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Don’t #1: Don’t double message
In the wise words of eminem, when it comes to DMing strangers you only get one shot, one opportunity. Don’t double message. This means, if they don’t reply to your first message, don’t wait ten minutes and then send another, and another, and eventually a massive paragraph about how you thought they were the one. They don’t owe you a reply as you are basically a stranger who is trying to hit on them on the internet.
So choose wisely and make sure your first message is the best you’ve got.
Do: Polish your profile
This is extremely important: you need to make sure your profile is solid before you make your move. If they don’t know you, the first thing they’ll do is go to your page and look for pictures of you. So not only do you need to make sure you have some flattering photos of yourself, you should make sure that you look like the kind of person they’d want to date or at least meet. This means, instead of front-facing camera selfies, opt for pics of you out in the world with people. Candids if possible.
Your bio is the next thing you need to lock down. You should make sure you have a short, funny bio that will tell them a bit about yourself. Don’t go longer than three sentences but in there should be some real info about yourself. Right now, you’re a bit of a question mark. Give them something to go off of and if they like what they see, there’s a better chance you get a message back.
Don’t: get mad
If they don’t respond, don’t be surprised or outraged. It makes sense, really. You’re a random person on the internet.You have no reason to be upset much less angry at them for leaving you on read. The important thing is you took your shot and can now move on.
Remember: this is a risky move so there’s a pretty solid chance it won’t work no matter what happens.
If they don’t respond, be graceful in defeat. It doesn’t mean anything. This person doesn’t even know you.
Do: your homework
Do some research on them. Don’t use this info right away. You don’t want them to know you know their age, height, mother’s maiden name, and credit score. But having some info will allow you insight into their personality and give you the edge if the conversation progresses.
Do: respond to something they posted.
Your best case scenario when it comes to sliding into DMs is that they post an instagram story like “What’s the best pizza place in town?”
You reply with a funny answer, you get to talking and you offer to take them out for a slice. Next thing you know you’re eating ham and pineapple off their lower back in the comfort of a holiday inn express on your honeymoon. If you’re lucky.
Here’s why replying to a post is your best bet, even if it’s clear that you’re just using it as an excuse to talk to them. It’s because it makes your message seem spontaneous rather than calculated. If they haven’t posted a picture in weeks and you message them out of the blue they’re going to be wondering how long you’ve been thinking about this.
Do: Send them the kind of message they can’t ignore
No, not a bomb threat. I just mean no “hey” no “u up” no “what that thing do?”. You want it to be personal, quirky and funny if possible. Plus, it needs to invite comment. Don’t just hit them with a joke. Ask them a funny question that makes them think. Be weird but not too weird.
Do: Make fun of yourself for sliding into the dms
This shouldn’t be your first message but at some point it’s great to poke fun at the fact that you slid into their Dms. This is a great way to break the tension, show that you have a sense of humour, and let them know that you can laugh at yourself.
Do: focus on the here and now
Don’t move into the typical “what do you do” “do you have any siblings” talk. Keep it light and fun and focused. The idea is to have a unique interaction that shows them something about yourself without you reading them your resume. You want to remain mysterious and exciting while revealing yourself to them as interesting and interested in them. The trick here is to make jokes and ask questions.
So there you are, the Do’s and Don’ts of sliding into DM’s. I want to hear from you. Have you ever successfully slid into someone’s DM’s? What’s the weirdest message you got out of the blue? Please comment below. And while you’re at it, why not subscribe to my channel? It helps me keep making content for you all and keep the lights on over here at Jessica Boss Studios Incorporated LLC. Thanks for watching! Bye!
28 июн 2024
