@@legionrules4729 that should be the expectation. That's why it's a gamble to invest in relationships, especially when the government is in your bed and your wallet.
@@legionrules4729 yes..once she dumps you, she gonna do it again faster because she will never respect you. You have a better chance creating good relationship with new person.
Even in my younger days, my self pride prevents me from begging. Of course it hurts, but mostly after 2,3 weeks i've noticed that it's really over for me. No coming back. But to be honest no former girl ever come back although i'm friends with some. My conclusion then was that the girls feel earlier when things are over.. and after days/weeks i felt it too. If think it would be like warmed coffee..... at least so far
@@legionrules4729 that's at least better than chasing after her because chasing after her never works. it's especially pathetic if you use flowers and money to bring her back because material things have nothing to do with her attraction towards you and that's also a psychological truth.
Yup, dont wanna force something that isnt there that will screw you very severely. Some dudes dont see that though, they become obsessed and infatuated with a woman that dont even care about them
Hey , are you trying to attract or win back your ex , specific person ( SP ) , restore a broken relationship / marriage or banish a third party from your relationship💕💕💕💕
Except women aren't capable of loving a man to begin with. They really only love the things you do for them, the things you buy for them or the status you give them. They are just incapable of loving a man they way a man can unconditionally love a woman.
Hey , are you trying to attract or win back your ex , specific person ( SP ) , restore a broken relationship / marriage or banish a third party from your relationship💕💕💕💕
Hey , are you trying to attract or win back your ex , specific person ( SP ) , restore a broken relationship / marriage or banish a third party from your relationship💕💕💕💕
Happened to me aftter being together 12 years with 8 years of marriage. She went cold and asked for a separation. I quickly found it it was a guy she dated 26 years earlier. They married the day after our divorce was final. Five years later they are now going through a divorce. The grass wasn't greener.
Very helpful. I did so much of that trying to keep them when I was young. It got me nowhere except feeling like a big turd. If they want to go, let them go. Why even try to be with someone who doesn't want and appreciate you?
I made the same mistake once when I was young, I learned from that and from then on I let them go without any fuss. Ironically several tried to reconcile later, even though they dumped me.
Hey , are you trying to attract or win back your ex , specific person ( SP ) , restore a broken relationship / marriage or banish a third party from your relationship💕💕💕💕
I just watched this again as it is (along with so many of your videos and classes) SO extremely invaluable as a source of how to better myself and my interactions. I'm just curious about why it is so easy for women (in general, of course) to just transition to being friends with someone she was romantically involved with, and why they even want to, so much more than it is men, who, again, in general, are much more likely to just not bother with a woman who breaks up with him. Do you think that it could be that true friends are more difficult to find/in scarcer supply for women and finding a romantic partner is much more scarce for a man but a lot of men do not have difficulty finding and keeping friends (yes, more generalization, I know).
I met a wonderful woman while grieving my marriage. Talk about timing. I hope when things settle down and I go through my process, we can come together. The process has been mutually tough for both of us. We went too fast too soon. I couldn't help it, because we connected on so many levels. I have to learn to help it. I like this video, thanks!
Like most guys, I made this mistake a lot when I first started dating and one positive thing that’s not mentioned a ton is the affect on yourself, you touched on it with self esteem. I’ve found that not groveling, begging, etc really just helps you jumpstart any sort of healing process you might need to mentally move on. I’ve always been sort of a quick to get attached sort of guy when I’m really into someone, and especially in the age of social media it’s hard to break that. One bad and good thing about this social media/texting/virtual dating landscape is I think how artificially manufactured a lot of feelings can be. It amazes me how many times I’ve realized that I convinced myself through constant texting/social media/thinking about someone that a breakup will really hurt, had extreme anxiety about a potential breakup convo, and then ended up being significantly less impacted by it when I actually just responded with a “ok that’s cool” attitude. My advice would be to speak your “okayness” into existence. Project that you’re cool with it, and most of the time you will be sooner than if you drag it out and hold out hope. And even if you’re not eventually cool with it, at least you set yourself up for a potential second chance better than if you’d thrown a fit or been overly emotional
A lot of coaches don't agree with staying friends... They say once friend zoned forever friend zoned! Why do you disagree? Why should we spend more time chatting to a girl not interested?
I agree with Bobby on this, but I'm going to add that the timing he mentions, and the reasons they leave which he mentions as examples (such as reconnecting with an ex, an old crush reached out, etc.) also sets the stage for her often times (not always) making an eventual return to YOU when she learns that things weren't all that bad with you after all. Would you ever want her back upon those conditions? Well, no! And how Bobby says to react upon being dumped only serves to remind her more still that you were always the better person.
i've seen good relationships happen when the timing is better. In general though, once a girl ends it, mentally move on. If you find yourself thinking about her six months or a year later, shoot her a text, but be UNATTACHED to the outcome.
@@SKRooU2 cool name,but it all depends on why she did that or what is happening at all,not all relationships are the same,some may go back together for a real one,dont you think?
If she wants to be friends, so be it. Now you have your freedom back, go work on your image. Ditch the freaking burger and eat healthy. Workout if you haven't already. Work on your charisma. Now if she wants to come back, say this...sorry the door is closed. I'm in a relationship with myself. I love myself.
@@legionrules4729 I'll actually offer perspective somewhat favorable to both you and Heavy Metal. First, Heavy Metal makes a great point about slamming the door shut forever, as people often either don't ever change, or it takes a LONG time for them to, which comes back to "If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always gotten." Likewise, I believe Legion Rules makes a great point, which brings to mind the art and skill of diplomacy. There are truly people out there who are skilled at sitting down and talking by first asking the question, "Okay, so what happened?" This not only takes work, and a willingness from both sides, but an acknowledgement by both sides of how they'd been contributory toward the end outcome, and by learning "the why" of how they'd arrived there they can possibly begin anew without arriving at the same outcome. Sounds far-fetched, but it IS possible, and it CAN happen, and if not, Heavy Metal's solution as a "Plan B" is pretty much the only option. Thank you to both of you for contributing to this dialogue .
Hey , are you trying to attract or win back your ex , specific person ( SP ) , restore a broken relationship / marriage or banish a third party from your relationship💕💕💕💕
In the heat of the moment that is very difficult to do! But after having my heartbroken and treated like a pile of sh*t I have no problem saying that and meaning exactly what I'm saying. I've learned it gives you the power and I've learned to use it kindly. Thank you my friend!!
This is assuming a woman has the maturity to even have the closing conversation and doesn’t just completely ghost you, which is how things are done these days.
True and a good point. Most will simply ghost, stop replying, go cold or feed you some other bullshit like "not ready for a relationship right now". This actually makes it a lot worse as the natural reaction of guys is to want to know what happened, what you did wrong, did she get with someone else etc. There is rarely a proper closure so you have to draw a line yourself and accept it's done, delete them and move on.
Hey , are you trying to attract or win back your ex , specific person ( SP ) , restore a broken relationship / marriage or banish a third party from your relationship💕💕💕💕
Hey , are you trying to attract or win back your ex , specific person ( SP ) , restore a broken relationship / marriage or banish a third party from your relationship💕💕💕💕
Not only does it make no sense to stay with someone who no longer wants to be with you, but if she's breaking up with you, then she's already decided she wants to see other guys. So if you do manage to talk her into staying with you, she's going to start looking around for someone "better" anyway and may even start cheating on you when she finds that guy. I've seen a girl do this right under her boyfriend's nose. If she wants to break up, just let her go, like Bobby said. He's absolutely right.
Hey , are you trying to attract or win back your ex , specific person ( SP ) , restore a broken relationship / marriage or banish a third party from your relationship💕💕💕💕
There is no point in staying or trying to change her mind, if ANYONE asks you to end things, then you should move on. Regardless of the reason, just move on.
If she ends whatever it was, it was because she wasn't happy and you didn't read the signs. If you decide to give it another go with her later, first talk about what it was on her side that made her come to that decision in the first place. With situationships taking over, it's usually a lack of commitment or communication. If you don't choose her, she'll make sure you know she no longer considers you an option. Definitely the reason why I cut off my relationships. Who has time for games when life is short?
Wish I had seen this 2 months ago when my girl pulled away. I made all of the stupid mistakes you talked about. Hoping a 2 month blackout period can change things
you are still making a stupid mistake by hoping things will work out with someone that honestly doesn't want to be with you. If she really cared about you she wouldn't have pulled away. YOU have an illness called oneitis. In your mind she is the only female in the world. Man you need to realize you need some one better and that really cares about you. The biggest mistake was on her. Let her realize the mistake SHE made and FIND someone else. Trust me you don't want her. YOU will always have doubts and wonder if she will walk away again. Good luck.my friend !!
Hey , are you trying to attract or win back your ex , specific person ( SP ) , restore a broken relationship / marriage or banish a third party from your relationship💕💕💕💕
Hey , are you trying to attract or win back your ex , specific person ( SP ) , restore a broken relationship / marriage or banish a third party from your relationship💕💕💕💕
I met my girlfriend in a facility that treats mental patients. She worked there for a few months then quit. We became friends and the boyfriend and gf. But she moved to cali to escape the cold weather. So we had this long distance relationship. What fucking pissed me off was that whenever I wanted to discuss about our relationship, she would change the subject. Towards the end she completely ghosted me for 7 days. I finally confronted her. She admitted that she no longer had feelings for me. And the lets be friend speech. I never looked back
Wanting warm weather was an excuse If she had been committed, no polar vortex would have separated her from you. If you both worked similar jobs, You probably didn't make enough money for her If you were a patient. She realized her mistake. Cali was a great choice for her because she could have been in a lot of trouble being with you. She crossed a boundary. She sounds like she had some serious issues herself that were unresolved.
Reminds me of the old song ... "got along without you before I met you gonna get along without you now." That said, a gentleman never slams any door in a lady's face ... once she's finished rambling; simply smile, say okay (not goodbye), and leave. That puts it all on her and will destroy her vision of her future without you. And finally, never take any woman right back. Give it at least 6 months ... that's when you will know if she's worth the trouble. Most relationships aren't.
Why would any guy want to be with a woman who doesn't want to be with them? She's going to treat you badly, perhaps even be hostile towards you. It is not going to be a pleasant situation. Odds are if you cut her off and don't see her for 3 or more years you will be saying to yourself "What did I ever see in her?" if you see her again.
Hey , are you trying to attract or win back your ex , specific person ( SP ) , restore a broken relationship / marriage or banish a third party from your relationship💕💕💕💕
Welcome to the world of no integrity or loyalty. Most girls will monkey branch with no remorse if something seemingly better comes along....and it will with all those social media apps she is on 24/7! I have the mindset to just enjoy it while it lasts and never let your emotions control you. If she ends it, smile, and move on. She failed the vetting process...
Your point might be correct but it's hard to have that kind of mindset while your girlfriend (for several years) is breaking with you. She might have broken with you in her mind 6 months earlier and already mourned the loss so that when she really is breaking with you she is past that point. But you are usually caught with your pants down (ok, you might have seen some red flags and just didn't realized it was that bad) and probably will lose your frame.
Remember when it comes to women she is not yours it is just your turn. If a girl dumps you let her go forget about her and if she comes crawling back don’t take her back it means that she failed to find a better option than you the right thing to do is to move on and find a better younger and hotter girls and then when she comes crawling back if she does let her wallow in her bad decision of dumping you
"she is not yours it is just your turn" LoL. That is so wrong in so many ways. If i want one night stand relationships. I keep it as that. I dont actually go into a relationship with the mindset. Well, at least it is my turn to nail it for a while. 🙄
@@pqsnet oh, you certainly don’t have to go in with this mindset, but you better be the best option she can get otherwise statistically she will show you that it was just your turn when she finds a better option than you. You can totally go in thinking it’s all gonna be sunshine unicorns, and rainbows forever, but maybe just maybe you’ll find out life doesn’t always work out that way and if you’re dumb enough to get legally married and you all of a sudden find out it’s not your turn. You will get raped by the divorce machine. It’s OK you can totally pretend the female nature doesn’t exist, you do you man and good luck
I had a few women break up with me, many years ago. Eventually they would come back, but the problem then becomes, since I didn't do anything to bring about a break up. Why would I want them to have the power to hurt me again. Generally, I would simply decline. And just like he said, that became their challenge.
Oh no no no. If she shows no interest in wanting to be part of my life, or if she tells me that she doesn't want to continue with a relationship or situation that we have, which by the way, is not friendly but intimate, it's to be finished, and that's it. Not to play the game of maybe or being friends or any of that nonsense because if being friends was what I was interested in, that's what we would have been from the beginning and in the first place. I will happily and kindly agree to her request or suggestion to finish whatever we have. Next, she will be immediately and easily replaced, and in order to be a part of my life again, she will have to measure herself against other women in rotation who have clearly shown interest and have put into that work to be a part of my life. You do business in another way with these women and they will attack you with the fury of 1000 suns because they KNOW that you should not handle them in another way, and for depriving them of experiencing the anxiety they call 'love' of fighting for someone who's not easily accessible to them. Stay focused on your purpose, work on your best version everyday and serve your present with virtue guys.
Hey , are you trying to attract or win back your ex , specific person ( SP ) , restore a broken relationship / marriage or banish a third party from your relationship💕💕💕💕
I thought you just broke down in tears and begged her not to leave. Then swear on your own life that you can change. Possibly offer her money ? Buy her a cute puppy. Text her constantly begging her to come back. Threaten to kill any guy you ever see her with. Turn up at her place of work and cry.
I agree with the sure response but not as an opportunity to get her back. I would say it as an opportunity to find someone that does want to be with me as in good riddance. You shouldn't want to be with someone that really doesn't want to be with you. Somebody that really cares about you won't be wanting to break up in the first place.
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed and my ex is back to me, we love each other and we're living happily together, I got help from a great man who brought us back together
Hey , are you trying to attract or win back your ex , specific person ( SP ) , restore a broken relationship / marriage or banish a third party from your relationship💕💕💕💕
I just say "Ok" and move on. Drives them crazy when you don't beg them to not leave you. Now I not saying its not hurtful and I go thru some rejection pain but I will do that in privacy by myself.
I like this guy's optimism and clearly what he says has some merit. However, as an older not particularly successful ladies' man I am not sure it is so relevant. It is always a lot easier when you have options coming out of your ears.
True. No need to get too Alpha butt hurt and just eliminate her from your life. A lot of times her leaving you is a test and if you play it right her attraction for you is reassured. I just dont know how to handle it when they start talking to you again :/
This video is so true! If only I watched it before the girl said she wanted to end things. I tried to convince her and felt like I made myself look worse. Realising I should have just said okay and left it there. Now I’ll just let it be, and if she bites she bites and will message me back
I recently discovered your channel and been watching all your videos man you're so on point I can now see all the mistakes I've been doing you've opened my eyes can't thank you enough Bobby much love ❣️
Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed and my ex is back to me, we love each other and we're living happily together, I got help from a great man who brought us back together
Hey , are you trying to attract or win back your ex , specific person ( SP ) , restore a broken relationship / marriage or banish a third party from your relationship💕💕💕💕
Hey , are you trying to attract or win back your ex , specific person ( SP ) , restore a broken relationship / marriage or banish a third party from your relationship💕💕💕💕
Well that's 11 Minutes 13 Seconds of my life I'll never get back. If every guy would learn one simple little world, then peace and harmony would hold sway in the universe... and that word is "NEXT". That's it. That simple. That easy. And whatever you do NEVER EVER have anything to do with her again. When you see her coming, cross the street. Because your heart will betray you into losing whatever last vestige of self respect you still carry. You can always go back to your crib and have a good cry.
@fidelis asanterna If a woman has dumped you... why on earth would you invest more emotional capital in her? Why open yourself to more heart ache? Why on earth would you want to lose what little dignity you have left by groveling and simpering?
Hey , are you trying to attract or win back your ex , specific person ( SP ) , restore a broken relationship / marriage or banish a third party from your relationship💕💕💕💕
@@clinteastcoast Hello I'm so excited my relationship was fixed and my ex is back to me, we love each other and we're living happily together, I got help from a great man who brought us back together
Hey , are you trying to attract or win back your ex , specific person ( SP ) , restore a broken relationship / marriage or banish a third party from your relationship💕💕💕💕
Say "I didn't want your eggs anyway, I can get a dozen at the grocery store!" Go out and buy a dozen, and throw them at her car while exclaiming "bltch! phvck my species! i got video games!" Passion and independence. Throw in one but only one "You broke my heart!!" to shift the blame and guilt to her, and also to indicate you have a complex emotional life going on inside you, but are free to act like a little kid throwing a tantrum because you live your feelings like you're riding the crimson tide and are not a dead toad.
@@spencervance8484 You don't understand women! You've got to amp up that drama level. Because: hot make up s3x! You want to be a blg plg lovln maclne! ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-hZeghFNETa4.html
I agree with the stoicism of not reacting super emotional when ex breaks up. Don’t ask a lot of questions or try and change her mind. But I don’t agree with just saying “ok”. Just say you’ll miss them and goodbye. No need to act like a hardass.
My girl friend of 4 months ended things with me. I did all the typical nice guy traits , learned this after watching video, I agreed to stay friends and she is still contacting me. What is the best way to attract her again? There was attraction and interest on both parts. I just gave her all the power
How does it feel to be her male tampon while she is being banged by other dudes now... Seriously never be friends with x girlfriends you want to get back together with...
I recently had a girl pull away and break up with me; I thought that she was the love of my life. I realize that I moved too fast and she wasn't there yet. I wish I had gamed her better.
And this video did totally fit me both ways and I would tell them that I appreciate their honesty and will honor and respect them and not be a Pest or bother them !! 😊
Mr. Rio Not all of the three things are always true. You need to understand what attachment theory is. If you don't, I highly suggest you read the book called Attachment. If one of the person has an anxious insecure attachment style and is dating an avoidant attachment style. The avoidant one will always pull away not matter how long they've dated. The avoidant person some where along the line was triggered and ended the relationship, kind of like quitting before getting fired. The attachment style is on a spectrum, in other words some avoidants are more avoidant then others, just like some anxious insecure are most so than others. It can workout no doubt but the avoidant needs a lot of space because they regard their freedom and independence above all else. Especially the one who says they are a loner. It all goes back to their childhood and how they were raised. Just because a women breaks up with you is not always what you think it is and is not a bad person and is worth dating if you can live with that kind of woman with that attachment style or visa versa.
Number one rule in a relationship....do not text. Always talk on the phone. In fact try to talk less on them. You entered a relationship with me not my phone or your phone.
I got that ending speech. And what did I do? Let's see - confessed my feelings and emotions, told her that I sensed she liked me way before and her feelings were real, told her I'd be there for her in times of need, offered to 'ease' our relationship if she feared bonding further. I know I know... I'm more than embarrassed now, but it is what it is. I really fell in love with her, it's hard to explain. But I did reach out after 2 months of no contact and at least we'll be working together on my project next month. I'm not expecting anything at this point, she's kind but super formal with me. I learned a ton with Bobby. At least this last part was good on my end and she did bite. It's not big, nor promising, but it's a start. I won't do my mistakes again, but it could eventually pave the road for something more, if there's a genuine connection. If it happens to be just work, so be it. I won't chase ever again.
Hey , are you trying to attract or win back your ex , specific person ( SP ) , restore a broken relationship / marriage or banish a third party from your relationship💕💕💕💕
This is great. I am meeting with a former date this week. 5 dates on the 5th date she asked we be exclusive, I came down with covid plus she was at a big time in her life with lots on her plate hence the timing. A week later she broke up with me. That was 3 months ago. We stayed in contact via social media and text. She asked we meet up for a drink this week. Hmm. I maybe can use this advice if its a friend zone offer
@@JohnnyArtPavlou went great. She took me out for my birthday a month later then to a concert. After a few dates as friends she asked me how I felt about her. I told her and we have been together and never more in love with each other.
