I Stopped being Judgmental and it Changed my Life 

How much thought have you given into whether or not you're judgemental, and have you ever thought about how changing that might change your life for the better?

After much introspection, I’ve concluded that whisper in the back of my mind that people around me are judging me is actually just me judging myself and no more.

I used to be so judgmental, when I realized how horrible of a person I was and changed, I gained so much confidence and felt so good.

Here’s a tip on how to be less judgemental: if the first thought that comes to your mind is judgy reinforce it with a second thought that is nicer and compliments that person. For example the first thought could be “wow they look trashy” the second thought afterwards could compliment what you just judged like “they’re eyes are pretty” or “they look like a nice person.” The first thought is what you’ve been trained to think but the second thought always shows your true character.

Be humble. That's the key.

Emotions are contagious, if you radiate hate it's reflected back at you, judgement is a form of hate.

benefits: 1. more compassionate 2. good tempered 3. don't take it personally 4. healthier relationships 5. more open minded 6. more appreciative how? 1. see things through a natural lens 2. change of phrasing 3. pause start by seeing things through a natural lens, then pause to think, pick your words wisely

The fact we're all hear listening to her advice is a great step in the right direction. Good job everyone watching!

When I notice that I'm feeling judgmental towards someone, it usually reflects on some repressed insecurity of my own. V helpful when I feel judgmental towards someone, because then I can be like "aha!" and actually realize something about myself that I may not have otherwise noticed.

I decided not to be a judgemental from today onwards and i don't feel comfortable writing something in English and posting online because i don't have good English and i am doing it . I want to come out of my comfort zone. Thank u for your video and it inspired me ❤️

You face doesn't hide the awkwardness you feel. Thanks for sharing your awkwardness so we could have a real conversation.

The sound of water in the background is really relaxing

I love how she goes straight to the point and stays on topic I seriously can’t watch RU-vidrs who just keep making faces and talking about their camera

did anyone else notice she got just a bit more comfortable throughout the video... thats amazing!!

1). You did great, you can easily do more of these. What a beautiful background. Hearing the sound of water is never annoying. 2). Great talk as always! We have to self reflect every single day in our lives regardless of age.

I like how sunlight has changed the colour of your ears.

„Everytime we judge someone, we reveal a part of ourselves that needs healing”

Your presence is so calming. I used to find that when I talk to people I tend to bring up something negative to talk about (i.e. complain about traffic, weather, etc). when I realized that, I didn't want to do that anymore. Now I try to do more active listening or talk about smth positive in my life.

I love how she observing her surrounding. Her eyes are darting around, looking to see if people are looking and silently judging. But also to see who’s around her. I would do the exact same thing.

I just realized how immature I am lol But I wanna change, so that people enjoy my company and I can have good relationships😊

my mom is very judgmental of everyone so I'm going to send this to her

Thank you for displaying your courage .. I'm also quite introverted .. and I think you did it wonderfully.

Everything is a mirror so I realised that whenever I judged someone/something,it shows who I am as a person not them. Plus I am the type of person who don't want to be judged so why should I judge others? Also you attract a lot of good friends because they subconsciously feel comfortable with you,they know you always try to understand first and not judge. And thank you for spreading the word ♡ this video was also super calming

Facing things that make you uncomfortable means growth! This is an awesome way to face your fears.

This is so weird. I just had this talk with my boyfriend before watching this video, bit different but with the same result. I started analyzing why I was always so irritated at everything lately. Like, literally EVERYTHING. Obviously before jumping into the conclusion that I had anger issues I decided to self analyze myself and I started to notice that every negative thought I had about anybody and including my persona is what was affecting me so much. It’s been a bit over a week that I decided to stop being so judge mental and I can’t say with certainty that it will 100 % work but given the circumstances right now of not being able to go out I will continue this journey and I’m positive this will work out for me in the long run because I’m feeling much better mentally. And as I came across this old video of yours it has reinforced the idea to continue this method. So in a way, thank you!

I think that when you truly learn to let go of negative judgement, you’ll stop worrying about the judgement of others. And even if they are judging you, you’ll be able to understand that they’re still on their own journey to letting go of that judgement. Thank you for this enlightening video! :)

🤘🏼 we only judge others because we ourselves are insecure, closed and unfulfilled. You have a wonderful way with words, you speak with grace and politeness. So sweet and attractive.

I really loved how this video was filmed out in public. With all the distractions and people yelling in the background it felt so raw and real, and I felt it just made your video even more honest and beautiful. I truly love the message in this video.

1-See things through natural lens 2-Pause to think. 3-Pick your words. Love that Lana >> You did great job in this video. I enjoyed it. answering your question: I think being judgmental or not is not always a choice you make. I think our previous experiences impact on how we think or act. However, I do believe that the more we become conscious about it the better we get in controlling our thoughts.

My anxiety would be on a 💯

It's cool that you recognized this at a young age. I know people over 40 who still are judgemental and not open minded. These individuals wonder why no one wants to open up and express their feelings .enjoying your videos.Thank you

We all save a lot of energy by just remembering that everyone’s wired differently, morality is not objective, everyone has their own baggage. Emotional maturity is when you know when to pull out of a discussion/argument/quarrel when you know nothing is going to come out if it (which is most times). Say less, think more., I guess

It’s really cool that the temp of her speech is slow, it gives a better chance to dive in that location with all the sounds around you and Lana sitting in front of you and explaining you how to stop being judgmental

So wise beyond your years. Took me much longer to come to these revelations. Wish I was younger when I discovered this important truth for finding happiness. Learning how little we know and how much more we can learn is the greatest knowledge. Learning what comes around goes around is so key. We need to treat others as we want to be treated which is like one of the golden rules we all ignore in youth. You're so ahead of the game Lana.

Lately, I realized I though people were judgmental but I was just thinking that because I kept judging others. I ended up thinking that everybody was like that but really, most people just don’t care about others ( in a good way ).

I've found that I'm the biggest judge of myself. I would be dying if I had to film myself in public, but you did it so courageously and it just heightens the message of the video. You're the most insightful person I've watched on RU-vid and I'm grateful for your content. Also, I am judgmental as hell! I say I hate certain films, video games, music, art, literature. I guess there's a difference between having certain tastes and being judgmental, and I've been the latter. It happens all the time with music, that I'll hate a certain artist's album, then a month later I'm listening to it all the time and looking back on how naive I was. Thank you for this.

Courage isn't doing what is easy and having no fears about it. Courage is attempting what fills you with fear and walking through it. Thanks for doing this Lana.

Congratulations on pushing your comfit zone. I find I'm less judgemental when I'm doing okay and more judgemental when I going through a rough patch. This video has been a good reminder because I have been going through a rough patch lately.

I loved how you looked so much more comfortable when talking to your audience, thanking them and all, like you were really talking to them directly so it wasn't as awkward as talking to your camera :)

Getting out of your comfort zone & doing this kind of thing(filming in public) really inspired me. Inspired me to always keep pushing, inspired me to conquer my social "little" anxiety. Such a strong character. Thank you. 😊

Growing up, I am surrounded by judgemental relatives that makes me so insecure now. Sometimes, I know, I am also being judgmental to others too, but I get so guilty easily. I am not comfortable talking about other person's business or issues, especially if the person being talked about is not with us, it makes me feel like these people around me also does the same thing to me when I am not around them. I'm trying to build my confidence but being surrounded by judgmental people makes it so hard.

When you stop being judgemental have empathy and mercy for other people and spread Love then you reach the next level of consciousness. Peace from England UK

The only person I really judge is myself, and what I’ve been trying to help myself understand is that the majority of everyone has a very similar mindset. I am the type of person to read over my texts four or five times before sending it to try to make sure it sounds chill, but not too rude or casual at the same time. It sounds psychotic, but really I just have extremely terrible social anxiety even though I love my friends and hanging out. I will literally come back home from a nice lunch with friends or a party and cry til I have a migraine and have to force myself to sleep just thinking about how much I hate myself. I’ve been pushing myself lately to go out of my comfort zone and coaching myself to fight against my social anxiety by joining my university’s committees and volunteering in orgs because it gets in the way of so many opportunities.

I love what you said about what you know. It is very similar to what Socrates said about wisdom... "A wise person knows only that they know nothing." All greatness begins with humility. You are beautiful inside and out.

Because when you stop judging other people.. you will automatically stop judging yourself. And that’s the key to happiness. ❤️

Imagine how beautiful world would be if everyone watch this videos and learn to be less judgemental.

My reflection after I've watch the whole episode. I've been judgemental about this video at first. I've watched first couple minutes then I thought I know everything what you're gonna say and wanted to stop there. Glad I didn't. There is always something we can add on while discussing or rethinking the same topic we went through. No matter how many times we did. I really enjoy your calm attitude and that you think before you talk. Thanks for this video. Take care

I grew up in an extremely over judgmental home. I’ve heard my mom do it my whole life she heard her mother do it. My mother would always judge people’s appearances job status cleanliness of their home and made instant opinions of them. That same standard was put on me growing up I had to look a certain way perform to be approved of. Conform to what she thought was perfect. The whole time as a child losing my identity. I lost my wonder to play and get dirty I had to be perfect in every way. I confused what love really was. As I became a Christian these negative ways of life really came to light and I started wanting better. I began changing myself. But my mom and my sister still struggle terribly with this, it really breaks my heart and frustrates me to be honest. It’s also affected my marriage as I’ve been overly critical with my husband. It doesn’t leave room for mistakes it’s not graceful or forgiving at all there’s no love in it. I don’t want to be that way I want to break free and see the world through free eyes not only for myself but for others as well; to show the love of Christ.💛

Being less judgemental essentially opens you up to an entire world you couldn't access before. I feel like it also has a noticeable physiological effect, you feel like you have more room to breath. You're not in a constant state of both defence and attack but rather embody a measured openness to life and therefore are able to accept more of its "gifts". As you stated, these come in the form of stronger, more genuine relationships, engagement in deeper more balanced conversation about film, music and so on. Funnily enough it also gives a greater sense of responsibility to other people as you pointed out when you mentioned you could give better advice. Shed judgement and its effects are profound. Nice video!

You speak so clearly to what I want to pursue with myself and my habits in life. I'm so grateful to have found your channel. Thankyou for putting yourself out there and going public with your words like this. I could only imagine how much of a challenge it is and APPLAUD you for that! You're on my same wavelength and I just love what you have to say!

I know i’m late to this video. But I just want to say, i’ve never felt so inspired by a video more than this one, in regards to being confident enough to challenge yourself. I mean, you really sat there and pushed through that wall of discomfort that is so evident throughout the video. Amazing! I love this and I love you keep doing what you’re doing.

the rawness of this video made it feel like a conversation i really needed to have, all your points were really helpful.

You opened up a new perspective for me. I'm surprised by how something I've never paid much attention to has impacted you so much. Thank you for sharing your journey. Keep up the amazing work!

Everytime I don't like a movie, I find someone who liked it and so I always rewatch the movies and end up liking them everytime xd I don't know why that happens but it does

This makes so much sense to me. It’s so nice to see a young person like you come to this realization. It’s taken me a lot longer to get there, possibly because of my upbringing.

When you don't really know you're THAT judgmental, and Lana just pokes every one of those nerves and calling it out

Good for you. You'll only get better. I turned my back on judgementalism(another ism) when I heared Craig Ferguson at Larry Kings show say it's the type of person he hates most. Thing is. I was very judgemental in my early life, and when my own life got tough and I wasn't able to handle it properly I met the other side of that coin. And now I regret having ever been so arrogant.

Something I’ve come to realize is the huge barrier judging people puts between possible relationships with them

I think this is the most humble, grown-up way of being which most adults will never achieve.

This showed up in my recommended and I’m so glad I did. I’m definitely taking a lot from this, thank you 💛

Thank you for posting this and being brave to film in public 🙌🏿 I also realized that I can be pretty judgemental. Learning to take time to pause before coming to a final conclusion.

I am working on being less judgmental since a bit and I am already seeing changes but there is still some effort to do. This is an amazing video! Keep up the good work!

Amazing!! I barely ever spend actual 17 minutes watching someone talk it almost feels like having a conversation and not saying anything back i love u for making these videos

This is the first video of yours that I’m watching and I’ve got to say, you have this certain clarity to you that I’m striving to achieve within myself. I currently feel very lost in almost every regard and am beginning my journey to self-discovery and improvement. This video helped a lot, and gave me so much foresight into changing myself in a way I didn’t know I could.

I recognise so much of myself in you from when I was your age, except for those exceptionally good looks of yours, dear Lana. You’re going about overcoming your anxieties in just the right way. In my own case, I overcame my fear of being among people in crowded public spaces by purchasing a lovely, ancient yet very trusty Leica M6J, complete with 35mm Summicron lens and lots of roles of Kodak’s excellent Tri-X 400 film with which I, by sheer accident, began my career in forensic war- and reportage-photography. More or less shoving my camera and lens in people’s faces and risking them not especially liking it helped me overcome several other anxieties as well. Keep up your good videos and in a few years from now, with any luck, Sweden and the world might think of you in equal terms as Sissela Bok.

I just realised that, Ive been doing this for years. Without even having to think about MAKING a change in my life. It just came naturally to me.

Needed to hear this! I need to be more compassionate and soft-hearted. I am actively working on loving people more and being more friendly, kind, and helpful. rather than closed off, Judgmental, and cynical! It’s helping a lot. I had a really bad day yesterday - with people being very mean to me, and this video was nice to watch!

You are dropping some real jewels here. thank you for reminding me to consider my thoughts and express them as such. often times we try to command the thoughts of others to match ours and will not accept anything else

I just discovered your channel yesterday and I am very impressed with the content you upload. It’s so deep, meaningful and impactful, I really needed something like this in my life. Thank you, Lana for taking the time to share your reflections with us. I share a considerable part of your mindset.

What i’ve learned is that being honest with others and careful with your words makes what could be awkward situations a comfortable normal conversation

you trying to coming out of your shell and not caring about others really inspired me thank you

I love how this is 1 take, its really natural

THANK YOU - for this video. Authentic Raw Sincere Down to earth. LOVE IT! Can’t wait to watch more of your content.

You brought a very big smile to my face. You stepped out of your comfort zone. Well done girl.

It's so relaxing to see you talking, thanks for all your videos, they're helping me to change my lifestyle and the way I see things

i absolutely love this video, its so real and inspiring,I also enjoyed the sound of the water running in the background

i love this video. your voice is so relaxing and your mind is so beautiful. yay self reflection! moving away from being judgmental is one of the greatest changes ive made in my life too. This video really made me think more about how i can continue to be less judgmental. thank you so much lana! totally subscribing

I love how raw this video is, this makes me so happy!

I like how you present this so calmly. Thank you. Though I do my best not to judge, this is definitely, something I need to consciously think about.

I'm so grateful that I find you,you are such a wonderful,beautiful,smart and inspiring woman. I appreciate everything you say.You are like a healer and a teacher to my mind.Thank you ♥

I am happy I finally found someone with the same opinions as me (considering this and other your videos). I stopped being judgemental a couple of years ago and I came to it myself. However, there are a couple things I noticed and would like to share. Firstly, you can’t stop being judgemental at one moment because you will keep judging people in your mind. You will look at this person and think, ‘gosh, how can someone wear this?’. The thing is, if after this you think of ‘stop, what am I doing? I should not judge this person’, then you’re on a right path. Secondly, a lot of people around us are judgemental and some don’t want to stop being that way. For instance, you can walk with friend(s) and they will start judging people they know and/or people that just pass by. To that I always ask ‘why do you judge them?’ But I only get a ‘because I hate them’ in reply. It’s hard not to be influenced by people around us and I really try to, but sometimes I am and after that I feel shame. I think those of you who try being not judgemental noticed these things, too. I wish I had a friend like Lana.

I've been watching your videos for a while, and this is one of the best, seeing you natural, without much editing and a great subject to talk about. ;)

You are a beautiful soul, my dear. I have just found your channel and I am very grateful. I have a strong feeling you will be a wonderful addition to my life.

This personally has really helped me. Thank you for helping me see from another viewpoint. I have noticed that I tend to be quick to assume. And, pausing to think and be open to others opinions as well is something I believe can really help me. Without your video I don't know if I would have begun practicing this new way of thinking. This has been one of, if not the youtube video recommendation that has the potential to really help me in life. Thank you again and stay wonderful

Very brave of you for confronting the uncomfortable 👏👍

I discovered you and your channel yesterday and have been blessed so much, just to relate in so many things, it feels so wonderful to listen to you and what you have to share. Thank you for your awesome videos and the time you are investing into this super helpful content ❤️

i love that you're outside and the video is not too edited it feels very natural Id love to see more videos like this

It has truly changed my relationship with others and the way I feel about myself. It's not an easy thing to do and I mess up sometimes but humility is key in those moments as it helps me put myself back in my own place + allows me to see that what I'm doing is wrong so I can wholeheartedly apologize and learn from it.

I always wonder whether or not I am a judgemental person and wasn't sure how I could improve myself. thank u for this :)

I just love how authentic you are . It's peaceful

I am so grateful finding your channel with this beautiful video😍

The introvert part of you is in this video is stepping aside, your growing Dear👌❣️

This is one more gift for my birthday today. Thank you for that, beautiful. Love ya.

Being open minded is also what definitely had helped me in being less judgmental. A lot of times we think of someone who's doing something odd to us and immediately starting to think what is wrong with them and why there's pursuing a certain thing, but in reality we don't know the story behind it. This is actually inspirational to see you overcoming your fears and getting out of the comfort zone!

Wonderful video, you are so poised and well thought on this topic, being too judgmental has a lot to do with solitude at least in my case. I’m just starting to realize that and it is definitely liberating. Thanks for breaking this down 😊

Beverly Cañon Gardens, am I right? Loving your channel! ❤

Dear Lana, it's so crazy but within a few days, you became a role model to me. I recently just found your channel and already absorbed most of your videos. Thank's Lana for sharing you on such a deep level. You really embody what became most important to me in the last few months: "If you want a good life, work on yourself until you love yourself."

Love the part when you say, “...because I have a RU-vid channel.” I kinda bursted into laughter after taking all you said through. Love the rawness! I am judgemental too. Working on it. Thank you, Lana!

I find your though processes so relatable. I thought I was alone. Thank you!

Bravo!! Going live on camera while accepting yourself the way you are...hats off to your honesty and courage. As far as my opinion concerned regarding being judgemental, I'm very quick in judging people and putting a full stop on the conversation. But I want to change this habit, so that I can create more harmonious relationships.