enough.
I am not confident in social situations, it seems like I love myself but am extremely nervous around people, I'm an introvert and dont go out and dont have friends or close family.
My husband (a provider) knows I watch Shera (though he doesn't know what she speaks about deep lol) and now knows about pickmes and dusties and agrees with it all LOL. When I explained to him if he would want his daughter to be with a dusty he immediately said "no".
Every woman needs to watch this video! This is single handily one of the most powerful messages I’ve ever received. Usually I take little tid bits from different people and different videos but this video is a pure gold mine.
this message needs to be heard time and time and time and time again.. you are a blesed messenger shera.. thank you for sharing with so much sincerity, you dont know how much you are helping all of us..we admire you and we thank you
I’m 37 minutes into this video and it’s all jewels so far. I love that You didn’t waste anytime with a long empty introduction to the topic. This is by far the most helpful video I’ve watched on RU-vid. Thank you💞
Shera you are truly changing lives. I think of you in almost every action I make, and it always keeps me on the right path. Also, I love this amazing community of women here. It touches and warms my heart, all of us women lifting eachother up daily. 💞 I always feel like you are the mom I never had
A former emotional abuser popped back up and apologized for being mean back in the day. He said he was in a bad place then. I never believed his insult lies. I would just insult right back.
Loving your hair in this video. Just like you said you have to switch up the styles and not being the same old same old all the time. Thank you for you videos they have changed my life and I love myself like never before.
A doormat can hit rock bottom only to have to get up and see the light. Arrogance is the worst form of ignorance 🤔. Thank you for posting. This an an important message 🙏🏽. If you the woman you the prize !
I need to hear this. Right now I don't have the confidence to apply for the next level up job. I need to build my confidence that was destroyed by abusive dusties.
Everything that comes out of this lady's mouth is GOLD! I been holding onto the wrong men's words when I should have been holding onto Shera's. SPEAK LIFE HONEY!
Positive self talk is a must and it works :) Praise yourself and repeat a list of positive affirmations in your head as you walk in daily life. It changes you Eg. I am; Beautiful Confident Fun Respected Wise Loveable Adored Etc....
You are SUCH a blessing Shera. Keep doing what you are doing. I don't think you know the effect you have had on so many women's lives. I have watched maybe a third of you videos and your insight and just brings me confidence and peace with your perspective!!!
I love your advice, I have grown so much watching you these past couple of years. I wish you would do a topic on raising teen boys and girls in this day. I use your advice to talk to my 12 year old son. ❤
@@mothegoddess5239 I never emasculate him and let him face his fears on his own and talk to him about careers and the fact that he will have a happier life if he picks a career he can make money at and that he loves so he will always have the money to take care of a wife and family. I also tell him it's his job in life to lead and take care of his family.
This is solid advice. Anyone ever notice with rapper/actress/producer Queen Latifah? She hardly lowers her head down because she sees herself as a "Queen" of worth and value and respect. Listen to her albums! The equivalent of Mr. T! Respect!!!!! As for other people opinions, men insult women by calling them Bitch, Whore, Slut, Ugly to control you. Other women insult you based on insecurity and competition.
85% of my town is nothing but Dusty people it's crazy I feel so out of place but I can go back wearing Winnie the Pooh t-shirt slippers I'm done thank you so much I love your Channel
It's been a WHILE since I watched your channel like about almost a year and it feels so good and refreshing to pull you up for advice. I feel like a young lady who has her shit together. Thanks for being on our corner.🖤
Stay away from people like really get alone keep the “noise” out ( spectators). Listen to affirmations for 10-15 mins morning & night Then focus on all the things your good at overcoming the next phase in the things you are good at will boost your confidence.
Back to the beginning about when she said “if they can’t do it, they will tell you you can’t do it”. It’s very true. Perfect example in the pursuit of happiness when Chris was solving the rubix cube in the car and didn’t give up until he solved it. The guy with him told him there was no way he would solve it because he himself couldn’t.
about the friendships part, ive had no close friends i truly trust for 5 years and im 16. maybe i havent gone insane yet bc i have a very close relationship w my parents and my 12 yr brother, but one thing that i remind myself is to stop believeving u need anyone to be successful and confident, however it will be easier with someone out of ur family circle u can trust. i really miss to have a friend, but i never let the not very present feeling of loneliness engage me with dumb and insecure people who project their feelings onto u.
There's a lot of truth and what you're saying I can relate. I fall to the trap of becoming a human doing instead of a human being a lot. Traumatized by the people I loved instead of taking ownership of me and what I can do. I owned the Trauma instead of the solution. And all my life it just kept on getting worse until I owned myself flaws and I started talking stock of what I can do and what I have done. Being a human being is ruff and to think we all signed up for all this. Life is to become human especially in today's society. Because there are some real monsters out there that will gum up your works Lickity split.
i cant...soooooooooo simply she says it... with levels of clever options.."yall have to start thinking like me" in other words, Your confidence lies within...from a true psychology major and playing/leveling up the game. Do some homework ladies before you ask the master...respect
Love you SheRa!! Leveling up out here and enjoying so many things I cannot even say....although mistakes along the way as well. Everything will be ok, because!!! Still learning from you, to value self. I really hope all the females catch on because this is how to get back to the family unit that we all craved and still crave biologically. Keep legs closed ladies.
